FINAL WEEK TO SELECT BEST OF LA CROSSE • VOTE ONLINE • WWW.SECONDSUPPER.COM

PLUS: POP-PUNK PSYCHEDELIA • PAGE 6 | A SOBERING 'SOUTH PARK'• PAGE 15 | BEER FEST THOUGHTS • PAGE 10

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VOLUME 10, NO. 16 | APRIL 29, 2010

Play to Win, Without Losing

Your Shirtpage 5

2// April 29, 2010 Second Supper

Social Networking NAME AND AGE: Nathan Delarwelle, 23

WHERE WERE YOU BORN? Appleton, WI

CURRENT JOB: Cook at John's Bar

DREAM JOB: Talk show host

LAST THING YOU GOOGLED: Mike Patton

IF YOU COULD LIVE ANYWHERE IN THE WORLD, WHERE WOULD IT BE? Parana, Brazil

WHAT IS SOMETHING YOU WANT TO DO BEFORE YOU DIE?Travel a lot

IF A GENIE GRANTED YOU ONE WISH, WHAT WOULD YOU ASK FOR? To be a member of the Wu-Tang Clan

CELEBRITY CRUSH: Salma Hayek

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FRI. 4.30Lollipop Factory

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FRI. 5.7Shot to Hell with Donoma

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FIRST CONCERT YOU WENT TO: Bodeans (when I was very young with my mother)

WHAT IS YOUR BEVERAGE OF CHOICE? Chocolate milk

WHAT BOOK ARE YOU CURRENTLY READING? Dune (again)

TELL US YOUR GUILTIEST PLEASURE: The Smiths

WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST PET PEEVE? Weak tippers

TELL US A JOKE: Why doesn't a chicken wear pants? Because his peckeris on his head!

WHAT'S THE LAST THING YOU BOUGHT? Orange juice

WHAT'S IN YOUR POCKET RIGHT NOW?: Magic

WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE PART OF SECOND SUPPER?Beer reviews

HOW DO YOU KNOW PATRICK (LAST WEEK'S SUBJECT)? From the woods

— Shuggypop Jackson, shuggypop.jackson@secondsupper.com

Second Supper614 Main St., La Crosse, WI 54601

Phone: (608) 782-7001Online: secondsupper.com

Publisher: Roger Bartelroger.bartel@secondsupper.com

Editor in Chief: Adam Bissen adam.bissen@secondsupper.com

Student Editor: Emily Faeth emily.faeth@secondsupper.com

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Contributors: Amy Alkon, Erich Boldt, Nick Cabreza,

Brett Emerson, Jake Groteuschen, Shuggypop Jackson, Matt Jones,

Carolyn Ryan, Anna Soldner,Nate Willer

Second Supper is a weekly alternative newspaper published by

Bartanese Enterprises LLC, 614 Main St., La Crosse, WI 54601

Second Supper April 29, 2010 // 3

Rock out for radio Is there any better way to cap off a nice drive through the Coulee Region than having a cold one and listening to music? We

think not. So if you find yourself in Viroqua on Saturday evening stop into the Viking Inn and head upstairs to support WDRT 91.9 at their Spring Benefit Bash. They will have food and beverages available and are asking for a $10 donation. Ted Parrish’s Bad Axe Blues Band and Jfar Coretet will be wailing away all

evening, so have a blast and show some love for community radio.

See a big show So it’s Thursday and you still have no idea what to do on Saturday night, well have we got a suggestion for you! Grab a few friends and head on over to Impluse. It's normally billed as

a dance club, but on Saturday night they are featuring a fantastic lineup of hip-hop, reggae and rock artists from around the area. Nick Shattuck, Hyphon, T.U.G.G. and out-of-towner F. Stokes will all be performing. Shattuck, Hyphon and T.U.G.G.

play in and around La Crosse regularly, but F. Stokes is a hip-hop artist from Chicago. He sounds a bit like Jay-Z but with a bit more experimental beats. The show starts at 9:30 p.m. and is totally FREE. So no matter your budget you can afford this show. And if you’re lucky you may catch a Spartan or Lady Spartan wandering about the club.

TheTop

FIRST THINGS FIRSTThings To Do

1

2

Things Milwaukee has going for it1. The Bucks2. Summerfest3. Braun, McGehee & Fielder4. Has elected 3 Socialist mayors5. Lakefront Brewery6. Thurman’s 157. Riverwest

Shows currently on television1. Breaking Bad2. Treme3. Lost4. South Park5. Desperate Housewives6. Archer7. Always Sunny in Philadelphia

Get fit Still not ready to hit the beach in your new swimwear, or just looking for an active way to spend this weekend? Hop, skip

or jump your way down the La Crosse Center on Friday evening from 5 p.m. to 8 p.m. and get yourself registered for the La Crosse Fitness Festivals. The festival will run through the weekend. Events include a bike tour, 5k run/walk, marathon, half-marathon, fitness expo

and a marathon relay. This is the second annual La Crosse Fitness festival and it is geared towards everyone, regardless of age or fitness ability. So even if you can’t quite break the three-hour mark on your marathon, head on down and check out some of the other events. You and your body will not be disappointed.

4Give it up for the Earth Friday marks the final day of April, which also make it the last day of La Crosse Earth month. And what a month it was! A full slate of events filled the La Crosse social calendar (as well as the Second Supper entertaintment calendar) for 30 awe-some days this year. It was an impressive dis-play of envionrmental activism and commu-nity building, so get out on the last day of the month and hoot it up! Fittingly, Earth Month concludes with an event at the Myrick Hixon EcoPark, the new building could be the center of a greener La Crosse for years to come. Hans Meyer, the popular local children's singer, will perform a concert with songs from his CD "It's Our World: The Green Album." Coming from a genuinely talented and original musician, these songs aren't only for kids. Admission is free, but due to limited space, reservations are suggested, so go to the Nature Center to pick up tickets in advance. And to get in the spirit of things, round up the whole family for a bike ride down to the park. Because even though May is just around the corner, every month is Earth Month!

3

4// April 29, 2010 Second SupperCOMMENTARY

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CLASSIFIEDS

The WisPolitics.com Stock Report

Russ Decker Insiders say one thing was clear thissession — nothing got done without RussDecker’s support. Veteran legislative ob-servers say the Senate majority leader of-ten dictated not only what happened inhis house but what went on in the Assem-bly as well, repeatedly outmaneuveringhis less experienced counterparts. Frompayday lender legislation down the line,Decker often got more than what he hadto give up. Insiders say Decker picked outa path that exposed his vulnerable mem-berstofewerbadvotes,givinghimafight-ingchance to retaincontrolof theSenateina toxicenvironment forDems.But thatalsohasadownside.SomeDemscomplainthatevenwithfullcontrolofthestatehouseandtheguv'sofficeforthefirst timesincethe 1980s, they have few accomplishmentsto show for it. There are a lot of unmoti-vatedDemsrightnow, theysay,andintheend Decker chose political expediency.

Wisconsin Manufacturers & Commerce The state’s largest business group be-gan the session sounding likeanorganiza-tion hoping to set a kinder, gentler tonewith Dems in control of all levers of gov-ernment. But the group goes out tootingitsownhornafterbeatingbackthe“CleanEnergyJobsAct.”SenateDems,waryofthepolitical negatives of CEJA, put the finalnail in its coffin. But insiders credit WMCwith setting up its demise. The group or-ganizedbusinessesstatewidetoopposethebill,ranradioadsacrossWisconsinandputtogether an aggressive phone campaignto target lawmakers. The group's rhetoricandlobbyingalsohelpedspuradrumbeatof pressure from conservative Milwaukeetalk radio on key Democrats in conserva-tivedistrictslikeJeffPlaleandJimSullivan.

