articles on eft

7/29/2019 ARTICLES ON EFT

1/48

1


2/48

2

Published Articles of Tania A Prince, EFT Master

Introduction

This booklet contains a series of articles published in the EFT Insights Newsletter

from May 2006- September 2007

The original introductions by Gary Craig are also included.


3/48

3

Contents

EFT and the Power of Reframing 4-8

More on EFT and Reframing 9-13

Using EFT for Blushing and Fear of Public Speakingideas you can use almost

anywhere 14-18

Time and Reframing: An Easy Technique that Generates Fast Results 19-22

EFT and Reframing using Counter-Examples 23-25

An Example of Using Reframes with Addictive Behaviour 26-29

Metaphors, Humour and EFT 30-33

Using EFT for Bereavement 34-37

Using Humor with EFT 38-43

Finding and Dealing with Core Events 44-46

About Tania 47

Contact Information 48


4/48

4

EFT and the Power of Reframing

Publication Date: EFT Insights Newsletter: 22nd

of May 2006

There is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so.

Hamlet, Shakespeare

There have never been truer words said, we create our own meaning from the

experiences we have in life. Nothing is good or bad until we decide it is good or bad.

Since we create our own meaning we also have the ability to recreate that meaning to

one which serves to improve the quality of our life.

Reframing is an incredibly effective tool that therapists can use for helping the client

to change the way they think about their issues. It is the art of linguistically helping a

client shift the meaning they give their experiences, to a meaning which is moreconducive to health and well-being and living the life they want to live.

Reframing can be done without EFT. In fact it is commonly done in NLP (Neuro

Linguistic Programming) just in the context of conversation. However, combining

reframing with EFT in my opinion makes the reframes embed even better.

Hi Everyone,

EFT Master Tania Prince from the UK gives us her ideas on the advanced subject

of reframing. Reframing refers to helping a client see things differently and is

extraordinarily helpful in difficult cases. I've incorporated this concept for years

and consistently find that reframes "land" with the client much better when done

while tapping.

Tania sets the stage for us in her opening remarks and then gives 3 insightful

examples.

Hugs, Gary


5/48

5

The Benefits of Using Reframing

There are huge benefits into incorporating reframing into an EFT Practice. These

include increased flexibility which, of course, increases the success rate you have with

your clients. Another great benefit of using reframes is that it can make the session

seem very relaxed and informal, because it takes away the rigidity of the moremechanical EFT approaches, such as chase the pain etc. To the client it may well just

seem they are in a friendly conversation with their therapist, whilst casually tapping,

in reality powerful therapy is taking place, because the clients perceptions/ cognitions

are being subtly influenced in the direction of their goal.

The Art of Reframing

There is a definite art to delivering effective reframes. The therapist needs to be in

rapport with their client and also calibrated to the subtle communication that the client

is constantly giving them.

Reframing should never be confused with leading the client. Leading is pushing the

client to take on a new belief system, whereas reframing is far more subtle in its

delivery and is respectful of the client. Reframes are not forced on the client, the client

can choose to accept or not. And if delivered correctly this will not harm rapport.

In my experience the best reframes are those that just occur in the moment,

spontaneously without the therapist consciously deciding what to say beforehand.

Since the therapist has had different life experiences and thus different belief systems

etc than the client, it is quite natural that when the client tells their story, the therapist

has a different perspective on it than the client. This makes reframing easy for the

therapist.

Steps to using Reframes

Develop Rapport with the client

Calibrate to the clients body language and tonality (many EFTers have thisskill naturally and just term it as intuition)

Ask for content on the issue: content is essential in order to reframe

Basic Reframing

Years ago I worked with a client who had schizophrenia. When the client told me

their story, they spoke of an event in which they had laughed whilst attending a

funeral. The client interpreted this behaviour as meaning he was a bad person.

As he told his story, I asked myself, What else could this behaviour mean? The

thoughts that came to mind were, innocent like a child, naive, lacking in

understanding of the conventions of our society. When I reframed by putting this to

him, it created a change within the client, one which helped him see his behaviour in a

new light, one which supported him as a person in a much more positive way.


6/48

6

Although there are many different ways to reframe, the following are some of the

reframes that I have used in my practice. Some of the examples are fairly wordy

whilst others may just be one word.

Example 1: Reframing at an Identity Level

This is a reframe I used with a client who had experienced panic attacks for over

nineteen years, in fact since the age of about 6 years old. The client expressed the idea

that she was weak early within the therapy process. This is a common idea for

someone to have if they have had endless experiences in life where they have felt

extremely nervous. It becomes their identity. When asked to describe WHO they are

they instantly scan through all their life experiences and evaluate who they are from

the meaning they gave to those experiences. In this case the client had decided she

was a person who was weak because she panicked all the time.

After we had done some work on the panic attacks, tapping out specific events,

starting with the earliest she could remember, we targeted the belief, I am weak.

To set up the reframe, I told the client a metaphor, a story from my past that high-

lighted what I wanted her to do. The initial story was told whilst tapping on the karate

point and in a very conversational manner. At this point I already established

excellent rapport with the client.

Whilst tapping on the karate point I said, It doesnt really matter what happens in

life, it is the meaning you give to that event. For example, when I was in show

business I was driving home from a gig, one Sunday afternoon along the M6

motorway in broad daylight, with my two colleagues in the car, when two cars came

up and tried to force me to pull up. They had walkie-talkies and were working

together. So a potentially negative situation, but you know what, I dont see it that

way (Pause, calibrating that the client is following along) because I out-drove them

and out-thought them and left them behind.

And because of that event I know that in a potentially stressful situation, I am ice cool

and am a quick thinker. So in a way I came away with something really positive,

because if I hadnt have had that happen I might not know that about myself. And I

dont know, but if you were to think about that experience and if there were some

positive learnings to be had about you, what would you guess them to be.

The client listened to what I had said and processed it for a moment before replying,

I am a strong person, because I could have left after five minutes because I felt so

awful, but I stayed 90 minutes.

There are several points about this type of reframe that make it highly effective:

Point 1: I didnt offer the idea she was strong, although it certainly was what I was

thinking, I enabled the client to come to that conclusion herself. After she concluded

she was strong, I merely agreed with her, therefore confirming the conclusion she

had come to and therefore reinforcing it. Since the idea came from the client she isnt

going to reject it.


7/48

7

Point 2: The reframe that I did here was merely suggest the possibility that there was

something positive about her identity that she could learn from the experience, an

experience which previously she had only been able to think about in negative terms.

By using the word if, I am bypassing resistance to the idea that I am putting

forward.

Point 3: Neuro-logical levels are a model of therapy developed by Robert Dilts a well-

known NLP Trainer who has written many NLP Books. Within this model he cites the

different levels at which you can target a therapeutic intervention. The higher up the

model you go the more profound the effect. Identity is at the top of the model,

therefore shifting a persons concept of who they are to one that supports them, will

create a powerful shift through many other areas of their life. Interesting, that not long

after this reframe took place, the client went climbing on a practice wall at a leisure

facility, even though the panic had not fully subsided at this point as therapy is still

continuing at this point.

Example 2: I should have been able to deal with this

Another reframe that I use from time to time is one that deals with the idea often cited

by clients who have experienced years of panic attacks;

I should have been able to deal with this.

The way I do this is simply setting it up by asking a few questions whilst tapping on

the karate point.

The first question I put to the client was, Youve seen a doctor about the panic

attacks and did they sort it out for you? I then wait and allow the client to process

what I have put to them.

No. At this point the client is often curious about where you are leading them with

the questions. Curiosity is a great state for enhancing learning.

Then I continue: Alright. And youve seen a psychologist/ counsellor about it as

well, and did they sort it out? Again I wait and allow them to process what I have

said.

No.

Umm.(putting my self into a mental state of thinking) and yet you think YOU

SHOULD sort it out?

