the emperor's new clothes - act 2 - ccptheatre.com · millie & pippa: (with mirrors) look...

The Emperor’s New Clothes 23 Section L Act 2

ACT 2

The Great Hall

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Section L

Gretchen: I didn‟t sleep a wink. All night I kept hearin‟ bang, clonk, chigga chigga boom. It

was comin‟ from the weaver‟s room. What‟do ya think‟s goin‟ on in there?

Lindy-Loo: I don‟t rightly know. We need to figure out a way to get in that room so we can take

a sneak peek of what behind curtain number one.

Gretchen: We need to do a little investigatin‟ on this here issue. Ain‟t nobody pullin‟ the wool

over our eyes.

Lindy-Loo: I‟m allergic to wool anyway. Makes me itch, then I break out in hives.

Gretchen: What if what those weavers said is true? You know, about only the wise and smart

being able to see that their cloth?

Lindy-Loo: I was wonderin‟ the same thing.

Gretchen: If it is true… (shake heads)

Lindy-Loo: Those poor princesses. (Commerce walks toward desk)

King: (to Commerce) Hello, Minister.

Commerce: (Small bow) Your Highness.

King: Well... what do you think?

Commerce: Frankly, I think there are a few problems with the royal budget.

King: No, no. I mean, what do you think of my outfit?

Commerce: Very nice. Now, about that budget...

King: Ah, yes, the budget. I would like to raise the amount allowed for cufflinks and

cummerbunds. I simply cannot bear a cuff without a link, and a cummer without a bun.

(Laugh)

Commerce: But Your Highness…the budget!

King: That, my Royal Subject, can wait.

Commerce: But the weavers are asking for more money.

King: Then bring it to them. (King looks in mirror) Look at me. Look - at - me.

Millie & Pippa: (with mirrors) Look at me. Look - at - me.

Gretchen: Quick! Pinch me! (Lindy-Loo pinches her) Ow! It‟s just as I surspected. Those two

off-spring of theirs have it too. They‟ve been infected.

Lindy-Loo: You‟re right! They got the “stuck up” disease. Now we gotta deal with a whole

nuther generation of snobs.

Prince: Mother, the weavers are asking for more gold and silver.

Queen: Then have the Minister of Commerce give it to them.

Prince: I just spoke with the Minister of Commerce. He (she) said we‟ve given the weavers

almost all of our savings. At this rate, we‟ll be completely broke in no time.

Queen: Well, that doesn‟t sound too bad.

The Emperor’s New Clothes 24 Section M Act 2

Prince: That doesn‟t sound too bad? Mother, listen to yourself.

King: What? Don‟t move! Is this a flaw I see? Oh, never mind. False alarm. It‟s just dirt on

the mirror.

Prince: Have either of you seen this so-called magical cloth?

Queen: We haven‟t had time.

Prince: Maybe you should make time. Something that is costing you your entire fortune should

probably be looked into.

Queen; Have you eaten today? You look a little pale.

Prince: I can‟t get anywhere with you two. (Prince walks away. Queen goes to Princesses)

King: Maybe he‟s right. Maybe I should go and see the cloth. But what if…. (2:30)

SONG 10 What If

King: What if I go to see but there‟s nothin‟ there I see

Will everyone know that I am blind to what‟s right in front of me

Suppose I‟m asked to tell them what I think of the design

What do I say about a cloth I cannot even find

I know I shouldn‟t worry, I‟m the Emperor, the King

But what if somethin‟ goes wrong and I walk in and don‟t see a thing

Worry, worry, „till I lose my mind - Gotta relax – „Cause I‟ll be fine

I‟m the King of the Castle – The brightest one around

I‟m the King of the Castle – No smarter one can be found

No other ruler throughout the land is as smart as I am

I‟ve got an idea brewing and it‟s about to burst

What if I sent the workers in to see the cloth first

Then they would report back to me of what they see

I would know who was dumb and who was wise like me

It‟s clever – It‟s a perfectly crafted plan

It‟s a brilliant design from the mind of a brilliant man

I‟m the King of the Castle – The brightest one around

I‟m the King of the Castle – No smarter one can be found

No other Ruler throughout the land is as smart as I am

I‟m the King of the castle – The King of the castle – Yes, I am (2:30)

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Section M

(Court Herald walks up behind the King)

King: I‟ll send all of my advisors to look at the cloth for me. This way, I can tell which ones are

wise and which ones aren‟t. I shall start with the Court Herald. (calls for Court Herald)

Court Herald, report to me at once. (Minister sneaks up and hides behind him, King turns

from side to side looking for him) Where is he(she)? Where did he(she) go? He(she) was

right here. (sees Court Herald) There you are.

Court Herald: Good afternoon, Emperor. I was just on my way to check on the unicorns. (starts

to walk away)

King: Get get get back here. Before you do that, I want you to go and check on the fabric.

The Emperor’s New Clothes 25 Section N Act 2

Court Herald: Me? You should send…those two. (gestures to Gretchen and Lindy-Loo) They

are wise, educated and insightful. (stares at Gretchen and Lindy-Loo)

King: I‟ve chosen you, my trusted Minister, because I don‟t want to send someone who‟s not

going to be able to see the cloth.

