transitions, a workshop on living and dying

A Reflection on Cherry Blossoms

“They look like normal trees except one week a year, then the horizon explodes with white, looking like a

snow-covered expanse, so vivid, you think you’re dreaming.

A week later the trees are just trees again, like it never happened.

They signify, as they do to the Yakuza, a short, sweet beautiful life.

A Reflection on Cherry Blossoms

“They look like normal trees except one week a year, then the horizon explodes with white, looking like a

snow-covered expanse, so vivid, you think you’re dreaming.

A week later the trees are just trees again, like it never happened.

They signify, as they do to the Yakuza, a short, sweet beautiful life.

They tell us of the importance of the ephemeral, passing beauty

that we have to enjoy and be ready to let go quickly…

…because life is a collection of moments.”

- m. a. chip childers

They tell us of the importance of the ephemeral, passing beauty

that we have to enjoy and be ready to let go quickly…

…because life is a collection of moments.”

- m. a. chip childers

Accepting Our Mortality,

Appreciating The Mystery

The wonder of life is often overlooked. The

preciousness of being alive, of accepting ourselves, each other, and our world, is sometimes the last thing we remember in our rush to handle the details of daily life.

Yet remembering the fragility of our days awakens us to the truth that in every moment we are dying to something, and ultimately we, and everyone we know, will leave this world entirely.

“Graceful Passages”

Accepting Our Mortality,

Appreciating The Mystery

The wonder of life is often overlooked. The

preciousness of being alive, of accepting ourselves, each other, and our world, is sometimes the last thing we remember in our rush to handle the details of daily life.

Yet remembering the fragility of our days awakens us to the truth that in every moment we are dying to something, and ultimately we, and everyone we know, will leave this world entirely.


Our culture has this obsession on “the bright side of the moon”, those attributes of youth, good looks, and success that buffers us from facing the moonless night of

loss and mortality.

For those of us who have lost our jobs, experienced the breakup of a loving relationship, been diagnosed with a serious illness, or have had

to face the death of a loved one, the dark side of the moon is not far away.


Our culture has this obsession on “the bright side of the moon”, those attributes of youth, good looks, and success that buffers us from facing the moonless night of

loss and mortality.

For those of us who have lost our jobs, experienced the breakup of a loving relationship, been diagnosed with a serious illness, or have had

to face the death of a loved one, the dark side of the moon is not far away.


Acknowledging the inevitable can be

healing.

As reluctant as we may be to approach the subject,

accepting our mortality is an important

step toward embracing life on its own terms,

and recognizing the moment-by-moment gift that is LIFE.


Acknowledging the inevitable can be

healing.

As reluctant as we may be to approach the subject,

accepting our mortality is an important

step toward embracing life on its own terms,

and recognizing the moment-by-moment gift that is LIFE.


Waning into darkness each month, the lunar cycle

reminds us of a natural progression constantly repeating itself.

We may not want summer to end, yet

winter comes, revealing a different landscape altogether.

Even the most glorious day turns to night, requiring us to adapt to a different kind of light.


Waning into darkness each month, the lunar cycle

reminds us of a natural progression constantly repeating itself.

We may not want summer to end, yet

winter comes, revealing a different landscape altogether.

Even the most glorious day turns to night, requiring us to adapt to a different kind of light.


To ask for what we want is human.

To be willing to receive what comes is

grace.

While we cannot resist the natural course of change, we can choose to pass through it gracefully.


To ask for what we want is human.

To be willing to receive what comes is

grace.

While we cannot resist the natural course of change, we can choose to pass through it gracefully.


With every loss, we are faced with the fragility of our situation.

We die a little every day. In countless minor and sometimes major ways, we lose control over and over again.

How we respond to this continuous process is

our preparation for how we will face our own eventual death, as well as how we meet others during their times of transition.

To enfold the process of dying in the embrace of living is a challenge that faces us, both individually and as a society.


With every loss, we are faced with the fragility of our situation.

We die a little every day. In countless minor and sometimes major ways, we lose control over and over again.

How we respond to this continuous process is

our preparation for how we will face our own eventual death, as well as how we meet others during their times of transition.

To enfold the process of dying in the embrace of living is a challenge that faces us, both individually and as a society.


Alan Jones, Dean of Grace Cathedral in San

Francisco, says, “We practice dying every day so we can be fully alive.”

By facing our fears of dying, and

making peace with our own life journey, we can have a more spacious, free, and joyful existence.

Embracing our losses, our little deaths,

rather than resisting them, strengthens our courage to more easily accept when surrender is the only option.


Alan Jones, Dean of Grace Cathedral in San

Francisco, says, “We practice dying every day so we can be fully alive.”

By facing our fears of dying, and

making peace with our own life journey, we can have a more spacious, free, and joyful existence.

Embracing our losses, our little deaths,

rather than resisting them, strengthens our courage to more easily accept when surrender is the only option.


