redwood-project: guidebook

Grow Big.

M E M B E R G U I D E B O O K

2 Grow Big: Member’s Guidebook

416-578-1928Redwood-project.com

3The Redwood Project

TABLE OF contents

THE REDWOOD PROJECT .............................................................5

SECTION ONEDEvElOPINg yOuR REDWOOD PROJECT aRSENal .................7

Open Communication......................................................................8Levels of Listening...........................................................................9The Happiness Definition...............................................................10The Happiness Breakdown.............................................................11

SECTION TWOIDENTIfyINg THE ElEmENTS Of yOu ........................................13

Values..................................................................................................14Language of Values..........................................................................15Peak Experience...............................................................................17Voids....................................................................................................19Epic Face-Off.....................................................................................20Strengths...........................................................................................22Values Show & Tell............................................................................24Interests.............................................................................................26Saboteur.............................................................................................28Future Self.........................................................................................32Relationships.....................................................................................34Come Together..................................................................................35Power Sources...................................................................................37What’s Next.......................................................................................38Redwood Scheduler.........................................................................39

THE REDWOOD BOaRD .................................................................40


THE REDWOOD PROJECT

Welcome.to.the.REDWOOD PROJECT.

Based.on.the.idea.that.asking.simple.questions.can. make. a. big. impact,. the. Redwood. Project.presents. Foundations,. a. process. designed. to.arm.young.men.&.women.with.the.capability.to.Grow.Big...

Just. because. the. process. is. simple. does.not. mean. it. is. easy.. Identifying. the. basic.components.of. the. individuals.we.are.and.the.best. ways. to. use. our. own. elements. to. great.ends.takes.clarity,.focus.and.practice..

Living authentically as who you are is the biggest risk of all. With it come the very biggest rewards. Here’s to that Risk.

Awareness.&.Action.are.the.cornerstones.of.this.Project..the.activities.of.this.experience.guide.deliberate.action.but.it’s.the.individuals,.the.members.as.the.Redwood.Project.has.coined.them,.that.take.the.lead.and.enjoy.the.results..this.effects.today.as.much.as.tomorrow..

Become who you are.

immediate, noticeable benefits

long-term lasting impact


THE REDWOOD PaTH

RulES:

1..No.one.gets.to.be.wrong2..You.are.not.allowed.to.say.I.don’t.know/not.sure/because3..the.contents.of.our.conversations.are.confidential

elements retreat be me

philosophy

personal leadership

.over.the.course.of.the.retreat,.we.take.a.snapshot.

of.who.you.are.now..A.detailed.inventory.of.what.

makes.us…us.

this.involves.4.group.Redwood.Sessions.and.3..1:1.conversations.with.the.

lead..this.is.where.we..write.our.R.A.P.

A.combination.of.traditional.leadership.&.teamwork.

mixed.with.personal.awareness,.ownership.and.

responsibility..

share your story.

grow big.plant the seed today.praCtICe, Create & aCt.


SECTIONoNe

developIng your redwood projeCt arsenal

Here’s where we look at the skills needed to maximize the Redwood experience you have begun. As a nice bonus, you’ll notice that as you practice these skills, they will set you apart & serve you well in the ‘real’ world.


ACTIVITY 1 open communication

BAttle.BoRedom..Be.UNPREDICTABLE.

curious.People.are.the.ones.who.find,.seek.and.explore..By.asking.questions,.they.bring.out.the.best.in.people.and.make.themselves.look.great.in.the.process..When.it’s.their.turn.to.speak,.they.do.so.by.sharing.what’s.important.to.them.and.skipping.the.banal.&.obvious..they.resist.clichés.and.are.respectful.and.appreciative.of.the.people.around.them..

IT STaRTS WITH WIDE OPEN COmmuNICaTION.

aCTIvITy Tally•. Round.1:.I.learned._______________.things.

•. Round.2:.I.learned._______________.things.

follow-upDid you learn more in Round 1 or Round 2? Why? In what round were the answers more

interesting? Which was a better conversation?

what? oh sorry, i thought you were talking to someone else...

