Secretum Meum Mihi means “My secret is mine”

Secretum Meum Mihi

Volume 2, Number 3 November 2007

A Newsletter for Catholic Women

Copyright 2007 All rights reserved Secretum Meum Mihi Presswww. MySecretisMine.com P.O. Box 1501info@mysecretismine.com Great Falls, MT 59403-1501

ST. BENEDICT ANDST. SCHOLASTICA

Feature Essay: Page 1No Grumbling Allowed!

Interview: Page 3Lucille Canaday: Singing Servants

Scripture Study: Page 5Numbers 12:1-15 Miriam and Aaron

Caught in Sibling Rivalry

Prayer Intentions: Page 6For Families Torn Apart by Violence

Historical Sketch: Page 7One Last Visit

Book Review: Page 9 100 Years of Solitude,

by Gabriel Garcia Marquez

No Grumbling Allowed!

Fish swim, birds fly…and children grumble.

Whether it’s comparative dessert or chores, most children are uniquely qualified to comment on the relative inequities of family and society. Mothers shake their heads and sigh, trying to judge fairly and yet keep chaos at bay. The needs of the monastery (and domestic church) dictate a certain level of personal sacrifice, no matter how many monks and nuns reside within.

I use this tendency to my advantage with my two youngest, ages two and three. When one notes that the other has my attention, he’ll do anything to re-direct it back to himself. Thus, they unwittingly play into my hands, ending up on an even schedule of meals, baths, stories and naps.

I’m sure Benedict and Scholastica’s mother was less cunning, and more gentle. The Rule of St. Benedict contains much that would be considered feminine wisdom in most households, including reminders to the abbot and those in authority not to lead in such a way that causes grumbling. Benedict’s wisdom was as hard-won as any mother’s could be. One set of monks tried to poison him!

(Continued on page two)

Edith Stein (St. Teresa Benedicta ) was a Jew who became Catholic in 1922 after reading

the autobiography of St. Teresa of Avila. When

asked why she converted, she wrote, “secretum

meum mihi.” She became a Carmelite in 1934, but

perished in Auschwitz. Her feast is August 9.

Consider the following excerpts from the Rule of St. Benedict:

“Similarly, [the abbot] should so regulate and arrange all matters that souls may be saved and the brothers may go about their activities without justifiable grumbling.” (Ch. 41)

and

“Let him strive to be loved rather than feared…therefore drawing on examples of discretion, the mother of virtues, he must so arrange everything so that the strong have something to yearn for, and the weak have nothing to run from.” (Ch. 64)

In fact, Benedict mentions the “evil of grumbling” frequently within his short rule, and he exhorts the brothers to put up with, “a little strictness,” in order to “safeguard love.” Most men of my acquaintance would scoff at such concerns. Strictness is a means to test and harden the body as it assaults the elements and duties of life, or so my Marine husband tells me. But that kind of masculine strictness can also bind love in chains.

The little we know of St. Scholastica (see historical sketch, page 7) indicates the generosity and piety of her family. She was consecrated to the Lord from a young age. (If I were to give the Lord any of my progeny, the boys would be my first choices. My girls are helpful to me!)

Benedict was sent to school in Rome, where the parade of immorality shocked him into a hermitage. Once he was established in a monastery at Monte Cassino, Scholastica followed him to live in a little hermitage

Page 2 November 2007

nearby, perhaps with a few other women.

The one consolation Benedict allowed himself as abbot was his yearly conference with Scholastica. Sisters are wise and loyal counselors.

As we go through life, our siblings know us perhaps better than anyone, and they also are privy to our deepest longings. When Scholastica insisted that Benedict stay to discuss the joys of heaven with her, he nearly rebuffed the gift of God…by grumbling about the weather she asked from the Lord!

We are so used to grumbling to our siblings, that it is almost natural. And yet, is it natural? Or just a habit? Is it possible that both Benedict and Scholastica were surprised to be at odds again, even with the maturity of their faith? Of course!

I’m sure he completely repented when her death made the gift clear in hindsight, and reminded him in no uncertain terms that the love of the family trumps even man-made Rules. Sometimes, when our grumbling partners remind us of important truths, we remember them well.

May we be open to the love of God in our families, and especially, in our siblings!

Peace be with you,

Page 3 November 2007

(Lucille Canaday is a 22 year old graduate of Eastern Washington University. She and her brother Omar have written and recorded several CDs of music for causes ranging from breast cancer to tsunami relief.)

