the man with confused eyes

8/14/2019 The Man With Confused Eyes

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The Man With Confused Eyes


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2006 TOTIC Texts

ISBN # 978-1-4116-8208-5


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"I don't believe in the Book of the Law" - C.J.


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Introduction

Personal ramblings, musings, and mumblings. Those words possiblydescribe this present work. I've found, during the writing of this text thatan intimate approach is beneficial, and makes for some inspired reading.

Not that I'm one to toot my own horn, but indeed, that is what this

"Author's Note" is for. Herein, what is now affectionately termed by

myself as "T.M.W.C.E.", you will discover some heavy topics.

Whimsical artifice may show itself also. But, what is it all in total? I

don't really know, to be quite honest. The sum of all the parts are

certainly large, as the whole is just a slim paperback tome. All kiddingaside, this book is part of an evolution rather than a proposed, televised

revolution (although that would be nice also). Reading some of what is

here may lead you all to believe that I'm either candid, or crazy, or both.

Recent events, and I mean some global fucking recent events, have come

up and distorted my view a bit of my own world, as it does to any human

with cable t.v. and/or the internet. We're all as experienced as the next

guy, if you believe anything Ouspensky said. Dream on and you won't

be disappointed. Wake up and you'll die a slow death. The facade and

charade of life on this rock sets some free as quickly as walking in front

of a speeding bus. Maybe that will be the title of my next book. ---

Randall Pike 2006


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New Political Farce (A More Than One

Sided Magickal Dialogue)

Power begets downfall. It is ever apparent that a demise is much morecommon and entertaining than a long, prosperous reign. A fall from

grace need not be quick or slow. It's the classic misery of the situation

that amuses the masses. Popular culture's view and definition of despair

changes and progresses rapidly throughout the minutes, so we must

constantly upgrade our notion of just what pain is. Pain, for all intents

and purposes, is transcendental. Pain purifies. In the face of extreme

evil, pain may wash one's slate clean, to start again. Although we may

begin anew, our position upon the totem pole is dramatically lower, yet

our dignity is replenished, albeit slowly. So, in essence, we lose our

grace all over again while kissing those asses which we spat upon in an

earlier incarnation. Welcome to the world of politics. Fuck dignity, I say.

If we are to celebrate talent, courage, and genius via corrupt and

unworthy vessels, we do a disservice to our own roles within popular

eugenics. Society today is doomed to utter failure simply by pure

mediocrity, thus ending any occult geek's (my) hope of a Satanic raceruling the universe. The demise begins today, and will last throughout

our time here, until the bitter end. We, in turn, admire the now-powerful.

Even if we do not worship them we must at least accept our lot in life,

and try to fight the system from the inside. "If you can't beat 'em, join

'em"? Hardly. The ones who stab you in the back with a smile must die

first. Infiltration of the chambers of so-called enlightenment must

proceed without prejudice, yet with extreme disregard for ignorance, and

arrogance, misplaced so called. Yes, arrogance is a virtue, but only tothose who know of its value. The true magician will use avarice, and his

other egomaniacal tools when destroying the armies lined up against

him. Light may shine, but darkness is everything. This may sound like a

very grim prospect, but remember that paradise is a void, unlike the

Garden of Eden. A formless black hole filled with hope, but no man shall


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ever enter. We, as humans, are stuck in our plight. The moon may

become new real estate for us, as parasites, but the masses will never

lead, and we will die anyway. Death, that is, physical decay, is the only

thing that frightens the christian man. Hope of the ever-wonderful

afterlife is what drives the bastards to work, and is what lurks within thecongressional adulterers abode. I have never met a man that didn't

deserve to die, including myself, at one point or another. The difference

between the Magus, and the mundane, is that twain are the former's

forces, and the latter ceases to comprehend either of them. The bending

of reality, even of political anti-reality, is the task of the adept these days.

Ritual workings involving semantics, clever word play, and things of an

experimental nature must be mastered in the twenty-first century, if we

are to break free. I, my friends, am not averse to a society bring formedthat can upstage, and turn upside down, the fates I have predicted. Let us

rise against! However, it is never that simple. I can, from a grand perch

atop my own moderately developed psyche, foresee a time when we are

on the brink of extinction. This dreadful epoch may come many

hundreds of years into the future, but in terms of humanity, is completely

inevitable as if it were happening tomorrow. I have not, and will not,

offer a solution to our problem. It is beyond my own limited mortality to

do so. However, a rallying cry must be heard. It must, therefore, beshouted out loud. A chance for change, to rid the world of christianity,

and Nazarene imagery, is essential, and possible. Such a movement

would create a new slate, to be filled with Satanic churches, Thelemic

law and order, and a citizenship of powerful, carnal, and aethyric

common sense. Alas, the world, or at least America, is not ruled by

common sense. Money and oil are the true powers of the powerful, as it

has been for many years. Inept, inadequate war-mongers use their wealth

to better their own ends, tightening their grip on the ones they rule over,

and evidently rely upon. Democracy be damned, there is no freedom,only complacency. Martial law is a few seconds away, however, if we

remain dazed by our current status, contributing to an imminent culture

crash. Our own rebellion must spark something big. We must react to

our poorly elected officials, and speak out. War within impoverished

nations is not the answer. War on dogma, doctrine, and christianity is,


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however, the necessary way to enact change. Now, that is quite an

abstract and generally unpopular idea. We live amongst a christian right,

a massive popular faith in Jesus. The United States government, to this

day, is still clouded by an invisible, impaled savior's supposed creed.

They are not being held accountable for their actions, and the religiouszealotry behind many recent wartime atrocities are running rampant,

highlighting the current policy. A solution to these and other distinctly

American quandaries may be many fold. I, again, am not in any position

to offer our enemies advice. To bring forth a massive sweep across the

board of Satanic honesty is unrealistic for this and probably any other

governmental system (past, and present). I can only hope that we are

aware of our minority, and trust in our abilities to thrive underground.

