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UPPER GRADESBorderlines. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Christina Hamlett 2

DRAMATIZED CLASSIC(FOR UPPER GRADES)

The Canterville Ghost. . . . . . . . . . . . . . .Oscar Wilde 12Adapted by Walter Hackett

MIDDLE AND LOWER GRADESOnce Upon a Mayflower . . . . . . . . . . . . Pamela Love 23The Magic Wishing Ring. . . . . . . . . . Gwen Chaloner 29Wanted: A House to Haunt. . . . . . . Hazel W. Corson 35Armadillo’s Choice. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .Pamela Love 39Rebecca Motte: American Patriot. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

Tara Wise Montgomery 43

PlaysOCTOBER 2016

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Terms of Use • Vol. 76, No. 1

PlaysOctober 2016

The drama magazine for young people

What’s in this issue. . .

Upper GradesBorderlines, by Christina Hamlett8 actors: 5 female,1 male, and 2 male/female; 30 minutes. Heartbreaking portraitof the struggles and hardships of immigrants to America and the harsh realities ofa complex immigration system, as seen when an aunt from Central America comesto California for a family wedding.

The Canterville Ghost, by Oscar Wilde, and adapted by Walter Hackett10 actors: 4 female, 2 male, 4 male/female; 25 minutes. A DramatizedClassic/Reader’s Theatre: In this good-humored “ghost” story, the Otis family’skindhearted daughter finds a way for curmudgeonly ghost haunting their house tofinally be able to rest in peace.

Middle and Lower GradesOnce Upon a Mayflower, by Pamela Love22+ actors: 7 male, 7 female, 8 male or female; 10 minutes. A large-cast play: Theexciting story of the Pilgrims’ ocean voyage on theMayflower to the New World, asrecorded by Pilgrim leader William Bradford in 1620.

The Magic Wishing Ring, by Gwen Chaloner17 actors: 4 male, 3 female, and 10 male/female; 15 minutes. A large-castplay: Nouns, verbs, adjectives, and the other five parts of speech are exploredin this fun tale of pixie dust and imagination.

Wanted: A House to Haunt, by Hazel W. Corson14+ actors: 3 male, 2 female, 9 male/female; 15 minutes. Friendly ghost isfaced with finding a new home at Halloween when his host family moves froma big old creaky house to a new apartment.

Armadillo’s Choice, by Pamela Love6 actors: male/female; 10 minutes. Animals meet in the desert and learn to respecttheir differences, without asking each other to change the way they are.

Rebecca Motte: American Patriot, by Tara Wise Montgomery5 actors: 3 male, 2 female; 15 minutes. South Carolina patriot sacrifices her plan-tation home during the Revolutionary War to help the Colonial Army defeat theBritish.

OCTOBER 2016 1

Angled right is a freestanding door-way with door that opens inward.Down left is a table with a computermonitor, paperwork, and two chairsfacing each other. A freestanding door-way is behind the table. American flaghangs above doorway. A third door-way is up right of the kitchen.Additional entrances/exits are madedown left. The center aisle is also used.

AT RISE: Soft spotlight comes up onopen door right, where we see entwinedsilhouettes of MARISSA and RAMON.

MARISSA (Giggling): Ramon, stop! Ihave to go.

RAMON: Uno más! It’s early.

MARISSA: No más! It’s nearly mid-night.

RAMON (Laughing): What differencedoes it make? (Bright porch light sud-denly comes on directly above them.)

MARISSA (Hurriedly): I’ll see you to-morrow. (She pushes him away,smooths her hair and clothes, andsteps inside. As she closes door, lightscome up on kitchen, where FRANCIA,

Upper Grades

BorderlinesTouching portrait of the struggles and hardships of

immigrants to America, and the harsh realities of a

complex immigration system. . .

by Christina Hamlett

MARISSA MUÑOZ, spoiled teenager

RAMON, her bad-news boyfriend

FRANCIA MUÑOZ, Marissa’s mid-

dle-aged mother

ROSALIE MUÑOZ, Francia’s older

daughter, 20’s

HOLTON, Dept. of Homeland

Security official

ANITA GUERRERO, Francia’s mid-

dle-aged sister

KAT JACKSON

JAY RICHARDS

(Casting note: Although Francia andAnita are not twins, they must be simi-lar enough in height, weight and haircolor/style for purposes of the plot.)

TIME: The present.

SETTING: Los Angeles. A simple set andisolated lighting convey different loca-tions without having to use backdrops.At center is a small kitchen with tableand chairs, counter, sink, and hutch.

Characters

2 PLAYS • playsmagazine.com

Borderlines is protected by U.S. copyright law.It is unlawful to use this play in any way unlessyou are a current subscriber to PLAYSMagazine (www.playsmagazine.com).

Immigration &Customs Enforce-ment agents

in a bathrobe, is standing at the table,holding a mop that’s in a bucket.)

FRANCIA (Quiet but firm): ¿Qué hora es?

MARISSA: Huh?

FRANCIA (Louder): ¿Qué hora es?

MARISSA (Shrugging): I don’t know.Maybe—uh—9:30?

FRANCIA: It is nearly midnight andwell past the time for you to be in bed.

MARISSA: No problemo. I’m on my way.(She starts toward upstage doorway.FRANCIA wearily resumes mopping.)

FRANCIA: Where were you tonight?

MARISSA: Out. With friends.

FRANCIA: I was worried. I tried to call.

MARISSA: I must have had my phoneturned off.

FRANCIA: Why do you lie to me,Marissa? You were out with that boyagain.

MARISSA (Angrily): BoyFRIEND! Andhis name is Ramon. How many timeshave I told you?

FRANCIA: And how many times have Itold you he runs with a bad crowd?

MARISSA: You don’t know him like Ido!

FRANCIA: I know that you deservemuch better.

MARISSA: So you stay up late to spy onme?

FRANCIA: No, I stay up late to clean thehouse like you should have done while

Rosalie and I were at work. Have youforgotten my sister arrives fromHonduras tomorrow? (ROSALIE, in arobe, emerges from upstage doorway.)

MARISSA: How can I when it’s all youtalk about?!

ROSALIE: ¿Qué pasa? Why all theshouting?

MARISSA (Pointing at FRANCIA): Shedoesn’t want me to have a life! (Shepushes past ROSALIE to exit upstage.FRANCIA shakes her head as ROS-ALIE crosses to try to take the mop.)

ROSALIE: It’s late, Mama, and we needto get up in a couple of hours.

FRANCIA: Your sister worries me. Diosmio! I don’t know what to do.

ROSALIE: Well, it’s nothing to be solvedtonight. You need your sleep.

FRANCIA: But I want the house to lookperfect!

ROSALIE: It already does becauseyou’re in it and she loves you.

FRANCIA: But I’ve only a little more todo.

ROSALIE: Then let me finish it for you.Tomorrow is a big day. (Reluctantly,FRANCIA hands her the mop.)

FRANCIA: Te amo, Rosalie. You are atreasure. (They hug as lights go out. Aspotlight comes up at table left, whereHOLTON sits at computer. ANITAGUERRERO sits opposite him, a suit-case on the ground next to her. AsHOLTON types away, ANITA takes alook at her watch.)

HOLTON (Snarkily): Are we keepingyou from something?

OCTOBER 2016 3

ANITA (Pleasantly): No, no, SeñorHolton. I simply had no idea it wouldtake so long.

HOLTON (As he continues typing): I’msure you didn’t.

ANITA: I had hoped to be at my sister’swhen she gets home. She and my niecework in the Garment District down-town. Did I mention that?

HOLTON: Uh-huh.

ANITA: They are working extra hoursto save for my niece’s wedding. Such apretty bride she’ll be! Would you like tosee a picture?

HOLTON: Not really.

ANITA (Happily looking around): Thisis my first time to Los Angeles. It isvery beautiful.

HOLTON (Nonplussed): You’re not evenout of the airport.

ANITA: Then it speaks even better ofwhat awaits when I step outside!

HOLTON: A few more questions. Youstate that your full and legal name isAnita Maria Ruiz Guerrero?

ANITA: Sí. That is correct.

HOLTON: According to your documenta-tion, you were born in Mexico but cur-rently hold Honduran citizenship?

ANITA: Sí. I changed my citizenshipwhen I married my husband.

HOLTON: And what is his occupation?

ANITA: Oh, we were only together ashort time. When I was very young.

HOLTON: And his present whereabouts?

ANITA (Laughing): I rarely knewwhere he was when we were married.How should I know where he is now?

HOLTON: Are you gainfully employed,Mrs. Guerrero? (Noticing her puzzledlook, he speaks slowly.) Do. You. Have.A. Job?

ANITA: Not a regular job, Señor Holton.I do what is called the—uh—freelanceand sew clothes for people in theirhomes.

HOLTON (With suspicion): So in otherwords you could walk away at any timeyou wanted?

ANITA: Why should I do that when it iswork that I truly love? (She indicatesher outfit.) I also make all of my ownclothes. (She waits for a complimentthat doesn’t come.)

HOLTON: The relative you plan to staywith while you’re here. . .you state thather name is Francia Carmen RuizMuñoz and she is the mother of twodaughters, ages 23 and 16.

ANITA: Sí.

HOLTON: And Mr. Muñoz—what doeshe do?

ANITA (Sadly, crossing herself): He hasbeen gone since Marissa—the youngergirl—was first born. Francia—my sis-ter—has raised them by herself.

HOLTON: Uh-huh. (Types some more)And the supposed purpose of your visitto L.A., Mrs. Guerrero?

ANITA: It is to help my niece Rosaliesew her wedding dress. My sisterworks very long hours and—

HOLTON (Handing her paperwork): I’llneed you to sign these documents. (As


she signs each one, he affixes a rubberstamp. He then collects them andhands her a piece of paper.) Under theterms of your temporary guest visa,you’ll be allowed to stay for six weeksand not a single second longer.

ANITA: Six weeks is not a very longtime. (He stares at her, stony-faced.She continues, cheerfully.) Then it is agood thing I can sew muy pronto, si?(KAT JACKSON emerges from door-way behind HOLTON. She sips a cupof coffee.)

HOLTON (To ANITA as he points left):The exit’s that way.

ANITA: Then I am free to go? (He nodsand shoos her away.)

HOLTON: Sheesh! Why can’t they juststay where they belong?

KAT: Problem?

HOLTON: The one that just left? I’dkeep an eye on her if I were you.

KAT: Oh?

HOLTON: If you ask me, she’s a little toohappy to be here.

KAT: Is that such a crime?

HOLTON (Smugly): Not until she com-mits one. (The spotlight goes out.Knock on door is heard. Lights comeup right as ROSALIE crosses to opendoor to ANITA.)

ROSALIE (Excitedly): Tía! Bienvenido!

ANITA (Hugging her): Rosalie! Howbeautiful you are!

ROSALIE (Taking suitcase): We werestarting to worry.

ANITA: At least I’m here now. Where’syour mother? (FRANCIA emerges fromupstage door and rushes to greetANITA with tears of joy.) Francia!

FRANCIA: Anita!

ROSALIE (Patting suitcase): I’ll just putthis in Mama’s room. (As she exitsupstage and lights come up, FRANCIAleads ANITA to the kitchen. A cakeand plates are on the table.)

FRANCIA: I made a cake. Your favorite!Come sit and tell me about your trip.

ANITA (Puzzled): Where’s Marissa? Notstill at school?

FRANCIA (Visibly upset): She has beendating someone. Un hombre muy malo.

ANITA: She’s too young to be dating aboy, especially a very bad one.

FRANCIA (As she serves cake): Trytelling that to her.

ANITA: Perhaps I will. (The lights godown. Cell phone ringing is heard.Spotlight comes up in center aisle.MARISSA contemplates her phone asRAMON looks on.)

RAMON: Don’t answer.

MARISSA: It’s Rosalie. She never callsunless it’s important.

RAMON: What’s more important thanus? (He tries to cuddle her and makeher laugh while she’s on the call.)

MARISSA (Answering phone): Hola. . . .No, I didn’t forget. I’ve been busy. . . .Idon’t know when. When I get there,that’s when. . . .No, I’m not with Ramon.Why all the questions? Silencio! I’m nota child! No! I have to go! (She ends thecall.) My family thinks you’re bad for me.

OCTOBER 2016 5

RAMON: I think they’re bad for you. Weshould run away.

MARISSA: Run where?

RAMON: What does it matter if we’retogether?

MARISSA: Oh, Ramon! You say thesweetest things! (She throws her armsaround his neck as spotlight goes out.A soft light comes up on the kitchen. Asewing machine and basket are on din-ing table. FRANCIA, dressed for work,is draping wedding dress fabric overthe back of one of the chairs as a sleepyANITA, in a bathrobe, emerges fromupstage doorway. FRANCIA sees her.)

FRANCIA: Mi corazón! I did not mean towake you.

ANITA: I was too excited to sleep, think-ing about Rosalie’s dress. (She crossesto look at fabric.)

FRANCIA: I’ve made coffee. Let me getyou some.

ANITA: Do you always get up this early?

FRANCIA: To get downtown, we musttake a train and two buses.

ANITA: It would be faster with a car.

FRANCIA (Wistfully): If only! (ROS-ALIE, dressed for work, enters upstageand takes her coffee cup to sink.)

ROSALIE: Good morning, Tía. Did yousleep well?

ANITA: Dreaming of my sobrina’s per-fect wedding day!

ROSALIE: Come on, Mama. We’ll belate. (They hug goodbyes and exit.ANITA beams at sewing machine,excited to start. The lights go down

and a spotlight comes up in centeraisle on KAT and her co-worker JAYRICHARDS as they drink coffee.)

JAY: All I’m sayin’ is, when does it stop?

KAT: When does what stop?

JAY: They just keep pourin’ in here dayafter day, year after year. It’s like anoisy, drippy faucet that won’t shut off.

KAT: What about the American dreamand coming here for something better?

JAY: More like the American night-mare. There’s gonna be nothin’ left foranyone born here. You think my kidsare gonna be able to get a job?

KAT: You don’t have any kids, Jay.

JAY: Come on, Kat, I’m bein’ hypothet-ical here. What’s wrong with lockin’ thedoors and tellin’ ’em all to go home?

KAT: Some of them don’t have a hometo go to.

JAY: Pffft! That is so not my problem.

KAT (After a beat): You’re not a peopleperson, are you? (Spotlight goes out onthem. Soft light comes up on stageright door as ANITA is entering with abag of groceries. Lights come up onkitchen to reveal MARISSA andRAMON at the table sharing a bottleof soda. We can see that progress hasbeen made on the dress.)

MARISSA (Jumping up): Tía! What areyou doing here?

ANITA: I’ve been living here the pastthree weeks. . .or have you been too“busy” to notice?

