When No Means NO.

We are all presented with business opportunities, volunteering requests, and dinner invitations. However at times these solicitations come with some possible risks in the ability to succeed effectively. Plus saying “yes” can have longer term side-effects on your stress than simply saying “no” to begin with.

How do you say “no” and still keep the doors open for future opportunities to work with a person, or a client and thereby staying on good terms?

Use the “Not Now” approach: Stephen Covey’s book on the “7 Habits of Highly Effective People” suggested something like this: “David, I’m so flattered you thought to ask me with so many good people out there to choose from. Unfortunately, I have several other commitments that prevent me from helping at this time. I hope you will keep me in mind in the future.”

Use the “Investment” approach: Greg McKeown dedicated an entire chapter in his book “Essentialism: The Disciplined Pursuit of Less”. Try this response “…I’ve invested quite a bit on a recent mega-project and therefore I have to see it through the completion. Given my other commitments I wouldn’t be able to do a job that I would be proud of.”

Use the “Flattery” approach: “Dinner out with you sounds great! Unfortunately I planned time at home to catch up on a few items I’ve neglected due to other commitments. When is a good time to reschedule?”

When someone sees you as committed to a bigger direction they will respect you and your time. No doubt saying “no” often requires trading popularity for your personal, financial, and career goals.

How do you say “NO” and still maintain respect?