The Mayonnaise Jar and 2 Cups of Coffee

"Hey Mommy, what are you staring at? Are you listening, Mom?""I said, after watching Enteng Kabisote, let us pass by at Dad's favoriterecord store and buy him a new CD.""Shhhh... All right, Josh...," I whispered. "Mom heard you loud and clear," I replied.Josh just turned 5 years old last December 25. Those five years of being a Mom to a very handsome, sweet and smart kid is probably the most exciting and fulfilling stage of my life.I'll be 28 years oldthis Feb. 14. At my age, I can recognize all theanime characters -- from Ghost Fighter to Ragnarok, to Lupin to Mask Ryder. Josh loves watching television and most of the time, I am his TV buddy.Whenever I would arrive home from work, he is always ready with hisnever-ending stories of what he did at school and what had happened toMask Rider Ryuki.Some of my morning rituals, though repetitive, are never boring. I usuallywake up at 5AM, take shower, prepare Josh's uniform, and makesure all his stuff are inside his bag including his baon.Then I would wake up his yaya and ask her to give Josh a bath, while Iprepare myself for the office.In between putting on my blush-on and lipstick, I would always hear Joshgiggling, yelling and making fun of his Yaya Ella.In most times, I would get jealous of Ella, they get along well.Josh is much like his dad, they are both makulit. At his young age, Josh loves listening to music and oftentimes mimics all rockers he sees onMTV. Before Josh disrupted my thoughts about the CD he wished to buy for hisDad, I was in a trance, pondering the first time I met Kelvin...It was Valentines Day of 1997 when I first laid eyes on him, it was also my 20th birthday then.I found myself sitting alone in one of the waiting sheds of the campus,when I noticed him walking directly to my direction. He was wearing a pair of jeans and a plain white t-shirt. Every stride he made toward my place made me nervous.His good looks and boyish features became too evident as he came closer. Iwas so conscious that I stood up and tried to walk away until he calledout, "Mariz, wait!"I stood still, thinking, "how did this guy whom I never met before know myname?"As I turned my head and looked back, he smiled and uttered, "Happy Valentines".He then handed me a red rose.I smiled back, sat down and we talked.

I learned that Kelvin was an admirer, who befriended one of my classmatesto get to know me as well.He confessed that he, together with my classmates, really planned thatparticular day -- I found out it was the reason I sat alone, waitingwithout my usual tropa. We talked for almost an hour -- we were comfortable conversing. Ilearnedthat we were both on our junior year, he was taking up ECE whileI, Business Ad. We both studied at PLM.Kelvin and I became very close -- he loved poetry and music; I liked crossstitching.He was always the first one to laugh whenever he delivered a joke. As forme, I often laughed at his jokes because he laughed like a gorilla.We became inseparable since the first time we met. Kelvin became theclosest person to me aside from my family.On the eve of my graduation, after more than a year of friendship/courtship, he became my first boyfriend.In 1998, I graduated from college, and Kelvin was on his 5th year in ECEthen. I remember during the graduation rites at PICC, Kelvin was hesitant tocome and see me receive my diploma because that will also be the firsttime for him to meet my family. I forced him though. I introduced Kelvinto my family, oh, I could not forget that scenario. He was so nervous andpale.June of 1998, I was employed in one of the top corporations in Ortigas,while Kelvin was on his last year inEngineering.At that time, we saw to it that our relationship will not be tested by thetemptations of the corporate world and tried our best to fight hisinsecurity of still "being a student".Every relationship, as they say, has its ups and downs. Kelvin started toshow signs of jealousy and insecurity. We seldom went out on dates, healways had excuses.Behind all his aloofness, I knew then that he just did not want me tospend money on our dates.His pride was slowly tearing our relationship apart during those times.There were couple of nights I spent crying instead of resting. Myco-workers were asking me to give up Kelvin, they insisted that life andlove in college was different when starts working in the corporateworld.October 26, 1998, Kelvin's birthday. I surprised him while he and hisstudy group were busy finishing their case study onMicroprocessorClockSpeed.I showed up wearing my old college uniform. He was shocked and he staredlong at my old uniform, then he embraced me so hard that I raced for mybreath.When he let go, I saw tears in his eyes. He kept repeating how much heloved me and that he was sorry for pushing me away.He confessed that, he was so jealous and insecure that he wanted me tofind some other guy that could treat me out in any restaurant I wanted;buy me anything I pleased; or fetch me with nice cars; and shower me withgifts.Then I found myself crying for I never had known then how much I lovedKelvin, until I knew how sensitive he was.How he wished to give me the WORLD, when I only longed for a single redrose.February 14, 1999, on my 22nd birthday, he gave me one red rose; same aswhat he gave me when we first met two years before.And I swore then, that was the only thing I wished to receive.