Kristen: Your first song was a response to the September 11 tragedy. How did that come about?Lucille: One of my classmates lost her brother in a car accident in 2001. I wrote a poem for her and it became the song, All I Need. Very shortly after that the 9/11 tragedy happened. I had had a dream correlated with it, yet, I couldn’t seem to participate. I was too young to give blood or help. I remembered the song and my brother worked on it with me. We played it for some people and doors just opened.

Kristen: Was performing the song difficult for you?Lucille: Yes! I was so awfully shy back then. I couldn’t even order my own food in a restaurant. I would whisper to my brother what I wanted to order, and he would order for me. He’s so supportive! But this project was simple and heartfelt and grass roots for a good purpose, so I just did it.

Kristen: How did you get the word out about the song?Lucille: I called up the biggest radio station in Portland. I planned exactly what to say to the DJ, but, when he got on the phone, he was very aloof to me. I just stammered something about “time with you is gold,” and he actually came and listened to us. He canceled the pro musicians he scheduled so my brother and I could play his show.

Kristen: You don’t sell your CDs, correct? You just send them to people who donate money to the charities you serve.Lucille: Yes. Our message, especially to kids, is that no matter how old you are, you can make a difference by sharing your gifts and your heart with others. We raised more than $9000 for the New York City Firefighters Children Fund. We went to New York and hand delivered CDs to those who lost loved ones. It was a real honor to meet them.

Kristen: Tell me about the other CDs.Lucille: Shortly after September 11th, my mom was diagnosed with breast cancer, and we were taking care of my grandfather who was dying of pancreatic cancer. My grandmother Lucia also was diagnosed several years ago. I had to be the strong one for my mom and for my dad. Although both my grandparents died of cancer, my mom is a cancer survivor, so we experienced all of the different stages of cancer.

Kristen West McGuire interviews Lucille Canaday onbeing a Singing Servant of God

Lucille and Omar Canaday

Page 4 November 2007

Kristen: What a huge cross you are carrying! How do you keep your spirits up?Lucille: I get very frustrated– I am a workaholic. But, in a way, I am grateful for when I get sick, because a lot of my writing is done then. None of my songs would be here; it all came from me being sick all the time. And God has allowed me to do so many things, that I can live with the times when He allows me to be too sick to work.

I was asked to sing the national anthem at my graduation, but two weeks before I got my acid reflux. I couldn’t even rehearse, and they had music department substitutes standing by at the end of the stage, but literally two hours before my time to sing, I got my voice back! God did that!

Kristen: Do you have a musical future?Lucille: There are times when I feel that I need to move beyond what I have created. Sometimes I write music and it has nothing to do with anything. A while back, people saw me go into the recording studio at school, and they had this really frightening look, “What disaster happened now? Oh, no, Lucille is recording!” (laughs) I have the music that is half prayer and half song— those are the fundraisers— and then there is the music for the girl who falls in love and gets heartbroken. They think I am some sort of saint, when I live and love and get mad and joyful, just like everyone else!

Lucille’s Favorite Quote:

If you love until it hurts, there is no more hurt, only love. --Mother Teresa

We ended up making five songs, and we called it the Fight for Me cancer campaign. Then we became spokespeople talking about the importance of early detection, and we were able to raise a lot of money for the mammograms and different cancer screenings. We were very blessed to have people come up to us and say that our music helped with the healing process or people who had lost a loved one.

We also did one in 2005 for the Tsunami victims, and in 2006 for the victims of Hurricane Katrina.

Kristen: Omar is away at medical school now. Do you still work together?Lucille: Well, the tsunami one was my first solo. He wasn’t too happy to miss that one. (laughs) But we used the internet so he could help with the Katrina one. I wrote the song and sent him the MP3 file, and he recorded it back and forth and then I stuck it together. I had to use the first draft of my singing, because I had lost my voice due to health problems.

Kristen: Tell me about that.Lucille: I was diagnosed a couple of years ago with ankylosing spondylitis, a type of arthritis. My body is fighting itself and the pain is random and sporadic. Eventually, it leads to the fusion of my spine and ribcage and hips and they don’t have a cure for it. At one point, I was on eighteen different medications a day, but I’ve reduced the medications that I need so I can focus on my studies. I’ve also had endometriosis and ulcers, in addition to acid reflux, which keeps me from singing sometimes.

Order Lucille’s music on the web at www.FightForMe.org

Page 5 November 2007

Bible Study: Miriam and Aaron Caught in Sibling RivalryNumbers 12:1-15Miriam and Aaron spoke against Moses because of the Cushite woman whom he had married, for he had married a Cushite woman; and they said, “Has the Lord indeed only spoken through Moses? Has he not spoken through us also?” And the Lord heard it.