J.B. Van Hollen TheGOPattorneygeneralmadeelimi-natingthebacklogofDNAsamplesatstatecrime labs a centerpiece of his 2006 cam-paign.Andhedeliverson thatpledge,an-nouncinghisagencyhassuccessfullywipedit out. Critics note Van Hollen had origi-nally promised to do the job with existingDOJ resourcesand say somecredit shouldgo to lawmakers and Gov. Jim Doyle, whodelivered the additional help. Others saythat’s a minor detail, and all that mattersto the public is that Van Hollen deliveredonhispledgeanddid itwell aheadofhisre-election campaign kicking into gear.Van Hollen also scores wins with anotherpharmaceutical company settlement andthe legislative death of proposed electionchanges thathe railedagainst for its voterfraud potential. Insiders on both sides saytheAGisagoodbetforre-electionat thispoint, though some Dems hope the anti-incumbent mood pulsating through thepubliccangivehimsome trouble this fall.

Jeff Wood The soap opera that has been JeffWoodfinallycomestoacloseastheLegis-lature adjourns for the session and Demsand Republicans begin fight over his seatWoodissentencedto45daysinjailafterhereachesapleadealinColumbiaCountytosettlethefirstofhisthreearrestsonsuspi-cionofOWIbetween2008and2009.TheAssemblythenfollowsthatupbycensuringWoodforhisarrestsafterDemsturnedbackGOPattemptstoexpelWoodfromthebody.Critics trashDems forprotectingsomeonethey consider to be a threat to the publicand charge they’ve tarnished themselvesby going to bat for someone who doesn’tdeserve it.Onhiswayout,Woodprovidesammotohiscritics.Hecomplainsinthefi-nalweekthatlawmakerswerevotingonhispunishmentintheweehoursofthemorn-ing — just days after his effort to force avoteonhis fate failed in theweehoursofthe morning. And he storms the CapitolpressroomtoscreamatanAssociatedPressreporter. Others counter Wood obviouslyhasproblemsanddeservesahelpinghand.

Enviros It turns out to be a downer of anEarth Day for many Wisconsin enviros, asa slimmed-down "Clean Energy Jobs Act"gets shelved on the Legislature's last day.DespiteDemcontrolofbothhousesoftheLegislature and the guv’s office, the envi-ronmental lobby and its elected allies notonly can’t push through CEJA, its crownjewel,butalsofailtogetaNaturalResourc-es Board-appointed DNR secretary andgroundwaterprotections.Insidersconsiderthosefailuresasevereblowtotheenviron-mental community, chalking themup toaseries of reasons. Some say the lobby hasbeentoo inflexible,wantingeverythingontheirwishlistandbeingunwillingtoacceptcompromise. Breaking up the CEJA intosmaller parts could have produced somesignificant wins, some say. Others say thelobby was a victim of the times. With thestatestillstrugglingtoemergefromthere-cessionandpeoplefocusedalmostentirelyonjobs,itwasabadtimetopushanythingthatcouldbeseenasathreattotheecono-my.Stillotherscontendenviros simplygotoutworked on CEJA rhetoric, saying thepublicvieweditasajobskiller,notthejobscreatorsupporterstriedtomakeitouttobe.

Medical marijuana Backers believe they had the publicontheirside.Butmedicalmarijuananeverevenreallygotoutofthestartinggatethissession, failing to emerge from commit-tee.Madison-areaDembackersRep.MarkPocan and Sen. Jon Erpenbach lamentthe setback in a letter to supporters, not-ing the progress that’s been made on theissue and promising to keep up the fight.Observers say while the public may be onboard with medical marijuana, lawmak-ers are still uneasy about embracing it.

RISING FALLING

MIXED Jim Doyle Theoutgoingguv snagsa fewwinsasthefinal legislativesessionofhisgovernor-shipwindstoaclose.Butinsidersdon’tseeanybiglegacy-buildingvictoriesandsayhesufferedaseriousblowwhenallhisadmin-istration'seffortstopassthe“CleanEnergyJobsAct” goup inflames.Doylehas triedto stake claims to being an education andhealth care guv, and he finally gets somemovement from the Legislature on a billsupporters hope will bolster the state’s ap-plication for federal “Race to the Top”funds.HisBadgerCareexpansionalsowinsfinal approval, checking off another itemonhisto-dolist,andlawmakerssignoffonhis“GreentoGold”manufacturingbusinessloan program. But his calls for a constitu-tional amendment to allow targeted prop-ertytaxrelief,mayoralcontrolofMilwaukeeschools,RTAsand theanti-globalwarmingbill go nowhere. Insiders say part of thatstems from Doyle’s failure to cultivate anyrealrelationswithlawmakersduringhistwoterms in office, especially powerful SenateMajorityLeaderRussDecker.Theysaythatwas underscored when the Legislature ap-provedaresolutiontohonorLt.Gov.BarbLawtonforherservicebutdidn’tbotherwithasimilaronefortheguv.Whenheneededhelponbig-ticketitems,hedidn’thavethenecessaryrelationshipstocloseadeal,insid-erssay.SomealsochalkupDoyle’sproblemstohisstatusasalameduck.Heoverreachedwhenhe'snotontheballotwhileeveryoneelseisandtriedtoohardwithaLegislaturethat’swaytootimid,oneDemsays.

Jeff Plale Enviros go looking for someone toblameforthedemiseofthe“CleanEnergyJobs Act,” and the South Milwaukee Dembecomesthechiefscapegoat.Healsodrawsaprimaryopponentover the issue,but in-siders say he shouldn’t have too much toworry about come fall. And opposing theCEJA likely bought him some cover fromconservative talk radio, which would haveinevitablyteedoffonhimovertheissuehaditpassedwithhissupport.Whiletheliberalwing of the Dem Party hasn’t always beenenamoredwithPlale,insiderssayhe'sbeenabletobondwiththemoderate-to-conserva-tiveDemsthatmakeupagoodswathofhisdistrict.

Reporters Lawmakers send the guv legislationthat would afford the media new protec-tionsfromhavingtoreveal theirconfiden-tial sources incourt.Theshield lawwouldallow judges to order reporters to discloseconfidential information only when it is“highlyrelevant”toacaseorcriticaltooneparty’s argument. Some complain it willmake it too hard to obtain key informa-tion in certain suits. But media advocatespraisethelegislation,sayingtheprotectionswill help the media in its watchdog role.

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Second Supper April 29, 2010 // 5

Local league offers poker, the legal, low-stress wayBy Adam Bissenadam.bissen@secondsupper.com

