Compiled and written by Sikhathele Nkala

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Table of ContentsDedication and Acknowledgements 2Table of Contents 3Background 4Introduction 5Stories from the Ekangala Community Action Group 6I have been down: Mpho Chavura 7Life is like a Pencil: Nthabiseng Sethunya 8I was lost but now I am found: Musawenkosi Ntuli 9Live like a Phoenix: Mpho Chavura 12I love my life: Mpho Chavura 13Life is a Roller Coaster: Mpho Chavura 14I am number 27: Musawenkosi Ntuli 15Purpose in this world: Musawenkosi Ntuli 16Game Two (2) Peace and Harmony: Bongane Shabalala 17My life is an achiever and a helper: Thapelo Abie Khalipha 18I am me and I am no longer at the bottom: Simon Gumpe 19The incubator: Nthabiseng Sethunya 21Love Pain in both Men and Women: Patricia Mahlangu 22I did not know now I know: Patricia Sibanyoni 23Mother love letter: Patricia Sibanyoni “Lady P” 24The best of me: Penny Forever 25Life is a highway: Xolani Gladwin Khumalo 26I matter: Elizabeth Phala 27The game nine peace and harmony: Bongane Shabalala 28A Girl Who Is Lonely: Wendy Sibanyoni 29My Case study dated June 2014: Elizabeth Phala 30My Story: David Vincent Mahlangu 31Community Awaken: Tsamme Mfundisi 32The Inner Critic: Mpho Chavura 33Overview of Work Carried out in Ekangala Community 34Conclusion 35

“Healing for individuals, families, leaders, institutions and the whole society is no longer a luxury or social service issue. It is now a necessity and a security issue. It is now an economic and development issue. Any attempt to ensure security, development and stability of our country without addressing our collective wound-edness, is futile. Psychological health is a priority, and it equals a healthy community and a healthy nation.”

Nomfundo MogapiExecutive Director of the Centre for the Study of Violence and Reconciliation and clinical psychologist who specialises in trauma.

Dedication and AcknowledgementsThis booklet is dedicated to the members of the Ekangala Community Action Group (EAG) who have suffered various forms of violence, and have taken up the fight for an end to violence in their community. Their experiences (their stories and poems) form the essence of this booklet — and the basis for CSVR’s Psychosocial Wellness for Effective Community Intervention model.

The development of this booklet has been made possible through the financial support of the Finnish Embassy, 1st for Women and USAID.

CSVR would like to sincerely thank the following people who played a critical role in the production of this booklet:• The Ekangala Community Action

Group, who took part in the work-shops and delved deep into their past and shared their lived experiences with CSVR.

• Ekangala community stakeholders and government institutions, who have tire-lessly worked hand in hand with the Ekangala Community Action Group (and continue to do so).

• The Community Psychosocial Facilita-tors from CSVR, who demonstrate on a daily basis their commitment to this project.

• Nomfundo Mogapi and Samantha Stern, who facilitated the psychosocial wellness workshops, and introduced the Ekangala Community Action Group members to skills to help them overcome personal challenges and supported them as they found themselves.

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Background

Twenty-one years after South Africa’s transition from apartheid to a democratic regime, numerous types of violence (gender-based, youth, state/structural and xenophobic violence) continue to plague our communities. Various communi-ty-based strategies have been designed and implemented in an attempt to combat the violence, but in most places it has remained unabated. In particular, insuffi-cient resources and services have greatly thwarted community efforts to build peace and achieve sustainable development.

Over the last ten years, the Centre for the Study of Violence and Reconciliation (CSVR) has been working with Ekangala, Kagiso, the Inner City of Johannesburg (with specific focus on Mayfair, Hillbrow and Yeoville) and Marikana to challenge the different types of violence affecting these communities. In particular, our work has involved setting up community action groups, which provide a platform for individuals and community groups to work together in advocating for, and implementing, violence-prevention activities.

Perhaps the most important lesson we have learned from our work with these com-munities is that before one can effectively contribute to positive social change, one must go through one’s own journey of healing. Sadly, society has taught many of us to ignore the pain, injustice, discrimination, abuse and violations that we have suffered. Psychologists explain that the greater pain is often not in the experience of injustice, discrimination, abuse and violation itself, but in bottling-up an untold story of pain or hurt; and that this contributes to the self-sabotaging beliefs that drive our behaviour (which often involves hurting ourselves and others, especially those we love dearly).

Against this backdrop, CSVR has refined its model for working with communities so that it includes a psychosocial wellness training component. This component encourages healing through a deeper understanding of ourselves and others, in-cluding the telling of our stories. Our belief is that this type of integrated interven-tion has a multiplier effect – it can bring about great positive change not only at an individual level, but at the family and community (and even national) levels as well.

