The Why (rough)

Disclaimers:

A do it yourself project

I will be talking about a wide range of topics in this book

and you may find yourself coming across terminology or topics that

you are unfamiliar with. Now, while it is one of my goals for this

book to be as readable as possible, there will definitely be some

things that you are going to want to look up for yourself. I will

probably ask you to do this by saying something like Dont take

my word for it, do some research on your own! Some people may

fault me for not explaining everything in detail or perhaps not

putting things in very simple terms, but it is more important for me

to communicate what Im trying to communicate as accurately as

possible than it is for me to describe things with less descriptive,

precise terminology so that some people might grasp it better. That

being said, if you find at moments it gets wordy, mathy, or techy,

please do yourself a favor and do at least a little research to better

understand what Im trying to say if you are finding it difficult in

that particular part of the book. If at some point you are thinking to

yourself, there is no evidence for this! or this cant be true! or

this guy doesnt know what hes talking about and you HAVENT

done the research? That is no fault of mine and the only person you

can blame for that is yourself. I understand that its not reasonable

to expect everyone to do the amount of research and reflection Ive

done to come up with similar conclusions, but that is one of the

reasons Im writing a book so you dont have to sift through so

much information to find similar things. I will be giving you sources

for ideas as much as possible. This book is NOT for the passive

reader. This book will be asking your active participation and focus

for the entire duration of your read. If that sounds unattractive to

you, then perhaps this is not a book you want to read.

This book is not a science book, but there will be science. It

is not a book about religion, but I will discuss it. This is not a

philosophy book, but it will require deep thought. I could go on

with different genres of books and topics, but the point is simple.

Although the book could not be described as one of these things it

contains these things within its parts. It is in it of itself something

entirely different though. If someone showed you the color purple

and asked you what color it was you wouldnt say oh thats blue

and red! No doubt you would just address it by its name post

mixing, although blue and red are a part of its makeup.

I wanted to know where these colors came from. I

wanted to know and still want to know why I experience reality the

way I do and if I can do my own color mixing to create a new one. I

will be showing you blue and red, yellow and blue, and red and

yellow and then I will show you purple, green, and orange in a

manner of speaking differentiation and integration. Hopefully by

the time this book is finished you will see all of these beautiful

color combinations and the bases of red, orange, yellow, green,

blue, indigo, and violet, and then you will see and understand the

white light it came from before it ever hit the prism.

I dont know everything, quite the contrary.

My aim in writing this book is not validate myself by

attaching this sum of knowledge to my intellectual identity. If

anything, to me it more honorable and right to present something,

later realize things you missed, and then have the courage to go

back and address your mistake publicly. Lets just be honest for a

moment we all make mistakes! Surprise! We all miss things and

Im no different, I dont aim to be perfect; I aim to be me. Im as

perfect right now as Ill ever be in any given moment because all I

have is the vital now, and yet that does not stop me from

passionately pursuing progress and making myself and people

around me better.

I am certainly going to do my best to be well prepared,

widely, and well studied and accurate to the best of my ability with

my statements. I do urge you, if you find some fault in the way I

have written this book or the subject matter itself, do not allow that

rob you of its beautiful underlying message. I believe we are in

desperate need of transformation in our world right now and this

is me trying to do my part and play my role. So you over critical,

cynical,fact lusting, skeptical readers? Do yourself a favor and let

your guard down, relax your mind and just be open to new ideas

and perspectives. Be willing to accept that we dont know

everything down here on earth (even with science) and that there

may be some things that you just havent realized. Like I said

before, I dont write this book to put my ego on a pedestal. I think I

have something valuable to say so Im going to say it.

Removing the stigmatic labels.

There will be many times that I may use a term that

already has some type of significance attached to you based your

interpretation of the word and what it has meant in your life to this

point. What I want you to do is detach from the label and look at

the deeper meaning behind it.

The most pertinent word regarding the removal of

preexisting social and cultural ideas/stigmas will be God. Everyone

already has an idea of what this word means in his or her head.

Unfortunately it often seems to have nothing to do with the fullness

of its meaning (which is hard to accomplish when talking about a

word like god anyhow). I want explain a little bit of what I mean

when I say this word so that we are on the same page going

forward; and after I explain this, please apply the same principle to

the rest of the terminology that already has social and religious

stigmas attached to it. When I say the word God, I am referring to

something that has been referred to in many ways for a long time

something that we have been struggling to find and understand

and somehow make a part of our lives. I am talking about the

center, the nucleus, the creator of the universe, the energy that

sustains and holds together everything, consciousness, pure love,

mystery, unfathomable power and this has absolutely nothing to

do with any religion or book or preconceived notion. God to me is a

mystery as he is to all people and by using the term God I do not

wish to rob him of his depth by implying that I understand him; it is

quite the contrary in fact. I believe Eckhart Tolle said it best in

regard to this phenomenon of pretending to understand something

by using labels:

"Words, no matter whether they are vocalized and made

into sounds or remain unspoken as thoughts, can cast an

almost hypnotic spell upon you. You easily lose yourself in

them, become hypnotized into implicitly believing that when

you have attached a word to something, you know what it is.

The fact is: You don't know what it is. You have only covered

up the mystery with a label. Everything, a bird, a tree, even a

simple stone, and certainly a human being, is ultimately

unknowable. This is because it has unfathomable depth."1

When I say God I mean just that unfathomable depth. Any

one who presumes to tell you they have figured out God is, is most

likely very arrogant, very blind, or very sick. I will tell you what I

believe I have discovered about God and what/who God is, but Im

only telling you what Ive learned and IF I have learned anything

1 Eckhart Tolle, A New Earth pg. 25

it is only the tip of the tip of the tip of the iceberg to such a finite

degree that mind couldnt even imagine the size of the iceberg

underneath.

Imagine youre in a world pre-technology. If there were 6

people standing around a large mountain, and there were large

rivers between the six sections of they were standing on, they may

take it upon themselves to name the mountain. The mountain

becomes the central figure of their day-to-day lives; it becomes part

of their culture for a long time. After some time someone develops

a boat! They travel to the other lands and they find that the

mountain is still there it is huge and seems to affect everyone on

earth. They begin to discuss this mountain and to the dismay of the

earthlings in the new land, the strangers speak of this mountain by

a different name, and talk about how it is shaped and the rivers that

run down this mountain, and the vegetation and so on. Much of it is

the same, but much of it is different, so they begin to argue fiercely.

After some unkind words they depart. As human kind progresses

and technology increases they never let go of the name they

attached the mountain long, long ago and the brave people who

explored it and told them about its wonders (prophets). The people

war and kill and hate each other for these disagreements and just

cannot seem to come to terms with each other because they

attached these ideas so deeply to who they are. All along, no one

ever realized that they were all looking at the same mountain,

seeing different sides, and just calling it different names.

It may seem silly with an example like that, but is not that

exactly what happens with all of these religious wars? The constant

disagreements, arguments, and strife? We all strive so much to be

right to satisfy our crying hungry egos, but I encourage you to let go

of the stigmas you have attached to these words and concepts such

as God. When I say God, Im including the mystery, which means

that there will always be room for more understanding whether

this God is Allah, Adoni, Krishna, or all of the above.

So when I use the word God I do not want you to think of

Christianity or the Bible, or Islam, or the Koran, or Krishna or

anything of that. I do not want to put a label on God that assumes

we understand him. Let him huge, glorious, and mystifying.