On a recent Monday evening at theArena Sports Bar, around 40 people sataroundfelt-toppedpokertables,peeringattheircardsand tossing inchips.Fromthelooksof things, thisshouldprobablybe il-legal.Gamesofchancewithmoneyonthelineare—*wink*wink*—prohibitedbylaw in49 states,butnooneherehas any-thingtohide. ThisgameissanctionedbytheMidwestPoker League, a new organization in theLa Crosse area with eight different gamesaround town. Players pay no entrance feeand buy no chips, but they compete forfinal prizes — including all-expenses-paidtrip to Las Vegas for the winner of nextmonth’sregionalfinal. In return, bar owners pull in a smallcrowd on what’s often a slow night. “Thisis not just a get-people-drunk business. …Wewanttogivethementertainment,”saidTroyTuma,whoworksattheArenaandof-tenjoinsinonthegames. Priortohostingaweeklypokergame,the Arena wasn’t even open on Mondays.Likealotofbars,ithadtriedhostingacashgameforafewpokerplayers,buttheturn-out was low, and with real money on theline,gamblersaren’toftenheavydrinkers. Andtherewasanotherhitch.Hostingapokergamewithmoneyatstakeistechni-callyillegal(althoughtheLaCrossePoliceDepartmentdidn’t returnamessage seek-ingcomment).Dozensofestablishmentsintheareastillhostcashgames,butthere’sal-waysariskforabust.“Thefactofthematteristhere’sa15-yearprisonsentencehangingontopofyourhead,”Tumasaid. The Midwest Poker League officiallybegan in March, although it hosted testgames last November to judge local inter-est.Freepokerleaguesarecommoninmoststates—andespeciallypopular inMinne-sota—buttheCouleeRegionwasslowtocatchon,saidBrentRoraff,theleague’sre-gionalmanager. “It seems like there’s a poker league

of some sort in just about every state inthe country — except for maybe Nevada,because they can get away with it,” Roraffsaid.“Wesawthattherewasaneed,andwewanted to give people the opportunity tocomeinandjustplay.” For a business model, the MidwestPokerLeaguechargesbars$100pernightto host a game, which often lasts aroundthreehours.Playersaregiven1,500worthofchipsjustforwalkingin,butiftheypre-purchase $10 worth of product — usuallyfood or drinks — they are given an extra1,000inchips. MidwestPokerLeaguegamesareheldMonday nights at the Arena Sports Bar,Tuesday nights at Logan Bar, Wednesdaynights at Days Hotel and Sloopy’s AlmaMater,ThursdaynightsattheAdamsStreetPub, Saturday afternoons at Cruz-in Puband Eatery and Sundays at the NorthsideOasisandHowie’s. Over130peoplehaveplayedinleaguepokergames this year,Roraff said.Playerscancompeteatanyandall sites,andrun-ning statistics are tabulated to determineseatsfortheregionalfinalonMay24.Thewinnerofthattournamentwillbegivenair-fareandahotelstayinLasVegas,aswellasentrytoa$10,000satellitetournamentfortheWorldSeriesofPoker. Still, players in the Midwest PokerLeaguerunthegamutfromnovicestotablerats. “I’veplayed the riverboat and theca-sinos, but I like this environment becauseit’slessstressful,”saidDavidRadtke,anac-countant. “You don’t put your money ontheline.Youdon’treallyhaveanythingtolose,whichhelpsalot.” Without any danger of losing one’sshirt,themoodatthepokergamesislightand congenial. Players know each other,and many travel around and play severalgamesaweek. “Ifyouwanttolearntoplay,thisisthewaytodoit,”saidBillPicket,whowasplay-ing last week at the Days Hotel. “It’s free.Youcan’tgetnocheaperthanthat.”

Thursday 4.29

Friday 4.30

Saturday 5.1

KokopelliansSteezThe Smokin’ Bandits

7 Year Anniversary Party!

6// April 29, 2010 Second SupperMUSIC

TheMelismaticsisaMinneapolispoppunk band that has released four albumssince2001.Theband'slatestvideoforthesingle “Digging Deep” is in regular circu-lation on both MTV and Fuse, and theirmusic also has been featured on the tele-vision shows “Laguna Beach,” “The Hills,”and “Windfall.” The band consists of leadsinger, guitarist, and founder Ryan Smith,hiswife(nicknamedPony),whoplaysgui-tarandkeyboardaswellassingingco-leadvocals, bassist Mark Wade and drummerRon Caron. In a recent phone interview,RyanSmithdescribedtheirsoundasrang-ing“fromeverythingfrompop-punktonewwave,withsomepost-rockinfluences.” Thebandreleaseditsfirstalbum,Post-modernRock,in2001,whichtheyrecordedina formermember’smother’sbasement.Soon after, the band signed to SusstonesRecords,whichproducedtheirnexttwoal-bums,NewInfectionandTurnItOn.Afterextensive touring, the band acquired rec-ognition from producer John Fields, whohasworkedwithbandssuchasSwitchfoot,JimmyEatWorld,singerClayAikenandtheJonasBrothers.Fieldsproducedtheband’smostrecenteffort,TheAcidTest,whichwasreleasedthroughCCEntertainment/Koch.When asked about the new album, Smithstated,“thesongsincombinationwiththeproducerthatweworkedwithkindofgaveitamoreslicksoundthanwehadeverhadbefore.” TheAcidTestisa10-songalbumthatneveroncelosesitsmomentum.Theedgy,distorted guitar parts and creative basslinesareeffectivelycounterbalancedbythecatchyvocalsandtastefullyeccentriclyrics,whilethedrumssuccessfullymaintaintheirenergy and inventiveness throughout theentirealbum.Thatbeingsaid,thealbumisalso very synth driven, which adds quite a

bitofdepthandatmospheretothesongs. Thebandisworkingonanewalbum,which Smith described as “kind of dancyandpsychedelic,”aswellassaying“it’salit-tlemoreexperimentalinnature.”Theywillbereleasingthefirstsinglefromthealbum,entitled“YourLoveisaPoison,”sometimeinthenearfuture.“There’sgonnabeamu-sicvideoforit.It’sgonnabeamixtureofacoupleofconcepts,includingTron,”Smithsaid, “It’s gonna be pretty crazy. ... Therearealotofotherelementsinthereaswell.” When asked about the band’s name,Smithsaidhegotitfromtheword“melis-ma,”whichisamusicaltermmeaningasin-gle syllable that is sang melodically acrossseveral different notes. He said the bandhad booked a show and the venue ownerhadgiventhemuntiltheendoftheweektopickoutaname.Onthedayitwasdue,theystilldidn’thaveaname. “Iwas inamusicclass thatday and randomly chose awordoffthetest.”TheyhavebeenTheMelismat-icseversince. Smithalsosaidthebandisexcitedtobeback in theLaCrossearea.“We’re justreally looking forward to getting back. ...We’veplayed[theWarehouse]afewtimesandit’salwaysbeenfun.” The Melismatics are renowned fortheirlivelyandexcitingliveperformances.“Mostpeoplesay[ourshows]areveryhighenergy; we like to put on a show," Smithsaid."We’regonnathrowinsomenewma-terialandplaysomeofouroldersongs....There’salwaysalittlechaosintheshow.”

Warehouse to host punk band with a trippy sideBy Jason CriderContributing writer

WHAT: Melismatics with 1,2,3 Walrus, Yu-kon Rudy and Rogue the WolfWHEN: 6:30 p.m. Saturday, May 1WHERE: The Warehouse, 328 Pearl St.

At a Glance

Second Supper April 29, 2010 // 7

Minneapolispopulation 387,970

DEVIN THE DUDE // MAY 137th Street Entry • $14.50

COHEED AND CAMBRIA // MAY 13First Avenue • $23.50

REBIRTH BRASS BAND // MAY 14The Cabooze • $14

BROOKS & DUNN // MAY 14Xcel Energy Center • $23-$63

KORN // MAY 17First Avenue • $39.75

BARENAKED LADIES // MAY 17Orpheum Theatre • $34-$175

just a roadie awayMUSIC

music directory // April 30 to May 6

FRIDAY,

FREIGHT HOUSE // 107 Vine St.Saner & Gibbons (acoustic pop) • 8 p.m.

HOWIE'S. // 1125 La Crosse St.GB Leighton (rock band) • 9 p.m.

JB'SSPEAKEASY // 717 Rose St.Lolipop Factor, jEHAD, One Man Dad (heavy rock) • 10 p.m.

MYRICK HIXON ECOPARK // 789 Myrick Dr.Hans Mayer (children's musician, Earth Month celebration) • 6:30 p.m.

