Section 1 The Difference between Punishment and

Discipline In this section we will examine the difference between punishment and discipline. Knowledge of these terms will help you understand that there are positive as well as negative ways to teach children about appropriate behaviour. Let’s begin by looking at the meaning of the word punishment. 1. Punishment Punishment is an action (penalty) that is imposed on a person for breaking a rule or showing improper conduct. Punishment aims to control behaviour through negative means. Two types of punishment are typically used with children:

• punishment involving negative verbal reprimands and disapproval • punishment involving physical punishment (this is often called corporal

punishment) Unfortunately, both forms of punishment focus on the misbehaviour and may do little or nothing to help a child behave better in future. Moreover, the child learns that the adult is superior, and the use of force – be it verbal, physical or emotional – is acceptable, especially over younger and weaker persons. This lesson can lead to incidents of bullying and violence in schools where older children dominate younger ones. Furthermore, rather than helping a child develop self-control, punishment makes the child angry, resentful and fearful. It also causes shame, guilt, anxiety, increased aggression, a lack of independence and a lack of caring for others. As a result, a child that is frequently punished will not show less inappropriate behaviour, but actually more inappropriate behaviour, causing greater problems for the educarer/pre-school teacher and other children. The word ‘discipline’ is an often misused, especially when it is mistakenly equated with punishment. Many people think discipline means the same thing as punishment. For such people, “This child needs to be disciplined” translates into “This child needs spanking” (or some other punishment). This is wrong, because discipline is not the same thing as punishment. So what does discipline mean? Let’s find out. 2. Discipline According to Kersey (2010), discipline is the practice of teaching or training a person to obey rules or a code of behaviour in both the short and long terms.

Discipline involves a multi-factorial approach that makes use of models, attitudes, rewards and consequences to teach and reinforce socially acceptable behaviour. Discipline is a process, not a single act. While punishment is meant to control behaviour, discipline is meant to develop a child’s behaviour. It is meant to teach a child self-control and confidence by focusing on what it is we want the child to learn and what the child is capable of learning. It is the basis for guiding children to be in harmony with themselves and to get along with other people. The ultimate goal of discipline is to guide children’s behaviour to enable them to take initiative, be responsible for their choices, and respect themselves and others. Through appropriate discipline, children internalise positive processes of thinking and behaving that can last a life time. Discipline must be taught, learned, and internalised. To help you fully understand the difference between discipline and punishment, have a look at the following table. It summarises the positive features of discipline as opposed to the negative features of punishment. Table 1: Comparing the features of discipline and punishment

Discipline is: Punishment is:

giving children positive alternatives being told only what NOT to do

acknowledging or rewarding efforts and good behaviour

reacting harshly to misbehaviour

when children follow rules because they are discussed and agreed upon

when children follow rules because they are threatened or bribed

consistent, firm guidance controlling, shaming, ridiculing

positive and respectful of the child negative and disrespectful of the child

physically and verbally non-violent physically and verbally violent and aggressive

logical consequences that are directly related to the misbehaviour

illogical consequences that are unrelated to the misbehaviour

teaching children to internalise self-discipline

teaching children to behave well only when they risk getting caught doing otherwise

using mistakes as learning opportunities

forcing children to comply with illogical rules ‘just because you say so’

directed at the child’s behaviour, never at the child, for example saying “Hitting your brother was not a kind thing to do” (this focuses on what the child did)

criticising the child, rather than the child’s behaviour, for example saying “You are very stupid”

(Source: Save the children, 2004)

The results we achieve through discipline are far more positive than those we can achieve through punishment. Therefore, it is essential that you learn about appropriate discipline techniques. Children will misbehave sometimes – that is only natural – and as an educarer/pre-school teacher you must know how to handle unacceptable behaviour. But before you learn how to apply appropriate discipline techniques, let’s briefly examine why children misbehave. This knowledge will help you understand that most ‘bad’ behaviour is not malicious or ‘done on purpose’ to upset you, which will in turn make applying appropriate discipline (as opposed to punishment) easier. 3. Why Children Misbehave Children’s misbehaviour is often the result of curiosity, growing independence and unclear rules. They may also lose control when they are tired, bored, over-stimulated, overly excited, have to wait for unrealistic periods of time and when routines are changed without warning. Other reasons for misbehaving are:

• needing to get attention • needing to protect their feelings and property • trying to act grown up • feeling angry, frightened or frustrated • being under a lot of stress or tension • having an unclear understanding of what is “right” • having poor family relationships at home • feeling inadequate, helpless and unable to do something

Furthermore, when adults expect too much of children in relation to their age and ability, children may start to misbehave. Therefore it is very important for educarers/pre-school teachers to know about child development and age-appropriate behaviour. This will help them decide if a child is simply ‘acting his/her age’ or if he/she is misbehaving. For example, a 2-year-old will take a toy from another child because of his/her egocentric nature. He/she has not yet learned to share, wait for his turn or ask for permission to play with the toy.

However, a 5-year-old child who grabs another child’s toy knows that this is wrong. This example shows that certain behaviour is normal or appropriate at certain ages and not at others. Now it’s time to check your understanding of this section by completing the following Self-Mark Activity in your notebook. If you find it difficult to answer any of the questions, please revise the relevant part of the section. Self-Mark Activity 1 1. Are the following statements examples of punishment or discipline? Give

reasons for your answer. a) Sam jokes around and stands on his chair during an art activity. As a

result he knocks over a pot of paint, spilling it all over the floor. The educarer yells at him and then cleans the floor.

b) Sam jokes around and stands on his chair during an art activity. As a result he knocks over a pot of paint, spilling it all over the floor. The educarer asks Sam to fetch a mop and helps him clean it up.

c) The pre-school teacher smacks Ndeshi’s bum because she keeps talking during story time and will not sit still.

d) In an attempt to get Ndeshi to stop talking and sit still, the pre-school teacher says, “Look at Ndeshi. She is really behaving like a baby. She can’t even sit still for story time.”

e) Beatrice throws a tantrum because she does not want to take a nap. The educarer calmly says, “Stop screaming right now. You are really being a horrible child”.

f) Beatrice throws a tantrum because she does not want to take a nap. The educarer calmly but firmly says, “I want you to stop screaming right now. This behaviour is not acceptable”.

2. a) Richard hits his friend with a spade in the sandpit. Give one example of

punishment in reaction to Richard’s misbehaviour, and one example of discipline. Briefly explain why your answer is an example of punishment/discipline. b) Melanie jumps off the top of the jungle gym. This is against the playground rules because it is dangerous. Give one example of punishment in reaction to Melanie’s misbehaviour, and one example of discipline. Briefly explain why your answer is an example of punishment/discipline.

3. Read the following case study and then answer the questions that follow.

Jack is three years old. He wants the educarer’s attention but she is busy working with another child. He starts to nag and tries to disrupt the activity that the educarer and other child are engaged in. To distract him and keep him busy, the educarer gives him a 20-piece puzzle to complete. Jack tries to do it by himself for a few minutes but then asks for help. The educarer tells him to wait because she is still busy. After about 10 minutes Jack starts throwing the puzzle pieces across the room. a) What is a possible reason for Jack’s nagging? b) Why do you think he starts throwing the puzzle pieces across the room? c) List other possible reasons why children misbehave (i.e., not the ones you

mentioned in your answers to a) and b)). How did you do? Compare your answers to mine given at the end of the unit. Once you are happy with your answers, move to the next section which deals with acceptable discipline techniques.