volume 15, no. 4 350 shady lane drive, norwalk, …s issue 2017 - all... · trucker imprint norwalk...

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TRUCKER IMPRINT NORWALK HIGH SCHOOL Volume 15, No. 4 350 Shady Lane Drive, Norwalk, OH Tuesday, February 14, 2017 By Madeline Roche On February 14, people around the world think about love and significant others, on a holi- day known as Valentine’s Day. This is a holiday that many people say they either enjoy or despise, usually depending on if they’re in a relationship or not. What most people don’t know is how this holiday started or why they celebrate it. “The Catholic Church recog- nizes at least three different saints named Valentine or Valentinus, all of whom were martyred,” ac- cording to the History.com web- site. There are several versions of the stories tied to that name. One of them was a priest in Rome and when the emperor at that time banned marriage for young men, Valentine continued to perform marriages secretly. He was put to death once the emper- or found out about these secret marriages. Another legend is that Valen- tine was killed for helping Chris- tians escape Roman prisons. One tale included a love story be- tween a prisoner named Valen- tine and a girl, possibly the jail- er’s daughter. He was sentenced to death and before being execut- ed, he wrote her a letter and signed it “from your Valentine,” which is an expression people still use. “Although the truth behind the Valentine legends is murky, the stories all emphasize his appeal as a sympathetic, heroic and– most importantly–romantic fig- ure,” History.com said. The website adds that alt- hough the date may have been picked in honor of the anniver- sary of Valentine’s death, it may also have been chosen in order to “Christianize” a pagan cele- bration called “Lupercalia.” This ancient Roman festival took place every February 15 to honor several gods associated with fertility and nature. The traditions of this festival may be surprising. Roman priests would sacrifice a goat and a dog and then cut the goat’s hide into strips, which were dipped in blood and taken to the streets. The hide was used to slap women and fields, since it was believed to make them more fertile. The women would then put their names in a urn and single men in the town would choose a name to be paired up with. Most of these resulted in marriage. Lupercalia was banned at the end of the fifth century and Pope Gelasius decided that February 14 would be known as St. Valen- tine’s Day. In France and England, Febru- ary 14 begins the bird mating season, which adds romantic as- pects to the day. In 1415, the Duke of Orleans wrote a valentine to his wife while he was a prisoner in the Tower of London. History.com said, “this is the oldest known valentine still in existence today.” Modern traditions usually in- clude exchanging “valentines,” which are typically, candy, cards or teddy bears and possibly a night out. By Logan Hurst and Madeline Roche Every couple has some kind of story as to how they met, their first date or their first impression of their significant other. Wheth- er or not these stories are funny, cute or just awkward, some teach- ers at NHS have some pretty in- teresting memories with their spouses to share. Science teacher Janet Koch met her husband, Curtis, in 1979 at a party during her freshman year of college. She said she saw him sitting with crossed legs, wearing leather pants and a red afro. He offered her a drink. “I thought ‘that man is gay!’ and walked right by him,” Koch said. Then she saw him in one of her classes and things started to change. “We walked home from my psych 101 class the next day and it’s been sheer poetry ever since,” Koch said. She said they did a lot of group dating, but their first real date was dinner at his apartment, where he made her pork chops and salad. After kissing him goodnight one night, Koch said she realized she loved him. “He proposed while I was deathly ill,” Koch said, after tell- ing the story that she was very sick with the flu and he took her to a hotel and popped the ques- tion while they were sitting on the couch, although she felt misera- ble. Her favorite thing about her husband is, “he is my best friend.” They have been married for 32 years. Secretary Rebecca Chapin and her husband Keith spent two years da- ting, and will have been mar- ried for 46 years this March. Chapin and her husband both lived on farms, and his ex- cuse to meet her was that he was coming over to help her dad on the farm. Their first date was to a drive-in movie, and her first im- pression of him was that he was just a very nice guy. Keith “popped the question” after a day at Cedar Point. Chapin says that his kindness is still her favorite thing about him. English teacher Amie Swope met her husband Jeffrey working as a par- amedic at Cedar Point during the summers. Towards the end of their third summer of working together, they went to get burgers after work one day. Swope said they had never pre- viously acknowledged each other. “I don’t know what happened from there,” Swope said, adding that she had previously judged him based on his friends. The couple met in 1989. Before Jeffrey pro- posed, he told her that he had spent a lot of money on something to scare her; she thought he had splurged on a new computer. It turned out to be a diamond en- gagement ring. They got married in 1993. Swope said she loves his sense of humor, but sometimes finds his horrendous spelling hard to over- come. She recalls the time he wrote her a note and called her a “sweatheart” rather than a “sweetheart.” First date with mate Started from Lupercalia, now it’s here My heart!! Submitted photo Science teacher Janet Koch spends time with her husband at a "Rock on the Dock” in 1983. Submitted photo Koch kisses her husband on the cheek on vacation in California in 2015. Submitted photo English teacher Amie Swope poses with her hus- band, Jeffrey, on their wedding day in 1993. Submitted photo Secretary Rebecca Chapin and her husband Keith celebrate their 25th anniversary. Submitted Photo Chapin and her husband smile for the camera on their wedding day. Submitted photo The Chapins pose for a picture.