NIGHTHAWKS TAP // 401 S. Third St.Sh*tty (softball smoker) • 9 p.m.

PEARL STREET BREWERY // 1401 St. Andrew St.Travis Oppelt & Garrett Gilbertson (acoustic show) • 5 p.m.

PIGGY'S BLUES LOUNGE // 501 Front St. S.Poppa Roxy (blues) • 10 p.m

POPCORN TAVERN // 308 S. Fourth St.Steez (Creepfunk) • 10 p.m.

THE ROOT NOTE // 114 4th St. S.The Art Brothas (live painting and per-cussion) • 8:30 p.m.

THE WAREHOUSE // 324 Pearl St.Without Despair, Before We Fall, Be-hind These Eyes, Miss August, Blank Image, Rival Era (rock/punk) • 6 p.m.

THE WATERFRONT TAVERN // 328 Front St.Dan Sebranek (songwriter) • 8 p.m.

April 30

SATURDAY,

ALL-STAR LANES // 4735 Mormon CouleeJoe Cody and Friends (rock) • 8 p.m.

FREIGHT HOUSE // 107 Vine St.Saner & Gibbons (acoustic pop)• 8 p.m.

IMPULSE NIGHT CLUB //214 Main St.F. Stokes, T.U.G.G., Nick Shattuck, Hy-phon (rock & hip-hop) • 9:30 p.m

May 1

THURSDAY,

NIGHTHAWKS TAP // 401 S. Third St.Dave Orr's Damn Jam (open jam) • 10 p.m.

POPCORN TAVERN // 308 S. Fourth St.TBA • 10 p.m.

THE ROOT NOTE // 114 4th St. S.Open Mic • 8 p.m.

THE STARLITE LOUNGE // 222 Pearl St.Kies & Kompanie (jazz) • 8 p.m.

THE WAREHOUSE // 324 Pearl St.16 Volt, Chemlab, Left Spine Down (industrial) • 6:30 p.m.

May 6

If you'd like a little more audio/visual stimulation in your concert-going life, then may we recommend the Art Brothas, who are playing the Root Note this Friday night. Comprised of renowned percussionist The Mighty Joe White and visual artist Brota, the Art Brothas put on a show unlike anything you'll see for a while. While White performs a stomp routine, Brota makes a "reverse painting" on clear Plexiglas, and the result an impresive display of artistic improvisation. For a preview, check out the videos on their MySpace page. The show begins at 8:30 p.m., but come early for a good seat.

SUNDAY,

CONCORDIA BALLROOM // 1129 La Crosse St.New Jolly Swiss Boys (polka) • 1 p.m.

POPCORN TAVERN // 308 S. Fourth St.Som'n Jazz (jazz) • 10 p.m.

May 2

WEDNESDAY,

NIGHTHAWKS TAP // 401 S. Third St.The Bad Axe Jam (gear provided) • 10 p.m.

May 5

MONDAY,

POPCORN TAVERN // 308 S. Fourth St.Shawn's "Roller derby" jam • 10 p.m.

THE WAREHOUSE // 324 Pearl St.Release the Hounds, Let Live (rock/alternative) • 7 p.m.

May 3

TUESDAY,

POPCORN TAVERN // 308 S. Fourth St.Fayme & Casey (acoustic) • 10 p.m.

THE ROOT NOTE // 114 Fourth St. S.Jazz jam • 8:30 p.m.

May 4

JB'SSPEAKEASY // 717 Rose St.Perverse Engineer, Orphan Bloom, Kentucky Belt Fight (rock) • 10 p.m.

NIGHTHAWKS TAP // 401 S. Third St.The King Everything Classic Rock and Blues Review (rock/blues) • 10 p.m.

NEUIE'S VARSITY CLUB // 1920 Ward Ave.Sellout (rock) • 9 p.m.

PIGGY'S BLUES LOUNGE // 501 Front St. S.Poppa Roxy (blues) • 10 p.m

PUMP HOUSE // 119 King St.Willy Porter (Wisconsin pop) • 7:30 p.m.

POPCORN TAVERN // 308 S. Fourth St.The Smokin' Bandits (7 year anniver-sary party) • 10 p.m.

THE ROOT NOTE // 114 4th St. S.Mark Harrod (acoustic) • Noon

THE WAREHOUSE // 324 Pearl St.Melismatics, 1,2,3, Walrus, Yukon Rudy (pop-punk) • 6:30 p.m.

THE WATERFRONT TAVERN // 328 Front St.Dan Sebranek (songwriter) • 8 p.m.

RECOVERY ROOM // 901 7th St. S.Dox Phonic (open jam) • 10 p.m.

VITERBO FINE ARTS CENTER // 929 Jackson St.Stay Tuned ("One stage: Five enter-tainers") • 7:30 p.m.

THE WAREHOUSE // 324 Pearl St.The Higher, Between the Trees, Good-night Caulfield, Jamestown story (pop rock) • 6:30 p.m.

8// April 29, 2010 Second SupperARTS

By Jonathan Majakjonathan.majak@secondsupper.com

This theatre season at UW-La Crosse,thetheatredepartmenthastakenaudiencestoaplethoraofplaces:EnglandinAChrist-masCarol andFrozen, a storybook fantasylandinIntoTheWoods,andnow, intheirproductionofEurydice,audiencesarebeingtakentohell. Well,Hadestobemoreexact.InUW-L’squirkyproductionofSarahRuhl’splay,the story follows the Greek myth of Or-pheus,thegodofmusic,andhisnewbride,Eurydice,whopromptlyendsupdyingandheadingtotheunderworld,atripshemostlydidn’tputonherweddinggiftregistry. Toldinatight,75-minute,one-actstyle,theplayexistsinitsownpurgatory,floatingsomewherebetweendramaandcomedy.Forthe most part, UW-L’s production, underthedirectionofMaryLeonard,keepsafirmgrasp on that nebulous called “dramedy”andtheactorsdeftlyhandletheblend. Though ostensibly a reworking of Or-pheus’storytobetoldfromthepointofviewofEurydice,Eurydicegetslostalittleintheshuffleofthecharacters. As Eurydice's father, Adam Petchelbringsaneasy-goingpaternal charm tohisroleandisabletofindtheperfecttragico-medictone,especiallyinhisscenesoflittle

Review: UW-L's 'Eurydice' a quirky take on Greek dramedy

tonodialogue. Zachary Keenan, as Orpheus, contin-uestoshowoffhisversatilityasanactor,do-inga180fromhisroleasthedim-wittedJackinIntoTheWoods. Garrett Flood, as essentially the ruleroftheunderworld,getsalatedinnerinthisproductionashechewsscenerywithgusto.The character, a sort of demented bastardchild of Dennis the Menace and Pee-WeeHerman,isamadcapbreathoffreshairintheproduction. In their roles as essentially the Greekchorusoftheshow,AmyNelson,ClaireGan-shertandTimMcCarrendonotrestonthefantastic costuming done by Joe Andersonbut instead harness it to create smart andsnide creatures that leave a lasting impres-sion. In the title roleofEurydice,ShannonMcDonalddoesacompetentifslightlystaticjoboftheroleandisn’tdonehugefavorsbythescriptthatkeepshercharacterinadazeforalargechunkoftheshow. In some ways, the biggest star of theshowisthesetdesignwithitstwistyTimBur-tondetailsandamarvelouselevatorwithadownpourofraininside. Overall, its an enjoyable show and itsuniquecharmshouldbeapplauded.

