reinvigorating writing booklet - english teacher guru ·...

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© L & E Williams Holdings Pty Ltd, 2012 1 Reinvigorating the Teaching of Writing: Nurturing Organisation, Accuracy & Flair Presented by Lindsay Williams Aims To explore a wholeschool framework for writing improvement To discuss critically popular writing pedagogies To consider implications of this framework for participants’ schools To provide a basis for future school improvement and professional plans Outline Anticipatory Set: Literacyrich schools Aims, outline and preliminary comments An overview of the framework Exploring the framework in detail (see below) Conclusion: Where to from here? Anticipatory set Read one of the vignettes provided. Choose one appropriate to your context (primary, middle or senior schooling). Using the retrieval chart below, reflect on how this vignette matches with your own experiences in your school. What do we do? What don’t we do? What would I like to see happening?

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Page 1: Reinvigorating Writing booklet - English Teacher Guru · ©L"&EWilliams"Holdings"PtyLtd,"2012" 1" ReinvigoratingtheTeachingofWriting:+NurturingOrganisation,+ Accuracy+&Flair" Presented+by+Lindsay+Williams+

©  L  &  E  Williams  Holdings  Pty  Ltd,  2012   1  

Reinvigorating  the  Teaching  of  Writing:  Nurturing  Organisation,  Accuracy  &  Flair  

Presented  by  Lindsay  Williams  

Aims  • To  explore  a  whole-­‐school  framework  for  writing  improvement  • To  discuss  critically  popular  writing  pedagogies  • To  consider  implications  of  this  framework  for  participants’  schools    • To  provide  a  basis  for  future  school  improvement  and  professional  plans  

Outline  • Anticipatory  Set:    Literacy-­‐rich  schools  • Aims,  outline  and  preliminary  comments  • An  overview  of  the  framework  • Exploring  the  framework  in  detail  (see  below)  • Conclusion:  Where  to  from  here?  

Anticipatory  set  Read  one  of  the  vignettes  provided.  Choose  one  appropriate  to  your  context  (primary,  middle  or  senior  schooling).  Using  the  retrieval  chart  below,  reflect  on  how  this  vignette  matches  with  your  own  experiences  in  your  school.    What  do  we  do?   What  don’t  we  do?   What  would  I  like  to  

see  happening?                          

                                 

 

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©  L  &  E  Williams  Holdings  Pty  Ltd,  2012   2  

Model  for  Writing  Improvement    

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©  L  &  E  Williams  Holdings  Pty  Ltd,  2012   3  

A  Critical  Examination  of  the  Writing  Process The  following  is  taken  from:  Graves,  D.  (1983).  Writing:  teachers  and  children  at  work.  London:  Heinemann.  pp.  119-­‐123.    

Wepins  by  Gregory    

Ther  are  mny  kds  uv  wepins  ther  are  had  grnad  shotrs  bazuks  flame  thrs  an  mines  if  you  rnt  carefull  they  can  kil  the  gy  that  has  thm  if  you  pull  a  pen  on  the  grana  you  hav  to  thrw  it  quk  or  it  will  blooenup  in  yr  had    [Translation:  There  are  many  kinds  of  weapons  there  are  hand  grenade  shooters  bazookers  flame  throwers  and  mines  if  you  aren’t  careful  they  can  kill  the  guy  that  has  them  if  you  pull  a  pin  on  the  grenade  you  have  to  throw  it  quick  or  it  will  blow  up  in  your  hand]    What  advice  would  you  give  to  this  student?  

Transcript  One:  Graves-­‐style  Writing  Conference    Conference  1  (40  seconds)    Teacher:   How  is  it  going  Greg?    Greg:     Good.    Teacher:   Tell  me  about  it.    Greg:   Well,  these  weapons  will  kill  you  if  you  don’t  look  out.  Some  guys  

forget  when  they  pull  the  pin  and  stand  there  like  dopes.  It  just  blows  their  heads  off.  What  a  mess!  Other  guys  get  killed  too.  

 Teacher:   I  see.  You  do  have  to  watch  out  for  that,  don’t  you?  And  what  will  you  

be  doing  with  this  piece  next?    Greg:     Well,  they  used  these  to  kill  Germans  and  I  want  to  put  that  in.    Teacher:   Fine,  go  to  it.    Conference  3  -­  Final  (4  minutes)    Teacher:   How  is  your  writing  coming,  Greg?    Greg:     Terrific.  It’s  the  best.    Teacher:   This  is  one  of  your  good  ones?    Greg:   Yup,  nobody  knows  more’n  me  about  weapons.  My  grandfather  has  

lots  of  weapons.    Teacher:   Would  you  read  the  piece  to  me  so  far?         (Greg  reads  the  piece.)    