Often at this point the client begins to smile, as they begin to see their issue from a

new perspective.

I often take it one step further: So you expect you to sort it out when even those who

have studied therapy all of their lives cant. I usually do this with a sense of

amusement, because as the client realises the truth in what I have said, they also can

see the amusing side of it. In fact at this point it is not uncommon for the client to say,


8/48

8

I hadnt thought about it in that way before. This is very firm proof that the client is

now thinking in a new way about the problem

As a follow through I say, No one gives you a manual with HOW to deal with panic

attacks when you are born. As I am saying all of this I am following the clients

reaction to what I am saying to make sure that the reframe has effectively helped themshift the idea, I SHOULD have..

Looking at Robert Dilts neuro-logical levels of therapy again it is easy to see how this

reframe works. It shifts the problem to one that is about them, identity level issue to

one about their lack of knowledge in other words, they didnt know, HOW. Thus the

reframe shifts the problem from being a character flaw to just simply lacking a piece

of information.

Example 3: One word Reframe

Not all reframes have to be as elaborate or wordy as the ones above, sometimes theinclusion of a simple word is all that is needed.

The following is an example of one of the simplest reframes I have ever used. It was

used in a case where I was working with a client who had a dental phobia. I had taken

her back to two events at this point in the session, both of which occurred when she

had been in a dentists chair and had experienced extreme pain and discomfort yet had

to remain in the chair for a long time whilst the dental work was done. In the first and

earliest event, she described herself as thinking, Im going to die. I was using

extreme exaggeration in the reminder phrases. So when I started working on the

second event, amongst other things, Im going to die..again.

Well in most peoples lives they only die once, so by saying again, I am subtly

pointing out that they survived the first time.

Learning more about the Art of Reframing

As with any skills, practice makes perfect. The more experience you get using

reframes the better you become. However I would highly recommend reading Robert

Dilts book called, Sleight of Mouth. This book covers multiple ways of reframing

and is an excellent resource for those who would like to truly master this art.

Tania A Prince


9/48

9

More on EFT and Reframing by Tania Prince

Publication Date: EFT Insights Newsletter: 25th

August 2006

In a previous article on reframing I highlighted different ways to reframe and help

clients gain new perspectives on their issues. This article is a follow up that further

expands on the use of reframes with EFT.

Reframing is a fantastic tool to have at your disposal as it can help make sessions very

relaxed and informal. Reframes also can bring about powerful changes that can be

extremely fast even with difficult issues.

In this article I have highlighted two reframes that I used with clients. Both of thesereframes worked instantly, collapsing emotions the moment they were used.

Although reframing may look complex, it is in fact extremely easy to learn. I have

included some tips to help make reframing easy at the end of this article.

Recap on Reframing

When we work with clients and help them clear their issues, the way they think about

their problems changes to one which is more conducive to their health and well-being.

Commonly clients will often make comments after clearing an issue such as: it seems

insignificant now, or I see it differently. This indicates a change in their thinking(reframe).

Reframing is the art of conversationally helping clients shift the way they think about

their issues. It is a technique commonly used in therapy. When reframing and EFT are

used together they can be an extremely powerful and effective combination.

There are many different ways to reframe. Below are just two of these.

Example 1: Uncovering the Unconscious

The example below highlights a case in which the reframe had an instant result.Interestingly enough, the trainee/client used the same reframe on a client of hers

Hi Everyone,

An interesting feature of EFT is the belief change that often occurs during the

session. This can be enhanced by the proper use of reframing (i.e. pointing to new

perspectives). Tania Prince gives an important boost in this direction by expanding

on her previous reframing article.

Hugs, Gary


10/48

10

shortly after this session and had the very same result, i.e. the emotional intensity of

the issue dropped to zero the instant the reframe left her mouth.

Case: Anger about Sixteen Years of a Bad Marriage

a) Background to the Intervention

Whilst running a recent EFT Level 3 training course, two of the trainees were working

on an anger issue, which instead of going down in emotional intensity as they tapped,

was steadily raising to the point where a volcano was about to explode.

Background to the case is that the client/ trainee who had the issue with anger had

been in an abusive marriage for 16 years. Although she was no longer in that

relationship, she still had a lot of unresolved anger about what had occurred during

that time. In fact, she had so much anger and other emotions around the marriage that

she had put off working on it, simply because it was the One that you do not want to

deal with (Clients words). Finally she decided that the time was right to deal withthis issue. In a practice session with another trainee/ student she started to work on it.

I joined the practice group in time to hear that, as they started to tap, the anger was

increasing. They had already directly tapped on the anger itself and also on the not

wanting to let go of the anger, neither of which had resulted in a decrease in the

intensity.

b) Identifying the Reasons behind Holding on to the Anger

When I joined in the group, I asked the client to tap on the karate point whilst I

questioned her about the problem. The first question I asked was:

What would happen if you let go of this problem?

This question identifies whatever benefit the client is getting for hanging on to it. The

client said:

It would mean that the sixteen years I stayed in that marriage was a waste.

I simply replied, Alright, accepting her statement at face value, thus maintaining

rapport. Then, continuing to tap on the karate point, I had the client say:

Even though I feel REALLY ANGRY, (using tonal emphasis to reflect the true state of

her anger)I completely and totally love and approve of myself.

We repeated the statement three times and then started tapping on the points starting

at the crown of the head and going down through the eyebrow etc. As we tapped

through, I changed the reminder phrase slightly to reflect the reason she wasnt letting

it go.

If I let go of this anger it will mean the sixteen years was a waste. This statement

paces the client, especially since the tone of voice I used when I said these wordsmatched hers.


11/48

11

Then I reframed the statement by saying,

So holding on to this anger means it was all worthwhile.

The anger dissolved instantly. As usually happens after a reframe like this, she moved

on to the next aspect of the problem which was feeling stupid for staying in themarriage for 16 years.

Clients Perspective

I think when you analyse how this worked; it is useful to understand what went on for

the client at the moment the reframe was used. The following information was kindly

provided by the trainee/ client.

She said, It stopped me in my tracks, put it all into place, it just became ridiculous to

hold onto it. All the anger from the sixteen years was gone.

Further she went on to say, It had been part of me for so long, that it is a surprise

that there is nothing there.

After this intervention, all the anger from all the events during the sixteen years of

marriage was gone.

In the weeks following she said, I tried to get it back..out of curiosity. It was

not possible.

Breakdown of the Reframe

Basically the client said that letting go of the anger would mean that the sixteen years

she stayed in the marriage would be a waste. By that very same logic, you could say

that holding on to the anger made staying in the marriage for sixteen years

worthwhile. In this reframe I merely fed that back to her whilst tapping. Seeing it

from this angle resulted in her letting it go immediately.

Example 2: Using Counter-Examples to Reframe in a Case of Alcohol Addiction

This reframe took place about half-way through a session, after we had evaluated

what the clients goals were for therapy, and where he was currently as regards tothem.

Near the beginning of the session the client had said me that he had real physical

problems associated with his drinking, that he had vomited blood and had had

problems with his liver, and yet even knowing this he could not stop.

I started the EFT by evaluating how bad he felt at the thought of never being able to

drink alcohol again in his life. He said it was a ten at that moment on a scale where

ten is the worst he had ever felt about this.

We tapped through on the statement,


12/48

12

Even though I feel deprived that I will never be able to drink alcohol again in my

life.

After one round this dropped to a nine, which is a negligible shift. We tapped through

again and again it barely dropped.

Third time, I asked him to tap on the karate point and set the statement up,

Even though I feel deprived that I will never be able to drink alcohol again in my

life.

Whilst doing this we continued to tap on the karate point as I asked for clarification as

to deprived meaning,

Feels like a sense of loss?

I just used a tonal shift in my voice to pose the question. The client indicated that theword loss was right. As I clarified that, I had his exact meaning. I then extrapolated

and asked,

Is that loss of pleasure?

