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SA at war PAGE 7Twitter wars PAGE 5 Free speech? PAGES 8 & 9 Town by day PAGE 10 UCT Squash PAGE 15

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16 April 2013 VOLUME 72: EDITION 5 varsitynewspaper.co.za @varsitynews varsitynewspaper

VarsityTHE OFFICIAL STUDENT NEWSPAPER OF THE UNIVERSITY OF CAPE TOWN

Jessica Breakey & Krysia Gaweda

There has been much debate around UCT Management’s

proposed Friday and Saturday examinations and Saturday tests. Independent students, religious students and Students’ Representative Council (SRC) members alike have voiced their concerns.

Keenan Hendrickse, SRC Vice President External, expressed his disapproval of the proposed changes. “From an issue of principle, both the proposal for Friday and Saturday tests and exams is an insult to the University's stated goals of transformation,” he stated.

With regard to Friday and Saturday exams, Hendrickse expressed how “the main problem is not an issue of not having enough exam days, but rather an issue of exams not being coordinated properly”.

In an aim to gather students’ opinions on the proposal, the SRC hosted a Mass Meeting on Tuesday, April 9th. The meeting brought to light an array of mixed emotion.

Key issues mentioned included the effects the proposal will have on religious students, issues of public transport, when and where deferred exams would be written as well as finances.

Thomas Guattari-Stafford, SRC Day Students Co-ordinator, said that there were both pros and cons for the proposal.

“As we are all aware, travelling on public transport in the evening is a risk to students' safety,” Guattari-Stafford said. “By allowing Saturday tests, the university may be able to discontinue tests being written in the evening, thus increasing the safety of the students.”

There are approximately 18 000 day students at UCT, the majority of which rely on public transport

Saturday exams and tests a no-no

to commute to UCT. Guattari-Stafford stated, however, that there are other concerns with regard to developmental agencies, societies and sports clubs.

“These are sectors which also affect day students, as many day students feel attached to the university through these activities,” Guattari-Stafford explained.

On April 11th, Student Assembly held a Special Meeting where the SRC further discussed the Friday and Saturday exam and Saturday

test proposal. The original motion brought

forward by RAG Chairperson, Daniel Sive, suggested that students should have no Saturday exams, but instead two exam sessions on a Friday.

These exam sessions should be structured to not interfere with any religious practices.

There were amendments from the floor that the morning session should end before noon to accommodate the religious commitments of UCT’s

Muslim community. The second afternoon session should then run from 3pm to 5pm to not interfere with the religious practices of Jewish students.

The house then further agreed that the Friday afternoon slot would only be occupied by exam sessions that are two hours.

There was no objection to these amendments raised in the assembly. The Student Assembly adopted this amended examination proposal as an official recommendation to the SRC.

However, it was mathematically impossible for the Student Assembly to have a binding decision on the SRC. Only 62% of the house was present and an absolute majority of 66% is needed to make a binding decision.

Students at the sitting expressed concern that the decision would not be considered mandatory. The SRC assured students that this amendment concerning examinations would be the stance that they will take to UCT’s Senate.

The next proposal brought forward to the floor was Saturday tests.

Hendrickse stated that Saturday tests were already in place in certain faculties. However, he said it was an “unsanctioned move” and that the “serious issue has been neglected for many years”.

In receiving this news, the house unanimously rejected Saturday tests.

SHAWCO Chairperson, Stephen Bourhill, confirmed how Saturday tests would affect societies that used Saturdays for projects and events such as Step programs and Smart programs.

The SRC accepted the stance of the house, but has asked students for submissions so they are able to formulate an argument and give concrete reasons to the Senate.

Lorne Hallendorff, SRC President, reassured the house that although the SRC is not bound by the house’s decision, the SRC would adopt its stance.

All of the 11 SRC members present at the assembly supported the motion brought forward by the house. Hallendorff confirmed that this would be the SRC’s stance at the senate meeting.

The SRC President continued to reassure the house that they should not be worried that the members present would change their minds.

Students have until the end of April 16th to send in submissions and give reason to the SRC regarding the proposal.

The UCT Senate is set to convene on April 19th to vote on the proposal to schedule examination sessions on Fridays and Saturdays as well as Saturday tests.

the house unanimously rejected

Saturday tests

Image: httpcapetowncapades.blogspot.com front page

2 V72 E5 – 16 APRIL 2013 newsNEWS BITES

Baroness Margaret Thatcher dies

LONDON – Margaret Thatcher, 87, dies following a stroke in the Ritz Hotel, London. She was the first and only woman to have held the position of Prime Minister in the UK. Her funeral will take place at London St Paul’s Cathedral.

- BBC news

South Korea raises alert

SEOUL – South Korea has raised its alert level to “vital threat” after North Korea moved two Musudan missiles to its east coast, indicating preparation for a missile test. Such a test launch would be a violation of a UN Security Council Resolution.

- BBC news

Withdrawal of SA troops from CAR

JOHANNESBURG – The ANC has welcomed the government’s decision to withdraw troops from Central African Republic (CAR) where 13 South African soldiers were killed and 27 wounded on March 23rd when they were attacked near Bangul, CAR’s capital. The DA has also welcomed the decision.

- News24

Bird flu found on ostrich farm

CAPE TOWN – Test samples from an ostrich farm near Oudtshoorn found the presence of the H7N1 virus. Previous incidents of the virus however, were not related to the current Chinese strain thus authorities believe that it is unlikely to pose a threat to humans.

- REUTERS

Django Unchained altered for Chinese audience

CHINA – Quentin Tarantino’s movie Django Unchained, is his first film to receive theatrical release in China however, he had to slightly adjust the bloody violence to appease Chinese sensibilities. The director views these adjustments as progress rather than as a compromise.

-THE HUFFINGTON POST

Man floats from Robben Island to Cape Town

CAPE TOWN – Matt Silver-Vallance, 36, raised R90 000 for the future Nelson Mandela Children’s Hospital by floating from Robben Island to the mainland. He used 160 colourful helium balloons to float for an hour to travel roughly 11km from the island to the mainland.

- ABC NEWS

Sophie Robertson

Stefanie Busch

The recent scandal concerning the deployment of South African National Defence Force (SANDF) soldiers to the Central African Republic (CAR) has sparked criticisms regarding the constitutionality of and the reason for this deployment.

After 13 SANDF soldiers were killed on March 22nd following an attack by rebel fighters from the Seleka alliance in the CAR’s capital Bangui, President Jacob Zuma ordered the withdrawal of South African troops.

Zuma has gone on to praise the fallen soldiers for their service to South Africa. At the memorial service Zuma stated, “We will be able to boldly say how special they were, to put their own lives at risk for such a noble mission of building peace in the continent.”

Alongside such condolences, Zuma also went on to warn those who had made allegations that ulterior motives existed behind the deployment of troops to the CAR, stating that those accusations sought to “dishonour the memory of our heroes by peddling various unfounded allegations and conspiracy theories”.

Furthermore, Zuma warned critics that their allegations were endangering the national interest, as well as the security of the state.

Critics accused Zuma of failing to adequately inform

Central African Republic: Ulterior motives?

Parliament about the reasons for the deployment of the troops to the CAR in the first place.

This is required from Zuma by the Constitution and Defence Act of 2002, which specifically states that the President is to inform Parliament in “appropriate detail” about the reason for the deployment.

In January, the Presidency had argued that the troops were deployed to assist with training and capacity building of the CAR Defence Forces. The interstate assistance is believed to form part of a bilateral agreement signed in 2007 between former President Thabo Mbeki

UC T AIRvent a success

Visser’s statement that donating to UCT was necessary to ensure that UCT remained amongst the top universities.

Hallendorff corroborated this view, stating that UCT graduates left with critically-educated minds and thus have the responsibility to use it for the better. He also said that current students and graduates had a responsibility to the UCT community to ensure that the high levels of interaction and education were continued.

“There are…ways of giving back to UCT other than money. We

have a lot to be proud of UCT for,” Hallendorff concluded.

Matoponyane explained that UCT AIR had been founded in 2009, and the increasing success of the events hosted by AIR shows that more students understand their “mandates” as ambassadors of UCT.

“We want to create a UCT identity through roles and responsibilities as individual students,” said Matoponyane.

Hendricks said that while UCT graduates received no preferential treatment at their workplace, the exposure and opportunities she

received at UCT greatly advantaged her in choosing the correct job.

“It’s about whether you use your opportunities or not. I think we need to create a cycle of giving back,” she said.

Hlumelo Biko, son of black consciousness leader Steve Biko, and former UCT Chancellor Mamphele Ramphele, shared his ten-point “cheat sheet” to taking opportunities in life. This gave current students an idea of the kind of determination and drive it takes to succeed before entering the “real world”.

Introducing distinguished guest speakers to current students also allows UCT AIR to contribute to the student body by creating life chances and opportunities for students.

Students educated at UCT fall into two categories; convocational students must have completed a degree at UCT, while non-convocational students are individuals that have completed one semester or are current students. This includes students that have spent a semester abroad.

“We want to be as inclusive as possible,” Matoponyane concluded.

Cai Nebe

UCT’s Alumni in Residence (AIR) organisation held a

well-attended networking cocktail evening on Friday, April 5th at Obz Square Hall. It was the organisation’s first event of the year.

UCT AIR is a student-run organisation that provides a platform for current students to interact and network with UCT graduates and other alumni.

“You must have completed at least one semester of study at UCT to qualify as an alumni,” explained chairperson, Thabang Matoponyane.

Every seat in the hall was occupied as students were addressed by Deputy Vice-Chancellor Danie Visser, SRC president Lorne Hallendorff, a UCT Graduate of 2012, Rifquah Hendricks, and UCT graduate and businessman, Hlumelo Biko.

Students quickly consumed an impressive selection of finger foods after the speeches in an informal meet-and-greet platform. Points of discussion included

and former CAR President Francois Bozize.

However, contradictory statements made in Parliament as to the reasons for the deployment have caused many to question the underlying reasons behind the SANDF deployment.

At the Students for Social Justice (SLSJ) event “Ulterior Motives? SA’s role in the CAR”, Lionell Faul, member of amaBhungane (Mail & Guardian Centre for Investigative Journalism), stated that the true reason behind the deployment of SANDF troops was far beyond the “peace-keeping mission that we have been told about”.

Commenting on the worrying

ANC-linked business interests in CAR, Faul questioned the economic motivations that might be lurking behind the deployment of troops, such as the centralisation of the control of the diamond industry in CAR.

Faul went on to speculate that the troops were deployed to maintain the political regime in CAR, being in the interest of many politically connected business moguls in South Africa.

Democratic Alliance leader Helen Zille has also stated that the reason for the deployment was to “protect the business interests of a politically connected elite, both in South Africa and the CAR”.

ulterior motives existed behind the

deployment of troops to the CAR

Image: www.facebook.com/uctairUCT AIR: The cocktail networking event was a great success.

Image: www.flickr.com

3V72 E5 - 16 APRIL 2013news

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MEDICAL AID ACCEPTED

Chris van der Westhuyzen

Members of the SRC have announced their plans to

establish an International Students Coordinator portfolio within the SRC.