MARISSA: This is my boyfriend, Ramon.(Indifferent, RAMON drinks his soda.)


ANITA: Did school let out early today?

MARISSA: Um. . .yes.

ANITA: What about your school,Ramon? Or are you old enough towork? (RAMON ignores her. ANITAaddresses MARISSA.) You know yourmother’s rule about not having anyoneover when no one’s here.

MARISSA (Shrugging): You’re here.

ANITA: Yes, I am. And I need your helpwith the groceries. (MARISSA starts tomove but RAMON grabs her wrist.)

RAMON: She’s not the boss of you.(MARISSA gives him a pleading look,pulls her wrist away and goes to takegroceries.)

ANITA (To RAMON): You remind me ofsomeone. Someone I did not like verymuch. Oh yes, I remember. My ex-hus-band. Many years ago I told him toleave my house. Just as I am nowtelling you to leave this one. (RAMONtakes his time standing up. He glancesdown at the wedding dress and startsto touch it.) Don’t touch that. (RAMONsmirks, looks at MARISSA and startsto hold his soda bottle over the fabric.MARISSA rushes up to stop him.)

MARISSA: Ramon! No! You’ll ruin it!(He laughs, takes a swig of the sodaand strolls to the front door. He turnsto look at MARISSA and snaps his fin-gers. She looks at ANITA, then back athim.) Maybe later. (He shrugs andexits. MARISSA starts after him butANITA stops her.)

ANITA: Let him go. He is not worth it.

MARISSA (Sobbing): But I love him! Ilove him! (ANITA comforts her.)

ANITA: I know. I know it all too well.

(The lights go down onstage. A spot-light comes up in center aisle. A con-cerned ROSALIE has her arm arounda visibly fatigued FRANCIA.)

ROSALIE: You need to sit and rest amoment, Mama.

FRANCIA: But we’ll miss our bus home.

ROSALIE: There’ll be another one along.There always is.

FRANCIA: I don’t know what’s wrong. Ifelt fine this morning.

ROSALIE: You said that yesterday, too,and I know you’re not. You’re wearingyourself out.

FRANCIA: I’ll rest after the wedding.There’s still a lot to do. (Suddenlypoints) Our bus is turning the corner.If we run, we can catch it.

ROSALIE (Laughing): Mama, you’re notrunning—(FRANCIA grabs on toROSALIE as she sinks to the ground.ROSALIE screams.) Mama! (The spot-light goes out. Lights come up onkitchen table. A much subduedMARISSA is sewing beads on the veil.ANITA stands up with the dress, nowonly missing its sleeves and train.)

ANITA: We’ll need to clear the table fordinner. (She holds dress up to herself.)What do you think?

MARISSA: I wish I had a dress like that.

ANITA: And I wish that won’t be for avery long time.

MARISSA: Did you have a dress likeRosalie’s?

ANITA (Shaking head): We were tooeager to marry. I borrowed a nice dressfrom your mama. We’re the same size

OCTOBER 2016 7

and always liked to trade clothes. (Cellphone rings. MARISSA searchesunder the fabric for it, checks callerID.)

MARISSA: It’s Rosalie. (Answers phone)Hola. ¿Qué pasa? (Suddenly; in shock)What? What?! Oh, no! No! (Trembling,she hands phone to ANITA.) It’s Mama.They’re at the hospital.

ANITA (Into phone): Rosalie? (Listensthoughtfully) We’re on our way.(Lights out onstage. After a moment, aspotlight comes up on ROSALIE asshe emerges through upstage doorway.It’s clear she’s been crying. As shestarts toward kitchen, lights come upsoftly. ANITA approaches her, carry-ing two cups of coffee.) How is she?

ROSALIE: She wants to set her alarm soshe can go to work tomorrow. Sheshould have stayed in the hospital, butyou knowMama—she was afraid of theexpense.

ANITA: She needs to do what the doctorsaid and rest for at least a week.

ROSALIE: But she could lose her job ifshe’s gone that long. (MARISSA entersupstage.)

ANITA: There must be something wecan do.

MARISSA: Why don’t you just go towork in her place, Tía?

ROSALIE and ANITA (Ad lib): What?No, no. That’s not possible. (Etc.)

MARISSA: You look enough like Mamathat nobody would even notice.

ROSALIE: And if they did? No, Marissa,it’s too risky. Besides, how would shefind her way around a factory she’snever been to?

MARISSA: Because you and Mamahave always sat next to each other andkeep to yourselves. Nothing would lookdifferent.

ROSALIE: And if she got caught?

ANITA: Then I’ll just have to make sureI don’t.

ROSALIE: Tía! You’re not seriously con-sidering it?

ANITA: I won’t have my own sisterwork herself to death when she canstay here and get better. Besides, I’mnearly finished with your dress. I needsomething useful to do until I go home.The time will pass faster than youknow it. (The lights go down onstage.A spotlight comes up in the aisle wherea smug HOLTON has just walked upto KAT; he carries a file folder.)

HOLTON: Well, well, well, do I knowhow to call ’em, or what?

KAT: What are you talking about?

HOLTON: That chatty Guerrero womanfrom Honduras six weeks ago?Supposedly here to help out her sister?

KAT: What about her?

HOLTON (Handing her the folder): Hervisa expired two days ago and she has-n’t checked in yet. If the address inthere is legit, it’s time for you andRichards to make a little house call.(He exits toward back of theater asKAT opens folder. Spotlight goes out.Lights come up on kitchen. FRANCIA,in bathrobe, is at table, sewing.MARISSA, carrying books, is leaving.)

MARISSA: Can I get you anything afterschool, Mama?

FRANCIA: Gracias, but I have every-


thing I need. And even better, I feelwell enough to go back to work onMonday.

MARISSA (Laughing): If Tía Anita letsyou. If you don’t watch out, she’ll takeyour place permanently! (MARISSAkisses her mother goodbye and exits.After a few moments, there is a knockon door. FRANCIA goes to open it toKAT and JAY.)

JAY: Agent Richards. Agent Jackson.We’re with Immigration and CustomsEnforcement, Department of Home-land Security. Mind if we come in?(Without waiting for her to reply, hesteps inside. KAT follows.)

FRANCIA: Is something wrong?

KAT: We’re looking for a Ms. AnitaMaria Ruiz Guerrero.

JAY: Her visa expired two days ago.Care to tell us where she is? (FRAN-CIA looks from one to the other andclears her throat.)

FRANCIA: She’s right here in front of you.

KAT: You’re Ms. Guerrero?

FRANCIA: Sí. Yes. Yes, I am.

JAY (To KAT): Well, that was easy. (ToFRANCIA) You need to come with us.

FRANCIA (Bewildered): Right now?

JAY: Yeah, that’s the general idea.

FRANCIA (Indicating robe): But I amnot even—

JAY (Snidely): What part of this wasn’tclear?

KAT: Good grief, Jay. You want toparade her outside in her bathrobe?

(To FRANCIA) It’s all right. Go aheadand change your clothes. We’ll wait.(FRANCIA glances at JAY before hur-rying through upstage door.)

JAY (To KAT): Y’know if she goes out aback window, it’s all on you. (KAT rollsher eyes as lights go out. Phone ringingis heard. Spotlight comes up in centeraisle, where an anxious MARISSA ison her cell phone.)

MARISSA: Pick up. Pick up. Pick up.Hola, Rosalie. You have to come homeright away. It’s Mama. She’s gone. . . .She left a message in the bathroom.Two people came to get her. She toldthem she was Tía Anita. . . .I don’tknow why. But you have to come.Hurry! (Spotlight goes out, then spot-light up on stage down left. A nervousFRANCIA is seated at table. ROS-ALIE, accompanied by KAT, emergesfrom doorway.)

KAT (To ROSALIE): Two minutes. (Sheexits. ROSALIE rushes to sit down,looks over her shoulder, then back toFRANCIA.)

ROSALIE (In hushed whisper): Mama!Why did you tell them you were TíaAnita? It makes no sense.

FRANCIA: It is all right, Rosalie. Trustme.

ROSALIE: But, Mama! These people—they’re going to send you away the dayafter tomorrow. You need to tell themwho you really are. If you don’t tellthem, I will.

FRANCIA: And that will only make itworse. For all of us. The truth is famil-ia. In the end, it is all that matters.You know Anita would have done thesame for me. Please, Rosalie. Say noth-ing. It is all for the best. (KAT reap-pears in the doorway. ROSALIE

OCTOBER 2016 9

squeezes her mother’s hands andstands to go.)

ROSALIE (To KAT): My aunt would liketo be able to say goodbye to my motherand my younger sister.

KAT: You’re welcome to bring themhere if—

ROSALIE: My mother has been verysick and can’t travel. And my sister—Ijust can’t bring her to a place like this.

KAT (After a pause): I’ll see what I cando. (With a weak smile, ROSALIEblows a kiss to her mother and exits asthe light goes out. After a moment, thelight comes up on ROSALIE andMARISSA seated at the kitchen table.)

MARISSA (Tearfully): It isn’t fair. Youshould have done something. Youshould have said something.

ROSALIE: There was nothing to do orsay, Marissa. It is what it is and fromnow on we must all play our parts.(Knock on door. ROSALIE opens it toFRANCIA and KAT.)

FRANCIA (To ROSALIE): How is she?

ROSALIE: She sleeps off and on but Itold her you were coming. I think itmade her happy. (FRANCIA looks toKAT, who nods, and FRANCIA exitsupstage. MARISSA crosses to KAT.)

MARISSA (Angrily): It’s not fair!

ROSALIE (Restraining her): Marissa!

MARISSA: You people have no heart, nosoul! You have no idea what you’redoing, pulling people’s lives apart likethis! She’s done nothing wrong!Nothing! Do you hear me?!

KAT: I’m very sorry.

MARISSA: Sorry?! What does thatmean? She only came here to help sewa dress and you’re treating her likeshe’s sowing seeds of destruction! She’sa good person! A good person! Do youeven know what that means?! Are youpeople that stupid?!

KAT (Quietly): Sometimes, regretfully,we are. (ROSALIE consoles a weepingMARISSA. ANITA emerges upstagecarrying her suitcase (and wearing thesame dress as FRANCIA).

ANITA: Well, I guess this is goodbye.(ROSALIE and MARISSA rush up toher as KAT looks on. ANITA address-es ROSALIE.) You will be a beautifulbride. (To MARISSA) And you, littleone, I need you to remember that badboys do not make good husbands. (ToKAT) I’m ready now. (ANITA startstoward the front door.)

KAT: Just a minute.

ANITA (Without looking in KAT’s direc-tion): Is something wrong? (You cancut the tension with a knife. Very slow-ly, KAY withdraws a business cardfrom her pocket and holds it out toROSALIE.)

KAT: My cousin is an immigrationlawyer in Long Beach. He may be ableto help. (ROSALIE takes the card asKAT escorts ANITA out. MARISSAcomes up to look at the card. FRAN-CIA—in a bathrobe—emerges from theupstage doorway to join them. Sheindicates the card ROSALIE holds.)

FRANCIA: What is it?

ROSALIE: It is hope, Mama. And maybeeven change. (The lights go down slow-ly.)

THE END

(Production Notes on next page)


Uno más (Ooh-no moss) — one more timeNo más (No moss) — no moreQué hora es (Kay orra ess) — what time is it?No problemo (No pro-blame-oh) — No problemQué pasa? (Kay pah-sa) — What’s up?Dios mio (DEE-ose mee-oh) — My GodTe amo (Tay AH-mo) — I love youSí (see) — yesMuy pronto (moo-ee PRONT-oh) — very fastTía (TEE-ah) — AuntBienvenido! (Bee-en-vay-NEE-doh) — Welcome!Un hombre (Oon OM-bray) — a young manMuy malo (MOO-ee MAL-oh) — very badHola (OH-la) — helloSilencio! (Sill-EN-see-oh) — Silence!Mi corazón (Mee core-ah-ZONE) —my loveSobrina (So-BREEN-ah) — nieceGracias (GRAH-see-ahs) — thank you

OCTOBER 2016 11

PRONUNCIATION/TRANSLATION GUIDE(listed in the order in which words/expressions appear in text)

PRODUCTION NOTESBorderlines

CHARACTERS: 5 female, 3 male. If needbe, the roles of Holton and Jay can beplayed by females.PLAYING TIME: 30 minutes.COSTUMES: Marissa is a wannabe fash-ionista. Ramon dresses like a gang mem-ber. Francia and Rosalie dress plainlybut neatly; wear bathrobes when indi-cated in text. Anita wears skirt, jacketand blouse in first scene. Holton wearssuit and tie; Kat and Jay wear blackslacks and polo shirts with ICE badges.SETTING: Los Angeles. A simple set andisolated lighting convey different loca-tions without having to use backdrops.At center is a small kitchen with tableand chairs, counter, sink, and hutch.

Angled right is a freestanding doorwaywith door that opens inward. Down leftis a table with a computer monitor,paperwork, and two chairs facing eachother. A freestanding doorway is behindthe table. American flag hangs abovedoorway. A third doorway is up right ofthe kitchen. Additional entrances/exitsare made down left. Center aisle is alsoused.PROPERTIES: Mop and bucket, suitcase,rubber stamp, cake, plates, sewingmachine, sewing basket, cups, coffee pot,fabric, cell phones, bag of groceries, par-tial wedding dress, veil, soda bottle, fold-er, books, business card.LIGHTING and SOUND: As indicated.

NARRATOR: When Mr. Hiram B. Otis,the American Minister to England,bought Canterville Chase, everyonetold him he was doing a very foolishthing, as there was no doubt the placewas haunted. Indeed, Lord Cantervillehimself had felt it his duty to mentionthe fact to Mr. Otis when they came todiscuss terms. (Music out.)

CANTERVILLE: We have not cared tolive in the place since my grandaunt,the Dowager Duchess of Bolton, wasfrightened into a fit.

MR. OTIS: A fit, you say, LordCanterville?

CANTERVILLE: It happened some yearsago. My aunt was dressing for dinner.Suddenly two skeleton hands wereplaced on her shoulders.

MR. OTIS: Oh, come now!

Dramatized Classic(Upper Grades)

The Canterville GhostIn this reader’s theatre piece, an American family

moves into a haunted manor house, has some fun

with a lonely ghost, and finds a way for this spirit to

rest in peace. . . .

by Oscar Wilde, adapted by Walter Hackett

LORD CANTERVILLE

HIRAM B. OTIS

MRS. LUCY OTIS

VIRGINIA, 15

WASHINGTON

JEFFERSON

MRS. UMNEY, housekeeper

GHOST

ELEANORE

NARRATOR

MUSIC: An eerie theme. Up and under.