Again he indicated that I was right.

At this point we started to tap to begin the round.

So even though I feel deprived, a sense of loss that I will never have the pleasure ofdrinking alcohol again in my life..

We repeated this three times and then started to tap through the sequence, repeating:

Deprived, loss that I will never be able to have the pleasure of drinking alcohol

again in my life.

As we reached the under eye position I said,

Did you say you have vomited blood because of drinking?

The reaction was instant. He let out a laugh and stopped tapping.

The feelings around this specific issue had gone completely.


13/48

13

Breakdown of the Reframe

At the beginning of the session the client is clearly associating the idea that:

Alcohol equals pleasure. This reframe works by presenting the information, alcohol

does not equal pleasure to the client.

It also works because the reframe is presented as a question. Thus the client has to go

inside and access times that alcohol does not equal pleasure to answer.

As with all reframes, timing is essential for this to work. Intuition was used for

knowing when to say the reframe.

Tips on Learning How to Reframe

1. Tap out Blocks to reframing

2. Read articles and books on reframing3. Watch the EFT Borrowing Benefits Series

Reframing requires the therapist to get themselves out of the way. What this

basically means is that you need to just trust your intuition and go with whatever pops

into your mind without pre-planning. In order to do this, it is very useful to use EFT

to tap out any blocks you may have about reframing, such as, it is too hard; Ill

never be able to do that. Simply set each block you have into the EFT statement and

tap it through until it is no longer relevant to you.

Tapping out blocks around learning is another good area to concentrate on; many

people try to force knowledge into their minds by constantly repeating the material

etc. However people have amazing abilities to take on board a vast amount of

information extremely well. The mind learns best when very relaxed. Therefore you

might just be pleasantly surprised that when you have tapped out your blocks,

reframes just pop into your mind at the relevant moment, as they did with the client I

worked with in the first case in this article.

In the words of the therapist/ client herself, she said,

It struck a chord as soon as she said it (her client).

When you are in the moment, it flows.

Tania A Prince

P.S. A good book on reframing is Sleight of Mouth by Robert Dilts


14/48

14

Using EFT for Blushing and Fear of Public Speakingideas you can use almost

anywhere


October 2006

Introduction

Finding the root issues can often be the key to success when using EFT. Clients

however, are not always aware of what event or events created their problems. Even if

they are aware, it may seem so vague to them that they can actually think they are

making it up.

The following is a case I worked on recently where one of my trainees suddenly

developed an absolute fear of demonstrating EFT in front of her peers. That fear was

so great in the mere moments in which she became aware of it, she re-evaluated her

whole career plans because of it, and decided that she would need to change direction

in her life to avoid ever being in this kind of situation again.

The following took place over two sessions. The first lasted about twenty minutes, the

second about five minutes. In the first session, EFT was used to retrieve the memory

of an event from the past and then to clear it. In the second session, EFT was used to

deal with her issues about being judged.

I have written this account after consulting with the trainee and gaining her

perspective on the work done and the internal thoughts and emotions she was

experiencing through the session. I feel it gives useful insight into this type of issue

and the effect it can have upon a persons life.

Background to the Case

At a recent supervision session, one of the attendees suddenly became struck with fear

as I mentioned that the next exercise involved working in front of the group with one

of their colleagues. Previous trainees had found this exercise to be incredibly useful as

a learning tool.

Hi Everyone,

This quality article by EFT Master Tania Prince from the UK traces through the details

of a difficult stage fright case and reveals methods for getting behind the scenes and

finding core issues. A creative reader will readily see how parallel investigations would

likely apply to a wide variety of cases.

Hugs, Gary


15/48

15

As soon as I said this, the trainee began to shake, although she did not inform anyone

in the group of how she felt. She was totally taken aback by her own reaction since

she thought of herself as a very confident person, and had previously no problem

talking in front of groups of people.

The more I spoke about the exercise that we were about to do, the more extreme hersymptoms became. She began to feel, light headed, and had the thought, no way

am I going to do this. In fact she almost decided to make excuses and leave in the tea

break. She felt like she needed to get out of there. These are typical reactions that

occur when the body/ mind perceives itself to be under threat, whether that threat is

real or not.

She felt unsettled through the break, couldnt concentrate, talked very little, and didnt

want to drink or eat. She felt sick and shaky. She had reached the point where she

dreaded heading back to the course room. However she did go back.

As I continued to set up the exercise, she turned to the girl next to her and said thatshe didnt feel she could do the demo. The girl beside her took on board what she was

saying and then drew to her attention the fact that her neck and chest were blotchy.

Instantly the problem ramped up a couple of degrees and now she became faint and

felt even sicker.

At this point she told me that she couldnt do the demo. In fact she said she had an

internal voice which was point blank saying, NO!

I questioned her about what was going on for her, after clarifying that only if she was

totally OK with demo would she be expected to do so. I then asked if she was OK

being the client. She felt fine volunteering to play that role.

Using EFT, her fellow trainees were able to shift most of her symptoms, in fact all but

one, which was the heat in her face that came up as they began to work with her. At

this point it was really interesting because she said, I now feel really comfortable and

calm knowing that I am just not giving this demo. The insistent voice in her head

had not shifted one bit , it was still as adamant she wasnt going to demo in front of

the group and that she was never going to put herself through this type of thing ever

again. In fact she was now considering cancelling her client session due to take place

the following morning.

Throughout the previous work done by the trainees, she had said that she didnt know

where this was coming from although she had a sense of multiple events. These

however seemed vague, and she also added that she wasnt sure if she was making

this up.

Curious as to where this would take us, I decided to work with her and use EFT to

explore this angle.

Using EFT to get to a Root Event

Whilst tapping on the karate point, we put all the pieces of information that she hadsupplied into the EFT statement as follows:


16/48

16

Even though, I have this NO and it might be connected to early multiple events in

my life and it seems vague, and I dont know what those events are, I completely and

totally love and approve of myself.

We tapped through the EFT sequence, using words from the initial statement, such as;

I have this definite NOit might be connected to multiple vague events...I

dont know what those events are?

I then asked if anything came up for her or popped into her mind, whilst we continued

to tap on the karate point.

She said it seemed a little less vague, but she didnt know if she was making it up.

I said it didnt really matter if we did make it up as we could tap this out and that it

would be totally OK.

And then I said, If you were to guess an age, what would it be?

She said, Seven

And if you were to guess where you were, where was that?

In School

And if you guess what was happening?

I was reading in front of the class

And if you were to guess what happened then, what happened?

I didnt know a word

And then what happened?

I paused and then my friend had to tell me what it was

This was obviously the point where a big emotion hit her as a child, as she hadblushed and felt embarrassed and had a sense people had laughed at her.

At this point having elicited the information we began to tap through the event, just

putting together all the bits of information that we had elicited.

So even though, I was only seven years old..

As we tapped through, I exaggerated certain points and just went with whatever

popped into my head.

Oh the shame of it, I was seven years old and I didnt know AWORD.


17/48

17

After tapping through she now seemed to be seeing the event differently and thinking

about it differently than she had done at the beginning.

However it is really important to check thoroughly, I asked her to, try and bring the

memory back, make it vivid, get inside her body etc, what happens?

She said that although most of the memory now seemed distant, certain points she

could still see as bright images. This is a clear indication that the whole of the event

was not cleared completely. We then concentrated on what was happening in the

clear/ bright images that she still saw.

Tapping these bits through resulted in the whole image being distant, fuzzy and

seeming unimportant to her now, like a non-event.

I then asked her to check with the voice in her head that had been saying, No!

She said that it had changed to not now, but maybe in the future

We terminated the first session at this point.

She had originally said that she had a vague idea that the problem was associated with

multiple events from her past. Therefore I felt as a therapist that maybe using Garys

metaphor of the table top, which is the overall problem in this case the fear of doing a

demo in front of the group and the legs beneath the table being the specific events in

that persons life which had led to the creation of the problem., we had taken out one

of the legs and effectively destabilised the table to some degree.