Commas, not periods

Another thing that you may be accustomed to when you

read or learn something is there being a period after every

sentence. Now, I dont mean a literal period, I mean a figurative

period suggesting that what you have just read, seen, or heard is

the truth. We live in a world that LOVES periods because it seems

to bring people an odd sense of security in what they know, and

somehow thinking that they have found the end of a certain truth

brings them this feeling. To me this is pure insanity. Not only is it

well known that science and what we know is changing, shifting,

and being re-written constantly, but things that we have

accomplished since the year 2000 and onward would have been

considered witchcraft and/or divine only 100 years ago! How is it

that we can be so arrogant as to presume a period after any truth

or fact? All truths are meant to be added to and are constantly in

a state being created, expanded, and integrated into other truths.

Even if you were somehow get to the end of some truth it will

have changed by the time you turn around to tell someone.

That being said I want you to know that I will be saying a

lot of things in this book that may seem like awesome information

to you, but please do us all a favor, dont make religion out of it! The

truths that I express in this book are meant to have commas not

periods. I want things to be added. I want people to question,

explore, and object. I want your opinions and creativity to play a

positive role as you read this book and take these concepts and

ideas into your day-to-day life. I want you to see new things that I

havent seen. So add the commas, think creatively, and hold the

periods. It was Rudolph Flesch who said, Creative thinking may

mean simply the realization that there's no particular virtue in doing

things the way they always have been done.

Also, putting periods after truths stop us from exploring

more if we believe those periods. Look at any great inventor they

were bombarded with arrogant, prideful pessimism at the time

they dared to dream the Wright brothers, Nikola Tesla (a

personal favorite), Martin Luther King Jr., Joan of Arc, even Jesus

Christ. All of these amazing people were despised, even hated by

the system because the system was so attached to their preexisting

thought paradigms that there was no room to learn or accept

anything else. It is an odd thing that our egos would go so far to

protect its pride as to attempt to smother even the greatest of

human beings. When we look back at these types of men and

women, in many cases they are considered heroes and the

founders of great movements! They introduced paradigm shifts in

our world that were so potent that they still have not been

undone and yet, they were told no. They were told what youre

trying to do wont work; its impossible. Its never been done

before. Just give up. And where would we be without them? We

seem to understand these things just fine when we read in on a

page, but rarely do we let sink into our hearts and become part of

who we are and how we live. We still find ourselves doubting

ourselves, fighting our dreams, telling ourselves oh thats not

realistic, or I need to be responsible. We still dont speak up

confidently when we have something real to say. We still question

our identities. How far we have fallen we were once titans we

were divinity, co-creating a beautiful reality with an utterly

AWESOME creator now weve been reduced to a complacent,

uninspired workforce and reality TV shows.

I hope reading this book marks the start of a new life for

you that is no longer defined by your fears or failures, but is

overflowing with love, vitality, and inspiration. No one can fill your

shoes. If we want to change the world, we change ourselves. Our

journey starts here.

Its about the journey not the destination

Im not sure where along the line we started being like this

but we seem to have lost a sense of appreciation for the journey of

life. Its all about the destination. Many times we spend our whole

lives looking forward to the next thing and never being fully

present in the now. When you read this book I want you to engage.

This is not a read so that I can I say I read it kind of book. Its not a

mystery thriller. This book is supposed to be a journey. It will be

asking a lot of participation, introspection, and effort from you. So

every step of the way is important and there is always something to

be learned if you keep your eyes and ears open to it. There is no

need to rush, no one is timing you, so take your time and interact

with the words and ideas. This is a journey that you are going to

want to have a pen, pencil, a notebook, a journal, and highlighters

out along the way. Its important to add significance to the parts of

the book that mean something to you and make and effort to

explore and remember them. Remember that every step you take

is a step you needed to get to where you want to be. So each step is

just as important as the destination. Make each moment of this

valuable.

The vital now is real; all other time is illusion and dwelling

in it robs life of its spark.2

2 There are no secrets by Wolfe Lowenthal pg. 123

Whats the purpose?

I am very passionate about the things Im writing about

in this book. Primarily I am writing this book to aid in

empowering people to create there own realities and begin to be

at peace with themselves and others around them living

completely out of love; once everyone realizes how intimately

connected our fates really are I dont think will be as quick to

hurt our brothers and sisters around the world. What Lao Tzu,

Jesus, Buddha and other spiritual leaders were trying to do was

not accomplished on a large scale. The messages of love, peace,

and inner discovery have been turned to tools of division strife

and hatred. Its like they gave us a hammer that we could build

entire new world with, and instead we started killing each other

with it. It has been used for killing for so long the general

population has forgotten that it was ever meant for something

else, and people many times grow to despise the hammer,

instead of the fear that drives its negative actions.

The idea is not to despise the hammer but instead to use it

constructively for the good of all. Our existence here on earth is

much like a spider web. We are all connected whether we realize

it or not and every action, thought, and emotion will inevitably

affect everyone else. We can no longer act as if we are just

looking out for ourselves as if we have no effect on other

people. Everything comes full circle and if you decide to take

advantage of people to get what you want it will come back to. On

a more subtle note, if you dont address your own character

flaws, it only hurt you and the people around you the same way.

Passive, apathetic neglect and blatant wrong doing have very

similar consequences.

The second reason is because I want MORE. I know

many of you have had a moment in your life where you said to

yourself there has to be more than this. I have been asking

myself what is out there for a long time with an undying passion

to find some glimmer of truth in a culture built on materialism,

sociology, and superficiality. I didnt really expect to find

anything honestly; I just couldnt live knowing that I didnt give it

everything I had to find it. And there in an unlikely place, I saw

it. I found it. I experienced something truly real and saw what I

believe our great spiritual leaders like Jesus, Buddha, and Lao

Tzu were trying to show us. I also saw that this is just the

beginning. The way we experience reality is not even the tip of

the shadow of an iceberg compared to what is possible. We live

like this is our life sentence. We have this tendency to take things

as they come like children. Children (younger children) arent

usually thinking of creative way to progress as a human being.

When they open the cupboard and the cereal is gone, they dont

start formulating ways to make the cereal at home and wonder

what the ingredients are and wonder if they can do it better; they

just yell out Mom were out of cereal!! And though we learn to

overcome certain behaviors as children as we move into

adulthood, there are still many, many, many times when we

open the empty cupboard and yell upstairs to mom for more

cereal.

May I present the idea that we are never supposed to

stop progressing? There is never a time when we will get to the

end of anything. The universe by its nature has infinite potential

and we are a piece of the universe and therefore also share this

infinite nature. Again, if youre a long time church goer or

monotheistic and you are offset by the fact that I say universe

instead of God, or if youre more of a new ager and the word

God has negative connotations that you cannot seem to detach

from at the moment, just feel free to insert your word of choice.

The word we use is immaterial; I cant stress that enough. It

would serve you well to disassociate the stigmas that are attached

to your perception of these words, and that make take time and

effort.

To create a new thought paradigm to dramatically

transform our conscious experience of this life to understand

God, the universe, and everything in between a lofty goal is it

not? Well of course it is. But it is only impossible if you believe it

to be impossible. The biggest drawback I think that many people

will have in implementing this book in a way that will produce

noticeable results in your life, is that it takes TIME. You will

probably have to make lifestyle changes and break many old

habits and thought patterns and those are NOT easy things to do.

If you think about it though, the easiest things to achieve usually

have the smallest reward. You will reap what you sow in this case

and every case. What you put into it is what you will get out of it,

but it may take more time than you would like it to although

some of it may be instant.

I have poured myself into this book. I mean for nothing

less than to be completely honest about who I am, what I think,

and where Ive been. I think all of those things play a crucial role

in understanding my perspective. Im not trying to trick you into

thinking a certain way. I want you to understand fully where Im

coming from and why I think the way I do. I think that will help

you interpret the material in a way that is more relevant to you. I

still ask that you approach this journey with an open heart and

mind. I hope very much that this will be a profound experience

for you that will ripple effect in your life. If you are going to

understand why I think the way I do then we are going to have to

go back some time and touch on parts of my past that Im not

proud of. The beginning of my destruction and the beginning of

my enlightenment are steps in the same journey towards the

same glorious goal. So lets start at the beginning.

