SERVANT LEADERS AS FACILITATORS

FACILITATING 101

Helps a group of people understand their common objectives

Assists to achieve objectives without taking a particular position in the discussion

Assists the group in achieving a consensus on any disagreements

Important for you to see and create value

A FACILITATOR ...

1. TO LISTEN 2. TO GIVE FEEDBACK3. TO RECEIVE FEEDBACK

3 MAIN TASKS OF A FACILITATOR

a+ Listener:

Listens responds Attend Physically

Listen Attentively

Communicate understanding

Clarify

Seek additional information

3 kinds of listening

Passive Listening

Selective Listening

Active Listening

the 7 deadly sins of listening

Sin No. 1: Filtering

• Sifting through another's words and tuning in only when one agrees.

• Commonly, a Filterer replies to someone else's statements with "yes, but…."

Sin No. 2: Second Guessing

• Usually misses important details because they are too busy

• Imagining someone has hidden motives for saying what they're saying, and

•Trying to figure out what those hidden motives might be.

Sin No. 3: Discounting

• Comes from a lack of respect for or dislike of the speaker. • A milder form of discounting occurs when what is being said is brushed off just because the person speaking is not a good speaker.

Sin No. 4: relating• Continually finding references from one’s own background and comparing them to what the speaker is saying.

Sin No. 5: Rehearsing• Thinking, while the other is talking, of what to say in response and how to say it.

• Waiting for the other to finish what he or she is saying so Rehearser can start talking again.

Sin No. 6: Forecasting

• Taking an idea from the speaker and running ahead of the topic being discussed.

• Forecasting can come from being bored with the subject matter, or simply because one's mind automatically thinks ahead.

• Mind goes much faster than speech.

Sin No. 7: placating

• Worst of all listening sins.

• Placating agrees with everything anyone else says, just to avoid conflict.

• Does not resolve anything.

EARS

YOU

EARS

EYES

UNDIVIDED ATTENTION

HEART

3 COMMUNICATION ELEMENTS

7%

38% 55%Facial Expression

andBody Language

Tone ofVoice

Words we use

Non- Verbal Communication

* These percentages apply to communication in

situations that have a big emotional component.

MEAN SAY IT WELL.The importance of proper feedback.

“THANK YOU FOR YOUR UPDATE, THIS IS A BIG HELP

TO THE TEAM. KINDLY ALSO BRIEF THE REST OF THE GROUP SO EVERYONE

IS ON THE SAME PAGE.“

“YOU’VE DONE YOUR PARTBUT CAN YOU PLEASE HELP IN THE KITCHEN MORE WITH THE

REST OF THE GROUP.“

1. How do I give feedback to other people? How do they respond to my feedback?

2. How do I receive feedback given by other people?Why do I respond that way?

3. What must I do so I can receive and give feedback well?

THINK ABOUT...

1. CONTENT2. MANNER3. TIMING

3 THINGS TO CONSIDER

Constructive feedback Non-constructive feedback

1. ContentClear and identified topic/issue Not clear; not stated

Specifics on the issue/ topic are provided Not provided; vague

2. Manner

Direct to the point Beating around the bush

Sincere Mixed message by using “You___ BUT____”

Expresses appreciation for a job well-done

(positive feedback)

Using the phrase “You need to_________”

Uses tone of concern when giving negative feedback

Uses tone of anger. frustration, disappointment; sarcasm

Verbal, informal and face to face Written, formal, through modes of technology

States observations States interpretations and not observations

3. Timing As soon as possible, real time