1223


ACTIVITY 2 levels of listeningthere.are.good.listeners.and.there.are….less.good.listeners..You’ve.seen.them.and.know.who.we.are.talking.about..

THREE faCTS

Becoming.a.good.listener.takes.practices..It.is.a.skill.An.active.listener.is.as.engaged.in.the.conversation.as.the.speaker.listening.well.is.a.source.of.power.

THREE lEvElS Of lISTENINg

LEVEL 1... listening.for.your.chance.to.speak... . Spending.the.conversation.in.your.own.head.LEVEL 2... having.the.conversation.driven.by.your.own.curiosity.LEVEL 3.. Using.the.space.and.individual.body.language.to.‘sense’.the.unsaid.

STRONg, aCTIvE lISTENINg INvOlvES uSINg ONly lEvElS 2 & 3

123

REALLY LISTENING?

sounds great!go on.

awesome.yeah, cool.

follow-upListen to the story. Which listener would you rather talk to? Think about how you’re listening and try out both levels. What would you say next? How does body language change the conversation?


ACTIVITY 3 the happiness definition

WoRkING.oUR.WAY.to.A.NeW.deFINItIoN.oF HAPPY.

ExPaNDINg THE DEfINITION Of HaPPINESS

my.happiness.Score.today:._..._________________.

think.about.what.makes.you.happy..Right.Now..let’s.find.images.of.what.“happiness”.looks.like.

THE HaPPINESS myTHS

1..YoU.FINd.hAPPINeSS...the.idea.that.happiness.is.something.you.must.look.for.or.wait.on,.vs.taking.charge.of.today..

2..chANGING.oUR.cIRcUmStANceS.IS.the.keY.to.hAPPINeSS...AkA:.destination.happiness..When.this.happens,.then.we’ll.be.happy..

3..YoU.eItheR.hAve.It.oR.YoU.doN’t..It’s.a.myth.that.you.have.no.say.in.it..once.you.know.where.happiness.comes.from,.you.can.create.more.of.it.

gOOD TO KNOW/KEy TERmS

.

follow-upHow do we traditionally think about Happiness?

How does this view box us in and remove options? How can we think about Happiness in broader ways?

What areas truly impact Happiness? What happens when we are happier more of the time?

•. the.hedonistic.treadmill•. emotional.thermostat.•. Positive.Affectivity.•. the.3:1.Ratio

•. Flow•. Gratification.&.Pleasure.vs...

enduring.happiness•. Intentional.Activity

6


ACTIVITY 3 the happiness breakdown

ENDuRINg HaPPINESS = S + C + v

variableset range

50%40%

10%circumstance


SECTIONtWo

IdentIFyIng the elements oF you

We are now armed with a new set of tools. Awareness is a crucial skill to living well and preparing yourself for what’s next. So many people go through life never doing the work to look behind the curtain and find out what they have to share. They don’t get the chance to ask the questions to find out what they need to be truly happy. Like our good friend GI Joe says, “Knowing is half the battle”. And who wants to tell GI Joe he is wrong?


VALUES

this.section.starts.with.understanding.your.values..they.change,.but.also.form.a.compass.that.we.will.not.ignore..What’s.true.to.you?.What.defines.you?.Articulating.&.pursuing.your.values.is.a.crucial.component.of.a.big,.complete.life..

CREaTE a PERSONal CODE

this.code.will.guide.you.through.life’s.choices.&.events.

It.will.be.your.interpretation.of.what’s.important,.what.you’re.proud.of.and.what.you.use.every.time.you.are.playing.at.the.top.of.your.game.

this.is.not.about.morals.or.right.or.wrong,.but.think.of.it.as.a.filter.through.which.to.interpret.what.you.see,.say,.hear.and.do..the.goal.is.to.eventually.remove.any.discrepancy.or.gap.between.your.actions.and.your.values..When.there.is.a.gap,.we.are.out.of.whack..Nearly.every.time.you’ve.been.angry.or.frustrated.can.be.traced.back.to.you.stamping.on.one.or.more.of.your.values..

know them.share them.