Here, in the darkness of our own warm nest, secluded in the environs ofSatan's chamber, we find that magick, mayhem, and mastery are what

will bind our minds together. Undiscovered by the ignorant, their unified

armies will pass us by, leaving us alone. However, they will always seek

to oppress our very right to live in peace. We must be

aware of their treachery at all times. That said, we all know that our

"commander in chief" is a leader of maggots, aiming toward a "moral"

christian state, of global proportions. There is nothing we as occultists

can do to stop this evil empire. In general, on a political scale, our crieswill fall on deaf ears. But, we must still be ready to fight the good fight,

especially intellectually. In our ritual temples we shall bring about our

own empowerment, complete with self-sufficiency and explorations of

the forbidden dark arts. Conventional American society is frightened of

us having even the slightest bit of freedom. It is, therefore, in our best

interests to study, and above all practice the black arts, making full use

of what we know. Power within the underworld will translate well in our

earthly plight. I've mentioned self-mastery, and you should realize that

as a cardinal rule, in relation to America's reliance on government, t.v.,public transit, the military, religion, etc. Our aim is the prospect of

knowing ourselves, so that we can know our enemies. They are all

around us, gaining in numbers, but always stale when it comes to sheer

Will. The slave race of christians, as a result, is not enough to quiet our

heathen, evil pursuits. Revel in sin! The white lighted "right" path is


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pure deception!


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Brother To Us All

I've seen and heard many so called "armchair Satanists" call theirsupreme deity by the title of "Father". This is all well and good for theweak. The amount of superfluous personal degradation that these

practitioners see as a fit due towards Satan himself irks me quite a bit.

Satan is surely to be exalted, but not at a personal cost to the reveler.

Satan has not created us, but is a companion on the path we are thrust

upon. He is our brother. I liken the relationship to that of an older

sibling. More experienced, more knowledgeable, and stronger than his

less travelled younger kin. This is the way I see my relationship withhim anyway. I am certain that, as Satan smiles upon us, he will no doubt

share his secrets and blessings, not because I fear him, but because I

respect him. Granting us power is a key perk to the theistic Satanist. But,

if one cowers in fear before our particular God, one misses the point

entirely. However, I do understand this preoccupation with seeing Satan

as an all encompassing father/master. I too, at one time, certainly felt

that Satan was "the all". But, this was only partially the case. Along with

the infernal majesty and all the benefits of Hell, we must believe in

ourselves, side by side with Satan himself. Who are we to assume such

pretense, you ask? If you must know, then you aren't cut out for this type

of responsibility. While Satan was here before, and rules the unseen, he

is rooting for us here on Earth, to become as he is within the universe. I

understand that this sounds presumptuous, and even unbelievable, but it

is true. As a friend, Satan is unmatched. Working against the strictures of

the christian's parasitic zombie-christ, Satan is with those who exalt his

name, side by side. There are no prerequisites to engage in a discourse

with Satan. And that is common once one has enough knowledge of boththemselves, and their craft. Confidence is essential, and through

experience, of course, one may attain constant communion with what we

call the underworld. Not only may one converse with Satan, but with all

the princes/demons ruling over the vast legions of Hell, and elsewhere.

The miracle of Satanic correspondence is actually not a miracle at all. It


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is a privilege granted to the Satanic adept. Miracles, to be quite honest,

are the crutch of deluded people. What I am describing is within one's

reach every day, yet can never be adequately explained in any text or

format. Friendship is the best way to classify what we're after. In relation

to Satan's power, and our lack of it, one may question how a simplemagician, in human form, may be an equal to one so unattainably gifted.

One may also question the truth behind such claims, as listed above. The

truth is I cannot explain it. This phenomenon, once one has opened their

minds, will explain itself. Man's natural bond with Satan is where we

might begin to find comparable satisfaction to our curiosity. History

marks various times when our kind were thriving and vital, but the

downfall of our truth began, and came, when christianity rose to political

power, especially during the last millennium. With this rise, for morethan a thousand years, we have been at war. That said, Satan knows his

allies. Our small, but capable army fights at Satan's left hand. The weak

fall by the wayside, and the survivors continue to prosper and gain

audience. While the previously mentioned "war" may not be militarial,

but metaphorical, and on a ritualistic scale, we do know that natural

instinct goes a long way in Satanic practices, magick, communication,

and our relationship with Satan. Those who have it know it. And those

who don't commonly pop up in irate posts on some general Satanicinternet forums. Also, with this natural ability, Satan admires devotion.

The magus, through ritual means (summoning, evocation/invocation)

will align one further with where they want to be. "Shemhamforash" and

"Hail Satan" is the way. Listen to those words well, and it will be done.

Satan and Thelema


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become as our superior intelligences would wish us to be. Crowley

himself knew the power of 666. Yet perhaps he was just too much of a

shock-trooper for the society of his era with his seemingly strange, yet

sometimes superficial mix of Satanism and Thelema. Could he have had

both? That was and is the struggle. As some identify Thelema withspirituality, there is always the labeling of Satanism "non spiritual", and

that simply isn't the case. Remember that a new era is always around the

corner, every day if we see fit. Kill the past! We are not the flower

children in conflict over the seemingly conflicting. Now is the time for

exploration!

Death Is Forbidden


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As a Satanist, I see my religion as a constant progression, a step beyondthe strife and restriction of the major popular religions, especially of the

West. My vision is that of free thought and action, and in its wake,

personal exaltation. I love my friends and family, and wish to be rid ofthose who may do us harm. Through Satan, I see a best friend, and a

means to empower myself in this world, and beyond. In Hell, my seat is

secure. And what is Hell? I've been asked this question quite a bit. Hell

is my place in the paradise denied by jehova and his flock. Hell is a

beautiful heaven filled with anything I wish. The point is our collective

views of such a state are not incorrect. As Satan shows us the way, we'll

develop our own niche in the hereafter, always advancing in our

personal quests, and breaking free of the grip of death, and the pale slave

god.