Introduction

This booklet is therefore a testimony to the fact that we all have powerful

stories to tell; and that when we tell our stories in a safe and supportive

environment, we can begin the journey of healing and transformation.

This booklet presents twenty-five stories and poems written by members

of the Ekangala Community Action Group (EAG) – young people drawn

from various community-based organisations in the area. These stories

and poems were gathered during a series of psychosocial wellness work-

shops, which took place between April and October 2014. They illustrate

the deep and lasting effects of psychological woundedness and the ways

in which woundedness contributes to the cycle of violence and conflict

in our communities. But most of all they are stories of strength, survival,

resilience and hope.

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I have been down: Mpho Chavura

I have been down, crushed and rated among the weakest link, drained, used and pinned down by my failure moments and not regarding my greater moments.

I have been down, giving something to the ungrateful, negative, opposite minded human beings who did not want anything to be my success and my ability to do things differently.

I have been down, life put me down, and closed doors, fake friends appeared, those ones I claimed to be close friends, trusted friends changed colours on me and betrayed me.

I have been down and ended up accepting that I am nothing in the world, I told myself “I can’t” and “I won’t” be heard because I am useless, mission less, vision-less, bound to public villainess. My actions were driven by hard times pain and torture. I have been spiritually broken, disconnected myself from good deeds and mounted myself with bad characters like gangsters.

I have been down, but had to change when I understood that in order to sit down and relax I have to stand up, face my fears and fight. Fight for what? Fight for what must bring me peace and relaxation, harmony and understanding. I studied ways that changed my nothingness to something. Now, where I am, I am in control of my own actions, and I found inner peace. I understand that you can’t change pain-ful past but you can change the perspective of how people see you.

Now I am on my knees thanking God that he sent me an angel. Those who thought I was nothing, now they see me as a legend. I found my freedom and I am building my world where people can speak my language.

Stories from the Ekangala Community Action Group

Ekangala is a black township situated in the western part of Johannesburg in the Gauteng Province. The main economic activity in this municipality is coal mining, which has been declining in the last ten years. As a result, this municipality is characterised by high levels of unemployment; most people travel to Pretoria to look for work. As is often the case, the young people are especially affected; there are high levels of young people engaged in violence and crime, and alcohol and drug abuse (Nyaope). The township also faces significant challenges with regard to the development and maintenance of basic infrastructure and service delivery. Lately, there have been a number of violent service delivery protests in the area.

Through the following stories and poems, the EAG members clearly articulate the impact of their lived experiences and the different ways in which they have expressed their trauma and woundedness. The writing and drawing of these stories provided the EAG members with opportunities to reflect, challenge their assump-tions and create new perspectives – important steps along the journey of healing. This is most evident by the ways in which the group members described themselves at the end of the training: “I am of value; I am worthy of love; I am important, I am accepted; and I am in touch with my purpose”.

We salute the EAG members for their courage to walk the path of healing and for sharing their lived experiences through this booklet.

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I was lost but now I am found : Musawenkosi Ntuli

I was in the world with no ground and skyI was floatingNot knowing what to doI was stuck up in my world of ignoranceNot wanting to know how to fix a problem that emerges at a certain stageWhat I was doing was my concernI was stuck to my wounded-nessI was lost

I was stuck to people who did not impact my life positivelyI hid behind the word “peer pressure”At my lower level of school I was fascinated by the group of peopleWho did not do good things?I was convinced that in order for me to be really visible to people, I have to be entertaining, or get out of the way by bothering teachers and other learnersThen I was in the spot lightI was recognised I was popularI did not know what I was doing I was lost in the shadow of darknessThe environment was working for meI loved being in the middle of everythingI really felt good

But it all changed when I got to high schoolThings were done differently in high schoolI had to find my way inI had to come with a new strategy of blending in the new communityBecause of my fascination of joining wrong doersAgain I found a way of blending in another law breaking groupIt was all about absconding classes and victimising other learners Being out of the line of the school rules

The school I was in at that time It was the worst of them all around the community of Ekangala Being mostly inspired by Yizo! Yizo! the then popular local drama group during 2006

Life is like a Pencil : Nthabiseng Sethunya

We use a pencil to draw and eraser to erase. When you draw, along the way you make mistakes that need to be erased in order to proceed with the drawings. In life we make mistakes and we have to let those mistakes go so that we can continue living our lives, and the only thing to do is to learn from our mistakes.