ACTIVITY 1 language of valuesROuND 1

highlight.all.the.words.below.that.jump.out.at.you..these.mean.different.things.to.different.people..Which.are.important.to.you.personally?.What.could.you.not.live.without?.What.do.you.think.about.or.want.more.of?

ROuND 1 Tally I PICKED ______ WORDS.

Accomplishment,..Success

Accountability

Accuracy.AdventureBeautycalm,.peacechallengechangecleanliness,.orderlinesscommitmentcommunicationcommunitycompetencecompetitionconcern.for.othersconnectioncontinuous.improvement

cooperationcoordinationcreativity

decisiveness

delight.of.being,.joydisciplinediscovery

diversity.

efficiency

equality

excellenceFairnessFaithFaithfulnessFamily.FlairFreedomFriendship.FunGlobal.viewGood.willGoodnessGratitudehard.workharmonyhonesty

humility

ImprovementIndependenceIndividuality

Inner.peace,.calm

InnovationIntegrity

Intensity

Justice

knowledge

leadership

love,.Romanceloyaltymaximum.utilization.(of.time,.resources)meaningmoneyopennessPatriotismPeacePerfectionPersonal.GrowthPleasurePowerPracticalityPreservation

PrivacyProgress.Prosperity,.Wealth

Punctuality.

Quality.of.workReliabilityResourcefulness

Respect.for.others

Responsiveness

Results-oriented

Safety

Satisfying.others

SecuritySelf-givingnessSelf-relianceSelf-thinkingService.(to.others)SimplicitySkillSolving.ProblemsSpeedStabilityStandardizationStatusStrengthA.Will.to.Succeed.teamworktimeliness

tolerance

traditiontranquilitytrust

truth

Unityvariety

Wisdom

76


ACTIVITY 1 continued

ROuND 2

From.the.list.on.the.previous.page,.cross.out.all.the.‘aspirational’.words-..these.are.the.words.which.you.feel.you.should.have.more.of.or.would.like.more.of.

ROuND 2 TallyI CROSSED OuT ______ WORDS aND am lEfT WITH ______ valuE WORDS.21 55


ACTIVITY 2 peak experiencelife.is.made.up.of.moments..Some.of.these.become.remarkable.memories..When.we.think.about.those.experiences.most.special.to.us.and.what.made.them.so.incredible,.it.can.tell.us.a.lot..

ROuND 1

Guest.Reporter:.________________________________________________________.the.true.story.of.a.Peak.experience.unlike.any.other.(in.a.couple.of.sentences):..______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Using.your.new.found.language.of.values,.listen.to.your.partner’s.story.to.hear.for.their.values..Write.them.all.down.below..You.should.be.looking.to.find.around.20..to.do.so,.you.will.need.to.put.on.your.best.reporter.hat.to.get.to.the.bottom.of.the.story..Ask.questions..experience.the.story.with.your.partner;.find.out.about.the.day..learn.what.happened.and.how.they.felt.when.it.was.happening..Get.the.details.you.need.to.identify.20.values.

.Now,.share.the.list.of.values.you.wrote.down.with.the.storyteller..together,.refine.the.words.above.and.make.sure.they.ring.true.for.your.partner..Points.for.creativity,.badassitude.and.personality..

But.most.of.all,.make.them.true.

•.

•.

•.

•.

•.

•.

•.

•.

•.

•.

•.

•.

•.

•.

•.

•.

•.

•.

•.

•.

blaire baker The story of building the strange duck & floating it down the biggest river in Chile for 8 days with my friend Marc

loyalty

adventure

determination

friendship

optimism

resourcefulness

commitment

accomplishment

engineering

creativity

endurance

discipline

force of will

experience

stamina

connection

inter-dependence

problem solving

humour/fun

progress & growth

& originality

do what’s tough

jump off the cliff

certitude

certainty of self

exploring &

couragefearlessness

innovation powerful

connection

& playfulness

loyal teamwork



ROuND 2 PICK yOuR TOP 5

the.storyteller,.together.with.some.help.from.the.guest.reporter,.now.pick.out.the.5.values.that.feel.and.fit.the.best..