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©  L  &  E  Williams  Holdings  Pty  Ltd,  2012   4  

Teacher:   Well,  you  can  read  it  very  well,  Greg.  And  there  is  a  lot  about  weapons  in  there,  the  bazookas,  flamethrowers.  You’ve  tried  to  spell  some  pretty  hard  words  too  –  grenade,  bazooka,  blow  up.  What’s  the  next  thing  you’re  going  to  do  with  this?  

Greg:   I’d  like  to  get  it  published.  I  think  the  other  kids  will  be  interested  in  weapons.  

 Teacher:   Do  you  think  this  is  ready  to  get  published?    Greg:     Yup.    Teacher:   As  it  is  now,  why  do  you  think  it  is  ready  to  be  published?  Convince  

me  that  it  is  ready  to  go  as  it  is.    

Greg:     Well,  I  know  some  of  the  words  aren’t  right,  but  I  can’t  spell  ‘em.    Teacher:   I  can  help  with  that.  There  are  some  important  words  here  that  I’d  

like  to  see  you  underline  for  help.  When  you  want  help  with  a  word  later  for  publishing,  just  underline  it.  I  have  another  problem,  Greg,  if  I’m  going  to  publish  it.  I  can’t  tell  where  some  of  your  information  begins  and  ends.  I’d  like  you  to  read  it  aloud  again  so  we  can  mark  it  off  with  some  periods  and  capitals;  so  I  can  tell  what  you  want  to  go  together.  

 (Greg  reads  his  piece  aloud  with  the  teacher  putting  capital  at  the  beginnings  and  periods  where  he  pauses  for  meaning  units.  She  then  asks  Greg  to  reread,  using  the  markers  she  has  put  in,  to  see  if  this  is  the  way  he  wishes  the  information  to  sound.)  

Transcript  Two  A  fourth  grade  lesson  introducing  research  skills  for  the  first  time.  Students  are  not  currently  studying  monkeys.      Turn   Speaker   Transcript  1   Teacher   Today  we’re  learning  how  to  find  information  quickly  where  we  don’t  

have  to  read  everything  in  the  book.  Are  you  looking  at  me?  Think  about  it.  But  we  do  need  to  find  information  quickly  and  one  good  way  to  do  it  is  to  read  the  first  sentence  of  each  paragraph.  You  know  paragraphs  don’t  you?  The  first  sentence  of  each  paragraph.  I  think  that’s  what  we’re  required  to  do  in  that  very  first  question  ((uncovers  first  question  on  OHT)).  Now  you  look  hard  and  read  the  first  question  for  me.  

2   Students   How  many  species  of  monkeys  are  there?  3   Teacher   Look  hard  at  your  page  now.  Look  at  the  first  sentence  of  a  paragraph.  

When  you’ve  found  it  put  your  hand  high  ((raises  and  lowers  hand,  watches  students  as  they  read  for  10  seconds  and  then  raise  their  hands)).  You  don’t  tell  anyone  else  what  to  do  ((walking  over  to  two  students  talking)).  Let  them  find  it  themselves.  ((To  class))  Number  your  answer  sheet  in  your  computer  book.  Find  a  nice  clean  space.  It’s  question  one  so  we  put  one.  Would  you  like  to  put  the  heading,  Monkey?  

4   Student   ((calling  out  quietly))  No.  5   Student   ((calling  out))  What  about  the  card  number?    

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©  L  &  E  Williams  Holdings  Pty  Ltd,  2012   5  

 6   Teacher   Thank  you.  Never  mind  about  the  card  number  just  Monkey  will  do  

nicely.  7   Student   ((calling  out))  Miss  8   Teacher   Yes  ((walks  over  to  student))  9   Student   Are  we  going  to  do  the  ones  we  were  doing  this  morning?  10   Teacher   We’re  busy  doing  this  now  Sam.  11   Student   ((calling  out))  Miss  will  I  rub  the  words  off  the  blackboard?  12   Teacher   No  thank  you  Jason  ((to  class))  Now,  your  answer.  13   Student   ((calling  out))  There.  14   Teacher   Ah  Ah  ((shaking  head)).  Just  write  it  down,  I’m  coming  to  see  it.  ((Walks  

around  room.))  I’d  like  a  word  after  that  number.  To  really  answer  the  question  well,  we  need  a  naming  word.  ((Bends  down  to  point  at  student’s  work))  That’s  too  small.  ((To  class))  Some  people  think  we’re  doing  long  answers  and  they’re  doing  sentences.  Today  children  we’re  doing  short  answers.  What  are  we  after?  

15   Students   ((class  chorus))  Short  answers.  16   Teacher   A  short  answer.  You’re  really  trying  hard  to  make  beautiful  sentences,  

but  I  need  a  short  answer.  ((Walks  around  class  watching  students  for  32  seconds,  finishes  at  front  of  class.)  Pencils  down.  Hands  away.  Look  up  at  me.  ((Students  carry  out  instructions  immediately.))  I  notice  some  people,  I  noticed  that  some  people  were  writing  the  whole  sentence,  just  copying  out  the  words  from  the  encyclopaedia.  Now  that’s  not  what  I  want.  We  need  to  copy  some  words  but  not  all  of  them.  A  short  answer  does  not  have  to  be  a  sentence.  So  what  did  you  write  please  Mary?  