Court Herald: (nervously) I‟ll go right away. (1:00)

SONG 11 Weaving (Transition into weaving room)

Castle Court: Weaving, weaving – Busy beavers weaving

All the day they slave away – Weaving, weaving (0:30)

The Weavers’ Room -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Section N

Guido: Both of you, start weaving.

Luichi: Start weaving? We don‟t even know how to weave.

Sly: Yeah, we‟ve never woven anything in our lives. It looks like a mouse trap to me.

Guido: You just sit and pretend. This is the way we weave the cloth. Notice my steady rhythm

on the loom. One and two and...

Guido, Luichi & Sly: One and two and one and two and... (:30)

SONG 12 Deception

Guido: We got the loot - We got the money in our hands

It‟s all ours - We‟ll be the richest in the land

No one could of done what we did - We‟re the greatest cons that‟s ever lived

Luichi: All this gold - All these precious, shiny gems

Look at me - I can barely carry them

For the rest of our lives we‟ll have anything we dream

We‟re the smartest, richest swindler team

Sly: We‟ll buy clothes - The most expensive hat at shoes

We will eat - Just like a king that we once knew

All the food that we can find will go into this belly of mine (talking)

Guido: Did you say that will cost a million, trillion, ga-zillion gold coins?

Luichi: Yes, I did.

Guido: Well, I happen… to have it!

Guido: Well, I happen… to have it! (all three laugh)

Sly: What do I want? Let‟s see… I‟ll take… that… and that… and that and that and that and

that and that. I‟ll take everything! (All three laugh and then dance)

The Emperor’s New Clothes 26 Section N Act 2

Guido: Look as us - I never thought that I would see

The three of us - As such a happy family

We‟ve pulled off the greatest crime

The best deception of all time (2:00)

(Knock. Guido goes to peep hole and looks through)

Guido: It‟s one of the workers. I bet the King sent „em to check on us.

Luichi: (pacing nervously) We‟re sooo busted. We‟re so busted.

Sly: (sit and rock) Go to a happy place. Go to a happy place. (keep repeating until Guido tells

you to stop)

Luichi: It‟s over. I don‟t wanna die yet. I‟m too young. What are we gonna do? What are we

gonna do?

Guido: Would you both stop! Now hurry up and look busy! (Luichi starts doing jumping jacks

and Sly starts doing push-ups) No! Act like your weaving! (Guido opens the door) Good

afternoon, employed worker of the Castle. How can we help you?

Court Herald: I‟ve come to see the cloth. (looks around and sees nothing) Have you not

started? (wipes the sweat from his/her forehead)

Guido: Not started? You‟re funny. Come in. Please, come close so that you can get a good look.

Luichi: And, of course, you will be able to see the cloth. Everyone in the kingdom knows that

you are wise.

Sly: Do the patterns in the material please you?

Court Herald: (slowly nod head “yes” but look confused as he/she wipes the sweat from his/her

forehead)

Sly: What color is the color that you see?

Court Herald: It‟s bright color of... uh... uh...

Mind of Court Herald: (do not memorize. This will be pre-recorded) I can’t see a thing! Not

one thing! What is this? A trick? A joke? Or am I just not wise enough to see it. Oh, no. I

can’t let anyone know that I cannot see the cloth. If the King found out, I would lose my job

at the palace.

Court Herald: It‟s the bright color of… (pause) Red?

Weavers: (Ad Lib: Yes, of course that‟s the color).

Court Herald: Ah, yes, red. I will go right away and report on what a fine job you‟re doing.

(starts walking out of room)

Guido: Ask „em if he likes paisley, we can do that too.

(Court Herald turns to leave when there is a knock at the door. Commerce enters)

Court Herald: (whispers to Commerce) Look hard. You‟ll see it. I promise. (leaves)

Commerce: Here is the money you… (panic scream) (all stare at the loom)

Guido: I see you‟re at a loss for words, Minister. (Guido takes the money as he talks.

Commerce stays frozen) I know it‟s beautiful, but your reaction is priceless. What a

compliment.

Luichi: What admiration for our work.

Sly: You don‟t see nothin‟, do you?

Commerce: Of course I see it. If I didn‟t, then I would be thought of as not wise, and I am wise.

Guido: Step this way minister. As you can see, it‟s still on the loom. Lean a little closer so you

can observe the intricate patterns.

Luichi: Wanna touch it? (Sly takes Commerce’s hand and touches the cloth)

The Emperor’s New Clothes 27 Section O Act 2

Commerce: So…. soft.

Sly: Now tell me, is that a cloth or is that a cloth.

Commerce: It‟s magnificent. What an amazing color of uh... uh... uh... green?

Weavers: (Ad Lib: Yes, of course that’s the color).

Commerce: Ah, yes, green. What craftsmanship. Keep up the good work.

(As soon as Commerce leaves, the weavers start laughing and making fun of them)

Guido: Let‟s go walk around the castle and see if there‟s anything we… want.