2

1

4

3

5

CongratulatIons.you have a

Code.

leadership & adventure

certainty of self

jump off the cliff

creativity & originality

powerful , loyal teamwork


VOIDS

the.flip.side.to.values.are.voids..they.are.the.dark.passengers.that.can.effectively.render.your.code.powerless.and.quickly.steer.the.ship.in.the.wrong.direction..Just.as.our.values.are.consistent,.so.too.are.we.plagued.by.the.same.voids.over.and.over.again..here.is.the.good.news:.knowing.they.are.there.and.what.they.look.like.is.the.fastest.way.to.diffusing.them.and.putting.your.values.back.in.the.driver’s.seat..

let’s.get.theatrical.here.and.think.about.the.contest.between.our.values.&.voids.as.a.righteous.battle.between.Good.&.evil..And.who.better.to.illustrate.these.different.sides.then.Yoda.&.darth.vader?.that’s.right,.nobody..


ACTIVITY 3 epic face-off

ROuND 1

Go.back.a.few.pages,.grab.your.code.and.write.these.5.values.below.Yoda..once.you’ve.done.this,.think.of.the.corresponding.word.or.thing.(the.void),.that.most.often.prevents.you.from.living.and.leveraging.that.value..Write.these.words.under.lord.vader.

ROuND 2

1..

2..

3..

4..

5..

1..

2..

3..

4..

5..

1..

2..

3..

4..

5..

1..

2..

3..

4..

5..

yoda vs. vader

yoda vs. vadera tIme

won

a tIme

won

leadership & teamwork fear

comfort

habits & avoidance

anxiety & isolation

pernicious doubtcertainty of self

jump off the cliff

creativity & originality

powerful , loyal teamwork

the mountains of morocco with my sister, Katie

first year at queen’s

launching the redwood project

a relationship that went on too longorganized workspace

blackberry

white & champagne fundraiser

delivering growth at proctor & gamble4th year documentary: breuklyn project

leaders & partners of redwood

& connection

smalcolm

Sticky Note

My work at blackberry


ACTIVITY 3 continuedROuND 3

Find.which.one.of.the.above.face-offs.from.Round.2.is.the.moSt.epic,.the.one.you.notice.the.most.and.that.comes.up.the.most.often.in.your.life.

ROuND 4

Pick.a.side.with.your.partner.and.get.it.on..It’s.time.to.Face-off.

follow-upWho won this test of will & cunning? The thing is, it could have been either one and this is pretty much like what happens everyday. Sometimes your values win, sometimes your voids can be too much to handle. As we move through the Redwood Project, we will begin practicing and developing skills to ensure your Values can consistently come out on top and stay in control.


No.surprise,.but.your.strengths.are.things.you.are.good.at..But.here.is.the.kicker:.we.use.our.strengths.to.build.our.values..When.we.focus.our.energy.on.activities,.interest.and.goals.that.call.on.our.strengths.we.do.them.well,.naturally.and.with.ease..We.learn.and.get.better.quickly..We.are.able.to.enter.a.state.of.Flow.(which.we.will.talk.about.in.our.everyday.Action.Session).in.which.time.stops.and.we.are.able.to.perform.at.our.very.best... .mY.toP.5.STRENGTHS.(as.determined.by.my.vIA.Survey.of.Strengths)

. . .

So.many.people.spend.their.lives.determined.to.build.weaknesses.into.strengths..It.may.be.a.‘better’.weakness,.but.it.will.still.be.a.weakness.and.probably.provide.you.with.a.ton.of.frustration.in.the.process..think.about.working.hard.enough.on.your.weaknesses.to.the.point.that.it.will.not.be.a.handicap.preventing.you.from.attaining.your.greater.goals..