17   Mary   There  are  about  two  hundred  species  of  monkey.  18   Teacher   Ye-­‐es.  All  right.  That’s  a  good,  that’s  an  answer.  But  you  wrote  ((Points  to  

another  student.))  19   Student   Two  hundred  species  of  monkeys.  20   Teacher   Two  hundred  species  of  monkeys.  

A  (Partial  and  Simple)  Continuum  of  Writing  Pedagogy                        “Mystical  Osmosis”  or  “Just  Do  It”  

     Writing  Process  (e.g.  Graves  1983)    Writer’s  Workshop  (via  Graves)    

                     Providing  an  annotated  exemplar  

                 Writer’s  Workshop  +  Explicit  Teaching    

    Write  it  Right  Teaching-­‐Learning  Cycle  (Rothery  1994)    Literacy  Development  Cycle  (Unsworth  2001)    Scaffolding  Literacy  (Harders,  Axford  &  Wise  2009)    

               Reading  to  Learn  (Martin  &  Rose  2012)  

Implicit                   Explicit      

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©  L  &  E  Williams  Holdings  Pty  Ltd,  2012   6  

Context-­‐Text  Relationships      

    In  addition  to  the  field  (i.e.  topic  or  subject  matter)  and  mode  (written,  spoken,  visual,  gestural  and  auditory),  differences  among  texts  can  be  accounted  for  in  terms  of  three  interpersonal  factors  (or  tenor  variables):    

1. Contact/Familiarity,  i.e.  close  (‘affiliated’)    distant  (‘unaffiliated’)  –  as  determined  by  the  principles  of  proliferation  and  contraction.  In  other  words,  the  closer  we  are  to  someone,  the  more  choices  we  have  in  an  exchange  and  the  less  we  have  to  say  in  order  to  be  understood.  

 Distant   Close  Mr  Newman,  Premier  (choices  restricted)  

Campbell,  Can-­‐Do,  Mate,  Darling,  Darl,  BFF,  Cam  

Wave,  handshake   Enthusiastic  wave,  handshake  with  hand  on  elbow,  hug,  kiss,  pat  

 continued  over  page…/  

Genre  &  purpose:  A  type  of  text  that  uses  language  to  achieve  a  particular  social  purpose  or  achieve  a  goal.  The  purpose  is  achieved  in  a  distinct  series  of  stages  

(or  steps).  

Register:  Field  (social  activity  and  related  subject  matter);  

Tenor  (roles  and  relationships);  Mode  (linguistic,  visual,  gestural,  

audio,  spatial  or  some  combination)  

Language:  specipic  features  of  the  relevant  mode  or  modes    

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©  L  &  E  Williams  Holdings  Pty  Ltd,  2012   7  

2. Status/Power,  i.e.  equal    unequal  –  as  determined  by  the  principle  of  reciprocity.  In  other  words,  if  people  are  equal  in  power,  they  will  have  the  ability  to  reciprocate.  

 Allowable   Probably  not  allowed  Teacher:  Good  morning,  Sam.  Sam:  Good  morning,  Mr  Williams.  

Teacher:  Good  morning,  Sam.  Sam:  Good  morning,  Lindsay.  

Teacher  mussing  up  Sam’s  hair.   Sam  mussing  up  the  teacher’s  hair.    

Power  is  signalled  via  reciprocity  of:  i. Status:  tenor  (social  hierarchy)  ii. Prominence:  mode  (publicity)  iii. Authority:  field  (expertise,  classification,  knowledge)  iv. Control:  genre  (skill,  manipulation)  v. Power:  ideology  (access)  

 3. Value  system  (Axiology),  i.e.  aligned    not  aligned    

Alignment  is  signalled  via  reference  to:  i. Logic  (true/false)  ii. Ethics  (good/bad)  iii. Morals  (right/wrong)  iv. Norms  (appropriate/inappropriate)  v. Sense  (like/dislike)  

 (After  Don  2011)  

Bloom’s Taxonomy and Writing  Things  you  might  do  based  on  the  modified  Bloom’s  Taxonomy:  

Remember:  Name  the  features  of  a  piece  of  writing   Understand:  Summarise  the  critical  features   Apply:  Use  these  to  mimic  an  exemplar  text   Analyse:  Identify  factors  and  features  that  differentiate  one  text  from  

another   Evaluate:  Choose  the  best  genre,  structure  and  deployment  of  features  for  a  

new  context  and  be  able  to  justify  these  (getting  meta…);  Judge  the  effectiveness  and  appropriateness  of  a  text  

Create:  Design  and  create  a  new  text  for  an  unknown  context    

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©  L  &  E  Williams  Holdings  Pty  Ltd,  2012   8  

Extract  from  Task  Sheet  (Art)      

Brief  description  of  task  The  executives  of  a  new  animated  movie,  ‘The  Darkened  World’,  require  strange  creatures  for  the  main  characters.  You  have  been  invited  to  submit  a  concept  drawing.    