By Jonathan Majakjonathan.majak@secondsupper.com

After a season of some onstage highsandbackstagelows,theLaCrosseCommu-nityTheatredecidedtolooktowardthefu-turewhenithelditsfirstannualopeningoftheseason. Gathered together at Myrick Park’sEcoCenter was a cross section of LCT castmembers,boardmembersandfanstoheartheshowsplannedforthe2010-2011season. According to LCT Artistic DirectorGreg Parmeter, this gala was a consciouschoiceontheLCTtoupthefunfactor. “Everyyearwedosomesortofrolloutevent,usuallyjustsomesortofpressconfer-ence,”Parmeterexplained. Thisyear,hesaid,theLCTdecidedtohavethisstyleofopeningoftheseasonasitwouldbesomethingfunforpatronsofthetheatre. “We hope to make it an every-yearevent,”Parmetersaid. TheLCTbrought inahostofpeopletoannounce theupcomingseason, includ-ing LCT theater president Chuck Roth,La Crosse County Administrator SteveO’Malley,andRep.JenniferSchilling. Thepresentersdidtheirbesttodeliverafewquipsforthecrowd. “I have to read the script,” O’Malleysaid.“Ididn’tremembermylines.”

LCT unveils 2010-2011 season “The environment I work in is some-times the theatre of the absurd,” Schillingsaid. The 2010-2011 season, dubbed the“Season of Possibilities,” will host a strongmixofplaysandmusicals. The patron’s pick for the season isDoubt, about a feud between a nun and apriest when she suspects the charismaticmanofmolestingachild; theplayrecentlywas turned into an Oscar-nominated filmstarringMerylStreep. Themusicals for theseasonaregoingto be odes to vaudeville and murder: Chi-cago and the musical that proved that justbecauseyou’reinagangdoesnotmeanyoucannotsnapyourfingersintime,WestSideStory. Atthepresentation,dancersfromMistyDance Unlimited did a routine to “RazzleDazzle” fromChicagoandJeremyDayandJen Roberdeau, two stars from LCT’s pro-duction of She Loves Me, did a medley ofsongsfromWestSideStory. ThefallproductionwillbeOnGoldenPond, the play whose film adaptation net-tedscreenlegendHenryFondahisonlyOs-car. The winter production will be Almost,Maine, aquirky reworkingof Shakespeare.The holiday production will be It’s a Won-derfulLife:ALiveRadioPlay

avoidplayingthegameofbegginghimtocallafterhe loses interest.Youknowthis,butyoudissgameplayingtogiveyourselfapasstodowhatyouknowdoesn’twork,butworksforyouinthemoment:throwingyourselfataguyandhopingagainsthopeyou’ll stick. (“Hmmm, maybe if I rub mynakedbodywithSuperGlue?”) This hoohah about who you suppos-edlywere tohim inapast lifeonlyhelpsdistract you from how you keep comingback in thisone: as abugunderaman’sshoe.Dotheworktofilltheemptyplacesin yourself so you won’t continue thesedesperate attempts to plug them with aboyfriend. Only when you’re okay aloneareyoufittostartlookingforcompany.Atthat point, “playing the game” will comenaturally. You won’t have guys calling atthelastminutebecauseyou’llseemlikeagirlwho’dbebusy—toobusyhavingself-respect to make like Domino’s and haveyourselfdelivered.Forgetwhetheraguy’sinto astrology; it’s whether you have dig-nitythatdeterminesyourfatewithhim—notthefactthatyouwerebothbornwhenCapricornwasin7-Eleven.

Flat Attire How about my date this past Saturday? He has the potential to be really cute, but I absolute-ly despise his bland style. How do you approach making someone over?

— Bothered

Does that someoneneedanew shirtor anewhead?Once youhaveabitof arelationship with a guy, you can flatterhim into a better shirt. (“You know, thatCosby sweater would look so much moreattractiveinthedumpster!”)But,onafirstdate,ifyou’reobsessedwithtearingaguy’sclothesoff,itshouldbebecauseyouwantto see him naked, and not just for thatbrief moment before he gets into some-thingthatmeetsyourdresscode.It’spos-sibleyouaren’treadyforarelationship,sonoguyisrightforyou—oryou’resodes-perate for a relationship that you’ll takeanyguy,thentrytoturnhimintoaguyyoureallywant.Peoplesaystyleisasuperficialthing—andit is,unless it’sabigdealtoyou.Ultimately,itisn’tgoingtoworkwithaguyifyourfirstdatefantasyis“You’dbesoperfect…ifonlywe lived in aworldoftotaldarkness”(“Onceyougopitchblack,younevergoback”).

Amy Alkon's just-published book, "I see rude people: One woman's battle to beat some manners into impolite society" is available from McGraw-Hill ($16.95).

Got a problem?WriteAmyAlkon,atAdviceAmy@aol.com. (c) 2010, Amy Al-kon,allrightsreserved.

Bodhi Call This man I dated for two weeks is sensi-tive, spiritual, talks with trees, appreciates astrology — basically, my ideal match. But, I think I messed up, repeating bad patterns: I kissed him first and had sex too soon. He called twice at 9:30 p.m., wanting me to come over and see a movie, but we ended up naked again. I asked him out twice — but only because he often waits till the last minute to decide any-thing. (I don’t know why one has to play a game of letting the man call.) I also asked if it was safe to open my heart to him. He said, “Why don't you ask your heart that?” That was the last I saw of him. I called him, and he said he didn’t “feel a romantic thing,” and that I’d shared my feelings too fast. Help!! We had a past life together where I was the man and he was the woman, which he himself mentioned, yet now he’s not even sure we can be friends.

— Distressed

No. You didn’t. Two weeks in, youdidn’treallyaskaguy,“Is itsafetoopenmy heart to you?” Answer: “Only if youopen your front door at the exact sametimesoIcangetthehelloutofhere.” Forget the old “anything worth hav-ingisworthwaitingfor.”You’reawomaninahurry.Anythingworthhavingisworthcornering like a trapped animal. Unfor-tunately, guythink doesn’t work on thattimetable. Yeah, he might be sensitive,spiritual, and chatty with trees, but he’sstill a guy. The usual rules are in effect.Forbestresults,youdon’tkissaguyfirst,you don’t initiate dates, and you don’tchirp“I’llberightover!”whenhecallsat9:30foramoviedateat9:35.What’splay-ing?Surprise,surprise,cable’sonthefritz,buthe’sgotacellphonecamera,andhecouldshootyoutwodoingit. There’s much sneering about gameplaying as a form of deception, but it’smoreofasocialintelligencetest—awayofsignalingpeoplethatyou’reworthhav-ingorhiring. Ina job interview, itprob-ably means showing up in a dress andheels insteadofyourbraandunderwearand clown shoes. In dating, “playing agameof letting themancall” ishowyou

The Advice GoddessBy Amy Alkonamy.alkon@secondsupper.com

ONLINE EXCLUSIVE"Five Days in the Dark"

Nick Cabreza's insightful, 2,789 word review of the Wisconsin Film Festivalwww.secondsupper.com

Second Supper April 29, 2010 // 9YOUR GUIDE TO CONSUMPTION

The Best Food & Drink Specials in Town To advertise here, call (608) 782-7001 or e-mail us at advertising@secondsupper.com.

LOCATION SUNDAY MONDAY TUESDAY WEDNESDAY THURSDAY FRIDAY SATURDAYARENA 107 3rd St. S.782-1883

Midwest Poker League 7 p.m. Closed Wyld Wednesday: $2 Jumbo UV, mixers $1.50 Coronas

Ladies' Night, $5 Long Island pitchers

$1 Cherry Bombs, $1 Keystone Light silos

$1 Cherry Bombs, $1 Keystone Light silos

BODEGA BREW PUB122 4th St.782-0677

$2 BBQ Pork Sliders 2-Fers, Buy any regularly priced food item and get one of equal or lesser value for free

Fish Tacos: 1 / $2.50, 2 / $5.00, 3 / $6.50.

