Gavilan College Writing Center 2016-2017

The Writing Assistant Handbook

“Most people have had bad experiences with writing. They have come to dislike it or fear it and usually they avoid it. Few people write by choice. Nevertheless, though good writing takes hard work and skill, I insist on some hopeful truths .... It is possible for anyone to write things that others will want to read. When people manage to say what they really mean and to get themselves into their writing, readers tend to have the experience of making contact with the writer––an experience that most people seek.”

––Peter Elbow“Everyone Can Write:

Essays Toward a Hopeful Theory of Writing”

The Writing Assistant Handbook

Table of Contents-Basics Mission Statement........................................................page 1

Programs & Services....................................................page 1

The Eight Principles.....................................................page 2

Terms of Employment..................................................page 3

Roles & Responsibilities..............................................page 4

Priority Uses................................................................page 5

The Protocols The Inside/Out Approach.............................................page 6

“Openers” Tip Sheet.....................................................page 7

Responding to Grammar Concerns..............................page 8

Giving Language Back.................................................page 9

Working with Small Groups........................................page 10

Think Aloud.................................................................page 11

Workshop Agendas......................................................page 12 Heart, Plus, Invitations & Questions ..........................pages 13-14

Piñeda Protocol............................................................page 15

Hutchins Protocol.........................................................page 16

Hot-spots Energize Revision........................................pages 17-18

Collaborative Assessment Technique...........................page 19

Writing Assistant Inquiry Circles.................................page 20

More Tools Cobblings.....................................................................page 21

Feedback Assessment Sheet.........................................page 22

Session Notes...............................................................page 23

Revision.......................................................................page 24

Gavilan College Writing Center 2016-2017

Workshop Notes Form.................................................page 25

Essay Patterns..............................................................page 26

Revision Worksheet.....................................................pages 27-28

Proofreading................................................................pages 29-30

Sentence Types............................................................pages 31-32

Additional Resources...................................................page 33

Website & Links..........................................................page 34

Tools for Readers Reading Diagram........................................................page 35

Quote Journal..............................................................page 36

KWL+ Chart................................................................page 37

Questioning Levels.....................................................page 38

Forms of Consciousness & Varieties of Power...........pages 39-40

Understanding Session Tip Sheet.........................................................page 41

Differences Between Assistants & Editors..................page 42

What is a Writing Center..............................................pages 43-44

Contact Information Contact Information for Writing Center Staff..............page 45

Basics

Programs & Services

Our MissionThe Gavilan College Writing Center serves the campus community by fostering, celebrating and encouraging writers and the varied and multiple purposes and audiences that writing serves.

The center assists writers in identifying and developing tools and strategies to meet goals for their writing both in and out of the classroom. Likewise, the center collaborates with instructors in identifying and developing best writing teaching practices across the curriculum. It offers space for exploration and reflection on a wide range of written material, promotes an appreciation for literature and literacy, and cultivates diverse writers’ voices and the communities that nurture them.

WRITING ASSISTANCE & CONSULTATION

l Drop-in & by appointment, five days a week, beginning at 8 a.m., up to twelve hours a day

COMPUTER ACCESS & STUDY SPACE FOR ALL GAVILAN STUDENTS

l Drop-in five days a week, beginning at 8 a.m. , up to twelve hours a day

SUPPLEMENTAL INSTRUCTION FOR ENGLISH CLASSES

l Peer tutors for up to 20 hours a week per sectionl Serving English 420, 440, & 250 labs

PROFESSIONAL DEVELOPMENT &

FACULTY SERVICES

l Computer, printing, phone access & meeting space

ON-GOING TUTOR TRAINING &

RECRUITMENT

l English 12A-D, providing 18 hours of training before the fall semester begins & ongoing training thereafter for Writing Assistants and other Writing Center employees.

PUBLISHING OPPORTUNITIES

l Journals & newslettersl Writing contests

WHO WE ARE: WHAT WE DO

WRITING EVENTS & VISITING WRITERS & SCHOLARS

l Writing contests & open-micsl Literary club meetingsl Literary workshops, performances, & events with esteemed writers & scholars

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* From the Academic Skills Achievement Program of California State University, Monterey Bay

Gavilan College

WRITING CENTER5055 Santa Teresa Blvd., Gilroy, CA 95020 (408) 848-4811 http://www.gavilan.edu/writing

EIGHT PRINCIPLES FOR WRITINGCONSULTATION & ASSISTANCE*

1) Our goal is to improve writers, not individual pieces of writing. We suggest strategies that writers can use now and in the future.

2) We view writing problems as solvable. While we recognize that writing can be demanding and discouraging, we offer encouragement and information to help writers move forward in their writing development.

3) We facilitate writing by identifying manageable points of revision. We set priorities based on a writer’s current needs in each session. We cannot address every issue or problem in a piece of writing.

4) We aid writers in coping with a variety of writing contexts. We help writers analyze an assignment and recognize common writing conventions, so that they may become flexible writers within the academy.

5) We model problem-solving for writers. We readily admit when we do not know the answer to someone’s question and pride ourselves on finding answers in handbooks, dictionaries, and from other writers.

6) We see and facilitate writing as a series of choices. We respect and encourage writers to take responsibility for those choices at all levels in their texts. It’s the writer’s role, not ours, to make decisions about a text. Accordingly, we do not write on the writer’s papers.