There is a time when a pencil needs to be sharpened, in order to continue to drawing. In life we face difficult situations which we cannot run away from. In order to gain something you have to lose something. Definitely you will leave a mark, and the mark depends on how you live your life, your behaviour and attitude towards self, life and others. A good mark brings a huge change and good memories in people’s lives. A good mark will be remembered forever, but a bad mark will destroy and kill nations.

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I was a chairperson of the group at the age of 15 I was leading people from the age of 10 to 25 years of age.Despite all the commitments I had that kept me busy after schoolI really struggled to strike a balance between my social life and school work, until I was blessed with the guy who did choral music, his name was David Gabangani who showed me the light, and I was one of the huge rated at my school Lingitshudu Secondary School.That’s when I really knew what my life was all aboutI was so in touch with my work both school and outside school.After my Matric level in 2009, I was given with bursaries to do End User Comput-ing at M&C College in 2010, the biggest years of my life and yes to the Africans at large because South Africa was hosting the FIFA world cup.At the college I still continued balancing my tertiary life and the TLOI.I graduated at M&C College and I was awarded with my End User Computing certificate

In 2011, I was at home doing my community work, later that year I was invited on a re-launching of a Youth Desk, for a local Police Station.I was then nominated to be the Chair person at the age of 19.I got the opportunity to speak for the youth of Ekangala, travelling around Gauteng meeting youth who have the same spirit as me. In 2012, I started working with the Centre for the Study of Violence and Reconcialition (CSVR), facilitating dialogues and conducting workshops on HIV/AIDS, Gender Based Violence and Youth violence in the community.

In 2013, I got a Learnership for Nursing at S.G Lourens Nursing College.It didn’t really get well with nursing, my heart was not thereBut because I listen to my heart I went to the principal and told him that my heart was not happy there and that my calling is somewhere else in the community out there. She understood as I was one of the promising students.

This is where I am today, pursuing my purpose with the Ekangala Community Action Group with support from CSVR.

I was well known within my community for playing soccer and a member of hip-hop crew named Ghost Riders.This is where I met my life time friend Mpho Chavura and he was popularly known as Scotch.We rocked the movement of Hip-hop industry at Ekangala being highly inspired by the life of American Hip-hop stars and their doings.

In 2005, I started to lift weights because I was fed up by people who were bullying us around. Because of my weight lifting and physical development I was nicknamed “Batista”The name being formed the WWW superstar. This name gave me attention, which I was seekingI was lost in my sturdy body, seeking respect from anything I came acrossEven though I was not really the fighting type I would only fight if I had enough of somebody’s wrong doings to others.Because of my mind of being creative,I started engaging myself to an Art and Culture Group called “Hopeful Youth Movement”

My primary school friend introduced me to the group. His name was William. He asked me to give him a comedy drama to present it to the group.I did as he asked but because of my curiosity of what was going on there.When I got there I was really amazed of how people there, were so alive, so peaceful and most of all how they were so in tune with their creative mind.After doing my first acting where I was asked to play the role of an abusive child.I got evaluated and got one message, I will never forget in my life.The director said to everyone if you don’t pick up your socks this new guy will role you all out.Those words did not mean a lot to me then, but yet continued to haunt me.

In 2007, Hopeful Youth Movement was shut down, and I was really honoured when most of the group members came and asked me to come up with an idea to start another group.

Yes, it was started and it was the most powerful youth group in Ekangala community.We came up with a new name “The Light of Impumelelo” (TLoI)I was the leader of the new movement I was lost, but now I am proud My calling of working with community started there.

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I love my life : Mpho Chavura

My life is the greatest!

With all the cycles of greatness

All the hard times and experiences

Those hard times and experiences build me day by day

To be the best man I can be

To be the legend the world can look up to

To be the greatest product of human kind

Everything that happened in my life

And everything that happens now

It all shaped, built and created my tomorrow

It all gave me the power to breath

And the power to say

I am proud to be me

Yes, I may not perfect, but I am trying to be

I will always be me, no matter what?

I love my life! I love my life

This is my life,

My greatest life

Live like a Phoenix : Mpho Chavura

Live your life to be the greatest

Live your life to be the legend

Live your life to be remembered

Live your life as the legend or the phoenix

“To be or not to be that is the question”

Do you stay down, when the world puts you down

Do you stay down, when things don’t go right

Do you stay down, when you have nothing to give

Rise from the ashes of disappointment

Rise from the ashes of your wrong doings

Rise from your ashes, even if there is no hope

Rise from the ashes of the negative mind

Rise from the ashes to be the legend

Be the change you want to see

A phoenix never dies, it lives on forever

No matter what happens, but it always gets up

Live like a phoenix and rise from your ashes.