The beginning of the beginning

The sound of my feet hitting the snow covered sidewalk

seemed to almost create heartbeat for these moments. I listened

to this heartbeat, and my heavy breathing. I was trying

desperately to block out the sound of my little sisters voice in my

head, being all too aware of the example I wasnt being and the

traumas she would soon face. I was sweating in the middle of

winter in Minnesota, mostly because I had been running for

about 5 miles in full snow gear. I dont know how long I was

running time was blurry. It was nighttime and cars would pass

occasionally with no idea what was going on in my world. I was

sure they all had somewhere very important to be and wouldnt

stop even if they knew. I didnt even care enough to take care of

myself, so how could someone else? My mind raced along with

my heart as though they were competing to see who could go

faster. My legs were numb from running. My emotions were

numb because I just couldnt figure out what to feel. I cant

believe Im actually doing this this is finally over it will all be

over soon I continued to run and listen to these thoughts

running back and forth in my head. I dont know if they would

make any sense now but everything seemed so set in stone in

those moments. I didnt have any options what was I

supposed to do? I saw a lake in the distance. It was familiar

place and seemed perfect to me to be there right now. I was

losing touch with reality and needed to stop running I just

didnt know how much longer I would make it.

I stood there on the edge of that lake with a whirlwind of

thoughts running through my head. I thought of all of things Ive

never done. I thought of the family I would never have, my kids

that I would never see running through the backyard and my

daughter that I would never get to push on a swing I thought of

the people that looked up to me and thought well of me would

they still find anything about my life inspirational? How could

they? In full snow gear I stood there; looking at the lake

blanketed in snow. It was so still and serene. I could hear no cars,

no birds, no noise really except for the slight cold breeze hitting

the nylon on my coat and occasionally whistling through the air.

It was freezing outside, but I couldnt feel the cold in the

slightest. My whole mind was occupied with my thoughts. How

could it come to this? Am I a coward? Does God see whats

going on right now? Who am I? What am I? No thought stayed

in one place for long, much like the pieces of dust in a tornado

they swirled frantically and uncontrolled. My heart was racing,

and my vision was going in and out I felt so weak. I dropped to

my knees and a tear ran down my faceone single tear. Any

more would be excessive I thought to myself; I chose this, and I

know what Im doing. 100 extra strength Tylenol at 500 mg a

pill and 100 generic brand ibuprofen at 200 mg a pill I knew it

would work because I did my research, and there was just no

turning back now. I wasnt scared to die. But I was terrified that

the love and inspiration that I gave in my life would turn to ash

in the light of my weakness overtaking me in this moment.

How did it come to this? Breathing deeply and slowly, I

felt myself disconnecting with the reality that I had come to

despise so much. There was a certain peace about looking out

over that lake knowing it would be the last thing I ever saw and

yet I still thought to myself

How could I let it come to this

This was me at 15 years old, utterly defeated by my

depression. I saw no way out; I saw no good things in life any

more. Anything good just seemed like a faint hope or idealistic

fantasy that just couldnt really happen. I tried and tried trick

myself into thinking that things were good, but my thoughts were

mostly dark and self-destructive. I truly believed deep, deep

inside of me that one really loved me. How could I think this? Of

course that wasnt true, but how could I have tricked myself into

this way of thinking to the point that I was ready to die, without

hope and alone? What I saw in this world was so distorted by the

lens I was wearing that could not see good things when they were

right in front of me. They could even be sitting in my lap, or I

could be holding them in my hands and I would deny their

existence. Somehow between then and now I have grown to be

head over heels in love with life and people in every way. I wake

every day excited to live and to see what this day will bring, when

before I woke up every day hoping I didnt survive the day and

went to sleep every night hoping I didnt wake up. It is quite a

dramatic story, which Ill save for a different book. How did this

transformation happen? What are the mechanics of it? And what

about those critical daunting questions that we all seems to ask

ourselves at some point in our lives Who am I? What am I?

Now, that wasnt the last time that I made an attempt on my life,

but something changed after I woke in that hospital bed and I

had survived. I thought to myself If Im going to live then it has

to be worth something otherwise why did I survive? In some

odd roundabout way, attempting suicide gave my life purpose

when I survived it. There were still so many thought processes

and negative destructive programs running in my mind that I

wasnt even aware of that I had to deal with yet. But I hunted

them down ruthlessly after that day. It took a great deal of effort,

a great deal of courage, a great deal of pain, and most

importantly, a great deal of help. I would not be where I am

today without the few people along the way who believed in me

right when I needed it the most. They were and in some ways still

are the air under my wings.

The things that Im going to talk about in this book may

seemingly be unrelated to the little story I just told you but if just

relax your mind and wait until the full picture is painted you will

see how intimately connected they are. I have been on a

desperate search for truth in my life that has lead me to many

places, to meet many people, and experience many things in a

very short time. If you are reading this book it is not an accident.

Most likely you either feel something changing here on earth or

you just have this insatiable desire for something real. Living in a

world (much, much more in the western world) that is

dominated by materialism, money, and fleeting, superficial,

instant gratification no doubt has left a bitter taste in your

mouth. Is this it? Is this all there is? It cant be and I know

many of you have come to the same conclusion that I have in that

respect, that this cant be what life is about. There has to be so

much more than this. What are we missing? Many people turn to

either one of two avenues (usually) to find lifes purpose if they

are set on discovering this elusive truth. They turn to science or

spirituality or religion3. What seems to be the problem with

science is that it is completely arbitrary, close-minded (in many

cases not all), and offers no significant reason for us being alive.

Science just looks at the facts and draws what seem to be

logical conclusions based on experiment and theory. Religion is

tricky because it is all man made, and in many cases void of logic

completely, where they ask you to relinquish your ability to think

and reason and replace it with faith. They think that our minds

are too small to possibly grasp the mysteries beyond our 3

dimensional existence down here so you must have faith, and not

necessarily try to understand it with our heads, but rather to

believe with our hearts.

So we always seem to be stuck in this conundrum of

choosing between our logic and faith, between our head and our

heart. This either/or way of thinking is quite prevalent in our

current global thought paradigm (especially in western culture).

We say that something is either true, or not true. This is black or

white. This is hot or cold. Both science and religion seem to

thrive on absolutism because it allows them to maintain the

integrity of their belief system, without pesky gray areas mucking

3 I believe spirituality and religion to be much different which is why I used both words. Ill get into that distinction a little later.

up their clear-cut boundaries. When we do this we unwittingly

prevent ourselves from creative expansion, progression,

innovation, and integration, which are extremely powerful

concepts and ideas.

So when it comes to the unknown and substance of the

spirit, do we relinquish our ability to think and reason and

replace it with faith? Or do we choose to believe that most

everything can be explained can be explained with science, and

that it is simply a matter of time? Do we have to choose one or

the other? A Danish physicist named Niels Bohr (who won the

Nobel Prize in 1922) once said, An ordinary truth is one whose

opposite is a falsehood. A profound truth is one whose opposite

is also a profound truth.

Im going to be talking a lot about profound truths in this

book, so please do yourself a favor and let your mental guard

down. Dont try to protect what you already think you know;

perhaps it is time for us to accept that no matter how much we

know, there will always be SO MUCH more to learn. It was

Claude Bernard who said It is what we think we already know

that often keeps us from learning. There is quite a bit of

information Im going to be presenting and it might not seem to

make sense at first because it is battling with what you already

know, but give it time and thought.

