THE GOSSIPERTHE GOSSIPERTHE SLANDERER THE SLANDERER

THE BUSYBODYTHE BUSYBODYTHE WHISPERERTHE WHISPERER

“Whoever guards his mouth and tongue keeps his soul from troubles”

(Proverbs 21:23)

GOSSIP’S RELATIVES:GOSSIP’S RELATIVES:

“And besides they learn to be idle, wandering about from house to house, and not only idle but also gossips and busybodies, saying things which they ought not. Therefore I desire the younger widows marry, bear children, manage the house, give no opportunity to the adversary to speak reproachfully. For some have already turned aside after Satan” (1 Timothy 5:13-15)

“free from labour, at leisure; lazy, shunning the labour which one ought to perform” (Strong’s #692)

“busy about trifles and neglect-ful of important matters, esp. busy about other folks' affairs, a busybody” (Strong’s #4021)

How the Sin Manifests Itself

“And besides they learn to be idle, wandering about from house to house, and not only idle but also gossips and busybodies, saying things which they ought not. Therefore I desire the younger widows marry, bear children, manage the house, give no opportunity to the adversary to speak reproachfully. For some have already turned aside after Satan” (1 Timothy 5:13-15)

saying things which theyought not.

There are some things that are just not right to say!

GOSSIPING

“IDLE CHATTER”

GossipGossipGossip & whispering…

Not constructive in purpose, but destructive

Not for correction, but for idle discussion

No power to help, but only to hurt

The Source of the Sin:

“And besides they learn to be idle, wandering about from house to house, and not only idle but also gossips and busybodies, saying things which they ought not. Therefore I desire the younger widows marry, bear children, manage the house, give no opportunity to the adversary to speak reproachfully. For some have already turned aside after Satan” (1 Timothy 5:13-15)For some have already turned aside after Satan

The Tactics of the SinThe Tactics of the Sin

the disclaimer tacticthe disclaimer tactic::

“I don’t mean to gossip, but. . .”“I don’t mean to gossip, but. . .” know they are saying things they ought notknow they are saying things they ought not ““disclaimers” do not permit the practicedisclaimers” do not permit the practice what about: “I don’t mean to kill, but. . .”?what about: “I don’t mean to kill, but. . .”?

The Tactics of the SinThe Tactics of the Sin

the secret tactic:the secret tactic: ““don’t tell anyone, but did you know that don’t tell anyone, but did you know that

so and so is. . .”so and so is. . .” ““All that hate me whisper together against All that hate me whisper together against

me; against me do they devise my hurt. me; against me do they devise my hurt. ‘An evil disease,’ they say, ‘clings to him. ‘An evil disease,’ they say, ‘clings to him. And now that he lies down, he will rise up And now that he lies down, he will rise up no more’”no more’” (Psalm 41:7, 8) (Psalm 41:7, 8)

The Tactics of the Sin:The Tactics of the Sin:

the flattery finish: the flattery finish: ““So and so is a really energetic preacher, but good So and so is a really energetic preacher, but good

speakers know their audience better. . .but his speakers know their audience better. . .but his sermons are so basic. . .an older preacher would be sermons are so basic. . .an older preacher would be wiser. . .”wiser. . .”

““So and so is a really wise preacher, to bad he is not So and so is a really wise preacher, to bad he is not younger so he could reach the youth. . .if he would younger so he could reach the youth. . .if he would sleep more he would be more effective. . .”sleep more he would be more effective. . .”

““They speak idly everyone with his neighbor; with They speak idly everyone with his neighbor; with flattering lips and a double heart they speak. May the flattering lips and a double heart they speak. May the Lord cut off all flattering lips, and the tongue that Lord cut off all flattering lips, and the tongue that speaks proud things” speaks proud things” (Ps. 12:2, 3)(Ps. 12:2, 3)

The Tactics of the SinThe Tactics of the Sin

the blaspheme & blessthe blaspheme & bless approach: approach: say anything about anyone and end with “bless her/his say anything about anyone and end with “bless her/his

heart”heart” ““so and so is so windy that someone should package him so and so is so windy that someone should package him

up and sell him as a passenger side airbag. . .bless his up and sell him as a passenger side airbag. . .bless his heart; he gives ‘moving sermons.’ Long before he is heart; he gives ‘moving sermons.’ Long before he is finished everyone wants to ‘move on out of the building’. . finished everyone wants to ‘move on out of the building’. . .bless his heart”.bless his heart”