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I am number 27 : Musawenkosi Ntuli

I am a legend of change in this world

I am recognition of a good nature

I am an individual, responsible for the next smile

I am the most important property of the world

Without me the world will never be the same

With me the world will not know humanity

I am an agent of change

I am the heart with openness to everyone

I am the gateway for knowledge

According to the Enneagramme, I am number two the helper and

seven the socialiser

With the two numbers together, I become number twenty seven

I am the number that brought freedom to South Africa

I am the number that brought joy and happiness

I am the hope of the world

I am the impossible to be seen possible

I am the legend of change in this world

I am who I am

Life is a Roller Coaster : Mpho Chavura

Life is a roller coaster with challenges

With all the ups and downs it brings

Life is a big unpredictable ride

A ride that keeps you captivated

It’s not about what you know

But it’s all about what you do

There is no expert for this roller coaster

One might say, “I am the best in what I do”

But in this roller coaster you get tears

Just in the middle of the smooth ride

You get confused while things seem easy

You get excited while things seems hard

What you do today will determine your tomorrow

Life is a roller coaster ride with no manual

It’s about the survival of the fittest and the strong

And the wire on the lime line or good and bad

This is my life

My roller coaster life

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Game Two (2) Peace and Harmony : Bongane Shabalala

My nine, my game is rounded by all numbersI play the game of finding unionPeace and harmony is my place of joyI easily interact with everyone Separation and conflict is my challengeI do not understand and I hate conflictStopping me when I am talking is a pain in my heart.I am always on top of the game I am dynamic in everything I doSweet and harmonious!Life around a peace maker is goodI play my game calmly I play for a receptive team and I feel goodI play for comforting and idealising the teamThe proactive type and inclusive Every talk is my talk; that makes me feel goodEvery game is my game

All the numbers they need me to create peace and harmony1 - I talk about the life of a reformer with a sense of mission 2 - Helper with help and support 3 - Achiever with the best 4 - Individualistic with uniqueness5 - Investigators with high developed mind6 - Loyalist with safe environment and deal with danger7 - Enthusiastic with optimism, love of life,8 - The challenger with energy, vision and courage to face life

But all of these just need me because I bring peace and harmonyYes, I easily interact with everyone This is who I amSo, this is my game.

Purpose in this world : Musawenkosi Ntuli

We are in this world

To meet others and be with others and enjoy ourselves

We are in this world to create opportunities, love and hate

We are in this world to laugh, cry and regret

We are in this world to encourage and discourage

We are in this world to make mistakes and be corrected

We are in this world to live life

That is why I am saying, let’s take care of ourselves and respect life.

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I am me and I am no longer at the bottom :Simon Gumpe

It all started in 2005 as a young boy who was well disciplined scared of his parents, more especially his father. His father was working at a steel company. There was a time when things had to change. As a result of this boy spending most of his time with his father, everything he wanted or wanted to talk about he would go to his father.

Things started to change when the steel company where his father worked moved from Ekandastria to Witbank. Because his father was a bread winner then there was no way that he could quit his job, so he had to leave his family and move with the company so that he could continue looking after his family, not knowing that lots of things will change around his family. I can’t blame him; his wife was there to carry on taking care of the family and close some gaps on his behalf. But things became hard for the wife.

Things got worse when the boy started hanging around with friends. They were not just friends, they were small boys trying to have fun and change their daily routine because all they did was stay and watch movies at home or write songs. However, that stopped being fun. This boy and his friends started doing bad things. This included activities such as smoking and drinking. Since, they always wanted to experience new things every time, smoking and drinking was not enough for them. They were up-coming gangsters but that has affected the young boy who no longer had time for his family. As a result of his behaviour, his family started to suspect something; and of course, they were right. Eventually his family got the truth.

After the truth was found, things got worse because everyone in the family started to change on the boy. I was called names; some treated me like an adopted street kid. All of that was done when my father was at work. That affected me mostly because I had no one to talk. When my father came back from work he was filled with all the stories I had done. He was angry and he told me he was out of my life for good. I had to hustle for money to eat at school and buy myself clothes and everything.

That happened for some time, until I decided to change along the way because I was about to finish school. I left crime, drugs and alcohol telling myself I am a

My life is an achiever and a helper :Thapelo Abie Khalipha

Before I became a community worker in Ekangala community, I was unemployed for a period of five years. I was in the dark side of life because I was trapped inside the house without knowing what to do. Luckily came two ladies at my place who introduced themselves as the community health workers. I think these two angels were sent by God because when I had a conversation with them, we immediately got connected and I became interested in the job that they were doing, and that is when I started. Along the way, I realised that working for the community and helping people is my passion.