7) We assist writers by being readers. In doing so, we demonstrate how an audience makes sense of the choices a writer has made.

8) We do no speculate on the grade a piece of writing might receive, nor do we discuss assigned grades. Our position as consultants in the college community prohibits negative comments about teachers, papers, responses and assignments.

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GAVILAN COLLEGE WRITING CENTERTerms of Employment for Tutors/Writing Assistants/Writing Consultants*

TO MAINTAIN YOUR POSITION TO LOSE YOUR POSITION

Arrive at work on time with a positive attitude, ready to work, demonstrating professionalism and compassion.

Treat your colleagues, students, supervisor/program coordinator, visitors, and all faculty and staff with respect, dignity and professionalism.

If you commit to a task, complete it.

Support the work of the Writing Center and its participants to the best of your ability and with integrity.

Communicate any problems with clarity and timeliness.

When you are unclear about a situation, issue or problem, ask for help.

Successful ongoing participation and/or completion of English 12.

Model best learning practices for other writers and writing instructors by demonstrating academic honesty and integrity within and beyond the Writing Center.

Honestly report the number of hours worked.

Arrive late and unwilling and/or unable to perform assigned tasks.

Fail to call if you are going to be more than 10 minutes late.

Fail to call and/or attempt to arrange for a substitute on days you are not able to complete scheduled hours.

Fail to successfully participate in and/or complete the Writing Center training program.

Act with disrespect toward your colleagues, students, supervisor/program coordinator, and/or visitors.

Keep problems to yourself.

Act in an inappropriate or coercive manner toward program participants.

Compromise the center’s work by hindering its goals through behavior, attitude or deed.

Violate Gavilan College’s academic honesty policy by committing plagiarism or other acts of academic dishonesty or cheating.

Over report the number of hours worked.

* These guidelines may be revised with notice as needed.

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ROLES & RESPONSIBILITIES

For On-Duty Drop-in Assistant Be ever-ready to greet walk-ins by crossing room Be in a position where door is visible to you at all times, fully committed to greetings role Maintain quiet in the room by helping regulate the noise levels of others in a polite and respectful manner Only take a break if another Writing Assistant is in designated greeting role Avoid being at the center of conversational circle of off-duty Writing Assistants Call Writing Center AND and any Instructors you are assigned to work with in advance of absences, and arrange for your own substitute Periodically circle room and straighten it, disposing of trash, and putting things away

EXPECTATIONS & GUIDELINES FOR ON-DUTY WRITING ASSISTANTS

All Writing Assistants Clean up your own messes in a timely manner Store backpacks and other bulky items in Writing Center office and out of public areas

For On-Duty Lab and Classroom Assistant (SI) Be ever-ready to interact with instructor and students in lab or class Be a model of an engaged, self-starting student Be on time Show initiative with instructors, helping out even when not given specific instruction Approach students even when one is asking for help: Sample openers: “Tell me about what you’re working on.” “What are your plans for this assignment?” “What do you like about what you’ve written?” Be in a position where students are visible to you at all times Avoid engaging off duty Writing Assistants Call Writing Center AND and any Instructors your are assigned to work with in advance of absences, and arrange for your own substitute Periodically circle room and straighten it, dispose of trash, and put things away

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PRIORITY USES OF THE WRITING CENTER(in order of emphasis)

l One-on-One peer tutoring

l Lab and classroom visits

l Solitary writing, reading, and research activities

l Meeting Space for faculty and staff

l Meeting space for students to support each other, and study in small groups

l Meeting space for writing, and related events, clubs, and functions

l Space for quiet, academically appropriate socializing

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The Protocols

THE INSIDE OUT APPROACHFor Effective Writing Response Sessions

Understanding the Assignmentappropriateness of approach

Focus of the Paper (Thesis)interesting & central idea

Organizationconnectedness of paragraphs to one

another & to thesis

Developmentsupport of statements & claims

Surfacepunctuation, syntax, grammar & citation

Diction & Styleword choice, sentence variety &

conciseness

Typing Errors

Gavilan College

WRITING CENTER 5055 Santa Teresa Blvd., Gilroy, CA 95020 (408) 848-4811 http://www.gavilan.edu/writing

Focussing Prompts18 strategies to get writers talking

What is the assignment?What do you want to say?How do you want to accomplish it?

Sum up your paper in a sentence?Does your point fit your purpose?

Create a visual diagram of the piece.Use whiteboards and colored pens to “see” the paper.Let’s talk things out...What does this mean?

Can you read the paper out loud?(Take notes + ?)What else can you tell me?Push for detail: “You say the dog is cute. Why?”How does this paragraph connect to your idea

Use writers’ reference tools.Note the academic rule or convention, then ask, “How can you fix this?”

How many little words can you get rid of in each sentence?What happens if you use clauses to connect these ideas?Focus on active verbs.

Have the writer start at the bottom of the last page and read slowly back to page one, looking at each word.

“OPENERS” TIP SHEET FOR LAB & SI ASSISTANTS:EIGHT POWERFUL CONVERSATION STARTERS READERS CAN USE TO HELP WRITERS

What are you working on?

What’s your plan for this assignment?

Take me on a tour of your essay.