It may seem at one point that ideas that Im presenting

are contradictory, but you must allow them to come full circle in

order to see the whole picture. Profound truths are often simple

in function, but very intricate and complex in composition. Even

there you see a profound truth, that profound truths are both

simple and complex at the same time, whereas conventional

thinking may urge you to believe that profound truths are either

simple OR complex, but not both.

The paradigm is shifting. For some of you this is not new

information or shocking in any way because you can feel it or

have felt it for some time. If that is the case, this book may be a

little easier to stomach than it may be for other people. It will

certainly challenge the way that you have previously gone about

interpreting your life and reality. But I am asking you to keep

your heart and mind open as you go through this book.

Everything in it may not resonate for you personally, but if you

cannot believe something is possible you will never achieve it.

First you must become aware (perhaps by something like reading

this book), then you must believe (the hardest step, challenging

and perhaps breaking down old thought patterns), then you can

act you can create anew!

Awareness. Belief. Creation. These are the tools of progression.

SECTION 1: FROM THE INSIDE OUT.

Its not you, its me!

Have you ever looked at one of those optical illusion

books where they have a picture on a page that looks like just

lines or dots. The instructions will no doubt tell you to relax your

gaze and look at the picture until an image of some sort appears

like a dog or a tree. If you have gone through an entire book like

that Im sure

there are some

that you just

couldnt get.

Some of them

are pretty

difficult. At

some point you

get frustrated

and look at the

back of the book to see what the image is supposed to be and

then you look back that the same picture you had been staring at

and all of sudden you see it! You think to yourself Man how

could I not see that! Its right there! Thats so easy! From that

point on something really interesting happens when you look at

that picture. You ALWAYS see the image. You cant un-see it.

Once you know there is a dog there, you always see the dog when

you look at the picture no matter how hard to try to see the

picture how you saw it before.

This is a really interesting phenomenon regarding

awareness. Once you become aware of something, it is nearly

impossible to become unaware of it after that. You may forget4

in moments, but it will always exist in your mind in some form or

another. But the fact that you continue to see the image every

time after you look at this picture has to do with your eyes being

primed to see something5.

Take this image of circles for instance. I want you to look

at the picture for about 20 to 30 seconds.

4 I believe that we do not forget anything. I think that we just havent figured out an efficient way to retrieve our memories. There is a lot of evidence for this, but perhaps the most telling evidence is when an old memory is brought up that you didnt even realize you remember and then all of the details come back to you like it just happened the day before. The memories are in there; we just need to learn to access them at will. 5 For this reason people may tend to avoid knowledge (whether consciously or subconsciously) that challenges them or pushes them into a state of discomfort. When a commercial comes on about starving kids while someone is eating their dinner, a lot people will look away, chat over it, change the channel or something like that. Because we cant un-know that kids are starving due to the massive imbalance in the distribution of wealth that we casually enjoy the benefits of. Generally most people tend to not think about it or acknowledge it and sometimes they will actively push the knowledge out.

Ok now that you have done that, without looking back the picture

can you tell me how many times two dots of the same color touch

each other? Most likely you wont be able to do this without

looking back at the picture unless you have incredible powers of

observation. It only happens 3 times, twice with red and once

with green. If I had told you to look at this picture and pay

attention only to the places where 2 dots of the same color touch

each other, and then I had asked you that question it would have

been easy to answer the question. The flipside of this occurrence

is when you are so focused on one thing that you miss everything

else. Finding the balance of when to focus your gaze (mentally

AND physically) and when you relax your gaze is crucial.

In neuroscience and psychology they refer to the

phenomenon you probably just experienced as inattentional

blindness. Inattentional blindness can be defined as the failure

to notice an unexpected stimulus that is in one's field of vision

when other attention-demanding tasks are being performed.

This is something that magicians (entertainment magicians, not

wizards and witches) have down to an art and a science. They are

masters of distraction and priming your eyes to only see what

they want you to see. They can do the same tricks over and over

again right in front of you, if youre not told what to look for, you

may never find out how he doing it. Its incredible for

entertainment! Not so cool when it comes to our personal lives.

Eckhart Tolle said, "If you can recognize illusion as illusion, it

dissolves. The recognition of illusion is also its ending. Its

survival depends on your mistaking it for reality"6 Recognizing

the illusions in our lives is excellent way to "clear the mind" so to

speak. It all comes down to the first step of just becoming aware.

Our brains tend to behave like magicians much of the

time playing the same tricks on us our whole lives and we never

6 -Eckhart Tolle, A New Earth pg. 28

catch on because we never take the time to become aware of

whats actually happening. If something causes anger in us we

tend to blame the thing that sparked the reaction. We rarely

become angry, and then ask ourselves What is it inside of me

that is making me feel angry? We let our brains be the clever

magicians they are and direct our focus to whatever the catalyst

is outside of us instead of the source within us. Then your brain

will tell you that you it is THAT thing that is the cause of anger,

but lets think about this for a moment. Is that thing the cause?

Does that thing have power to cause anger against your will?

Imagine there are 2 people

driving. They are both driving on the

highway. Person A is driving with their

friend driving behind them and they

are both going to the same place.

Person B is driving by themselves on

their way home from work. Person As

friend comes from behind them and

speeds past them and playfully throws

up a middle finger7 and speeds down

the highway. Person A laughs and

speeds up. Person B sees the friend of

person A throwing up his middle

finger and believes that it is directed at

them. Person B gets angry. Person A

and person B see the exact same thing

and have 2 completely different

responses. They saw the same middle

finger. They experienced the same

visual stimulus. Person Bs brain tells

7 If youre not from America or are unfamiliar with what it mean to have someone raise their middle finger to you, it means in words fuck you and if not done playfully (and even sometimes when it is) it is considered very disrespectful and rude.

him, That person made me angry. If they wouldnt have flipped

me off I wouldnt be angry. But is that true? Is it the middle

finger that has the power to make this person angry against their

will? Or is it something inside the person? Is it rather something

about that persons perception of the situation? Obviously if you

think about it for a moment, the gesture itself does not have

arbitrary power to make someone angry against his or her will

otherwise they would have both become angry. So although it

may seem like the cause of the anger came from the outside, we

know from this simple example that is not true in the slightest

it has solely to do with the person experiencing the anger.

This is a something that your brain has down to a

science. It is a master of justification and deception when you

cannot control it. It is the ULTIMATE magician. Since person B

did not have his eyes primed to see the whole scenario, and

notice that the person was not even directing their middle finger

towards him, he reacted, blamed, and perpetuated his own state

of anger through ignorance and self-deception. The ego will do

anything it can to defend itself and reject anything that does not

instantly edify itself. It only wants to protect itself. In a

documentary put together by Corey Anton8 it was said, Since it

is in the very nature of our brain's left hemisphere to deny idea

that does not fit our current paradigm, the more attached we

are to a belief system, the less able we are to make conscious

choices for ourselves. In the example above, the belief system is

that the middle finger is directed towards you, and that it

somehow reflects badly on you, and because of those set beliefs

8 Professor of Communication Studies at Grand Valley State University. Past-Editor of the journal Explorations in Media Ecology (2008-2010), and Past-Chair of the Semiotics and Communication Division of the National Communication Association.

within you, you seem to relinquish your choice to control your

feelings and you just become angry against your own will as

your ego attempts to defend itself.

So this brings everything right back to home base. As

much as we like to point the finger (no pun intended) we

eventually have to start taking responsibility for our emotions

and actions at every level.