Context  in  which  you  are  to  write/speak/perform  Genre  and  purpose:    

Fantasy  image  to  create,  stimulate  and  entertain  

Subject  matter  What  is  the  assignment  about?  

The  brief  from  the  studio  includes  the  following  requirements:  

The  creature  must  seem  to  have  defied  evolution  and,  therefore,  must  not  look  like  any  creature  already  on  earth.  

It  could  look  like  quite  a  few  other  creatures,  with  parts  from  different  animals,  birds,  amphibians,  insects,  arachnids  etc.  

In  the  script,  the  creature  will  catch  it  prey,  devour  it  and  have  a  means  of  defence.  

The  creature  emerges  from  the  centre  of  the  earth  and  is  able  to  camouflage  itself.    

 Draw  a  suitable  landscape  and  superimpose  the  creature  on  it.      

Roles  and  relationships  Who  are  you?  Who  is  your  audience?  What  relationships  are  you  trying  to  establish?  

You  are  the  artist  interested  in  experimenting  with  a  range  of  elements  and  media  of  art.  You  are  also  interested  in  raising  your  profile  and  making  money  –  so  you  want  to  win  this  job.    Your  audience  will  be  studio  executives  who  have  more  power  than  you  and  are  only  reasonably  familiar  with  you  and  your  work.    Make  sure  your  creature  fits  with  their  vision  for  this  movie.    You’ll  have  to  really  stun  them  with  a  final  drawing  that  is  professionally  presented.  

Mode   Drawing  Medium  How  is  the  assignment  to  be  presented?  

Create  the  initial  animals  on  A5  paper  in  your  Visual  Diary.  Use  different  wet  or  dry  media  for  each  animal,  e.g.:  

HB,  2B  or  6B  pencil   coloured  pencils   conte   charcoal   pastel   fine  tipped  pen  and  ink   mixed  media.  

Combine  the  animals  using  a  piece  of  A3  paper.  

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Digestive  System  Texts    From  http://digestive.niddk.nih.gov/ddiseases/pubs/yrdd/:  The  digestive  system  is  made  up  of  the  digestive  tract—a  series  of  hollow  organs  joined  in  a  long,  twisting  tube  from  the  mouth  to  the  anus—and  other  organs  that  help  the  body  break  down  and  absorb  food  (see  figure).    from  Horrible  Science:  After  a  few  hours  I  managed  to  squeeze  through  the  exit  below  the  stomach.  I  found  myself  in  a  long  tube  that  looked  like  a  subway.  I  switched  on  my  headlamps  and  peered  at  my  waterproof  map.  My  route  was  clear.  I  should  head  down  the  duodenum  (dew-­‐o-­‐dee-­‐num),  jejunum  (gee-­‐june-­‐num)  and  ileum  (ill-­‐ee-­‐um).  Whatever  they  were.  The  map  said  ‘small  intestines’  –  but  it  seemed  endless.  I  knew  I  had  to  keep  moving.  The  gut  walls  were  closing  behind  me  and  I  wasn’t  hanging  around  to  get  squashed  again.  So  I  walked.  My  feet  squashed  on  the  soft,  rubbery  ground.  Just  then  I  saw  something  large  and  blue  trapped  in  a  fold  in  the  wall.  Success!  It  was  the  missing  pen  top.  I  gingerly  pulled  it  out  and  tucked  it  under  my  arm.  Now  all  I  had  to  do  was  to  get  out  without  getting  digested  on  the  way…      From  www.vivo.colostate.edu/hbooks/pathphys/digestion/smallgut/index.html:  The  small  intestine  is  the  portal  for  absorption  of  virtually  all  nutrients  into  blood.  Accomplishing  this  transport  entails  breaking  down  large  supramolecular  aggregates  into  small  molecules  that  can  be  transported  across  the  epithelium.  An  exception  to  this  statement  is  seen  in  herbivores,  where  large  amounts  of  short  chain  fatty  acids  are  absorbed  at  other  sites.      By  the  time  ingesta  reaches  the  small  intestine,  foodstuffs  have  been  mechanically  broken  down  and  reduced  to  a  liquid  by  mastication  and  grinding  in  the  stomach.  Once  within  the  small  intestine,  these  macromolecular  aggregates  are  exposed  to  pancreatic  enzymes  and  bile,  which  enables  digestion  to  molecules  capable  or  almost  capable  of  being  absorbed.  The  final  stages  of  digestion  occur  on  the  surface  of  the  small  intestinal  epithelium.      The  net  effect  of  passage  through  the  small  intestine  is  absorption  of  most  of  the  water  and  electrolytes  (sodium,  chloride,  potassium)  and  essentially  all  dietary  organic  molecules  (including  glucose,  amino  acids  and  fatty  acids).  Through  these  activities,  the  small  intestine  not  only  provides  nutrients  to  the  body,  but  plays  a  critical  role  in  water  and  acid-­‐base  balance.      