Phase One (A Satanic Banishing)


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Here is a bit of practical magick devised with a preliminary ritualbanishing in mind. Before any magickal workings/operations, one must

clear the ritual space of any negative energies that may be present (or

wish to become present). Doing this simple banishing will rid yourtemple of unwanted forces.

To begin, stand in your magickal circle, and face North. Working

clockwise, at each cardinal point, state the following:

"Unto Belial I am a fiery mass. Pray towards me, but not in Hebrew. In

all languages ye shall know my name." *Shout magickal motto*

Turn towards the North again, and finally repeat the following:

"Satan has come and will watch over me. Hail Satan! I cast away all

who may do me harm. No power is too great that I cannot master it."

While saying the above passage, imagine a red flame engulfing your

body, and purifying the air around you. Meditate on this flame for as

long as you may wish, gaining in heat and intensity.

You may perform this banishing ritual before any magickal working. It

is suitable to replace any standard version.

Phase 2 (A Satanic Meditation)


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Continuing on the above "Phase 1", we go further, and now discuss apersonal meditation rite to connect and dedicate oneself to Satan, or any

other chosen godform. In your ritual temple, properly banish the area.

Proceed to sit in the common Eastern lotus position, close your eyes, andfocus your concentration on the blackness of your mind. Look beyond

this all encompassing space, and get lost in its nothingness. This may

take as long as you like, with an emphasis on total relaxation. Once you

are fully relaxed, open your eyes, and repeat the following:

"Satan, Lord and Ruler of the Earth, I come to you to bestow your power

upon me, your ally on this plane."

Again, close your eyes, and begin to envision a flaming, shining inverted

cross. This cross may change colors, as you see fit, and let each color

(personal preference being the deciding factor) engulf your body. With

eyes still closed, repeat this mantra:

"Ave Satanas!"

(intone : Ah-vey Say-tahn-ahss!)

This mantra should sound like a drone, or a hum, as it leaves your

mouth. Repeat the vibration of this mantra repeatedly, until a calm has

passed over you. You may feel communion with Satan instantly, or over

time. This ritual may be performed at any time (daily, weekly, monthly,

etc). It is perfect as a grounding ritual to continue your evolving

magickal link.

Masonic Christ


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The cultures borne out of Western neglect, yet which turn a blind eye toeverything but their freedom, anticipated the birth of jesus christ,

thousands of years before the conception of the christian bible. The key

to this fact is not only prophecy, but the actual witnessing of a number ofdifferent "christ's" births, many years before the "New Testament". With

the names of crucified messiahs such as Zipe, Merodach, and Uiralocha,

a messiah had risen, and died through solar cults, rendering the modern

jesus christ obsolete before his own time. Sacrificial archetypes of the

axe, cross, and crown of thorns surface in tribes, and tribal ritual, long

before the "bible" mentions its laughable hero. The living breathing gods

that were called forth are far more powerful even today as when they

were baptized in the blood of humanity. The triangle of Set, in the North,

combines to make a square representing two poles. El Shaddai is our

link to Satan, a Masonic mystery that predates our modern hunt for the

distinctions of "good" and "evil". Who are we to believe? Is evil the one

true good in the world? With the age of Freemasonry and the Illuminati

still yet to decide our fates, the Egyptian Set may light our way in as

human a means as possible. With the very death, as ritualistic as any

waged war, those who don't know fight for what they've never

experienced. The people, however, must rise up in the name of Ptah-

Sekar-Ausar and steal the throne of their heaven, their inhumaneblasphemous seat of death. It is with this very act, that we take up arms

and claim the world for ourselves! For centuries, nay, millennia, we've

been lied to. May the words herein revealed bring to light the end of

misery, in favor of our benevolent, carnal, and what they term "evil"

forces. Is their "black magick" the true nature of man? Their version of

good has led us down the wrong path. Covering up the myriad centuries

of magicians, sorcerers, priests, and priestesses of nature, their christ has

fought to erase our history, and mock our very souls into slavery. Byfaith are we numbered like government statistics, and that is exactly how

they like it. Call forth the 7 ancient secrets, and enter the Key of Hiram.

Our new Masonic Christ is among us! And he is nothing like the other.

In fact, our christ is no mere man or woman. We are many, sanctified in

darkness, bound by our oaths that pledge only life. The paradox will be


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placed in the birth of the great lord. The axe and gavel of spatial and

eternal justice shall completely render our code of morals to be the end

to a weak and corrupt list of "10 commandments", set upon earth to

torture, and destroy. To indoctrinate and emaciate humankind's own

citizenship of pagan revelers has been their mission for too long!

Separation Anxiety

(A Cautionary Discussion)


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Yes, even I have been misled from time to time. During my early occultdevelopment, I sought solace in any method, or system that felt familiar,

especially at that time. Maturity, as is its tendency, will prevail, but not

without a great deal of pain, and work. That is the essence of the path,

after all. Finding LaVeyan Satanism at age 15, I admit that I was a bit

wet behind the ears, as they say, and probably too young to appreciate

the finer points of some of LaVey's own "Satanic Bible". My energy, a

vast store of teenage testosterone, led me through the next few years

until I reached the age of 18, with several misguided attempts at creating

a working Satanic idiom under my belt. This is not mentioning the

intense, and immense, study and experimentation I embarked upon inwhat I term "the lost years", and continue to this day. That said, some