Characters


The Canterville Ghost is protected byU.S. copyright law. It is unlawful to usethis play in any way unless you are acurrent subscriber to PLAYS Magazine

(www.playsmagazine.com).

12-year-oldtwins

CANTERVILLE: The ghost has been seenby several living members of my fami-ly. Lady Canterville often got very lit-tle sleep because of the mysteriousnoises that came from the corridor andthe library at night.

MR. OTIS: I come from a country wherewe don’t believe in ghosts.

CANTERVILLE: The ghost does exist. Ithas been well known for over threecenturies. It always makes its appear-ance just before the death of any mem-ber of our family.

MR. OTIS (Laughing): Well, so does thefamily doctor, for that matter. Butthere is no such thing as a ghost.

CANTERVILLE: If you don’t mind a ghostin the house, it is all right. Only youmust remember, Mr. Otis, I warnedyou.

MUSIC: Forte and under.

NARRATOR: A few weeks later Mr. Otisand his family took the train from Lon-don to Ascot, the nearest railroad stationto Canterville Chase. The Otises were arather formidable family of individuals.Mrs. Lucy Otis, for example, had a mag-nificent constitution and a wonderfulamount of animal spirits. Virginia, thedaughter, was lithe and lovely, and ascourageous a girl of fifteen as one couldfind. Then there were the twins, agetwelve, christened Washington andJefferson in a rash moment of parentalpatriotism. The twins were a bustlinglaw unto themselves. (Music out)As they drove from the station toCanterville Chase, the Otises were infine spirits. It was a lovely Julyevening. As they entered the avenue ofthe Chase, however, the sky suddenlybecame overcast. (Sound of rollingthunder is heard. It continues underNARRATOR.)

Before they reached the house, somebig drops of rain had fallen. The familywas greeted by Mrs. Umney, the agedhousekeeper, who had stayed on. Sheled them to the library, where tea hadbeen laid out. (Thunder out)

MRS. UMNEY: This room affords a fineview of the east garden and themeadow. It was Lord Canterville’sfavorite place for spending a quiet hour.

MR. OTIS: Very fine paneling, Mrs.Umney.

VIRGINIA: And all those wonderfulbooks.

WASHINGTON: Aw, this room’s toodark. Don’t you think so, Jeff?

JEFFERSON: Kind of spooky, I’d say,Wash.

MRS. OTIS: Over there by the fireplace,Mrs. Umney—I’m afraid somethinghas been spilt on the floor.

MRS. UMNEY (In a low voice): Yes,blood has been spilt on that spot.

MRS. OTIS: How horrid! I don’t care fora bloodstain in the library. It must beremoved at once.

MRS. UMNEY (Mysteriously): It is theblood of Lady Eleanore de Canterville,who was murdered on that very spot byher own husband, Sir Simon deCanterville, in 1575.

MR. OTIS: He wasn’t very neat about it!

MRS. UMNEY: Sir Simon survived hernine years and disappeared suddenlyunder very mysterious circumstances.His body has never been discovered,but his guilty spirit still haunts theChase. That bloodstain cannot beremoved.

OCTOBER 2016 13

WASHINGTON and JEFFERSON (To-gether): Gee! A real ghost!

MRS. OTIS: Nonsense! I mean aboutthat stain. I have something right herein my bag that will clean it up in notime. Pinkerton’s Champion StainRemover and Paragon Detergent.Watch closely.

MRS. UMNEY (Worried): It can’t beremoved, Mrs. Otis.

VIRGINIA: You don’t know my mother,Mrs. Umney. If she says it can beremoved, it can.

MRS. OTIS (As though scrubbing): Afew. . .brisk. . .rubs, and. . .off it comes.There you are! Clean as a whistle. (Pealof thunder is heard. MRS. UMNEYmoans. Sound of body hitting floor.)

VIRGINIA: Mrs. Umney! She’s fainted!

MR. OTIS: Here, boys, give me a handwith her. (Straining a bit) What amonstrous climate! I guess the oldcountry’s so overcrowded that theyhaven’t enough decent weather foreverybody. I have always been of theopinion that emigration is the onlything for England.

MRS. OTIS: Hiram, what can we do witha woman who faints?

MR. OTIS (Calmly): Charge it to her aswe do for breakage. She won’t faintafter that.

VIRGINIA: She’s coming to. (MRS.UMNEY sighs.) Are you all right now,Mrs. Umney?

MRS. UMNEY: Yes, all right now.(Sternly) But let me warn you. Trouble.It’s coming to this house. I have seenthings with my own eyes that wouldmake anyone’s hair stand on end.

Many a night I have not closed my eyesfor the awful things done here.(Another peal of thunder is heard.)

MUSIC: Mysterious. Up and downunder, to indicate passage of time.

JEFFERSON (Excitedly): Mother, it’sback again, the bloodstain on thelibrary floor.

MRS. OTIS: Take the stain remover andwipe it off.

JEFFERSON: But every time Wash and Iclean it off, the stain is there again thenext morning.

MRS. OTIS: Oh, nonsense!

JEFFERSON: But it’s the truth.

MRS. OTIS: Someone’s playing a joke.

MUSIC: Up and out, then sound ofclock striking 12 times.

MRS. OTIS (On third stroke): Hiram.(Pause) Hiram, are you awake?

MR. OTIS (Sleepily): Uhum-m-m!

MRS. OTIS: That stain, I don’t under-stand. It was there again this morning.(Clanking of chains is heard in the dis-tance. It gets louder as they talk.)

MR. OTIS: Not very nice to spoil thefloor that way.

MRS. OTIS: You don’t suppose—oh, butthat’s sheer nonsense. (She pauses.)Hiram, listen. (Clanking gets louder.)Sounds like chains being dragged.

MR. OTIS (Very calmly): Oh, my! I wasafraid of this.

MRS. OTIS: Where are you going? Whatare you looking for?


MR. OTIS: You’ll see. Follow me. And bequiet. (Sound of door opening, then rattleof chains. GHOST gives a hollowgroan.)

MRS. OTIS (Pleasantly): Why, it’s theCanterville Ghost. Good evening.(GHOST moans.)

MR. OTIS (Briskly): My dear sir, I real-ly must insist upon your oiling thosechains, and I have brought you for thatpurpose a small bottle of TammanyRising Sun Lubricator. It is said to becompletely efficacious upon one appli-cation. There are several testimonialsto that effect on the wrapper from someof our most eminent native divines. Ishall leave it here for you on the table.Should you require more, I shall behappy to supply you.

MRS. OTIS (Sweetly): And now goodnight. (Sound of door closing. GHOSTgroans in rage and disappointment.He grunts. Bottle is dashed to the floor.Another door opens.)

WASHINGTON: There he is, Jeff. Quick.

JEFFERSON: Come on! (Sound of some-one being hit with pillows) Stop tryingto duck, Mr. Ghost.

WASHINGTON: Sure! Being hit with pil-lows shouldn’t bother you.

JEFFERSON: Not much, that is.(GHOST moans in rage; sound ofchains rattling)

WASHINGTON: Hold still. (Rattle startsto fade away.)

JEFFERSON: Hey, come back.

WASHINGTON: Did you see that?

JEFFERSON: He disappeared rightthrough the wainscoting.

WASHINGTON: I can see the CantervilleGhost hasn’t any sense of humor.

MUSIC: Eerie theme, up briefly and out.

GHOST (Fuming): Never in my brilliantand uninterrupted career as a ghosthave I been so grossly insulted.Zounds!

ELEANORE: I pray thee, Sir Simon, con-trol thyself. If thee should ask me, Iwould say thou art guilty of exaggera-tion.

GHOST: Milady Eleanore, I did notrequest your opinion. And further-more, stop using that archaic English.

ELEANORE: I merely said—

GHOST: As my wife you are not entitledto any opinion. When I murdered you,I thought I was rid of you once and forall. My allowing you to return tem-porarily from your grave is just a cour-tesy.

ELEANORE: Concerning theseAmericans from the Colonies—

GHOST (Patiently): The Colonies nolonger belong to England. They arenow part of the United States. As forthese Otises, who offer me lubricatingoil for my chains and who throw pil-lows at my head, I shall be revenged onthem.

ELEANORE: What disguise wilt thou—Imean, will you—wear the next time?

GHOST: Perhaps that of Gaunt Gibeon,the Bloodsucker of Bexley Moor.

ELEANORE (Eagerly): May I accompanyyou?

GHOST: A woman’s place is in thehome.

OCTOBER 2016 15

MUSIC: “Rule Britannia.” Up and out.

WASHINGTON: Can you see him?

JEFFERSON: Yes. Right by the head ofthe stairs. (Pause) What’s he doing?

WASHINGTON: Trying to climb intothat suit of armor. Let’s get closer.Quiet as you can, Jeff. (A crash isheard. GHOST yowls in pain.)

JEFFERSON (Laughing): Look—the suitof armor fell over on him.

WASHINGTON: Let’s give it to him.(Blowing of breath is heard, as thoughusing a pea shooter. GHOST yowls.)

JEFFERSON: You got him. Now it’s myturn. (Another quick blowing ofbreath. GHOST yowls. Door opens.)

MRS. OTIS (Coming in): What are youtwo doing out of bed?

JEFFERSON: Look—the ghost.

WASHINGTON: Mother, we’re using ourpea shooters on him. Watch! (Blowingof breath. GHOST yowls.)

MR. OTIS (Coming in): Mr. CantervilleGhost!

MRS. OTIS: Hiram, what are you doing,pointing that revolver at the ghost’shead?

MR. OTIS: In the name of the UnitedStates Government, I command you tosurrender. (GHOST gives an echoing,ghostly laugh, like a madman.)

MRS. OTIS: I am afraid you are far fromwell. If you will wait, I’ll bring yousome medicine for that indigestion.You will find it a most excellent reme-dy.

MUSIC: Ironic theme. Up briefly andout.

GHOST: If only I could have climbedinto that suit of armor before they putin an appearance.

ELEANORE: That suit never did fit you.

GHOST: Lady Eleanore, I wore thatsame suit of armor at the Kenilworthtournament three hundred years ago.The Queen herself told me what anexcellent fit it was. Oh, my shins. Rubsome more balm on them.

ELEANORE: Wherever did thou—Imean, where did you get the idea towear the armor?

GHOST: Oh, from reading a silly poemabout a skeleton in armor. Written bysome American chap namedLongfellow. Ouch! My foot! Be careful!

ELEANORE: What will you do next?

GHOST: I’ll first need a rest aftertonight’s fiasco. Perhaps the next timeI’ll take you with me.

ELEANORE (Happily): Oh, splendid, SirSimon! But I haven’t a thing to wear.Ah, I have it: I’ll not wear my head.

MUSIC: A ghostly theme. Up and out.

GHOST (Nervously): Now, you’re quitepositive you know what to do?

ELEANORE: I am to go to Mr. and Mrs.Otis’ room and gibber at them from thefoot of the bed.

GHOST: Meanwhile I will go to thetwins’ bed and sit on their chests. Atthe same time I will stab myself threetimes in the throat.

ELEANORE: And what of the girl?


GHOST: Virginia? She has never insult-ed me. A few hollow groans should do itfor her. (Hall clock strikes twice.)

ELEANORE: Are we off?

GHOST: Not a sound out of you untilthe right moment. This must come as agrim surprise. (Pause) Straight downthe hallway.

ELEANORE (Suddenly): Sir Simon!Look—straight ahead. (She screams.)

GHOST: It’s . . . it’s a . . . ghost. Holdinga sword.

ELEANORE (Frightened): We mustleave. I’m frightened.

GHOST: You’re quite right. (Pause) Onemoment. This ghost has no right to behere. He’s trespassing.

ELEANORE: Trespassing or no, I refuseto stand here.

GHOST (Sternly): You stay, while Iupbraid this. . .this intruder. (Boldly)Sir, whoever you may be, I demandthat you explain your presence.(Pause) Well, sir, speak!

ELEANORE (Nervously): Don’t go anycloser, Sir Simon.

GHOST: I shall! Speak or I shall seizeyou, sir. (Pause) Very well! Comehere—(Pause, then in a stunned voice)Why, it’s—

ELEANORE: Not a ghost.

GHOST: Just a white curtain. . .asquash. . .and a sweeping brush.

ELEANORE: That placard on its chest—I mean on the curtain. . .

GHOST: It says: “Ye Ghost. Ye only true

and original spook. Beware of ye imita-tions. All others are counterfeits.”Tricked again by those Americans!Foiled, outwitted! Revenge, oh, revenge!

MUSIC: A light, humorous theme. Forteand then segue to ghostly, measuredtheme. Hold under.

WASHINGTON (Low voice): I wish he’dshow up.

JEFFERSON: Aw, Wash, let’s go back tobed.

WASHINGTON: Wait just another fewminutes.

JEFFERSON: All right. (Pause) You goteverything ready?

WASHINGTON: I think I hear some-thing. Listen. (Slight rattle of doorhandle. Door opens.) Let him have it,Jeff.

JEFFERSON: Here goes! (Sound ofGHOST being thumped with a pillow.GHOST yelps in surprise.) Don’t . . likebeing hit with a pillow, huh! (Morethumping)

WASHINGTON: Stand back, Jeff.(Sound of pail of water being tossed asWASHINGTON speaks) Nothing likea nice cold pail of water to cool off aghost. (GHOST yells.)

MUSIC: Up and out.

ELEANORE: I must say, Sir Simon, thatyou’ve mishandled this whole situa-tion, almost from the start.

GHOST: Don’t be so annoying. (Hesneezes.) That water they tossed on mehas given me a miserable cold. I wishyou would go to Mrs. Otis’ medicinechest and see if she has any cold pills.

OCTOBER 2016 17

ELEANORE: I wouldn’t dream of stir-ring from this cell. (Shuddering)Getting chased by those awfulAmericans! (GHOST sneezes again.) Icertainly am sorry I ever came back.

GHOST (Irritably): Then go back toyour grave.

ELEANORE: That is just what I intendto do. I have had enough of this mortallife to know when it is time to leave.And if you will heed my advice, you willdo the same.

GHOST: I shall remain.

ELEANORE: You will rue it, mark me.

GHOST: Revenge, revenge is what Iseek. I shall drive them from thishouse, once and for all. (He sneezes.)

ELEANORE: Then have it, and be done.I am leaving. And happy I am with mydecision. And where I come from, Ishall be able once again to revert to atype of speech that is normal. Theemay continue alone. Dost thou under-stand me, milord and late husband?

GHOST (Glumly): I dost. (He sneezes.)

MRS. OTIS (After a pause; fading in): Itseems to be coming out all right,doesn’t it, Mrs. Umney?

MRS. UMNEY (As though exerting her-self): Yes, just needs a bit of brisk rub-bing, that’s all, Mrs. Otis. Ah! There weare, clean as a whistle.