STRENGTHS

12

34

5

bravery & valour

capacity to love & be loved

love of learning

creativity, ingenuity & originality

social intelligence


STRENGTHS continued

12

34

5

According.to.dr..Seligman,.a.leading.researcher.in.the.United.States,.Signature.Strengths.are.the.strengths.of.character.that.a.person.owns,.celebrates.and.frequently.exercises..Which.of.your.top.strengths.above.jump.out.at.you?.Which.excite.and.invigorate.you?.Which.ones.do.you.naturally.and.most.often.use.and.show?.most.people.we.interview.can.readily.identify.between.2.and.5..

mY.SIGNAtURe.STRENGTHS

through.the.power.of.perspective.we.can.reframe.school,.homework,.relationships.and.commitments.in.terms.of.how.your.signature.strengths.can.support.and.enhance.it..this.is.the.focus.of.our.final.Redwood.Session:..everyday.Action..

BuT uNTIl THEN, IT’S TImE TO BRINg THIS HOmE WITH a lITTlE DRama…

bravery & valour

love of learning

creativity, ingenuity & originality


VALUES show & tell

So.much.comes.back.to.values,.so.let’s.come.back.to.them.and.think.about.how.they.are.revealed.in.other.ways..

a PROuD mOmENT

THE OBJECT I BROugHT TO REPRESENT THIS

follow-up

What is this object important to me? Why am I so proud of this? What does it mean to me?

Racing at the Head of the Charles Regatta in Boston

A picture of my crew, all in our Queen’s tri-colour, me in stroke

passing under the Weeks Footbridge


my HEROES

...._____________________________________________________________________

...._____________________________________________________________________

Your.family..A.favourite.writer,.musician.or.leader..Your.best.friend..the.longer,.the.more.varied.and.the.more.personal.the.list,.the.better..You.can.tell.a.lot.from.someone.by.the.strength.and.style.of.their.heroes..Who.are.yours?.Why.do.they.excite.and.inspire.you?.What.have.they.accomplished?.What.have.they.taught.you?.how.have.they.changed.you?

VALUES show & tell continued

HST, Dougie, Hemingway, Mum, Dad, Kate & Leslie, Jerry Garcia, MLK Jr. Jack Kerouac, John Montgomery


ACTIVITY 4 interestsour.interests.say.a.great.deal.about.us..they.reveal.our.style.&.skill,.our.excitement.&.motivations..After.surviving.the.intensity.of.the.qualifying.round,.your.top.16.interests.have.made.it.to.the.biggest.tournament.in.the.world.

WORLDCUP OF

ANDTHE WINNERIS:

public speaking

canoeing

meeting great people

meeting great people

parties

parties

parties

cottage

playing guitar

playing guitar

photography

being on a great team





take.10.minutes.to.think.of.your.16.favorite.things..What.do.you.love.to.do?.What.do.you.really.appreciate.in.life?.Be.honest..Be.as.specific.or.as.broad.as.necessary..one.rule:.no.friends.or.family..Proceed.through.the.rounds.with.your.groups.and.help.each.other.out.if.you.are.stumped..there.will.for.sure.be.some.tough.match-ups!.let.the.games.begin!

YOU


music

music

making things happen



writing

adventures

adventures

adventures

adventures

adventures

skiing, sailing, running

reading

reading

playing & watching sports

christmas


SABOTEUR

As.we.start.to.become.aware.of.the.elements.of.you.and.begin.practicing.how.to.take.full.advantage.of.them,.you.will.notice.an.inner.alarm.go.off.(maybe.you.already.have)..this.happens.when.we.are.preparing.to.take.big.steps.forward..All.of.us.have.a.self-sabotaging.voice.whose.mission.is.to.hold.us.back.and.preserve.the.status.quo.–.he.likes.things.just.the.way.they.are..Fortunately,.you.are.AlWAYS.stronger.and.smarter.than.this.conniving.troublemaker.

SaBOTEuR faCTS:

1..We.all.carry.them.and.we.will.never.fully.get.rid.of.our.Saboteur2..It.is.always.easier.to.hear.in.others.than.yourself3..When.controlled,.your.Saboteur.can.be.a.helpful.voice4..the.Saboteur.will.evolve.as.you.grow

we want our saboteur

but neveron the bus,


to.begin,.transfer.your.5.darth.vadar.“voids”.and.times.when.he.won.to.the.first.two.columns.below.

how.do.you.control.the.Saboteur?.the.first.step.is.recognizing.when.he’s.around..the.Saboteur.lives.in.the.shadows.so.the.only.and.best.way.to.put.him.in.his.place.is.by.shining.a.light.on.his.actions.and.calling.him.out..But.to.do.this,.you.have.to.know.what.you.are.looking..What.is.his.unique.voice.–.what.are.the.phrases.you.here.in.your.head.when.he.is.causing.trouble?.thinking.of.the.times.when.vader.won,.what.was.the.voice.inside.your.head.saying?..Record.these.phrases.in.the.corresponding.column.