Luichi: You mean see if there‟s anything we want… to steal?

Guido: Yes, that‟s exactly what I mean.

Sly: What if more of those Ministers come to look at the cloth? They told us that we weren‟t

allowed to leave this room. If they see we‟re not here, we‟ll be in big trouble.

Guido: You mean we should follow the rules? Now, what fun would that be?

Luichi: I‟m in.

Sly: I‟m in, too.

Guido: We‟ll be back before they even know we‟re gone. (3:00)

SONG 13 What We Are (Transition into Great Hall)

Guido: We‟re con men, drifters, sweet talking crooks

We‟re barracudas, cheats with good looks

The folks we swindle, we take them down to size

And fool them with our beautiful lies (0:30)

The Great Hall

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Section O

(Court Herald enters Great Hall)

King: Court Herald, you‟re back. Come and tell us what you saw.

Queen: Were the colors just fabulous? Were the patterns outstanding?

Court Herald: It was there on the loom all shiny and (pause) red.

Gretchen: Well, scratch my back and spit out fleas.

Lindy-Loo: And I thought all you could do was blow that horn. I guess the Herald is wise after

all. (Commerce enters Great Hall)

Queen: Minister of Commerce, did you pay the weavers?

Commerce: Yes I did.

Queen: Did you see the cloth, too?

Commerce: Yes, yes I did. I saw the cloth. I saw it right there on the loom. Yes, I did. Yep.

Yep. Right there… on that loom. Yes.

Queen: What did it look like?

Commerce: What did it look like? It was… (pause) green.

Queen: But the Court Herald said that it was red.

The Emperor’s New Clothes 28 Section O Act 2

Commerce: A hint of green. But red was the base color.

Queen: Tell us more. We want to hear all about it. (1:00)

SONG 14 Fabulous!

Commerce: The cloth was fabulous, totally marvelous, an amazing sight

Everything about it is guaranteed to suit you just right

Wait till you try it on for size you won‟t believe what you see

It‟ll fit like nothin‟ else I guarantee

The finest of fabrics that‟ll make you look elegant and sleek

And no one will be wearin‟ what you‟ll be wearin‟ you‟ll be totally unique

King: I‟ll rock it out – I‟ll tear it up – I‟ll jam to the beat in the magical suit

Wait „till you see this King – I‟ve got the moves

Court Herald: It‟s been tailored just for you the material is light

It‟s perfectly made for every season and will keep you warm at night

An impeccable fit, down to every stitch

When you wear it everyone will scream

Look at you, you look so cool and you‟ll think you‟re in a dream





Castle Court: The cloth was fabulous, totally marvelous, an amazing sight

Everything about it is guaranteed to suit you just right

Wait till you try it on for size you won‟t believe what you see

It‟ll fit like nothin‟ else I guarantee





(Court and King sing the lines below at the same time)

Castle Court: He‟ll rock it out – He‟ll tear it up – He‟ll jam to the beat in the magical suit

Wait „till we see this King – He‟s got the moves


Wait „till you see this King – I‟ve got the moves (3:00)

Fashion: Your Highness, here is our latest design. What do you think?

King: It‟s…okay.

Fashion: Just okay?

Queen: I want both of you to the weaver‟s chamber and make sure they have all the material

they need.

Style: Yes, dear Queen, we‟ll go at once.

Queen: And bring back a sample of this wonderful cloth. (.30)

The Emperor’s New Clothes 29 Section P Act 2

SONG Weaving (Transition into weaving room) (Reprise)



The Weavers’ Room --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Section P

(Knock on door. Fashion and Style enter the room, and the weavers are gone)

Fashion: Okay, the Minister said the fabric was on the loom.

Style: On the loom.

Fashion: The Queen said we must bring a sample back to her, so… get the fabric.

Style: Right, get the fabric.

Fashion: Go on, get the fabric.

Style: I thought we agreed that you were gonna get the fabric.

Fashion: No we didn‟t. You suggested that I get it. I never agreed to that.

Style: Fine, we‟ll get it together. Here we go.

Fashion: Okay. (Go to loom) (Circle once, stop. Circle again, stop. Circle again, stop) On

three. 1, 2, 3… 3… (Loud) 3…

Style: (frustrated) I can count.

Fashion: Okay. (count fast) 1, 2, 3. What are you doing?

Style: I‟m waiting for you, (sassy) Minister of Fashion. (start arguing).

(Weavers enter)

Guido: Ministers. (Fashion and Style scream and circle loom) I didn‟t mean to startle you.

Fashion: We were just admiring your beautiful work here.

Style: Beautiful!

Fashion: Beautiful!

Guido: Please, come close so that you can get a good look.


you are wise.


Fashion and Style: (nod head “yes” but look confused)


Fashion: Oh, well, its bright, vibrant, loud color of...uh...uh...uh...

Fashion: Yellow.

Style: (say your color at the same time Fashion says yellow) Blue.

Fashion: Blue.

Style: (say your color at the same time Fashion says blue) Yellow.