The announcement came on Wednesday April 10th during the second International Students Forum, a quarterly event that gives all non-local students the opportunity to raise concerns about or comment on their experience at UCT.

Darren Brookbanks, SRC Sports and Recreation Coordinator, who deals with the concerns of Semester Study Abroad (SSA) students, said the portfolio would ensure that the SRC could properly represent the interests of all international students.

“I coordinate the sports portfolio, and I can tell you now there are more international students here than there are students who are active in sports,” Brookbanks said.

Chanda Chungu, SRC Societies Coordinator, who is also in charge of assisting International Full Degree (IFD) students, said the proposal for an International Students Coordinator portfolio was yet to be fully evaluated by the SRC and Student Assembly.

“We brought it up at the forum so we can hear student views,” Chungu said. “We are still gathering information from various stakeholders.”

During the International Student

SRC propose International Student portfolio

Forum, at which the proposal for the new portfolio was announced, students engaged with Chungu and Brookbanks, as well as Professor Crain Soudien, Deputy Vice-Chancellor for Transformation, on the difficulties they faced as non-local students at UCT.

Stephanie Adongo, a Property

Studies student, said the case studies in her course dealt exclusively with South African examples, which made it difficult for international students to relate to the case.

“It will be great if the curriculum could include examples that are relevant to all students, including those who are not from South

Africa,” Adongo said. Prof Soudien said despite

UCT being a hotspot among international students, the “puzzle of internationalisation” came with several challenges.

“We fail to engage with what these students have to offer,” Soudien said. “We assimilate them into the

New liquor laws bad for businessHangula Lukas

A new bylaw regulating the purchasing and consumption of alcohol came into effect on April 1st. The new regulations, passed by the City of Cape Town municipality, require all liquor stores to close at 6pm and make it illegal for certain pubs and clubs to serve alcohol after 2am.

Furthermore, it is now illegal to purchase or be in possession of more than 150 litres of alcohol (around 20 cases of beer) without a liquor license or permission from the Presiding Officer on the Liquor Board. Offenders could face up to R100 000 in fines or a 6-month jail sentence.

The new regulations came as quite an upset to moderate drinkers who feel they are being punished in an attempt to resolve the larger issue of hard-core alcoholism. The law could see a change to the way Capetonians celebrate big events like weddings and parties.

dominant culture, but we don’t learn from them.”

Another concern raised at the forum pertained to the exclusion of international students from financial aid opportunities, as well as the fact that spaces in UCT’s Medical School were reserved for local students only.

Prof Soudien said UCT was obligated to serve predominantly local students, as the South African government funded 60% of the

university’s budget.“We are funded by the local

taxpayer, so we have to serve that constituency first and foremost,” Soudien said. “We will never be able to escape that situation. So we have to make pragmatic choices.”

Soudien emphasised that international students should not feel their studies at UCT were “on sufferance”. He said learners from abroad would always have access to UCT as they formed an invaluable part of the student experience on campus.

“It is important to remember that UCT doesn’t belong to anybody. We have to think like that. Otherwise, if we are just a channel for local knowledge, we will end up merely reproducing the smallness of our own environments,” said Soudien.

According to South Africa's constitution, laws regulating the liquor industry fall under the jurisdiction of the various local municipalities across the country. As a result, the new laws have brought about several legal contradictions between different regions.

Some people feel the new regulations are unworkable and unrealistic, while others see it as a solution to widespread social ills like drunk driving and indecent public behaviour.

A Public Policy and Administration student said the new regulations were unlikely to change the dangerous patterns of alcohol abuse among some South Africans.

“The problem runs far deeper than we think," she said. "It starts at the home and is psychological. If my father is an alcoholic, chances are that I may become one too. Closing the sheeben doors is not going to solve that.”

Lloyd Cummings, an electrical engineering student, said there were pros and cons related to the

new laws. “I think it’s a good thing, I mean

the less alcohol out there the better…it will cut down on irresponsible behaviour, but it might be bad for the businesses.”

Quinton Du Plessis, a supervisor at a Pick ‘n Pay liquor store, said that the new law would affect sales quite significantly.

“Our business only starts to pick up at about six, and that’s when the curfew kicks in forcing us to close,” Du Plessis said. “This will also not stop alcohol enthusiasts as they would just purchase their alcohol at an earlier time.”

Sunup Itsou, a second-year finance student, said the new laws would affect his lifestyle, adding that there were other ways of deterring alcohol use.

“It’s not going to work, how will I be able watch my soccer matches not being able to drink alcohol along with it," Itsou said. "They should rather focus on the policing and maybe even increase the tax on it."

“We fail to engage with what these students

have to offer”

Image: Jessica Breakey

Image: Elelwani Netshifhire

ENGAGING: Professor Crain Soudien and Darren Brookbanks discussing the proposal with students.

4 V72 E5 - 16 APRIL 2013 editorial

Alexandra NagelEditor-in-Chief

A/pathetic story

Andrew Montandon Managing Editor

editor-in-chief Alexandra Nagel deputy Editor Rebecca Dallas managing Editor Andrew Montandon Copy Editor Laurie Scarborough online editor Mitch Prinsloo

Online chief subber Theresa Scott news Krysia Gaweda & Chris van der Westhuyzen opinions Katy Scott & Uthman Quick features Daniël Geldenhuys & Lynne Marie Fraser sportS Rob

Byrne & Megan Kinnaird centrespread Zarmeen Ghoor images Tebesethu Nkambule, Elelwani Netshifhire, Siyanda Ralane & Jessica Breakey Design Julien Speyer web Stephen Hulme, Robin

Mukanganise & Peter Maluge advertising & Finance Imaad Isaacs & Salman Ghoor Operations Mwinji Siame marketing Vikash Gajjar human resources Tanyaradzwa Dzumbunu

& Kudzai Tabaziba STAFF WRITERS Ryan Bird, Ryno Nortje, Busang Senne, Cai Nebe, Stefanie Busch, Hannah Gauss,

Sandile Tsahabalasub-editors Beverly Ochieng’, Jena Ascough, Diana Fletcher & Katelyn Mostert20

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Mitch PrinslooOnline Editor

TELEPHONE: 021-650 3543 Level 5, Steve Biko Students’ Union

@varsitynewspaper.co.za

Rebecca Dallas Deputy Editor

The mob waits for me as I trudge up the wooden stairs onto the

platform of newspapers which I indeed made for myself and must hence take responsibility for my printed word, even if it is not that of my own. Because it is easier to walk with torches blazing while clutching on to Blackberries with the Twitter app wide open than to support the racist xxxxxxxxxxx to shackle those that do.

As I lay my head on the chopping block for the executioner’s cold, black blade with the word “censored” in big, fat bold letters engraved on it, I look up at the shining banners and TV screens and see my face on the E-News channel with the name “Victoria Nagel” underneath it.

Suddenly, the block fell away and I gathered my platform of newspapers and laughed heartily at such hypocrisy: you disregard our student newspaper and its credibility yet you can’t even get the Editor’s name right as a national broadcaster.

A pathetic apathetic story, it is. It doesn’t matter if you choose the former or the latter title, but before you pass judgement, be responsible enough to read the whole thing before you do so.

Race is xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx which would make you racist because xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx. That makes sense, doesn’t it? Read only what you choose and you will interpret only what you wish to interpret. Go in with that mind-set and you will get the same outcome regardless of what you are actually reading.

Yes, I am aware of South Africa’s race xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx as I am

Laurie ScarboroughCopy Editor

NewsgatheringLeslie Social 1A

Tuesday April 16th, 1pm

kick in the stomach. Just then the boss arrived and commanded the bouncers to take him to the back to “answer more questions” using the good old interrogation-torture technique. His face was already battered and bleeding, but no-one flinched.

I was so appalled. Surely catching the guy and giving him a slap or two was enough? Why do we have so little faith in our legal system that we feel the need to take the law into our own hands? Or are we really so savage that we don’t think twice about breaking someone. It got me thinking about what people believe constitutes equal punishment. But that, my friends, is surely not it…

The one that got awayIt seemed transparently obvious to me, that while yes, the public transport system runs so predictably perfectly that it’s almost boring, Australia too is riddled with social problems, just like us...

Columns continued online

Letter to the editor:Dear Editor

The centre spread feature on tuition fees that was published in Varsity (“What’s in a degree?” on March 12th) refers. While it is true that studying at the University of Cape Town generally costs more than at other universities, UCT is constantly seeking new ways to increase the value of higher education in terms of the quality of teaching, facilities, research and services to students.

There are three additional factors that are worth noting in a comparison of tuition fees:

UCT fees are all-inclusive. They

cover costs that are often added onto tuition fees at other SA universities, such as lecture notes, computer access, field trips, instruments, lab charges, to name a few.

UCT offers a range of financial assistance packages. The university makes more than R441m available to eligible UCT students for financial assistance. This includes R100m out of UCT’s own coffers. This policy guarantees the necessary financial support to any student which is accepted on academic grounds and eligible for assistance. In other words, no student will be turned away from UCT simply on the basis

of financial need.UCT’s pass rate is significantly

higher than that of other South African universities. This is in part because of the investment UCT makes towards academic development and other programmes to help students succeed in their selected programme of study. UCT’s brand and reputation gain in prestige as a result – and so does the prestige of UCT alumni.

With kind regards,Patricia Lucas

Manager: Communications & Media LiaisonCommunication and Marketing DepartmentUniversity of Cape Town

Last Friday I spent part of my night in a dark little bar with a couple of friends. The bar closed at 1.55am; dutifully enforcing the new by-

laws, much to the dismay of our fellow, merry customers. The music continued playing long after last round was called, and we stayed long enough to see the inebriated passers-by come floating through the doors, only to be disappointed that no more alcohol was being served. We stayed to watch the events of the night unfold.

As we were leaving, at about 3am, the bouncers noticed two men breaking in to the one of the flats directly above the bar. Running after them, they managed to catch one of the skollies and consequently gave him a solid beating up. I overheard someone saying that every loyal, regular customer that was still milling around gave him a merciless

Pimpel en pers ...

Come out and see a good filmThis weekend I managed to view the local attractions of this year’s South African gay & lesbian film festival – Out In Africa. Despite the event being run since 1994, this was...

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of a race that xxxxxxxxxxx. The fact that it caused such a riot just goes to show that it is still an insecurity that needs to be addressed, not only in our country, but everywhere in the world. We are all part of categories; trust me, race xxxxxxxxxxxxxx that is socially constructed. So let us not pretend that race xxxxxxxxxxxxx because it is not. It is there, clear as day whether you choose to acknowledge it or not. It was a reality constructed for us by us (us being mankind) and yes for the bad and not the good. Hell, even admittance into this very institution is based on categorisation. We’ve all had to tick the box stating which race xxxxxxxx. So by UCT asking you, there in black and white ink, to classify yourself into the very social construction of Apartheid that we wish we could put behind us, are not all 24 000 students just buying in to this so-called rascism, because xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx,, am I right?