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TRUCKER IMPRINT NORWALK

HIGH SCHOOL

Volume 15, No. 4 350 Shady Lane Drive, Norwalk, OH Tuesday, February 14, 2017

By Madeline Roche

On February 14, people around the world think about love and significant others, on a holi-day known as Valentine’s Day.

This is a holiday that many people say they either enjoy or despise, usually depending on if they’re in a relationship or not.

What most people don’t know is how this holiday started or why they celebrate it.

“The Catholic Church recog-nizes at least three different saints named Valentine or Valentinus,

all of whom were martyred,” ac-cording to the History.com web-site. There are several versions of the stories tied to that name.

One of them was a priest in Rome and when the emperor at that time banned marriage for young men, Valentine continued to perform marriages secretly. He was put to death once the emper-or found out about these secret marriages.

Another legend is that Valen-tine was killed for helping Chris-tians escape Roman prisons. One tale included a love story be-

tween a prisoner named Valen-tine and a girl, possibly the jail-er’s daughter. He was sentenced to death and before being execut-ed, he wrote her a letter and signed it “from your Valentine,” which is an expression people still use.

“Although the truth behind the Valentine legends is murky, the stories all emphasize his appeal as a sympathetic, heroic and–most importantly–romantic fig-ure,” History.com said.

The website adds that alt-hough the date may have been

picked in honor of the anniver-sary of Valentine’s death, it may also have been chosen in order to “Christianize” a pagan cele-bration called “Lupercalia.”

This ancient Roman festival took place every February 15 to honor several gods associated with fertility and nature.

The traditions of this festival may be surprising.

Roman priests would sacrifice a goat and a dog and then cut the goat’s hide into strips,

which were dipped in blood and taken to the streets. The hide was used to slap women and fields, since it was believed to make them more fertile. The women would then put their names in a urn and single men in the town would choose a name to be paired up with. Most of these resulted in marriage.

Lupercalia was banned at the end of the fifth century and Pope Gelasius decided that February 14 would be known as St. Valen-tine’s Day.

In France and England, Febru-ary 14 begins the bird mating season, which adds romantic as-pects to the day.

In 1415, the Duke of Orleans wrote a valentine to his wife while he was a prisoner in the Tower of London. History.com said, “this is the oldest known valentine still in existence today.”

Modern traditions usually in-clude exchanging “valentines,” which are typically, candy, cards or teddy bears and possibly a night out.

By Logan Hurst and Madeline Roche

Every couple has some kind of story as to how they met, their first date or their first impression of their significant other. Wheth-er or not these stories are funny, cute or just awkward, some teach-ers at NHS have some pretty in-teresting memories with their spouses to share.

Science teacher Janet Koch met her husband, Curtis, in 1979 at a party during her freshman year of college.

She said she saw him sitting with crossed legs, wearing leather pants and a red afro. He offered her a drink.

“I thought ‘that man is gay!’ and walked right by him,” Koch said.

Then she saw him in one of her classes and things started to change.

“We walked home from my psych 101 class the next day and it’s been sheer poetry ever since,” Koch said.

She said they did a lot of group dating, but their first real date was dinner at his apartment, where he made her pork chops and salad.

After kissing him goodnight one night, Koch said she realized she loved him.

“He proposed while I was deathly ill,” Koch said, after tell-ing the story that she was very sick with the flu and he took her to a hotel and popped the ques-tion while they were sitting on the couch, although she felt misera-ble.

Her favorite thing about her husband is, “he is my best friend.”

They have been married for 32 years.