Thursday, April 1, 1999, Kelvin fetched me from work. He bragged allafternoon, he said he will graduate on the 30th, Friday.He kept on asking me to address him as Engineer Kelvin Regalado. I did.That night, we made love for the first time. It was passionate andunforgettable.April 18, 1999, our2nd anniversary, Kelvin composed this poem in front ofme.

Star shine's bright on a darkest night...being with you makes every thing right...here is my heart with love as pure as white...here are my arms that will hug with all my might...at the bottom of the lighthouse maybe the darkest, amidst fears andsorrows... I'll be abreast atop mountains and hills maybe the loneliestbut if you find yourself there..... close your eyes think of me... I'llbe there, my dearest.Exactly a week before Kelvin's graduation, at around 5:30 in the afternoon, I received a message from my beeper, it was from his younger brother, Jethro. The message said, "Kuya is at PGH, emergency room".I hurriedly jumped into the first available taxi, I was literally crying ariver.I was accustomed to be greeted with smiles by Kelvin's family, but thatnight was different. They were all crying, and I needed not any word fromthem to know what was happening.Jethro nonetheless, told me the whole story -- The police came to theirhouse and brought them to the hospital because Kelvin was shot in apawnshop hold-up incident and that his condition was critical.Jethro narrated that while Kelvin was pawning his necklace which he received from his aunt as an advanced graduation gift, two hold-uppers suddenly showed up and shot both guard and Kelvin. Jethro's last narration dropped like a bomb on my ears. Apparently, Kelvintold Jethro why he wanted to pawn the necklace."Alam mo Jethro, ayos tong gift ni Tita, isasanla ko muna, para ipambiliko ng singsing, akomagreregalo kay Mariz sa graduation ko."April 24, 1999, Kelvin died. Up to now I can't find the words to expresshow I felt then.April 30, 1999, all of us whom he'd touched, whom he'd shared jokes with;all those who had read his poems, who had heard his songs, weremarching not toward PICC for his graduation, but to his funeral.It was the worst breakup.Two months after Kelvin died, I was diagnosed as pregnant. I cried andcried until tears rolled out empty.My family spoke no word, they pitied me. I thought they would kill me, beashamed of me, but that did not happen.Both my family and Kelvin's supported me and showed how much they loved me.December 25, 1999, instead of humming Christmas songs and crying over the thoughts of not celebrating it with Kelvin, I gave birth to a boy I namedJosh.Since then, the happiness that Josh and I share is beyond what his dadwould have planned for me.I am no longer particular with dates and time, I don't even wear awatch,and I just make each day with my kid a day to cherish.Each day at the office is an opportunity to give Josh a better life,education and future.It all started with one red rose.And until there is a rose, I will never be hopeless."Hey mommy, are you crying?""No son.""Magaling ba si Enteng?""Di ka naman nanunuod, mommy eh.""Lika ka na, bili na tayo ng CD para ke Daddy.""Ayos, Mommy, tiyak mapapagalitan na naman si Daddy niSan Pedrodahilmalakas na naman yun kung magpatugtog." "Di ba Mommy?""Opo."

End of story