Do not take this as fact, lovely people, as it is a column and in this format for a reason. A space for an OPINION, meaning someone’s belief on certain matters that are “less than absolutely certain”. Come to wonderful media lectures that UCT has to offer and perhaps one could learn a thing or two about an opinions piece.

Call me a white racist xxxxxxxxxxx and spread rumours like high schoolers, but then have the dignity to contribute in making the world a better place instead of lashing out on those who are already trying. And you are not supposed to agree with or anyone else. In fact, that is the beauty of individuality and having the right to an opinion.

A pathetic story I say, but an apathetic one too. Our poor constitution being tangled up in this mess deserves an apathetic eye. To remember, though, that it did not fall from the heavens above, the rules xxxxxxxxxxx group of opinions on what we can and can’t do or say.

Annoying isn’t it when you can’t see article for what it’s worth, with all its racist xxxxxx splattered across the page.

5V72 E5 – 16 APRIL 2013opinions

DisclaimerThe VARSITY Opinions section is a vehicle for expression on any topic by members of the university community

or other interested parties. The opinions within this section are not necessarily those of the VARSITY

Collective or its advertisers.

Letters to the Editor need to be kept to a maximumof 300 words and can be sent to:

opinions@varsitynewspaper.co.za

wScotty Does Know Katy ScottOpinions Editor

Wining, dining, but mostly whining.

Remembering Mandela

Anant Dole & Katy Scott

In a rosier time, the name Nelson Mandela would have made our heads swirl with patriotic, mystical images of an anti-Apartheid activist, Robben Island, Mr. President and Father of our Nation. Now all we are left pondering is whether – due to his constant health issues – he is still alive or not.

The other day I was distressed to overhear a jock on the Jammie

Twitter bullying: haters and traitorsLaurie Scarborough

You have 140 characters. What do you do with them?

Being new to the Twitter-sphere, I didn’t have many answers to that question, until about two weeks ago. I’m more accustomed to having pages worth of space to lay down my thoughts, so when confronted with a block the size of a name tag in which to succinctly say something witty, insightful, useful or thoughtful, nothing much springs to mind. And judging by the hundreds of Tweets I read over the last fortnight, I am not alone.

To clarify, when I say “not alone”, I don’t mean that, like me, everyone struggles to Tweet at all. No, it is the insightful, useful, thoughtful and (allow me to add one more) truthful part of Tweeting that people struggle with. Speaking from recent experience, the truth is something that many people take for granted, are too lazy to pursue or down-right do not care about. And it seems that when Twitter bullying is involved,

“What can I get you to drink?” a blond fringe

asks as disinterested eyes roll and a brogued foot taps impatiently. I smile at my friend and reply, “Hmm, I’m not quite sure. Which blends of coffee do you guys serve, where are the beans imported from, and what degree of roast is it?” I’m met with a sigh and a, “I’ll go find out for you.”

Now I do not know the first thing about coffee, nor do I care for that matter, so despite what you may think, this was by no means an attempt to impress my c o m p a n i o n , (who at this point was hiding behind the rustic wine bottle-come-flower vase).

Our waiter returns with a tight-lipped smile and parrots the response his manager has just told him. “Oh that sounds wonderful” I reply. “We’ll have two waters please.”

Maybe I’m a tad malicious in that I get a kick out of making my wait staff actually put a little effort into waiting on me. But hell, if I’m paying R50 for a homemade, gourmet scone on a plate littered with pointless garnish, I expect my waitron to serve it with a back flip and a bow, thank you very much.

Having been a waitress myself, and having respectively been fired from said profession, I do take my hat off to these kids. It aint easy being bossed and pushed around, nor is it pleasant having to please

everyone for hours on end. For the minds that wandered

away for a second there, yes, at times it does feel like you are selling your soul along with every overpriced meal, so much so that at my former place of work, the wait staff were strategically assigned to clients of the opposite sex.

It is safe to surmise, that after a few neglected customers, pizzas I served into laps, and a certain R50 that was slipped into my apron, I swiftly took my leave.

I must say that that series of traumatic shifts has given me the utmost respect for that dime in a dozen, cheery, efficient waitron.

Yet if you take a closer look at the restaurants and coffee joints that are trending in Cape Town, it becomes clear that top-notch service is in fact unsuited to the laidback feel these “hang out” places exude.

If you’re enjoying your meal at some random location, in what appears to resemble an actual kitchen or lounge, it’s no wonder the clientele and

staff are one and the same. This generalization may be

of the sweeping variety, but in my opinion, it seems that the restaurant business has found a way to capitalize on being as lazy as possible. They have hooked onto the strange phenomenon that characterizes “hip” society: less is more.

People these days will dish out orange Randela’s for anything hashtagged ‘organic’ or ‘gourmet’. I’m sorry, but unless you are a cordon bleu chef or Daisy the cow is supplying milk from your backyard, I will not be fed to believe such nonsense.

Instead I prop my combat boots up on the table, rock back on my chair and wave my hand about for someone to take my order. The funny thing? Nobody even blinks.

this is no exception. Back when I was at school, bullying

was done either behind your back or face-to-face. But the technological age has given bullying a step up to the Tweets – interface-to-interface. Twitter is now being used as a platform for bullying; bullying that is acutely public, and almost inescapable.

You could be on holiday in Fiji and any idiot with their phone could still write 140 characters of defamation, hash-tagging you for good measure. It’s so much easier to type up a pithy phrase than to say what you think to someone’s face, and even the laziest of people can find the energy to click “retweet”.

And just like that, with the simple click of a button, the world can see your dirty laundry. Knowing first-hand what inflammatory comments can do to an otherwise clean reputation, Twitter hate and cyber bullying is no joke and should not be treated lightly.

But what happens when Twitter bullying turns to Twitter threats? It’s sometimes hard to know if Twitter threats are real or idle but either way, being threatened or gossiped about

in a public sphere is distressing and serious. Publishing threatening or slanderous comments on Twitter is the same as gossiping behind someone’s back, except that now there is permanent written proof of it. And once something is published on the internet, it’s hard to get rid of – which could be useful.

Unluckily for people who tweet damaging rumours and threats on Twitter, police have begun clamping down on these kinds of comments. Back in 2010, after a flight was cancelled in a UK airport, Paul Chambers tweeted in jest that he would be “blowing the airport sky high”. He was charged and found guilty for publishing a “grossly offensive” message on the internet. Now that’s no laughing matter.

So be careful. Hiding behind social media platforms to spread rumours or make threats can lead to some serious legal repercussions. If ever in doubt, heed the advice my mother taught me long before Twitter was invented: If you have nothing nice to say, say nothing at all.

saying that he hoped Madiba would ‘croak’ in the second half of the year as we need some public holidays to break up that period. Now it is true that Madiba has not been a major political factor since his retirement, yet I couldn’t help but wonder if in death his legacy will extend to anything more than “that conveniently timed public holiday”.

On April 2nd an obituary insert entitled Remembering Mandela was incorrectly broadcasted by Universal Channel on DSTV. Although Universal Channel has

since apologised for the mistake, it almost seemed to reinforce said Jammie jock’s inference that our beloved Madiba may already be just a memory.

It is highly unlikely that his eventual death will be met with inconsolable masses. Nor will it spur off repressed black anger as the urban legends have suggested. He will pass, and a world will mourn, finding time amidst the grief to pay homage to his morals, values and accomplishments.

Media across the world will be saturated with footage from his life and live broadcasts of his funeral for the weeks that follow. Shops will sell Mandela memorabilia and a book or two will be written. As time goes by the mourners will dry their tears, the hype will subside and things will go back to how they used to be. The pride of our nation, the empathy and the brotherhood we held for those brief moments will disintegrate as quickly as it came to be.

Corruption, poverty and nepotism will prosper once again, and the principles Mandela instilled will remain mere memories more distant than the man himself.

This is not to say that his death will go unnoticed, if anything it will force a nation into remembering his invaluable contribution to the very creation of it. It is however rather sad to think that it will take a tragedy to bring about such a realisation.

In taking a closer look at our unique situation, our rich heritage and the freedom we use and abuse on a daily basis, it becomes evident that Madiba’s legacy is in fact all around us, whether or not we choose to acknowledge it.

our beloved Madiba may already be just a memory

it does feel like you are selling your soul with

every overpriced meal

Image: www.flickr.com/viewafrica

6 V72 E5 – 16 APRIL 2013 opinions

Sanvir Singh

I have been at UCT for a little over two months now and cannot get over the sheer amount of beauty this place has to offer. Going to class does not mean the same thing here as it does back home in Canada. At UCT you get to walk on a campus built into the mountainside, look out of your window while daydreaming in class and see all of Cape Town.

It is more than a concrete jungle, which is an overused term meant to describe universities in North America. With all this wonderful natural beauty mixed with the rich culture that South Africa has, it amazes me how much of an influence the USA has on us.

The other day I walked by the campus book store and read a poster stating “modeled on the

Ivy-league campus store concept”. Why Ivy league? Why are we so inclined to make ourselves resemble the American education system at all costs? Is that how we define success?

Some may say this is only a bookstore, but that is the point: it is only a small bookstore on campus that also gives a glimpse into what is happening behind the scenes. There was really no need to put that little statement up if it wasn’t meant to be a “Look we are legitimate!” stamp of approval.

The American education system is ranked 17th in the world, which is well below where you would expect such a dominant figure to be.

Wake up UCT, stop defining yourself with the shadows of other countries and their programs. Use what you have and make it work. Focus on what university is meant to be for: education.

The Americanisation of UCTThomas Guattari-Stafford

The VARSITY opinions article “Is love colour-blind?” caused somewhat of an uproar (especially on social media) after its publication two weeks ago. In my opinion, the article was highly problematic, in bad taste and, at certain parts, could be interpreted as inflammatory. My initial reaction to the article was anger and outrage.

Nonetheless, the article has raised some pressing questions, only one of which I would like to address in the next five paragraphs. Simply put: who has the right to hold VARSITY accountable for the content which it publishes?

To my mind, the consumer has every right to judge the content published by VARSITY. Sometimes the feedback will be positive, sometimes it will be negative. By and large, I think this does occur at UCT. “What do you think about the VARSTIY article on...” normally bounces around lecture theatres and tut classrooms on a weekly basis, following each VARSITY edition. And, in instances where an article is found to be offensive, readers have the right to criticise VARSITY

Who’s accountable?publically, as well as within the confines of their tuts and lectures.

On the other hand, external organisations, especially those with obvious political agendas, simply do not have this right.

After public outcry, the University of Cape Town released an official press statement which questioned the “editorial quality” of VARSITY. The SRC released an open letter (sent to national media agencies) which called on the VARSITY editor to publicly account for publishing the article. The Young Communist League went a step further – laying a complaint against VARSITY with the Human Rights Commission. The actions of all three of these organisations are simply unacceptable in a democratic society. The content of these complaints may

Tyronne McCrindle

Political party funding is currently a contentious issue in South Africa and specifically our almost complete lack of regulatory legislation. But why does it stir such emotional responses in politicians and activists alike? The answer lies buried in the sad reality of corruption and the lack of transparency that permeates South African politics.