BROTHERS306 Pearl St. 784-0522

Closed $2.50 Coors vs. Keystone pitchers. All specials 9 p.m. to close

AUC2D: $5, domestic taps, rail mix-ers, Long Islands. All specials 9 p.m. to close

10-cent wings, $1 Miller High Life bottles, $1.50 rail mixers; $2.50 call drinks. All specials 9 p.m. to close.

AUC2D: $5, domestic taps, rail mix-ers and Long Islands. Wristband Night: $2.50 SoCo & Jack. All spe-cials 9 p.m. to close.

$3 3 Olives mixers, $3 Mojitos, $2 Cherry Bombs, $1 Bazooka Joe's; FAC: $3 domestic pitchers, micro/import taps, anything that pours. 4-9 p.m.

$3 Bacardi mixers, $3 Mojitos, $2 Cherry bombs, $1 Bazooka Joe's. All specials 9 p.m. to close.

FEATURESW3923 State Highway 16786-9000

Free beer 5:30-6:30; Free wings 7:30-8:30, Free bowling after 9

Taco buffet 11-2;$1 Pabst bottles and $1 bowling after 9

All you care to eat pizza buffet, 11-2 All you care to eat fish fry 4-10; un-limited Glow-N-Bowl $9.99

Prime rib dinner 4-10; unlimited Glow-N-Bowl $9.99

HOWIE’S1125 La Crosse St. 784-7400

Happy hour 4 to 9 p.m.; 9 p.m. to close: Night Before Class - $3 pitch-ers of the beast

9 p.m. to close: $3.50 domestic pitchers

9 p.m. to close: $1 rails, $2.50 pitch-ers, beer pong

$5 all you can drink 9 p.m. to close: $1.25 rails, $1.75 bottles/cans

9 p.m. to close: $2 Captain mixers, $2 bottles/cans, $3 Jager bombs

9 p.m. to close: $2 Bacardi mixers, $2 domestic pints, $1.50 shots blackberry brandy

IMPULSE214 Main St. 782-6010

Closed Closed Karaoke 9 p.m.-Close;Happy Hour daily 5-8

Wine & martini night;Happy Hour daily 5-8

18+ night (1st and 3rd Thursday of each month);Happy Hour daily 5-8

$25 open bar package, 11 p.m. to close: domestic/import beer, rail, call drinks, martinis; Happy Hour daily 5-8

Happy Hour daily 5-8

JB’S SPEAKEASY717 Rose St.796-1161

$1.75 domestic bottles SIN Night $1.75 domestic bottles Happy Hour 5 to 7 p.m. Happy Hour 5 to 7 p.m. Happy Hour 5 to 7 p.m. Happy Hour 5 to 7 p.m.

MIDWEST POKER LEAGUEmidwestpokerleague@mail.com

Northside Oasis620 Gillette St., 3 p.m.Howie's1128 La Crosse St., 8 p.m.

Arena 620 107 S. 3rd St.8 p.m.

Logan Bar1400 Caledonia St. 6 p.m.

Sloopy's Alma Mater163 Copeland Ave., 8 p.m.Days Hotel101 Sky Harbor Drive, 8 p.m.

Adams Street Pub1200 11th St. S.7:30 p.m.

Visit www.midwestpokerleague.com

for league updates.

Cruz-in Pub and EateryW5450 Keil Coulee Road, 3 p.m.

SCHMIDTY’S3119 State Road788-5110

$1.79 burger (after 8 p.m.)Breakfast 8 a.m. to 2 p.m.

Hat Night: Buy 1 drink, get 1 free w/ hat (4:30 to close); $1.50 chili dogs (after 8 p.m.)

Rail drinks $2 (4:30 to close); After 8 p.m. specials: $5 skewer of shrimp,l $1.79 burger, $1.50 chili dogs

Buckets of beer $10, Boston Bobby's drummies 10 for $2 (4:30 to close), $1.79 burger (after 8 p.m.)

Margaritas $4 (Straw, rasp, mango, peach and reg); After 8 p.m. specials: $5 skewer of shrimp, $1.79 burger

Breakfast 8 a.m. to 2 p.m.

SLOOPY'S ALMA MATER163 Copeland Ave. 785-0245

$2 can beer (2-6 p.m.) $11 buckets of beers (6-close)

$2 can beer (2-6 p.m.) 12" pizza: $8.99 up to 5 toppings (4-close)

Wings, Wings, Wings... $2 off 14: pizza, $2 can beer (2-6 p.m.)

Ladies night, 2 for 1 drinks (6-close), $2 can beer (2-6 p.m.)

Friday Fish, $2 can beer (2-6) 2 for 1 pints/pitches w/ student ID over 21

SPORTS NUT801 Rose St. 784-1811

Buck Burgers Tacos $1.25 15-cent wings $8.99 12-ounce T-bone 15-cent wings

THE CAVALIER LOUNGE114 5th Ave. N. 782-2111

$1.50 taps 6 to 8 p.m. All Mojitos $5

THE LIBRARY123 3rd St.784-8020

Sunday Fun Day - Wristband Night Half price tequilla, $1 domestic taps and rails

Karaoke, $2 double rails & all bottles Beer Pong Tourney and wristband night

$3 Bacardi mixers, $3 Jumbo Long Island Iced Teas

$3 Jumbo Long Island Iced Teas, $3 3 Olives mixers

TOP SHOTS137 4th St.782-6622

$5 Pitchers/$2 bottles of Miller products (11-4pm)$2 Corona Bottles, $2 Kilo Kai Mixers , $3 Bloodys (7-1AM)

$1.75 Miller/Bud Light Taps, $2.25 MIcro/Craft Taps, $2.50 Cherry Bombs (7-1AM)

$1.75 Rails, $1.50 Domestic Taps, $3.50 Jager Bombs (7-1AM)

$2 domestic bottles, $2.50 Skyy/Absolut mixers, $2 Dr. shots (7-1am)

5 Domestic Bottles for $10, $5 Micro/Import Bottles $11.50, $7 Micro/Craft Pitchers (7-1AM)

$2 Captain Mixers, $2. Long Island Mixers, $3 Effen Vodka Mixers (7-1AM)

$5 Miller/Bud Light Pitchers, $2.25 Leinies Bottles (7-1AM)

TRAIN STATION BBQ601 St. Andrew St. 781-0005

Ask for great eats 11 a.m. to 3 p.m., extra side with sandwich; 4 to 9 p.m., $1 off rib dinner

Special varies 11 a.m. to 3 p.m., Barn burner $7.95; 4 to 9 p.m., Hobo dinner (serves two) $30.95

11 a.m. to 3 p.m., Chicken on fire $7.95; 4 to 9 p.m., Bones and bris-kets $13.95

One-half chicken three bones $12.95

WHO'S ON THIRD126 3rd St. N.782-9467

Happy Hour until 10 p.m.$1.50 domestic taps, $2 rails from 10 to close

$1 taps of PBR, $1 rails $3 call doubles, $2 Bud products

Ladies' Night: $2 top shelf, $1 Pink TacosEveryone: $2.50 bombs, $2 taps, $3 Jack/Captain doubles

$8.50 Fish Bowls, $2 Miller products $1 off Three Olives, $2 domestic taps

10// April 29, 2010 Second Supper

ACROSS1 Hot spot offering5 Author Jong10 Like some water or lemonade14 Milky gemstone15 Lose it and run amok16 Square footage, e.g.17 Cabo ___ (Sammy Hagar tequila brand)18 Adrenal, for instance19 Closes a jacket20 Loretta Swit's nick-name, with "The"?23 Jimmy Eat World genre24 Ending for spat or form25 Tried to buzz off of a fertilizer ingredient?34 White from fright35 Not quite right?