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Genre  Map    

 

Genres  and  Types  of  Knowledge    

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Genres  and  Stages  

 

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The  Oral-­‐Literate  Continuum  

Continuum   Example   Features  

Most  spoken  –  oral  

language  1  

Visigoths  engaged  in  the  sacking  of  Rome:  “Ahhh!  Take  that!  Ughh!”  

Action  only  

2   What  two  Visigoths  said  to  each  other  in  the  heat  of  battle:    “Hey  Waldemar,  here’s  a  neat  statue.    Let’s  bust  it.”  

Language  embedded  in  the  action:    exophoric  retrieval  (i.e.  outside  of  the  text),  specific  reference,  present  tense,  individual  participants,  vocatives,  imperative  &  declarative  mood  (commands  and  statements).    

3   A  Roman  watching  the  battle  &  telling  his  blind  grandmother  what  was  happening:  “Well  Gran,  there’s  a  whole  bunch  of  Visigoths  down  there,  big  blond  guys,  horns  on  their  hats  and  they’re  busting  all  the  statues  and  stuff.    

Language  constructing  the  action:  exophoric  retrieval,  specific  reference,  present  tense,  individual  participants,  vocatives,  declarative  mood  (statements).  

4   A  group  of  Visigoths  reminiscing  around  the  campfire  the  night  after  the  battle:  “Man,  you  should  have  seen  Waldemar  when  he  busted  the  statue.    He  totally  trashed  it.    When  its  head  flew  off  it  nearly  wasted  Eric.”    

Language  reconstructing  the  action:  specific  reference,  past  tense,  individual  participants,  vocatives,  declarative  mood.  

5   A  report  of  the  sacking  in  the  next  day’s  newspaper:  “Almost  the  entire  city  was  devastated  in  the  raid  by  marauding  Visigoths  on  Thursday.”    

Language  reconstructing  the  action,  but  from  a  greater  semiotic  distance  than  4:  generic  reference,  past  tense,  collective  participants,  declarative  mood.  

6   An  explanation  of  why  Rome  fell:  “The  fall  of  Rome  can  be  attributed  to  a  number  of  factors.”    

Language  interpreting  the  action:  non-­‐human  (nominalized)  participants,  present  tense,  passive  voice,  declarative  mood.  

Most  written  –  literate  

language  7  

A  work  on  imperialism  using  Rome  as  an  example:  “While  imperialism  is  an  enduring  ideology,  the  tendency  is  for  empires  not  to  endure.    For  example,  Rome  ...”    

Language  interpreting  the  action,  but  from  a  greater  semiotic  distance:  abstract  (nominalized)  participants,  generic  reference,  present  tense,  declarative  mood.  

 Adapted  from  a  diagram  by  Garry  Collins  (original  source  unknown)      

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Identifying  Stages  and  Phases  of  a  Text    Stages   Phases   Text  

   Chocolate  is  eaten  by  millions  of  people  around  the  world  and  its  sale  is  worth  billions  and  billions  of  dollars  every  year.  Recently,  though,  debate  has  raged  in  Australia  about  whether  children  should  be  banned  from  being  able  to  purchase  or  consume  this  delicious  treat.  So,  is  this  an  over-­‐reaction  to  the  growing  hysteria  surrounding  childhood  obesity  or  a  long  over-­‐due  precaution  to  protect  the  health  of  vulnerable  members  of  the  community?  Alternatively,  perhaps  a  sensible  compromise  is  required?  Let  us  explore  some  of  arguments.  

   For  many  years  now,  respected  medical  experts  have  reported  on  the  negative  health  effects  of  an  over-­‐indulgence  in  chocolate.  Milk  chocolate,  in  particular,  can  be  very  high  in  fat.  If  too  much  is  eaten  over  a  period  of  time,  children’s  weight  balloons  –  especially  if  their  exercise  is  limited  and  they  consume  other,  fatty  fast  foods,  such  as  French  fries,  sundaes  and  soft  drinks.  Moreover,  a  clear  link  has  been  established  between  obesity  and  a  range  of  serious  health  issues,  including  heart  attack  and  diabetes.  Despite  these  problems,  however,  medical  experts  have  also  discovered  that  the  moderate  consumption  of  dark  chocolate  may  actually  have  health  benefits,  including  the  prevention  of  heart  attacks.  In  addition,  chocolate  is  believed  to  help  raise  people’s  happiness  levels  and  can  play  a  part  in  relieving  stress  and  depression.      Some  well-­‐meaning  human  rights  advocates  have  also  argued  that  the  production  of  chocolate  causes  suffering  for  many  people  in  the  developing  world.  In  particular,  in  west  Africa  where  most  of  the  world’s  cocoa  beans  (a  crucial  ingredient  in  chocolate)  are  grown,  it  is  alleged  that  young  children  are  forced  into  slave  labour.  Western  chocolate  companies  have  been  accused  of  adding  to  the  problem  by  paying  farmers  very  little  for  their  beans.  On  the  other  hand,  while  these  claims  may  be  true,  we  must  acknowledge  that  increasingly  these  companies  are  using  fair  trade  chocolate  that  helps  reduce  the  severity  of  the  problems  and  is  gradually  improving  the  life  of  the  cocoa  farmers.  A  question  also  must  be  asked:  how  will  banning  chocolate  for  children  alone  solve  any  of  these  problems?  In  fact,  if  the  amount  of  chocolate  eaten  decreases,  then  that  might  actually  mean  less  money  for  struggling  African  farmers  and  their  long-­‐suffering  families.  