My Vote Counts (MVC) is a civil society organisation that was launched last year, and whose campaign is centred on two key issues: party funding reform, and reform of South Africa’s electoral system. Both are important issues and both revolve around the fact that we need more accountability and openness in our political system.

The MVC campaign got me thinking about the funding of South African parties. But why does it matter where parties get their money from? Surely if corporations or individuals want to make anonymous donations to political parties, that is their business? The problem here is an inherent conflict of interest. If funds from Big Business X helped finance the campaign that brought a party to power, and that party’s government is now awarding tenders to upgrade roads in an area, and Big Business X is one of the groups applying for that tender…

Let’s just say that I don’t trust ANY of our political parties to behave well in that situation. And

Cancerous corruption in political bodies

the biggest problem is that I actually can’t find out if they do behave, because there is no law that forces parties to disclose where they get their funding from. What if the US or China is funding South African political parties and have more influence in policy-making than the citizens who voted those parties into power? We just don’t know.

And if you think that the corrupting effect that private money has on politics is being exaggerated, let’s have a look at a few examples where money has been privately

donated to parties. In 1999 Shabir Shaik gave R1 million to the ANC whilst procuring lucrative shareholdings for himself and the ANC in the “shady business structures” of the infamous R30 billion Arms Deal. Another R11 million was donated in 2004 to the ANC by Imvume Holdings, an oil company that had just received R15 million from PetroSA (a state-owned company) for oil procurement.

And it’s not just the ANC. Earlier this year it was revealed that the DA received sizeable monetary

donations from or linked to the Gupta family, whose company, TNA Media, would benefit from preferential treatment.

These private donations led to or have the potential to lead to irregular and corrupt spending by the government. According to the Auditor General’s annual assessment of government expenditure, unauthorised, irregular and wasteful public spending between 2008 and 2011 amounted to approximately R65 billion. To put this into perspective, that would pay for more than 1.2 million

RDP houses. The people most affected by this kind of corruption are not those living in the southern suburbs; they are the people living in Khayelitsha and Langa – the poor and vulnerable most in need of an effective government.

There is clearly an urgent need for party funding reform. Undisclosed private donations are a recipe for corruption. More than ever, South Africa needs transparent and accountable political parties if we are to make progress in the fight against the scourge of corruption that plagues our great nation.

wasteful public spending… would pay

for more than 1.2 million RDP houses

Image: Jessica BreakeyIm

age: www.flickr.com/ ctj71081

Image: essenceofparadise.blogspot.com

or may not be justified, but they should never have occurred simply out of respect for our democracy.

At an institute of higher education, I shouldn’t need to explain the fundamental role that free media plays in ensuring accountability of those in decision-making positions. The media should not feel any pressure by external bodies regarding what it can and cannot publish; they should never fear punishment in response to publishing any article. Consider the precedent which has now been set. Should VARISTY publish an article which portrays UCT/SRC/YCL in a negative light, will they again be publically attacked? We need to bear in mind that the interests of these external bodies are affected by which articles are published and which are not.

As consumers, we have a right to express grievances if the article offended us. If we value democracy however, then we should not tolerate politicised pressure on our free media. After all, VARSITY does not account to UCT, the SRC nor the YCL. VARSITY accounts to you.

P.S. My girlfriend is beautiful, regardless of what the survey insinuated.

7V72 E5 - 16 APRIL 2013opinions

Uthman Quick

While the South African media drum continues to

beat to the tune of race-row after race-row, paintings of the president’s penis and the sensationalisation of celebrity murder trials, an important and dangerous evolution of the country’s foreign policy is under way. This has somewhat changed since the events of March 24th when 13 SANDF soldiers were killed in the Central African Republic.

While the loss of the 13 South African soldiers is no doubt a tragedy, nothing is mentioned of the reported 500 “rebels” killed by our special forces. In fact, many have cheered on the fact that the South Africans who found themselves outnumbered and out gunned still managed to hold their own and bravely fought off hoardes of rebels (many of whom were children).

Just as the American military and their media cheerleaders use terms like “terrorist” or “jihadi” to dehumanise the hundreds of thousands of people killed in its wars of aggression in the middle-east, once the label of “rebel” is attached to an enemy combatant, their lives seem to equal very little. Without a shred of irony, we have taken on the modus apprendi of our former colonialist oppressors.

This is not to say that the rebel forces in the Central African Republic represent a positive revolutionary uprising. But how are we to distinguish them from the government that the SANDF was sent to protect? A government renowned for its corruption, mismanagement, human rights abuse and disrespect for peace agreements aimed at stemming continued violence.

What this botched mission, and others like it, indicate is that rather worryingly South Africa is willing to follow in step with the Western form of furthering its interests in

South Africa’s neo-colonialist movement

the continent through boots on the ground, rather than the diplomatic or monetary based methods of some of its BRICS partners.

Of course it seems rather ambitious to try and juxtapose Western militarism with South Africa’s “baby (soldier) steps” in CAR. The problem is that this form of foreign policy is often a slippery-slope that leads to further involvement in conflicts which really have nothing to do with South Africa.

Judging by some of the statements by government officials, it seems many have developed a taste for conflict – perhaps having seen too many military funded American war movies on e-TV. Those in the liberal media too have fallen into the dangerously ambivalent American public opinion: I don’t like the war, but I back our boys.

As if we were Bafana Bafana fans being asked to support the Springboks, we are coerced by

patriotic feelings into supporting the defence force, even if we are not sure what they are defending. If we truly backed our boys, we would not want them to die hundreds of kilometres from their homes or return with blood on their hands having slaughtered children for reasons even they are unsure of.

President Zuma’s answer is that South Africa is in CAR to work for peace and stability in Africa. However, many believe that, besides providing protection for the CAR deposed president, Francois Bozize, the main mission of the SANDF troops was to protect South African business interests.

In other words, the legacy of South Africa’s struggle against imperialism and colonialism is now well and truly dispatched to the annals of history while, as Frantz Fanon put it, the new colonial elite carry out their true "historic mission" which is the advancement of "a capitalism rampant though camouflaged".

Just Another Bricstrategic decision; a way to get a foot in the door to the emerging African market without having to navigate the uncharted waters of real under-development. They made the best possible compromise: use South Africa and all its development as a base to reach the other less developed African economies with a strong potential to emerge as global economic super powers.

In reality, Africa as a whole is not entirely ready to host the large influx of capital that investors are considering hoisting into the continent. High levels of Youth Unemployment, Illiquid capital markets, political uprisings, corruption, lack of basic infrastructure and the prevalence

of HIV/AIDS in certain regions still remain primary concerns of foreign investors.

H o w e v e r , South Africa in particular has

crossed many of the important hurdles on the road to becoming Africa’s investment destination of choice. The recurring problem is the very low GDP growth. This, in my opinion, is due to the general listless attitude towards entrepreneurship and private ownership of small and medium enterprises. South Africans need to move from the mentality of being owed to the mentality of going out into the world and taking what they believe is rightfully theirs. Entrepreneurship, with a foundation in innovation, is an essential catalyst for higher levels of economic growth.

The government is doing everything within its power to create opportunities. Now, it is up to individuals to take the opportunities that have been made available and transform them into businesses. This will result in productive activity in the economy, which translates into economic growth. The final steps to be taken towards South Africa living up to its name as a member of BRICS.

Temi Oketunji

With the recent conclusion of the fifth BRICS (Brazil, Russia, India, China and South Africa) Summit at the Durban International Convention Centre, it is quite alarming that many, including myself, had no idea what our initiation into the fraternity of emerging developing economies implied for South Africa. In my search for more information, it did not take very long to uncover the general crux of the matter.

The first discrepancy lies in the fact that Jim O’Neill, the Goldman Sachs Investment Banker who coined the term, never originally saw South Africa as a potential member of what was known as BRIC at the time.

Fast forward to 2011, South Africa has been a member of the Big Five for a year and O’Neill maintains his stand point. He said, “It’s just wrong. South Africa doesn’t belong in BRICS. South Africa has too small an economy […]”.

Looking at statistics for the countries in the Big Five gives substance to O’ Neil’s seemingly pessimistic point of view. In terms of GDP, South Africa ranks 28th in the world compared to China in 2nd, Brazil in 6th, Russia in 9th and India in 10th. According to Standard Bank Research, South Africa accounts for just 2.5% of the BRICS’ GDP.

Why then the inclusion into the fold despite all these contra-indications to South Africa as a major player in the global economy? The high GDP per capita growth, in some key African economies points to the fact that Africa is on the verge of an economic revolution. The Big Four would have been remiss not to affiliate themselves with said revolution.

Hence, it is not unthinkable that choosing South Africa as the fifth member of the group was a

a way to get a foot in the door to the emerging

African market

Richard McLean

Members of the privileged middle class living along the West Coast are singing the praises of the (relatively) new "MyCiTi" rapid bus transit system. The money and time saved seems like nothing short of a miracle, Tableview to Town in less than 45 minutes, and for only R10. I set out to explore how much of a "miracle" this really is.

In having used MyCiTi Buses myself a few times, I would be lying if I was to claim that this had not made my life significantly easier. It has matched the independence and ease of movement that the train line offers to anyone who lives close to it.

I engaged a fellow commuter on my way to Tableview one afternoon; I tried to see if he could find a single fault with the system. Every negative comment that I made about the MyCiTi System, he countered with an extremely positive reply. As this particular commuter is a cashier at an OK shop up north, it seems that it is not only the “privileged middle class” who are “singing praises”

MyCiTi -The white man's taxiabout the MyCiTi Service.

When I raised the question of “White Man's Taxi”, his response was that a MyCiTi trip from Tableview to Cape Town was R2 less than a taxi, and ten times more spacious (even during rush hour) In addition, although one may wait for a MyCiTi bus, the longest wait would be ten minutes.

But before we all start writing letters to Helen Zille to express our utmost gratitude, I should probably express a few minor gripes with the MyCiTi system.

When using MetroRail, the commuter pays for the distance that he intends on travelling, (i.e. if I want to catch a train from Rondebosch to Observatory, I only pay for a trip from Rondebosch to Observatory). However, this is a minor detail that the providers of the MyCiTi bus service have chosen to overlook.

Even if I only want to travel from Tableview to Milnerton, I still pay the same amount as if I was travelling all the way into town.

My other “gripe” with the MyCiTi system is the fact that it claims to want to “correct Apartheid's impact on the city”. Although my working class friend from Parklands is availed of such a service, I have not seen any move on the part of the Cape Town Metropolitan authority to extend this “wondrous service” into the parts of Cape Town where it is needed most, such as Gugulethu, Khayalitsha, Nyanga and the rest of the Cape Flats.