When.writing.your.phrases.you.might.end.up.using.the.same.ones.more.than.once.or.you.may.have.a.different.one.for.each.situation..What.are.the.common.phrases.and.themes.which.appear.again.and.again?..

ACTIVITY 5 saboteur

voids vader phrasesa tIme KIller

won

1..

2..

3..

4..

5..

fear

comfort

habits & avoidanceanxiety & isolation

pernicious doubt

first year at queen’s can i make this work?

people won’t try this

you won’t find anyone elseyou can’t keep it clean, so why bother?

this isn’t where you are supposed to be

launching redwood project

relationship that went on too longorganized workspace

blackberry


It’s.now.time.to.create.a.Wanted.Poster.for.your.Saboteur.and.to.get.the.word.out.that.a.new.sheriff.is.in.town..

modUSOPERANDI:

WeAPoNSoFCHOICE:

hANGOUTS:

StYle:

ALIAS:

dIStINGUIShINGFEATURES (tattoos,.birthmarks):

WANTED saboteur

WANTED

telling me I am not good enough to share something amazing

doubt, fear, habit

he shows up at restaurants, gas stations as I am driving through town, moving forward

unshaven, lonely, serious, sad

mr. jones


If.you.are.more.of.an.artist.than.a.writer,.draw.a.picture.of.the.Saboteur.for.all.to.see..Better.yet,.go.for.both!.

my saboteur

WANTED saboteur continued

WANTED


ACTIVITY 6 future self

Imagine.meeting.yourself.20.years.from.now..Imagine.what.you.could.learn.and.how.remarkable.you.will.be!.this.person.is.your.Future.Self..We.can.meet.them.now.because.intuitively.we.already.know.them.–.we.just.need.to.bring.them.forth.through.a.simple.visualization..creating.a.future.self.vision.is.valuable.because.it.allows.you.to.speak.directly.to.this.person.and.find.out.what.they.did.to.get.to.such.a.strong,.happy,.fulfilled.place-.the.place.you.are.headed..

ROuND 1

engage.in.the.Future.Self.visualization..do.not.be.discouraged.if.you.don’t.have.a.distinct.and.fully.formed.picture..trust.yourself.and.the.process.and.see.what.happens..What.did.you.see?.how.did.it.feel?.Use.the.following.questions.to.solidify.the.vision.in.your.mind.

.

Describe the dwelling of your Future Self. What does it look like and where is it? What kind of landscape does it have?

What environment is it in? Are there trees? What kind? Etc.

What does your Future Self look like? What is his/her essence?

What does your Future Self remember about the last 20 years?

What do you need to be most aware of in order to make the journey from where you are today to where your Future Self is?


ACTIVITY 6 future self continued

ROuND 2

Break.into.twos.and.share.your.vision.with.your.partner..If.you.are.the.person.taking.in.the.other.person’s.story,.remember.to.use.your.powerful.questions.and.active.listening.from.your.Redwood.Arsenal.to.draw.out.as.much.of.your.partner’s.vision.as.possible..It’s.your.job.to.help.them.form.as.distinct.a.picture.as.they.can...

Your.Future.Self.is.a.key.component.of.your.Redwood.Board,.so.take.the.time.to.find.what.you.can.


RELATIONSHIPS

they.are.what.tie.us.together.and.have.a.huge.impact.on.our.ability.to.be.happy..Yet.despite.their.value,.some.of.our.most.important.relationships.are.not.given.the.simple.attention.they.require.and.we.end.up.not.getting.the.most.out.of.the.them..Not.nearly..time.for.a.new.approach.