Now, the man Moses was very meek, more than all men that were on the face of the earth. And suddenly the Lord said to Moses, and to Aaron and Miriam, “Come out, you three, to the tent of meeting.”

And the three of them came out. And the Lord came down in a pillar of cloud, and stood at the door of the tent, and called Aaron and Miriam; and they both came forward.

And he said, “Hear my words: If there is a prophet among you, I the Lord make myself known to him in a vision, I speak with him in a dream. Not so with my servant Moses; he is entrusted with all my house. With him I speak mouth to mouth, clearly, and not in dark speech; and he beholds the form of the Lord. Why then were you not afraid to speak against my servant, Moses?”

And the anger of the Lord was kindled against them, and he departed; and when the cloud removed from over the tent, behold, Miriam was leprous, as white as snow. And Aaron turned toward Miriam, and behold, she was leprous.

And Aaron said to Moses, “Oh, my lord, do not punish us because we have done foolishly and have sinned. Let her not be as one dead, of whom the flesh is half consumed when he comes out of his mother’s womb.”

And Moses cried to the Lord, “Heal her, O God, I beseech Thee.” But the Lord said to Moses, “If her father had but spit in her face, should she not be shamed seven days? Let her be shut outside the camp seven days, and after that, she may be brought in again.” So Miriam was shut up outside the camp seven days; and the people did not set out on the march till Miriam was brought in again.

Context: The book of Numbers takes up the story of the people of Israel after the Exodus from Egypt, but before they take possession of the Promised land. This story is confirmation that there was dissension and unhappiness among the rank and file as they struggled to survive in the desert.

Translation: Scholars believe that this book was written in the fifth century B.C., by priests concerned with explaining the many liturgical norms and sacrifices codified after the Jews returned from their exile by the Persians. It is one of the five parts of the of Jewish Torah, the books of the Law.

The Catholic Edition of the Revised Standard Version of the Bible, copyright 1965, 1966 by the Division of Christian Education of the National Council of the Churches of Christ in the United States of America. Used by permission. All rights reserved

Prayer Intentions: Pray for Families Torn Apart by Violence

In the comfort of our living rooms, the television brings stories of the many families torn apart by violence— by war, by genocide, by substance abuse, by rape, by persecution of the state, by sins of all kinds. The compassionate heart cries in agony with them, knowing all belong to us as brothers and sisters by virtue of Christ. In the month that Americans celebrate Thanksgiving, let us be doubly thankful for the blessings of liberty, and redouble our efforts to pray for those whose lives are endangered globally and even in our own backyards.

World Vision is a Christian humanitarian organization dedicated to working with children, families and their communities worldwide to reach their full potential by tackling the causes of poverty and injustice. Among their concerns is the protection of children from armed conflict. World Vision offers humanitarian assistance to children and their families during wartime, child-focused community development and advocacy to prevent the enticement and abduction of children by armed groups.http://www.worldvision.org

Report of the APA Presidential Task Force on Violence and the FamilyThe American Psychological Association produced this report on family violence. The task force defined family violence and abuse as a range of physical, sexual, and emotional maltreatment by one family member against another. They also included a variety of relationships beyond those of blood or marriage, in recognition that similar dynamics of abuse may occur in these relationships. The common dynamic at the heart of the violent behavior was the perpetrator’s misuse of power, control, and authority. http://www.apa.org/pi/viol&fam.html

Page 6 November 2007

Vocabulary:the man (Moses) was very meek: The plural in Hebrew for this word “man” is anawim, which has idealistic overtones of piety, while anayv (“meek”) connotes affliction, poverty and sanctity in suffering.mouth to mouth: This expression is found nowhere else in the Hebrew scriptures. This speaks to the unique character of Moses’ relationship with God.she may be brought in again: All lepers were considered unclean, and this is the basis of Miriam’s banishment, but it is clear from the context that God heals her, otherwise she would not have been allowed back into the camp.

Brothers and sisters know all our dirt, don’t they? And envy seems to take up residence at every family dinner table. Despite clear evidence that Moses was God’s anointed, his imposed-upon siblings had to speak up, and air the dirty laundry, too. (Find me the political family without issues, please!)

Alas, God has plans for all of us much bigger than our petty complaints about one another. Not only does God clearly rebuke Miriam and Aaron, but places Moses in the position of delivering Miriam from her fate. After a short exile, she is welcomed back. And the camp moves on.