As you might imagine, this can get very complicated very

fast, because things are often not so simple and upfront like they

are portrayed in the illustration. A lot of times, we cant even

identify the middle finger or the catalyst that makes us feel the

way we do or respond the way we do to certain situations and

stimuli. This makes it very hard to make progress if we dont

know how to find what were looking for and sometimes dont

even know what we are looking for. The brain is a powerful self-

preservation mechanism, and left unchecked, it will do anything

it can to accomplish only that preserve your SELF and thats

it. This is not limited to your physical body. The brain has very

powerful self-preservation techniques embedded into our

physiology called reflexes. And just as we have physical reflexes,

we also have mental and emotional reflexes we most commonly

recognize as characteristics of our subconscious. The thing that

most people seem to be largely unaware of is that all of these

reflexes and habits are subject to our choice. Even your physical

reflexes are able to programmed to your specific wants and

beliefs. As a boxer and a martial artist Im well acquainted with

our ability to make our bodies do whatever we want them to do.

In the case of boxing especially, it is very important to learn to

overcome your reflex to blink when something comes at your

face. If you blink every time someone throws a punch, youre

blinding yourself to the next punch coming. A skilled boxer will

recognize if his opponent blinks too much and start feinting just

to make him blink so he can blindside him with another punch.

It happens quite often that we allow our brains to blink

so much that we only end up seeing only what we want to see.

This is a very dangerous way to live. We can go our whole life

being blindsided by our emotions and thoughts and never gain

control over our minds. The mind can be a very powerful tool if

we only learn to subdue it.

If we are content to allow our brains to dictate our lives

to us we are going to have very difficult unfulfilled lives. Our

minds eye is not often primed to see, recognize and differentiate

between our minds and who we really are. We have are on a

journey to become something extraordinary and discover the

infinite power within ourselves and it was Marcel Proust who

said, The voyage of discovery consists not of seeking

new lands, but seeing with new eyes. We have this brain,

this computer, to use, but it is NOT who we are. We are NOT our

brains. I cannot stress that enough. It is very important to realize

this and begin to see with new eyes. One of the biggest

differences between us and animals is this quantum leap

between our minds and our and spirits. Our spirits are much

different from the spirits of animals. If we only go back and

forth between mind and body then we are no different than

animals. This is like the cat that endlessly follows the laser light.

There would be a stimulus and then a specific reaction or set of

reactions that correspond to that stimulus. If we let this happen

then we are robbing ourselves of our conscious ability to make

choices and truly the essence of our humanity. We would be

going backwards from where we came from and become slaves

to our flesh. Unfortunately it is very common for people to live

this way. Many of us experience reality through the filter of our

bodies (senses), our minds then interpret what our bodies

experience through the filter of its own opinions and limited

knowledge, and then sends a signal back to our bodies to react

whether in word, action, a facial expression of some sort, etc. We

react so much!

This is something that is very profound that is happening

all of the time. We are teaching our minds and bodies what to

do with every action we perform and thought we have. All of us

have experienced this and probably experience this on a regular

basis. Have you ever had a conversation with someone when you

are tired and you are answering them without even thinking

about your answers? Or maybe you are just distracted? How

often when people ask how you are do you respond with, Im

good how are you? without even considering what is going on

with you at the moment? We can perform many actions and

interact with many people without ever involving our conscious

selves. I would argue that it is not good to allow your mind to

have this kind of control because then you are no different from a

machine running programs according to a set of rules. Then

when you need to make a choice that is different from the

programs that are already running it makes it much more

difficult. We do not want to instill these types of specific

programs deep into ourselves, but rather principles that allow us

to be adaptive to every situation and sensitive to what is going on

around us. If we can learn to be patient, watch, and anticipate,

we will no longer be slaves to our reactions. Moving from

reacting to choosing is a vitally important part of making this

shift in consciousness from our minds to our spirits. Your body is

nothing more than a conduit with which to experience a reality,

your mind is the commander (computer) of the body and your

spirit (you) should be the commander of your mind. It is a chain

of command; each part plays a very important, irreplaceable role

in our conscious experience of this life. But if the roles are

confused, it leads to chaos, unhappiness, stress, frustration, and

un-fulfillment.

Moving behind the keyboard.

I have referred to the brain as a computer several times

because that is what it is. Or, even more accurately said, a

computer is an artificial brain. Our brains have wiring, circuits

and pieces that perform specific functions just like a computer;

and also just like a computer, it is able to be programmed. This is

something that we dont often take into consideration in our day-

to-day lives. This is what Im trying to get at. We do not have to

live as slaves to our brains. If we allow our brains to be at the

forefront and simply react to things instead of making conscious

choices, it would be like being inside of a computer. You would

be like the energy that is being flung around and whipped back

and forth with every movement of the mouse and touch of a key,

and you have set the keyboard and mouse to your computer out

in the open for anyone to come and use as they please. You

simply react to whatever is typed in and wherever the mouse

decides to click. Everyone and everything has control over you.

You become like the cat that chases a laser light for hours never

catching it and every time that laser hits the wall or the floor

you react instead of making a choice. Many of us have never been

aware that we are living this way. Some of us may be aware that

we just react and have little control over our minds or emotions

and yet continue not attempting to remedy the situation. But

why would anyone choose to live this way? Because its easier. It

allows us to be like toddlers and not take responsibility for the

things we do and say and feel because we can blame it all on

genetics, brain chemistry, other people, and so on. This is your

choice to make. If you would like to live that way then that is

your choice of course and no one can take that choice away from

you, but along with making that choice, you have relinquished

your ability to make other choices and make progress9.

9 There is something to be said about extreme mental illnesses. There are some where chemistry is definitely not helping the situation. That does not mean that there is nothing we can do about it. I realize this is a touchy subject for some who have known people with extreme cases of some sort

What I would like to suggest to you is that life is much

better once you start taking responsibility and making choices

about who you want to be and how you want to live. We DO NOT

have to live like animals and infants slaves to our impulses and

emotions. I would like to suggest that you can get out of the

computer and sit behind the keyboard and start making

decisions about what the computer is going to do. This is a

process. For some people, it may be the hardest thing you have

ever done. You will have to be patient with yourself and others,

you will have to be humble to a degree that you are probably not

comfortable with, and for many, it will seem like you are going

backwards. If you have built a structure with cracks in the

foundation, you have to go all the way back down to the

foundation to fix it, many times destroying the entire building in

the process. It is through this process of breaking yourself down,

your structure, that you begin to understand yourself. You

begin to understand how you got to where you are, why you think

the way you do, why youre life has gone the way it has and so on.

As you knock down the walls of your mind, you will find that

some of the studs have rotted and or been infested with insects

or mold. You will see things in yourself that you will probably

despise, but you will also see how you got to that point. You will

see how your carelessness or lack of attention to certain parts of

your character has left them to rot and decay over time. Perhaps

you will see how things like your strong sense of independence

has hindered you from building deep, lasting, meaningful

relationships. Youll have to deal with things from deep in your

of mental disorder that was cured to a degree by medication of some sort. I dont think that there is no place for that sort of thing, but I it should not be our go to. It is much like being injured. If you break your leg and your leg lacks the ability to function on its own, the goal is not to put your leg in a cast for the rest of you life so you never have to use it again. But the cast be a very helpful tool in the healing process. If medication is used to remedy mental situations I believe they should be used the same way a cast is with the goal of eventually being able to function without it.

past that you didnt even remember caused you so much pain as

you get closer to the center. And everything that you have

struggled to ignore that your parents never tell you they love

you, that you lied about something really important to a best

friend, that you cheated on your significant other, that youre

utterly lonely and often have to fight tears as you lay your head

down at night to sleep, that you dont know who you are or who

you want to be, that you hate your job and it makes you

miserable, that you cant be honest with your family or friends

about who you are, that you most times feel neglected, ignored,

and under appreciated, that you often feel worthless, without

purpose, and you let your passions die whatever those things

are for you will all have to come out, and youll have to face them.