SelFISh.GENEROSITYthis.is.all.about.you..Building.strong.relationships.makes.you.a.happier,.stronger.person..So.you.get.to.be.selfish.and.generous.at.the.same.time..

WHy CulTIvaTE RElaTIONSHIPS? IT’S COmmON KNOWlEDgE PROvEN By SCIENCE.

1..leSSoNS.FRom.dARWIN.Yes,.the.monkey.man.himself...human.beings.would.not.have.survived.without.creating.social.bonds...Groups.hunted,.protected.children.and.fought.off.enemies.toGetheR.

2..SocIAl.SUPPoRt.In.times.of.stress,.distress.and.trauma;.everything’s.easier.with.a.friend.

3..All.YoU.Need.IS.love.most.often,.it.is.relationships.which.create.our.first.experience.of.the.emotion.of.love.–.the.most.wildly.happiness.inducing.emotion.there.is..

4..leSS.hedoNISt.AdAPtAtIoN.Unlike.money,.our.desires.for.relationships.do.not.diminish.as.we.attain.them...Well,.that’s.good.news!

harry. harlow. (1974). separated. baby. monkeys..from. their. mothers. at. birth. (poor. monkeys!).and.gave.them.two.mothers.–.a.wire.one.which.dispensed.milk.and.a.soft.cuddly.one.made.of.terry.cloth.. .harlow.expected.them.to.become.attached.to.the.wire.one,.but.other.than.eating.from.it.they.spent.their.time.with.the.soft.cuddly.one.and.sought.shelter.behind.it.when.scared.

In.1965.he.raised.monkeys.completely.in.isolation.(again,. poor. monkeys!).. . After. a. year. without.interaction. with. other. monkeys. they. were.fearful,. withdrawn. and. exhibited. some. bizarre.behaviours. like. biting. themselves.. . the. good.news-.yes.there. is.some-.once.these.monkeys.were.mixed.with.other.young.monkeys.who.had.been.raised.in.a.normal.social.environment.they.begin. to. interact. normally. and. displayed. few.effects.from.their.earlier.isolation.

THE SCIENCE Of RElaTIONSHIPS


ACTIVITY 7 come togetherROuND 1

list.2-3.examples.of.important.relationships.in.your.life.under.each.header.

family.. . ........school friends

Now.pick.2.of.these.relationships.you’d.like.to.improve..one.or.both.of.your.parents.need.to.be.one.as.they.are.a.crucial.relationship.

a BETTER RElaTIONSHIP INvOlvES WORKINg ON ONE OR all Of a fEW SImPlE IDEaS. here’s.the.cool.part-.it.makes.you.feel.better.and.happier.too..

1.. mAke.tIme.talk.to.each.other….a.lot..2.. exPReSS.YoUR.AdmIRAtIoN,.APPRecIAtIoN.ANd.GRAtItUde.

communicate.it.directly..evoke.the.best.in.each.other..magic.ratio:.5.to.1.3.. cAPItAlIze.oN.Good.FoRtUNe.delight.in.their.windfalls.&.successes.4.. mANAGe.coNFlIct..

.

.

5.. ShARe.cultivate.and.support.shared.interests.and.goals.6.. Be.SUPPoRtIve.ANd.loYAl.Avoid.envy.and.fight.for.them.fiercely..7.. hUG.do.it.now!.do.it.often!.It’s.all.science.

•. voice.the.complaint.instead.of.a.criticism.•. Provide.an.opening.for.peace..Use.humour.and/or.affection.•. Be.aware.of.contempt.&.defensiveness.

mumdrew

dpdadbilly

blaire

katiepatrick

drama



ROuND 2

label.your..monkeys.with.2.people.with.whom.you.have.relationships.you.want.to.improve..Now.feed.those.monkeys!..Which.of.the.7.relationship.building.techniques.are.best.suited.for.each.monkey?..Pick.at.least.2.for.each.