previous sexual encounters with, unbeknownst to themselves, what

Anton LaVey would have called "Satanic Witches", formed a basis for

some of my limitless (at age 18) love for LaVeyan sorcery. The

possibilities for such a young lad seemed endless. It was then that I

sought to join the storied, supreme Satanic church itself (I will not name

names, in the interest of some legality). I looked to become a working,

active part of their membership, to naively show off what I had learned,and also to grow with what I thought to be a great part of my evolving

identity. As I had attained membership, quite easily in hindsight, a more

righteous brotherhood had yet been devised, I thought. "Was I prepared

to create, and sculpt the galaxy in my own image?" "Is there no limit to

the blackness of my soul now that I have gained access to this forbidden

cabal?", I asked myself. I was excited to follow in the footsteps of any

who I imagined, in my head, to be brilliant. I, however, was sadly

mistaken. Before my dismal realization, I thought it was time to not

wallow in my darkness, but to take intuition for granted, and grab the

devil by the horns and sharpen my magickal skills. What could go

wrong? Eager to make friends, forge tactics, and become all I wished to

be, I found out that my Satanic ideal, my elite brotherhood, held such

animosity towards theists of any kind, including myself (A self avowed


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Satanic theist in most respects), that no amount of research could quell

my amazement. At long last, or in a split second, my membership was

terminated once they had discovered my leaning TOO far to the left. I

was shocked. How could such a hip, and "cool" order disagree with my

esoteric experimentation? How could they find fault and weakness in mymagickal pursuits? I was to find out that the core of said church was a

judgmental pit of negativity, as a general rule. Not unlike the Catholics,

one might assume. And they'd be correct. Dogma begets dogma, no

matter how fortified with subjective familiarity. At that young stage I

forgot that humans are fallible. Seeking a cause, or an ideal blindly, yet

learning along the way, is a very impressionable position to be in. I'm

not saying that this "church" which I will now label a "crutch",

intentionally misled me. I just did not delve deep enough into theirbrainwashed, fascist subculture to fully realize the magnitude of taking

on membership in their "crutch". Such an endeavor would, in retrospect,

limit my view of the conscious landscape, and in the end waste a year or

so of my time. What were they so afraid of? Why is the said "crutch" so

adamant about anti-theism, especially from a quasi-mixture of

laymanism and intellectualism? It is the greatest paradox of our day. But,

ignorance applies only to the subject being ignored or neglected.

Disavowing knowledge of other realms, states, thoughts, and frames ofreference, is all too easy. But, again, it is all too limiting, especially to

the new wanderer. That is where I was, about 7 years ago. It threw me

for a troublesome loop.

I Am The Guru


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Let it mean whatever you want it to mean. I don't presume to takeliberty with such a staunch, repugnant phrase. However, let us assume

for a moment that we are all reasonably intelligent adepts who may, in a

shocking instance, show their true ignorance. Indeed, the most adept aretruly inept. Socially vulgar vicissitudes leading down the time-tunnel

through untold reaches of human dross, and waste. Yes, a wasteland, not

quite teenage, but relevant to some who never lost their youth! But what

of the young? Possibly revelatory are Lewis Carroll and his treatment of

Alice. Photos, both illicit, and artful, all taken by the master (a doctor

and reverend) himself. It is not my fault if you cannot see what is in

front of you. Forget the forest, and the trees. They were never there, or

were invisible after all. Invisible, to say the very least. "I don't see it! It

isn't apparent! Logic has failed me!" You most certainly say. But, I don't

say, and haven't even said a goddamn word. You create the world for

yourself. In thine own image make up your mind. Useless fantasies are

far better than untapped reality. Face your fears, and a lengthy prison

sentence be handed down swiftly. Fear not! Likely getting stabbed by a

makeshift blade, the seeker must challenge his inner servitors to channel

the pain, channel the death, and thus rise up. Initiation! Somehow we've

finally scratched the surface! How did it happen? Surely, in that day and

age one needed no less than the internet to excel at rhetoric. Read abook! Digest the terms therein and forego idle chatter. Actions, indeed

decisive actions, speak louder than any stationary banter. But, those who

"do" may find themselves without purpose, or direction. They are still

empty inside. Even the ones who are so accomplished that they feel

incessant inner pain may cry without honor. A penny saved is not a lot of

money. Remember to scrimp frugally to truly earn your place at the

bottom. Feed well upon the slugs and worms, and the salt on your

tongues may exact fine revenge. Revenge may come sooner, if you doyourself in. But please, save the grief for television. Those who notice

nothing are everywhere. What accounts for brilliance in the fiery embers

of disillusionment is meaningless to those in the baser realms. And those

locations are infinite, and everywhere, even right here. From where I sit,

I see all. But, so do you. So do they. Only "god" can judge, and death is


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our lord and savior. Master? Possibly. We can't pretend anymore. You

cannot hide from flesh and bone. Yogic prana, by what the siddhi have

told me, is our life-force, within everything, surrounding us. Yet, it isn't

tangible, or measurable. It isn't something to pray for. It is in the present,

here, and now. Once the finality of death has emerged, prana takes overfor ever. A cruel joke, I suspect. Never one to miss an opportunity to

laugh at myself, I give you all a hearty Ha! Ha! Banish therein! Pure

good, and kindness, and the breath of life itself is in laughter. The hyena

cackles when the carcass is bloated. Communicate with each other.

Learn to notice our signature sounds, and voices. Accept our wants, and

misgivings. Happiness is ours in this climax. Bark loudly, once satisfied.

Pray. The essence of human prayer is sacrifice. Me? I pray to the walls

which surround me. I've never known solace, but always sought refugefrom the forces I could not understand. And once face to face with those

holy demons, I am one with them, and you. The last "end of the world",

or world war 3, will be our feast, neither greater, nor lesser. This ultimate

supper shall mock the unveiling by flaunting their superior weaknesses.