Two Days Later Over the Phone

Initial Evaluation of the NO in her mind was now, 20/30% of the original intensity

When I started, my original intent was to find another leg under the table (using

Garys table metaphor) and take it out; however, I just went with the flow and ended

up tackling it entirely differently as seen below.

Even though I have this No in my head which is somehow related to judgement, I

totally and completely love and approve of myself.

As I went through the set up I changed the wording of the affirmation to maybe I can

make the realisation that to judge is their choice(pause)and my choice is

to accept it (pause).OR NOT

This made an instant impact.

She then said, of course we are judged all the time. It was as if a sudden realisation

had occurred to her. In the trainees own words she later said, This statement seemed

to collapse things completely and really ring true with me.


18/48

18

Breakdown of the First Session

When I was working on this issue I was very much in the moment going with

whatever popped into my mind. However there are certain points that perhaps explain

what occurred during these sessions.

Saying to the client that it was OK to make up what occurred, as we couldequally work with the invented memory, resulted in her being open and

stopped her challenging what was popping into her mind.

Asking her to GUESS, the age, location and event itself also helped access the

memory

When we process the information in our minds about our experiences in life,

we have pictures, feelings and hear sounds. We may also have a smell or taste

associated with events. It is really useful to check that the memory is fully

cleared when you work on it by checking through these systems thoroughly.

Breakdown of the Second Session

Everyone has their own opinions. We are constantly judged either good, bad or

indifferent. However, we do not need to accept that judgement. We can choose to

accept the bits that add value to our lives and dismiss the bits that dont.

Follow Up to the Case: One Week Later

Speaking to Paula one week after we completed working on this issue, I asked if she

had noticed anything different about her life.

She said that she had noticed two things:

1. Firstly, that she had woken up one morning bursting with new ideas for her

business.

2. Secondly, that when she attended a business meeting with an advisor from the

Chamber of Commerce, instead of acting as if she was eating humble pie,

she was proactive and felt totally at ease and equal in every way to the advisor.

As a result, the meeting seemed less formal than her first meeting. She also

noticed that as she walked out of the meeting the two chairs in the room used

for visitors were of a different height one small and the other same height as

that used by the advisor. The first time she had attended, she had automaticallyheaded for the smaller chair thus leaving the advisor looking down upon her.

This time however she automatically headed for the chair that put her at an

equal level with the advisor.

Final Comments

I would like to thank Paula for working with me on this article and being gracious

enough to share her story and experiences

Tania A Prince


19/48

19

Time and Reframing: An Easy Technique that Generates Fast Results


October 2007

Introduction

Mastering the art of reframing is one more tool in your therapeutic arsenal that can

help you become even more effective in gaining results using EFT. Reframing is also

fun for both the therapist and client. With that in mind, this article contains

information on a stunningly easy, fun reframe. It is one I commonly use.

What is Reframing?

Reframing is the art and skill of helping people change their perspective and view on

their issues. Reframing is a powerful therapeutic tool that can create profound and fast

change. EFT and reframing are commonly combined. There are many different types

of reframes that can be used. The particular method highlighted in this article is a very

simple and powerful method that I have used many times highly successfully. It is

also easy to use and master.

Example: Dealing with an Alcohol Addiction

The following case was taken from the work I did with Carmen (not her real name), aclient who had an alcohol addiction. At the point in the therapy where we talked about

the below we had already made massive progress with the clients drinking issue. She

had stopped and was now only having an occasional rare binge.

Questioning her about the binges, Carmen said they only occurred when her boyfriend

went out. Whenever he left the house she had a sense fear that something dreadful

would happen to him and that he wouldnt come back. She went on to explain that this

feeling had been something she had experienced throughout her life. (This statement

implies that the causative event for this feeling was early in her life).

Finding the Core Event

Hi Everyone,

EFT Master and expert reframer Tania Prince gives us this advanced article. In her

intro she says, "Mastering the art of reframing is one more tool in your therapeutic

arsenal that can help you become even more effective in gaining results using

EFT. Reframing is also fun for both the therapist and client. With that in mind, this

article contains information on a stunningly easy, fun reframe. It is one I

commonly use."

Hugs, Gary


20/48

20

I asked Carmen to access the feelings that she had when her boyfriend left the house.

When she had accessed her feelings, I asked her where they were in her body and

asked her to put her attention on those feelings. We started to tap on the karate point

and I asked her to keep her attention on the feelings and go all the way back to the

very first time she had ever felt those feelings. (This technique can be read in moredetail in a previous article I wrote called, Finding and dealing with core issues)

When asked what event had popped into her mind, Carmen told me about a time when

she was about three years old. She was crying on the stairs in her house. Mum and

Dad had gone out and she woke up and started to go down the stairs of her home. She

had stopped half-way and was sobbing.

Shift between then and now

Karate Point: Even though I was three years old and no one was there, I am all

alone, I completely and totally love and approve of myself

Karate Point; Even though there was no one there and I was frightened, I completely

and totally love and approve of myself

Karate Point: So even though they left me and no one was there, I completely and


Eye Brow: I was all alone

Side of the eye: No one was there

Under the eye: Theyd gone, mummy and daddy were never coming back

Under the nose: I switched tonality at this point and directly addressed the adult client

and asked;

How long was it before they did come back?

She laughed and said, I think it was a few minutes, not long

Chin: Switching straight back to the tonality and tense I had used before I had askedthe question, I continued, I was all alone

Collarbone: They are never coming back

The words that I am using here when saying, I was all alone, reflect Carmens 3

year olds point of view.

At this point we stopped as Carmen was now finding it highly amusing. She

obviously had shifted her original emotions.

How does this Reframe work?


21/48

21

Reframes work by first identifying what your client isnt seeing YET.

In time reframes this tends to indicate that the event is over. When you consider the

above case that means: Mum and Dad came back. Carmen was locked into the

perspective of the 3 year old who was alone and frightened and didnt know whether

her parents would come back. It is like a moment frozen in time.

The second step is deciding how to communicate that information in an

effective way without forcing it.

There are many ways to communicate that the issue is over and in the past. You could

tackle it directly with the statement as you tap: It is over. However in my opinion,

asking the client the question: How long was it before they came back? is a much

more subtle method of presenting this. Also, because of the subtly of it, it is much

more likely to be accepted without resistance.

Other examples of similar Reframes

Another example of using this type of reframe is with the fear of public speaking;

people feel very anxious waiting their turn to speak. When a client comes in and

mentions this I ask them if they can get that nervous, waiting feeling now.

A lot of clients say yes to this question. When they are able to get the feeling while in

my office I use the method I described earlier and trace that feeling back to where it

began - their first experience of it.

When they then report when, what was happening and how old they were at the time,I then set the EFT up whilst tapping on the karate point. I simply restate their problem

back to them using there words in the setup. Such as;

So even though I have this nervous feeling in my (state where it is),I was waiting and

I didnt know what was going to happen, I was frightened, I completely and totally

approve of myself

Basically I am pacing their issue. Pacing helps you gain and deepen rapport. Rapport

is crucial to getting results in therapy.

After doing the setup three times we start the EFT sequence with;

Eyebrow: I was waiting

Side of the eye: I didnt know what would happen

Under the eye: And Im still waiting, (then I switch and address the client directly);

Whilst still tapping under the eye: How long ago was that?

Often clients will give an answer like;

30 years ago


22/48

22

Then I go straight back into the EFT again;

Under the nose; Im still waiting, thirty years later

Chin: Do you think it is OK to let it go now? Or maybe you might like to keep it for a

few more years?

Clients often laugh at this and as they do the issue often crumbles instantly.

Sometimes however I play with this and tap on, No, no, Im not letting it go, Im

keeping it for another thirty years.