Discussion Questions:1. Have you ever been tempted to criticize a family member publicly? Did you? How did your relationship change as a result?

2. Although we aren’t the wandering tribes of Israel, we often need to “move on” after unpleasant family episodes. Especially at Thanksgiving, what can you do to be a peacemaker in your own “camp?”

Page 7 October 2007

Historical Sketch:One Last Visit

The following story of Saints Benedict and Scholastica are found in Book II, Chapter 33 of the Dialogues of Pope Gregory the Great:

Now Benedict had a sister named Scholastica, who had been consecrated to the Almighty Lord from the time of her childhood. She had the custom of visiting him once a year, and the man of God would come down to meet her at a place belonging to the monastery not far beyond the gate.

One day she came, as was her custom, and her venerable brother came down to meet her with his disciples. They spent the whole day in the praise of God and in holy conversation. The darkness of night was already falling when they took their meal together. The hour grew later and later as they sat there at table carrying on their holy conversation.

His sister, a holy monastic woman, then made a request: “I beg you. Do not leave me this night so that we may talk until morning more about the joys of heavenly life. But he responded, “What are you talking about, my sister? Under no circumstances can I stay outside my cell.”

Now the heavens were so calm that no cloud appeared in the sky. When this holy monastic woman heard her brother’s refusal, she folded her hands and put them upon the table. Leaning down, she put her head on her hands to make a prayer to God. When she raised her head from the table, there broke forth such powerful lightning and thunder and such a flood of rain that neither the venerable Benedict nor the brothers with him could set foot outside the door of the place where they were sitting. Indeed, while resting her head on her hands, this holy monastic woman had poured out a flood of tears on the table, and in this way she had attracted the rain to the calm skies.

(continued on page 8)

Camp To Belong is a national non-profit organization dedicated to reuniting siblings placed in separate foster homes and other out of home care for events of fun, emotional empowerment and sibling connection. The Camp To Belong Summer Camp Program has reunited over 2,000 siblings at camps and reunions since 1995. http://www.camptobelong.org

Lord, let us pray:* for the complete repentance of those engaged in violent acts of any kind;

* for brothers and sisters to be liberated from webs of violence and instability caused by substance abuse;

* for individuals working to strengthen families and limit the violence caused by poverty and drug abuse, that they might find encouragement and personal fortitude;

* for an end to the wars and famines that cause young people to become used to violence in their daily lives, especially civil wars;

* for those families unaffected by violence, that they would pray for the suffering victims of all forms of violence and directly support those who take action to help;

* for the cooperation of the many agencies dedicated to eradicating violence of all kinds across the globe; and

* for those who knowingly or unknowingly contribute to violent acts that devalue the integrity and dignity of the bonds of family life, that they might be enlightened and repent.

Amen.

Page 8 November 2007

The flood followed her prayer in an instant. The connection between the prayer and the storm was such that her head rose from the table together with the thunder as if both the raising of her head and the falling of the rain were one and the same action.

When the man of God saw that he could not get back to the monastery because of the lightning and thunder and the great flood of rain, he was irritated and began to complain: “May God have mercy on you, my sister. Why have you done this?” And she replied to him: “See, I asked you, and you would not listen to me. So I asked my Lord, and he has listened to me. Now then, go, if you can. Leave me, and go back to the monastery.” But unable to go outside, he stayed against his will in a place where he had been unwilling to stay on his own. So it happened that they spent the whole night in vigil, and during their holy conversation about the spiritual life they found fulfillment for themselves in their relationship with one another.

I have told this story about what the venerable man wanted but was unable to have. And when we examine his mind, there can be no doubt that he had wanted the sky to remain calm, as it had been when he had come down. But contrary to what he wanted, he found a miracle worked by a woman’s heart with the power of the omnipotent God. It is no wonder that the woman who had desired to see her brother that day proved at the same time that she was more powerful than he was. For as John says: “God is love,” and according to that most just precept, she proved more powerful because she loved more.

The next day the venerable woman went back to her own cell, and the man of God to his monastery. Three days later while in his cell, he looked up at the sky and saw the soul of his sister after it had gone forth from her body. It was in the form of a dove, and he saw it penetrate the hidden mysteries of heaven...and he announced her death to his brothers.

“The Death of St. Scholastica”by Jean Restout, 1730

Account of the death of Scholastica from:

Dialogues II, Chapters 33-34. Translated by Fr. Harry Hagan, OSB, Saint Meinrad Archabbey, St. Meinrad, IN. March 2002.

