‘Love Knows no Boundaries in Serowe’

Friday 16 September 2011 will forever linger in the mind of the 39 years old Mpho Boitshwarelo of Sekga ward in Serowe because that is the day she got wedded to my mother’s 87 years old uncle; Mabetha Bright Nthobatsang. Mapoka ward in Serowe was abuzz with the news of the impending marriage weeks before it happened since it is not common for someone as old as my mum’s uncle to get married, let alone to someone as young as 39. But in the end he proved all the sceptics wrong when he walked down the aisle with his young sweetheart at a well attended wedding ceremony on Saturday 17th September 2011.

We have had so many weddings but as far as I can remember I have never seen so much excitement among my family members before a marriage ceremony. By family members i am talking about Uncle Bright’s close relatives such as cousins and aunts. Everyone seemed to be so ecstatic as preparations for the big wedding neared completion. In fact, my cousin, Pine Dikgobo Habangana, who is named after my grandfather who was born in 1914, brother to uncle Bright, said that Uncle Bright was his role model.

I must say, though, that there was some drama as the events leading to the wedding unfolded. My uncle’s five children apparently did not give their blessings to their father’s decision to marry a younger woman. Furthermore, they also influenced their own children to boycott their grandfather’s wedding and their absence on the day could be noticed by even a blind

person. In order to frustrate their father even further it is alleged that they advised him strongly that the wedding celebration should not be held at his compound. The rejections by his own children did not deter him because all his relatives supported him till the last day. His late brother’s children came to the rescue and offered to host the event.

Friday 16th began with the usual formalities at the District Commissioners office where the DC performed the official duty of joining couples legally. Altogether there were four couples getting married on the day. I am quite certain that the other couples who were all old enough to be my uncle’s grandchildren will never forget the day they got married because among them was probably the oldest person in the history of Botswana to ever get married at the age of eighty seven. I have always believed that in order to say that you saw people getting married you need to be there when they exchange vows. Being at the DC’s office witnessing my uncle exchanging vows was to me a moment of truth and I had so many mixed emotions. It was so beautiful and emotional to see the two people who have fallen in love with each other irregardless of the age gap and rejections’ committing themselves to one another for life. I was not even born the first time he got married and his second marriage was an ah-hah moment for me.

The climax was Saturday when we celebrated the wedding. We started the day quite early as usual to prepare food and where we were going to welcome visitors. If the bride and the groom are both from Serowe like it was the case with my uncle and his bride then the wedding is celebrated on the same day. Usually a lot of preparations are done at the brides place as is the norm and the wedding party moves to the grooms place late afternoon when the brides family comes to hand over her at the man’s place.

I had to assist the bride with make-up and dressing her in the morning. Love was in the air that day and I’ve never seen so many people eager to catch a glimpse of the couple. Curious faces peered into the tinted windows of the huge Nissan Sedan that transported the couple. The first stop by the wedding party was Serowe Hotel where the couple went for a photo shoot. The staff at Serowe Hotel looked at the couple with surprise written all over their faces. It was interesting to note on Saturday that the bride was more relaxed and smiled more often unlike the previous day when they were at the DC’s office. I had never seen so many photographers at a wedding photo shoot like there was at this particular wedding. Even at my own wedding there was only one photographer. From Serowe Hotel the party proceeded to my mum’s cousin’s place, Sophisto Nthobatsang, for another photo shoot. Sophisto’s garden is one of those which evokes in the mind pictures of The Garden of Eden which we read about in the bible.

After the photo shoot the party proceeded to the bride’s place. Introductions were made by designated people. The groom was the first one to speak, true to the Setswana saying that “ga di etelelwe ke manamagadi pele”. The bride followed later.

Mpho could not hide her excitement throughout the celebrations. When asked why she agreed to be married by an old man she said she was tired of young men who are only good at making someone have children only to dump you later. She said she wanted someone that she could call her own man. When uncle Bright proposed to her before they started dating he told

her from the beginning that his wife passed away and that he would like to marry her. The ecstatic Mpho said she was so excited because no one had ever said they wanted to marry her and she believed at that point that my uncle was the man chosen for her by God. According to her, my uncle did not only love her but he also cared and loved her four children. She promised to respect, love and take care of my Uncle for the rest of their lives.

On the other hand Uncle Bright lost his wife about ten years ago leaving him with a disabled son who became blind at the age of five because of an outbreak of measles in the late 70s. When he met Mpho and started dating her, he said she assumed the responsibilities of a woman quite well and she filled the gap that was left by his late wife.

The day’s events came to an end when the wedding party finally proceeded to the groom’s place. There was pandemonium when they arrived and i have a wound to show as evidence. Everyone wanted to be close to the couple and some people expressed what could be termed shock because they thought all along that it was not true that Uncle Bright was going to marry a younger woman. The groom’s side stole the limelight and the party was met with song and dance amid ululations. The master of ceremonies was amazing and added zest to the occasion. Poetry was recited reminding us of the long traditions of the Nthobatsang family.

I believe my uncle’s wedding was the wedding of the year. What a way to end the year. I will always remember the day my uncle proved to the world that “age ain’t nothing but a number”, and that “love knows no boundaries”.