I kept on helping people as home career and realised that my life changed from be-ing a tsosti (thug) to a helper in the community. The more I saw the differences that I made in the community the more my life changed. One thing that I have learned in life is that, if you are a person who takes things for granted in life, you become a failure. And another thing that I have learned is that people do things that they are not supposed to do because they are lost and they do not know their passion.

As a helper I have realised that if you are still wounded, then there is nothing you can do for others or for yourself. So you must sit with your feelings first and stop judging or criticising yourself or others. You need to be open minded and be active, then you can continue being good in what you are doing. I have achieved a lot in life by learning how to handle and deal with different situations.

Today, I thank God for meeting an organisation like the Centre for the Study of Violence and Reconciliation (CSVR). CSVR allowed me to be part of a group which is called EAG ((Ekangala Advisory Group). This group has brought change in our community.

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The incubator : Nthabiseng Sethunya

Bottled in store away

Every beat of the heart is registered to the machine

Timed and monitored every beat at the time

No freedom of expression

No freedom of movement

No freedom of speech

Every right violated

Yet they are not convicted

Every emotion felt and yet can’t be expressed

They kept me here away from the world

Yet again it knows I exist yet they have heard of me

Hopeful, I stay

Faithful, I remain

Trustworthy, I stand

It’s a bottle of temporal storage

That I am kept here for a while

That I am kept for a selfish purpose

That I am kept for a selfless will

That I am kept for a negative restoration

But soon the machines will switch off

This bottle shall break into pieces

The lion will break free and its roar

Will crack the break of dawn

changed person. What I did not know was that worst things were yet to come. I was doing matric when my uncle asked me to go and stay with him. He had a fight with his wife and they were on separation. I had no problem with that, but not until he brought his wife back. I was told to go back home.

But the family refused, not knowing that there was trouble at my uncle’s home. His wife started locking me outside until we had a fight. I was reported to the police and I was a wanted during metric final examination and I got arrested.

Time goes on its. In 2011, I found myself with no form of identification, no job, no school. Later I got a job from Census Project from Stats-South Africa. I didn’t know anything about community jobs, but after working there, community love developed. Then after a while, we struggled to start a Youth against Crime Organ-isation. That was when I was introduced to youth desk under the Department of Community Support. I worked there, that same year we were visited by two CSVR community facilitators. These wanted to work hand in hand with us to prevent violence in our community.

We were so excited to work with them and I found that my happiness was not wasted. CSVR came into my life and taught me different life skills, handling different problems and helping people in difficult situations. They gave us training on psychosocial wellness. This programme transformed my life and changed my view towards myself and people around me. I learnt how to respond to the triggers and my life charges.

I am me and I am no longer at the bottom : Simon Gumpe continued

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I did not know, now I know : Patricia Sibanyoni

I didn’t know, now I know

I didn’t know that I was an achiever

Until I found a woman who was sent by God to teach me about my “Personality

Type”

God sent me an angel to open my eyes

To help me heal from my wounded-ness

God I thank you for this wonderful angel

May you keep on blessing them.

I didn’t know, but now, I know

I didn’t know I was attractive, charming, ambitious and energetic

Until God sent me an angel

I didn’t know that I have a problem

Of worker holism and competiveness, but now I know

I didn’t know that I am best in self-accepting, authentic and best role model to

inspire me

But now I know because of the angel that was sent by God

I didn’t know that my core desire is to be admired

And value potential

But with help of an angel now I know

I didn’t know in the conflict I fear being rejected,

But now I know

With the help of the motivator

I didn’t know that my when I am healthy

I am a time conscious, focused and self-accepting, admirable

But now I know thanks to the Angel that God sent me

Love and Pain in Men and Women : Patricia Mahlangu

A woman is a survivor

A woman is a protector

A woman is a pretender

She can be hurt and still smile and say, “It is well with my soul”

And also say, “okusalayo Ubaba we ngani zami”

A man can be abused and

His inner critic will tell him

Don’t report such violence

Man say but “Umama wezingane zami”

Mhlaba awuna mahloni

Mhlaba awuneliseki

Life is not fair, both man and women suffer the same pain and violation

But women are taken seriously, and they chant the slogan

“Wathinta abafazi imbokodwa”

Mhlaba Cabanga nga madoda

Let’s stop calling man names

Let’s create and chant a new slogan that says;

“Wathinta amadoda ubulele izwe lethu”

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The Best of Me : Pennylover “Forever”

My ego evaporates and steams my pride

My happiness dilutes my worries

My joy filters all my sorrows

My laughter eases the pain

My acceptance grows me from my mistakes

This is what makes me to be the best of me

I am that diamond in the rough places

Which friction and polish can make me sparkle?