36 Rock's ___ Speed-wagon37 Heath bar competi-tor38 Minute Maid Park player39 Kenya's first prime minister Kenyatta40 ___ in "uncle"41 "___ Up Style" (Blu Cantrell single)42 Word before book or opera43 Meat-and-potatoes dish used to hone your culinary skills?46 Off-roader of sorts47 Part of many Arab names48 Scary creatures that can't be bought with plastic?56 Assist a criminal57 How taboos are

with most people58 Barney's hangout60 Guam, for one: abbr.61 Macbeth was one62 Yemen neighbor63 "Caprica" network64 Subject that may require a permission slip65 Win over

DOWN 1 "That's so cool!"2 Product that de-buted April 3, 20103 Race car driver Teo4 It follows "And" in a Beatles title5 It might get spiked in December6 Part7 Mosque figure8 "Please?"9 Totals10 Type of suit for a chemical spill11 Operatic solo12 Weightlifter's units13 Morse code bit21 "You won't believe the mess ___..."22 Fruit in a gin fizz25 Fill the tank26 Schindler of "Schindler's List"27 Yonder objects28 "___ la vista, baby!"29 Large jazz combo30 Olympic "Flying Finn" Paavo31 Parfumerie's at-

Burn After ReadingIt's what remains

By Matt Jones

Answers to April 22 puzzle

Repeat Offenders: It's just overkill

CONSUMPTIONMaze Efflux By Erich Boldt

Verrückte Stadt German PilsGreat Dane Pub & Brewing CompanyMadison, Wisconsin

Appearance: 7

Aroma: 9

Taste: 9

Mouthfeel: 7

Drinkability: 10

Total: 42

The eighth-annual Between the BluffsBeer, Wine and Cheese Festival went offwithoutahitchthisweekend,asorganizerscontinuetosmoothoutwrinklesanddevel-oponeofthefinertastingsintheMidwest.WhilepreviousBTBscouldbegenerallyclas-sifiedascluster-likesituations,thisyear’sfestwaswiselyspreadoutacrosstheOktoberfestgroundswithmultipletentsthateasedcon-gestionandshortenedlines.Moreover, twolocal bands, the Smokin’ Bandits and theNew Jazz Infidels, commandedanoutdoorstageandmadethefestivalatreatforallthesenses.Andtherewasbeer,too!Atleast37breweries,12wineriesandfivecheesemakersofferedup theirwares.Onceagain,home-townheroPearlStreetBrewerywasvotedthefestival’s favorite,butIpreferredtosamplebrewsIcan’tfindinLaCrosse—soImadea few stops by the Great Dane, a belovedMadisonbrewpubwhosebeershaveyettobe bottled. Their Imperial IPA may have

The Beer Review

beenmy favoritebeerat the festival,but itranoutbeforeIrememberedtotakenotes.Thankfully,IalsoadoredthisclassicGermanpilsnerandscribbledafewthoughtswhileinthePorta-Pottyline. In a festival that was heavy on ales,the Verrückte Stadt German Pils came offas a mighty refreshing lager. It poured alight straw color, liter-ally see-through, withapurewhiteheadthatretained good lacing.Lifting my samplerglass,Igotawhiffofaperfectpils.Therewerestrawnoteswithabaseof honey, all toppedwith a fine bouquet ofnoble hops. The tastewas also an excellentdisplayofthestyle,withadaintinessatthefrontofthetonguethatgavewaytosweetmaltsandburstsoflemongrass.I couldn’t find the alcohol content any-where,butthisseemedlikeasessionbeerora “lawnmowerbeer”or something you justwant tosuckdownonabeautifulday.Andtruly itwas. I can’twait todoBetween theBluffsBeer,WineandCheeseFestivalagainin2011,thoughImaymakeacouplestopsbytheGreatDanebeforetheyearisthough.DidImentionthere’soneintheairport?.

— Adam Bissen

traction32 Long rides?33 Turner's title film buddy38 Ducts39 His character was killed off after he left "Good Times"41 Sir Topham ___ ("Thomas the Tank Engine" boss)42 "Money Honey" Maria Bartiromo's network44 Bear claw, for one45 Made noises from the pen48 Yoga class supplies49 Follow the rules50 Foamy toy brand51 Architect Ludwig Mies van der ___52 Otis Redding record label53 Actress Skye of "Say Anything"54 "___ friend you are!"55 Get better59 Andy Samberg show, for short

For answers, call (900) 226-2800, 99 cents per minute. Or to bill to a credit card, call (800) 655-6549. Reference puzzle #0462.

Second Supper April 29, 2010 // 11THE LAST WORD

Y Marks the SpotBy Brett Emersonbrett.emerson@secondsupper.com

Downtown La Crosse, above Fayzes - 782-6622

$1.75 - Miller/Bud Taps$2.25 Micro/Craft Taps$2.50 Cherry Bombs(7-1am)

$5 Miller Lite/Bud Light Pitchers$2.25 Leinies Bottles (7-1am)

top shots joke of the week

Good People, Good Drinks, Good Times

SUNDAY TUESDAY THURSDAYMONDAY WEDNESDAY FRIDAY$5 Pitchers $2 Bottles of Miller Products (11-4 pm)$2 Corona Bottles$2 Kilo Kai Mixers $3 Bloody’s (7-1am)

$1.75 Rails$1.50 Domestic Taps$3.50 Jager Bombs(7-1am)

$2 Domestic Bottles$2.50 Skyy/AbsoluteMixers$2 Dr. Shots (7-1am)

5 Domestic Bottles 4 $10$5 Micro/Import Bottles$11.50, $7 Micro/CraftPitchers (7-1am)

$2 Captain Mixers$2 Long Islands$3 E�en VodkaMixers (7-1am)

Check outour new Beers

on Tap!

$2.00 - 1 Player, $3.00 - 2 Players50 Cents Off Drinks, $1 Off Pitchers

How many Deadheads does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None, they just wait for it to burn out and follow it around for 30 years"

SATURDAY

Thispastweekwasdark.Tothink,itwasmostlybecauseofacartoon. By now most people have heard some-thingaboutthepassive-aggressivedeaththreatsleveledagainstthecreatorsofSouthParkfromthe Web site Revolution Muslim, but let mecatch up those out of the loop. The contro-versyarosefromthecartoon’s200thepisode,abrilliantpieceofsatireinwhicheverycelebritywhom the showhasever lampoonedbandedtogether to abduct the prophet Mohammadandabsorbhislifeforce,inordertobecomeimmunefrommockery.Theshowoncemoreridiculed the public’s fear of Islamic funda-mentalism by hiding the prophet from view,puttinghiminabearcostumeatshow’send.Inoneoftheepisode’sbestmoments,Buddha