This is what I get out of your piece.....

At the heart of this piece for me.....

While you were reading, I heard.....

It reminds me.....

I noticed .......

Tell me what you’d like to do next.

How’d you like to meet and talk about your writing every

week?

Statements of evaluation are less helpful to writers than we’ve been led to believe. Readers often help most just by listening, restating what they hear and being very, very specific, pointing to a word, sentence or section when talking to writers about their work.

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“Trying to understand the logic behind a writer’s errors is perhaps the most important help you can offer .... Your most powerful question for the writer is, ‘Why did you make that choice?’”

––The Allyn and Bacon Guide to Peer Tutoring

1) Look for patterns of errors (i.e. their for they’re, possessives without apostrophe’s, comma splices and other sentence boundary issues etc...)

2) Ask, “Why did you make that choice?”

3) Help the writer recognize the error by categorizing or classifying it.

4) See if he or she already knows how to fix it.

5) Explain the specific rule that applies and refer to a handbook and/or dictionary and help the writer fix the error.

6) Find another example and ask the writer to apply the “rule” correctly and so on until the new pattern is learned.

7) Equally importantly, find examples where the writer has already applied the rule correctly.

Responding to Grammar Concerns

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GIVING LANGUAGE BACK*

Choose a facilitator

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Facilitator: Open the space(Breath together; acknowledge writer’s courage)

Writer: Reads work slowly maintaining “music” of sentences

Responders: Listen closely, writing down whole phrases word-for-word, capturing as much language as you can

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Facilitator: Open space again(Thank the writer; breath together; encourage writer to feel self in chair, in room, in language when words and phrases

returned)

Group members: Take turns giving language back, reading forcefully, with gusto and affection, as if the words and

phrases in the notebooks are already printed in a book and already beautiful, like a poem

Writer: Remains quiet; breaths words and phrases back into the body as they return

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Facilitator: Open space again; asks writer: What happened? What did you notice about your words and phrases as they

returned to you?

Writer: Responds to the experience of hearing their words and phrases return via other’s voices

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* A version of this protocol was first developed by Andy Couturier of The Opening.

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What did you notice specifically? Words? Sentences? Images? Sections? Opinions? Ideas? Essay patterns?

How did the writing make you feel? What struck you in the heart,

the head, the mind, the body?

Where could the writer say more?

What pictures went through your mind?

What did you relate to? What more would you like to know?

What did it remind you of?

Where did you make a connection?

What did you taste, smell, hear, or touch?

In your own words, what was the piece about? What questions did it raise?

THINK ALOUDThe goal of workshop is for writers to leave willing and excited to return to the work.

Group members should respond to a piece with gentleness and encouragement.One rule of thumb: Say nothing dishonest! Say nothing unkind!

Each group member must honor the writer’s willingness to share the words. To show respect, actively engage in the discussion with specific examples from the text.

While discussion is taking place, writers remain quite but should feel free to take notes.

RESPONSE STARTERS

Facilitators and group members can use these questions to spark discussion.

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List names of everyone in your workshop:________________________________________________________________________________

Each writer will have about 15 minutes focused on their piece, which means you have only five or so minutes to discuss points one and two on the agenda below.

WORKSHOP AGENDA

I Choose a FocusAs a whole group, decide what you would like to focus on during your workshops sessions. You might, for example, decide to focus on structure and organization; developing a strong thesis state-ment; or providing vivid evidence and detail to support a thesis that wakes up a reader’s intellect and senses.

Workshop is probably not a good time to focus on grammar, spelling or punctuation. Feel free to make an appointment with a Writing Assistant, if you want more feedback in this area.

II List Qualities As a group, decide what qualities are associated with a piece of writing that’s effective in the area(s) on which you’ll focus.• For example, if you decided to focus on vivid detail, you would make a list of the qualities that a paper with “good” vivid detail includes.

III Read the Work AloudAsk the first writer (or another member of the group) to read his or her piece aloud. Once reading is finished, the writer must be silent until the group is finished talking about the piece.*

IV What Audience Got Out of It (Non-evaluative feedback)After the writer is finished reading, the rest of the group says what they got out of the piece and what they understood it to be about.

V Strengths of the WorkThen the group lists some of the strengths of the piece, being sure to give examples.

VI Reflect on Focus AreaNext the group turns its attention to the area of focus, reflecting on what elements it shares with other pieces of writing effective in that area.

VII Invitations to RevisionNext the group might point out what elements can be added in order to create an even more effective piece of writing.

VIII QuestionsFinally the writer has an opportunity to ask the group clarifying questions.

* A special note to writers: This is your piece of writing. Only you can decide what changes to make in your piece.

HEART, PLUS, INVITATIONS & QUESTIONSRESPONSE GROUP PROTOCOL

Think back to the kinds of comments that are most helpful to you as a writer––the kinds of comments that keep you engaged in the process with a desire to return to the page and further develop and shape your ideas. Think about what helps you as a writer and researcher because you are now responsible for helping another writer and researcher see their work with fresh eyes. It takes a spirit of generosity and rigor to do this well.

In my experience, phrases like “good” and “bad” rarely help a writer move forward. But even something as simple as telling a writer what you got out of their piece can help them see the connections readers make with their ideas.