Secretary Rebecca Chapin and her husband Keith spent two

years da-ting, and will have been mar-ried for 46 years this March. Chapin and her husband both lived on farms, and his ex-cuse to

meet her was that he was coming over

to help her dad on the farm. Their first date was to a drive-in movie, and her first im-pression of him was that he was just a very nice guy. Keith “popped the

question” after a day at Cedar Point.

Chapin says that his kindness is still her favorite thing about him.

English teacher Amie Swope met her husband Jeffrey working as a par-amedic at Cedar Point during the summers.

Towards the end of their third summer of working together, they went to get burgers after work one day. Swope said they had never pre-viously acknowledged each other.

“I don’t know what happened from there,” Swope said, adding that she had previously judged him based on his friends.

The couple met in 1989.

Before Jeffrey pro-posed, he told her that he had spent a lot of money on something to

scare her; she thought he had splurged on a new computer. It turned out to be a diamond en-gagement ring. They got married in 1993.

Swope said she loves his sense of humor, but sometimes finds his horrendous spelling hard to over-come. She recalls the time he wrote her a note and called her a “sweatheart” rather than a “sweetheart.”

First date with mate

Started from Lupercalia, now it’s here

My heart!!

Submitted photo Science teacher Janet Koch spends time with her husband at a "Rock on the Dock” in 1983.

Submitted photo Koch kisses her husband on the cheek on vacation in California in 2015.

Submitted photo English teacher Amie Swope poses with her hus-band, Jeffrey, on their wedding day in 1993.

Submitted photo Secretary Rebecca Chapin and her husband Keith celebrate their 25th anniversary.

Submitted Photo Chapin and her husband smile for the camera on their wedding day.

Submitted photo The Chapins pose for a picture.

Page 2 — Trucker Imprint — Tuesday, February 14, 2017

1. Who said “I love you” first? 2. Who is more romantic? 3. Who usually replaces the toilet paper

roll? 4. Who chooses where you guys eat for din-

ner? 5. Who is the better cook? 6. Who is better at keeping secrets? 7. Who is more likely to be running late? 8. Who spends more money? 9. Who is a better dancer? 10. Who is more organized? 11. Who has more clothes? 12. Who has more shoes? 13. Who spends more time on social media? 14. Who makes dinner? 15. Who does the grocery shopping? 16. Who is more likely to get a traffic ticket? 17. Who does the laundry? 18. Who is the loudest? 19. Who loses things more often? 20. Who makes the coffee in the morning? 21. Who is better at sports? 22. Who watches T.V more? 23. Who is more likely to kill a spider? 24. Who mows the lawn? 25. Who is messier? 26. Who is the better driver? 27. Who buys the best gifts? 28. Who makes the bed? 29. Who wakes up first? 30. Who cleans the house? 31. Who is more festive? 32. Who is always reading? 33. Who is craftier? 34. Who is always tired? 35. Who is smarter? 36. Who is more competitive? 37. Who cries more at sad movies? 38. Who picks what movie to watch? 39. Who has a better sense of humor? 40. Who loves the other more?

Newlywed game – Baker style

1. Mr. 2. Mr. 3. Mrs. 4. Mrs. 5. Mr. 6. Mrs. 7. MR! 8. Mr. 9. Mr. 10. Mrs. 11. Mr. 12. Mr. 13. Mrs. 14. Mr. 15. Mrs. 16. Mr. 17. Mrs. 18. Mr. 19. Mr. 20. Mr. 21. Mrs. 22. Mr. 23. Mrs. :) 24. Mr. 25. Mr. 26. Mrs. 27. Mr. 28. Mrs. 29. Mrs. 30. Mrs. 31. Mr. 32. Mr. 33. Mrs. 34. Mr. 35. Mr. 36. Mrs. 37. Mrs. 38. Mrs. 39. Mr. 40. Mrs.

1. Who said “I love you” first? 2. Who is more romantic? 3. Who usually replaces the toilet paper

roll? 4. Who chooses where you guys eat for

dinner? 5. Who is the better cook? 6. Who is better at keeping secrets? 7. Who is more likely to be running late? 8. Who spends more money? 9. Who is a better dancer? 10. Who is more organized? 11. Who has more clothes? 12. Who has more shoes? 13. Who spends more time on social media? 14. Who makes dinner? 15. Who does the grocery shopping? 16. Who is more likely to get a traffic ticket? 17. Who does the laundry? 18. Who is the loudest? 19. Who loses things more often? 20. Who makes the coffee in the morning? 21. Who is better at sports? 22. Who watches T.V more? 23. Who is more likely to kill a spider? 24. Who mows the lawn? 25. Who is messier? 26. Who is the better driver? 27. Who buys the best gifts? 28. Who makes the bed? 29. Who wakes up first? 30. Who cleans the house? 31. Who is more festive? 32. Who is always reading? 33. Who is craftier? 34. Who is always tired? 35. Who is smarter? 36. Who is more competitive? 37. Who cries more at sad movies? 38. Who picks what movie to watch? 39. Who has a better sense of humor? 40. Who loves the other more?

