the essential stress survival guide
DESCRIPTION
An interactive 1/2 day seminar on Surviving stress. What is Stress? What are its effects? What are the differences between men and women? How do you manage/ Reduce/ Eliminazte stress?TRANSCRIPT
Mark SuttonMark SuttonLife-Coach. Life Without Limits.
(http://www.life-without-limits.co)
Facebook Page: Life Without Limits
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Start With The End In MindStart With The End In MindInteractive introduction to Stress
and Stress management. Raise Awareness.
Definition, Response, Symptoms.Men versus Women. Common sources of Stress.Perceptions, Thoughts and Stress. Beliefs, Values and Roles.Managing and Reducing Stress.
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Defining StressDefining StressMost accepted Definition: “Stress is a condition or feeling experienced when a person perceives that demands exceed the personal and social resources the individual is able to mobilize.”
Is Stress all bad?Good Stress: Challenges and threats
Bad stress: Too much Acute stress/ Episodic Acute Stress. Chronic Stress. 90% of all doctors visits are stress related
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The Stress ResponseThe Stress ResponseHardwired Evolutionary Response. Flight or
Fight.
Stress Hormones: Cortisol and Adrenaline.
Any perceived threat to our comfort/wellbeing.www.life-without-limits.co
Signs and SymptomsSigns and SymptomsPhysical Behavioural
Raised cholesterol: Heart disease.
High Blood pressure: Strokes. Headache, Nausea, Dizziness. Asthma, Skin Problems. Muscular pain (lower back),
Clenched Jaws, Grinding Teeth.
Tight or Dry throat, Pounding heart, Increased Perspiration.
Appetite change: Weight Loss or Gain, Diabetes
Indigestion, Stomach Cramps, Peptic ulcer, Constipation, Diarrhoea.
Sleep disturbance: Fatigue
Depression, Mood swings
Withdrawal, Isolation, Loss of Interest in Self.
Negative feelings.Easily Irritated/
Angered .De-motivation.Difficulty Concentrating
or Thinking.Diminished/Increased
Sex Drive.Increase in Smoking
and use of Alcohol or drugs.
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Men V WomenMen V WomenGreatest Stressor: Relationship loss in Women, Performance failure in Men. (Self-Esteem).
Women: Oxytocin (calming). Tend and Befriend.
Men: No Oxytocin, bottling feelings and emotions and withdrawal and closing off.
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Signs and SymptomsSigns and Symptoms
Exercise: Signs of Stress.Not a medical questionnaire.Add up the number of “a” answers.It is an indication of areas where stress
management techniques may be useful.
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Lifestyle StressLifestyle StressAreas in Life where Stress Occurs.
Workplace Stress.Relationship Stress: Family/ Friends.Relationship Stress: Intimate .Financial Stress.Personality Trait Stress.
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Stress ManagementStress ManagementChanging your response:Attitudes and Behaviours.Increasing awareness.Immediate Effects:Staying Calm.Talk it out.Escape.Managing Current Stress:Communication , Conflict Resolution.Work /Life Balance, Peer Support.Planning and Organising .Time and workload management. Relaxation, Health, Lifestyle.
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PerceptionPerceptionIs Stress Internal or External?Stress is most commonly internal: Perception
Perception based on thoughts.Values/Beliefs/Attitude/Life Experience.Roles.Relationships and responsibilities.
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Beliefs, Values and Roles.Beliefs, Values and Roles.Beliefs connect us to the world
(Ideological).Values derived from Beliefs (Societal).Roles: Relationships and
Responsibilities.Which is more important? Values
dictating your Roles, or Roles dictating your values.
“Your beliefs beget your values which beget your roles”
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ExerciseExercisePrioritise your Values on the values wheel.
List and Prioritise your Roles.Do you bring your values into your roles?Is this a source of Stress?What do you need to do to match the value
and role?What action are you going to undertake to do
this?What could stop you doing it?When are you going to do it?
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Feelings and EmotionsFeelings and EmotionsBoth sensations experienced.Feelings: external stimuli, Emotions:
from the mind.Feelings :physical sensations and
mental states (reaction to a thought).Feelings: Often temporary, subside
once the stimulus is no longer present. Emotions Long term: Years.
False Evidence Appearing Real
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Emotional IntelligenceEmotional IntelligenceAware of your emotions: In control
of them, rather than controlling you.
Its the ability to recognise and manage your feelings and those of others.
Daniel Goldman:IQ 20% success work. 1% in life.The rest is Emotional Intelligence and
environment.
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Emotional IntelligenceEmotional Intelligence
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1. Self Awareness – emotional self awareness, accurate self assessment, self confidence
2. Relationship Management –
inspirational leadership, influence, developing others, change catalyst, conflict management, building bonds, teamwork and collaboration
3. Self Management – emotional self
control, transparency, adaptability, achievement, initiative, optimism
4. Social Awareness – empathy,
organizational awareness, service
Changing Your ThinkingChanging Your Thinking
Responsible for own feelings and change your Perceptions
60,000 thoughts/day, 85% repeated, 45% Negative – old habits
New thinking requires awareness of the old thinking!
Self-Perception is Key – Always have Choice!
Listen to your self talk
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The Scoping processThe Scoping processStep 1: FAST FREEZING.Step 2: OBSERVING AND NOTICING.Step 3: RECORDING.Step 4: INTERRUPTING.Step 5: CHOOSING.Step 6: NOTICING.Step 7: LEARNING.