MRS. OTIS: Be certain to check the flooragain tomorrow morning.

MRS. UMNEY (Fading out): I will dothat, ma’am, the very first thing, restassured. (Pause)

MRS. OTIS: I quite fail to understand

this. During the past few days the colorof the blood on the floor seems to havechanged. (Pause) Virginia, will you putdown that book and listen to me?

VIRGINIA: Yes, Mother.

MRS. OTIS: Haven’t you noticed? Oneday the stain was a dull red, the next avermillion. Yesterday it was purple,and today it was a bright emeraldgreen. I never did hear of emeraldgreen blood, did you, dear?

VIRGINIA: Oh, Mother, don’t fool aboutit. I don’t think it is at all humorous.

MRS. OTIS: Well, I certainly do. Haveyou seen him lately?

VIRGINIA: The ghost? No, I haven’t.

MRS. OTIS: Not a sound out of him. Youknow, your father’s bottle of RisingSun Lubricator is missing. I have anidea Mr. Ghost has taken it and isusing it to oil his chains. (She laughs.)He might have left a note thanking us.

VIRGINIA: You’re being ridiculous.

MRS. OTIS: No, just to the point. By theway, we’re going riding this afternoon.Do you want to join us?

VIRGINIA: No, I believe I’ll stay hereand read.

MRS. OTIS (Fading): If you change yourmind, let me know. I’ll have the groomsaddle your horse. (Pause. VIRGINIAhums an old English ballad. Sound ofdoor opening. VIRGINIA stops singingand gasps with surprise.)

VIRGINIA: Y-you! You’re the—

GHOST (With deep concern): Yes, I’mthe Canterville Ghost. I hope you don’tmind my sitting here in the library.


VIRGINIA: No. In, fact, my brothers aregoing back to Eton tomorrow, so if youbehave yourself, no one will annoy youfrom now on. And I’m sure you’ll beable to sit in the library as much as youwish.

GHOST: It is absurd asking me tobehave myself. I must rattle mychains, and groan and walk about atnight. It is my only reason for existing.

VIRGINIA: It is no reason at all for exist-ing, and you know you have been verywicked. Murdering your wife!

GHOST (Petulantly): Well, I quite admitit, but it was a family affair, and it con-cerned no one else.

VIRGINIA: It is very wrong to kill any-one.

GHOST: Oh, I hate the cheap severity ofabstract ethics. My wife was veryplain, never had my ruffs properlystarched, and she was a bad cook.

VIRGINIA: That is not a proper way totalk.

GHOST: But, that’s all over. However, Idon’t think it was very nice of herbrothers to starve me to death, eventhough I did kill her.

VIRGINIA: Oh, Mr. Ghost, I mean SirSimon, are you hungry? Let me get youa sandwich.

GHOST: No, thank you, I never eat now;but it is very kind of you. You are muchnicer than the rest of your horrid, rude,vulgar, dishonest family.

VIRGINIA: It is you who are rude andhorrid and vulgar. As for being dishon-est, I know you stole the paints out ofmy box to furbish up that ridiculousbloodstain here in the library. Who

ever heard of emerald green blood?

GHOST (Meekly): What was I to do?Blood is so difficult to get nowadays. Asfor color, that is a matter of taste. TheCantervilles have blue blood, forinstance.

VIRGINIA: The best thing for you to dois to emigrate.

GHOST: Emigrate? Leave England?

VIRGINIA: My father will be only toohappy to give you free passage.

GHOST: But isn’t there a heavy duty onspirits of every kind?

VIRGINIA: True, but my father knowsall the Customs officers. There aremany Americans who would pay anyamount of money to have a real livefamily ghost.

GHOST: I don’t think I should likeAmerica.

VIRGINIA: I suppose because we haveno curiosities.

GHOST: No curiosities! You have yourmanners.

VIRGINIA (Stiffly): Good evening! I willgo ask Papa to get the twins an extraweek’s holiday, and don’t blame me ifthey invent several more nasty tricks.

GHOST: Oh, no! Please, Miss Virginia,don’t go. Stay here with me. I am solonely, so unhappy, and I really don’tknow what to do. I want to go to sleep,and I cannot.

VIRGINIA: That’s quite absurd. Sleepingisn’t difficult.

GHOST: I have not slept for over threehundred years, and I am so tired.

OCTOBER 2016 19

VIRGINIA: Poor, poor ghost, have you noplace where you can sleep?

GHOST: Far away beyond the pinewoods there is a little garden. Therethe grass grows long and deep; thereare the great white stars of the hem-lock flowers; there the nightingalesings all night. And the cold, crystalmoon looks down, and the yew treespreads out its giant arms over thesleepers.

VIRGINIA (Softly): You mean theGarden of Death.

GHOST: Yes, Death. Death must be sobeautiful. To lie in the soft brownearth, and listen to silence. To have noyesterday and no tomorrow. To forgettime, to forgive life, to be at peace. Youcan help me find all that.

VIRGINIA: How?

GHOST: You can open for me the por-tals of Death’s house, for kindness andlove are with you, and they arestronger than Death. (Pause) Have youever read the old prophecy on thelibrary window?

VIRGINIA: Oh, often. I know it quitewell. (She recites.)“When a golden girl can winPrayer from out of the lips of sin,When the barren almond bears,And a little child gives away its tears,Then shall all the house be stillAnd peace come to Canterville.”(Pause) But I don’t know what it means.

GHOST: It means that you must weepwith me for my sins, because I have notears, and pray with me for my soul,because I have no faith. Then perhapsthe Angel of Death will have mercy onme.

VIRGINIA: I will ask the Angel to have

mercy on you.

MUSIC: A thin, unearthly strain.

GHOST: Then take my hand. This wallwill open, and we will disappear. I sig-nal once. (Rap on the wall) Twice.Another rap) The panel slides back,and we disappear.

MUSIC: Up and out into sound of tele-phone ringing, followed by receiverbeing lifted from hook.

MR. OTIS: Hello. . . .Yes, this is Mr. Otis.. . . Oh, yes, Inspector. Any news?(Long pause) I see. Thank you, andkeep in touch with me. Good night.(Sound of receiver being replaced onhook) That was the local police.

MRS. OTIS (Anxious): Any word?

MR. OTIS: No.

MRS. OTIS: There must be somethingyou can do, Hiram.

MR. OTIS: Lucy, I don’t know what todo.

MRS. OTIS: Keep on looking.

MR. OTIS: But where? The servantshave been and still are searching. Thepolice have scoured the country formiles around. We’ve covered the houseand the grounds and the stable. All wecan do now is stay by the telephone andwait.

MRS. OTIS: Where are the twins?

MR. OTIS: With Mrs. Umney, looking.

MRS. OTIS: One thing, at least, is cer-tain. We know approximately whenVirginia disappeared. It was aroundteatime this afternoon. Mrs. Umneyhad asked her if she didn’t want some


tea, and Virginia had said no. WhenMrs. Umney returned, which was inless than a half-hour, the child wasnowhere to be found. (Pause) You havetried the railway station, haven’t you?

MR. OTIS: Yes. The police checked.She’s not been there. Very mysterious,the whole affair.

MRS. OTIS: I think you should have thepond dragged.

MR. OTIS: Stop talking such nonsense.

MRS. OTIS: I should have insisted thatshe go riding with us. (Sound of twins’voices can be heard ad libbing in thedistance. They gradually fade in.)

MR. OTIS: Here come the boys.

MRS. OTIS: Perhaps they have news.(Calls out) Boys, come here.

WASHINGTON: Not a sign. Searchedeverywhere.

JEFFERSON: Even as far as the road tothe village.

MR. OTIS: It’s late. The pair of you’dbetter get off to bed.

WASHINGTON: Oh, Papa, we wouldn’tsleep.

JEFFERSON: Besides, we aren’t tired,and we want to wait up with you.

MRS. OTIS: May as well allow them toremain up, Hiram.

MR. OTIS: Very well.

MUSIC: A thin, unearthly strain (thesame theme that introduced the disap-pearance of Virginia through the pan-eling) sneaks in and holds under.

MRS. OTIS: Listen. Do you hear music?

MR. OTIS: Yes.

WASHINGTON: I hear it, too, Mother.

JEFFERSON: So do I. (Sound of threemeasured, evenly-spaced raps on thepaneling.)

WASHINGTON: What do you—

MR. OTIS (Tensely): Quiet! (Sound ofpaneling crashing back. Music out)

MRS. OTIS: Virginia!

WASHINGTON: You all right, Virginia?

JEFFERSON: We’re glad you’re back.(Sound of paneling flying shut)

MR. OTIS (Almost angrily): Where haveyou been?

MRS. OTIS: Don’t scold her, Hiram!

VIRGINIA: Papa, I have been with theGhost. He’s dead, and you must comeand see him, all of you.

MR. OTIS (Sharply): Nonsense!

VIRGINIA: He had been very wicked,but he was really sorry for all he haddone.

MRS. OTIS (Anxiously): Dear, are youcertain you’re all right and not justimagining things?

VIRGINIA: Follow me and you will seethat what I say is true. Take a light,someone, for it’s dark where we aregoing. . .dark and lonely.

MUSIC: The sliding panel themesneaks in again and holds under.Sound of one knock on panel, then asecond and a third, after which panel

OCTOBER 2016 21

SOUND EFFECTSMusic (eerie, mysterious, light, humorous, etc., as indicated intext); rolling thunder; body hitting floor; clanking of chains; dooropening; grunting and groaning; bottle thrown; rattle of doorhandle; clock striking. Other sound effects may be added asdesired.

bangs open. Music up full, then out.

WASHINGTON: Golly! It’s certainlydamp down here.

MR. OTIS: Jeff, hold your light up high-er.

MRS. OTIS: What is this place, anyhow?

VIRGINIA: A secret corridor. (Pause)Here we are. (Straining) Someone helpme swing this door open.

MR. OTIS: Here, I’ll do it. (Grunting)Here we. . .go. (Pause) Ah, there!(Sound of heavy door squeaking open)

JEFFERSON (Awed): It’s a cell.

MR. OTIS: Musty smelling.

WASHINGTON: Look—over in the cor-ner. (MRS. OTIS screams.)

MR. OTIS: It’s only a skeleton.

VIRGINIA: It’s our ghost, Sir Simon.

MR. OTIS (Sharply): What are you say-ing?

VIRGINIA: That skeleton is our ghost.

JEFFERSON: Look, he’s chained to thefloor.

MR. OTIS: Suppose you explain all this.

VIRGINIA: As we all know, the ghost SirSimon murdered his wife, the LadyEleanore. Her brothers, upon learning

of it, overpowered him They took himhere and chained him to the floor.

MRS. OTIS: That trencher and ewerlying just out of his reach, what didthey signify?

VIRGINIA: They held water and food,carefully placed just out of reach.

JEFFERSON: And that means he died ofhunger and thirst.

VIRGINIA: Yes.

WASHINGTON: What a way to die.

VIRGINIA: He was wicked then, but heisn’t anymore.

MR. OTIS: You mean, something hap-pened to him this afternoon?

VIRGINIA: Yes, Papa, he repented. Andhe asked me to see that his remains areburied in the family graveyard. Neveragain will he haunt this place.

JEFFERSON (Suddenly): Look, just out-side of this grated window. That oldwithered almond tree has blossomed.

WASHINGTON: I can see the flowers!

VIRGINIA: He has been forgiven. PoorSir Simon! I owe him a great deal. Hemade me see what life is and whatdeath signifies, and why love isstronger than both.

MUSIC: Up and out.THE END


OCTOBER 2016 23

Middle & Lower Grades

SCENE 1TIME: September, 1620.

SETTING: The Mayflower, docked inPlymouth, England. A railing (may beshown with a rope running across aline of chairs) runs all the way fromstage left to right. The words THEMAYFLOWER appear on a sign hangingfrom railing, center. Backdrop shows asunny sky. Another rope running left toright lies on the stage toward the rear.

AT RISE: The Pilgrims are boarding theMayflower. NARRATOR is down left.CAPTAIN JONES is center, talkingquietly with MR. COPPIN and GOV-ERNOR CARVER. Behind them,OTHER PILGRIMS are carrying boxesor baskets and cross from left to right.

NARRATOR: In the 1600’s, the Pilgrimswere a group of English people whowanted to worship differently than thelaws of England allowed. So theymoved to Holland, but found it was verydifficult to earn a living there. At last,they decided to make themselves a newhome in America. Governor Carver,William Bradford, and other Pilgrimleaders made the arrangements. There

Once Upon a MayflowerThe exciting story of the Pilgrims’ voyage to the New

World, as recorded by William Bradford in 1620. . .

by Pamela Love

GOVERNOR CARVER, PilgrimleaderMRS. CARVER, his wifeJOHNDOROTHYMR. BRADFORDMRS. BRADFORDMR. HOPKINSMRS. HOPKINSCONSTANCE HOPKINS, 14GILES HOPKINS, 12DAMARIS HOPKINS, 2CAPTAIN JONES, captain of theMayflowerMR. COPPINMR. WILLIAMSONDR. HEALENARRATOROTHER PILGRIMSOTHER SAILORS

Characters

Once Upon a Mayflower is protected byU.S. copyright law. It is unlawful to usethis play in any way unless you are acurrent subscriber to PLAYS Magazine(www.playsmagazine.com).

both 18, servantsto the Carvers


were many problems to solve, but onSeptember 6, 1620, the Pilgrims werefinally ready to go to America on a shipcalled the Mayflower. (MRS. CARVERenters left, carrying a basket and look-ing around. She sees GOVERNORCARVER and hurries over to him.)

MRS. CARVER: Oh, there you are, dear.William Bradford just told me thatalmost everyone’s on board. The ser-vants will be here in a moment with therest of our things.

GOVERNOR CARVER: Very good. Kath-erine, this is our ship’s captain,Christopher Jones. Captain Jones, thisis my wife, Katherine Carver. (CAP-TAIN JONES bows to MRS. CARVER.)

MRS. CARVER: Can you get us theresafely, Captain? I know it’s a dangeroustrip.

CAPTAIN JONES: We’ll do our best,ma’am.

GOVERNOR: Captain Jones told me thatsome of his crew have sailed to Americabefore.

MR. COPPIN: I’ve done that, sir. It’squite a trip, but we know the way.

MRS. CARVER: We have faith in you andyour crew, Captain Jones.

CAPTAIN (To CARVERS): If you’llexcuse us, Mr. Coppin and I have somelast-minute things to do. (CAPTAINand MR. COPPIN exit right.)

MRS. CARVER: Do you think this ship isbig enough to carry all of us? Williamsaid there are almost 150 peopleaboard, counting the crew.

