the 5'c's in marriage

The 5Cs Important in

Marriage

Marriage is an important institution based on relationships, understanding, forgiveness, love, endurance, etc and a letter ‘C’ is important too. ‘C’ is an incomplete circle and if not handled well can make the going in marriage not easy.

Kigume KaruriSunday, October 15, 2017 1

5Cs in Marriage

• 1. Caring for Each Other in Marriage

• 2. Cooperation in Marriage

• 3. Courage in Marriage

• 4. Curiosity in Marriage

• 5. Common-Sense in Marriage

Sunday, October 15, 2017 Kigume Karuri 2

1. Caring for Each Other in Marriage

A man and woman usually decide to marry because they have formed a very successful romantic relationship. They are in love with each other and are meeting each other's intimate emotional needs.


They want to make that romantic relationship last a lifetime, so they marry. At the time, they are optimistic about keeping their love for each other alive, and they don't expect anything to threaten that love.


• The two essential ingredients of a romantic relationship are being in love and meeting intimate emotional needs and they are inseparable.


• Intimate emotional needs can only be met when a couple are able to give each other their undivided attention. The pressure of family life, with so many wants and limited available resources, is yet another factor that makes undivided attention elusive.


• When opportunity for undivided attention is taken from a couple, the meeting of intimate emotional needs is no longer possible. And when the meeting of intimate emotional needs is no longer possible, the love a man and woman have for each other withers and dies. And when their love for each other is gone, the risk of divorce is extremely high.


• Couples marry because they think their romantic relationship will continue throughout their lives. And it would, if they were to continue meeting each other's intimate emotional needs.


• As long as a husband and wife take the time to meet these needs for each other every week of their lives, they will never lose the passion that they had the moment they were married. But it takes time to meet these needs, and it takes privacy.


• 2. Cooperation in Marriage

• Cooperation is the basis for building an effective relationship involving two people. When you have two people whose hearts are set on similar things, their minds work together, their plans are the same, and their objectives are the same.


• That’s cooperation, and that’s how marriage should work. Avoid competition in marriage completely.

• You can’t build an effective relationship until you avoid selfishness. Selfishness often happens whenever a decision has to be made between you and your partner. You don’t even have to work at it. Selfishness is the great hindrance to cooperation


• Always seek to cooperate. When couples do things together there is synergy and they can achieve more than they would have achieved individually.

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• 3. Courage in Marriage

• One requires to have courage in his/ her heart and mind as it is courage that makes him/her take the steps. Courage has to do with action.

• A courageous couple is not afraid to fail.

• A courageous couple is not afraid to take risks.


• A courageous couple journeys against the grain sometimes, either saying yes or no

• A courageous couple is not afraid to stand alone when necessary.

• When we enter into marriage, we are amateurs. We have no skills or experience. It will take courage to stand up even in difficult circumstances when one can easily give up.


• Courageous couples don’t worry about things that are out of their control or things that are unlikely to happen. They concentrate on what they can control. Don’t worry about things you have no control over. As the husband or wife do what you have control of.


• 4. Curiosity in Marriage

• The desire to make your marriage and your spouse succeed is part of marriage. It can work positively or negatively on us depending on how you handle it. Curiosity can lead to understanding things that your spouse does and you desire to learn them.


• The desire to know becomes more important than the desire to be right. The desire to learn from each other leads to better decisions in the relationships.In the end the spouses make a decision that is better than if one was deciding alone.

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• Curiosity says to your partner he or she is valued and loved. A person is valued when someone wants to know them, to know what they are thinking and feeling. It is no wonder we begin almost any interaction with the words, “How are you doing? How is it going today?”


• To be understood is a powerful and unique gift. As a couple, we cannot just make pronouncements to each other; we both want to be heard. We are committed to have a conversation.


• We value each other’s opinion. We value each other enough to disagree. In the end that makes our marriage stronger and our lives better. Together we do our best thinking and make our best decisions.

• Be curious. Ask questions. Be willing to answer them. Instead of being defensive, strive to know your spouse, and what he or she is thinking or feeling.


• Curiosity will make your marriage stronger and happier.

• Be curious. Ask questions. Be willing to answer them. Instead of being defensive, strive to know your spouse, and what he or she is thinking or feeling. Curiosity will make your marriage stronger and happier.


• 5. Common-Sense in Marriage

• You don’t need to be a student of marriage in engaging your spouse and enjoying a long-lasting and passionate relationship. Learn to do things that bring sense to you and the marriage. Your spouse is a human being and will appreciate you. Be original. Simple acts are very crucial.


• Talk nicely to your spouse: Communicate your need for intimacy, what you need to maintain a healthy level of physical intimacy and how to compromise.

• Listen attentively: Communicating your physical needs accomplishes nothing if you are unable to meet your spouse halfway and place equal importance on listening to her or him.


• Compromise: Don’t pursue selfish ends. Always seek to compromise.

• Schedule time to be together: Learn to schedule time to be together. Don’t assume that your spouse understands.


• Finally

• The above 5Cs will make you value each other more and hence you can make the most of the marriage. Challenges will come into your marriage but they will also make you stronger. Others may not understand what you are passing through, but in the end both of you will be.


• See the good side of the letter ‘C’.

• Avoid the ‘C’ in ComplainSunday, 15 October 2017ing, Commanding, Contemplating, Contours, Competing, etc .

ENJOY TOUR MARRIAGE


the 5'c's in marriage

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