Guido: You see the swirling yellow and blue patterns, yes?

Fashion and Style: (Ad Lib: Oh, yes. Yes, the swirling swirls all swirling around and swirling.

Look at them swirling) (1:30)

The Emperor’s New Clothes 30 Section P Act 2

SONG 15 I Am Wise

Fashion: At first I was afraid, I was petrified

Kept thinkin‟ I could never see the cloth with my own eyes

But then I spent so many hours readin‟ all that I could read

So I‟d be smart – „Cause you said only the wise can see

And so I came – And checked it out

I just walked in and found it there – I saw the cloth without a doubt – Oh

I know that when you came in you could see it, too.

Style: Yes I could, yes, I saw, with its yellow and blue

Oh, and I – I must confess

I wasn‟t sure that I would see it there – Would I pass the test – Oh

Only the fools are the ones who cannot see

And now I know that fool is not me

Fashion & Style: Oh yes, I – I can see

The lovely cloth that you are weavin‟ – Wish the outfit was for me

Fashion: I‟d prance around all day with my head held up high

And all would know how smart I was as I passed them by

Fashion & Style: Oh and I – I am wise

I saw the cloth on the loom with my very eyes

I love the swirls of colors yellow and blue

I am wise – Yeah, I am wise – Hey – Hey (1:30)

Guido: Now go and tell everyone of the lovely swirling patterns you both saw.

Luichi & Sly: (circle as if to dance) Swirling.

Fashion and Style: (Mimic them) Swirling.

Luichi & Sly: (circle as if to dance) Swirling.

Fashion and Style: (Mimic them) Swirling.

(Minister keeps doing it as they leave the room as the weavers spin their fingers as if to prompt

him to keep making circles.)

Fashion and Style: (Circle) Swirling. (Circle) Swirling. (Circle) Swirling. (Circle) Swirling.

(Once they leave, the weavers start laughing and making fun of them as they swirl themselves

and laugh) (0:30)

SONG What We Are (Transition into Great Hall) (Reprise)

Luichi: We‟re con men, drifters, sweet talking crooks




The Great Hall

The Emperor’s New Clothes 31 Section R Act 2

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Section Q

Queen: Ministers, did you bring us back a sample of the cloth?

Fashion: It was way too delicate to cut, Your Highness.

Style: We didn‟t want to mess up such unblemished work.

Fashion: Only the best for you, Your Highness.

Style: Only the best for you, Your Majesty.

Queen: What did it look like?

Fashion: It‟s truly the most radiant fabric in the world. It had a swirling pattern of yellow and

blue.

Style: And blue and yellow.

Millie: I wanna go see the cloth, Mother.

Pippa: I wanna go see the cloth, too.

Queen: Not a good idea, girls.

Millie & Pippa: Why not?

Queen: (whispers to them) What if you go and can‟t see the cloth?

Millie: Of course we‟ll be able to see the cloth, Mother. We are Royal Princesses.

Pippa: We‟re smart and wise.

Queen: But you‟re also young. What if the cloth can only be seen by those that are older in age?

You know, those that are life experienced.

Millie: You mean old?

Queen: Well, that‟s one way of putting it.

Millie: Don‟t worry, Mother. We can take care of ourselves.

Pippa: Come on. Millie. Let‟s go see that amazing cloth. (Millie and Pippa start to leave)

King: Minister of Entertainment, (Entertainment walks over to King) watch over the girls.

Entertainment: You want me to babysit them? I really don‟t think that‟s in my job description,

sire.

King: (loudly) Move it!

Entertainment: (Throws music sheets in air) Yes, Sire. Right away. I shall enjoy babysitting

the little ones. (1:30)




The Weavers’ Room --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Section R

Guido: What a master plan this has turned out to be.

Luichi: Do you really think we can pull this off?

Guido: Of course I do. It‟s gonna be a piece of cake.


Sly: So, what happens to us if they find out what we‟re doing?

Guido: They won‟t, trust me. (Knock on door. Guido goes and looks in the peep hole) It‟s the

two Princesses, look productive. (Guido opens the door) Why, hello Princess Spoiled and

Princess Rotten.

Millie: It‟s Princess Millie.

Pippa: And Princess Pippa.

Guido: Oh, well, at least I was close. What can we do for you today?

Millie: We‟ve come to see how you are doing.

Luichi: I would say that we are doing very well.

Pippa: We would like to see the magic cloth you‟re making.

Sly: Me, too! (Guido and Luichi turn to Sly and whisper “shut up”) What?

Guido: Yes, yes. Come in. Please, come close so that you can get a good look.


you are wise.


Millie & Pippa: (nod head “yes” but look confused)

Sly: What color is the color that you see? (Pippa pulls Millie aside)

Pippa: I don‟t see anything, do you?

Millie: Of course I do. Didn‟t you hear the weavers? Only the wisest in the kingdom can see the

special material. We were both born of royalty, so that‟s got to account for something.

Pippa: I‟m looking, but I just don‟t see it.

Millie: Look harder. Remember... wisdom! Do you see it now?