1. Mr. 2. Mrs. 3. Mrs. 4. Mrs. 5. Mr. 6. Mr. 7. Mr. 8. Mrs. 9. Mrs. 10. Mrs. 11. Mr. 12. Mr. 13. Mr. 14. Mr. 15. Mrs. 16. Mr. 17. Mr. 18. Mr. 19. Mr. 20. Mr. 21. Mrs. 22. Mr. 23. Mrs. 24. Mr. 25. Mr. 26. Mr. 27. Mrs. 28. Mrs. 29. Mr. 30. Mr. 31. Mr. 32. Mr. 33. Mrs. 34. Mrs. 35. Mrs. 36. Mrs. 37. Mrs. 38. Mr. 39. Mr. 40. Mr.

Mrs. Mr.

Teachers Dustin and Callie Baker were asked to answer the following set of questions without knowing what their spouse’s answers were. The final count

showed that the Bakers answered 26 of the 40 questions with the same response.

Interviews by Alayna Warren and Emily Smith

“Love is when the other person’s

happiness is more important than

your own.” ~H. Jackson Brown Jr.

Dreadful dates or divine intervention? By Brandi Braker

Some dates are downright

cringe-worthy, read on for several accounts of terrible dates.

English teacher Leah Schus-ter’s worst date was when she was a freshman in college.

He asked her to go to his par-ents’ house for dinner and then go square dancing.

“And I don’t even like square dancing,” Schuster said, adding, “Also I hate spaghetti which is what I had to eat at his house.”

“Mostly it was a bad time but now we’re married and I make him go on cool dates. Not lame ones,” Schuster said.

Junior Sarah Nutter’s worst date happened on Valentine’s Day.

Nutter went out with her sis-ter’s boyfriend on Valentine’s Day because her sister was away at basic training and he was lone-ly.

“My sister told me to go,” Nutter said.

Nutter said they went to Casa

Fiesta and that she had to eat heart-shaped tortilla chips and tacos with him.

Junior Annie Hiler had two bad dates with the same person before their third date, which was the worst.

“I dragged Sarah [Nutter] along,” Hiler said.

They went to see a movie and Hiler shared a seat with Nutter while her date ended up sharing a seat with a 7th grade girl.

The girl kept offering chips to Hiler’s date throughout the whole movie, even though he kept turn-ing her down.

After the movie they went back to Hiler’s house and her date accidentally locked himself in her bathroom.

“He got all red and embar-rassed and left,” Hiler said.

Social studies teacher Nichole Blackwood had an awkward date before prom.

They went on a “fake date” her junior year of high school. When he asked her out she thought it was a group activity

and agreed. It ended up being just the two of them and when he asked if they could make it offi-cial, she said she broke his heart and told him they were “just friends.”

Her senior year she asked him to go to prom with her and alt-hough he didn’t want to, he went.

They went to Cold Stone Creamery before prom and Blackwood wanted to pay for their ice cream because she felt bad that he didn’t want to be there.

He wanted to be a gentleman and pay.

They got into an argument at the cash register about who was going to pay.

“It was really awkward and the cashier stood there while we argued,” Blackwood said.

To make matters more awk-ward, Blackwood said the power went out while they were eating the ice cream.

Ironically, the two are now engaged.

Senior Mya Ray’s worst date

was at Monroeville’s prom. he asked her date to go to the

movies before their prom date since they had never been on a date before and she wanted to get to know him better.

Ray met him at the movie the-ater and didn’t recognize him right away.

She said she asked him if he was hungry before they went in to see the movie and he said no but his stomach growled the whole time.

Ray said she felt really awk-ward at the beginning of the mov-ie because one of the first lines was, “I want my first time to be after prom.”

Ray said she got all red and after the movie he stood five feet away from her.

When they went to prom the car ride was dead silent and she ended up avoiding him the whole night. She talked to the other girls in their group instead.

After the dance they went to a fire and it was cold. He offered her his jacket but she said no.