 

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Stages  and  Phases  of  a  Text  continued…    

   In  conclusion,  there  may  be  strong  reasons  for  considering  a  ban,  but  there  are  even  stronger  reasons  for  opposing  one.  Nobody  wants  to  encourage  childhood  obesity,  cause  serious  health  problems  for  children  or  contribute  to  the  suffering  of  cocoa  farmers  and  their  children.  Similarly,  surely  no  one  wants  to  destroy  an  industry  that  brings  a  huge  amount  of  pleasure,  makes  billions  of  dollars  a  year  and  employs  thousands  of  people.  Instead,  a  sensible  compromise  is  needed:  children  must  be  educated  about  the  dangers  of  obesity  and  encouraged  to  exercise;  everyone  (including  adults)  needs  to  eat  in  moderation,  remembering  that  chocolate  is  a  once-­‐in-­‐a-­‐while-­‐food;  and  finally,  consumers  need  to  contact  their  favourite  chocolate  manufacturers  and  encourage  their  use  of  fair  trade  cocoa.  A  total  ban  will  achieve  absolutely  nothing.    

R2L  Joint  Writing  Transcript    Teacher   Prepare   Now  we  need  to  preview  the  side  we  support.     Focus   First  we  need  a  conjunction  that  tells  the  reader  this  

is  the  other  side.  Student   Propose   On  the  other  hand.  Teacher   Affirm   Brilliant.  [scribes  ‘on  the  other  hand’]     Focus   And  we  can  just  say  other  think.  But  we  need  a  verb  

that  means  thinking  carefully.  Students   Propose   Know.  Understand.  Examine.  Analyse.  Teacher   Affirm   Great.  [scribing  notes]     Elaborate   Another  verb  that  means  thinking  carefully  is  

consider  [adds  to  notes]     Focus   So  let’s  say  others  consider.  [pointing  at  notes]  

What’s  our  sentence  going  to  be?  [student  name]?  Student   Propose   Others  consider  it  is  unhealthy,  bad  for  the  

environment,  and  manipulates.  Teacher   Affirm   Excellent.     Elaborate   Let’s  say  the  advertising  is  manipulative.  [scribes  

‘others  consider  it  to  be  unhealthy,  bad  for  the  environment,  and  its  advertising  manipulative.’]  

 From  Martin  and  Rose  2012:  209  

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Writing  Plan  (after  Harders,  Axford  &  Wise  2009)    Original  text   The  writer…   Your  attempt  For  many  years  now,  respected  medical  experts  have  reported  on  the  negative  health  effects  of  an  over-­‐indulgence  in  chocolate.    

states  the  first  argument  (negative  point)  in  a  topic  sentence.  

 

Milk  chocolate,  in  particular,  can  be  very  high  in  fat.    

exemplifies  the  negative  point.  

       

If  too  much  is  eaten  over  a  period  of  time,  children’s  weight  balloons  –  especially  if  their  exercise  is  limited  and  they  consume  other,  fatty  fast  foods,  such  as  French  fries,  sundaes  and  soft  drinks.  Moreover,  a  clear  link  has  been  established  between  obesity  and  a  range  of  serious  health  issues,  including  heart  attack  and  diabetes.    

elaborates  on  the  example,  showing  cause  and  effects.  

 

Despite  these  problems,  however,  medical  experts  have  also  discovered  that  the  moderate  consumption  of  dark  chocolate  may  actually  have  health  benefits,  including  the  prevention  of  heart  attacks.    

counters  with  a  positive  argument  and  example.  

 

In  addition,  chocolate  is  believed  to  help  raise  people’s  happiness  levels  and,  therefore,  can  play  a  part  in  relieving  stress  and  depression.    

adds  another  positive  example,  including  elaboration.  