This process is going to tell you a lot about how you

have programmed your computer (your brain). You will see how

some programs are over working the computer or behaving like

viruses. You will see how your emotional programs may be self

destructive and self centered instead of loving, empathetic, and

compassionate. If you choose to find yourself no doubt you will

encounter these types of things. And it is often the pain and

difficulty of confronting ourselves, with all of our fears, faults,

and pride, that will stop us from stepping out of the computer,

sitting down at the keyboard and living a life that is truly

miraculous, transcending every iota of the mundane.

The following is a poem I wrote regarding this very

subject and think it would be fitting to put it in right here:

Dragon in the Tunnel

Something about this place, the look, the color, the smell, its just mundane.

Its normal and simple almost to the point of being maddening. I pace. I

think. I circle. I repeat.

There has to be more

So comfortable and complacent, this air is like poison but I breathe it in and

out again and again and again. Mind racing, peace fading, desire growing

but for what?

My heart beats to the sound of my feet hitting the ground as I circle this

tunnel, thinking, sweating, praying, pleading.

The past echoes in my ears, a faint song of defeat, of apprehension, of

mistrust, of toxic dreams. I choke on the sounds of the thoughts in my head,

circling, pacing, maddening.

Who am I?

Legs weak and unsteady I circle still waiting. I wait, but Im waiting in

circles for nothing. I breathe, I breathe heavy, mind racing, will breaking

these circles are maddening I have to get out.

With the sun at my back I stare into the tunnel and I feel the darkness

calling my name. I flinch, unsure of my resolve, I back peddle into the circle

and choke on the poisonous past in the air. I fall to my knees I cant

breathe who am I? What am I?

I stand to my feet with agonizing desperation I cant breathe this air

anymore.

With the sun at my back I walk into the tunnel the darkness consumes me

both inside and out. It grips onto my legs and my chest and my heart,

violently tightening its grip with each step I take. I walk, but by faith, by

passion, by fury I cant see anything, my real eyes are not open.

I breathe in deep all the smoke in the tunnel and it burns my lungs, but its

like breathing for the first time. Who am I?

I cant see the sun but I feel its warmth. I wont look back... I cant turn back.

The smoke gets thicker and I breathe deeply and slowly, embracing the

darkness and the fear in my veins. There in the darkness I see a dim a

glowing light and I quicken my steps hoping for the end. The smoke gets

thicker and thicker and I fall to my knees and crawl to escape the burn in

my lungs What am I?

Suddenly I feel an overwhelming heat on my face and a blinding light

obliterates the darkness but only for a moment. I look up and see this

majestic, fearsome beast. He is breathing slowly, heavily, with thick smoke

coming out of his nostrils. I choke and my lungs cry to me for mercy, but

there is just no turning back now. The beast looks down at me and the power

of his gaze melts my defenses. His overwhelming presence overtaking me

my eyes welling with tears. I stand to my feet with the last bit of strength in

my empty, suffering body. With tears in my eyes and all of the power my

lungs have left I scream at him, WHO AM I!!!

He lowers his head and looks in my eyes I stare back into his eyes like

flames ready to die, ready to suffer, ready to be. I lower my head ready for

whatever comes Im not afraid anymore you cant hurt me Im not

afraid. Im ready.

Glass shatters

I look up, and a soft light glows in the distance the other side of the

tunnel

I take a deep breath but it doesnt burn and smoke fills the tunnel as I

exhale I walk over the broken pieces of glass to the other side. I look down,

and I see my reflection eyes like flames.

Im going to let you chew on that a little bit. Ill come

back and explain it more detail later. You may already get it.

What am I??

So what is our spirit? If we control our body, and we

control our minds (to whatever degree you would like), then

what are we?? It is odd to think that you are behind your eyes

looking out through them like binoculars, but that is exactly what

you are doing right now. What is this thing we are? How do we

define what a spirit is or understand it? This question is huge

because if we begin to disassociate our sense of identity from our

bodies and our minds (which we should), then it leaves our

identity a mystery to an extent does it not? What am I? Identity

is an interesting word actually. It has Latin roots. Eckhart Tolle

explained it well when he said, "One of the most basic mind

structures through which the ego comes into existence is

identification. The word "identification" is derived from the

Latin "idem", meaning "same" and "facere", which means "to

make". So when I identify with something, I "make it the same."

The same as what? The same as I. I endow it with a sense of self,

and so it becomes a part of my identity."10

There seem to be 3 major dimensions to our identity,

which are our physical, mental and spiritual. The spiritual

10 Eckhart Tolle, A New Earth pg. 35

dimension being our actual person our actual self (this self is

connected to every other being and thing in the universe to some

degree use of the word "self" is merely to distinguish what you

have programmed into your personal portion of this universal

consciousness). We can choose our physical identity by what we

eat, and develop our bodies through training, exercise, and

conditioning. We can choose our mental identity by how we

choose to interpret things going on around us, what we read and

intake, our emotions (which can be programmed), and other

things. We can also choose our spiritual identity, which becomes

the fundamental nature of who we really are. Your spiritual

identity is much more difficult and time consuming to program,

although it is also affected by the mental and physical. They are

all meant to be working with each other (physical, mental, and

spiritual) to accomplish whatever goals you may have. Spiritual

development and identity are more difficult to achieve because in

most cases people are unaware of what their spirits actually

are the content the substance. What I have found is that the

spirit feeds on only two types of energy, and those energies are

love and fear; understanding the love/fear dichotomy is the key

to unlocking spiritual development. We seem to understand

what the mind and body are made of (to a degree) but have little

to no knowledge collectively of what the spirit is and how it

functions. That is something I will try to explain the best way I

know how, but no doubt is something that we all should be

actively discovering. One person never has all of the answers and

Im not exempt.

In regard the Tolle quote on identity there is a

process that one will go through and choices one will have to

make in regards to becoming the person that they want to be.

Unfortunately, this, like many other things we do, is done

unconsciously, meaning that we are not playing a conscious,

active role in becoming who we ACTUALLY want to be. It seems

to be happening to us arbitrarily, and one day we look back at

our life and wonder how we got to be the way we are right now.

The truth is that we have been making choices all along that were

turning us into something, but in most cases we have no

idea what that thing is until we become it, and even then the

unawareness is sometimes set so deep that we deny who we are,

and still believe ourselves to be someone that was lost long ago.

When Tolle says to make the same as I he is hitting the nail

right on the head. This is a reason why people often seek to

possess things. They allow things to become a part of there

identity and they are unwittingly trying to become great through

identification with things. The brain is a powerful deceiver as far

as identity is concerned. We often mistake our power hungry

brains for our actual selves. This self that the brain creates is

what we most often refer to as the ego, which is a shadow self

based on the impulses and arbitrary (sometimes conscious)

computations of the brain. The brain needs to be subdued. Its as

if its searching for its own sense of identity, but it is just a

computer. It lacks empathy, and the ability to truly love. We all

search for this identity, but it is held deep within us, and if we

dont understand who or what we really are, we will always

search for it in other places, and always fail. This desire cannot

be satisfied by anything finite.

So the obvious question is how. How do you do this?

How do you tell the difference between your mind and your

spirit? How is it that you can move behind the keyboard?

Awareness is the key. It may seem simple, and thats because it

is. Although, just because it is simple does not mean that it is

easy to put into practice. For this process I would like to use the

format of Awareness, Belief, Creation.