Most importantly be sure to be specific when giving comments. Point out precise pages, paragraphs, sentences and words that best illustrate your point. Give lots of details and examples to help the writer understand how and why you read their piece the way you did. Seminar responses are good training for this because you are already used to referring to exact words and passages. If, for example, as a reader you wanted more explanation in the essay you might begin a sentence like this: “In paragraph two you wrote, ‘Turntables are the only instrument that lets you touch the music.’ That’s a beautiful image and a wonderful phrase, and I want more. I’m wondering how that works. How does a turntable feel? Literally, how do you touch the music?”

Look below for a guide to the shape your response dialogues should take.

The writer must remain silent until step five. Even if the writer has information that could easily clear up a misunderstanding, the writer must remain silent until point five.

I What’s at the heart of this piece? Take turns telling each other what you got out of the writer’s piece. Don’t let the writer respond to your conversation. In fact, it sometimes helps to talk about the writer as if they weren’t there. This allows him or her to really take in what you are saying in new and unexpected ways.

Next, answer the question: What’s at the heart of this piece for you, the readers? In some sense, this question asks you to tell the writer what you recognize as the focus of the piece. It’s OK, even preferable if different readers have different perspectives and disagree about the answer to this question.

II Strengths Point out places where their piece is really working. Go page-by-page and paragraph-by-paragraph. Be specific and choose at least two or three things that really stand out to you. Think about the way they phrase things, the words they choose, the images they created and/or the way they’ve organized their ideas. Keep reading the piece until you identify these strengths. Every piece has at least two or three strengths.

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III Invitations for Revision Point out places where you got confused or want more information. Where might the writer slow down and build their ideas or get you more emotionally involved by using things that appeal to your senses: the things you can see, smell, taste and feel? Where might they get more factual and build support for their ideas? What other rhetorical modes might they use to expand their ideas and help the reader get more into it? Again go page-by-page and paragraph-by-paragraph. Be specific but do not choose more than two or three things. Keep reading until you find something you think could work even better with a little more work. Every piece has such places.

IV Questions Now, ask the writer any questions you have for them based on their draft or things you might like to know about how they conducted their writing, research or began to give their essay a shape. Ask them questions writer-to-writer, researcher-to-researcher, student-to-student. Don’t let the writer respond until all questions have been raised.

V Conclusion Allow the writer time to respond to the collected questions.

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Cecile Piñeda Protocol(a la the Squaw Valley writers’ workshops)

The writer is silent while the following happens:

1. Each member of the group answers this question: What did you get out of the piece?

2. Each member of the group points out bright spots, places where the writing was alive or where he or she felt most connected to it.

3. Each member of the group points out places where the piece didn’t “work” for him or her.

4. Each member of the group answers this question: What’s missing in the piece? and completes the statement, “I would....”

Finally, the group members are silent while the following happens:

5. The writer responds to these questions:Did you get what you need from the group? What more would you like to hear?

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Hutchins’ Protocol

gentle ] encouraging

The facilitator raises each of the following questions, moving onto the next point only after everyone has participated.

1. What’s working?

2. What is this piece of writing about?

3. Suggestions for improvement...

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HOT SPOTS R e * V i s i o n

* Thanks to Kevin Mcllvoy and Lee Prusik for introducing and reintroducing the hot-spot concept when I most needed it as a writer and teacher.

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One way to focus on a work’s possibilities is to identify its hot-spots*. Imagine a hot-spot as being a source of energy in a piece of writing. For writers, this may be a place where we have more to say––where our work can become even more alive through sensory detail, adding things we heard, saw, tasted, smelled, or touched.

But a hot-spot can just as easily be a place in our writing we’d like to avoid. Energy works like that! Some fires are warm and inviting, others scare or confuse us with their smoke and flames.

There are places in our writing we may find uncomfortable to explore. Such resistance is a kind of pressure. We can use it to spark new ideas, so what we’d like to avoid in our own writing is just as helpful to us as what we long to return to.

Readers can also have a hot-spot experience while reading our texts. Readers help writers see work with fresh eyes by identifying places that are hot to them. They sense hot-spots by noticing where they get curious––places in a text where they want to know more about something we’ve written or how something sounds, tastes, looks, smells, or feels. Readers’ confusion may likewise signal a hot-spot. Each type offers writers an opportunity to go back and say more.

That’s why readers are so important to writers. They help us see possibilities we didn’t even know were there.

&

1. Read the work out loud.

2. Mark places where the text feels hot. (Feel energy in the text––energy of possibility and/or avoidance and confusion.)

3. After each mark, slice open the text. (Use scissors to cut the document and add space by taping in fresh pieces of blank paper.)

HOT-SPOTS PROTOCOL

18 *4. Explore each hot-spot. (Slow time down by filling in blank spots with more detail, examples, and/or explanation.)

COLLABORATIVE ASSESSMENT CONFERENCE

I Getting startedA. Copies of the selected work are distributed so everyone can read it. B. The participants observe or read the work more closely in silence, perhaps making brief notes about aspects of it that they particularly notice.C. The author of the work or assigning instructor commits to keeping silent in response to any comments about his or her work until step V.

II Describing the workA. The facilitator asks the group, “What do you see?”B. Group members respond without making interpretations, evaluations about the quality of the work, or statements of personal preference.C. If evaluations or interpretations emerge, the facilitator asks the person to describe the evi-dence on which those comments are based.

