Making an effort at making friends abroad

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*Korea is a very introduction-based culture, if I make one

friend, I can inherit 10 more.

*In the U.S., this will not likely be the case. You will have to

take the initiative.

*So you may ask yourself, “How can I connect with American

students?”

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*What are 3 appropriate conversation starters?

*What are 3 topics we shouldn’t discuss when we meet

new people?

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*Weather: This one is always safe and can open doors to other

topics.

*Common Interests: Maybe you want to talk to someone in your

class about the course or things to do on campus.

*Sports: Americans generally love sports.

There are so many, but these are three easy suggestions.

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As we discussed some last time…

*Religion

*Money

*Politics

Religion: Once again, unless you want to get into

this topic, avoid it. You should have plenty of

other things to talk about without bringing this

up.

Money: It’s common in Asia for people to ask me

how much I make in a month, but in the U.S.

this is very off-limits. It’s a private matter

unless the other person brings it up.

Politics: As we’ve discussed, Americans will

often bring up politics, but it’s not something

you should discuss during a first meeting. Do

not feel pressured to talk about it.

If the university sets up a social event for you,

GO!! It’s the easiest way to meet people if you

are shy.

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*Bars

*Cafés

*House Parties

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Bars (especially college bars) aren’t like they are

in Korea. In many cases, Americans go to bars to

meet new people. In Korean university bars,

mostly groups of students already know each

other or are grouped in booths. American bars

are a much freer atmosphere.

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What are 3 ways to start a conversation in a

local or campus café?

*1. Same book

*2. Same drink

*3. The person across from you (almost anytime)

Campus and near-campus cafés can become

quite crowded! Don’t be alarmed if someone

asks you if they can share the table with you.

This is also a great way to start a conversation!

You never know, they may have a lot in common

with you.

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Probably the biggest difference in the way U.S.

students socialize compared to Koreans is the

house party. Many students are either too young

for or can’t afford the bar. The house party is

an alternative for meeting new people. You may

be invited to one! Here are three things to

remember if you are.

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Knowing who is hosting the party can go a long

way in making a good impression and new

connections.

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Compliments go a long way for anyone.

Take the time to say something nice about what

someone is wearing. You never know where the

conversation can go!

*

Moving around the house and smiling will almost

certainly invite a conversation. Remember, a lot

of American students have not been abroad

(especially to Asia) and might be intimidated by

you. Smiling can help diffuse the tension, and

you may teach them more than they will teach

you!

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What if you try class, the bars, the cafés, and a

house party and still can’t make a friend in your

short time there? Well, you are on a university

campus, and there are so many students just

like you there. Reach out to the international

community. I did in China.

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*Money

*Demands on your time--Learn time management

strategies.

*You may never get another chance to go abroad,

so you have to make the most of this chance.

Don’t let money stop you from taking a weekend

trip. Budget, talk to your friends about sharing

costs to see something new.

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Let’s talk food!