“Out of the same mouth proceed blessing and cursing. My brethren,

these things ought not be so” James 3:10

The Tactics of the SinThe Tactics of the Sin

the direct slanderous the direct slanderous approachapproach::““So and so is more interested in sports So and so is more interested in sports

than spirituality”than spirituality”he will tell everyone, but the one he is he will tell everyone, but the one he is

talking abouttalking aboutfeels good to condemn others while feels good to condemn others while

elevating one’s own ego and ability to judgeelevating one’s own ego and ability to judge

The Effects of the SinThe Effects of the Sin

1.1. wounds otherswounds others , , “All that hate me whisper “All that hate me whisper together against me; against me do they devise together against me; against me do they devise my hurt my hurt (Ps. 41:7)(Ps. 41:7)

2.2. separates friendsseparates friends, , “He who covers a “He who covers a transgression seeks love, but he who repeats a transgression seeks love, but he who repeats a matter separates friends” matter separates friends” (Prov. 17:9)(Prov. 17:9)

a)a) Some transgressions need not be known to others; Some transgressions need not be known to others; especially if repented ofespecially if repented of

b)b) Some will repeat a matter for the purpose of driving a Some will repeat a matter for the purpose of driving a wedge between friends, wedge between friends, “. . .a whisperer separates the “. . .a whisperer separates the best of friends”best of friends” (Prov. 16:28) (Prov. 16:28)

The Effects of the Sin

3.3. sows strifesows strife, , “An ungodly man digs up evil, “An ungodly man digs up evil, and it is on his lips like a burning fire. A and it is on his lips like a burning fire. A perverse man sows strife, and a whisperer perverse man sows strife, and a whisperer separates the best of friends”separates the best of friends” (Prov. 16:27, (Prov. 16:27, 28)28)

digs up evil to trappeople, his motive is to sow strife

His actions are sinful because his motive is

Was among the sins that plagued Corinth (2 Cor. 12:20)

“lips like a burning fire” (Prov. 16:27)

Walton Weaver:Walton Weaver:

““The shame is that his lips burn with a The shame is that his lips burn with a message of gossip. He does not have to message of gossip. He does not have to know that his message is true. He will say know that his message is true. He will say it anyway. If one ever gets at odds with “a it anyway. If one ever gets at odds with “a worthless man” or an unprincipled person, worthless man” or an unprincipled person, he can expect hurt and much mischief he can expect hurt and much mischief ahead”ahead”

““What the Gossiper Does” Truth Mag., August 15, 2002. p. 11 (491)What the Gossiper Does” Truth Mag., August 15, 2002. p. 11 (491)

The Effects of the SinThe Effects of the Sin

4.4. seeks eager listeners, gets a circle of seeks eager listeners, gets a circle of gossipersgossipers

a)a) attracts other evildoers, attracts other evildoers, “An evildoer “An evildoer gives heed to false lips; a liar listens gives heed to false lips; a liar listens eagerly to a spiteful tongue”eagerly to a spiteful tongue” (Prov. (Prov. 17:4; cf. 18:8)17:4; cf. 18:8)

b)b) many many “. . .spent their time in nothing “. . .spent their time in nothing else but either to tell or to hear some else but either to tell or to hear some new thing”new thing” (Acts 17:21) (Acts 17:21)

The Effects of the Sin:The Effects of the Sin:

5.5. finds no goodfinds no good, , “He who has a deceitful “He who has a deceitful heart finds no good, and he who has a heart finds no good, and he who has a perverse tongue falls into evil”perverse tongue falls into evil” (Prov. 17:20)(Prov. 17:20)

a)a) Cannot find anything pleasantCannot find anything pleasant

b)b) falls into evil, since he cannot find falls into evil, since he cannot find anything good, he will end up in what anything good, he will end up in what he seeks after—evil!he seeks after—evil!

The Effects of the Sin:The Effects of the Sin:

6.6. destroys own souldestroys own soul, , “A fool’s mouth is his “A fool’s mouth is his destruction, and his lips are the snare of his soul”destruction, and his lips are the snare of his soul” (Prov. 18:6)(Prov. 18:6)

““But I say to you that for every idle word men But I say to you that for every idle word men may speak, they will give account of it in the may speak, they will give account of it in the day of judgment. For by your words you will be day of judgment. For by your words you will be justified, and by your words you will be justified, and by your words you will be condemned”condemned” (Matt. 12:36, 37) (Matt. 12:36, 37)

The Solution to the SinThe Solution to the Sin

“Set a guard, O Lord, over my mouth; keep watch

over the door of my lips”

(Psalm 141:3)

do not associate with a gossipdo not associate with a gossip –Proverbs 20:19 –Proverbs 20:19

quick to hear, slow to speak –James 1:19quick to hear, slow to speak –James 1:19put away lying –Ephesians 4:25put away lying –Ephesians 4:25replace corrupt words with truth and edifying replace corrupt words with truth and edifying

speech –Ephesians 4:25, 29speech –Ephesians 4:25, 29speech seasoned with grace–Colossians 4:6speech seasoned with grace–Colossians 4:6

The Solution to the SinThe Solution to the Sin

Gossip vs. CounselGossip vs. Counsel

Is There A Conflict Between...