The first part is to become aware and begin to awaken to

who you really are. There are several way to accomplish this, but

I believe the effective way to do this is through meditation. The

best definition of meditation Ive heard was by a very good friend

of mine who said Meditation is the intent to be aware. So if you

sit yourself down to meditate it can look like many different

things and there are endless ways to meditate, but if you have not

been meditating before this (and maybe even if you have) you

will most likely find it very difficult to shut your mind up. This is

NOT a bad thing. This is actually the purpose as of now. You

want to become aware what goes through your mind and more

importantly why. You need to start recognizing how your mind

and emotions have been programmed. What types of things go

through your mind? Are you thinking about rent? Are you

thinking about how hungry you are? What about your significant

other or lack thereof? Does your mind repeat the same thoughts?

Do you have a really hard time sitting still? Why? Whats the

rush? Can you only think about being entertained? Are you

thinking about a TV show youd rather be watching, or a video

game youd rather be playing? Do you know why these thoughts

cross your mind? These are some important things to realize.

We do not often analyze why a thought crosses our mind

unless it is just really bizarre. Many of these thoughts cross our

minds multiple times a day so they are very familiar and do not

seem like a cause for alarm. Familiarity can easily stop things

from shocking us that probably should. In a poem I wrote called

Blind and Loving it I put it in a more direct way: Our

intentions bleed the truth so much that we have gotten used to

seeing red... so nobody flinches with the knife to their wrist.

In many cases we have gotten used to seeing red in

ourselves and the world so we dont have the same reaction we

do we it first happens. This is a subtle, gradual way that the brain

dulls our sensitivity so that it can more easily justify our actions,

thoughts, and emotions to ourselves. Things like war, and social

injustice should be utterly shocking and infuriating every time

we see it, but instead we have a thats just the way it is

mentality. It is that type mentality that perpetuates our suffering

and lack of progression. It allows us to be aware that millions of

people are being killed overseas in wars and just turn and look

the other way. It allows us to know that people are struggling to

eat right here in our own country as we scrape our extra food into

the trash without a second thought. This is why allowing our

brains (that are only concerned with self preservation) to dictate

our lives to us and have so much control can be so harmful to

ourselves and others. It lacks much perspective.

As we journey into ourselves through the process of

intending to be aware or meditating, we may begin to see

things we dont like. One thing you may also discover is that

many of your desires are not even intentional. Much of what you

may want and desire may be out of compulsion that you cant

explain. You may have strong feelings and urges that you cant

seem to control, whether it be food, solitude, sex, etc. The idea is

to start living a life that is intentional in every aspect. Everything

that we do, we should do intentionally. This is the difference

between infants and adults, between animals and humans,

between rocks and animals you can see how it goes further and

further down the chain. There are various degrees of awareness.

What makes us human is our profound, infinite ability to choose

and create our own reality. Anything you relinquish your ability

to choose to, you become a slave to. If you relinquish it to

cigarettes, you have become a slave to cigarettes; if it is to

peoples approval of you, then you are a slave to everyones

opinions around you, it could be your fears, appetites, emotions,

desires, and so on and so on. Im not saying that your appetites

and desires are bad things, but what I am saying is that you

should have them because they are purely intentional. They

should not control you.

So if you bring this back to home base, you realize that

all of these thoughts, addictions, unconscious actions, and habits

exist within yourself. So if you learn to become aware of them,

then you can move on to the next step in the process of freeing

yourself from them, which is believing that you can change them

if you so choose.

Intending to be aware: Mediation

You may be wondering how to meditate. That is the most

obvious next question. Let me start by saying that there is not

right or wrong way to meditate. Really it has solely to do with

your intentions. What are you trying to accomplish by

meditating? For where we are right now in this journey, our

intention is to be able to start differentiating between our mind

and our spirit and taking some control over what our mind is

doing, rather than allowing it to operate in spite of us rather than

because of us. And remember that all that is necessary to

become aware is to have the intention to become

aware. So Im just going to give you some simple instructions

that may help you get started. This is just my opinion based on

the things Ive learned. By telling you this I am not condemning

any other method of meditation or spiritual practice. Truly there

are as many ways to do this as the imagination can conceive.

Step 1: Find yourself a quiet place where you wont be

interrupted. Where you do it is not as important right now as it is

for you to be comfortable. Sit as still as you can and be as

comfortable as you can without having to adjust the position of

your body. Avoid lying down, because it is quite easy to fall

asleep even if you didnt think you were tired.

Step 2: Set small progressing goals. If you have not meditated or

perhaps are not used to not doing something then you may find

it very difficult to sit in one place for a long time. Dont be

impatient with yourself. Dont get frustrated. All goals are surely

accomplished one patient step at a time, and truly one step at a

time is not too difficult. So set a timer or an alarm; if you can buy

one that would be ideal. It is best not to use your cell phone, as it

can be distracting. Start with something like 5 minutes. If that

even seems like too much start with 1 minute and increase it each

time by 30 seconds. Once you get to about 15 minutes hold there

for a while (unless you have the time and patience to do 30 or

more) and make a solid habit out of it. What you may find in

time is that when your alarm goes of you wont want to stop. It

can be an incredibly cleansing, relaxing experience.

Step 3: Be aware of your posture. It is important to keep your

back as straight as you can and push up with the top of your head

to take the pressure off of your neck and spine. You want a good

clean energy flow going through your body and your posture

plays an integral role in that. Even when you were in elementary

school, what did the teacher always tell the students? Sit up

straight and pay attention. There is actually a reason why sitting

up straight helps with that and youre going to want to be able to

focus.

Step 4: Breathe deep. I want you to really focus on your

breathing. Most of the time when we breathe we breathe short

shallow breaths allowing excess air to rest in the bottom of our

lungs and it gets cycled out very slowly. Youre going to want

breathe all the way in deep down, pushing your stomach out first

and the slowly filling your lungs from the bottom to the top.

Focus on the feeling of the air coming into your lungs and the

feeling of exhaling. You can relax your breathing after about 5

minutes or so if you would like. Youll start to feel yourself go

into a trance like state and/or just be very, very relaxed most

likely. You can still focus on your breathing just to help keep

yourself relaxed, but they dont have to be huge breaths every

time.

Step 5: Dont resist. Many people tend to think of meditating as

trying to push out all of your thoughts in order to quiet your

mind. Anyone who has attempted this knows how difficult this is.

I heard what I considered to be a superior method one time. It

was to not try to push out anything not the noise, not the

thought, or feelings, or discomfort. Simply be aware of these

things within yourself. Let them move freely about in your mind

without you trying to correct or alter them in any way. We are

trying to get to the bottom of ourselves, so it is important to be

aware of all of the thoughts that are happening within us and

address them inquisitively. Relax your mind and intend to be

relaxed.

Step 6: Journal everything. I highly recommend getting or

making a journal for this specifically. Dont just use scrap paper

or the back half of a notebook or a 3 ring binder. If you are

taking this seriously, one thing that I consider to be vitally

important is that you document everything that you experience

while you meditate. Write down all of the feelings, all of the

thoughts, how it made you feel to do it, how difficult it was, if

there were any images that flashed in your mind, people you

frequently thought of, etc. What you may begin to notice after

doing this for a short time, is that there are many patterns in

your thoughts, emotions, and images that may come to your

mind while you meditate. If you write everything down it is

MUCH easier to see the patterns and start to realize how your

mind is operating. Once its sitting in front of you on paper it is

much easier to make choices about what you want to do about it

and how to move forward.