So, although it is not entirely accurate to call the MyCiTi Bus a “white man's taxi”, I still think that it is not doing enough to solve the problem of “Apartheid's impact”, as shown by the fact that it is unwilling to extend its services into Cape Town’s poorest townships. In order to correct the wrongs of the past, you need to offer your service to those worst affected by it. As such, it seems there is a certain “elitism” in the operation of the MyCiTiBus Rapid Transit System.

a MyCiTi trip from Tableview to Cape Town was R2 less than a taxi

Image: www.dailymaverick/images

“I see the fact that people found offence in this article as a good thing, not only for the fact that it should make them question why they found offence in it, but the article points towards a pertinent question: why are the youth so easily offended?

- Andriques Ché Petersen, The Fear of Offending, The Voice of the Cape

SNIPPETS FROM ARTICLES

There were elements of this that should rightly be called embarrassing, but levelling this charge was inseparable from a charge that frequently ac-companied it – namely that the survey itself was also racist (for some, that Varsity, its editor, or even the university was racist too).

“When passing an ostensibly offensive image like this pie chart around on social media, it’s easy to ignore context and fall prey to over-reaction. I doubt that many of us had read the accompanying article before allowing our instinctive outrage to prompt a reaction. I know I didn’t, so must confess to not heeding my own advice in this instance.”

It could be embarrassing in various ways, sure – but it’s also embarrassing that our knees jerk so quickly, and so violently, when anyone mentions the fact that people do still think in racial terms, regardless of the fact that we wish they wouldn’t. Outrage won’t make the problem go away, and neither will pretending that people don’t have attitudes we wish they didn’t.

- Jacques Rousseau, School of Management Studies, UCT, Race and the Seductive Moral Machine, DailyMaverick

University students have been

doing unorthodox things which people, who have

somehow forgotten their own rebellious streaks when they were

young, tend to find “shocking” or “disturbing”. It has always been the wont of

young folk to shake up the establishment as they exert their own influence on society. I cannot

understand why a little internal survey (c’mon its only sixty other kids) should have caused such a fuss.

Gary Gordon, Storm in a Teacup, Comment on politicsweb.co.za [http://www.politicsweb.co.za/politicsweb/view/politicsweb/en/page7161

9?oid=367902&sn=Marketingweb+detail]

TWEETS

Sarah Koopman @sarah_koopmanRT @TrendsCapeTown: VARSITY, @varsitynews is now trending in #CapeTown http://

trendsmap.com/za/cape+town » is this what you guys were after?

Sanele Zondi @IamZondiThe DA has been unsurprisingly mute about that UCT's @varsitynews poll on the 'most

attractive race'.

rémythequill @remythequill:#Varsity More than 80% of the people who were outraged by @varsitynews' article are just moral-majority sheep.

”

tatenda bertha @tatendaladyt"@ANC_YOUTH: UCT Black and Asian students do not deserve this. Racism is still real in Cape Town. pic.twitter.com/SIVVlfpD9W" cc @varsitynews

ZA MEDIA @ZA_MEDIA@SARVESHBALKARAN @ESETHU_U IT IS RACIST TO RUN A SURVEY ON THE LEAST AND MOST ATTRACTIVE RACE. IT SIMPLY IS.

MARISSA VAN RENSBURG @FUNRENSBURGFLU BE GONE!!! ABUSING MED LEMONS & STREPSILS. MAYBE IT'S THE @VARSITYNEWS ARTICLE, I SAID "IT MAKES ME SICK"...

This social media site is not as social as it pretends to be. Rather, Twitter is being used by some users to bully, badger and psychologically torment one another hidden behind the protection of the electronic curtain that is the internet. Equivalent to a girl’s bathroom wall, Twitter seems to feeds off rumours, mob mentality and momentary social outrage.Step in defamation law, dealing with libelous statements made by one person about another. Thus, as soon as someone’s reputation is attacked by a published statement - even if it is true, but not in the public’s interest to disclose - the victim will be able to take this issue to court.

So, dear Twitter and Facebook-users, beware of the consequences of your comments, tweets and re-tweets. The law has officially spoken: freedom of speech cannot be limitless, for the sake of protecting the right to dignity of the one ones under attack.

“

STUDENTS’ PUBLICATIONS ACT

PRESS CODE OF ETHICS

SOUTH AFRICAN CONSTITUTION

SECTION 16

THE “T WEET-AND-RUN” HABIT

BY STEFANIE BUSCH

10 V72 E5 – 16 APRIL 2013

Busang Senne

They say you should practice what you preach, right? It’s easy

enough (despite sweat-inducing deadlines and the seductive mistress of writers block) to sit behind a blank Word document and write about how I think you should live your life, but will this pseudo-journalist step out from behind the protective podium of public discourse and step out of the UCT bubble?

The answer is a definite yes: why wouldn’t I use an excuse to skip a day of lectures (I can at least check-off that from my 101 things to do at UCT list) and soak up the last of the Cape Town sun. So, that’s why I decided to set out and venture into the great unknown for this feature.

If you didn’t read the last VARSITY, I happened to mention the phenomenon of the elusive UCT bubble: looking at the rest of Cape

Into the great unknown

Town through a campus looking-glass but not truly experiencing it.

Sure, it’s easy to get out of said bubble when you have certain resources at your disposal but for me, a relatively broke, res-bound first year from the far away concrete jungle of Johannesburg, UCT can seem like the be all and end all of most of my current experiences. So what

about all the little things in between? And so my journey began…11.45am – The destination:

town. The means: the North Stop Hiddingh Jammie.

Noon – Because I am a slave to temptations of the pretty kind, I couldn’t help but go inside almost every arbitrary, indie-folk store on Kloof and Long Street. The Lot and

Alibi are definitely worth visiting if you like 90s grunge, pretty pastels and dresses that make you look like Zooey Deschanel.

1pm – I’m at a place called Yourstruly. Best. Coffee. Ever.

1.15pm – Who said an impromptu trip into town couldn’t be educational? Past the High Courts and onto the corner of

who said an impromptu trip into town couldn’t

be educational?

Natasha Bicknell

The first explanation I can remember hearing for the word “matie” had something to do with tomatoes. I wish I could remember the reason behind it – I’m sure it must have been interesting. The most widely accepted explanation for the nickname of our university’s students is that it is a play on the word “maats”. I’m sure most university students have that feeling of unity, even if it’s just a slight twitch of a smile when we see a person wearing a patriotic T-shirt or sporting a varsity bumper sticker.

I wouldn’t be surprised if the tomato idea had something to do with sunburn. Stellenbosch is known for being a little bit hot and many students like to hang out with the rest of their Maties on the Rooiplein – a wide stretch of grassy fields between red brick paths. This is also where the Neelsie can be found – the heart of the university (where the food is), as well as the library (more commonly known as the “bib”).

There is no shortage of entertainment on the Rooiplein (and campus in general). In the middle is a statue of Jan Marais (the man who made the creation of our university possible) whose wardrobe is unusually extensive - I’ve seen him donning a cape once and his shirt changes every now and then.

The entertainment is, most often, thanks to residences or societies. Sometimes we see flash mobs, sometimes guys galloping on wooden horses. Once I saw hundreds of red and white balloons being released into the sky, followed by paper aeroplanes. One never

The meaning of Matie

knows what to expect.I can’t say I know much about

the nocturnal nature of many of our students – what with the partying and all – but I do know that Wednesday night (or “Klein Saterdag”) is when the streets get busy. This isn’t to say that Maties aren’t studious – if you happen to pass by the Student Centre, you’ll see future scientists, engineers, philosophers and the like, bent over cubicle-like desks buried with papers. The air is so thick with concentration that it’s scary.

To find a parking in Stellenbosch

is always an adventure. Most students who drive in from elsewhere leave at the crack of dawn – it’s a common sight to see people fast asleep in their cars. Driving through the streets of Stellenbosch can also be quite a slow process – they’re filled with students and if there is a crossing (which there is, every few metres or so) Maties will walk without thinking.

They will, however, smile and thank you for stopping. And that Matie vibe is usually enough to bring a smile to your face – even if it’s just a slight twitch.

Inside Rhodes (in a non-sexual way)

where wine flows like water and the adage “Drink now: after university it’s called alcoholism” is thrown around a little too frequently.

Essentially, we are known for our drinking and commitment to the cause. But contrary to the belief of many of its students, Rhodes isn’t just a bar with some lecture halls attached. At the risk

of sounding sentimental (a state of being shunned by drama students), I would argue that our small b a d l y - p a v e d

portion of Grahamstown is more than that.

It is a melting pot, a home, a chance to begin again. Now is ideal opportunity to throw in some cloying metaphor about Grahamstown no longer marking the frontier of colonialism but of knowledge and acceptance (I’ll refrain). It is true, however, that, in the Eastern Cape particularly, the wealth divide is obvious and startling. Just beyond the privileged hub of campus, the townships lurk. An accusatory presence demanding to know what you as a student are doing to heal our country. Such a confrontation is as exciting as it is daunting, shunting into perspective the frivolity of student life and emphasising our part in the real world waiting just around the corner.

Despite the fact that the internet provides one of the only tenuous links to the rest of humanity (making us almost the ideal epicentre for a zombie apocalypse – seriously, no-one would know until it was too late), Grahamstown often feels like the warm heart of an exciting new world. This, of course, might be a sign that I have been there too long.

the schizophrenic weather will flit through

several seasons a day

Ananda Paver

Rhodes university. In my mind, the words are synonymous with walking your shoes through, desperately following the half-price food specials and crazy superstitions that speak of statues’ swords falling if someone graduates a virgin or failure if you walk under the middle of the Drostdy Arch. Not to mention irritating library announcements warning against theft which seem to wait until you’ve just regained your focus before battering you again. There’s also the schizophrenic weather that’ll flit through several seasons a day and the absurd tradition of naming ourselves after small furry creatures.

Asking a drama student to describe the Rhodes life is a brave choice, not only because we appear to find most outrageous things acceptable, but because we rarely escape the confines of the theatre long enough to get that insider understanding of what it means to be a Rhodent. To our credit, it is possible our distance gives us perspective – a window for satire, perhaps?

When we do finally peer out into the too-bright sunlight beyond the Drama Department, we often see those excitable figures strolling, skipping, stumbling past in purple-spattered overalls and come to the conclusion that it is O-week, Tri-Var, St Paddy’s, a Wednesday or some other excuse to drink and be merry.

Admittedly, Rhodes is often perceived as a den of iniquity

THE ROOIPLEIN: Stellenbosch equivalent to Jammie stairs:

Adderley and Wale Street you’ll find the Slave Lodge. Their motto? “From human wrongs to human rights.” For R15 (student discounts, for the win) you can walk about the exhibitions and explore the history of slavery in South Africa. The current exhibitions include The Words of Slaves, Material Women? The Shweshwe Story (think beautiful cloth with strong cultural significance and rich history) and O.R Tambo: The modest revolutionary’s life and career.

2.30pm – And because I am but a mere Joburg girl, my accomplice showed me a hidden gem near St. George’s Mall called Bread, Milk and Honey. I always forget what real food tastes like (thanks, Fedics) but this is the stuff I dream of after weight-gain Wednesdays: organic, deli delights and a slice of blueberry and white chocolate tart that changes lives.