Do they know more than those mere mortals? Flawed sycophants get all

the glory. Especially in the end. "I am the guru" they say. "I've learned

all the lessons", they'll implore. And maybe, just maybe, they're correct

in their honesty and piety within themselves. Egotism, andmegalomania, are admirable traits in a blind date. Excitement can never

be too far behind a supposed messiah. "I am the guru" you will

undoubtedly utter. And you are right. Within and without, we only

answer to ourselves. It's a lonely world, surrounded by friends and

family, do-gooders, and evil-doers. All of them. I never met a man I

didn't envy, even when I was in my own little world. Everyone's better,

and the grass is always greener. What can I say? What can we do? Sing

this mantra, first, last, and always: "I am NOT the guru...OM"

A Call To Arms!


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Take up thy creed! Enact change in your work and become one withSatan! To dedicate yourself to the black arts is to love thyself. We, in our

turn with Satan, are the rulers of the Earth! We are all encompassing.

The inverted cross, non-biblical, serves our common good, and willshine on, in the dark pit. We seek only the most dedicated revelers to

join our crusade for personal godhood. Satan is with us, and we must

destroy the pallid redeemer's message, bit by bit, in its entirety. By the

forces of Hell, and by the might of our supreme Lord! Hail Satan! Hail

Thyself!

The Meaning Of Personal Freedom (A

New Standpoint)


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The major religions of the world are based on guilt. So called "sins" arelisted to bring about a conditioned, herd mentality response, in order not

to go "against god". Penance is offered for one who has "sinned", by

kneeling before their god, belittling himself. They live in fear of their

god, and exist in such a state of restriction that they strive to be inhuman

sheep. We aren't remotely related to the fear mongering slaves they

manufacture daily. Satan has never told us what to do. We do not live in

fear of his "wrath" because it is non-existent. We live like everyday may

be our last, and thus our God is happy. As a result, we must never revel

in guilt. To the Satanist, guilt is a sin, if there ever was one. But, I don't

like to call anything a "sin" per se, as personal exploration is a definitevirtue, and necessity. As we research into our own humanity, our likes

and dislikes, through constant experimentation, we are that much closer

to complete freedom, freedom from guilt especially. Live free!

Notes on The Black Mass


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There have been throughout history many different versions of theinfamous Black Mass. Some call it a purely christian

perversion/inversion. Some still maintain that it's a Satanic reaction to

"proper" authority. In my opinion, if performed correctly, a Black masscan evoke the very essence of Hell, and provide a place here on Earth

where we are exalted, and praised. "Traditional" masses may feature an

altar consisting of a nude woman. Others can require ritual

implements/tools to adorn the altar. One may chant the catholic "lord's

prayer" backwards, or simply recite one's own concoction of Satanic

sentiments for all those gathered in celebration. Never, in any true Black

Mass, will there be a physical sacrifice, animal, human, etc. If a group

wishes to evoke destructive forces, they may do so by proxy, by way of

effigies, sigilism, the burning of parchments, and creative personal

thoughts. However the mass is constructed and performed, it must

always be in a purely Satanic context. No allusion to christianity may be

performed at any time for the integrity of the rite to remain intact.

Therefore, the aforementioned popular, backwards recitation of the

"lord's prayer", while a common staple in anti-Satanic propagandist

folklore, is inappropriate and incorrect. In our worship, we must distance

ourselves far away from any occidental trappings. It is bad enough that

the free world considers traditional Satanic theists as mere devilworshippers. In place of the backwards prayer, I've mentioned creating

one's own sentiment to be read aloud, during the mass, remembering that

Satan enjoys sincerity, and creativity.

Fragment


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Ritualistic constructions are only effective when the mind of the Magusis cultivated towards the desired end. If a ritual is devoted to a frivolous

result, especially without intellectual focus, the operation is doomed to

both fail, and cause emotional damage. This is also true of a workingwithout a proper preparation, and/or closing, regardless of the content at

the core of the rite. Now, I realize the amount of considerable work and

study this requires, especially in relation to the Great Work itself (when

one takes into account a regimen of purely psychic temple settings,

experienced without the use of a physical altar). Workings, including the

infamous Black Mass, can all be performed entirely within the mind of

the magician. Preliminary, preparatory visualizations, and meditational

practice, can build up one's arsenal of psychodramatic ability. As a

result, it is not impossible to exist purely in the imaginary/psychic realm,

in relation to the work. That is not to say that actual physical ritual

practices are not effective. Quite the opposite is true. But, in the invisible

world, there is no distinction.

A Further Note (Troublesome Ideals)


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It's difficult for me to express myself without becoming idealistic aboutnot only where I should be, and who I am, but who, and where everyone

else "is", or "should" be. Such general statements are common to most

people with inflated egos, but I swear to you that this is different. Insteadof speaking in "E-Prime", I will use definitive statements to express not

only my hope, but my exhaustion. Satanism, when applied correctly (and

who am I to "correct" anyone?) liberates the mind so that one can do,

and say, whatever they wish, without feeling self conscious. There is a

difference between self-consciousness, and egocentrism. Most of those,

who are out of the loop, will confuse the two, and commonly prefer the

latter to be used in snap judgments of ideologies they know nothing

about. The point is all ideals are troublesome. Someone will invariably

disagree, and put one to task over what has been said, or has perceived

to have been said. Don't be afraid to stand up and practice the art of

public speaking, especially if you have a need to convey a new message.

Satanism is such a topic that, while incendiary, will inspire your core

audience, when addressed with the right amount of intuitive gusto, and

spry discourse. This is what christianity is so afraid of; a passionate and

erudite discussion completely upstaging, and replacing, centuries of utter

trash with codes, and ethics, portrayed by those who need no god, yet

choose to follow the one, true icon of freedom, and individuality.