Technical Points of Reframing

Reframes work best when delivered at the right time. It is a point of intuitive knowing

that occurs. This awareness comes with practice and clearing blocks to intuition

doing YOUR own work.

With Carmen, who was having alcoholic binges when her boyfriend left her the

reframes during EFT worked instantly and created a profound shift for the client.

Even though we were dealing with something that had been highly distressful for

Carmen when it occurred, the session itself was very light, both of us enjoying the

experience. In fact we laughed through most of the session. Reframes done properly

can be immensely effective AND can be FUN!

Tania A Prince

EFT Master


23/48

23

EFT and Reframing using Counter-Examples


September 2007

Following on from my previous articles on EFT and reframing, this particular article

concentrates on a very simple yet stunningly effective reframe. This type of reframeoften creates an instant result. I have found it particularly effective with addictions. As

with all reframes there is an art and skill to using it.

Smoking and the Counter-Example Reframe

One of the things I generally address when I deal with a smoking issue is what caused

the person to smoke in the first place. What was their original motivation? For many

people the first time they smoke is not a comfortable experience, something powerful

has to be happening at an emotional level for the person to persevere. People often

assume because they are older and that the original circumstances of when theystarted smoking are no longer relevant to them that these programmes are no longer

running, however that may not be the case.

When I work with an issue such as smoking the objective of the session is to eliminate

ALL emotions around cigarettes so that the person no longer loves or hates cigarettes.

The objective is to help the client become indifferent to them.

The case I used in this article took place a couple of years ago. It involves a woman

who had smoked since her early teens.

Finding the Initial Motivation Event

The question I asked to find out what had originally motivated the client to start

smoking was:

What would you guess the initial event was that led to you wanting to smoke, you

might not have smoked at the time however it set the scene for that?

The client immediately said that it was an event very early in her life when she had

watched her aunty smoke. The aunty had used a cigarette holder and in the clients

words looked really, glamorous. She remembered thinking that she wanted to be

like that.

Hi Everyone,

EFT Master Tania Prince from the UK gives us another article on the art of

reframing. This is a sophisticated technique used by seasoned EFT'ers to help clients

see issues differently. It is an essential skill if you want to use EFT to its maximum

potential.


24/48

24

As the client recited this story it was obvious from her body language that she was

still accessing the feelings that she had had as the child, her whole face lit up at the

recollection.

This provided useful information as regard to testing the work we were about to do.

The clients face should no longer light up.

Example

Karate Point: So even though aunty looked really glamorous and I decided Smoking

makes you glamorous, I completely and totally love and accept myself.

Karate Point: So even though Smoking made aunty look really glamorous and I

wanted to be like that, I completely and totally accept myself.

Karate Point: So even though I wanted to be look glamorous like aunty smoking, I

completely and totally love and approve of myself.

Eyebrow: Smoking made aunty look glamorous and I wanted to be like aunty.

Side of the Eye: Smoking makes you look glamorous, because aunty looked

glamorous.

Under the Eye: Yes, smoking makes you look glamorous.

Under the nose: Do you watch the show, Coronation Street? Yes, she replied.

Have you seen Bet Lynch in the show? Yes, again she replied.

Chin: Bet Lynch smokes (This is a statement of fact, she even used cigarette

holders. I could see the client acknowledging the point), Yes, Im really glamorous

just like Bet Lynch.

Collar bone: Oh yeah, I love being really glamorous just like Bet

Under the arm: Im really glamorous just like Bet

This caused a complete shift in the clients body language and upon testing, when

asked to think about her aunty smoking, the clients face no longer lit up. She was nolonger associating smoking with being glamorous.

Factors Important to this Reframe

The counter example used MUST be immediately recognisable to the client.

When you use counter-examples who are not immediately recognisable you

lose the impact. With this particular case I checked out with the client whilst

still tapping whether she was familiar with the character. To the client this

would have come across as just a casual conversation.

Extreme counter examples can have the most effect. If I had just used a

character that was neither here nor there regarding being glamorous, it would inall probability not have worked. The fact the counter example was in effect the


25/48

25

anti-glamour was much more powerful. The character of Bet Lynch is brash,

loud mouthed and wears thick make-up and has a very loud sense of style

when it comes to the clothes she wears. For most people this is the type of

image they would avoid at all costs.

Rapport is crucial to the effective delivery of reframes, without sufficient

rapport the client may feel that you are making fun of them, this is counterproductive as it lessens the chance of the reframe landing. Instead the client

would be focussed on their negative emotions.

Calibrating to the clients body language and being able to notice shifts and

changes in it are also important facts. Many people intuitively do this. This is

what helps you know when to deliver the reframe. I know personally when to

deliver it because I sense it intuitively. This comes with practice and taking out

any blocks you have to allowing yourself to be open to your own intuitions.

Bet Lynch was a counter-example that I used to find very useful with many smokers.

Here I have high-lighted how to use her with Smoking makes me glamorous, I have

also used her for, Smoking makes me a rebel. Unfortunately as with all good soap

characters, they move on and Bet is no longer in the show, thus her value as an

instantly recognisable counter-example has dropped dramatically. Since I watch very

little conventional TV, I am a bit lacking on counter-examples, however I watched

Borat (the film) the other day (at my kids insistence), Im sure he will come in very

useful at some point, dont know just where as yet as reframes tend to spring forth in

the moment (For anyone who has watched it, I think that film is going to haunt me for

a long time).

I never plan my reframes however they just spring to mind in the moment. You might

be pleasantly surprised at what reframes might just spring into your mind at just theright time. I hope you have a lot of fun when that happens.

All the best,

Tania

Please note: using the fictional character of Bet Lynch is meant as no reflection on the

wonderful actress who plays Bet.

Thanks to my husband and to Chrissie for proof reading.


26/48

26

An Example of Using Reframes with Addictive Behaviour

Publication Date: EFT Insights Newsletter: 13TH

August 2007

Reframing is the art of conversationally helping people see their issues in a different

way. How you see or think about the issues in your life has a direct effect on your

health and well-being. It is a powerful and fast therapeutic tool in its own right. When

combined with EFT, these two techniques work together beautifully creating fast

results. It can also be a lot of fun to use reframes.

The Reframe highlighted in this article is a very simple one. It is easy to learn and use.

It is one that I have used extensively in my clinics for years and from which I have

had excellent results.

This Reframe deals with bringing the consequences of the clients actions into the

light. I have used a case of alcohol binge drinking to show how it works, however it

can also be easily applied to other similar issues.

Motivational Strategy for Addictive Behaviour

Often when people think about doing things such as drinking, smoking etc they only

see the pleasure in the act and not what happens as a consequence later on.

Thus a smoker thinks of smoking and sees themselves in some location, relaxing.

Associated with this image is a pleasurable feeling. This is part of their motivationalstrategy for having the addictive behaviour (Motivation strategies are the thought

processes we go through in order to create the feelings that drive our behaviour).

The consequences reframe can be extremely effective with this type of case.

Example: Addiction Case

At the beginning of the session the client had mentioned the effect alcohol binge

drinking was having on her life and the fact that she wasnt able to tolerate it as well

as she previously could. She had spoken about being drunk. She had not mentioned

having a hangover, however.

Hi Everyone,

Reframes help clients "see things differently" and often spell the difference between

average and superb EFT sessions. EFT Master Tania Prince from the UK shares her

skills and insights in this area.

Hugs, Gary


27/48

27

This Reframe forms part of a much larger body of work. Prior to its use, we had

worked in depth on some major traumas that had occurred in the clients life. This

part of the work took place after clearing those traumas.

Consequences Reframe

I started this part of the session by accessing how the client motivated themselves to

drink, the question I asked was:

I want you to think whatever you want to think and try and make yourself want a

drink.

The client took a moment: OK. She said.

What did you think?

I thought of being in the garden.