ROuND 3

commitment.–.it’s.always.easier.once.you.say.it.out.loud...Find.the.theme.around.your.bananas.and.complete.the.following.pledge..think.about.the.good.choices.you’ll.need.to.make.

my PlEDgEI’m SayINg “yES” TO _________________ BECauSE I Say “NO” TO _______________.

mONKEy 1: mONKEy 2: mum katie

admiration & appreciation

admiration & appreciation

manage conflict

sharemake time

make time daily grind & ingratitude

hug

be supportive & loyal

be supportive & loyal


We.pull.our.Power.from.different.places..Understand.the.engine.that.drives.you.

a REDWOOD fRamEWORK

.

.

. .THE POWER SOuRCES

aPPly THESE POWER SOuRCES TO

POWER sources

identify character strengths & values deploy in

signature ways

choicesemotions

the present actions

personalphysical

relationships& purpose

ritual

body instincts

language

willstyle fun

enduring happinessmONKEy 1: mONKEy 2:


YoU’ve.comPleted.the.elemeNtS.RetReAt..CONGRATULATIONS.

You.will.form.a.band.and.this.group.will.become.your.team.for.the.rest.of.the.Redwood.Project..together.you.will.work.your.way.through.4.Redwood.Sessions,.each.exploring.one.component.of.the.Be.me.Philosophy.

You.will.also.be.engaging.in.3.1:1.check.Ins.–.these.are.conversations.with.the.Project.leader..In.these.conversations.you.will.be.tailoring.your.RAP.and.making.it.specific.to.YoU..

Not.only.will.you.write.out.your.RAP.in.the.subsequent.weeks.after.elements,.you.will.also.fill.out.the.remaining.pieces.of.your.RedWood.BoARd..take.a.look.at.it.on.the.next.page.

WHAT’S next

BBIG CHOICES

EEMOTIONAL FUEL

MMOMENT MASTERY

EEVERYDAY ACTION

now It’s tIme towrite your rap.


REDWOOD scheduler

take.a.moment.now.to.make.sure.you.understand.the.schedule.ahead..Anyone.from.the.Redwood.team.will.be.happy.to.help.

THE DaTES fOR my 3 1:1 CHECK INS my 4 REDWOOD SESSIONS

#1 check in big choicesmarch 8th 4pm -5pm

february 27th 6pm -9pm

march 20th 6pm -9pm

april 10th 6pm -9pm

april 24th 6pm -9pm

march 29th 4pm -5pm

march 19th 4pm -5pm

#2 check inemotional fuel

#3 check inmoment mastery

everyday action


REDWOODBoARd

your story

The Redwood Board is a living, breathing testament to the story you are writing. This is a picture of you that is both a celebration and roadmap. Take a look at the sneak peak here. Over the course of writing your RAP, we will be filling in a poster size version of your Board so you can share it and display it with pride.


CHARA

CT

ER

STYLE

JOY

GR

AT

ITU

DE

SE

RE

NIT

YIN

TE

RE

ST

INS

PIR

AT

ION

LOV

EP

RID

EA

MU

SE

ME

NT

HO

PE

AW

E

PE

RS

ON

AL

STA

TE

ME

NT

MY

VA

LUE

S

MY

VO

IDS

RO

LE

S

MY

HA

PP

INE

SS

MY

FU

TU

RE

SE

LF &

ULT

IMA

TE

VIS

ION

1YEARGOALS

MY

RE

SO

UR

CE

S

BIG

BA

DM

ISS

ION

BH

AG

before redw

ood

average

after redw

ood

PEAKEXPERIENCE

CH

AL

LE

NG

EDIF

FU

SE

RL

AN

DM

INE

SEEKER

SA

BE

TE

UR

name:

style:

technique:

WO

RL

DC

UP

O

FYO

U

when i live my values i am:

it lets me be:

HA

PP

INE

SS

M

YT

HS

canadian happiness score

666

family

work

funpersonal

1

24 35

SIG

NA

TU

RE

ST

RE

NG

TH

S

do my choices support these?

1

24 35

REDWOODBoARd

redwood-project: guidebook

Documents

redwood project arsenal

redwood board

members guidebookthe

biggest risk

b e r g u i d e b o

members guidebook416

happiness definition

happiness breakdown