GOVERNOR: We’ll all squeeze in some-how.

MRS. CARVER: And there’s the live-stock, too.

GOVERNOR: Yes, but nothing big likehorses or cows.

MRS. CARVER: True. (Sighs) I wish wecould have brought a cow, at least. Tothink we had to sell a barrel of butter tohelp pay for our passage.

GOVERNOR: Sacrifices must be made.

MRS. CARVER: I’ll remind you of thatlater when you’re wishing you couldbutter your bread! (GOVERNOR andMRS. CARVER exit right. JOHN, car-rying a large box and pretending tostagger under its weight, andDOROTHY, carrying a smaller one,enter left.)

JOHN: Dorothy, did you know theCarvers are taking a cow to America?

DOROTHY: A cow? Are you certain,John? Governor Carver told me wecouldn’t bring cows on this voyage.

JOHN: He must have changed his mind.

DOROTHY (Looking around): Really? Idon’t see a cow.

JOHN (Groaning): I think there’s one inthis box! (DOROTHY laughs and bothexit right. MR. HOPKINS and GILESHOPKINS enter right, carrying boxes.)

MR. HOPKINS: Your mother’s downbelow getting settled, Giles. While I’mhelping her, you go find your sisters.They came aboard with us, but thenDamaris ran off and Constance wentafter her. I haven’t seen them since. Iwonder where they could be.

GILES (Shouting): Constance? Damaris?Where are you?

OCTOBER 2016 25

MR. HOPKINS: I could have done that.(Exits right. CONSTANCE enters left,carrying a basket and leadingDAMARIS by the hand.)

CONSTANCE: Here we are, Giles. Lookwho I found with the animals.

DAMARIS (In a childish voice): I saw apuppy dog! And chickens! And sheep!(Barking is heard off left, also baa-ingand clucking.)

GILES: And I think I saw a cat downbelow. You’ll have plenty of time tomake friends with it once we set sail.

CONSTANCE: And that’s not the onlynew friend she’ll be making on this trip,is it? (She and GILES laugh.)

DAMARIS: Who?

GILES: You’ll find out in a few weeks.

CONSTANCE: Now let’s go find Mamaand Papa. (HOPKINS children exitright. MR. and MRS. BRADFORDenter left, carrying boxes.)

MRS. BRADFORD: Did you remember topack paper, William? I know you wantto write about our journey to the NewWorld.

MR. BRADFORD (Patting box): Ofcourse I did. There’s some in this box.

MRS. BRADFORD: Some paper is good.More is better. I brought extra pens,paper, and ink.

MR. BRADFORD: Good idea. I have afeeling there will be a lot to write about.(CAPTAIN and GOVERNOR enterright.)

GOVERNOR: Are all of the passengersand livestock on board, Mr. Bradford?

MR. BRADFORD: Yes, they are.

CAPTAIN: Good! (Turns right; shouts)Prepare to set sail, crew! We’re off to theNew World! (All cheer. Curtain)

* * *SCENE 2

TIME:Weeks later.

SETTING: At sea during a storm. Back-ground shows storm clouds with light-ning. Sounds of wind, rain, and thunder.

NARRATOR: Unfortunately, the May-flower ran into stormy weather duringits voyage.

AT RISE: MR. COPPIN and MR.WILLIAMSON are center, leaning leftand right together as if the ship isrolling, which they continue to dothroughout the scene.

MR. COPPIN: What a storm!

MR. WILLIAMSON: Aye, but I’ve beenthrough worse. (JOHN and DORO-THY enter right. DOROTHY is tryingto pull him back. JOHN is holding hishat on. MR. COPPIN and MR. WIL-LIAMSON watch and listen to them.)

DOROTHY: Are you crazy, John? Look atthose sailors! (Points) They can barelystay on their feet. Come back downbelow, where it’s safe.

JOHN: Safe? Dorothy, nowhere is safeon the Mayflower. Or have you forgot-ten how the ship almost broke apart?

DOROTHY: Well, it’s safer below, any-way. And they fixed that broken beam.

JOHN: I don’t care. I’m seasick! I have toget some fresh air!

MR. COPPIN (To MR. WILLIAMSON):Those passengers are always complain-ing about something.


MR. WILLIAMSON (To MR. COPPIN):Aye, if it’s not being seasick, it’s thefood. Honestly, you’d think they’d neverseen bugs on their bread before! Justbrush them off and dig in, I say.

MR. COPPIN: You brush them off first?

DOROTHY (To JOHN): Be careful, then.I’m going below. (Exits right. JOHNcrosses left, taking deep breaths andleaning left to right as if ship is rolling.)

JOHN: You know, considering how itleaks down below, it’s not much wetterup on deck. Maybe I’ll stay here. I canask the crew if they could use my hel-el-el-elp! (“Help” turns into a shout forhelp as he stumbles sideways, exitingleft. A loud splash is heard.)

MR. COPPIN (Shouting): Man over-board! (Crosses left, holds hand overeyes)

MR. WILLIAMSON: See if you can spothim! I’ll get help! (Runs out right)

MR. COPPIN (Shouting): I see you!(Picks up rope lying on stage and pullsit tight) Hold on! (MR. WILLIAMSON,CAPTAIN, and OTHER SAILORSrun in right.) I see him! He’s holdingonto this rope.

CAPTAIN (Taking rope behind MR.COPPIN): Quick! Everyone hang on.(OTHER SAILORS pick up rope.) Nowpull! Pull! (All back slowly up.)

MR. COPPIN: He’s at the railing!

CAPTAIN: Hang on! I’ll get him! (Exitsleft, and backs onto stage holdingJOHN by both hands. JOHN is wetand missing his hat.) Good work, all!(OTHER SAILORS and MR. COPPINcheer.)

JOHN (Coughing): Thank you. I’m so

grateful to you all.

CAPTAIN: Fetch Dr. Heale, Mr. William-son. (MR. WILLIAMSON runs outright, and returns with DR. HEALE.)Here’s a patient for you, Doctor.

DR. HEALE: Someone who’s coughingthat loudly will probably be all rightfrom the dunking he got. However, Idon’t believe there’s a cure for beingfoolish enough to go on deck in thisweather. (CONSTANCE runs inright.) It must be contagious. Here’sanother one!

CONSTANCE: Please Doctor, it’s mymother. Father said to bring you rightaway. (DR. HEALE and CON-STANCE rush out right.)

CAPTAIN: It’s always something on thisship. Now what? (Moments later, ababy starts crying loudly.) Well!Sounds like there’s a new passenger onboard! (All cheer.)

JOHN: I’ll remind Mr. Bradford to addthe baby’s name to his list of Pilgrims.(Curtain)

***SCENE 3

TIME: November, 1620.

SETTING: Backdrop shows a sunny sky.

AT RISE: Entire cast is on stage, facingforward. PILGRIMS are on the right,CREW is on the left. MRS. HOPKINSis carrying “baby.” MR. BRADFORDhas a piece of paper and quill pen.JOHN stands with CARVERS andDOROTHY.

NARRATOR: At last, sixty-six days later,the Mayflower reached its destination.

CONSTANCE (Pointing): Look at allthose bright red and yellow leaves onthe trees. They’re not as pretty back in

England or Holland, are they? (Kneelsnext to “baby”) Look, it’s America, yournew home, baby brother.

MRS. HOPKINS: He has a name, youknow.

MR. BRADFORD: Yes, and I’ve beenmeaning to ask, did I spell it correctlyon my passenger list? O-C-E-A-N-U-S?

MRS. HOPKINS: That’s right, he’s ourlittle Oceanus Hopkins!

MR. HOPKINS: To remind him that hewas born on the Atlantic Ocean.

GILES (To CONSTANCE): I wonder ifthey would have named a girl that?

CONSTANCE: Mayflower would soundprettier.

DAMARIS (Pointing out toward audi-ence): I wanna play there!

CAPTAIN: Crew, prepare the rowboat.We’re going to find the best place totake our passengers ashore.

MR. BRADFORD: Wait a moment,Captain. As you know, I’m keeping ajournal of our voyage to America. We’vebeen through a lot together. I want toknow if there’s anything you want me towrite down, now that we’ve finally

reached the New World.

CAPTAIN: Well, I’m thankful thatbecause of the tools my passengersbrought, we were able to fix my shipwhen the main beam broke during thatstorm.

GOVERNOR: I’m thankful that becauseof the crew’s skill and Heaven’s guid-ance, we’re here safely.

MRS. CARVER: I’m thankful that youwere able to pull young John here backon board.

JOHN: Not half as thankful as I am,Mrs. Carver. (All laugh.)

DOROTHY: I’m thankful that we’ll soonbe able to cook without all those bugsaboard ship!

JOHN: Not half as thankful as I am forthat either! (All laugh.)

MRS. HOPKINS: And of course we’rethankful for our new son, aren’t we,dear? (Smiles at MR. HOPKINS, whonods)

GILES (In a stage whisper to CON-STANCE): And I’m thankful they did-n’t name me Oceanus! (Curtain)

THE END(Production Notes on next page)

OCTOBER 2016 27

CHARACTERS: 16+ male and female.PLAYING TIME: Approximately 10 min-utesCOSTUMES: White shirts, dark pants orskirts for Pilgrims, with “Pilgrim hats”for the males and white scarves or“Pilgrim caps” for females. Sailors wearappropriate, more brightly coloredsailor gear. Dr. Heale wears darkclothes but no Pilgrim hat. Narratormay wear Pilgrim costume or modernclothing. After John is pulled from thewater, he is wet and missing his hat.PROPERTIES: Boxes and baskets, a babydoll wrapped in a blanket, a piece of

white paper, a quill pen.SETTING: The Mayflower. The ship maybe represented by a row of chairs with arope running across them, with a signreading THE MAYFLOWER hanging fromthe rope. Another long rope is lying onthe floor toward rear of stage. Backdropshows sunny weather in Scenes 1 and 3,stormy weather in Scene 2.LIGHTING: Lights may be flickered torepresent lightning, if desired.SOUND: Animal sounds (sheep, chick-ens, and dogs), sounds of wind, rain,and thunder, loud splash, baby crying.


PRODUCTION NOTESOnce Upon a Mayflower(Play on pages 23-27)

For more information on the Mayflower and its passengers, you maywant to consult one or more of the resources listed below.

BOOKSBradford, William. Of PlymouthPlantation 1620-1647. (Edited bySamuel Eliot Morison) New York:Knopf, 1952, 1991.

Cook, Peter. You Wouldn’t Want to Sailon the Mayflower! A Trip That TookEntirely Too Long. New York: FranklinWatts, 2005, 2013.

McGovern, Ann. If You Sailed on theMayflower. New York: Scholastic, Inc.,1969, 1991.

Philbrick, Nathaniel. Mayflower: AStory of Courage, Community, and War.New York: Viking Penguin, 2006.

Philbrick, Nathaniel. The Mayflowerand the Pilgrims’ New World. NewYork: Puffin Books, 2008.

Plimoth Plantation with PeterArenstam, John Kemp, and CatherineO’Neill Grace. Mayflower 1620: A New

Look at a Pilgrim Voyage. WashingtonD.C.: National Geographic, 2003.

Whitehurst, Susan. The Library of thePilgrims: The Pilgrims Before theMayflower. New York: PowerKidsPress, 2002.

Whitehurst, Susan. The Library of thePilgrims: The Mayflower. New York:PowerKids Press, 2002.

DVDDesperate Crossing: The Untold Story ofthe Mayflower. Produced by Lone WolfDocumentary Group for the HistoryChannel. Written by Rocky Collins,2006.

WEBSITES

www.pilgrimhallmuseum.orgwww.plimoth.org/learn/just-kids/home-work-help/mayflower-and-mayflower-compact

OCTOBER 2016 29


TIME: Late afternoon of a school day.

SETTING: A wooded park. A thick ringof green moss encircles a tree and atree stump. Some bushes are acrossthe upstage right corner.

AT RISE: PIXIE, hiding behind tree,peers out for a moment, disappears,then peers out from other side. She tip-toes out cautiously, dances acrossstage to make sure she is alone, thendances down center and looks at audi-ence. She smiles, nods approvingly,and opens pouch hanging from herwaist. She runs to moss ring and pre-tends to scatter imaginary dust over it.

PIXIE (Chanting):A little pinch of Make-Believe,And a puff of Pixie-Glow, (Skips center,pretends to scatter dust over audience)A wave of Once-Upon-A-Time,And hush! For here we go! (She wavesimpishly and skips behind bushes.NOAH, carrying a ball, enters right.)

NOAH (Calling off): Come on, guys,hurry up. We’ll catch up with the others

The Magic Wishing RingNouns, verbs, adjectives, and other parts of speech are

explored in this fun tale of pixie dust and imagination.

by Gwen Chaloner

PIXIE

NOAH

ANTHONY

TYLER

JOSH

CASEY

ALEXIS

MADELYN

CAPTAIN GRAMMAR

NOUN

VERB

PRONOUN

ADJECTIVE

ADVERB

PREPOSITION

CONJUNCTION

INTERJECTION

Characters

The Magic Wishing Ring is protected byU.S. copyright law. It is unlawful to usethis play in any way unless you are acurrent subscriber to PLAYS Magazine(www.playsmagazine.com).


at the park. (ANTHONY enters.)

ANTHONY: Coming.

NOAH (Calling off): Josh! Tyler, comeon, you’re late!

JOSH (Entering right, followed byTYLER): Don’t wait for me. I can’t go tothe park today.

NOAH: Aw, why not?

JOSH: I’ve got way too much homework,and my parents said unless I finish it allI can’t go to the game tonight.

TYLER: Same with me.

NOAH: But that’s hours away.

ANTHONY: And we’re going to the gametoo.

JOSH: I know, but that’s the deal I madewith my mom and dad.

TYLER: And my mom is on my case eversince I messed up my last history exam.

NOAH: Well, O.K. See you later, then.

JOSH (As NOAH and ANTHONY exitleft): O.K. Have a good game.

NOAH (From offstage): We will! (AsJOSH and TYLERwalk upstage, PIXIEpokes head out from behind bushes, butthey do not see her. PIXIE tiptoes out afew steps, pretends to scatter more dustfrom pouch, then hides again.)

JOSH (Turning): Here’s a good place. Sowhat are you studying, history?

TYLER: Yup.

JOSH: I wish I had history homework. Ihave to study grammar—the parts ofspeech—and I don’t understand any of

it. (CASEY, ALEXIS and MADELYNenter right, carrying schoolbooks.)

CASEY: Alexis, there’s your brother.

ALEXIS: Josh, what are you doing here?Mom said we had to get our homeworkdone early if we want to go to the game.

JOSH: I know, I know—Tyler and I aredoing our homework here.