She went on to elaborate on this point.

When I have done the housework and been shopping and been working all day,

drinking is my reward

We set up the EFT as follows:

Karate Point: So even though, I want a drink when I think of being in the garden, its

my reward, I completely and totally accept how I feel

Karate Point: So even though, a drink is my reward for working and cleaning all

day, I completely and totally love and approve of myself

Karate Point: So even though, I want a drink when I think of being in the garden, its

my reward, I completely and totally accept me

Eyebrow: I want a drink, when I think of being in the garden, its my reward

Side of the eye: I want a drink, when I think of being in the garden; its my reward

for working

Under the eye: Having a drink is my reward

Under the nose: Yes, a drink and hangover is my reward

Chin: Is that true about the hangover?

Yes, the client replied

Yep, having a drink and a hangover is my reward

Collar Bone: Yes, having a drink and a hangover is my reward for working all day


28/48

28

As is often the case when using reframes, the clients body language changed

dramatically when the reframe was introduced. We stopped the tapping at this point.

Testing Results

Testing is important when doing therapy. To test in this case I asked the client:

When you think about drinking as a reward, what happens?

Her face screwed up and she said;

My mind just passes that time in the garden and I see myself with a hangover.

This is typical for this reframe. Her original motivational strategy involved a singular

image of her in the garden drinking, enjoying the experience, now she was seeing a

movie that included the consequences of her drinking behaviour, the hangover. There

was no longer a pleasurable feeling associated with the thought of drinking in thegarden.

When asked to think about being in the garden, the client replied that she now saw

herself: doing the gardening and reading. Drink was no longer a part of how she

saw herself when in the garden.

Crucial Points of this Reframe

The reframe is set up at the beginning by simply stating what the clients issue is, as

follows:

So even though, a drink is my reward for working and cleaning all day,..

This is pacing the client, accepting their world as they see it. When you do this you

build rapport. Achieving and maintaining rapport is an important part of therapy and

an important factor in helping achieve results. At the beginning of the EFT Setup, I

continued to pace the client. When you pace a person they are much more likely to

accept the reframe.

When the consequence reframe is introduced, it is done so in a very simple way.

There is no lecturing, no trying to push the issue, just adding the word hangoverinto the reminder phrase.

By asking: Is that true about the hangover?, minimises the possibility that what I

am saying may conflict with the clients view of their world and helps maintain

rapport. It also causes the client to think about having a hangover.

People who drink or smoke often attend therapy and talk about the effect the addictive

substance has on their life. However, they still drink or smoke. The reason for this, at

least in part, is that their motivation strategy for creating the behaviour focuses only

on the pleasure and good feelings and not on the consequences of that behaviour. This

reframe addresses that omission. Basically, it turns the still frame picture of pleasureinto a movie that includes the after-effects.


29/48

29

Reframes are always best when they are not thought out beforehand but rather occur

in the moment. Reframes can be a lot of fun. I hope you enjoy using reframes as much

as I have.

All the best,

Tania

Thank you to Chrissie and my husband for proofing this for me.


30/48

30

Metaphors, Humour and EFT


September 2007

.If we couldnt laugh, we would all go insane..

Jimmy Buffett

Many years ago in a place far, far, far away.

All right lets start again. Many years ago whilst I was still working in the field of

show business, I was touring Finland with my sister and colleague. We had justarrived at our hotel having not long got off the train. It was at this moment my sistersuddenly discovered that the seam in her trousers had split leaving a gaping hole in

the most inappropriate place.

She turned to face the both of us; we were oblivious to her predicament and she said:

Why didnt you tell me? I have travelled half way across Finland with my a*se

hanging out!

Our jaws just hit the floor with the shock of her words, and then we promptly nearly

fell over laughing. I am still laughing to this day even though that was perhaps twentyyears ago. (And incidentally so is my sister, face of an angel, mouth from the gutter).

Humour can be a powerful tool to help us overcome potentially stressful situations.

Humour, reframing (the art of helping clients see their issues in a different way, one

more conducive to their health) and EFT are powerful therapeutic tools in their own

right. When combined they can be even more stunningly effective and fast at getting

results.

There are many ways to reframe. The method I used in this article is one of the more

unusual types in that it basically uses analogy/ metaphor combined with EFT to create

change in the clients thinking.

Hi Everyone,

The artful use of Metaphors and Humor often turns mediocre sessions into

magnificent ones. EFT Master Tania Prince helps us develop these skills by revealing

several pointers from her own experience.

Hugs, Gary


31/48

31

Example of Metaphor, Reframing and EFT

The client attended therapy due to the panic attacks she was experiencing. During

questioning it became evident that her emotions around the death of her father were

part of what was causing this problem.

The clients father had spent the last months of his life in hospital. During this time he

had been highly medicated. Periodically he would come around and notice his wife

and daughter (the client), and upon seeing them he would say, Are you two still

here with disdain in his voice. The client had a lot of emotion over this.

As a way to avoid this happening the mother would watch out for him waking and

would then say, Drop down, they would both then duck down so that he wouldnt

see them. Within moments he would drift back into his drugs induced sleep.

After the client recited the above story to me I decided to err on the side of caution

and use the movie technique. Directly addressing this event could have beenemotionally painful for the client. Asked what she wanted to call this specific event

she said, The drop down movie problem.

As we started to tap on the karate point I said, You know that reminds me of

something that happened in my life, the clients curiosity stirred as she listened

intently to what I was saying.

When I was sixteen years old a guy of about 90 took a fancy to me and he would call

around to our house with flowers for me. Whenever my mother spotted him coming

down the pathway to the house she would shout, drop down! We would all drop to the

floor and crawl behind the furniture laughing our heads off.

At that point I instantly went into the movie technique without stopping for breath.

Karate Point: So even though I have the drop down movie problem, I completely and


In the split second it took for the client to process what I had said she burst into

hysterical laughter whilst we continued to tap.

Karate Point: So even though I have the drop down movie problem, I completely andtotally love and approve of myself.

Karate Point: So even though I have the drop down movie problem, I completely and


Eyebrow: Drop down movie problem

Side of the eye: Drop down movie problem

Under the eye: Drop down movie problem

We gave up the tapping at this point. When her laughter subsided I asked her.


32/48

32

And when you think about the drop down movie problem, what happens?

She laughed.

It just seems funny now.

Over a year later when asked the same question she replied that the event seemed,

like a comedy, she still found it highly amusing although it was evident she was

watching it as if she was a spectator to the event rather than one who was present at

the time. This way of thinking about an event is commonly connected to having

resolved it. Dissociated in the visual memory rather than looking at it through your

own eyes as if still there.

Breakdown of Analogy/ Metaphors Reframe?

This type of reframe is dependent on identifying and using the commonalities

between the clients story and the one you tell.

In this particular case, the clients story involves three characters, two women,

(mother and daughter) and a man.

The story I used contains the same type of characters.

The clients story has the element of the mother shouting, Drop down and the

mother/ daughter characters ducking down to the floor. Again my story has the same

element.

In both stories this drop down behaviour is caused by the man coming around and

the female characters not wanting to be seen by him.

Here is where the commonality stops. Whereas the clients story has a sad association,

my story is associated with humour.

The metaphor effectively let the client see her own issue in a new way, one which

previously she had been unable to see. This effectively broke the association between

sadness and the event and at the same time connected humour to it.

Why do metaphors work so powerfully?

Metaphors are gentle, subtle techniques since they do not directly address the

issue.

They do not try to force the person to take on board the new perspective.

They bypass the parts of the mind that normally resist taking on board newinformation.

Stories engage both the conscious (linear, sequential part of the mind) and the

unconscious (emotional and symbolic part of the mind).

EFT makes the mind even more receptive to accepting the metaphor.