So that’s a small taste of what you get when you pop the bubble of standard student life, and all under the cost of R100. Who knows? I might even conquer Cape Town one adventurous day at a time, and if you feel brave enough, so should you.

featuresSpecia l sect ion:

Burst ing the UCT bubble

Image: flicr.com/ 350.org

Image: flickr.com/ DanieVDM

11V72 E5 - 16 APRIL 2013

What was the biggest difference between Cape Town and where you studied, socially?

Amherst is a small student town where pretty much everything revolves around student life and the biggest highlights are the UMass-organised social and sporting events. There is such a great campus community, which is somewhat lacking in a city as big as Cape Town.

Benike Palfi’s semester abroadWhat was the biggest difference between Cape Town and where you studied, academically?

The courses in America were a lot easier. There were more assessments, making continuous work a necessity, but the essays were much shorter than they are at UCT and it seemed a lot easier to score an 'A'. That said, the library system there was a lot larger and it was incredibly easy to access countless resources from all over the country (and though this service is also available here, there were just so many more resources available in the US).

What kind of people would you recommend studying abroad to?

Absolutely everyone! It’s a fantastic experience that everyone should think about doing – there’s so much to learn from experiencing a different type of university lifestyle and being exposed to different academic teachings. That said, it’s also quite daunting to be in a different country on one’s own and

being completely independent, so it’s better to be open to change and being able to make adjustments easily.

What did the experience teach you (in non-academic terms)?

I learned a lot about myself – about what's important to me, where I want to see my life heading – a real eye-opening experience!

Did the university you attended have a student newspaper? Did you read it?Yes. I read some articles every now and then, but wasn't too fussed about getting the latest copy.

Did you stay in res? What was it like?

I stayed in post-graduate housing so I had my own apartment, but also had a roommate. I missed out on the typical “res” experience but it was also nice to have some more independence, some peace and quiet, and my own kitchen

and bathroom.

How was the food compared to Cape Town standards?

UMass had various dining halls, some of them with 'okay' food – the typical burgers, pastas and lots of Chinese food, but one of them had fantastic food, more continental, with sushi and lots of other specialities. But apart from that the food here is, generally, of a much higher quality – less fat, less sugar, and certainly more real.

What’s your top tip for someone looking to study abroad?

Be prepared. It’s often hard to plan ahead if you’ve never been to the country before, but try to research everything as much as possible – find out about societies you want to look into in advance, see which places in the country you want to travel to and plan a time for this (and make sure you have enough saved-up money) and, most importantly, let go of all expectations and let the experience rock your world!

What was the biggest challenge of your time abroad?

I got sick a lot and had to spend copious amounts of time in the clinic. UMass did have its own clinic and pharmacy on campus, which made life a million times easier, but when I had to get to a different hospital or pharmacy it was often quite a mission. And dealing with US medical insurance is a bit of a hopeless battle.

What was the best part about studying in another country?

Getting to experience a completely different university life. American universities have a much stronger 'university feel', especially when it comes to sporting events. It was great being able to experience that – attending football, ice hockey or basketball games, sporting the UMass colours, chanting 'Go UMass, Go', and just being caught up in the general excitement of it all.

Emily Robertson

UCT is a centre for excellence in academic studies where

thousands of students have come to further their education and arm themselves with the tools necessary to start a career. However, according to labour market analyst Loane Sharpe, there are an estimated 600,000 unemployed graduates in today's South Africa, a country with a population of 52 million.

Yasmin Codron of the Graduate Recruitment Bureau, an international recruiter for young talent based in the UK, states that, “Showing an employer that you have taken part in a volunteering programme is a fantastic example of how to make a strong impression as it gives you that extra bit of an edge.”

Head of Human Resources at Concord Architectural Lighting comments that “any types of volunteering will enhance the following skills: social interaction, empathy, teamwork, leadership, confidence, emotional intelligence, negotiation”. Yasmin Codron adds independence, management and proven ability to embrace responsibility to the list.

Having personally graduated from a UK University in 2001 with a CV full of volunteering and work experience, I wanted to know whether the reality of the new employment environment had hit South African universities.

Chloe Johnson is in her second year at UCT and her CV is full of volunteering experience. Most

Get employablenotably, whilst in grade 10, she set up a food garden and feeding scheme partnered with an under-resourced school in Ysterplaat. She plays down the overall experience by adding “it did not really teach me anything substantial that could further my knowledge”. What Chloe may not realise is how this experience might look to a prospective employer. It is obvious that she has demonstrated many of the skills on the employment hit list and such endeavours will stand her in good stead against other maybe less enterprising applicants.

I spoke with Louise Vaughn from local NGO Soil for Life about her views on the employability of young graduates. She states that “volunteering is your extended interview” as it gives you a chance to demonstrate many of the qualities hard to determine in a short interview.

Ben Ayme, founder of Benevola, has started a platform that links skilled volunteers with projects. “We currently have over a hundred projects listed globally whose requirements range from web developers, extra-mural teachers, surf instructors, project managers and marketing volunteers.” The website requires a R280 yearly subscription that funds the site and gives access to the application and community platforms. Not bad compared to the average R10 000 fees of other organisations.

So for anyone who, upon reading this, feels that engaging in some volunteer work is a proactive way to enhance their CV and improve their employability prospects, check out www.benevola.net and make the most of your time as a student. Malik Tokwe started volunteering at Soil for Life through Benevola and within three weeks Louise recommended him to a partner looking for staff; potent proof that exposing your skills pays off.

“volunteering is your extended [job]

interview”

EXPERIENCE POINTS: Malik Tokwe volunteering at Soil for Life.

Image: Emily Robertson

Name and SurnameBenike Palfi

What are you studying at UCT?English Language and Literature

How far along are you in your studies?

Master's Degree

Where did you study abroad?UMass Amherst in the USA

What did you study there?American Literature

How long did you study abroad?One semester

features

12 V72 E5 – 16 APRIL 2013 features

Daniël Geldenhuys

What’s a little theft among family? Technically, we’ve been squatters in our parents’ houses for years, manipulating them to pay for our education by using terms such as “Mommy” or “Daddy” to make their hearts melt. But lately us sons and daughters have been taking our crimes to the next level: we’re stealing from our parents closets.

You don’t need to be a Hiddingh student to know that stealing an item from Mommy or Daddy’s wardrobe is sure to give you that vintage-chic look that attracts numerous “I love your [insert stolen item]! Where did you get it?” comments.

So now that we’re officially in the chills of the fall season, what will be the best items to heist from our parents’ closets?

When executing your next closet-raiding vendetta, think V for Volume. The oversized trend is perfect for plundering the cupboard of another – depending on how far the apple fell from the tree, the clothes aren’t going to fit you anyway.

people’s private spheres are affected by political

decisions

Angela Kirykowicz

It is said that history does not always remember all players, all events or all coincidences. Events do not occur in a linear fashion and they often feed into more than one incident, or can influence multiple other events.

History, like all networked systems, is applicable to chaos theory – namely, that a seemingly insignificant event can have far reaching consequences because it can affect and is affected by the balance of a system, and hence can change the direction of that system.

The usual example given is that of a butterfly flapping its wings somewhere in the world causes a hurricane in another part of the world – this is known as “the butterfly effect”. If you think this is too far-fetched then consider that the act of flapping disturbs the air particles around the butterfly’s wings. This causes a cascade of subsequent changes that builds up over time which can change the balance of the air pressure in another part of the world, forming a hurricane.

Events separated in both space and time is what makes history lend itself to interpretation. Students of history will often be told that events are broken down into arbitrary timelines, which reflects the fact that it is open

to interpretation. The study of history is about evaluating the sources and attaching degrees of uncertainty to those events that the sources describe. The farther back the event is, compounded with the incompleteness and bias of records, the less stable the credibility of the account.

So why examine history through literature? During the feminist movement the slogan used to be “the personal is political” – that people’s private

spheres are affected by political decisions and hence people should take an interest in them. This was quite revolutionary at the time. The same could be said of history: it is personal and significant, just like politics. And what is more personal than literature, which is designed to illicit emotions and is often read in the comfort of the home? Even if it is not, the arrival of e-books makes your reading material practically anonymous.

No one lives in a social, moral or political vacuum - all works of fiction are influenced by that fact. Literature can tell us about the time in which they were written: what was happening, and how people felt about it. In essence it can capture lost modes of thought and, as is often the case, it is applicable to what is happening today, lest we want to invoke the old adage of “history repeating itself ”.

Go to varsitynewspaper.co.za to follow our new History Through Literature column.

Examining history through literature

Stefanie Busch

Oh, how many times I’ve been lectured over the past years about the dangers of Facebook – especially regarding privacy. Countless times I’ve shrugged such concerns off, mostly accompanied with the excuse that no one cares enough about a lil’ university student to bother to exploit the private details I post on Facebook.

Thus, we continue to update our statuses with highly personal details, ‘checking-in’ wherever we go and tagging countless pictures of ourselves. We keep on divulging more and more information to the public, choosing to follow the “ignorance is bliss” motto where it concerns Facebook privacy issues.

However, there has been a remarkable shift towards being suspicious, rather than blissful. Users are starting to examine the extremely extensive fine print they, mostly unknowingly, have agreed to when signing up on Facebook. Although these settings offer various opportunities to mould our privacy settings according to our concerns, I still have come across various spine-chilling facts when it concerns the privacy of our Facebook identities:

▶ CreepyFact #1: The introduction of Facebook ‘s newest brainchild, Facebook Home, essentially integrates the networking site as a central feature on Android mobiles, whereby Facebook essentially becomes the phone’s homescreen. Criticised as eroding any idea of

5 creepy must-know Facebook-privacy concernsThought Facebook privacy settings were protecting you? Think again.

privacy, critics have warned that the installation of this app will allow Facebook to track every move, call or action made on one’s mobile phone.

▶ CreepyFact #2: Ever wondered why the advertisements you see on the right-hand side of your Facebook page always seem to be well-tailored to your preferences? No, it’s not fate– it’s data mining. By collecting information according to which ads you have responded positively to or which pages you have liked in the past, Facebook analyses your preferences in order to show you exactly the ads you want to see. Facebook also goes on to share this information with companies and third party application developers.

▶ CreepyFact #3: Journalists have also resorted to data mining via Facebook. Unless you have modified your privacy settings, everything posted on your profile can be seen and rebroadcast to other types of media, as this information is already part of the public domain. Repeatedly, news agencies have made use of Facebook

comments and updates to showcase the happenings of a news event. You might just open up tomorrow’s newspaper to see your comment printed for the whole world to see.

▶ CreepyFact #4: Facebook can receive data from whichever electronic device you are using to access Facebook, including your GPS. Therefore, Facebook truly acts like that creepy ‘big brother is watching you’ cliché, by knowing, at every given time, where you are.

▶ CreepyFact #5: Planning an illegal activity over Facebook? Don’t. Government and local authorities rely on Facebook to obtain evidence and investigate criminal behaviour by serving Facebook with governmental subpoenas to provide relevant information. Although I don’t advocate criminal activity, it is quite daunting to realise that your private information can be made public on government request and can be used against you in court.