 

 

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Sentence  Making    Mentor  Sentence  (broken  into  word  groups)  

Structure  (non-­technical)  

Structure  (technical  terms)  

New  sentence  using  the  same  pattern  

For  many  years  now,    

A  length  of  time   Prepositional  phrase  of  time  

     

respected  medical  experts    

people  with  expertise  

noun  group        

have  reported     spoke  or  reported   past  tense  saying/reporting  verbs    

     

on  the  negative  health  effects  of  an  over-­‐indulgence  in  chocolate.    

on/about  something  

preposition  +  noun  group  

 

References  Axford,  B.,  Harders,  P.  &  Wise,  F.  (2009).  Scaffolding  Literacy.  Victoria:  ACER  Press.  Christie,  F.  &  Martin,  J.  R.  (2008).  Language,  Knowledge  and  Pedagogy.  London:  Continuum.  Culican,  S.J.  (2006).  Learning  to  Read:Reading  to  Learn:  A  Middle  Years  Literacy  Intervention  

Research  Project,  Final  Report  2003-­4.  Catholic  Education  Office  Melbourne  http://www.cecv.melb.catholic.edu.au/  Research  and  Seminar  Papers.  Retrieved  17  October  2009  from  http://www.readingtolearn.com.au/#/articles/.  

Don,  A.  (2011).  ‘Legitimating  tenor  relationships:  Affiliation  and  alignment  in  written  interaction’.  Linguistics  and  the  human  sciences,  5:  3,  303-­‐327.  

Fisher,  D.,  Frey,  N.  and  Lapp,  D.  (2009).  In  a  Reading  State  of  Mind:  Brain  Research,  Teacher  Modelling  and  Comprehension  Instruction.  Newark,  Delaware:  International  Reading  Association.    

Hollimon,  D.  (2011).  It’s  simple:  Read  more,  write  more,  teach  vocabulary.  Reading  Today.  Vol  28:  4.  p13.  

Irvin,  J.,  Meltzer,  J.,  Dean,  N.  and  Mickler,  M.  (2010).  Taking  the  lead  on  adolescent  literacy:  Action  steps  for  schoolwide  success.  USA:  Corwin  and  the  International  Reading  Association.    

Martin,  J.  R.  &  Rose,  D.  (2008).  Genre  Relations:  Mapping  Culture.  London:  Eqinox.  Misson,  R.  (2004)  What  are  we  creating  in  creative  writing?.  English  in  Australia.  21.  32-­‐40.  OECD  (2010).  PISA  2009  results:  Overcoming  social  background-­  Equity  in  learning  

opportunities  and  outcomes  (Volume  II).  http://dx.doi.org/10.1787/9789264091504-­‐en.    OECD  (2010).  PISA  2009  results:  Learning  to  learn  –  student  engagement,  strategies  and  

practices  (Vol  III).  http://dx.doi.org/10.1787/9789264083943-­‐en.  Parris,  S.,  Fisher,  D.  and  Headley,  K.    (eds)  (2009).    Adolescent  Literacy,  Field  Tested:  Effective  

Solutions  for  Every  Classroom.  Newark,  Delaware:  International  Reading  Association.    Unsworth,  L.  (2001).  Teaching  multiliteracies  across  the  curriculum:  Changing  contexts  of  

text  and  image  in  classroom  practice.  Buckingham:  Open  University  Press.  Wilhelm,  J.  (2007).  Engaging  readers  and  writers  with  enquiry:  Promoting  deep  

understandings  in  Language  Arts  and  the  content  areas  with  guiding  questions.  USA:  Scholastic.  

Wright,  D.  &  Mahiri,  J.  (2012).  Literacy  learning  within  community  action  projects  for  social  change.  Journal  of  Adolescent  &  Adult  Literacy.  56:  2.  Pp.  123-­‐131.  

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Appendix  One:  Common  letter  patterns  (Axford,  Harders  and  Wise,  2009)    Double  vowels  ai  oa  

au  oi  

ea  oo  

ee  ou  

ei  ue  

ie  ui  

Vowel  +  consonant  sound  aw   ay   ew   ow   oy    Double  consonants  ch  bb  mm  ck  

gh  cc  nn    

ph  dd  pp  

sh  ff  rr  

th  gg  ss  

wh  ll  zz  

Vowel  plus  ‘r’  ar   er   ir   or   ur    Silent  letters  gn   kn   mb   ten   wr    Word  endings  al  ied  y  

ed  ion  

en  ing  

er  le  

es  ly  

est  s  

Blends:  Onset  rhymes  bl  fr  scr  spl  thr  

br  gl  sk  spr  tr  

cl  gr  sl  squ  tw  

cr  pl  sm  st    

dr  pr  sn  str  

fl  sc  sp  sw  ex  

Blends:  Final  ct  mp  sk  

ft  nd  st  

ld  nk  sp  

lk  ng  

lp  nt  

lt  pt  

‘e’  marker  a-­‐e  -­‐ge  

e-­‐e   i-­‐e   o-­‐e   u-­‐e   -­‐ce  

Longer  letter  patterns  alk  igh  

augh  ough  

ear  ould  

eigh  our  

ess  tion  

ful  ound  

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Appendix  2:  A  selection  of  English  prefixes  and  suffixes  (adapted  from  Crystal,  1995)  