33/48

33

How to Develop the Ability to Use Metaphor

Formulating metaphors requires the ability to think laterally. Technically the question

to ask yourself in order to be able to create instant metaphors is, what is another

example of, in this case, dropping down.

However the easiest way to develop this skill is by tapping out your blocks. One

method to identifying those blocks is to listen to the internal dialogue whilst reading

the part of this article on the reframe. What did your mind say? Was it, I cant do

that etc. These are the thoughts you need to tap out. Being good at delivering

reframes and metaphors is dependent upon trusting yourself and just going with the

ideas that pop into your mind without critiquing them. Anything that gets in the way

of doing that is a block so tap it out.

Once you have done that you might just be pleasantly surprised at just how easy it can

be.

Tania A Prince EFT Master

All stories and cases used in this article were done so with the permission of the

people involved.


34/48

34

Using EFT for Bereavement


July 2007

Introduction

The loss of a loved one can result in extreme emotional distress. In some cases this

distress can go on for years. EFT is a fantastic tool that can help people deal with

these difficult emotions and reach a place where they can be at peace within

themselves.

The following article deals with the basic strategy that I use with bereavement cases.

To help to highlight the process, I have used a case I worked on where the client

developed panic attacks shortly after her father died.

Throughout this article I mention the use of reframes. In order to keep this particular

article simple to read I did not include detailed information on the reframes. I will

however be featuring them in a future article expanding on my earlier articles on EFT

and reframing.

Dealing with Bereavement

In my practice I have dealt with bereavement issues many times. I use a simple three

step strategy

1. Deal with potential blocks and explain the process

2. Deal with the trauma and emotions around the bereavement

3. Tap on the positive

1. Deal with Potential Blocks and Explain the Process

Rapport is crucial to successful therapy. Understanding the clients belief systems and

working within them helps maintain rapport. Therefore the first thing I always do

when dealing with a bereavement issue is check the clients belief structure. When I

know what their beliefs are, I work with them, even if they are different from mine.

Hi Everyone,

Unfortunately, grief (bereavement) shows up in just about everyone's life. A thank

you to EFT Master Tania Prince (from the UK) for sharing her ways of handling it.

Hugs, Gary


35/48

35

Peoples beliefs around dying can differ immensely. Although many clients have

some form of spiritual beliefs I have also worked with clients whose beliefs are:

death is it, we no longer exist in any form. Knowing this at the onset of the session

means that I am less likely to inadvertently say things that conflict with their belief

system and thus possibly damage the rapport. It also provides me with useful

information if I use reframes with EFT. (Reframes are commonly used in therapy.They are a linguistic method of helping people shift their perception around issues.

Combined with EFT they are very powerful.)

A common block I have come across is that people can be uncomfortable at the

thought of letting go of their emotions around the loss. Some fear that losing their

negative emotions means that they will no longer think about the person etc as if they

will completely lose the person. However my experience of using EFT with this issue

is that all they lose are the negative feelings. What naturally occurs as a consequence

of this is that they naturally and automatically begin to remember the good times and

the good memories of that person and experience good feelings as well. Sharing this

information with clients prior to tapping allows the sessions to go much moresmoothly.

In order to do this I ask the client to tap on the karate point. Then whilst they are

tapping we just talk in a conversational manner and discuss what happens during this

process. After I have talked this through with the client I always ask permission to

proceed by saying, Is that OK with you?

The reason why I started to incorporate the above step into my bereavement sessions

is that I noticed clients from time to time would begin to look uncomfortable when

they began to tap on the trauma around the bereavement. They were shocked and

frightened that it was working. I no longer have this reaction.

2. Dealing With The Trauma Of The Bereavement

When I work with bereavement issues I always take the negative emotions down to

zero intensity. Using EFT it is possible to do this even with the most horrific

memories. I clear all the negative emotions and traumas related to the death. The

volume of work required can differ dramatically from client to client.

One of the traumas in the case I am using in this article was the hospital visits.

Commonly the father would wake up, highly medicated and would say:

Youre not still here, are you?

This was highly traumatic for both the client and her mother. So, each time he began

to rouse the mother would say:

Drop down.

Both mother and daughter would duck to avoid being seen. We used the EFT Movie

technique combined with reframing to deal with this event. It cleared within seconds

of beginning to tap. Clearing the one specific event resulted in all the other relatedevents where they had ducked down, clearing as well.


36/48

36

I also cleared the moment of realisation that the person had died. In this case the client

called it the yellow movie problem.

Other traumas included feeling that her father did not love her because she had found

out that he had attempted suicide several times during his life. Again I used reframing

and EFT to clear this.

3. Tapping on the Positive

Although I do not use this stage with all clients, for many I have found this part of the

therapy to be very beneficial.

The client in this case had strong spiritual beliefs. Her beliefs were that we went on in

some form after death. So I asked her whilst we were tapping on the karate point:

In that case, where would your father be now?

She looked over at the chair in the office and said:

Hed be in that chair listening to us.

In her minds eye she saw him wearing his green jacket with his hand cupped to his

ear. (She still remembers fondly and vividly how she visualised her father on this day

even months later)

And is he happy?

She said he was highly amused and interested by what we were doing.

Although I didnt use the following question in this case I have in others where it has

seemed appropriate;

And would you meet up again with him at some point?

Oh yes, is generally the answer I receive. Many clients seem to gain a lot of benefit

from this discussion.

Testing

After we completed these steps, I asked the client:

When you think of your father what happens?

By phrasing the question in this way I am giving the client permission to say whatever

occurs and not directing them to give me a positive answer.

Automatically (without any effort) the clients face lit up as a positive memory

popped into her mind. The client should not have to try to think positively, if they do

have to use effort there is still more work to do.


37/48

37

The client reported that after we did this in the therapy session she never again felt the

sad feelings that she had experienced after her fathers death. In fact she was able to

remember her father fondly with a smile on her face.

After EFT Therapy

This interview took place several months after completion of the therapy.

When asked about her father, the client said:

I can look at my fathers photo and feel good. She went on to say, when I think of

him, I remember him coming up the stairs, looking happy.

I can go to the grave and not feel sad at all. In fact I clean down the headstone and

take flowers and say, here you go Dad, and I even clean the next headstone

because Dad was always making comments when he was alive about the next door

neighbours not looking after the place.

When asked whether she felt her father loved her, she automatically said, of course

he does.

Written by Tania A Prince, EFT Master

I would like to thank the client who helped me write this article. She wanted to share

her story and is very passionate about EFT. She has since gone on to become an EFT

Therapist.


38/48

38

Using Humor with EFT


June 2006

Most forms of therapy can be extremely stressful for the client. In fact it is not

uncommon for clients to spend at least some time during the session in tears or

distress.

EFT, in contrast to most therapies, has the potential to achieve results without the

client having to experience distress. In EFT there are many ways to make therapy less

stressful, such as, The Tearless Trauma Technique, Sneaking up on the Problem and

Chasing the Pain. Another tool EFT therapists can use is humour. Humour is

something that can work extremely well combined with EFT.

The Benefits Of Using Humour In Therapy

Humour can not only can lighten an emotionally intense experience for the client, but

it can also help to create fast and painless change.

Humour can also make the therapy process less stressful for the therapist and help to

avoid burn out.

When a person laughs their whole body is flooded with natural body chemicals which

are conducive to health and well-being. Basically laughter is healing.

Ways In Which Humour Can Be Utilised During A Session

There are several different ways in which humour can be used during an EFT session,

these are:

1. As a means to test the work you have done.

2. As a means to reframe, give a different meaning or perspective to the clients

previously unhelpful experience.

Hi Everyone,

Humor has many uses in the healing process but its delivery can sometimes be

delicate. Fortunately, EFT Master Tania Prince gives us many tips and insights for

including this useful tool. Her delightful British flair (and spelling) are evident

throughout her article.

Hugs, Gary


39/48

39

3. As a way to lighten the emotional intensity of the therapy situation and as a tool in

and of itself to help collapse the negative un-resourceful state.