I am that undiscovered gold

What fire and Lordship can make me pure?

I am that star in the middle of the dark sky that you normally miss

This is what makes me to be the best of me

I am me because of the talents invested in me

I am me because of the elements stored in me

I am me because of the uniqueness produced by me

I am me because of wounded-ness felt by me

I am me because I have learned that I have me

To make me the best of me

Mother love letter : Patricia Sibanyoni “Lady P”

My child “Tinyiko”You may not know me when you were inside my stomach but I knew everything about you I knew you when you started sitting downAnd when you started opening your eyesFirst time in the world even every teeth in your mouthI knew about it I am the one who noticed how many there were And the first to come out.For all the days of your development are written in my diary. I chose a name for you when you were inside my wombThat is why I called you “Gift” becauseA child is a gift from GodI am not distant and angry, but I am completely expressing my loveSo that you can grow on how to love, and it is my desire to show you my love my child.Mother is a provider that meets all your needsMy plans for your future are good plansI don’t want to see you suffer, all I want is to see you happy like other childrenUntil you grow up to face the challenges in life Sometimes rivers of life will flow, sometimes they won’tPlease know that the great encourager is your mom and God Please make sure in everything that you do Trust in the Lord because he offers you more than your earthly father can do. And He is the father who comforts you in all your troubles and heartbrokenHe is close to you as I am. My child I have received the gift when you were born and nothing will ever separate you from my loveI will always be a mother to youMy question is will you be able to overcome life challenges? But I trust that you will my lovely kid..........................................Yours sincerelyYour beloved mom

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I Matter : Elizabeth Phala

I see the floods of mishaps

Tears run down my face

Trying to understand the word; “Life”

But I told myself that “I matter”

My life was like seasons of the year

Sunshine in spring depicts life is blossoming

But I find opposite winter with its coma seasons

But I tried still; I carry on because I matter

I push till I reach autumn where I shed emotions

Emotions of hatred, bitterness, anger and shame

Shedding of emotions became a hobby

Because when I look back, I keep on doing the same thing

But still I persist because I matter

In my journey of summer I discovered me

Life was a green symbol of life and energy

It was my reincarnation because I found me

I discovered me because I matter

Watch my space, the energy here is amazing

I am like a star Neptune falling from the galaxy

Star of hope, happiness and living life to the fullest

All because I matter!

Life is a Highway : Xolani Gladwell Khumalo

There was a boy called XolaniThis boy was raised by his grandmother because his mother had left him when he was three months old.After eight years that is when he was moved to a place called Ekangala, where they were living with his aunt and he was at school and it was very tough for him, because when he was from school he would eat left over’s of food whilst other will eat fresh food. When he asked they would tell him your mother does not even buy food for you, she is just a bitch. The boy started to steal money at home and he was beaten by his aunt.After he reached 14 years he started to work at the tuck shop called Mamsie tuck shop so that he could raise money for school trips and eat like others at home. He was a sports person. When he arrived from training he did not even get food. When he started to be independent, he had developed and harboured a lot of anger. As time went by, he dropped out of school and joined other gangsters in the community. That is where he learnt to become this strong person, and confronted challenges and situations head on and that is how the personality type eight devel-oped.

Today I know in life is hard!

To succeed in this life,

You have to be the strongest

As years go by

Sometimes the road is level

Sometimes the hills are high to climb

But self-confidence can make you reach your vision

To combat other challenges you need to be independent

Because life is not a movie, there is no director in life

Life is Highway

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A girl who is lonely : Wendy Sibanyoni

I am a girl who is lonely. I have no one to talk to. Having a family of seven with one parent and she was the only one who was working. What does that mean; it means sometimes we have some difficulties, and sometimes we went to bed without food.That is where as a girl I started to think of other people and forgot about myself and even forgot about my personal goal or to look after myself. I did not understand what was good for me and what was not good for me. Now I started of thinking how, I can get money, what I must do in order to be independent. Besides, I have seen that my parents are suffering. Having to go work without eating is sad.

Then I started dating bigger guys than me so that I can get some money and buy food. That is how I ended up falling pregnant at the early age and I had to quit school. I found myself in an abusive relationship, but I did not see that because I was getting the money to buy food.