Call To Disorder


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Ihave never seen a more promising field of occult view, among such atroubling and disturbing period of time. Our disaffected, and rightly so,

maneuver to protest the religious right, daily, is important to the

preservation of the Satanic underground. Such "over-ground" tacticsgalvanize our state of diabolic grace, and sends our enemies further into

disarray. However, we must understand our position within the world's

cultural stage. A Satanist is not afforded the same public glee, or

satisfaction, as a christian or a jew. Our life is that of silent superiority,

and we must proclaim that fact until it becomes second nature.

Understanding, in general, is not a traditionally popular human emotion.

Herd conformity is one of the only animal traits celebrated by even the

most powerful members of the human race. Carnal "sins" are looked

down upon only by those who are the grand purveyors of hypocrisy. The

federal government has a very large investment in this very principle.

Remember, to them it is righteous to be holy, and holy to be righteous.

We see this as an obvious puzzle, and are hard pressed to find another

explanation. Humanity is much like an "organized", sleeping and angry

mob. Here and now don't amount to anything. Comfort and tranquility

account for our main concerns, even if we abandon the very virtues that

make us human. I'd rather live on a raft, in the middle of the Atlantic

Ocean, than make a decision on land, amounting, in effect, to my currentsense of displeasure, and non-abatement. Sadness, and depression will

come and go in their stead, and our eyes will only focus on the light sent

from some distant star, to warm us and bring us some superficial

comfort. Certainly, this luxury turns out to be irrelevant in the end.

During our time here, our grip on the "certain" will vary, and will behave

in an unfriendly manner. The human mind likes to play tricks on us most

of the time. That's in itself the essence of our earthly stability, if there is

such a thing. Sitting Indian style, we will feel the tingle at the base ofour spine, shooting from the brain, and out of our eyes. If we weren't

suicidal then, we are now. Dispersion and discord reign supreme in the

panic of our organization, as bees within the hive.


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The Afterlife?


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They'd have you believe that there's a heaven after you die. Lookingfavorably upon what we've done, even if our deeds are evil. That is the

message, and truth, of christianity; to repent unconditionally while

committing acts of cruelty to the churches of our fellow man. Abolishedare the ways of life beknownst to the angels. As Hell becomes paradise,

we seek judgment only here on earth, and delight in the carnal with what

little life we have left. There are no blue skies for the dead, or the living

for that matter. Whatever the poets spoke of, a sort of bliss privy to the

artist, is all meaningless in death. The eyes forever closed, and nothing

to satiate a once vital brain. All of the build up and suspense of a

troubled childhood lies ending in the divorce of the one institution that

may account for life itself. To say that life is a lie is only half true. What

we've seen amounts to everything, only to be engulfed in absolutely

nothing. It's easy to sit back and counter the "right", seemingly negating

all that they'd thrown upon you. If I may sound so presidential, the

mission is to wake up, and stay awake. I don't know how to enact a

perfect system of life and permanent sleep, akin only to jehovahs

infinite "plan", but I hope that our notions of paradise reside here, in our

physical world. As this is all we really know, or can speak of, who are

we to praise christ and his cult's earthly construction? It's a big failure as

far as I am concerned. We mustn't worry about death, or even self worth.If the existentialists had their way, we'd all be happy, well adjusted

people, knowing only what we know, and bringing with us what we

have, or think we have. There is beauty in that line of thought, the

submission to Ain Soph Aur. I'd be remiss if I didn't get Qabalistic at

least once.


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POETRY (And Otherwise):

"The Queen"


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Forgive me for intrusion,

Upon this dire land.

My magister's illusion

Beyond his own left hand.

A savior seeks to reckon,

With the master, underfed.

Beyond the veil, she beckons

Towards the Queen of the Undead.

Upon a beast, or lion headed

Dragon with its tail.

To toss the heads, on spikes embedded

Of those who would not fail.

Perseverance, in the end

Is not a welcome fate.

To die alone, with death to rend,

The Queen becomes Death's mate.

"Adventures Of A Lodgemaster":

Sight unseen.


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Psychic sex and severe ordeal.

Initiate, in all his wonder.

Risk of suffocation,

Or gunshot wounds,

With and without the Temple.

Oath of secrecy,

Rape of the naive is a very common practice.

Egyptian sun,

Pyramidic geometry,

Or a funeral procession.

What is the point?

Initiation, my friend.

Initiation.

"Revelation 93":

Past regime long overdue,


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Overstays its welcome

In the kingdom of lies.

The priest of the princes,

Connected and dissected

By the dead, and dying.

Folklore untold by cultures,

Spawned by the Caliphate.

California, here we come.

The hidden god unveiled.

Peace and love on its knees.

Bent over towards the holy sepulchre.

I cannot see the end.

For the digital shows its pride

In displaying erotic misgivings.


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The price is paid.

Dues are met.

Franchise stakes are high.

Fondlers are not only popes,

But the very core of

The foreign dialect.

Ritualistic manners are given,

Unto those who shed the same skin,

For Isis and Eris.

Chaos is more than they

Ever bargained for.

Being such austere receptacles.


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Seldom sacred,

Yet always autobiographical.

I spit upon their hexagram.

Unicursal clues in a new age.

Beckoned to the temple,

A Neophyte waits to be prodded.

Heru Ra Ha.

Light And Laughter.

He mentioned a Book Of Balance.

Sanctum Regnum.

Holy of Holies.

Holiest, thou are not.

Gallons of fluid, both blessed,

And egocentric.


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That is the key of it all.

I never imagined the number.

He knows it all too well.

Bedevil, be damned.

White god of a blackened race.

Seek and ye shall destroy.

Crusaders are many in this time of need.

Priceless work of sullen art.

Nuit, in the sky, at night.

I am so many stars.

Infinitely great and restless,

The poet will die by a dead hand.

Swing from the noose, for his own sake.


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The gift of sacrifice

Is from the East,

Never the West.

Drive safely the vehicle

Which commences its run

With a ride upon the camel.