III Asking questions about the workA. The facilitator asks the group, “What questions does this work raise for you as writers, teach-ers and/or writing assistants?”B. Group members state any questions they have about the work, the writer, the assignment and the circumstances under which the work was carried out and so on.

IV Speculating about what the writer is working onA. The facilitator asks the group, “What do you think this writer is working on?”B. Participants, drawing on their observation of the work, make suggestions about the problems or issues the writer is focused on in carrying out the assignment.

V Hearing from the facilitator, writer and/or assigning teacherA. The facilitator and writer or teacher provide their perspective on the writer’s work and the assignment, describing what they see in it, responding to questions raised, and adding any other information that they feel is important to share with the group.B. The facilitator also comments on anything surprising or unexpected that she heard during the describing, questioning, and speculating phases.

VI Discussing implications for writing, teaching and learningA. The facilitator invites all participants to share any thoughts they have about their own writing and learning and ways to support each other as writers, teachers and/or writing assistants.

VII Reflecting on the assessment processA. The group reflects together on their experiences of or reactions to the conference as a whole or to particular parts of it.

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Writing Assistant Inquiry Circles

PROTOCOL

PHASE I: DESCRIPTION A. Focus Writing Assistant briefly describes situation and raises the question. B. Group responds with how, who, what, where, and when questions but no why questions. C. Focus Writing Assistant briefly answers questions and finally re-phrases question.

PHASE II: POSSIBLE INTERPRETATIONS A. Focus assistant must be silent why participants respond as described below. B. Participants respond by offering ideas about what may be underlying the situation or fresh insights about how it might be understood.

PHASE III: INTELLIGENT ACTIONS A. Focus assistant must again be silent why participants respond as described below. B. Participants respond by offering ideas about actions that may address the conditions underlying the situation or insights about how to respond with intelligence and compassion.

PHASE IV: FEEDBACK A. Focus assistant may now respond and give feedback to group. B. Participants must remain silent unless focus assistant asks a direct question.

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More Tools

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Faces

Ideas

Questions

Scen

esFeelings

From Andy Couturier of The Opening.

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Feedback Quality Assessment Worksheet Giving writers feedback is a funny business. While at some level any writer wants to generate interest, if not pleasure, for readers, not every reader is a best representative of the writer’s intended audience. That makes giving feedback a particularly tricky activity. That said, there are things readers can do to ensure their feedback is useful to writers. Here are some rules of thumb:

• Be encouraging. • Notice what is already there, what already works well. • Use “I” statements––I felt… I noticed… I remember… I thought…––rather than sentences that start with

“you.” • Be specific! Talk about word choices, sounds in sentences, images, dialogue, and types of evidence. • Notice strengths before inviting revision. • Honor the writer’s intentions and accept what he or she desires for the work, even when it doesn’t meet

your own tastes and expectations. • Know in your bones that the piece belongs to a writer other than you. You can’t know the answer for any

piece because the question its creation awakens did not arise from you. • Your job, as much as possible, is to foster the writer’s willingness to re-enter a piece and work on it some

more. • Say nothing dishonest! Say nothing unkind!

With these rules of thumb in mind, rate the effectiveness of the following comments on a scale from 0-10 with 10 being the most effective comment.

1) It’s good.

2) I don’t get it. 3) I don’t understand the part where you talked about your grandmother.

4) I was surprised by what you said about failing. I’d never thought about it like that.

5) For me your essay is about justice.

6) I noticed that in the beginning the writer used a lot of words that started with the letter b.

It created a lot of energy in the first paragraph and made me laugh in a good way.

7) You should defiantly change your thesis. I don’t agree with it.

8) The image on page two when the petals are floating down from the plum tree––wow––that was so beautiful. Not only did I picture it in my mind, it felt like I could smell them too.

9) After reading this essay I changed my mind about legalizing pot. I thought it was a dumb

idea, but the writer gave a lot of evidence to support her point, like here, where she says violence in Mexico would go down if pot were legal here.

10) In the introduction, she said violence in Mexico would go down, but she didn’t give any

proof. I agree with her thesis, but I think the essay would be better if she included a paragraph showing how violence would be reduced if pot were legal.

11) It’s like every other word in this play is misspelled. Do you even have spell-check?

12) I wondered about the conclusion. It’s only three sentences. Isn’t that really short?

SESSION NOTES

+ ?

23

REVISION & POSSIBILITY

+-P

X

ADD SOMETHING

REMOVE SOMETHING

MOVE SOMETHING

REPLACE SOMETHING

GLOBALLY LOCALLY

Big changes that effect the overall shape by doing things like adding or cutting whole sections or paragraphs, moving paragraphs around, and/or replacing the title, the opening, the conclusion, or even the thesis.

Small changes that hone the effect of individual sentences or paragraphs by doing things like adding phrases, cutting unnecessary words, moving the parts of sentences around, or replacing one word for another.

24

Revision allows writers to look at their work with fresh eyes. Rather than thinking of revision as being only about making a piece better, be willing, for a moment, to risk letting it become “worse.”

After all, writing is not an efficient activity. It takes time––a lot of time! In order to learn what we are really capable of as writers, we need to get messy. Revision allows us to do just that; make messes.