Is There A Conflict Between...

AvoidingGossip

Using WiseCounsel&

The difference between gossip and a concerned friend is like the

difference between a butcher and a surgeon: both cut meat but for

different reasons!

Using Wise Counsel CommendedUsing Wise Counsel Commended(Proverbs 11:14; 13:10; 24:6)

Using wise counsel… constructive in purpose, not destructive for avoiding wrong, not for idle discussion power to help & avoid further harm

“For it has been declared to me concerning you, my brethren, by those of Chloe’s household, that there are contentions among you” (1 Cor. 1:11)

“For it has been declared to me concerning you, my brethren, by those of Chloe’s household, that

there are contentions among you” (1 Cor. 1:11; cf. 11:18)

• Paul speaks in an approved fashion of Ms. Chloe’s household

• Chloe’s household reported the error that was going on that Paul might address

• No hint of malice on her part• No fear of having her name affixed to the

declaration

Wise Action Involves Noting Presence of Sin

Wise Action Involves Noting Presence of Sin

Deut. 13:12-18 Dealing with sin keep an open ear; inquire, search out, ask diligently;

strike it Gal. 2:11-14 Open rebuke of Peter 1 Tim. 5:17-21 Open rebuke of sinful man Eph. 5:7-11 Duty of all Christians

Bible does not condemn the exposure of sin as “gossip,” “slander,” “busybody,” or as causing “strife,” etc.

Counsel of God Led Nathan to Expose the Sin of David

Counsel of God Led Nathan to Expose the Sin of David

No one can improve on the divine counsel of how to deal with sin (2 Sam. 12)

David’s sin exposed not only in front of Nathan, but all of Israel All who can read 2 SamuelProbably would have been written in The

Book of Nathan the Prophet(1 Chron. 29:29)

Nathan’s Rebuke of David’s SinNathan’s Rebuke of David’s Sin Humiliation/shame was severe & public (2 Sam.

12:11, 12) Caused David to humble self & truly repent

We have certain psalms as a result showing how one in sin gives heart to God (Psa. 32 & 51)

Didn’t despise Nathan for pointing out sin Didn’t despise Samuel or God for writing it in the Bible Simply humbled himself and reached for reconciliation

with God; aspired a better life (Ps. 51:1-15)

Wise Action Involves Rejecting Those Who Remain In It

Titus 3:10, 11:Titus 3:10, 11:

““Reject a divisive man after the first and Reject a divisive man after the first and second admonition, knowing that such a second admonition, knowing that such a person is warped and sinning, being self-person is warped and sinning, being self-condemned”condemned”

“avert by entreaty or seek to avert, to deprecate. . .refuse, decline, shun, avoid” (Strong’s #3868)

“. . .schismatic, factious, a follower of a false doctrine. . .” (Strong’s #141)

Rejecting Divisive Men

Titus 3:10, 11:Titus 3:10, 11:

““Reject a divisive man after the first and Reject a divisive man after the first and second admonition, knowing that such a second admonition, knowing that such a person is warped and sinning, being self-person is warped and sinning, being self-condemned”condemned”

Give Time For

Repentance &

Correction

Must Make Judgments On

DisciplineJude 22, 23:

“And on some have compassion, making a distinction; but others save with fear, pulling them out of the fire, hating even the garment defiled by the flesh” (Jude 22, 23)

Judge whether Judge whether it is a personal it is a personal and private sin and private sin “against you” “against you” (Matt. 18:15)(Matt. 18:15)

Judge whether Judge whether it is a sin it is a sin against other against other brethren brethren (Gal. 2:11, 12)(Gal. 2:11, 12)

Does it require one or Does it require one or more of the following:more of the following: o a gentle word of

exhortation?o a warning (public or private:

Phil. 4:2; 1 Thess. 5:14)o a stern rebuke (Acts 8:20-

22)o a public refutation (1 Tim.

5:20; Gal. 2:14)o a marking (Rom. 16:17)o congregational

chastisement (1 Cor. 5:4)