Pippa: Yes, of course. And it‟s beautiful! (walk back over)


Millie: Well... um... I see the color.....uh… uh... Pink? (Pause)


Millie: Yes, a loud, bright and brilliant pink.

Pippa: And I love how it fades into a soft pink at the end.

Millie: I can‟t wait to go back and tell everyone that I could see the cloth.

Pippa: (jealous) I saw it, too, Millie.

Millie: Yes you did, but that doesn‟t change the fact that I am the smartest princess in the

Kingdom.

Pippa: Actually, Millie, the smartest princess in the Kingdom is me. (2:00)

SONG 16 Me

Millie: Me - It‟s all about me

It‟s all about what I want and need to be

When I walk out the door and down the street I want the world to see

A wonderful, sweet and humble, kind adorable me

Pippa: Me - It‟s all about me - It‟s all about my sweet personality

So keep me happy, keep me pleasant so the whole wide world can see

A cute, little bubbly, caring, kind, affectionate me

Millie: I don‟t want much Pippa: My tastes are simple, yet refined


Millie: A dress to wear Pippa: That really makes me look divine

Millie: And new shoes made of velvet Pippa: And my hair all up in bows

Millie & Pippa: My needs are really basic - As anyone who knows

Millie: Me Pippa: I‟m talkin‟ „bout me

Millie: It‟s all about me Pippa: Just sweet, little me

Millie: It‟s all about what Pippa: What Millie: I Pippa: I

Millie & Pippa: Want and need to be

When I walk out the door and down the street I want the world to see

A wonderful, sweet and humble, kind adorable me

Millie: Wonderful me - Me - Me

Pippa: Marvelous me - Me - Me

Millie & Pippa: Sweet little me (2:00)

Guido: Well, you better get going. We still have lots of work to do, and I can‟t take another

song. Ta-ta. (Guido opens the door and Entertainment falls in)

Millie: Minister, wait ‟till you see the cloth. It‟s beautiful!

Pippa: It‟s more than beautiful, it‟s magnificent! (Millie and Pippa leave)

Guido: Well hello, hello, hello. Looks like we‟ve got ourselves a snooper.

Entertainment: (walks in and looks at the wrong spot) Look at how wonderful your work is.

Guido: Um, it‟s over here.

Entertainment: Of course. (reaches out to touch it)

Guido: Uh,uh,uh, we wouldn‟t want any fingerprints on this wonderful cloth. Please, come

close so that you can get a good look.


you are wise.


Entertainment: (nod head “yes” but look confused)

Sly: And, what color is the color that you see?

Entertainment: Why, I‟ve never seen a more beautiful shade of... uh... uh... uh...

Mind of Entertainment: (do not memorize. This will be pre-recorded) Nothing! I see nothing!

What is wrong with me? Cataracts, maybe? It does run in my family. No, that’s not it. I

must be a fool. But I can’t let anyone know. The King would fire me for sure.

Entertainment: I‟ve never seen a more beautiful shade of… white? (Pause)


Entertainment: Ah, yes, white. Perhaps I will write a song about it. Let‟s see.... Oh, lovely

cloth. Oh, lovely, lovely cloth. Oh, cloth. Oh lovely cloth. Lovely. Um, something like

that. I‟ll have to work on it a bit though... Good-bye! (Entertainment leaves. Weavers

laugh) (1:30)

The Emperor’s New Clothes 34 Section S Act 2


Sly: We‟re con men, drifters, sweet talking crooks




The Great Hall

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Section S

Entertainment: It was gorgeous, Your Majesty. And the shade of white they used, it was just

so… so…white.

King: I knew it! I knew it! I am pleased. In fact, I am so very pleased. (Millie and Pippa enter)

Millie: Mother, Father. We went to the weavers‟ room to see the cloth.

Queen: (say very slow) Were you both able to see it? (long pause as everyone leans in with a

nervous look on their faces. Millie and Pippa study their faces before answering)

Millie: Yes! (All let out a huge sigh of relief) It had such splendid designs and glorious colors.

Pippa: We‟ve never seen such beautiful shades of pink.

Queen: Of course you were able to see it. You were born of Royalty and hold extraordinary

greatness.

Gretchen: Your Majesty, we wanna go look at that their cloth.

Lindy-Loo: It‟d be spittin‟ good if we could see the fabric everyone‟s yappin‟ about.

Gretchen: It sounds better than a cow patty game toss on a hot summer day.

Lindy-Loo: Everyone else got to see it, ain‟t it our turn now?

Queen: But you are not wise. You‟re just... house cleaners. (All Court laughs)

Entertainment: The Queen is right. There‟s no way you two would be able to see the cloth.

Only the smartest can see it. That‟s what the weavers said.

Gretchen: Class is in session, folks. „Cause it‟s learnin‟ time. Bein‟ wise ain‟t just knowin‟

book stuff. It ain‟t just gettin‟ your calcalations and facts about history right.

Lindy-Loo: Bein‟ wise ain‟t just knowin‟ what to buy at the market when all you‟s gots is a

bunch of magic beans. It‟s about knowin‟ where to plant those magic beans. You followin‟

us?