Prefix    Meaning  group   Prefix   Examples  Negation   a-­‐,  dis-­‐,  in-­‐,    non-­‐,  un-­‐   atheist;  disobey;  

incomplete;  nonsmoker;  unwise  

Reversal   De-­‐,  dis-­‐,  un-­‐   Defrost;  disinfect;  undo    Disparaging   Mal-­‐,  mis-­‐,  pseudo-­‐   malfunction;  mislead;  

pseudo-­‐intellectual  Size  or  degree   Arch-­‐,  co-­‐,  hyper-­‐,  mega-­‐,  

mini-­‐,  out-­‐,  over-­‐,  sub-­‐,  super-­‐,  sur-­‐,  ultra-­‐,  under-­‐,  vice-­‐  

archenemy;  cohabit;  hypermarket;  megaloan;  miniskirt;  outclass;  overflow;  subconscious;  superman;  surcharge;  ultrasound;  underplay;  viceroy  

Orientation   Anti-­‐,  auto-­‐,  contra-­‐,  counter-­‐,  pro-­‐  

anticlockwise;  autobiography;  contraindicate;  counteract;  proconsul  

Location  and  distance   Extra-­‐,  fore-­‐,  inter-­‐,  intra,  pan-­‐,  super-­‐,  tele-­‐,  trans-­‐  

extraterrestrial;  foreshore;  interplay;  intravenous;  pan  African;  superscript;  telescope;  transplant  

Time  and  order   Ex-­‐,  fore-­‐,  neo-­‐,  paleo-­‐,  post-­‐,  pre-­‐,  proto-­‐,  re-­‐  

ex-­‐husband;  foreshadow;  neoclassical;  paleolithic;  postwar;  preschool;  prototype;  recycle  

Number   Bi-­‐,  demi-­‐,  di-­‐,  mono-­‐,  multi-­‐,    poly-­‐,  semi-­‐,  tri-­‐,  uni-­‐    

bicycle;  demigod;  divide;  monorail;  multipurpose;  polygamy;  semicircle;  tripod;  unisex  

Grammatical  conversion:  Verb  to  adjective  

a-­‐   aboard,  astride  

Grammatical  conversion:  Noun  to  verb  

Be-­‐,  en-­‐   bewitch;  enlighten  

 

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Suffix    Type   Suffix   Examples  

Inflectional  Noun  plural   -­‐s   trees,  plants  Genetive  case  (possession,  origin,  description  etc)  

‘s   the  boy’s  hat;  the  traveller’s  story;  a  summer’s  day  

3rd  person  singular   -­‐s   (he/she/it…)  looks,  jumps,  chops  

Past  tense   -­‐ed   looked,  jumped,  chopped  Contracted  negative   -­‐n’t   cannot,  didn’t  Contracted  verb   -­‐‘re,  -­‐ve   you’re,  we’ve  -­‐ing  form  or  present  participle  

  swimming,  jumping,  looking  

-­‐ed  form  or  past  particple     Kicked  and  battered,  I  hobbled  off  the  field.  

-­‐er  comparison     ‘clevererer’,    drier    -­‐est  comparison     Cleverest,  dearest,    

Derivational  Abstract  noun  makers   -­‐age,  -­‐dom,  -­‐ery,  -­‐ful,  -­‐

hood,  -­‐ing,  -­‐ism,  -­‐ocracy,  -­‐ship  

frontage;  kingdom;  slavery;  cupful;  brotherhood;  farming;  idealism;  democracy;  membership  

Concrete  noun  makers   -­‐eer,  -­‐er,  -­‐ess,  -­‐ette,  -­‐let,    -­‐ling,  -­‐ster,  -­‐ic    

engineer;  teenager;  lioness;  kitchenette;  piglet;  duckling;  gamester;  critic  

Adverb  maker   -­‐ly,  -­‐wards,  -­‐wise   quickly;  northwards;  lengthwise  

Adjective/noun  maker   -­‐ese,  -­‐(i)an,  -­‐ist,  -­‐ite   Chinese;  Parisian;  socialist;  socialite  

Nouns  from  verbs   -­‐age,  -­‐al,  -­‐ant,  -­‐ation,  -­‐ee,    -­‐er,    -­‐ing,  -­‐ment,  -­‐or,    

wastage;  revival;  informant;  exploration;  absentee;  writer;  clothing;  amazement;  actor  

Nouns  from  adjectives   -­‐ity,  -­‐ness   Rapidity;  happiness  Adjectives  from  nouns   -­‐ed,  -­‐esque,  -­‐ful,  -­‐ic,  -­‐(i)al,  

-­‐ish,  -­‐less,  -­‐ly,  -­‐ous,  -­‐y  blue-­‐eyed;  Kafkaesque;  useful;  atomic;  editorial,  accidental;  foolish;  careless;  friendly;  ambitious;  sandy  

Adjectives  from  verbs   -­‐able,  -­‐ive   washable,  attractive