Hilarious souls banish

With laughter the demons we all know.

Dispersion is cast.

Below is above.

But, when looked down upon,

Our eyes are filled with ambergris.

The scent, followed by the release


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Of the vomit of a million planets,

Aligned perfectly, will set the pace.

Diseased, and rotting carcasses.

All religions become such as

Mentioned above.

Hail Eris!

Discordia in the Abbey of Thelema!

Revolution rideth as does the Scarlet Woman!

Trust no one,

Not even those who know.

They will always prefer ignorance.

Media minded internet hound.

To hunt down the past, one must


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Use a dull blade.

Fuck the new age.

There will always be a

Reason for Aquarius to die.

Speak the truth,

It has been shouted.

Yea, it has been shouted.

"Goddess Of The Flood":

Fleece the flaccid,


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Shaven with shears that shorn.

God himself goes unto god.

As but for the grace of I, go I.

Smash the putrid.

Dead desires of reeking flesh.

We've said it once,

I've said it without my knowing.

Remnants of a forgotten world,

Undone by common devils.

My worship is of Kali.

Untapped Seminal Virgin.

Savior of the wishing well.

Rain on! Rain on!

Sea of death, and oral doctrines,

Our only pleasure exists to


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Pleasure myself and all the flock.

Commentary On "Goddess Of The Flood"


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The poem is a bit too stark for its own good. Sometimes I prefer toleave the obvious out in the open, for everyone's own interpretation. But,

I say "fuck mystery". Let's get right to the point. Is there a point? I

wonder. Yes, there is always a revelation, or a bit of wonder to nail amessage home. In my opinion, that's the basis of all good art. And so

with "Goddess Of The Flood", I employed a sort of sexual/magickal

imagery, especially in the few lines related to Kali. She is the only actual

deity I name in the piece, but I don't think she represents all of the

femininity I envision and describe in the poem. Perhaps I feel a certain

disdain for motherhood, or those relating to certain Lunar cults/cycles,

and fertility rites. Whatever is going on here, the message is in no way

misogynistic. It merely basks in the glory of a metaphorical menstrual

tide. In the beginning, it seems that I write of myself, only to identify

later with the surrender to feministic beauty and complexity. Balance, as

in the case of male and female energies, must unite both, even with

respect to the ego. The psyche must persist with both, to see

megalomania give way to oneness with everything.

"Silent Vigil":

Illness beckons,


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And time runs out.

The cancer is spreading,

With ease no doubt.

Religion Thelema,

My own special cure,

Will never be known,

And will never be pure.

If sanity dies,

I will too, as I lay.

But first I will spit upon

The mourners who pray.

Some Haikus For A Non-Japanese Culture

"God's Love"


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Hail Eros! Hail Pan!

It's a pleasure to have lived

With your warm embrace.

"Bombs"

No Jesus, know peace.

Yes, the fish is upside down!

Wars win, in the end.

"Cynical Balancing Act"

Faltered in my steps.

Will I ever stand upright?

As straight as a priest?

Scant Comments on The Haikus


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On "God's Love": While I believe in the stability of the human race, not

as an evolutionary wonder, but as a parasite, I must ponder upon how

religion has surely divided us all. I've found that only in chaos can we

get back to everything that matters. Everything, that is, that will redeem

our curiosity.

On "Bombs": War is inevitable, and constant, especially on this planet.

In a bumper-sticker slogan culture, we must question even ourselves,

and if we'd fight to defend our personal wellbeing against invading

forces. I salute those who know why they fight. I will never rally behind

an ignorant army.

On "Cynical Balancing Act": Even the most pious, devoted, andseemingly loving person, will most definitely turn out to be a crooked

bastard. This is a fact, kids. Oh yes. Years will go by and our childlike

adoration will turn into political insight, into the superficial world at

large. Morality and utter baseless piety will form a surreal backdrop

against perceived sin, and may also shave years off of devastation, guilt,

and likely prison terms.

Satan Settles Down (Disorganized

Scripture)


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Verse 1 (Averse):

Mock fire and thou shalt know your shame.Why so invisible? Why does thou hideth such glorious humor?

Enigmatic waves float through this ugly vein. Her ignored

satiation is lustful carnage.

Scorn her, the goddess, and destroy as thou wilt.

"Not knowing is knowing", sayeth the Fool. And he is your king.

Verse 2 (Lack Of Any Commandments):

Christ never lived, especially before A.D.

Think on this, children, and Beelzebub will come to you in the

daylight.

Oh clouds, and misty spray upon my face.

This is the requiem of the nocturnal. Sleep, and the wall beyonddreaming will become sour.

Stay awake, and devour those children who play down the street.

Verse 3 (Sing For Death):

Or Daath? (says the title!).

Middle pillar wandering with such a vapid climb.

The grey matter meets a grey magickal earth, filled with wine,

and heroin.


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Addiction! Lo! Addicts will reign, as they have forever.

Take heed when the needle marks become encrusted.

For therein, is the stigmata.

Verse 4 (May-December):

Forget in between the lying and cheating.

Fatherly love will destroy this Aethyr.

And, your "god" is too weary for any new therapy sessions.

Commit this lewd act at your own peril!

Nay! Peril is charming when acted upon with brute forcetowards your dear old mother.

Verse 5 (Tarot):

Trouble makes itself known, but don't feel sad.Within the mind are the tools to enact thy will, or else thou shalt

NOT.

Oh, thou are not a commandment. For there is no such thing, in

the realm of the reasonable.

Possibly hurtful, but in any case, "a healthy ego will withstand

any Aeon", said the Hierophant.

Verse 6 (No Thought For The Long-Term):

The tedious ways have gone before a courtship of the mysterious

bride.


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Think well, for in 93 there are quite a few other formulas, or

numbers included.

This happens to be a message in the form of pedantry.