Castle Court: (shake head no)

Gretchen: We might just be “house cleaners,” but there‟s a lot more upstairs than just the second

floor.

Lindy-Loo: Listen up, „cause we got sumin‟ to say.

(2:00)

The Emperor’s New Clothes 35 Section S Act 2

SONG 17 Down the Line

Gretchen: Our daddy was a worker for the local town pub

He met our mom when she stopped in to pick up some grub

They fell in love at first sight - Yeah, it was meant to be

She married him and he was put on our family tree

Lindy-Loo: Now mama was the happiest gal, it‟s true

Then the found out they were gonna have a baby real soon

First they had Gretchen here, and next came me

Then our other siblings, totaling 23.

Gretchen & Lindy-Loo: It‟s a long line of people that‟s made our family tree

We carry down this blood line of our spiffy family

Don‟t think there‟s not a smart one, „cause in our family lies

At least one that‟s got some brains - At least one that‟s wise

Gretchen: (talking) Ain‟t that right.

Lindy-Loo: (talking) Of course.

Gretchen: Our daddy‟s great-grandfather had an Uncle Ed

And Uncle Ed knew Betsy, a bright red-head

Betsy knew of Charlie that lived right down the way

And Charlie‟s neighbor, Big tall John, he married Aunt May.

Lindy-Loo: This just proves that somewhere someone had to have smarts

So we will see the cloth if we just look really hard

We might seem like dummies but we ain‟t and that‟s a fact

„Cause it‟s not brains that these two brilliant sisters lack

Gretchen & Lindy-Loo: It‟s a long line of people that‟s made our family tree

We carry down this blood line of our spiffy family

Don‟t think there‟s not a smart one, „cause in our family lies

At least one that‟s got some brains - At least one that‟s wise

Gretchen: Which one is the smart one?

Lindy-Loo: Which one is the smart one?

Gretchen & Lindy-Loo: I guess we know the smart one is you! And me! (2:00)

Entertainment: That made absolutely no sense at all. It only proves you have a very

dysfunctional family line.

Gretchen: That was a really big word and I have no idear what it meant. (look at King) Can we

go take a little peek at that their cloth now? It would make us happier than a junebug at a

porch light sale.

Lindy-Loo: We‟ll be there and back quicker than a barefoot jack rabbit on a hot, greasy griddle

in the middle of July. Just a tiny, little peek?

Castle Court: Start cleaning! (Gretchen and Lindy-Loo pout and start cleaning)

Gretchen: Let‟s go to the Weavers room and say we‟re there to “empty the trash.” That way,

we‟re doin‟ our duties for the King and seein‟ the cloth for ourselves.

Lindy-Loo: Sounds like a plan.

The Emperor’s New Clothes 36 Section T Act 2

Prince: Father, you really should go and see this so-called magical cloth these weavers are

weaving.

King: I haven‟t had time.

Prince: Mother, why don‟t you go see it?

Queen: There‟s no reason to. Many of the Ministers have already gone to see their work and

they‟ve reported that the cloth is beautiful. Even your sister‟s saw the cloth and said it was

outstanding.

Prince: Well then, I guess I‟ll stop in for a visit myself. (1:00)




The Weavers’ Room --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Section T

(Knock at the door. Guido looks through the peep hole)

Luichi: Who is it this time?

Sly: They just won‟t leave us alone. Don‟t they know we‟re busy?

Guido: It‟s the two maids. We gotta be careful with those girls. Them being so dumb might

make them just smart enough to figure us out. (say to Maids) Whataya need? We‟re busy.

Gretchen: We need your trash.

Guido: Sly, they need you. (Luichi let’s out a small snicker)

Sly: Very funny.

Guido: We don‟t have any.

Gretchen: You ain‟t got no trash?

Guido: Nope.

Lindy-Loo: What about dirty dishes. You got any of those?

Guido: Nope.

Lindy-Loo: Dirty clothes?

Guido: Nope.

Gretchen: Is anything in there dirty that might need some cleanin‟?

Guido: Nope.

Gretchen: Can we just come in?

Guido: Nope.

Lindy-Loo: Is that the only word you know how to say?

Guido: Nope. But it‟s the only word I‟m gonna say to you.

Gretchen: You know, you‟re not a very nice person.

The Emperor’s New Clothes 37 Section U Act 2

Lindy-Loo: Let‟s go. Ain‟t no reason to waste time on them. (Gretchen and Lindy-Loo leave.

Guido walks away from the door)

Guido: That was easy. (Another knock at the door) Look, we have nothing in here that you

need. So please leave us alone.

Prince: That‟s funny, because I was told you have a magical suit of clothes for my father in

there.

Weavers: (surprised and nervous) It‟s the Prince.

Luichi: What do we do, Guido? He‟ll catch us for sure. He‟ll see there‟s nothin‟ there and we‟ll

be exposed for the wretched and despicable people we really are. (Knock on door again)

Prince: Hello? I would like to come in and see the cloth.