Tuesday, February 14, 2017 — Trucker Imprint — Page 3

Are singles salty? By Brandi Braker

How do singles feel on the

most love-centric day of the year? Some singles shared their thoughts on Valentine’s Day.

“I have a love-hate relation-ship with the holiday,” senior Komal Mohan said. She has a similar view of couples.

Mohan said that the way she feels when she sees couples de-pends on the couple.

“If they’re cute I’m all for it but if they’re gross, get a room,” she said.

Mohan said she spends the day hanging out with her family watching movies, but sometimes she watches them alone.

If Mohan had a significant other to spend Valentine’s Day with, she said she would want to “rent a bunch of Disney movies and watch them and cook togeth-er or eat out.”

Junior Ethan Coover believes “you should share your affection every day, not just on one day.”

He said he doesn’t do any-thing different on Valentine’s Day — to him it’s just another day.

Coover shares Mohan’s mixed feelings about couples. He said

he feels “honestly, jealous but happy for them… as long as they aren’t overly [affectionate].”

Coover said that if he spent Valentine’s Day with someone he would “take her somewhere nice for dinner and a movie or some-thing.”

Junior Beth Stockmaster has clear feelings about Valentine’s Day.

“It sucks,” she said. Stockmaster said that some-

times seeing couples makes her want a relationship but she’s hap-py single too.

Currently, Stockmaster said she sits at home with her mom on Valentine’s Day but if she had a significant other, she would want to go out to dinner or do some-thing fun spending the day with him.

Photo by Brandi Braker Senior Komal Mohan would want to spend Val-entine’s Day watching Disney movies with her significant other. Beauty and the Beast would be her top choice.

Childhood crushes revealed

Sophomore Trevon Raymore (left) had a

childhood crush on sophomore Alyssa

Faley.

Photos by Emily Smith and Alayna Warren

Senior Max Berry (left) had a childhood crush on senior

Ellie Schneider.

Junior Matthew Sickinger (right) had a childhood crush

on junior Tori Smith.

Juniors Drake Neuberger and Maya Reineck

(above) had childhood crushes on each other.

Senior Komal Mohan (above) had a childhood crush on senior Griffin Rinner.

Gifts: some better than others By Rilee Horowitz

Exchanging gifts for Valen-tine's Day is a time-honored tradi-tion. Flowers or stuffed animals are usually the gift of choice, but sometimes there are especially good gifts, or bad ones, that break the mold.

A favorite gift of junior Shelbi Peterson was a pair of socks. They were blue and fuzzy and covered in hearts and bears in Valentine’s Day fashion.

Freshman Oscar Swanbeck recalls one of his favorite gifts. He received a tin heart full of chocolates, but what made the gift unique and heartfelt was the

drawing of Pepe the frog waiting for him at the bottom.

“I couldn’t stop laughing,” Swanbeck said.

Senior Alfredo Rangel can recall a gift he wasn’t very fond of. Rangel received a box of chocolates. The catch was that his significant other had eaten all of the milk chocolate, leaving him

with only dark chocolate left. Rangel said he does not like dark chocolate.

Junior Maya Reineck also re-members a gift she didn’t like, a plush version of Pepé le Pew. When she squeezed it, it would talk to her. Reineck said she hat-ed it.

Page 4 — Trucker Imprint — Tuesday, February 14, 2017

Name: Alayna Warren Nickname: Layn What dating website could you be found on? yoursearchisover.com What would your username be? @laynlikesbeardedmen What are your interests? I like sports, travel-ing, shopping and laughing. What are must-have qualities in your part-ner? Facial hair is an absolute must. Small guys freak me out, you better have bigger muscles than I do. Also, you have to be athletic -- wheth-er it be football or water polo, you have to enjoy sports. You better smell good. If the cologne is too expensive…..buy it anyways. I like clingy. What are some qualities that you don’t want in a partner? Don’t be annoying. Don’t laugh at my jokes if they really aren’t funny, just be hon-est with me and tell me to try again. Don’t leave me on read or open. Don’t be dumb; if you don’t know how to be independent and take on a chal-lenge then don’t waste your time. What is your ideal date? Not dressing up, or-dering pizza and wings, watching an OSU game and making each other laugh until our stomachs hurt. Oh, then a nap. Favorite pickup line: Kanye feel the love to-night? Describe yourself in one word: Quirky