Instead of focusing on improvement, let the early stages of revision be about opening up new possibilities in a work. The possibilities are always infinite, which is why some writers find revision the most exciting and labor intensive phase of the writing process.

You can...

&

25

ESSAY PATTERNS TO HELP YOU ORGANIZE AND THINK ABOUT YOUR WRITING *

These patterns already live inside you! You inherited them along with your DNA. Each

can be mixed with the others to create more meaningful, dynamic, and effective essays.

! Problem––Solution ! Chronology (First this…., followed by this…, then this…) ! Process (first step…, second step…, third step…) ! Cause––Effect ! Argumentation (they say, but I say) ! Capturing Concrete Elements Inside Abstractions

Definition (1, 2, 3) Example (1, 2, 3) Reasons (1, 2, 3) Cause (1, 2, 3) Type (1, 2, 3)

! Beaded Necklace (360 degree view of a subject. Essay begins where it started) ! Concrete Images (what is seen, heard, touched, tasted, and smelled) ! Visual Description (looking left to right, top to bottom, foreground to background, circular, etc…) ! Cinematic (zoom in, zoom out, broad landscape, pan across landscape, etc…) ! Theatrical (dialogue between one or more characters) ! Storytelling (conflict––resolution) ! Intuitive Flow (whatever comes next generated by what came before) ! Mess-making and energy rising ! Dissonance (this, then this, then this, hey, what’s that!. Poetry often works like this)

* Thanks to Andy Couturier of the Opening.org for developing these concepts.

26

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27

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Welcome to the Academy! What did you bring?

PROOFREADING WORKSHEET While revision is about “re-envisioing” our work and exploring its possibilities as oppossed to “fixing” it, proofreading is where we begin to really focus on “mistakes” and work toward removing them. But to fix an error, we need to see it, something which is hard for writers to do since our sentences are already so familiar to us. Here’s some ideas and strategies about how to carefully and fruitfully go through your work, so you can see it, fix it, and ensure you essays are free of “errors.” Plus, there are some errorrs inside lots of the instructions and explanation of this paper, see if you can find them. There was one in the last sentence(s)!

• First, set the work aside for a day or two to distance yourself from it as much as possible. • Second, read it out loud very, very slowly, so you HEAR it with fresh ears.

• Consider re-reading it from the bottom of the last page to the top of the first, so you are

forced to hear and see each word and sentence out of order and with fresh eyes.

• Make marks as you go, but don’t stop to figure out how to fix things while your reading. In this way, you let your brain focus on one thing only, seeing the errors.

• As you read, make sure each sentence makes sense.

• Then re-read again looking for missing and/or unnecessarily repeated words?

• Is each sentence a really sentence?

1) Does it begin with a capital letter? 2) Does it have a subject? 3) Does it have a verb? 4) Does it make sense and complete an idea? 5) Does it have a final punctuation mark?

• Make a list of words that are spelled alike but mean different things––words such as:

they’re/their; its/it’s; your/you’re; etc… Check to make sure you’re using each of those words correctly.

• Check formatting:

1) Is each paragraph indented without skipped lines between them as MLA asks? 2) Is the essay double-spaced? 3) How does the first page look? Just as it should? Compare it to the guidelines in

Rules of Thumb or at the OWL site.

• Are there errors you regularly make in your writing––errors such as: comma splices; fragments, and spelling beginning as begging etc… Make a list of errors you sometimes make and check your writing for those kinds of thing.

• Do the subjects match the verbs?

29

• Do the verb tenses match and make sense within each paragrpah and across the essay?

• Are apostrophes used correctly, so that an s stands for plural nouns, as in apples, and a ‘s

for possession, as in Adam’s apples, and s’ for plural possesion as all the boys’ apples? (The exception, of course, being: it’s = it is while its = possession.)

• Are quotation marks used consistently and correctly? Are punctuation marks always

inside the quotation marks?

• What else can you look for? What are there other small errors you tend to make? (Some examples: to, two, too; there, they’re, their; where, we’re, were.)

• Citation Formatting: 1) Is all information properly cited, meaning if they are someone else’s words they

show up inside quotation marks, and if it they are someone else’s ideas they are given credit?

2) Inside the text, if there is a signal phrase does the parenthetical citation show up ant the end of the sentence with page number only followed by a period? Exp. (3).

3) Inside the text, if there is no signal phrase does the parenthetical citation include a last name and page number followed by a period? Exp. (Rivera 3).

4) Are book titles properly italicized? 5) Are magazine and article titles inside quotation marks? 6) Are long quotes set off with one-and-half-inch margins and the quote ends with a

period followed by the parenthetical citation? Exp. . (3) 7) Is the Works Cited page accurate and formatted exactly according to MLA

guidelines?

30

Sentence Types & Punctuation Handout

Four things necessary for a sentence

• Capital letter at the beginning • Final punctuation at the end (. ! ?)* • A verb and a subject that match each other • A complete thought/makes sense

Key terms

• A verb is an action: jump, spit, kick, lick etc… • A noun is a person place or thing. • A subject is always a noun, but not all nouns

are subjects. • An object is always a noun, but not all nouns

are objects.

* Other punctuation marks, such as commas, belong inside the sentence and allow writers to vary the length and rhythm of their sentences. Variety in sentence lengths and structures creates a more interesting and dynamic experience for readers.