I was not aware that I was surrounded by people who are truly lovely and helpers. I don’t know how it happened, but I made a decision to connect with those people, luckily they gave me some advice. That is when I realised that I don’t care much about me. I was doing stupid things, and I was still young. I had to learn to put my life first and that no one will do that for me.One day they took me to some of the community services, they said, “wow” girl you have done such a good work, keep it up, that is when I realised that I can help people, and I can work so hard and they were always going with me to some com-munity events. I joined the organisation called Buffalo Home based Care. I enjoy the work.

Again came another organisation in my community called CSVR, again I joined. But I did not understand what was it all about, but with time, I understood, what the organisation was all about; violence prevention. We had some dialogues with the community again about violence and prevention, we had team building activi-ties, we had some workshops and trainings on psychosocial wellness, and the team was so powerful than beforeI like the training because they really helped me a lot, the training was all about myself and not others, for example, we learnt about the River of Life technique and I did my own river of life. That is where I took out the painful things in my life, and put them down on paper. I learnt that holding a painful past experience was not going to help me. I was wounded; I had amanxeba abhibhidlayo (sceptic wounds).

After all the trainings, that was where I started my life, went to school, looked after myself, told myself that I love to be me and I appreciated myself.

The Game Nine : Peace and Harmony:Bongane Shabalala

It was 1985 when he was born, a baby boy that looked like an angel, a handsome boy. He had both parents and three sisters. They were staying in North Pretoria near a township called Ekangala.

His father was not working, so he was just trying to get a job or work, his mother was working.

At the time everything was good. As time went by, the boy started to go to school in Limpopo, where he had moved to Limpopo with his grandmother. So he moved with him. He was a peace maker because wherever he was, he made sure that he did not start or cause conflict.

Because he was a man of people he worked with community. The first time that he worked with a Non Governmental Organisation (NGO) was in year 2009. He participated in training provided by “Father Speak Out”. However, back then he was a bad guy, so because of friends and the love of things of the world. He stopped all the wrong things that he was doing because; “Peace and Harmony” wanted him to do what he was born to do.

Father Speak Out taught him how to engage in and with life. He started working with different NGO`s, like Love Life, Local Drug Action Committee, South Af-rican Men’s Action Group, National Association of People living With HIV and AIDS and African National Congress. As a result of his proactiveness and idealistic mind, everyone had that respect on him.

And later on, he had a family, wife and son life was like good as he still maintained Peace and Harmony.

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My Story : David Vincent Mahlangu

I am Vincent David Mahlangu. I was born on the 14th March 1987. I was staying at Hammerskral with my old grandmother. My grandmother passed away on the 22nd June 1997. I couldn’t believe that my grandmother had passed away. I went to live with my family; my mother, father, two sisters and two brothers.

It is when my life started to change as I was treated like an animal, when a person doesn’t think you are a human being. My life was not good at all, because I was hurt by my father, he used to say to me “you are a dog”, “you are stupid” and “you are not my son”.

I asked myself what I did to my father to deserve that kind of treatment. I prayed to God to help me. I wanted to do things with my father; I love my father, because he is my father. But when my mother was not home, I did not eat and my father did not talk to me. He will beat me up. When I grew up, I started to live my own life, I became a parent to myself, so I ended up in bad situations I became addicted to drugs.

The reason I took drugs was because I wanted to change something in my life. My life was up and down. I also got involved in crime to make money to buy Nyaope drug. Over the years, I turned to Marijuana and Nyaope under false belief that it would allow me to escape my problems. But, it just made things worse. I kept saying to myself I am going to stop permanently, and I smiled again when I left the world of drugs.

Difficult as it may be to face ones problems, the consequences of drug use are al-ways worse that the problem one is trying to solve by smoking or taking them. The real answer is to get the facts, knowledge and not to take drugs in the first place.I continuously thought about the danger and damage that a person can cause after taking drugs. Sometimes, drugs blur the memory, causing blank spots when I try to get information through this cloudy mess. I told myself that I will not do drugs again. Drugs were making me slow, stupid and caused me to fail in life. I met Xola-ni Gladwell Khumalo who told me about NGO`s and youth desk. I went to the police station with Xolani where they welcomed well and I was happy. I joined the youth desk, and then I met Sibongiseni Gumpe and Busi who supported me.

After that I met Sikhathele Nkala, Tsholofelo Sesanga from the Centre for the Study of Violence and Reconciliation and formed the Ekangala advisory group with others from the community I started a new life with new people in my life. I started being recognised in the community and people were happy for me. I became stronger and more powerful.

My Life as a Helper in the Community : Case Study: Elizabeth Phala

I met this lady in June 2014 and her name is Mary Batlong (not her real name)She resides in Section 173 in Ekangala.