Sly: He wants to see the cloth. He wants to see the cloth! (Knock on door again)

Luichi: We‟ll never be able to convince him that there‟s something on that loom. He‟s way too

smart.

Sly: And he hates us. (Knock on door again)

Prince: I need you to open the door, please.

Guido: Coming.

Luichi & Sly: What?

Guido: Look tired and overworked. (opens the door) Hello, Prince. How can we help you?

Prince: I‟ve come to see the magical outfit.

Guido: I wish we could show it to you, but the Maids just took it. They wanted to have it

pressed before the big procession. We offered to do it ourselves but they insisted. I think

they saw how warn out we are from working so much.

Luichi: (whining to self) My fingers. They hurt so bad. (keep whining)

Sly: (whining to self) My arms and my elbows. The pain is real. (keep whining)

Prince: Very well. I shall see the three of you at the fitting.

Guido: Of course, Your Highness.

Luichi: That was brilliant!

Sly: You are the best con man ever!

Guido: I know. (2:30)


Guido, Luichi & Sly: We‟re con men, drifters, sweet talkin‟ crooks




The Great Hall

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Section U


SONG 18 Beautiful Cloth

Entertainment: Have you heard about the King

He did the most peculiar thing

The new suit he‟s commissioning from weavers, so it goes

The suit is magic, so they say - Invisible in every way

To those not wise enough to see the magic suit of clothes

The cloth is light and delicate - The patterns are most elegant

The colors are exciting - There the best that you can find

The weave is extraordinary - Strong and firm, yet light and airy

All you can imagine through the pictures in your mind

Castle Court: The cloth is light and delicate - The patterns are most elegant

The colors are exciting - There the best that you can find

The weave is extraordinary - Strong and firm, yet light and airy

All you can imagine through the pictures in your mind

The pictures in your mind (1:30)

Queen: Court Herald, have all the ministers come here at once. Then go to the weavers and tell

them the procession will start soon and they must fit the King in his outfit immediately.

(Horn)

Court Herald: Calling all ministers. Please report to the Emperor at once. (Court Herald leaves

stage as ministers come)

Queen: The procession is just a few hours away. Let‟s make sure everything is ready. (.30)

SONG 19 Preparations for the Procession

Queen: (sing to Princesses)

The great procession for your Father – Is almost here - He will be the best dressed

It must be perfect and full of color – I want it flawless ‘cause he deserves the best

(sing to Minister of Entertainment)

We must have music playing loudly - So loud that everyone can hear

We must have trumpets and Ukeleles - So they can dance and sing and clap and cheer

(sing to everyone)

Set the seats, set the stage, set the mood - Everything needs to look grand

If we take our time and do it right this will be - The best procession in the land

(sing to Minister of Commerce)

Check the budget, re-run the numbers - How much money have we spent so far?

Can we afford to go a little over - We still need cakes and pies and so much more

(sing to Minister of Fashion and Style)

We need outfits for all the workers - They must look good and fit the part

You are the tailors, put it together - Make sure you’re ready when the big event starts


(sing to everyone)

Set the seats, set the stage, set the mood - Everything needs to look grand

If we take our time and do it right this will be - The best procession in the land

The best procession in the land (2:30)

(Horn)

Court Herald: Presenting the three weavers with the King‟s magical suit.

Guido: Your Majesty, we‟ve just finished your magical outfit. Sorry we‟ve taken so long, but

we wanted it to be perfect. Please, come close so that you can get a good look.


you are wise.


King: (nod head “yes” but look confused)

Sly: And what color is the color that you see?

King: Why, I‟ve never seen a more beautiful blend of... uh… uh... uh....

Mind of King: (do not memorize. This will be pre-recorded) I don’t see anything. Does this mean

that I am unfit for my office? Or just stupid? It can’t be. I am the Emperor. I am wise! Or, at

least, I thought I was wise. Wait a minute. What was that? A twinkle? Diamonds! Yes,

diamonds! They used diamonds to make my outfit! Oh, yes! I see it! I see it!

King: I‟ve never seen a more beautiful blend of diamonds, rubies and emeralds. I love it! I love

it! I love it! What do you think, my Queen?

Queen: (Doesn’t move, staring at the invisible cloth)

King: She‟s at a loss for words. How sweet.

Guido: Sire, let‟s make sure this outfit fits you perfectly. (They go behind the changing screen)

King: Put in on. Not too tight. There you go. Easy with my magical suit! It‟s so delicate.

Sly: Trust me, it‟s a lot more durable than you think.

Guido: I must say, our work is impeccable.

Luichi: This looks fantastic on you.

Sly: The whole suit is as light as a cobweb. (All three snicker)

King: I think I see a cross stitch.

Sly: Nope! That‟s a mosquito. (make slapping sound)

King: Ow!