1. BASIC SENTENCE Subject + verb.

Junior ate. Melissa prodded. Jerry watched.

2. SIMPLE SENTENCE Subject + verb + object.

Junior ate cheese. Melissa prodded Jerry. Jerry stole cheese.

3. COMMAS SEPARATING ITEMS IN A SERIES Subject + verb + noun (or verb), + noun (or verb), and + noun (or verb).

Junior liked cheese, Melissa, and bb guns. Melissa organized heists, poker games, and dog-walking schemes. Jerry ate, burped, slept, and picked pimples.

31

Sentence Types & Punctuation Handout cont… 4. COMMAS AND CONJUCTIONS JOINING TWO SENTENCES

Subject + verb, conjunction subject + verb. for and nor but or yet so Melissa organized poker games, and Jerry always lost. Jerry always lost, but Junior gave him cheese. Jerry had cheese, so he didn’t go hungry.

5. COMMAS LINKING APOSITIVE PHRASES Subject + verb + noun, + a phrase about the preceding noun.

Junior loved his cheese, cheese with holes and cheese that stunk, stinky cheese and creamy cheese. That stink is what drove Melissa insane, insane like a deranged genius, an angry genius but an effective one, one who could plan a scheme better than any other, others including CEOs or gangster thugs.

5A. COMMAS LINKING APOSITIVE PHRASES (THE EMBEDDED CLAUSE) Subject, a phrase about the preceding noun, + verb.

Jerry, who lived in Hollister, completed the schemes. Jerry loved Hollister, a small town in San Benito County, where a dog once bit him.

6. COMMAS AFTER AN INTRODUCTORY CLAUSE Phrase, subject + verb.

In general, it was Junior who took care of Jerry and encouraged Melissa to treat him kindly. For example, once when they were children he’d stopped her from lighting Jerry’s hair on fire.

7. Special punctuation and paragraphing for dialogue “Don’t make me go out there again to walk those dogs,” said Jerry.

“Why not?” asked Melissa. “If you don’t Junior will, and I’ll tell him how much you’re getting paid.” “So?” “Don’t you think he’ll want back all his cheese?” “What was that?” asked Junior, walking into the room. “Nothing,” said Melissa. “Nothing at all.” “No really,” said Junior. “I want to know. Jerry, what’d she say?” “Uh, nothing.” Jerry stared at his shoes. “Jerry?”

Melissa shot Junior a look, grabbed a handful of dog-leashes, and placed him in the boy’s hands. “No really,” said Junior, looking concerned. “What’s going on here?”

“Nothing,” said Melissa, “nothing at all. Isn’t that right, Jerry? You were just about to take these dogs for a walk.” “Yeah,” said Jerry. That’s it.”

32

ADDITIONAL WRITING CENTER RESOURCES

Over the years, the center has collected various strategies and tools we’ve found helpful to Gavilan’s writer. Some of these are available as handouts, worksheets and/or game sets. Feel free to make copies to share with your students.

Handbooks and dictionaries are kept on the book shelves.

33

The Gavilan College Writing Center

Website & Links

Visit our website for other ideas and resources at:

http://www.gavilan.edu/writing/

Also, check out...

The Writing Lab at Purdue University (a premiere source for all kinds of online writing help)

http://owl.english.purdue.edu/owl/

The Writing Center of Capital College (features a bank of common grammar questions & answers)

http://grammar.ccc.commnet.edu/grammar/

34

Tools for Readers

WRITER

TEXT

READER

In the above conception, the writer creates a kind of code (the text) which the reader must “break” in order to derive meaning. That meaning is assumed to be fixed (a reader can get it “wrong”). Thus meaning exists apart from the reader and arrives via a single route.

WRITER TEXT

In this conception, the writer, text, and reader have shared roles in the construction of meaning. From here there are seemingly infinite potential associations that can be created because of and through each of the above elements and the contexts from which they arrive. Therefore, no meaning is ever fixed nor any interpretation “wrong.”

READER

Figure 1. Figure 2.

35

QUOTE JOURNAL

QUOTE

(Pick three passages and write them below

exactly as they appear in the text. Be sure to note the page number where each quote

appears.)

REFLECTION

(Say a little something about what each quote means to you? How is it related to other ideas you’ve heard and/or other things you’ve read?

What questions does it raise for you as a scholar, writer, and human being?)

1.

1.

2.

2.

3.

3.

36

K

WL+

CH

AR

T N

ame:

T

itle

of

Rea

din

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ncl

ud

e p

age

nu

mb

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:

Fill

out

the

first

tw

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Fi

ll ou

t th

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st t

wo

colu

mns

aft

er t

he r

eadi

ng.

Wha

t do

you

alrea

dy k

now

?

Wha

t m

ore

do y

ou w

ant

to

lear

n?

W

hat

did

you

lear

n?

W

hat

mor

e do

you

wan

t to

le

arn?

37

QUESTION COLLECTIONFACTUAL QUESTIONS

O�Who? O�What? O�Where?O�When?

INTERPRETIVE QUESTIONSO�Why?O�How? O�In what ways?

CONNECTING QUESTIONSO�What if?O�How might?O�How is it like…? O�How is it unlike…?