showedthetotalhypocrisyofthisacquiescencebyviolentlysnortingalineofcocaine,tolittlereaction.The storywasmeant tobe resolvedinthenextepisode,butresolutionneverreallycame. ThisiswhereRevolutionMuslim,aNewYork-basedsoapboxforwannabeal-Qaedamil-itants,comesin.Oneofthesite’scontributors,writingasAbuTalhahal-Amrikee,deliveredathinlyveiledthreatagainstSouthParkcreatorsMatt Stone and Trey Parker, saying that they"willprobablywinduplikeTheoVanGoghforairing this show.” For those unfamiliar, TheoVan Gogh was a Dutch filmmaker murderedbyanIslamicfundamentalist,butofcourseal-Amrikeestoppedshortofactuallycondoningviolence, saying thathewas justpointingouttherealityof thesituation.Right.So topara-phrase his statement: “Dudes, you’re prob-ablygonnagetshoteighttimes,thengetyourthroatcut,thengetstabbedabunchoftimesinthechest.Justsayin’.” Furtherconfirmingthepost’sstatusasaterroristthreatwastheinclusionofvideoser-monsofpreacherscallingforthedeathofallwho insult Allah or Mohammed. Al-AmrikeewentontogivetheaddressesofbothComedyCentralandSouthParkStudiosandpostedalinktoanarticlegivingdetailsofParker’sandStone’shouse.Itwassaidthatthiswasasacalltoprotest—butit’sobviouswhatkindofpro-testisbeingcalledfor. Even better was an attempt at clarifica-tionpostedonRevolutionMuslim’sblog.Thelong-windedstatement—whichreaffirmsthesite’scombativeposition—endswithaquote

byOsamabinLaden,ofallpeople:“Ifthereisnocheckinthefreedomofyourwords,thenletyourheartsbeopentothefreedomofouractions.” This quote might have sounded morediplomatic, if one of its author’s forms ofprotesthadn’tbeenCRASHINGAIRPLANESINTOHUGEF***INGBUILDINGS. But in spite of this, Revolution Muslimgot itsway.ComedyCentral—now theNev-ille Chamberlain of an already gutless enter-tainment industry — heavily censored SouthPark’s follow-up episode and bleeped out allmention of Mohammed, as well as bleepingtheentireendingmonologueaboutnotlivinginterrorandfear,appropriately.Theepisodewas shown only once and was then buriedalongside its predecessor and a previous epi-sode that fullydepictedMohammedwithinaleagueofreligioussuperheroes.ComedyCen-tralutterlycavedin. Idon’tthinkI’moverreactingwhenIsay:TERRORISTSWON. Reaction to this madness has been di-verse.Theusual“USA!”chanterscontinuetowaveflagslikecrucifixesandfailtodistinguishthedifferencebetweenMuslimsandAssholes.AfewpocketsoftheInternethavebecomede-votedtodrawingMohammed,anicedefianceintheorybutalsoacertainsourceofcollateraldamage beyond the Islamic fringe. Yet manypeoplehave taken thehigh roadandplacedthe blame where it belongs, attempting toavoidturningthisintoamatterofjingoism.Assuch,RevolutionMuslim’sWeb sitehasbeenrenderedalmostunusableduetohackersris-

ingasone,whichseemsfitting. It’s typical of us to delegate the enact-ingof justiceand freedomto lawmakersandpeoplewithguns,butthat’snothowfreedomworks.It’sanindividualresponsibility,evenforcorporateexecutivespresentingasillycartoon.Inthis,theoldbullyingruleapplies:themoreyougivein,themorethatwillbetakenfromyou.Andanygroup,culture,ornationisonlyasstrongasitsweakestmember. But here’s one thing to consider: Howmanysacredcowsdowehave?Turnthetables.How would Americans react to crass jokesaboutabortion,childmolesters,theHolocaustoreven9/11?Theanswerbeyondthisanswerisnottoduckandcoverortoflipoutateveryinsult. It’s todevelop thicker skin, tobe self-confidentenoughtotranscendtheopinionsofothers.Whenonelooksforafight,oneusuallyfindsit. I’ve spent the past week growing moreandmoreenragedwitheachconcession,notknowingwhat todo in response. I endedupjoiningtheDrawMohammedcrowdandmak-ingtheleastoffensiveMohammedever,astickfigurewithasmilyface,waving.Onlythenamebelowhimgavemyprophetaway.Iwasneitherproudnorashamedofit,butitwasn’tenough. So I went on Revolution Muslim’s blog,tothebinLaden-quoting“clarification”of itsposition.Leavingmynameandemailaddress,Ileftacomment. “Iamnotafraidofyou,”itread.

12// April 29, 2010 Second Supper

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Mike Whelan

Joe Bultman

Catherine Moore

Michael Blair

Inks, Images & Fonts : Cyan, Magenta, Yellow, Black

USCell_Day2_010710_3428.jpg (RGB; 205 ppi; 35%), C6_dynamic_slate_newsprint.psd (CMYK; 156 ppi; 191.25%), USC_believe_std_news_CMYK.eps, USC-PRD-10-018_4C.eps (CMYK; 693 ppi; 8.86%), USC-PRD-09-257_4C_DAYTONA.psd (CMYK; 781 ppi; 8.41%), USC-PRD-10-014_4C.eps (CMYK; 747 ppi; 8.62%)

Berthold Akzidenz Grotesk (Medium Condensed, Light Condensed), SanukOT (Regular, Bold), Frutiger (47 Light Condensed), Matrix II Script USC (Reg, Bold), Rosewood (Fill)

Inks, Images & Fonts Cont'd :

4C

None9.5" x 11.5"NoneNone1" = 1" @ 100%

100%4/16/10TP04See media rotation

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Eurographics 39383 Version:01 03-29-10 mp

Things we want you to know: New two-year agreement (subject to early termination fee) and credit approval required. A $30 activation fee may apply. Regulatory Cost Recovery Fee applies; this is not a tax or government-required charge. Additional fees, taxes, terms, conditions and coverage areas apply and vary by plan, service and phone. Use of service constitutes acceptance of the terms of our Customer Service Agreement. See store for details or visit uscellular.com. Promotional Phone subject to change. U.S. Cellular Visa Debit Card issued by MetaBank pursuant to a license from Visa U.S.A. Inc. Allow 10–12 weeks for processing. Card does not have cash access and can be used at any merchant location that accepts Visa Debit Cards. Card valid for 120 days after issued. Mobile Internet Plans start at $14.95 per month. Smartphone Plans start at $24.95 per month. Application and data network usage charges may apply when accessing applications. BOGO: Buy one handset and get a second handset for free. Mail-in rebate and activation required on each handset. Free Incoming Calls are not deducted from package minutes and are available only when receiving calls in your calling area. Kansas Customers: In areas in which U.S. Cellular receives support from the Federal Universal Service Fund, all reasonable requests for service must be met. Unresolved questions concerning services availability can be directed to the Kansas Corporation Commission Office of Public Affairs and Consumer Protection at 1-800-662-0027. BlackBerry, RIM, Research In Motion, SureType and related trademarks, names and logos are the property of Research In Motion Limited and are registered and/or used in the U.S. and countries around the world. Used under license from Research In Motion Limited. Limited-time offer. Trademarks and trade names are the property of their respective owners. Mobile Broadband on 3G Network only available with select handsets. Users can expect an average download speed of 768Kbps and an average upload speed of 200Kbps. ©2010 U.S. Cellular.

Let us help you find a location: visit uscellular.com or call 1-888-BUY-USCC

USC-PRD-10-018

USC-PRD-10-014USC-PH010-046

Only U.S. Cellular® gives you Free Incoming Calls, Texts and Pix from anyone on any phone or network at any time. Enjoy them on our 3G Network.

answer frEELY. LITERALLY.

SAMSUNG FREEFORMTM

FREEAfter $50 mail-in rebate that comes as a Visa® Debit Card. Requires new 2-yr. agmt. and 3-mo. Mobile Internet Plan. $30 act. fee may apply.

BLACKBERRY® CURVETM

8530 SMARTPHONE

get one freewhen you buy one

for $2995After $70 mail-in rebates that come as Visa Debit Cards. Requires new 2-yr. agmts. and Smartphone Plans. $30 act. fees may apply.

USC-PRD-10-048