Feel an urge to re-read those privacy terms you agreed to upon signing up to Facebook? I know I do.

It’s a steal! Raiding your parents’ closets can be the best way to shop this season

Look for larger items that are well structured. The last thing you want is to walk around with droopy clothes: hobo-chic is not a thing.

Though I sincerely hope your father wasn’t your age in the 1920s, there’s a chance he may have acquired a double-breasted jacket during the escapades he calls his life. Steal it. He’s probably not wearing it (this will be your mental justification for every parent closet raid) and you’ll look much better in it. It’ll give you that Gatsby cool factor you probably didn’t know you needed.

Regardless of the emotional scarring, violent practice, and racist propaganda, your father having gone to the military is perhaps a good thing. Why? Because military is back this season (for guys and girls) and almost every chain store has a khaki green jacket with leather sleeves. Dad’s army-wear is (hopefully) not in stores nationwide, and therefore more unique. Also, it’s free.

But what of mother’s closet? Well. Since she’s been around much longer than you have, she probably had a lot more boyfriends than

you. (Unless of course you’ve been up to no good.) So, the chances that one of her boyfriends was rich and bought her very expensive clothes is quite good. Or maybe your mother is just rich. Search her closet for luxurious fabrics and bold jewellery (not cotton and polyester) that’ll make you feel like a modern day princess.

After putting sleeping tablets in your parent’s evening tea, sneak into their room and look for any old bags you can get your hands on. Not I-got-this-two-years-ago old. Really old.

Old old. Like vintage. An authentic leather briefcase, or something like it, is the perfect way to carry yours books around campus. And if MommaPoppa gets angry, just play the “it’s for my education” card.

So now all you lower campus folk are thinking: “this article is useless! My parents are miles away.” Well, to you I say write a letter or open a new email. Address it to your parents and begin as follows: Dearly beloved parent. Res is making me terribly homesick. I especially miss the smell of that oversized coat you have…

It’ll give you that Gatsby cool factor

Image: flickr.com/jasonstanley

Image: flickr.com/dansays

14 V72 E5 – 16 APRIL 2013 sportSPORTS BITES

Balotelli at it again

He’s set his house on fire with a firework, crashed his car, and even thrown a dart at a youth team player. Now, Mario Balotelli has another controversy to add to his name: it seems that the former Manchester City Striker has incurred the wrath of his new Italian paymasters by being caught smoking on a public train. The 22-year-old was reprimanded by a train official after being caught having a cheeky puff in the toilet, which is strictly illegal under Italian law.

- bbc.co.uk/sport

Irwin apology

Baseball team the Tampa Bay Rays have been forced to issue an apology after their mascot held up a placard mocking the death of Australian wildlife expert, Steve Irwin. Raymond, the club’s stingray mascot, held up the sign, “To Do List. 1. Steve Irwin [crossed out] 2. World Series”. The home-made poster had a picture of Irwin, known as the Crocodile Hunter, who was killed by a stingray in September 2006. A spokesperson for the club apologised, adding, “The Tampa Bay Rays regret that this particular sign was displayed in the ballpark, and we apologise for the lapse of judgement.”

- Metro.co.uk

“Le God” out of retirement

Former England international football player Matt Le Tissier has come out of retirement at the ripe age of 44 to represent his hometown side, Guernsey FC. The former Southampton legend and Sky Sports pundit is turning out for the little known island-based side in a bid to assist them in their fixture pile-up. The Combined Counties side are facing a staggering 17 games this calendar month and have already received national attention for their financial clout – flying fellow non-league sides from the UK mainland for their home fixtures.

- Thisisguernsey.com

Bottom-pinching fiasco

Slovakian cyclist Peter Sagan has caused uproar by pinching the rear-end of a podium girl after his second place finish in the Tour of Flanders. While the incident provoked uproar within the country, surprisingly, many Slovakians have chosen to support their compatriot by pinching the bottoms of strangers in solidarity. More than 4 500 people have “liked” a group that popped up on Facebook, challenging Slovakians to pinch a stranger’s bottom to support Sagan’s risqué manoeuvre – and post pictures of themselves doing likewise.

- Foxsports.com.au

Rob Byrne

Back from left to right: Bevan Adonis, Anesu Gwata, Helga Solem, Bisi Mtshali, Esther Sampson, Simangaliso Makalima, Nkululeko Zihlangu, Rebekah Boyer, Lukas Metzmacher, Wisy Namaseb, Sikora Cain, Joslin Kamatuka, Samke Miya, PJ Roberts.

Middle: Jessica Kosmider, Mabuse Kau, Jess Johnson, Jonathan Melamdowitz, Celine Cripps, Mari Kalmo, Lwasi Maziyav, Erica Ryan, Tracey van Heerden, Justin Alberti, Kim Atkins, Bianca Wilcox.

Front: Hayley Hazell, Lerato S’gubengu, Julia Cassar, Thami Mehlo, Janetta Deppa, Sandra Mkandawire, Thami Malusi, Talia Nimmer, Asanda Dlamini, Fairouz West.

YOUR UC T SPORT

Alex Tarr

The 2013 edition of the Steinhoff Varsity Cup drew to an end

last Monday, with Tuks once again emerging as the victors. Playing away from home against a team that had beaten them in Round 4 (Maties), being unbeaten themselves, it seemed unlikely that Tuks was in with a chance.

In the course of the tournament, they had also seen defeat at the hands of Pukke and NMMU. So

The day the Varsity Cup died

why were neutrals not elated when the apparent underdogs not only won, but did so in emphatic style, 39 points clear of the hosts?

The answer lies in the controversy that has stalked the team over the past two years concerning player eligibility.

Earlier this year, an audit was conducted into alleged breaches of the rules of the tournament, which require that a minimum of 18 players in any given match day squad are “bona fide registered students”. The audit found Tuks guilty of contravening this rule, but rather than docking the team points or suspending their involvement in the Cup, a reprimand was issued.

Last year, Tuks was found guilty of the same infringement, by the same auditor and given the same

punishment, which is to say none at all. Both years they took home the trophy.

This tournament is not just another rung on the ladder of professional sport. It isn’t meant to replace or complement the Vodacom or Currie Cup. It exists solely as a competition for individuals who are genuinely pursuing tertiary education at some of the finest institutions in South Africa and wish to represent them with ball in hand as well as pen.

When players such as Paul Willemse (ex-Lions lock and currently on Super 15 duty with the Bulls) and Wiaan Liebenberg (who scored a double for the Blue Bulls against the Golden Lions two weeks ago) run on in Tuks colours, they make a mockery

of the principles upon which the tournament was founded and dispel all reasons we had for switching on our televisions.

We have all been conned. Tuks students, who thought they would be given an opportunity to earn vicarious glory through 23 individuals chosen from their ranks, have been deprived. The rest of us, thinking we would be competing on an even playing field, and as gentlemen, have been scoffed at and insulted. The tournament will continue. Many Springboks will be produced and trophies won. Careers will be made. But everybody knows the war is over and everybody knows the good guys lost. With luck, the noble values of student athleticism may rise again one day, but until then, RIP.

They make a mockery of the principles upon which the tournament

was founded.

UCT women’s and men’s first football teams

TUKS OR NOTHING: The player-eligibility scandal took the gloss off Tuks comprehensive victory against Maties in the Varsity Cup final.

Image: Michael Currin

Image: Dustin Holohan

15V72 E5 - 16 APRIL 2013

The IPL circus

White line fever Rob ByrneSports Editor

Some of the best sporting insultsVIEWPOINTS:“Four more years,

boys.” Towards the end of

their 2003 World Cup semi-final win over the All Blacks, Australian

captain George Gregan points out to New Zealand they were

choking once again.

“Don’t bother son, you won’t be out there long

enough.”Fred Trueman make

a snide comment as an Australian batsman turns to shut the gate after coming onto the

pitch.

“Lie down so I can recognise you.”The arrogance of

American featherweight

boxer Willie Pep knows no end.

“I didn’t realise what I had said was that bad. I had heard a few of my

team-mates say the same.”David Beckham

defends his “hijo de puta” or “son of a whore” insult, directed towards a linesman in his Real

Madrid days.

“Only if there’s an outbreak of bubonic

plague.”Giovanni Trapattoni

gives a fairly blunt answer when asked if he would

select Paolo Di Canio for the 2004 Italy World Cup

squad.

sport

Saadiq Samodien & Rob Byrne

The 7th edition of the Keith Grainger Memorial Squash UCT Open (April 28 – May 4) will see a host of international players from England, France, Egypt, Kuwait, Iran and Argentina participating against some of South Africa’s finest talent.

The tournament, registered on the Professional Squash Association and Women’s International Squash Players Association calendars, will see both the SA men’s number two and women’s number one to participate, providing a stern test for local professionals and talented amateurs alike, many of whom have been little exposed to international competition.

Kerr Rogers, Sports Coordinator for Squash at UCT, says that this tournament will aid in players maturing their game. “Many SA players have never seen our local players play against international opposition, so are unsure as to how they will cope against professional international players. The matches will no doubt be tough with plenty to play for,” said Rogers.

“South African players are seeded

UCT Squash Open hosts international talent

number one and number two in both the men and women events, so on paper they should do well,” he added.

Milnay Louw, SA’s women’s number one ranked player is certainly one to watch out for. She is hoping to reach the top 20 in the world and keep her ranking as number one in South Africa, by retaining the 2013 edition of the tournament after triumphing in last year’s event.

On the men’s side, Shaun Le Roux will lead the fight from SA’s representatives. Currently ranked second in SA and 54th in the world, he is aiming to win this title in his hometown.

While all the hype and excitement of the tournament builds up, the meaning behind the event should not be forgotten. Named after Keith

Grainger, a UCT student between 1999-2001, the tournament is in recognition of his enthusiasm and input into UCT squash, despite suffering from both cancer and being an amputee. He died in September 2001 during his third year at UCT.

His focus and commitment to the sport, despite the adversity, earned him great respect globally and nationally.

In 2001 Professor Simpson, Chairman of the UCT Sports Council at the time, awarded Keith the Chairperson's Award posthumously, and his family involvement in the tournament continues to this day.

Thanks partly to his efforts, UCT Squash Club today enjoys great success, with the squash league having 71 members, and eight men’s and five women’s teams in the WP Squash Leagues. There are also 131

... the meaning behind the event should not be

forgotten.

Top five cricket sledges

not get bat onto ball. Thomas couldn’t contain his delight and said, “Hey Viv, it’s red, it’s round and it’s got a seam in the middle. Now f*cking hit it!” This clearly angered Richards to no end and he proceeded to bludgeon the next ball for six and replied, “Now you know what it looks like, go fetch it mon!”

5) During a Test match between Australia and Zimbabwe, Glenn McGrath was bowling to the lower order batsman Eddo Brandes. After being frustrated for an hour by Brandes, McGrath walks up to him and says, "Why you so fat Eddo?"