EVALUATIVE QUESTIONSO�What do I think?O�But what about?O�+RZ�FDQ�WKLV�SRLQW�EH�MXVWLÀHG�DQG�RU�proven?

38

39

Individual Responsibility**

Magical

Inquisitive & Transformational***

Forms of Consciousness*

Force vs. Hegemony Structures that enforce and establish

social, political, and economic stratification and imbalance using:

violencethreats

coercion

Structures that establish and maintain social norms and beliefs resulting in social, political, and economic stratification and imbalance, including:

familymediaschool

workplacereligion

The divine plan.The natural order.

People make choices.Some people make good ones.Some people make bad ones.

How does society shape us and how can we and it be transformed to develop equality, harmony, and balance for all of humanity and the planet as a whole?

POWER

* The ideas of Paulo Friere greatly contributed to the ideas in this chart.

**Friere called this Naive Consciousness.***Friere called this Critical Consciousness.

40

VARIETIES OF POWER*

power over selfpower over othersothers holding power over ussharing power in mutually beneficial ways

Turning People into Objects vs. Experiencing Someone’s Subjectivity

Depends on: force manipulation coercion secrecy

Includes: inquiry welcome listening talking observation participation transparency loving exchange ongoing transformation

r

* The ideas of Paulo Friere and Antonio Gramsci greatly contributed to the ideas in this chart.

Understanding

Tips for Getting the Most Out of a Session in the Writing Center

Keep in Mind*Our goal is to improve writers, not individual pieces of writing.

We respect and encourage writers to take responsibility for their own writing and to make their own choices about a piece.

We model problem-solving for writers and pride ourselves on finding answers in handbooks, dictionaries and from other writers.

We readily admit when we do not know the answer to someone’s question and help writers find their own answers.

* From the Academic Skills Achievement Program of California State University, Monterey Bay

41

* From the Allyn and Bacon Guide to Peer Tutoring, by Paula Gillespie and Neal Lerner

“Our job is to produce better writers, not better writing”

Stephen North“The Idea of a

Writing Center”

WE ARE WRITING ASSISTANTS AND WE WILL*

Focus on the writer’s developmentEstablish rapport and connection with the writer

Make sure writers take ownership of their work and ideasAsk questions

Ask the writer to read aloudNotice what is already working well in a piece

Meet writers where they are with a pieceHelp writers learn how to proofread

Expect writers to make their own correctionsAsk about plans for further revision

Gavilan College

WRITING CENTER 5055 Santa Teresa Blvd., Gilroy, CA 95020 (408) 848-4811

WHAT TO EXPECT FROM WRITING ASSISTANTS DURING A CONSULTATION SESSION

WE AREN’T EDITORS AND WE WON’T*

Focus only on the textTake ownership of a piece

Correct it for the writerGive advice to a writer or tell them what to do

Read a piece silentlyLook mainly for things to improve

Expect to work only with “ideal” texts

WHAT IS A WRITING CENTER?

A Long History: An International PhenomenonThe first writing centers were developed on university campuses in the 1970s to meet the needs of under-prepared and “basic-skills”* students. Current research demonstrates that the pedagogical approaches and services provided through a Writing Center effectively help writers and readers improve their engagement with literacy and meet academic and professional success.

Writing centers can now be found all over the world, providing programs at universities, community colleges and high school campuses across the United States and in Japan, Nigeria, Ukraine and Taiwan among other countries.

As the phenomenon grows, writing centers have recognized the connection and recursive relationship between reading and writing and seek to build on it.

PhilosophyThe philosophical foundation of writing center work can be found in the following expressions:w Anyone can engage in writing and reading in a meaningful manner.w Writing and reading are recursive activities.w Writers and readers benefit from dialogue in community with other writers and readers.

At GavilanThe Gavilan College Writing Center is a part of this larger international conversation, and since 2003, its mission has been to serve the campus community by fostering, celebrating and encouraging writers and the varied and multiple purposes and audiences that writing serves.

The Gavilan center assists writers in identifying and developing tools and strategies to meet goals for their writing both in and out of the classroom. It

43

offers space for exploration and reflection on a wide range of written material, promotes an appreciation for literature and literacy and cultivates diverse writers’ voices and the communities that nurture them.

Programs & ServicesPrograms and services the Gavilan center offers include the following:w One-on-one consultation between student writers and specially trained peer writing assistants (tutors).w Supplemental Instructionw Partnerships with lab instructors via writing assistants, who offer supplemental instruction and study group facilitation.w Workshops on academic and creative writing.w Self-directed mini-lessons on grammar, spelling and punctuation.w Special events through the Visiting Writers and Scholars in Residence Program.w On-line service, including mini-lessons and multi-media exploration of writing topics.w Free use of computers and the internet.

* The usage of the term “basic-skills,” to indicate students who have had limited opportunities, access and/or exposure to academic language is increasingly being questioned. Other terms include, emerging scholars, Academic English language learners and members of generation 1.5.

44

Kimberly Jean SmithWriting Center Coordinatorwork: (408) 848-4889 cell: (831) 262-1025email: ksmith@gavilan.edu

Assistant Coordinatorwork: (408) 848-4811 (The Writing Center)

email: ________________@gavilan.edu

additional contact information will be distributed in class

Contact Information

45