How do we bring beauty and dignity to our

endings?

How do we best honor sacred traditions, and yet leave room for the mystery beyond any pathway?

How might we meet each other during our times of dying – whether they are emotional, physical, or

spiritual – in the deepest way possible allowing whatever is happening to take

place without intruding or assuming?


How do we bring beauty and dignity to our

endings?

How do we best honor sacred traditions, and yet leave room for the mystery beyond any pathway?

How might we meet each other during our times of dying – whether they are emotional, physical, or

spiritual – in the deepest way possible allowing whatever is happening to take

place without intruding or assuming?


The love will endure, never fear.

In fact, beyond the personal self,

love just gets stronger, purer, freer, deeper.

The love will endure, never fear.

In fact, beyond the personal self,

love just gets stronger, purer, freer, deeper.

“Graceful Passages”“Graceful

Passages”

Resistance to Discussing Death and Dying

A culture that is more fear-based – death not seen as a natural course of living

Fear of unknown is human nature

Family’s avoidance of topic of death due to discomfort and concern of giving up hope

Brings up personal loss and grief issues for

counselors and caregivers

Resistance to Discussing Death and Dying

A culture that is more fear-based – death not seen as a natural course of living

Fear of unknown is human nature

Family’s avoidance of topic of death due to discomfort and concern of giving up hope

Brings up personal loss and grief issues for

counselors and caregivers

-Lora Matz-Lora Matz

Healing in Death and DyingHealing in Death and Dying

It's the heart afraid of breaking

that never learns to dance

It's the dream afraid of waking

that never takes the chance

It's the one who won't be taken

who cannot seem to give

and the soul afraid of dying

that never learns to live

It's the heart afraid of breaking

that never learns to dance

It's the dream afraid of waking

that never takes the chance

It's the one who won't be taken

who cannot seem to give

and the soul afraid of dying

that never learns to live

THE ROSETHE ROSE

On Fear…

“Our greatest fear is that when we die we will

become nothing.

Many of us believe that our entire existence is only a life span beginning the moment we are born or conceived and ending the moment we die.

We believe that we are born from nothing and that when we die we become nothing.

And so we are filled with fear of annihilation.”

- Thich Nhat Hanh, “No Death, No Fear”

On Fear…

“Our greatest fear is that when we die we will

become nothing.

Many of us believe that our entire existence is only a life span beginning the moment we are born or conceived and ending the moment we die.

We believe that we are born from nothing and that when we die we become nothing.

And so we are filled with fear of annihilation.”


There is no birth, there is no death;

there is no coming, there is no going;

there is no same, there is no different;

there is no permanent self, there is no annihilation.

We only think there is.

When we understand that we cannot be destroyed, we are liberated from fear. It is a great relief.

We can enjoy life and appreciate it in a new way.”


There is no birth, there is no death;

there is no coming, there is no going;

there is no same, there is no different;

there is no permanent self, there is no annihilation.

We only think there is.

When we understand that we cannot be destroyed, we are liberated from fear. It is a great relief.

We can enjoy life and appreciate it in a new way.”


On Impermanence

“Our true nature is the nature of no birth and no death.

We do not have to go anywhere in order to touch our true nature. The wave does not have to look for water for she is water.

We do not have to look for God, we do not have to look for our ultimate dimension or nirvana, because

we are nirvana, we are God.

You are what you are looking for. You are already what you want to become.”


On Impermanence

“Our true nature is the nature of no birth and no death.

We do not have to go anywhere in order to touch our true nature. The wave does not have to look for water for she is water.

We do not have to look for God, we do not have to look for our ultimate dimension or nirvana, because

we are nirvana, we are God.

You are what you are looking for. You are already what you want to become.”


Impermanence Makes Everything Possible

“We are often sad and suffer a lot when things change, but change and impermanence have a positive side.

Thanks to impermanence, everything is possible. Life itself is possible. If a grain of corn is not impermanent, it can never be transformed into a stalk of corn. If the stalk were not impermanent, it could never provide us with the ear of corn we eat.”


Impermanence Makes Everything Possible

“We are often sad and suffer a lot when things change, but change and impermanence have a positive side.

Thanks to impermanence, everything is possible. Life itself is possible. If a grain of corn is not impermanent, it can never be transformed into a stalk of corn. If the stalk were not impermanent, it could never provide us with the ear of corn we eat.”


Taking New Forms

“When we lose someone we love, we should remember that the person has not become nothing. “Something” cannot become “nothing”, and “nothing” cannot become “something”.

Science can help us understand this, because matter cannot be destroyed – it can become energy. And energy can become matter, but it cannot be destroyed. In the same way, our beloved was not destroyed; she has just taken on another form.

We can see our loved one in everything. And smiling, we can say, “Dear one, I know you are there very close to me. I know that your nature is the nature of no birth and no death. I know that I have not lost you; you are always with me.”