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ExerciseExercise Call To Mind a Stressful experience:Write down
The facts of the situation or event. What you were thinking. What you were feeling. The physical symptoms you experienced. Write down what you would do differently.
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AttitudeAttitudeOur way of approaching life and is how we express our thoughts and feelings.
The one thing we can change about ourselves.
Its when things go wrong that we gain a clear picture of the type of attitude we have.
Success in life is 85% attitude and 15% Aptitude (Harvard Study)
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Benefits of OptimismBenefits of OptimismHealthier.Greater Achievement.Persistence.Emotional Health.Increased Longevity.Less Stress.
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Stress and ChangeStress and ChangeFear of change: Failure and
Success, Unknown.The 4 C’s: Comfort
(passive),Challenge (active), Creative (active), Content (Passive)
Change is a threat= StressChinese 2 symbols for Crisis:
Danger. Opportunity.
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Managing ChangeManaging ChangeHealthy Lifestyle/ Know yourself.Identify, Accept and be Open.Deal with what you can now, Be
patient.Make room/ Practice Flexibility.Anticipate change – plan adequately.See the big picture.Grieve.Seek advice from others.Learn what’s offered from change.
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Work/Life BalanceWork/Life BalanceWork/Life Balance exercise.
Select one area that the answer was true or pretty true.What answer would you like to have (if
any)?List what action(s) you are going to
undertake to do this?What could stop you doing it?When are you going to do it?How will you know it has been completed?
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CommunicationCommunicationWhy Is effective communication important?
When is Communication Effective?Relationship between sender and receiver
good.Clear objectives.Few distractions.Good sending and receiving.Eye contact .Speech is clear.
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CommunicationCommunicationSending Skills:
7% Words.38% Tone of Voice.55% Body language.
Sending Skills:What, When, Where and How (Tone, Strength,
Pitch, Speed).Use appropriate words, be clear, concise and
simple.Use eye contact and be aware of your facial
expressions.Be aware of your body language.
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CommunicationCommunicationIs Talking or Listening more Important?
Seek first to understand.We are far more likely to get others to listen if we listen
fully to their viewpoint.Exercise: What type of listener are you?To do’s.
Put the talker at ease.Limit your own talk/be patient/don’t interrupt.Remove distractions be attentive and Focused.Be non-judgemental, sincere and genuine.Be aware of body language.
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Manage and Eliminate Manage and Eliminate StressStress
Effective Communication/ Conflict ResolutionAssertive Communication.Listening. Give in Occasionally.Take one Thing at a time.Go Easy with Criticism.Respond to criticism with empathy.Make yourself available.Take a time out.
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Manage and Eliminate StressManage and Eliminate StressEffective strategies for handling Conflict.Stay focused on current conflict.Try to see their point of view.Take responsibility for what’s yours.Use “I” messages.Look for Compromise/ Solution.Don’t give up.Ask for help if you need it.Get in touch with your feelings.Know when its not working.
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How to manage and How to manage and Eliminate stressEliminate stress
Time ManagementGoal Setting.Planning.Prioritising.Organising.Take one Thing at a time .
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Time ManagementTime ManagementPlanning
On course to achieving goals and objectives.Planning is the difference between being
REACTIVE and PROACTIVE. Set priorities.Reduce stress.1 minute planning, gain 10 in execution.
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Time ManagementTime ManagementDaily Planning
Plan your day the night before
Make a list of “Have To” do and “Want to” do.
Execute the most important task in the first 90 minutes of the workday.
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Time ManagementTime ManagementPrioritise using the ABCDE System.A) Very important, must be done or face serious
consequences. (subcategories A1, A2, A3 etc.).B) Tasks you should do, failure gives minor
consequences. Finish A Tasks first.C) Something that would be Nice to do. No
consequences if you should fail.D) Delegate as much as you can so you can
concentrate on all the A tasks.E) Eliminate, it makes no difference if this task is
ever done.www.life-without-limits.co
Manage and Eliminate Manage and Eliminate Stress.Stress.
Handle your WorkloadCommitments within limits and review.Don’t overpromise.Vary your work routine.Take breaks.Set limits.Shun the superman urge.
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Manage and Eliminate Manage and Eliminate StressStress
Peer supportSocial Group.Circle of Friends.Cultivating a
Network.www.menssheds.ie
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Manage and Eliminate Manage and Eliminate StressStress
Staying HealthyDiet.Exercise
regularly.Sleep.Sex.Relaxation.
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RelaxationRelaxationEffects
Safety valveStress reducerRelieves fatigue Promotes sleepAllows us to be calmerGives us time for ourselves
Four characteristics common to all effective Relaxation techniques.Quiet environment, passive attitude, comfortable
position, constant stimulus.www.life-without-limits.co
The Two Minute Stress The Two Minute Stress BusterBuster
Deep Breathing:Calms. Relaxes.Present.
Guided exercise:
www.fragrantheart.com
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SummarySummaryStress is a Hardwired evolutionary response.Chronic stress is a major factor contributing
to illness.Stress is internal and based on perceptions.Stress occurs in all aspects of life and can be
personality related.Stress management involves:
Dealing with the feeling immediately, staying present.
Managing and reducing stress by changing to a healthy, balanced lifestyle, Planning and effective Communication and conflict resolution skills.
Changing attitudes and behaviours that cause stress Increasing awareness and your response to stressors
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