Step 7: Reflect. Take what you experienced inside of you in that

quite time with yourself to the outside world and to you day-to-

day interactions. If you thought of relationship a lot, think about

the things that went through your head when you see that

person. If you thought about your discontentment with your job,

be aware of that while youre at work. What makes you not like

your job? Dont just say to yourself because its boring or

because I dont like the people I work with or because its

stressful. The idea is to discover the root within yourself. Why is

it boring? What would you rather be doing and why? Why dont

you get along with those people? Why can you not see past their

faults and love them? Why is it stressful? Are you unable to take

life one day at a time? Do you worry yourself sick and tired with

deadlines and expectations that come and go whether you worry

about them or not? Take that quiet time within yourself, and

extend it to your life outside of you.

I think I can

Nearly every action we will ever preform in life as

humans is based on what we believe the outcome will be. It is

certainly becoming an increasingly rare occasion where someone

will do something not knowing what will happen. Think about

it. If you didnt believe you would remember one word in this

book would you read it? If somehow someone convinced you that

you that once you closed the back cover that you would forget

everything you just read, would you still read it? Well if you truly

believed it then you probably wouldnt. The interesting thing

about this is that, if someone convinced you of that right now,

and you read it anyways, you would probably still remember

plenty from the book (although perhaps not as much). Our whole

life, all of our decisions are based on what we choose to believe is

true, and what we choose to believe is possible. Every day, all

day, you are putting your faith on display. The way I define faith

is simply an action inspired by a belief. You lower your body

down into a chair because you believe that it will stay standing

when your weight hits it. You turn the keys to your car in the

morning to go to work because you believe that will make the car

start. On a deeper level, you may seek to make more money,

because you believe it will make you happy. You believe you have

to have a girlfriend or boyfriend or significant other because

without them you will be lonely. Think about everything you do

and say throughout the day there is a belief of some sort behind

it and well call the action that follows faith.

This is not a bad thing. The idea is not empty yourself of

beliefs; it is choose what those beliefs are. Remember we are

trying to move to a more intentional life. We want to become

aware of what our spirits are (who we are) and how they

function. Again, this will take work, and many times lots of

reprogramming. In the last section you read I talked a lot about

becoming aware of yourself in different ways. If you are not

aware of something, why would you try to change it? Obviously if

you were unaware you would do nothing, which is why it is SO

important to make the decision to be very aware of what is going

on inside of you. You have to slow down a lot of times to realize

what is happening inside of you. In the western world we live a

life dominated by the clock and most of us seriously lack

patience. I know this very, very well. Anyone who knew me

growing up knew lacked a lot of patience. I was to things

happening very quickly and making things happen quickly. I was

a little fireball. Although I still am Im just intentional about

what I do with my flame. I have patience now; at least I would

like to think that I have a lot more patience now I will tell you

that it takes a lot of patience to write this much! The funny thing

is Ive always thought about writing books, but I always knew I

couldnt do it because I knew I didnt have the patience. I was

more of that mindset before that we just are the way we are.

Now I am fully aware of the power of a conscious mind, but of

course Im still learning.

Once we begin to slow down, we begin to see and notice

things about ourselves, which is one of the reasons I suggested

that particular method of meditation that I did. After you become

aware of things that you want to change, you then have to

BELIEVE that you can change them if it going to work. As far as

the awareness, belief, creation process goes, this may be the

most difficult to put into application. How do we change what we

believe? Beliefs are often deeply rooted within us. If you think

about the analogy I gave in the last chapter of having a building

with cracks in the foundation? And about rebuilding the

structure? So if we continue with this analogy, imagine that

meditating allowed you get down to the foundation of yourself.

Now you are there and you see the cracks, the missing parts, the

mistakes and imperfections in the architecture. You can see a lot

that you didnt know was there so now what?

If we were standing next to each other in your yard

looking at a giant tree, and I gave you a pocketknife and told you

to cut it down, you would probably look at me like I was crazy.

But I would look back you and say, I told you this tree was going

to be a problem a long time ago years and years ago when it

was much smaller I told you to cut it down. Now that you have let

it go like this, it is threatening to destroy your house because of

the roots destroying the foundation of your house. You might

look back at me not happy, but you know that Im right. It might

take you months to cut down that tree with a pocketknife, but

eventually it will fall. In the book The greatest salesman in the

world there is an amazing quote regarding this process (the bold

lettering and underlining are mine):

The prizes of life are at the end of each journey, not

near the beginning; and it is not given to me to know

how many steps are necessary in order to reach my

goal. Failure I may still encounter at the thousandth

step, yet success hides behind the next bend in the road.

Never will I know how close it lies unless I turn the

corner.

Always will I take another step. If that is of no avail I

will take another, and yet another. In truth, one

step at a time is not too difficult.

I will persist until I succeed.

Henceforth, I will consider each day's effort as but one

blow of my blade against a mighty oak. The first blow

may cause not a tremor in the wood, nor the second,

nor the third. Each blow, of itself, may be trifling, and

seem of no consequence. Yet from childish swipes the

oak will eventually tumble. So it will be with my efforts

of today.

I will be liken to the raindrop which washes away the

mountain; the ant who devours a tiger; the star which

brightens the earth; the slave who builds a pyramid. I

will build my castle one brick at a time for I know

that small attempts, repeated, will complete

any undertaking.

I will persist until I succeed.

If you want to get on an accelerated track to

reprogramming your brain and taking control of your mental life,

I HIGHLY recommend this book. It is probably the best book Ive

ever read, and if you follow the instructions precisely it will

certainly facilitate a profound change within you.

Going back to the tree, this is a metaphor for a belief in

this example. There are several ways to tear out the tree and

plant a new one, but all of them will take time. First of all, you

have to believe that it is possible, and one step below believing if

you just cant believe is hope. Hope is very powerful because it

keeps our dreams and desires from collapsing, but it maintains

rather than progresses you (in most cases) and faith is certainly

superior if you are trying to accomplish specific goals. Hope does

not necessarily have an action that accompanies it, whereas faith

always does. Once you believe it is possible you have to then

begin acting on that belief.

When are you going about this it is very important to

keep in mind that you are not running from what you dont want

to be, you are going towards what you do want to be. There

is a HUGE, very important difference. One instance is motivated

by fear and the other by love. Im going to get into love and fear

based consciousness later but it is of vital importance that you

that recognize the difference between making decisions out of

fear and out of love. You can equate making decisions out fear to

running from the darkness, and making decisions out love as

turning on the light. Why would you run from the darkness when

you can just turn on the light?

So lets start to get some ideas on how to do this. Imagine

the synapses (connections) in your brain as branches on a tree. If

a branch starts to grow, or a thought starts to manifest, it will

continue to grow if it goes unchecked. When a negative or

unwanted branch, thought, or idea starts to arrive you have to

contest or challenge it in some way or else it will just continue to

grow. Take for instance if you have a problem being honest.

Someone confronts you about something and you have to make a

choice in that moment whether you will be honest about it or not

(although sometimes you have lied so much that you dont even

think twice, you just spout out words). When the choice arrives

there will be a series of thoughts or feelings that accompany it.

Perhaps your logic arises with a plethora of reasons to lie about

whatever this thing is. The longer you let those things go in your

mind unchecked they create a very large tree very fast, and the

harder it becomes to cut it down so to speak. The idea is to

catch it right away before it gets too big. This is where that

awareness we are developing through mediation becomes very

useful. You may remember these thoughts and feelings from your

times meditating and have written them down so as soon as the

thought comes up, you remember it and recognize it. It is like the

analogy I gave previously about looking at the tree in your yard.

The yard is like your brain, and the tree like the thoughts or ideas

in your brain (something also to consider is that if you have a

given amount of energy to work with, and a tree gets very large, it

will be leaching nutrients and

energy from other

trees/thoughts in the yard. It

will be more difficult to plant

other ideas with one negative

thought or idea taking up so

much space and energy.)

So if you look at the

diagram of our lie tree here,

you can see what Im talking

about. Initially there is