If you look deeply at every moment of your daily life, you will see that person. Practicing like this, you will be able to overcome your grief.”


Taking New Forms

“When we lose someone we love, we should remember that the person has not become nothing. “Something” cannot become “nothing”, and “nothing” cannot become “something”.

Science can help us understand this, because matter cannot be destroyed – it can become energy. And energy can become matter, but it cannot be destroyed. In the same way, our beloved was not destroyed; she has just taken on another form.

We can see our loved one in everything. And smiling, we can say, “Dear one, I know you are there very close to me. I know that your nature is the nature of no birth and no death. I know that I have not lost you; you are always with me.”

If you look deeply at every moment of your daily life, you will see that person. Practicing like this, you will be able to overcome your grief.”


“Where was Jesus before He was born?”“Where was Jesus before He was born?”



“Everybody is doing everything for themselves…. When you understand that this is true even about dying, you will never fear dying again.”

“Dying is something you do for you.”

“You are the cause of your own death. This is always true, no matter where, or how, you die.”

-Neale Donald Walsch, “Home with God”

“Everybody is doing everything for themselves…. When you understand that this is true even about dying, you will never fear dying again.”

“Dying is something you do for you.”

“You are the cause of your own death. This is always true, no matter where, or how, you die.”


“Do you think that dying is something that occurs against your will

You cannot die against your will.”

Why in the world would I choose to die, ever?

Oh that’simple.

Because you’re done. Finished. Complete.


“Do you think that dying is something that occurs against your will

You cannot die against your will.”

Why in the world would I choose to die, ever?

Oh that’simple.

Because you’re done. Finished. Complete.


“Once you answer most of the questions

you’ve ever had about death, you’ll have

answered most of the questions you’ve ever

had about life.”


“Once you answer most of the questions

you’ve ever had about death, you’ll have

answered most of the questions you’ve ever

had about life.”


“All souls find peace after their death. Not all souls find peace before it.

Death is never a tragedy. It is

always a gift.”


“All souls find peace after their death. Not all souls find peace before it.

Death is never a tragedy. It is

always a gift.”


“You are different from God but you are not divided from God. That is why you can never die.

You and God are one. There is no separation between you.”


“You are different from God but you are not divided from God. That is why you can never die.

You and God are one. There is no separation between you.”


“Death does not exist, but the perceptions and perspectives from which they arise.

Life is eternal.”


“Death does not exist, but the perceptions and perspectives from which they arise.

Life is eternal.”


“The timing and the circumstances of death

are always perfect.

No death is wasted, and all death brings a message to those who leave the earth and to those who remain.

The death of every person always serves the agenda of every other person who is aware of it. That is why they are aware of it. Therefore, no death (and no life) is ever

“wasted”. No one ever dies “in vain’.


“The timing and the circumstances of death

are always perfect.

No death is wasted, and all death brings a message to those who leave the earth and to those who remain.

The death of every person always serves the agenda of every other person who is aware of it. That is why they are aware of it. Therefore, no death (and no life) is ever

“wasted”. No one ever dies “in vain’.


“In death you will be greeted by all your loved ones – those who have died before you and those who will die after you.

These souls will comfort you as you

release your attachment to the physical world, gently guiding you into the

spiritual realm. You need never be alone, ever, nor are you ever alone now.”


“In death you will be greeted by all your loved ones – those who have died before you and those who will die after you.

These souls will comfort you as you

release your attachment to the physical world, gently guiding you into the

spiritual realm. You need never be alone, ever, nor are you ever alone now.”


We never do die. We merely change form,

In short evolve into a form that human eyes can no longer see.

The reason why people change form is that

the ultimate purpose of the soul is to feel the grandest feeling called

LOVE.

- Marq Dollentes

We never do die. We merely change form,

In short evolve into a form that human eyes can no longer see.

The reason why people change form is that

the ultimate purpose of the soul is to feel the grandest feeling called

LOVE.

- Marq Dollentes

REFLECTION

on the tranquility

of Falling Cherry Blossoms

FOR A MOMENT THEY HOVER LIKE BEJEWELLED CLOUDS

AND DANCE ABOVE THE CRYSTAL STREAMS;

THEN, AS THEY SAIL AWAY ON THE LAUGHING WATERS

THEY SEEM TO SAY

“FAREWELL, O SPRING! WE ARE ON TO ETERNITY.”

-Okakura Kakuzo

REFLECTION

on the tranquility

of Falling Cherry Blossoms

FOR A MOMENT THEY HOVER LIKE BEJEWELLED CLOUDS

AND DANCE ABOVE THE CRYSTAL STREAMS;

THEN, AS THEY SAIL AWAY ON THE LAUGHING WATERS

THEY SEEM TO SAY

“FAREWELL, O SPRING! WE ARE ON TO ETERNITY.”

-Okakura Kakuzo

transitions, a workshop on living and dying

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