Sly: Got it! (2:00)

SONG 20 A Fitting Song

Fashion: They‟re fitting the King, which is fitting, indeed

For a King should be fit as a fiddle

The sleeves must be long enough, trousers without a cuff

Leave some room for his middle

The Emperor’s New Clothes 40 Section V Act 2

Solo 1: The King is in changing, his clothes rearranging

To change to a style that‟s more suitable

He found a new fashion which now is his passion

A truth that we find irrefutable

They say that only the wise can see for the magic suit is invisible

I hope that I have the wisdom in me - If I don‟t, I know I‟ll be miserable

Solo 2: And so it begins at a quarter past ten - A parade of the King and his nobles

The new suit he‟s wearing are beyond all comparing

That‟s what I‟ve been told and it‟s quotable

Castle Court: The new suit he‟s wearing are beyond all comparing

That‟s what I‟ve been told and it‟s quotable (1:00)

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Section V

King: Ah, yes. It feels so lovely. It‟s light...and, and delicate...and light. In fact, it‟s a bit drafty.

Guido: Your Majesty, we‟re going to go into town and make sure everyone remembers to be

there this evening for the procession. We don‟t anyone to miss this fantastic moment. See

you there!

King: Yes, that‟s a wonderful idea. A wonderful idea, indeed. (The weavers leave. Horn)

Court Herald: Presenting the King in his new magical suit of the finest cloth.

(Everyone is in shock)

King: Well? Clap! (Everyone claps slowly) What do you think, my dear?

Queen: Why, you look…you look…Oh! (Faint)

Gretchen: I gotta say, stupidity ain‟t a virus, but it sure is spreadin‟ like one! I know y‟all can

see that the Emperor ain‟t got no clothes on! (Everyone gasps and gets very quiet)

King: What did you just say?

Gretchen: As much as I respect you as my Emperor, I really have no desire to see you in your

undies.

King: What about you? Do you like my royal clothes?

Lindy-Loo: What royal clothes? My sister‟s right, you ain‟t wearin‟ squat. Man, I‟m gonna have

nightmares tonight.

Gretchen: A magic suit of clothes. Whoever heard of such nonsense? That magic suit of clothes

is everything but.

Lindy-Loo: I do like the little hearts on your underroos. They‟re kinda sweet. (all start

whispering to each other)

Mind of King: (do not memorize. This will be pre-recorded) No magic clothes? Me, in my

underwear? Could this be? Have I been tricked? Bamboozled? Conned? Ripped off?

Hornswoggled? Deceived? Mislead? Outwitted? Set up? Swindled? Double-crossed?

Victimized? Duped? And hood-winked? Oh no! It’s true! I’ve been flim-flammed! Which

means... I’m standing in front of everyone in nothing but my underwear! (Gets embarrassed

and tries to cover himself with his hands)

King: So, none of you see the magic cloth? (All shake heads no) And, I‟ve been standing here in

my underwear this entire time? (All nod heads yes) I knew I felt a draft.

Fashion: Here you are, Your Highness. This is a robe we made for you earlier today.

The Emperor’s New Clothes 41 Section V Act 2

Style: You‟ll look wonderful in it, and, it will be perfect for your Royal Procession this evening.

Fashion: Those swindlers might have taken our money, but they‟ve taught us all an important

lesson. We see now, that our values were all mixed up, so our Kingdom was all mixed up.

King: I realize, now, that it‟s not the clothes on a person‟s back that are important, but what‟s

inside a person that counts. And that will be my highest priority from this day forward.

Queen: I guess, even an Emperor and his court can be wrong sometimes. It takes a brave man to

admit when he‟s wrong.

Entertainment: From now on, we shall take care of our people in the castle as well as the

people in our village.

Prince: This is how a Kingdom survives.

Castle Court: Hip, hip, hurray! Hip, hip, hurray!

Millie: I‟m sorry for always being mean to you, Princess Pippa.

Pippa: I know you‟re sorry. And you should be. You‟re an awful person, Princess Millie. And

when I get older, I will take the crown from you and rule the Kingdom. So watch your back!

(Pippa stomps away)

Commerce: But what about our budget? According to my calculations, we gave the weavers

everything. Which means, we now have… nothing. (all whisper and act concerned)

Gretchen: Not so fast, Minister. You see, earlier today Lindy-Loo and I snuck in the kitchen

and put a few drops of liquid laxatives in their drinks, you know, for constipation.

Lindy-Loo: They were in the bathroom forever. So… while they were in the john, we snuck in

their room and saw there wasn‟t nothin‟ on that loom. So we emptied everything they had

in our own bags, then filled theirs back up with rocks and all the trash from the palace.

Gretchen: We knew they were no good when they refused to let us in to see that cloth. They

knew we were way too smart to be fooled by all that hogwash.

Lindy-Loo: We knew there weren‟t no supernatural magic goin‟ on. Told y‟all we got brains,

and we know how to use „em. (Gretchen & Lindy-loo snicker, high five, then dance and hum

the Ghostbusters theme again)

King: I never would have guessed it would have been those two to save the day.

Queen: I think it‟s time for that raise they‟ve been asking for. (all talk with each other laughing

and smiling) (5:00)

THE END!

the emperor's new clothes - act 2 - ccptheatre.com · millie & pippa: (with mirrors) look...

Documents