ALEXIS: Oh. I guess that’s O.K.

MADELYN (Suddenly): Hey, look! It’s awishing ring! A pixie’s wishing ring!

OTHERS (Puzzled; ad lib): What kind ofa ring? Where? Show us. (Etc.)

MADELYN (Pointing): See? It’s allaround this tree. Josh and Tyler areboth inside a pixie’s wishing ring.

JOSH: Oh, come on, are you serious? It’sjust a ring of moss.

CASEY: What does it mean, Madelyn?

MADELYN: Don’t you know the rhyme?“Wish inside a mossy ring,Pixie folk will visit you,And before the sun goes down,Your third wish will come true.”

ALEXIS and CASEY (Brightly): Oh!

JOSH: That’s crazy.

TYLER: Yeah, and anyway, Josh justmade a wish, and it didn’t come true.

JOSH (Surprised): I did?

TYLER: Sure. You wished you had histo-ry homework instead of grammar.

JOSH: Oh yeah, that’s right.

MADELYN: But it’s the third wish that

OCTOBER 2016 31

comes true. One, two, three.

JOSH (Mocking her): One, two, three.Phooey, phooey, phooey. I wish you’dleave us alone.

MADELYN: That’s your second wish.You’d better watch out!

TYLER: Leave us alone! We have to study.

ALEXIS: We’re going. Goodbye. (ALEX-IS, CASEY, and MADELYN exit left.)

JOSH (Shaking head): A wishing ring!

TYLER: It’s ridiculous.

JOSH (Looking closely at moss ring): Itis weird, though, how it’s in sort of aperfect ring, isn’t it?

TYLER: Yeah, it is kind of cool. . . .Well,I’d better get started. Here’s to history!(Sits on ground at left side of tree, fac-ing left, opens book and begins read-ing.He remains in this position duringthe following interactions betweenJOSH, PIXIE, and CAPTAIN GRAM-MAR.)

JOSH: And here’s to—ugh!—grammar.(Sits on tree stump, facing front, andopens grammar book) Oh, boy. . . .(Yawns) Oh, I wish . . .(Yawns again.PIXIE pokes head from behind busheswhen JOSH says “wish”) Page twenty-four. (Leafs through book) Chapterthree. (Yawns) I wish . . .I wish. . .(PIXIE appears again. JOSH chants.)The parts of speech. The parts ofspeech. (Seriously) I wish I could figureout a good way to learn them.

PIXIE (Running out eagerly): Here I am.Here I am. Are you ready?

JOSH (Startled; standing): Who—whoare you?

PIXIE: The wishing-ring pixie. Youcalled me out with your third wish. Areyou having trouble with your grammar?

JOSH (Confused): Uh, yeah—you couldsay so. (Shakes head) Who did you sayyou were?

PIXIE (Brightly): I’m the wishing-ringpixie! Don’t worry, I’ll get you fixed upwith your grammar problems. (Sheruns right and blows on whistle. CAP-TAIN GRAMMAR enters right.) Ah, Iknew you would come when I calledyou, dear, kind Captain Grammar.

CAPTAIN GRAMMAR: I hope you’re notup to one of your tricks, Pixie.

PIXIE: Oh, no, indeed! This is a veryserious matter.

GRAMMAR: Well, what is it this time?

PIXIE: A wish. A third wish made insidemy wishing ring. (She points to JOSH.)

GRAMMAR: I see. And how can I help?

PIXIE: He wished he understood hisgrammar lessons better. He’s learningthe parts of speech, and he doesn’tunderstand them at all. (GRAMMARlooks at JOSH and shakes head slow-ly. PIXIE runs around GRAMMAR,pleading.) You’ll help him, won’t you?

GRAMMAR (Smiling): Yes. I’ll help.(PIXIE claps hands and blows whistleagain. Parts of Speech enter. PIXIEdirects them right. GRAMMAR goes toJOSH.) Josh, do you know the meaningof grammar?

JOSH: It’s—well, it’s sort of speakingright.

GRAMMAR: You have the idea—speak-ing and writing correctly. Using yourlanguage properly.


PARTS OF SPEECH (Nodding heads; adlib): Of course. You’ve got it. (Etc.)

PIXIE: Of course, of course, of course!

GRAMMAR (Holding up hand forsilence): There are many thousands ofwords in the English language. Butthere are only eight different kinds ofwords: the eight parts of speech. Whenyou understand that, you have taken abig step toward understanding yourlanguage. (JOSH nods.) My eight chil-dren will tell you about themselves.Here is Noun.

NOUN (Stepping forward): I’m Noun. Anoun is the name of something. Thingsyou smell or touch or taste, things youhear or see: sky and pumpkin, booksand paint, a drum, a car, a tree. Andnames of people, like Theo or Jasmine;names of countries, like France orSpain; and names of rivers, streets andtowns are all known as proper nouns.Nouns are parts of speech that name.(VERB comes forward.)Ah! Here’s my twin, we share our fame.I, the noun, will name a thing—

VERB: And I bring action to that thing!For I am Verb. I sing and talk, sit andstand, and run and walk. Any actionyou can name, any state or any feeling,I’m the master of them all.

NOUN and VERB:Hand in hand as twins we go,The parts of speech you first must know.

JOSH: Nouns and verbs. O.K. Got it.

PRONOUN (Peeping out from behindNOUN): And Pronouns, too!

JOSH: Pronoun? Who are you?

NOUN:Oh, he’s my shadow, always near me,Takes my place quite well and clearly.

PRONOUN:It and you and he and she,They and them and you and me,All are words that take the placeOf a noun with ease and grace.

JOSH (Remembering): Pronouns takethe place of nouns—it for book, and theyfor clowns.

GRAMMAR: Well done, Josh. And hereare two more of my children. (ADJEC-TIVE and ADVERB come forward.)Adjective and Adverb.

JOSH: They look like twins, too.

NOUN: They are! Adjective is myfavorite twin. (Puts arm aroundADJECTIVE)

VERB: Adverb is my favorite twin. (Putsarm around ADVERB)

NOUN:They’re full of mischief, that I know.They tell tales where e’er they go.

ADJECTIVE:I tell secrets about the noun; I tell if it’sfat or small or bright, or long or tall orpink or brown. Like, “the brown dog” or“a dark night.”

JOSH: An adjective describes a noun.

ADVERB: And I tell all about a verb. Ianswer how? and when? and where?She sang sweetly, he jumped down.They ran quickly, here or there.

JOSH: Adverbs tell about the verb.

GRAMMAR: You’ve met Noun, Verb,Pronoun, Adjective and Adverb. Andhere is Preposition. (PREPOSITIONcomes forward.)

PREPOSITION:Just a little word am I.

I go before, I lead the way—Like up the stairs, and through the door,And down the street, or on the tray.But though I always lead a phrase,And relationship I show,I can never stand alone—I need help wherever I go.

JOSH: A preposition leads a phrase, butis too weak to stand alone. To and fromand in and through—they’re all preposi-tions.

CONJUNCTION (Running forward):I’m Conjunction, for I joinThis with that, and that with this.Just a few words—and, but, or—Are often used and hard to miss.I join noun to noun, like ball and book,Or verb to verb, like sing or look.

JOSH: Conjunctions—and, or, but. Got it.

GRAMMAR: One more child, our jump-ing-jack, Interjection.

INTERJECTION:Here I come, I make things hum!I ooh! and ah! and oh!I cry Oh, my goodness! or Oh, dear me!Indeed! Tut-tut! Oh, no!

JOSH: So that’s Interjection! I’ll remem-ber him, for sure.

GRAMMAR: Now you have met my eightchildren, Josh, the eight parts of speech.(Each bows as name is mentioned.)Noun, Verb, Pronoun, Adjective,Adverb, Preposition, Con-junction, andInterjection. Do you think you’ll remem-ber them?

JOSH: Yes, I think I will. I know I will!

GRAMMAR: Then your wish has beengranted. (PIXIE and Parts of Speechcheer.) If you understand the parts ofspeech, you’ve made a good beginning inyour study of grammar. Be sure to learn

each lesson carefully.

JOSH (Seriously): I will.

GRAMMAR: Now let me hear you namethe parts of speech.

JOSH (Pointing to each in turn): Noun,Verb, Pronoun, Adjective, Adverb,Preposition, Conjunction, Interjection.

INTERJECTION (At mention of his/hername, jumping and shouting): Ouch!

GRAMMAR: Well done, Josh.

ALEXIS (Calling offstage): Josh! Josh!(PIXIE runs quickly to Parts of Speechand hurries them off right.)

GRAMMAR: Goodbye, Josh. (Exitsright. PIXIE points at JOSH, whosteps back and sits on tree stump asbefore, closing his eyes.)

ALEXIS (Still offstage): Josh! Where areyou? (PIXIE disappears behind tree.ALEXIS enters left.) Oh, there you are!Josh, Tyler, wake up!

TYLER (Standing): I’m not asleep. I’vebeen studying history.

JOSH: And I’ve been studying grammar.(Stands)

ALEXIS: Well, you looked sound asleepto me.

JOSH: I couldn’t have been asleep. I sawthem all really clearly.

ALEXIS: Who are you talking about?

JOSH: Noun and Verb and Adjectiveand Adverb and—

ALEXIS (Laughing): You’ve been dream-ing. I knew you were.

OCTOBER 2016 33

JOSH: No, no. Just test me, and see.(Holds out book. TYLER shrugs, takesbook, and he and ALEXIS look at ittogether.)

ALEXIS: Name the eight parts of speech.

JOSH: Noun, verb, pronoun, adjective,adverb, preposition, conjunction andinterjection.

TYLER (Surprised): That’s right. But doyou know what they mean? What’s anoun?

JOSH: A noun is the name of a person,place or thing, like America, or book, orTyler.

TYLER: What’s a verb?

JOSH: A verb tells of action, like jump orstand or read; or it tells of states ofbeing, such as is, was, were.

ALEXIS: And a pronoun?

JOSH: A pronoun takes the place of anoun: he, it, who, they.

TYLER: How about adjectives andadverbs?

JOSH: Adjectives describe nouns, likeathletic Tyler, strong America, or yellowbook. Adverbs tell about the verb—where, how, when, why: ran quickly,went somewhere, played happily.

TYLER: So far, so good. What aboutprepositions? And conjunctions?

JOSH: A preposition goes before a noun.It leads a phrase, like on the chair, tothe door, before the play. A conjunctionis a joining word.

ALEXIS: And how about interjection?

JOSH: An interjection expresses feeling,

such as Oh, and Ah, and—(PinchesALEXIS on the arm)

ALEXIS (Shouting): Ouch!

JOSH: That’s right. And “Ouch!”

ALEXIS: That’s not fair. I’ll tell Mom.Oh, and by the way, Mom wants us tocome home. Dinner’s ready.

TYLER: I’d better get home, too. I don’twant to miss any of the game.

JOSH: Aren’t you glad you finished yourhomework, too?

TYLER: For sure! We were lucky tochoose such a quiet place.

JOSH: Quiet?

TYLER: Yes. I didn’t hear a sound thewhole time. (JOSH scratches head,looks puzzled.)

ALEXIS: Come on, you guys. Hurry up.(Exits left, followed by TYLER)

JOSH (Looking carefully all around,then looking at moss ring): It’s stillhere. All green and soft and round. (Hesteps into ring, facing audience.) I wish. . .(PIXIE pokes head out from behindtree, expectantly.) I wish I—

ALEXIS (Calling offstage): Josh, comeon! (JOSH shakes head as if wakingup, steps out of ring. PIXIE disappearsbehind tree, as JOSH exits left. ThenPIXIE comes out, waves after JOSH,and dances into the ring.)

PIXIE: My wishing ring, my wishingring! (She pretends to scatter dust inthe ring, then opens her arms towardaudience.) Who’ll come next to my wish-ing ring? (Curtain)

THE END(Production Notes on page 48)


OCTOBER 2016 35


Creaking, rattling chains, and otherghostly sounds are heard, then FELIXruns in, across stage, fans MR.LYMAN with his sleeve, and slipsbehind MRS. LYMAN’s chair.

FELIX (Whispering in MRS. LYMAN’sear): Boo!

MRS. LYMAN (Sitting up with a start):I do believe I had a little cat nap. Didyou feel a draft just now, dear?

MR. LYMAN (Sitting up): Yes. I feel oneevery night just about this time.

MRS. LYMAN: Well, we won’t feel anydrafts in our new apartment.

MR. LYMAN: True. (Looks around) Iknow this old house is too big for usnow, but I’m going to miss it.

MRS. LYMAN (Patting his hand): Now,Sam, we’ll still have all our thingsaround us. The living room will lookexactly the same. And there’ll be no biglawn to mow or snow to shovel.

Wanted: A House to HauntGhost is faced with finding a new home when his host

family moves from big old house to new apartment. . .

by Hazel W. Corson

MR. SAM LYMAN

MRS. KATHRYN LYMAN

FELIX, a shy ghost

SAMANTHA, a cat

OWL, offstage voice

TWO GHOSTS

MR. MCMANUS

WITCH

PIRATE

TWO VAMPIRES

SKELETON

FAIRY

OTHER CHILDREN

SCENE 1TIME: Evening.

SETTING: Lymans’ living room.

AT RISE:MR. and MRS. LYMAN are ineasy chairs, dozing over newspapers.

Characters

Wanted: A House to Haunt is protectedby U.S. copyright law. It is unlawfulto use this play in any way unlessyou are a current subscriber toPLAYS Magazine(www.playsmagazine.com).


MR. LYMAN: No repairing to do. (Looksat watch) My word! Ten o’clock!Tomorrow’s a busy day. (Rises) Comealong, dear. (MRS. LYMAN turns offtable light follows MR. LYMAN off.After a moment, FELIX comes out andstarts looking under chairs and intocorners.)

FELIX: Here, kitty, kitty, kitty. Whereare you, Samantha? (SAMANTHAenters, yawning and stretching.)

SAMANTHA: You’re such a dependableghost, Felix. Every night at exactly thesame time, you wake Mr. and Mrs.Lyman from their nap so they can go tobed and get a good night’s sleep.

FELIX: I try my best to keep everythingshipshape around here. (Goes to win-dow) That sleepy owl is still dozing.

SAMANTHA: I’ll wake him up. (Goes towindow) Me-owl! Me-owl!

OWL (From offstage): Whoo! Whoo!

SAMANTHA (Calling): You know who,Owl. Time to wake up! Get going, oryou’ll miss breakfast.

OWL (From offstage): Hoot! Hoot!

FELIX: Samantha, what are we going todo when the Lymans move?

SAMANTHA (Prowling around, sniff-ing here and there): I’m staying put.After all, you and Owl will be here.