Choose your words and the doors will open.But, for now, all is slammed wide shut.

Comments On Disorganized Scripture

Those poetic ramblings, stated above, are much more than mindless


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drivel. In them, the practitioner will find a significant Western mantra, to

wipe clean the psyche, and exact a program of sheer, implicit, logic upon

the mind. For all the beautiful girls, they say. But, I digress...

With a focus on the eleven fold cross, and the enhanced vision through

hallucinogenic smoke, the man on the mountaintop singing on high isyou, after all. How clear all of the verses will be is not for me to decide.

I've constructed my own series of personally pertinent degrees of

consciousness, so that the "disorganized scriptures" have nothing to do

with me. But, they have everything to do with everyone else. Time is on

your side when trying to decode each concocted verse. They will mean

something different, every single day, with whatever words are attached.

Thus, each sentence is in fact a life sentence of meditational retreat

(without sleeping in a tent light years away from civilization). Now,we've described them as "scriptures", but they are not in reference to a

christian bible. We must unlearn the importance placed on these types of

words as used in occidental circles, and create a fresh

meaning/perspective. Derived from a free, surreal hand, one may be the

star of an entirely new bible, the Aeonic Testament, if you will. With

anti-christian themes (as always), this proposed Aeonic book is not filled

with folklore, or legend. It is a truthful account of every Satanic mindset

with a new, everlasting logos. This idea is embodied in the six verses.One must read, and digest, and discover oneself in a clean, white room,

without christ, or soul, but filled with knowledge, vice, and love. You are

no longer enclosed within a pine box. The undertaker is dead, and our

morgue is a holy church. The left handed are exalted, and those who

may mock these verses are drawn and quartered. Verse 1 is a recognition

of the elementals. Sexual tarot is unveiled in Verse 1, as it speaks of and

hints at lust, and never rape. Verse 2 is heretical, and will matter only to

those who search for a new meaning with each read. Nothing is left to

chance, however, as in Verse 3 we highlight the Qabalistic essence ofany and all pillars, leading to our planned demise, and rebirth, through

specific experimentation. Verse 4 is the romantic side of carnality, but

always keeping an eye on social/contemporary mores. Verse 5 brings the

meaning, and purpose, of all pursuits in life, to the fore. Humanity is

destructive, and we all must realize that. Finally, Verse 6 begs the reader


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to write their own bible, as mentioned previously in this passage. Even

the windbags of the early A.D. can be put to task for their linguistic

criminality!

Chaos!

Rock and Roll, and the vast array of popular (and underground) musicavailable to us today has been called "the soundtrack to our lives". This


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multiple deities for our own worshipful consumption? Breasts, feathers,

horns, hooves, "solve et coagula". Invoking this force is proof that life

exists everywhere. The sacred hermaphrodite, with its love spread out

for all to be amazed. Animalistic devilry around the stone altar. Wisdom

of the old gods, yet every new day will begin with a glimpse of thefuture. Hail Baphomet! Lucifer, bringer of light, may spark the torch

upon the head of Baphomet! Milk from its teats will starve the inept, and

reward those with balance. The shackles of "male" and "female" are

thrown below the inverted pentagram. Watching over the sanctified orgy,

candles burning, and a sacrifice to guide the dead. As below, so be it.

Below is Hell, mind you. No! Hell does not exist. Our minds are

beckoning to Baphomet. The secret chiefs call upon you, and Baphomet

is the end all/be all. Remember that any foul beast is soothed bytemperance! Lyrical accompaniment, and bard-like balladry, may

entertain our solar aspects. Within the tidal force of the moon, Baphomet

is especially sympathetic. We recognize its facets on all of our work with

Baphomet, and religious work in general. Flying above the bloody sea,

courting divine scales of justice, and feeding knowledge to us all, this is

what we must focus on. Hail Baphomet!

Direction Of A Modern Satanist

Question authority.

Defy authority.


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Destroy Authority.

Transcend authority.

The above is probably the best way I can describe the (hopeful)

worldview of the modern Satanist. With our worship, and sorcerer's

conjurations, we must still be ever aware of how little our group controls

in the world at large. We don't live, or exist, to be tyrannical, but Satan's

throne is not to be taken lightly. Humanity, especially American society,

is afraid of what is not occidental. And even then, the various popular

sects despise and slander each other daily. That said, brotherhood, in a

Satanic context, is not a Satanic concept. We think apart, only engagingthose who have passed our personal tests. But, to form a nucleus of

individual thinkers may be a noble undertaking in the unfolding century.

Established Satanic churches seek to separate and control. No matter

how well intentioned, or attractive a popular Satanic group's dogma is,

it's still dogma in my opinion. I seek an ideal, yes. A Satanic utopia? No.

Separation, united by personal efficiency, distrust for stupidity, and

autonomy of the mind is what we should really be aiming for. It's what

all the masses think they've already achieved. But, they are kiddingthemselves, of course. It is they who put up barriers, and are the true

obstacles on the path to freedom. And, I don't mean "freedom" in how

George W. Bush understands it, but complete disregard for unrealistic

authority. That is essential. The only right a human being has, of any

value, is to do his/her Will. Just as Crowley stated all those years ago.

And, sectarian pseudo-Satanic bigots, who frown upon the use of

Thelema in their mentality, can learn a thing or two from Crowley's

inspired notion. It is clear that today's Satanist would deeply benefit

from study in areas of all kinds, especially of allied magickal/occultthemes such as Thelema. Many pundits will scoff, and even launch death

threats at one for mentioning such "blasphemy". But, this is a time for

evolution. Evolution, as we know, is a constant process. Whatever has

been said here is not definitive, or concrete. In the long run, everything

is only a step upon the path. The strong remain, the weak wither and die.


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For those who wish to communicate with the author, emails may be sent

to: [email protected]

the man with confused eyes

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