Date us: We dare you

Name: Madeline Roche Nickname: Maddie or Madds the rads What dating website could you be found on? letmeloveyou.edu What would your username be? @Imayneverloveyoumorethanpizza What are your interests? Going on spontaneous adventures, reading, running, playing games, watching Net-flix, spending time with friends and family and EATING LOTS OF FOOD. What are must-have qualities in your partner? Taller than me, funny, sweet, trustworthy, cheesy, willing to carry me when I’m tired, good at putting up with my randomness, willing to bring me food and most important-ly, HE HAS TO KILL THE SPIDER. What are some qualities that you don’t want in a partner? If he’s obnoxious, doesn’t have good hygiene, leaves me on read a lot or ever seems annoyed by me, he can ctrl alt delete himself from my life. What is your ideal date?: Taking a pick-up truck to an awesome place to watch the stars and eat pizza, maybe even a beach. …Did I mention pizza? Favorite pickup line: Are you good at algebra? Replace my “x” without asking “y”. Describe yourself in one word: Cheesy

Name: Brandi Braker Nickname: umm… my mom calls me little peacock… What dating website could you be found on? awkwardbirdsmeet.gov What would your username be? @onedroopydroopfeather102103 What are your interests? performing, seeing shows, reading What are must-have qualities in your partner? You have to be ready for hardcore showtune duets at all times. Also, come to all of my shows or I’ll throw you into the orchestra pit. What are some qualities that you don’t want in a partner? If you up-stage me I’ll end you. DO NOT use the wrong form of homophones, just don’t. What is your ideal date? October 31st Favorite pickup line: Shall I compare thee to a summer’s day? You’re hot. Describe yourself in one word: Dramatic

Name: Rilee Horowtiz Nickname: Jesus What dating website could you be found on? Beardedboysbond.co.uk What would your username be? @beardiful_man51 What are your interests? Playing video games, saxophone, drawing, reading, writing, and of course caring for the beard. What are must-have qualities in your partner? Independence first and foremost. Please don’t cling. Otherwise someone who’s interested in stupid nerdy stuff, willing to debate and banter or just roast back and forth, and is honest about what they’re feeling. What are some qualities that you don’t want in a partner? Clinginess is maybe the only thing I can’t handle. I’m tolerant of almost anything else. Just be a cool/chill person and not a jerk and we can work. Also you’ve gotta be chill with facial hair. What is your ideal date? Literally anything, as long as we can spend some time together and it’s not boring. Favorite pickup line: Hey what’s your sine? It must be pi over two because you are the one. Describe yourself in one word: Nerd

Name: Emily Smith Nickname: Smemi What dating website could you be found on? ChurchGo-ersAndJesusLovers.org What would your username be? @Pay4MyTravelNeeds What are your interests? I enjoy traveling, and doing any-thing but being in high school. #Senioryearrocks What are must-have qualities in your partner? Must love Jesus. Must be taller than 5’3. Absolutely must have money for food and traveling. What are some qualities that you don’t want in a part-ner? Clingy. Don’t be clingy. But I also love attention, so figure out how women work before you decide to date me. I am moody, and loveable at the same time. What is your ideal date? I like my cat. We must pet her for at least one hour. She will sit in-between us on the couch and if she smells you and decides she likes you we can maybe have a second date. Favorite pickup line: “Are you a parking ticket, because you’ve got fine written all over you.” Describe yourself in one word: Short

Name: Logan Hurst Nickname: Logs or Logie What dating website could you be found on? AwkwardPotatoes-Mingle.net What would your username be? @BiggestBlameFoolInTheJungleOfNool28 What are your interests? Sleep-ing, binge watching Netflix for unhealthy amounts of time, belt-ing the lyrics to show tunes until my throat rips in half and coffee What are must-have qualities in your partner? Humility and a good sense of humor are musts. You should be open-minded and kind-hearted, but also MUST pos-sess the ability to roast my entire life. Overall, just do you and al-low me to do me and we’ll get along wonderfully. What are some qualities that you don’t want in a partner? Being immature will result in to-tal social media blockage. Don’t expect to do cheesy couple things with me, — I want you to be able to make fun of other couples with me. I basically dress like a bum eight out of seven days of the week, so don’t expect some magi-cal revelation just because you dress nicely. What is your ideal date? Noth-ing too involved, maybe a movie. As long as I don’t need to dress up I’ll be good. Favorite pickup line: Are you my appendix? Because I have no idea how you work, but you give me a feeling in my stomach that makes me want to take you out. Describe yourself in one word: Extra