FELIX: I’m not staying. The new familyhas four children, you know.

SAMANTHA: Four children! Jumpingcats and dogs! I’m too old to put up withfour children.

FELIX: Children scare me half to death.They’ll probably play in the attic on

rainy days. There’ll never be any peaceand quiet around here.

SAMANTHA: I like peace and quiet.Guess I’ll give the new apartment a try,after all. Why don’t you come along?FELIX: Who ever heard of a ghost in anapartment? No, I’ll find another oldhouse to haunt. Meantime, I’ll stay inthe belfry of the church.

SAMANTHA: You and Owl and I willhave to get together sometime.

FELIX: I hope so! I’m going to be so lone-ly! (Curtain)

* * *SCENE 2

BEFORE RISE: FELIX enters.

FELIX: This is a fine fix I’m in. Here it is,Halloween, and I’ve no place to haunt.I’ll try this house. (Crosses right, pre-tends to knock on door)

TWO GHOSTS (Entering): Boo!

FELIX (Jumping back): Oh, this house isalready haunted. (Shyly) I don’t sup-pose you have a vacancy?

2ND GHOST: No, sorry. Where have youbeen haunting?

FELIX: At the Lymans’ house, but now afamily with four children has moved in.

1ST GHOST: Four children! That’s a lotof competition for any ghost.

2ND GHOST: Nobody but a poltergeistcould stand it.

1ST GHOST: Well, you can stay with usuntil you find something.

FELIX: Thanks anyway. I’ll just keeplooking.

2ND GHOST: Why don’t you try the

OCTOBER 2016 37

McManus house on Church Street?

FELIX: Thank you. I will. (GHOSTSexit. FELIX crosses back to left.) Thismust be the place. Just to look at itscares me half to death, but I’d bettertry. This must be the bell. (Pretends toring bell. There is a loud clanking.FELIX shivers. MR. MCMANUSenters, carrying cane and a flashlight.)

MR. MCMANUS (Crossly): A trick-or-treater! Bah! Go away. (Exits)

FELIX (Running right): Oh, goodness.That old man scares me half to death.I’ll try that house. (Points center)Perhaps it needs a ghost. (Goes center,pretends to knock)

WITCH (At curtain opening): Oh! Yay! Aghost! (Grabs FELIX by sleeve) Comeon in! (Curtains open.)

* * *SETTING: A living room decorated forHalloween. Chairs and tables are cov-ered with sheets.

AT RISE: PIRATE, TWO VAMPIRES,SKELETON, FAIRY, and OTHERCHILDREN are playing games.WITCH enters with FELIX.

WITCH: Look, everyone! A ghost!

OTHERS (Ad lib): Great! Every Hal-loween party needs a ghost. (Etc.)

SKELETON (To FELIX): What’s thematter? You’re shivering.

FELIX: I’m a nervous ghost. Childrenscare me half to death. (All laugh.)

2ND VAMPIRE: You’re a funny ghost.

WITCH (To FELIX): We’re playing agame like “go in and out the window.”When we catch someone, we try toguess who it is. If we don’t guess in

three tries, we let him go. If we doguess, he has to take his mask off andjoin the circle. Last one to be guessedgets the prize. O.K.? (Children withoutmasks join hands and form a circle,singing, “Go in and out the window,”while PIRATE, FAIRY, and FELIX goin and out. They catch PIRATE.)

SKELETON: I know who that is. It’sRobbie Wilson.

PIRATE (Disappointed): Oh, no! I didn’tthink anyone would guess. (Takes offmask, joins circle. They play again,this time catching FAIRY.)

1ST VAMPIRE: Is it Jenny White?(FAIRY shakes head.)

2ND VAMPIRE: Andrea Solomon?(FAIRY giggles.)

PIRATE: It’s Maeve O’Brien! I know hergiggle! (FAIRY takes off mask.)

WITCH: The ghost wins the prize. Butfirst, does anyone know who it is?

CHILDREN (Ad lib): I don’t. Must besomeone new. Take your mask off! (Etc.)

FELIX: I don’t have a mask.

WITCH: Just take your sheet off, so wecan tell who you are.

FELIX (Backing away): Oh, I can’t!

PIRATE: Come on! Take your sheet off!(PIRATE and SKELETON start forFELIX, who runs off.)

SKELETON: Wow! He just vanished intothin air!

FAIRY: I didn’t even see the door close.

WITCH: Wouldn’t that be funny! A realghost visiting a Halloween party. Oh,


well—time for refreshments. (All cheer.Curtain. FELIX peeks around it, thencomes out.)

FELIX (Sadly): Well, it’s back to the bel-fry for me. Why did the Lymans have tomove? We were all so happy together.

SAMANTHA (Entering): Felix! Felix!

FELIX (Happily): Samantha!

SAMANTHA: Listen, Felix, you have tocome and haunt the Lymans’ apart-ment. It’s not so bad. There’s a realspooky place under the eaves, and thewindows rattle and the doors squeak.

FELIX (Surprised): Really? In a newbuilding?

SAMANTHA: They don’t build apart-ment houses the way they used to.Besides, Owl has moved to the tree out-side, and the Lymans need you.

FELIX: They do?

SAMANTHA: They haven’t gotten to bedon time since they moved, so they don’tsleep well and they don’t wake up to getmy breakfast on time.

FELIX: Oh, my! Maybe I’ll take a runover there and have a look around.Come on, Samantha. (They exit.)

* * *SCENE 3

TIME: Later that day.

SETTING: Living room, same as Scene 1.

AT RISE: MR. and MRS. LYMAN aredozing over papers. FELIX peeks in,runs across stage, fans MR. and MRS.LYMAN with sleeve, slips behindMRS. LYMAN’s chair.

FELIX (Whispering in MRS. LYMAN’sear): Boo!

MRS. LYMAN (Sitting up with a start):My goodness! I do believe I had a littlecat nap. (MR. LYMAN sits up.) Did youfeel a draft?

MR. LYMAN: Yes. . .first time sincewe’ve been here.

MRS. LYMAN: Must be a window open.

MR. LYMAN (Looking at watch): Myword! It’s ten o’clock! Bedtime.

MRS. LYMAN: This is the first timewe’ve gone to bed at our usual bedtimesince we’ve been here.

MR. LYMAN: Kathryn, this place isbeginning to seem like home.

MRS. LYMAN: It is, isn’t it? I just felt ittonight. (Both exit, MRS. LYMANturning out table light. FELIX comesout from behind chair.)

FELIX: Here, kitty, kitty, kitty.Samantha, where are you?

SAMANTHA (Entering, stretching andyawning): Well, what do you think?

FELIX: They need me, all right. (Looksout window) Owl is still sleeping.

SAMANTHA: I’ll take care of that. (Goesto window and calls) Me-owl! Me-owl!

OWL (From offstage): Whoo? Whoo?

SAMANTHA: You know who, Owl. Goget your breakfast.

OWL (From offstage): Hoot! Hoot!

FELIX: There! (Stretches) I guess every-thing’s shipshape again.

SAMANTHA: And about time, too!(Curtain)

THE END(Production Notes on page 48)

OCTOBER 2016 39


I can find some tasty bugs. (TOR-TOISE enters right.)

TORTOISE: Good morning. I’m Tortoise.What a beautiful shell you have!

ARMADILLO: Thanks, your shell lookswonderful, too. I’m Armadillo.

TORTOISE: Are you visiting? I don’tremember seeing you around herebefore.

ARMADILLO: Actually, I’m planning onmaking this my new home.

TORTOISE: Great! Let’s be friends.

ARMADILLO: Good idea. I was wonder-ing—can you tell me where to find somegood bugs? I want to have breakfast.

TORTOISE: And you want to invite somebugs to eat with you?

ARMADILLO (Laughing): No, I eatthem.

TORTOISE: Afraid I can’t help you with

Armadillo’s ChoiceAnimals meet in the desert and learn to respect their

differences without asking each other to change. . . .

by Pamela Love

NARRATOR

ARMADILLO

TORTOISE

COYOTE

JACKRABBIT

SPARROW

TIME: A summer’s day.

SETTING: A desert in the AmericanSouthwest. Down left is a large cactus.Down right is a large rock. COYOTEhides behind rock, unseen by audience.

AT RISE: NARRATOR enters, stands atside of stage throughout play.ARMADILLO enters right.

NARRATOR: One fine day in the desert,an armadillo found a new place to live.

ARMADILLO (Stretching): What a beau-tiful morning! Time for breakfast. Hope

Characters

Armadillo’s Choice is protected by U.S.copyright law. It is unlawful to use thisplay in any way unless you are a currentsubscriber to PLAYS Magazine(www.playsmagazine.com).


that. I eat plants.

NARRATOR: But Armadillo wasn’t theonly one in the mood for breakfast. Justthen, a hungry coyote woke up and leftits hiding place. (COYOTE tiptoes outfrom behind rock.)

COYOTE: Ha! Thought I heard voices.Now to get something to eat! (Tiptoestoward ARMADILLO and TORTOISE.TORTOISE suddenly sees COYOTE.)

TORTOISE: Yikes! It’s a coyote!Armadillo, hide! (Hides under shell)

COYOTE: Whoops, it’s a tortoise! Can’tget inside that shell. My teeth willcrack. Oh, well. (Turns towardARMADILLO)

NARRATOR: Instead of hiding under ashell, Armadillo had another way ofreacting to danger.

ARMADILLO: Boo! (Jumps as high aspossible)

COYOTE (Scared): Arooo! (Exits left,running)

ARMADILLO (Kneeling beside TOR-TOISE): It’s all right now, Tortoise.You’re safe. That coyote’s gone. I scaredhim away.

NARRATOR: But the coyote wasn’t theonly one still afraid. (TORTOISE trem-bles inside shell. JACKRABBIT entersleft, jumping.)

JACKRABBIT: Hi there, I’m Jackrabbit.

ARMADILLO (Standing): Hi, I’m Arma-dillo.

JACKRABBIT (Pointing left, over shoul-der): Say, do you know what’s wrongwith Coyote? Didn’t even stop to chaseme, just ran by as fast as lightning.

ARMADILLO: I think it was because ofme. See, when I get scared, or angry, orreally surprised, I jump. (Jumps) Thistime I said, “Boo!”

JACKRABBIT: Hey, that’s some superjumping!

ARMADILLO: Thanks, you’re a greatjumper, too.

JACKRABBIT: I’ll have to try yelling“Boo!” sometime. Hey, let’s be friends.

ARMADILLO: That’s a fine idea. Youknow, I’m hungry. Can you tell mewhere the best bugs are around here?

JACKRABBIT: What, do bugs run restau-rants where you come from?

ARMADILLO (Laughing): No, can youtell me where the yummiest ones to eatare around here?

JACKRABBIT (Shaking head): Sorry, no.I eat plants.

TORTOISE (Poking head out of shell,then standing): Excuse me.

ARMADILLO (Smiling): Oh, there youare. Hello again, Tortoise. Do you knowJackrabbit?

TORTOISE (Frowning at JACKRAB-BIT): Unfortunately. Go away, Jack-rabbit. My friend and I don’t want youhere.

ARMADILLO: Hey! What kind of talk isthat, Tortoise? I can be friends withboth you and Jackrabbit.

TORTOISE: No, you can’t. Look! (Pointsat JACKRABBIT)

ARMADILLO (Looking at JACKRAB-BIT): I still don’t understand.

OCTOBER 2016 41

TORTOISE: You don’t? Hello? Or should Isay, (Taps shell) Shell-o? You and Ihave shells, Armadillo. Jackrabbit does-n’t. So Jackrabbit can’t be your friend.It’s as simple as that.

ARMADILLO (Jumping high): What!

JACKRABBIT (Smiling): It’s the otherway around, Tortoise. You’re the onemy friend Armadillo and I don’t wanthanging around.

ARMADILLO (Jumping high in the air):You too, Jackrabbit? Now what’s theproblem?

JACKRABBIT (To TORTOISE): See,Tortoise? You’re not a jumper, likeArmadillo and me. So you can’t be ourfriend. It’s as simple as that.

ARMADILLO (Jumping): Oh, come on!

TORTOISE: Just stop that silly jumping,Armadillo. Then Jackrabbit will goaway.

JACKRABBIT: Just get rid of that sillyshell, Armadillo. Then Tortoise will goaway.

TORTOISE: But it’s a whole lot easier tostop jumping than to get rid of a shell.See, I’ve got a shell (Taps shell) andyou’ll never see me jumping.

JACKRABBIT (Jumping in place): That’sbecause you can’t. Jumping is a lot morefun than just hiding under a shell, isn’tit, Armadillo? It was fun to scare offCoyote that way, wasn’t it?

ARMADILLO: But I like jumping andmyshell. I don’t want to choose betweenthem.

JACKRABBIT (Stops jumping): Life istough, and sometimes we have to makehard choices.

TORTOISE: Yes, as hard as my shell.(Taps shell) As hard as your shell, too.

ARMADILLO: I also like both of you.Although I’m starting to wonder why.

TORTOISE: Well, you can’t be friendswith both of us.

JACKRABBIT (Nodding): Right. Foronce, I actually agree with Tortoise. Youhave to choose between us.

ARMADILLO: I’ll think it over. (Crossesleft, lies down next to cactus) Guess I’llsleep on it.

NARRATOR: Finding a shady spot by acactus, Armadillo took a nap, not wak-ing up until the sun was high overhead.

ARMADILLO (Stretching, then stand-ing): Wow, I’m hungry! My tummy wasrumbling as loud as a tornado. I neverdid eat breakfast. Better start diggingfor my lunch. (Kneels, stars to “dig,”pretends to pop bugs into mouth)Mmm, yummy! (SPARROW entersleft.)

SPARROW (Flapping): Hello! Who areyou?

ARMADILLO: My name’s Armadillo.

SPARROW: I’m Sparrow. Want to befriends?

ARMADILLO: This morning, Tortoiseand Jackrabbit wanted me for a friend.But then they started bossing mearound. (Taps shell) Sparrow, I have ashell, not feathers like you. I won’tchange that.

SPARROW: Of course not.

ARMADILLO: Oh, and I can’t fly either.That’s also not going to change.

PRODUCTION NOTESArmadillo’s Choice


SPARROW: Why change at all? We canstill be friends.

ARMADILLO: But how? The two of usare so different.

SPARROW: You like eating bugs, right?Me, too. Isn’t that enough to start with?

ARMADILLO (Laughing): Do you knowwhere the best ones are?

SPARROW: Of course I do! Look underthe cactus. (TORTOISE and JACK-RABBIT cross to cactus.)

TORTOISE: Well, have you made up yourmind?

JACKRABBIT: Yeah, who’s going to beyour friend, Armadillo?