The body cannot hold two opposing states simultaneously. For example, a person

cannot experience the feeling of finding something extremely funny and the feeling of

something being hurtful in the body at the same time. If the two opposing feelingswere to be fired off simultaneously the feelings would collapse into each other and

you are left with a different feeling. This phenomena is used in NLP (Neuro-

Linguistic Programming) and is called collapsing anchors.

In EFT humour can be used in this capacity to help collapse the clients un-

resourceful state.

(A state refers to mind/ body/ mood/ emotions occurring at any one moment in time).

Feedback Models and Humour

I think it is important when using a form of therapy that might conflict with the

clients expectations that you establish very early on during the session that you are

focussed on achieving results.

Thus when I use humour, I also set up feedback mechanisms that show the results are

occurring. I use the 0-10 intensity scale before and after each round of tapping. So

even though the client may have been laughing through the tapping sequence, we test

and firmly establish that it has indeed eliminated the original negative feeling or

belief.

I may even ask the client to try to get the negative feeling back. After they have tried

and failed, I may even say, You havent tried hard enough, try again. Of course, I

say this in such a way that it maintains rapport between myself and the client.

Case Utilising Humour

Below is a case in which I used humour to help a client who to deal with a weight

issue. At the time of attending my clinic she was compulsively over eating every

evening and was several stone (1 stone = 14 pounds) over her normal healthy weight.

Although this session highlights the use of humour, this is only one of a multitude oftechniques utilised during the session.

From almost the minute the client came in to the clinic we connected; the rapport was

instant. It was also very obvious to me that the client had a very well developed sense

of humour.

Reframing from Deprivation to Increasing Choice

One of the common things that occurs in an issue such as weight management is that

the client often feels deprived; as if they cant have something. A lot of people find

that the moment they are told or feel they cant have something is when they seem to


40/48

40

want it even more. Shifting this can be a powerful intervention that can help the client

achieve their goal.

Firstly I explained to the client that it would be good for her to no longer feel deprived

at the thought of not being able to have these foods anymore and that we were not

taking away her choice about whether she could have them. The objective of what wewere doing was to give her a choice because at present she was almost non stop

compulsively eating in the evenings.

We were looking to increase her choice so that she could now decide whether she

wanted to eat the food or not. Also that it wasnt that she couldnt have the food, it

was that she would be choosing that she didnt want the food.

Humour in the form of Slips of the Tongue

After getting a 0-10 intensity level on the feeling of being deprived at not being able

to eat these kinds of foods any more, we set up the EFT statement as follows.

Even though I feel deprived of the pleasure of eating my favourite foods, I

completely ..

After establishing the set up statement, I clarified with the client that the word was in

fact deprived and not depraved. The client stated to smile and confirmed it was

deprived.

Slips of the tongue are common comic phenomena, one which can be used for great

effect especially if rapport is excellent. For example, accidentally, slipping in the

word depraved and innocently asking is that right. In my experience this works best

when you as a therapist have an internal feeling of finding it funny yourself

(congruently). When you are in rapport with your client you can lead your client to

where you are, and thus help them see the humour in what you are saying.

After doing this the first time, fate took over and intermittently the word depraved

slipped out. Each time it did the client doubled over in hysterical laughter, in fact both

of us nearly rolled off our seats. Of course after the first time of linking the word

depraved to laughter, each subsequent time I used the word I was merely retriggering

off the past association I created by doing it the first time, a phenomena in NLP called

anchoring. Asked at the end of the round whether she could still access the feeling ofbeing deprived, she said she couldnt.

Tapping out the Cravings

Prior to the session I had asked the client to bring with her some of the foods that she

was compulsively eating. She brought a meat pie and a chocolate bar.

Tapping out the cravings was a very simple procedure with this client. I simply

directed her attention to each piece of food that she had brought, tossed it under her

nose and asked her how much she wanted to eat it right now. Within two rounds of

EFT, the 0-10 intensity fell to zero on both foods.


41/48

41

Demonstrations such as this are very powerful convincers that EFT is effective.

Helping the client notice the change in perception of taste/smell, which is very easy to

demonstrate, immediately creates a sense of expectation for the session to be

successful.

Dealing with the Underlying Drivers: Guilt and Bereavement

Further into the session we decided to work on the underlying drivers fuelling the

addictive eating pattern. The biggest was the death of her father, over which she had

guilt feelings because she had been out of the country at the time. In my experience

irrational feelings of guilt quite often occur in these circumstances. It is as if the

person feels they should have been there, and yet only in hindsight would they have

known the person was going to die.

After using sneaking up on the problem methods and thus taking the edge off the

issue, I decided to use the Movie Technique as the client was near to tears even at the

thought.

I asked her to give a title to the moment when the first large emotion had occurred. I

asked her if it was a movie of someone elses life, what would the title be?

As can often happen, she said,- Oh, Im not good at doing stuff like that,

She seemed to be having difficulty coming up with a title.

Although her answer indicated a limiting belief about her own abilities to create

movie titles, I chose not to work on that simply because I did not feel it was relevant

to the issue we were dealing with, but merely a side issue. To bypass it I said,

If the movie was a colour, what would it be?

Well, blue, was her immediate answer.

Knowing what came next, as I had chosen to use the movie technique set up, I

immediately said, Interesting choice of colour, in a tone of voice indicating that I

had found something interesting, although I did not reveal what that was to the client.

Without saying anything more about what I found interesting, I started the EFT

statement,

So even though I have the blue movie problem

Effectively by saying what I did prior to doing the set up, I helped the client develop

an internal state of curiosity. Whilst in this mental state her mind was seeking out

what it was that I found curious. As soon as she heard me say, Blue movie problem,

her mind made the connection instantly. She burst into spontaneous laughter.

Although it is possible that she may have made the connection without my words

drawing her attention to it, my words made it easier for her to connect more quickly.


42/48

42

Since she was already tuned into the issue around feeling guilty about her fathers

death, she now had basically two opposing states occurring. As earlier stated, the

body cannot have two opposing states at the same time. They cancel each other out

and all that usually remains is whichever of the two states has the greater emotion.

Immediately the client fell into hysterical laughter and she even said her dad wouldsee the humour of that. Within a round of EFT the emotion around the specific event

relating to the death of her father, including the guilt feeling was gone. In fact, it went

within the first few points of tapping, except we were both too busy laughing to check

until the round finished.

Since the title, blue, had come from the client, I had merely utilised it to help

facilitate change.

No Go Areas

There is a fine line between humour which can be appropriate and effective and thatwhich breaks the mood and creates adverse reactions in the client, such as feeling you

are making fun of them or you have gone too far and are touching on a subject which

isnt funny. As we moved further into this session we approached a moment when the

situation could very easily have triggered a negative reaction.

Talking further about her father, the client mentioned that he had had a favourite piece

of music. The moment she mentioned this, it triggered a feeling of missing him.

Going into more detail the client mentioned a specific event in which he played this

music and it was obvious she had some quite intense/sad feelings around this moment.

I asked her where she felt that feeling and she said it was in her chest.

Automatically I set the EFT up as Even though, I have Dad feeling my chest, I

completely and totally love and approve of myself.

The instant the words were out of my mouth my mind made the connection. Danger

zone, a slip of the tongue and we would be in very dodgy territory.

An inner voice said to me, dont go there.

Still, the seeds had already been laid, the client took one look at me in the middle ofthe round, smirked and said, Dont go there and laughed her head off as both of us

struggled to remain precise with what we were saying.

Both of us burst into laughter, as we tapped through the rest of the round, making sure

we got the reminder phrase precise, Dad feeling IN my chest.

The feeling of missing him was gone. In fact positive memories were popping into

her mind at the thought of her Dad.


43/48

43

Follow Up Session: Feedback

The follow-up sessio

articles on eft

Documents