In an instant, Brandes replied, "Because every time I make love to your wife, she gives me a biscuit."

3) During the 1993/94 home and away Test series against Australia, South Africa’s Daryll Cullinan crumbled every time he faced Shane Warne’s “flipper” – which eventually led to Cullinan becoming Warne’s official “bunny”. So a few years later, a chubby Warne couldn't hide his delight when Cullinan walked stoically to the crease.

Warne: "I've been waiting two years for another chance at you."

Cullinan: "Looks like you spent it eating...."

4) During a county match in England, Sir Vivian Richards was facing Greg Thomas. The big-hitting West Indian was being beaten for pace and could

Alasdair Fraser

While South Africa may have long overtaken its Southern Hemisphere rivals, the Australians, in the test cricket rankings, they can still claim to be number one in one field – the art of sledging.

Many a test match has single-handedly been won by a chirp out in the middle – especially during the Aussies golden era.

It’s generally considered by the players themselves that what is said on the pitch stays on the pitch, but luckily some gems have been uncovered for your pleasure.

Often, many players resort to foul language but the best sledges are usually the clean ones. Here are a few “rippers” to make you forget winter is near.

Cricket sledge 1:Mark Waugh (brother of Aussie

skipper Steve Waugh) decided to give England's James Ormond a go as he walked out to bat in an Ashes test.

Waugh: "What are doing here? You're too sh*t to play for England."

Ormond: "Maybe so, but at least I'm the best player in my family."

2) There are times when verbal sledging can fall on deaf ears, so when Sir Vivian Richards hit Aussie speedster Merv Hughes for four consecutive boundaries, Merv’s response was to walk to the middle of the batting pitch, fart loudly, and say to Richards, “Let’s see you hit that to the boundary!”

A GENTLEMAN’S GAME? In the case of Andrew Symonds and Harbhajan Singh, sledging can go too far.

credit: virginmedia.com

A FAMILY AFFAIR: Natalie Grainger (sister of Keith) and Siyoli Waters battle it out in a previous women’s final.

Image: Kerr Rogers

The fireworks go off, the Cheerleaders prance around,

and I die a little inside. Yes folks, it’s that time of year - the IPL (Indian Premier League) circus is in town.

Being from the Northern Hemisphere, April used to signal the start of another cricketing summer, where South Africans, Australians and West Indians would face stinging frozen palms, and dream of heady August days when the mercury might touch 25 degrees.

Unfortunately, all that’s changed. No longer are some of the world’s best cricketers duking it out in frosty Cambridgeshire and Oxfordshire against the University sides. No, they are in the significantly warmer climes of India, presumably high-fiving each other, and having w h e e l b a r r o w races with piles of US Dollars.

I’m not opposed to the IPL, I’ve just grown bored of it. Much like any UCT student’s appreciation for jug night or Tin Roof, some things don’t last forever.

I was originally an enthusiastic convert to the tournament – it offered a nice slot (originally in March) between the end of any Southern Hemisphere international action, and the start of the county season in England – a bit of bish, bash, bosh to fill the void.

I even began to follow a team - the Rajasthan Royals. They had Shane Warne, and they won the inaugural edition of the tournament I even bought a shirt. Trust me, back then it was cool.

Then, once the players’ three-year contracts expired, the sides started afresh – only holding onto their top players and having to enter the auction process again to select their squads. The result? Sides losing their identity and a number of fans in the process.

I am not entirely critical of the

IPL as, after all, it was England that gave the format to the world; the Indians just pumped some steroids into the beast and introduced it to the mass market in the franchise format. They cashed in, and so has everyone else since.

In the process, T20 cricket has lost its gloss. I’m not heading to the antiquated “It’s just not cricket” argument, because the format is undoubtedly a good thing for the game – more people are watching

globally, more money is being injected into the sport, and new innovations have been developed due to the fast

and furious nature of the format.Nevertheless, as a spectator and

cricket fan I’ve voted with my feet. Did I go to a single RamSlam T20 this year? No. Have I sat through an entire IPL game this season? Not to date.

For some reason, I’ve found myself longing for a return to traditional ways. I’ve been feverishly following the in’s-and-out’s of county cricket sides, and when I think about it, seeking out alternative T20 tournaments such as Australia’s ‘Big Bash’ and even Bangladesh’s Premier League, for something new, something different.

I’ll no doubt watch the odd IPL game and grit my teeth through the cheerleaders and the fireworks, and I’ll enjoy the collection of world’s best plying their trade. But at the same time, I’ll return to the domestic scene in April because it has everything the IPL doesn’t – no fanfare, a real history, and a team I actually might care about.

I’m not opposed to the IPL, I’ve just grown

bored of it.

FIXTURES

SportVARSITY

Strong showing for UCT Athletics Club in Two Oceans

Half Marathon to the trail runs in Newlands Forest.

This year was no different and, as usual, our very own UCT Athletics Club did not disappoint as they used their home advantage to produce some exceptional results in all of the major races.

In total, the club had 12 runners participating in the grueling 56km Ultra Marathon and 40 runners taking on the 21.1km

Half Marathon.The Two Oceans weekend began

on Friday March 29th, with the trail runs which take runners through their paces in the Newlands Forest, just adjacent to the University. The best performers of the day were UCT’s very own coach, Dion Middelkoop, who came 7th in the long trail run (1st veteran) followed closely by Robin Dechant, who was 9th overall.

The next morning marked the start of the two most anticipated races of the weekend, the 56km Ultra Marathon and the 21.1km Half Marathon which saw runners lined up on Main Road in Newlands as early as 6am.

Before the races began, one could sense the excitement and nerves of all the runners, with UCT Athletics Club runners assembling at the start, greeting each other and motivating one another for the race ahead.

As soon as the national anthem was sung, the gun was shot which marked the start of the famous 21.1km race, the club’s most successful race of the 2013 Two Oceans Marathon weekend.

The club produced excellent results in the Half Marathon with a total of seven runners coming in the overall top 100 for the race. UCT’s best performers were Solomon Mthombeni (1.16), Michael Loseby (1.16), Michael McLaggan (1.19), Thomas Niven (1.19), Richard Burman (1.20), Matthew Henshall (1.22) and Byron Reeve (1.24).

In the ladies race, Jessica Pollock was placed 27th (1.30), a huge achievement considering her tender age of 19, while many of the club’s runners improved significantly on

their times from the 2012 race.UCT had 12 representatives in

the Ultra Marathon, with the best performance coming from William Robinson, one of the clubs most experienced and dedicated runners, with a time of 3.59, gaining him a much coveted Silver Medal. Andrew Wilkins (4.16) and Cecile Reed, the only female runner from the club in the Ultra Marathon (4.42), also clocked notable performances.

On the back of the impressive men’s performances in the half marathon, UCT Athletics Club will be hoping for a strong showing at the USSA Student Championships, scheduled for the end of April.

UCT Athletics Club are hosting the annual 10km Memorial Run on Sunday May 5th. This year, the event will include inter-res, inter-faculty and intervarsity competitions, offering competitors a chance to compete against their fellow students and colleagues. The race begins at 7am on Middle Campus and competitors are encouraged to get there early and engage in the spirit by entering a side, bringing any old shoes and clothes for the drop point, or even sporting fancy dress. For full details on entry and prizes, go to Sports Admin or the UCT Athletics Facebook page.

Thabang Letheo

The Easter weekend marked the most anticipated event in the Western Cape running calendar: the Two Oceans Marathon. The event brought together runners from all over South Africa and the world as they took part in various races ranging from the grueling 56km Ultra Marathon, the 21.1km

Megan Kinnaird & Rob Byrne

The time is fast approaching for UCT and Stellenbosch

to once again come head-to-head in the competition of competitions – Intervarsity.

The second successive Intervarsity tournament will take place from May 3rd to May 5th, after returning last year following a 19-year hiatus.

The games kick-off with squash at 5.30pm on May 3rd at the UCT Sports Centre, while the final fixture will be the golf event, taking place at Westlake Golf Club after which the overall

winning university will be announced. SRC Sports and Recreation

Coordinator Darren Brookbanks guided VARSITY through what we can expect from this year’s event.

Clearly excited about the forthcoming competition, he said, “Last year was the initial revival of Intervarsity, but this year is the official relaunch.”

Spectators can expect an expanded programme featuring more codes, competitors and institutions.

“Last year only Stellenbosch and

Revamped Intervarsity in sight

UCT participated in Intervarsity but this year CPUT and UWC have been included in the 2013 Intervarsity programme,” he said.

The Cape Town based institutions will be included in a number of the sporting codes, with fixtures against both UCT and Stellenbosch.

Despite this addition and the 19- year gap in Intervarsity games from 1993 to 2012, the traditional rivalry

between UCT and Stellenbosch is expected to be as ferocious as ever.

As always, spectators are encouraged to make the Green Mile a daunting prospect for Maties in the rugby encounter, a highlight of the weekend.

UCT will have to do without the services of their longstanding coach Kevin Foote however, as the former Varsity Cup winner is heading

East to Australia’s Western Force as Defence Coach.

Foote had previously been approached by the side and after consideration, decided to take the post off the back of a disappointing Varisty Cup Campaign. Instead, the team will be coached by former Springbok and Western Province Hooker Hanyani Shimangi for their league campaign.

The tournament is also a showcase

for some of the lesser known codes at UCT, and supporters are encouraged to see the diversity of sport on offer. Brookbanks is thus hoping for a bigger and better tournament this year in the face of some criticism of last year’s format, namely poor spectator attendance and a surprising lack of an overall- winner’s trophy.

While only time can tell if attendance will be better, the trophy situation has swiftly been rectified by the organisers. Kerr Rogers, of UCT Sports admin, commented that the structure of the revamped competition would ensure that “points are allocated per code, and the institution with the most points will receive the overall floating trophy”. The trophy will be awarded to the Vice-Chancellor of the winning university at the prize-giving after the golf on May 9th.

As opposed to the 22 sports categories last year, the 2013 event will boast no less than 33 separate sports, encompassing 700 competitors.

“With 33 of UCT’s 35 sports teams participating in Intervarsity during the course of one weekend, this is the biggest inter-university sporting competition on UCT’s collective sporting calendar,” Brookbanks said.

The odd number also ensures that there can be no overall draw, while new codes have also been added to the weekend programme, including cricket, canoeing, badminton and waterskiing.

ULTIMATE COMPETITION: The return of Intervarsity will see UCT battling it out across a number of codes.

Image: uct.ac.za

A SIGH OF RELIEF: UCT’s Byron Reeve, one of the club’s 40 half marathon competitors, crosses the finish line.

Image: James Evans

The Keith Grainger Memorial

Squash UCT Open

SUNDAY, APRIL 28 – SATURDAY, MAY 4

UCT SPORTS AND FITNESS CENTRES

UCT/SSISA 10km Memorial Run

INTER-RES/FACULTY/VARSITY COMPETITIONS

SUNDAY, MAY 5TH, 7AMKRAMER BUILDING, MIDDLE CAMPUS

“Last year was the initial revival of Intervarsity, but

this year is the official relaunch.”