ARMADILLO: Whoever wants to be myfriend, unless they tell me to changewho I am. Meet my new friend,Sparrow. (SPARROW waves.)

TORTOISE (Tapping shell): But Sparrowdoesn’t have a shell.

JACKRABBIT (Jumping): And Sparrowdoesn’t jump.

ARMADILLO (Folding arms): Sparrowdoesn’t tell me what to do, either. (TOR-TOISE and JACKRABBIT look down,thinking it over.)

JACKRABBIT: Look, Armadillo, I’m sorryabout what I said before. I’d still like tobe friends with you.

TORTOISE: Me, too. And. . .and withyour friend, Sparrow.

JACKRABBIT (Nodding): If that’s O.K.with Sparrow.

ARMADILLO and SPARROW: Sure!

ARMADILLO: But right now, I’m goingto have something to eat.

SPARROW: Sounds like a good plan tome! (ARMADILLO and SPARROWkneel by cactus, start picking up bugs.)

TORTOISE: You know, Jackrabbit. . .

JACKRABBIT: Yes?

TORTOISE: With all that jumping, youprobably get around more than I do. Doyou know where the yummiest plantsgrow?

JACKRABBIT: I have some ideas. . .(Curtain)

NARRATOR: In real life, when it’s star-tled, the nine-banded armadillo canjump almost four feet into the air! Andremember, true friends respect you theway you are, instead of trying to changeyou.

THE END

CHARACTERS: 6 male or female.PLAYING TIME: 10 minutes.COSTUMES: May be as simple or elabo-rate as desired. Tortoise and Armadillohave “shells.” Jackrabbit has long ears.Sparrow has wings. Coyote has a tail.Narrator wears modern clothing.

PROPERTIES: None.SETTING: The desert. Large cactusdown left, large “rock” (big enough forCoyote to hide behind) down right.LIGHTING and SOUND: No specialeffects.

OCTOBER 2016 43


Congaree River outside of Charleston,South Carolina. The Redcoats areapproaching. Let us see what eventsunfold. . . .

* * *SETTING: The home of Rebecca Motteon the Congaree River, outside ofCharleston, South Carolina. Door andwindow are left.

AT RISE: REBECCA MOTTE and herdaughter, ELIZABETH, are sewing. Aknock is heard on the door.

ELIZABETH (Peering out the window):Mama, it’s a Redcoat!

REBECCA (Standing): Don’t worry,Elizabeth. We have been through thisbefore. (Opens door to CAPTAINMCPHERSON)

CAPTAIN MCPHERSON: Good after-noon, ma’am. Captain McPherson ofthe British army.

REBECCA: We have met before,Captain. I am Rebecca Brewton Motte.

Rebecca Motte: American PatriotSouth Carolinian sacrifices her home to help the

Colonial army defeat the British. . . .

by Tara Wise Montgomery

CAPTAIN MCPHERSON, British

officer

REBECCA MOTTE, Colonial widow

ELIZABETH MOTTE PINCKNEY,

Rebecca’s daughter

FRANCIS MARION, American general

HENRY LEE, American colonel

SCENE 1BEFORE RISE: NARRATOR enters,addresses audience.

NARRATOR: We often hear about thebrave men who fought in the AmericanRevolutionary War, but little is knownabout the courageous women who alsosacrificed much for their country. Onesuch woman was Rebecca Motte, awidow who showed great patriotism andselflessness during an important eventin the war. The year is 1781 and the set-ting is the Motte plantation home on the

Characters

Rebecca Motte: American Patriot is pro-tected by U.S. copyright law. It isunlawful to use this play in any wayunless you are a current subscriber toPLAYS Magazine(www.playsmagazine.com).


You and your men took residence at myfamily’s town house when your armyoccupied Charleston.

CAPTAIN: Why, of course! I rememberyou very well, Mrs. Motte. You werequite hospitable to my officers and me.

REBECCA: What business do you havehere today?

CAPTAIN: I’m afraid we must ask you tovacate the premises. We feel that yourplantation would be an excellent loca-tion for a fort.

REBECCA: A fort? But sir, this is myhome. My husband died recently. Myfamily and I have nowhere else to go.

CAPTAIN: I noticed a deserted farm-house about a mile from here. You andyour family can stay there. My men andI will occupy your home.

REBECCA: Surely there are better loca-tions for you to choose. Couldn’t youfind another place? After all, this is notthe first time my family has providedyou with headquarters.

CAPTAIN: There is no use arguing, Mrs.Motte. You and your family can go qui-etly, or my officers will have to removeyou from the premises by force. Youshould be flattered that we are sparingyour home rather than burning it to theground as we have others.

REBECCA (Sighing): Very well, Captain.I will go quietly for my children’s sake.I would do anything to protect them.

NARRATOR: So Rebecca and her familymoved to a small farmhouse on herplantation while Captain McPhersonand his soldiers took possession of herhome. They dug an enormous trencharound her property and cut downmany of her beautiful trees to build a

barricade. But the occupation would notbe for long. A Patriot force led by theAmerican general Francis Marion wasdetermined to force McPherson and hismen to surrender. For five days theylaid siege on the Motte home withoutsuccess. Before long Marion andGeneral Henry Lee paid a visit to Mrs.Motte.

* * *SCENE 2

SETTING: Farmhouse on the Motteproperty. As with the plantation home,there are a door and window left.

AT RISE: REBECCA and ELIZABETHare sewing.

ELIZABETH: I don’t know how you standit, Mama. Being so polite to those menand catering to them so cheerfully, afterthey forced us out of our home.

REBECCA: Well, my dear, it isn’t alwayseasy. In life, we are all called upon atone time or another to do something wedon’t want to do; however, your grand-parents raised me to be a lady in all cir-cumstances. I hope that I have instilledthose values in you as well. Besides, thewar can’t last forever.

ELIZABETH: I hope you are right. We’vealready lost Papa, and my dear Thomasis convalescing. I don’t know how muchlonger I can take this. I don’t have yourstamina. (Gets up to walk around)

REBECCA: We must stay strong, Eliza-beth! The hardest thing for me is thatas women we can do so little to assist inthe war effort. The men fight coura-geously while we are left behind to tendto our homes and wait. I wish there wassomething more we could do to help.

ELIZABETH (Looking out window): Mama,I see two men approaching the house.

REBECCA: Can you see who they are? I

OCTOBER 2016 45

hope it is not Captain McPherson or oneof his men. It’s not quite time for theirsupper yet. Since I serve them threemeals a day, one would think theywould allow us some peace and quiet inbetween.

ELIZABETH (Peering out the window):They’re not wearing red coats.

REBECCA: That sounds promising!(There is a knock at the door. ELIZA-BETH looks at her mother hesitantly.)Go on and answer it, dear. Let’s seewhat they want. (ELIZABETHanswers door to FRANCIS MARIONand HENRY LEE.)

FRANCIS MARION (As he and LEEenter): Good afternoon, ladies. I amGeneral Francis Marion and this isColonel Henry Lee.

ELIZABETH: Not the Francis Marion!Oh, sir, we are honored!

MARION (Bowing): The honor is mine.

ELIZABETH: I’ve heard you called “TheSwamp Fox” because you’ve outsmartedthe Redcoats so many times, leadingthem into the swamps and escaping.

MARION (Chuckling): Guilty ascharged, ma’am. It’s the only type ofwarfare that seems to be effective withthese British.

ELIZABETH (To LEE): And you, Sir—you are called “Lighthorse Harry”?

LEE: Ah, yes, madam! Some people liketo call me that.

ELIZABETH: I have heard it said thatyou are a great cavalry leader.

LEE: I am surprised that you have heardof me. I am proud to do what I can forour country.

ELIZABETH: Well, by all means, come in,gentlemen! You don’t want to stand out-side where the British can see you. (ToREBECCA) Mama, did you hear?

REBECCA (Standing): Yes, Elizabeth.General Marion, Colonel Lee. It is apleasure. We are honored to have youvisit our home. I am Rebecca Motte, andthis is my daughter Elizabeth Pinckney.

MARION: Just as you have heard of us,we have also heard of you. Your familyis well known for its patriotism and loveof the Colonial ideals.

LEE: We have learned of your recentplight, with the British driving you outof your home and occupying it as theirheadquarters.

REBECCA: That is correct, General.

MARION: We have attempted to forceCaptain McPherson and his officers tosurrender, without success.

REBECCA: I can’t say I’m surprised. Heseems quite relentless.

LEE: We do have a plan in place, but Iam afraid that it will require much co-operation and more sacrifice from you.

REBECCA (Surprised): I’ll be happy tohelp in any way I can, but I can’t imag-ine what I can possibly do.

MARION: Well, Mrs. Motte, in order tocoerce the Redcoats to surrender, wehave no choice but to set fire to yourhome. (ELIZABETH raises her handto her mouth in alarm.)

LEE: We are so sorry, ma’am, but wehave exhausted all other means.

REBECCA (Gasping): Burn my home?

MARION: It is the only way. Believe me,


if there were any other alternative, wewould consider it, but we must force theBritish from your home, and burning itis the only way to do it.

REBECCA (Her expression becomingstrong and determined): I love myhome, but I love my country more. Youare quite right, gentlemen. It is the onlyway. I am proud to have the opportuni-ty to serve the Colonies.

LEE: You are a courageous woman, Mrs.Motte.

REBECCA: As a matter of fact, I thinkthere is something more I can do tohelp. Please excuse me for just amoment. (REBECCA exits left. Themen stand shrugging their shoulders.)

MARION (To ELIZABETH): I can’timagine what more your mother can doto help us.

ELIZABETH: I believe I know exactlywhat she has in mind!

LEE: Your family has already made somany sacrifices to the cause.

ELIZABETH: We would do more if wecould. Mama was just saying that to mebefore you came. (REBECCA entersleft, carrying arrows.)

REBECCA: These are combustiblearrows. My brother Miles Brewtonbrought them from East India.Somehow I knew they might be usefulto me one day.

MARION: You amaze me, Madam!

LEE (Taking the arrows): Thank you,ma’am. Because of patriots like you,men and women, our cause will prevail!

REBECCA: You did not have to pay methe courtesy of asking to burn my home.Only true gentlemen would have afford-

ed that opportunity.

MARION: It is you who humble us, Mrs.Motte.

LEE: Our men stand waiting for ourorders.

REBECCA: I am coming with you. Iwould like to witness this event.

NARRATOR: “The Siege of Fort Motte,”as it was called in the history books,had lasted five days, but with RebeccaMotte’s assistance, it came to a quickend. Francis Marion’s men set fire tothe roof of the Motte home with the helpof the arrows Rebecca had provided.

* * *SCENE 3

SETTING: Outside the Motte “fort.” Maybe played before curtain.

AT RISE: REBECCA and ELIZABETHstand center, looking out over audi-ence.

ELIZABETH: Oh, look, Mama! GeneralMarion and his men are shooting thearrows onto our roof!

REBECCA: And they are bursting intoflames on contact! Just as my brothersaid they would! How I wish he couldhave been alive to see this!

ELIZABETH: Look at all the smoke!

REBECCA: I see men running outside!The plan is working! (CAPTAIN runson, waving a white flag and coughing.He collapses on the ground.)

CAPTAIN: We surrender! We surrender!

MARION (Offstage): Take possession ofMrs. Motte’s home and put out theflames! (Enters left) Well, Mrs. Motte,thanks to your help we have secured avictory.

CAPTAIN: You are a clever leader,Marion. How did you set the fire soquickly?

MARION: Combustible arrows, Captain.Supplied by Mrs. Motte!

CAPTAIN (Surprised): Mrs. Motte!(LEE enters left.)

LEE: Thank goodness we were able tosave your home in the process, Mrs.Motte. Only the roof burned. The struc-ture is intact!

REBECCA: I am most grateful indeed,gentlemen. Losing my home would havebeen worth it to help our cause, but Iam relieved that it was spared—for mychildren’s sake especially. Now if youwill excuse me, I have a dinner to pre-

pare. For everyone! (Exits with ELIZA-BETH, right)

LEE: Quite an extraordinary lady!

MARION: Extraordinary, indeed. Weare fortunate to have Patriots like her.(They lead CAPTAIN off right.)

NARRATOR: Rebecca, in accordancewith her generous nature, went on toserve dinner to both Redcoat andPatriot soldiers that evening. She is awoman to whom we can look as anexample of strength and courage duringtrying times. When praised for herbravery later in life, Rebecca repliedthat she did “what any other Americanwould have done.”

THE END

OCTOBER 2016 47

PRODUCTION NOTESRebecca Motte: American Patriot

CHARACTERS: 3 male, 2 female.PLAYING TIME: 15 minutes.COSTUMES: Rebecca and Elizabethwear long dresses and caps in theColonial style. Soldiers wear appropri-ate uniforms, red coat for McPherson,Continental uniforms for Marion andLee.PROPERTIES: Sewing materials; arrows;white flag.SETTING: Scene 1, the home of Rebecca

Motte on the Congaree River, outsideof Charleston, South Carolina. Doorand window are left. Chairs, tables,other furnishings as desired. Scene 2,farmhouse on the Motte property. Aswith the plantation home, there are adoor and window left. Simpler fur-nishings than in Scene 1. Scene 3 maybe played before curtain.LIGHTING: No special effects.SOUND: Knock on door.

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A House to Haunt(Play on pages 35-38)

PRODUCTION NOTESThe Magic Wishing Ring(Play on pages 29-34)

CHARACTERS: 3 male (Mr. Lyman,Felix, Mr. McManus); 2 female (Mrs.Lyman, Samantha); 12+ male orfemale for all other characters.PLAYING TIME: 15 minutes.COSTUMES: Everyday dress forLymans and Mr. McManus. Otherswear appropriate animal or Halloweencostumes.PROPERTIES: Newspapers; cane; flash-light.

SETTING: Scenes 1 and 3: Lymans’ liv-ing room. There are two easy chairs,lamp and table, and any other furnish-ings desired. Scene 2: Halloween party.Same as Scenes 1 and 3, with sheetsdraped over furniture, and Halloweendecorations.LIGHTING: No special effects.SOUND: Creaking and rattling chains,etc.; doorbell.

CHARACTERS: 4 male, 3 female, 10male or female.PLAYING TIME: 20 minutes.COSTUMES: Pixie wears rose-coloredpixie outfit, with leather pouch on acord at her waist, and carries smalltoy musical pipe. Captain Grammarwears long robe with flowing sleeves,and tall cap; may carry a scroll. Parts

of Speech wear colorful tunics andtights, and feathered caps. Childrenwear modern school dress.PROPERTIES: Ball, school books.SETTING: A wooded park. A thick ringof green moss encircles a tree and atree stump. Some bushes are acrossthe upstage right corner.LIGHTING: No special effects.

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