She is married to Mr Mahlangu (not his real name) under the customary marriage and is still using her maiden surname.

Mary had a crisis in adopting a step grand-daughter.This story goes back to 2013 when the daughter of Mr Mahlangu came and gave them the custody of their child, without proper custody of the court; she was four years old and in a spur of the moment, Mr Mahlangu passed on. To our amazement the lady was married to someone and was using his surname and the child used another surname other than the maternal mother. It was a serious issue and the grandfather also passed on later in November 2013.

Her problems became more as she was not getting help because she did not have powers as her surname is different and the husband was threatening her. In March after consulting with me I referred her to a Social Worker in Ekangala. The social worker looked at the best interest of the child since the child was close to Mary. Sadly, the new home and the step father was not good for the child. They arranged with the court and got the custody. As we thought, it was over; she applied for fos-ter grant because she is unemployed and had no income. This was dragging on and on the other side; she could not pay the school fees for Pre School. In June 2014, I saw her and she explained everything to me.

Then I called a Community Development Worker in our ward, I explained ev-erything to her. Afterwards, she intervened by arranging for food parcels and she called in a social worker to help her. That is how she started getting food parcels in the middle of August 2014. She is happy now and living with her granddaughter and now everything is in good conditions.

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The Inner Critic : Mpho Chavura

“I call it the joy villain

The twister of good facts

That you think about yourself

The bad things that you think about

Without you noticing

If you’ve never heard about it

it binds you to your negativity response to yourself”

Community Awaken : Tsamme Mfundisi

Give me back my yesterday, I am today,

Standing still in the dusty areas of Mzansi

Wakeup – Wakeup.

I am priceless; I might not look pretty,

But I give life to the lifeless,

Looking at you from afar feels like I’m miles away from you

Wakeup – Wakeup.

Mothers, Fathers, Children together we celebrate your breath,

The spirit of living and walking in the noisy street,

I enjoy the delight of Ubuntu, Laughter and Love

Wakeup – Wakeup.

Sorrow and Tears may come but they don’t stay forever,

Service Delivery Protests, Violence, Killings are part of the daily living,

But I don’t get discouraged by these events

Wakeup – Wakeup.

The outcome of having life and joy, celebrations and ululations is the

order of our days,

I have drunk all your passion, devotion and Living unity,

Move outside the tangle of fear-thinking

Wakeup – Wakeup.

You who has produced lots of doctors, nurses, community practitioners

and lots more,

Making a Difference: Engage - Inspire – Empower!

Community Awaken…!

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Conclusion

The group that left at the end of the four-phase psychosocial wellness training was a different group from the one we met during phase one of the programme. During the course of the programme, they were truly transformed. This is reflected by one of the member’s comments: “I have been a learner all along; now I am able to teach others, help them discover their true essence and find their freedom too.”

The facilitators observed a few things about the group, which contributed to this remarkable transformation:

• A very real sense of trust and understanding developed among the participants — this allowed the whole group to go “deep” in their sharing. Each and every participant was fully engaged and contributed openly about themselves and their learning.

• Participants gave each other direct feedback and shared their opinions and advice with each other. This happened very organically, and was very exciting.

• During the check-ins on some days, participants shared how they were seeing real and tangible shifts in their lives, especially in their relationships with each other, and in how they were engaging with the community.

• Participants really “got” the concepts that were introduced through the pro-gramme – they seemed to internalise them to such an extent that it felt as though they themselves had introduced them (rather than the facilitators!). It often felt as though they were leading facilitators to the next activity.

CSVR believes that the spaces we create for self discovery contribute directly to better understanding of ourselves and others – and thereby contribute to the individual and collective healing necessary for our country. CSVR aims to continue to work with communities to encourage this healing and to combat violence and conflict. We invite others to join us so that we may work together to “build societies that are peaceful, equal and free of violence.”

In Ekangala, an action group comprising of fifteen young people was set up in 2012 to lead implementation of activities aimed at dealing with violence in this community.

This action group consists of eight males and seven females all drawn from local organisations. The action group works in collaboration with local stakeholders; community, traditional and religious leaders and service providers in addressing violence and providing psychosocial support to victims of violence. Also, the Ac-tion Group regularly attends meetings organised by other Community Based Or-ganizations to share knowledge and lessons drawn from their direct violence pre-vention interventions. This has ensured the establishment of strong and strategic alliances with potential community allies which has in turn built great momentum for change in Ekangala. In addition, the Group works in schools where they pro-vide training and dialogue with learners on causes of different forms of violence common in schools; (cyber violence and bullying, sexual harassment etc) and the impact of violence on learners.

Work done by Ekangala Community Action Group