Page 9 November 2007

Book Review:One Hundred Years of Solitudeby Gabriel Garcia Marquez

448 pages, (New York: Harper Perennial Classics, 2006), $14.95

Reviewed by Beverly Mantyh

Marquez’s nobel prize winner weaves together themes of solitude, war, exploitation and predestination in the style of a fantastical folk story told by rambling gypsies around a fire.

The Buendia family saga begins with the marriage of cousins José Arcadio Buendia and Ursula Iguarán. Ursula fears that their incest might produce a child with a pig’s tail like that of a tragic relative who lived in isolation his entire life. Ursula refuses to consummate the marriage. Eventually, José’s cock-fighting nemesis Prudencio insults him on the topic, and José kills him, then goes home with his spear and challenges Ursula to give it up or die. They enthusiastically consummate their marriage while the sounds of the victim’s mourning family float through their bedroom window. All this is told in a detached voice, void of all moralizing. Marquez takes the first Buendia skeleton from the closet; next comes the ghost.

The courts find José Arcadio innocent of murder, but the sad and lonely face of the ghost of Prudencio haunts José and Ursula. They strike out into the unmapped rainforest to start anew, founding the village of Maconda.

José Arcadio and Ursula live long lives and have many descendants. They live through gypsy distractions, a plague of insomnia, government troubles, war, western exploitation of their natural resources and almost all the dysfunction known to families. The twists and turns of Marquez’s plot keep the reader’s interest even when the character of the moment is distasteful.

The over-riding theme circles back to the isolation of the original pig-tailed cousin and the ghostly loneliness of Prudencio. Are we trapped in a pre-determined fate? Are our destinies thrust upon us by our families or by bigger forces we can not hope to escape? A moralizing author could have a field day with the adventures and misadventures of the Buendia family. Marquez rejects easy answers and maintains his detached, nonjudgmental voice to the end. He leaves his readers in their solitude to reach their own conclusions. Discussion Questions: 1. The Buendia family is plagued with self-involvement. They welcome illegitimate children, old gypsies and lost girls into their home. Thus, they seem open but somehow family members can’t get beyond their assigned roles. Brothers and sisters can experience the same situation in radically different ways. With the holidays approaching, how can I open up my perspective to see things from my sibling’s point of view? 2. Time flies, time crawls and time is suspended. The spinster aunts and their day in day out routines turn time into a slow moving metronome. After the banana plantation exploits, time flies so quickly that true history is forgotten. A lifetime is reduced to seconds before the guns of a firing squad. What influences your sense of time? What brings a sense of peace and orderliness to the passage of time? 3. Magical Realism refers to a style of writing that with a straight face interweaves the fantastic with ordinary life: the ghost of Prudencio; the assumption of Remedios the Beauty; Melquiades’ ghost. Marquez’s characters see nothing out of the ordinary in these events. Some critics think the “magical realism” oversimplifies Marquez’s point. Is Marquez proposing reality is bigger than our scientific theories? Or, do you think Marquez is simply bringing elements of folk tales into his fiction?

Secretum Meum Mihi PressKristen West McGuireFounder/Editor in Chief

Editorial Advisory Board

Alexandra BurghardtMeredith GouldGenevieve KinekeBeverly MantyhMargaret McGuireSandra Miesel

Secretum Meum Mihi is a monthly periodical dedicated to fostering the spirituality of Catholic women. Individual subscriptions are $12.95/year for download, and $24.95/yr for U.S. Mail delivery. (International mail delivery $29.95). Parish subscrip-tions are $119.95. Address all correspondence to the address below, or visit our website at:

www.MySecretisMine.com

Coming Next Month: Saints Radegund andVenantius Fortunatus

Interview: Barbara Errakko Taylor: Weaving Prayer into Life

Bible Study: Psalm 131A Child Quieted at the Breast

Book Review: The Age of Innocence, by Edith Wharton

Historical Sketch: A Chaste Friendship

Secretum Meum Mihi PressP.O. Box 1501 Great Falls, MT 59403-1501

Page 10 November 2007

“Where the neighbors by blood are also the neighbors in spirit,

an ease of communication results which is like a foretaste of

heavenly bliss.”

– Edith Stein, in Science of the Cross,

translated from the German by Suzanne Batzdorff

Copyright permissions may be directed to:

copyright@MySecretisMine.com

New this fall!

Free “Pray with Us!” Emails, from Secretum Meum Mihi Press!

Visit our website at

www.MySecretisMine.com