at peace with god
TRANSCRIPT
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At
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AtPeace
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by Mike Rigby
At
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Copyright 2009 by Mike Rigby
All Rights Reserved
Any part of this book may be reprinted or published
in part or in whole so long as the user reprints the text
exactly as it is written and is not republishing
or copying this material to get financial gain.
ISBN: 1-891265-11-3First Printing 2009
Distributed By:
MAP
511 E. 1250 S.
Payson, Utah 84651
801-224-6002
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Acknowledgments
I wish to express a very special thanks to three people
in my life. Two very dear friends, Terry Obrien and Valerie
Sauve, whose hard work, critique and sometimes kick in
the pants has finally put this story to print. Your ability
to polish my rough exterior into something palatable willsurely not go unnoticed by the reader.
And what can I say about my overly supportive wife
Valerie? Her grasp of spiritual principles and love for others
has taught me one great lesson: Be yourself, but be your
best self. I love you! Thanks.
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Contents
Chapter 1 ~ Reflections 1
Chapter 2 ~ Night Visitor 15
Chapter 3 ~ My Grandfather 25
Chapter 4 ~ Destruction Dream and
Learning to Listen 37
Chapter 5 ~ Christ in My Life 45
Chapter 6 ~ Teachings of Christ 59
Chapter 7 ~ Christs Life 65
Chapter 8 ~ Earthquake Predictions 75
Chapter 9 ~ Receiving Records 81
Chapter 10 ~ Publishing Sacred Scripture 87
Chapter 11 ~ Disciplinary Action 99
Chapter 12 ~ Dream About My Wife 109Chapter 13 ~ The Garments 113
Chapter 14 ~ Seminary Teacher 119
Chapter 15 ~ Blessings 123
Chapter 16 ~ Tranquility 131
Chapter 17 ~ Speaking in Tongues 135
Chapter 18 ~ Exercises in Faith 141
Chapter 19 ~ Jenny 149
Chapter 20 ~ Conclusions & Summary 157
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And this is life eternal, that
they might know thee the only true
God, and Jesus Christ, whom thou hast sent.
~ John 17:3
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What you are about to read is my spiritual journey to
learn about myself and to meet and/or experience God.
Your path will probably be totally different. Our spiri-
tual advancements seem to be as varied as our personali-
ties, and only a Divine Source seems to know the needs
of each individual. It is my hope that in the pages of thistext you will be able to relate to principles or personality
traits of Godliness perhaps even character attributes of
deity that can be woven into the fabric of your own life.
Hopefully by learning of someone elses struggle you may
be able to comprehend God in a simple way which will
make focusing on God, or recognizing the God within,easier for you. If along that path you gain information
which helps you to be God like, then my life will have
fulfillment and the purpose for this writing will have been
accomplished. MLR
Forword
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1
CHAPTER 1
Reflections
The sun beat down on our car as my wife and I sat
waiting for the next few minutes to tick by. We were hoping
to not be too early to my church Disciplinary Council. It
was the 19th of July 1994, and even though it was early
evening, the sun still hung high in the sky above the moun-tain town of Midway, Utah, which we called home.
As we walked to the foyer in the church, I could feel
the presence of a host of relatives who had long since
journeyed beyond this life. Only two years earlier I would
have dismissed such things as a figment of my imagina-
tion. But now it had become a reality. A reality I could not
free myself from, nor did I have a desire to. Life, and my
outlook on it, had changed so drastically, I was sure that to
the rest of the world I had become a kook.
As our meeting time approached we were directed to
a small lobby, only to find our wait there was longer than
expected. This gave me time to reflect on the past year and
a half of my life.So much had changed. My attitudes had shifted so
greatly. I was not the person that I used to be, and yet I
could not deny all that had happened to me, nor would I
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want tofor it would be to deny that I existed, or that life
itself was real, and we were sitting in that lobby that very
moment.How could I convey the feelings and the experiences
of the past year and a half to those who had never had
them? Would I have believed these things myself back then
if someone had come to me with the same tales? Perhaps
not. In that sense I was no different than my peers. How
could I hold these men to any higher standard? My feelingwas I could not.
I was about to face fifteen men who had been called
together to decide whether or not I had become a threat to
the organization we all loved so dearly. If you have never
been a member of a church or social group you will have
a hard time relating to what was about to happen. If you
have, then to some degree you should understand.
I had worked side by side with these men and their
wives for the past ten years. (There was only one person
there with whom I was not well acquainted.) In my past
church experience I had sat on a High Council just like
this one. I knew exactly how the protocol went, for I had
been there dozens of times.As an active member of the LDS faith your whole life
revolves around church activity. There are programs for the
youth of all ages, and groups set up involving the women in
social and charitable service. As a young man I was expected
to go on a two year mission. It was an experience that I
looked forward to and then enjoyed to its fullest.This church had become a part of me. A part I loved
and a life which gave me great satisfaction. It was who I
was; it was a major element of my identity.
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Never in my wildest dreams had I considered the
possibility of finding myself at odds with the leadership.
That was so far from my way of thinking it just hadntcrossed my mind.
LDS Church Councils are presided over and called
together by the local Stake President. He is a lay minister that
oversees five to ten wards which are each the equivalent of
a parish or small congregation. His decision is normally the
final word over the roughly 2000 people which he serves.The council members he calls to work with him are made
up of men only, who help administer policies.
The decision of these men, and especially the Stake
President, could change the course of my life, and I knew
it. For myself, I felt that I could handle it; but what about
my five children and my wife?
Their lives would change as well, and they were
innocent bystanders, with no way to alter the course. My
concern for them far outweighed my regard for myself.
Such were my initial thoughts on that hot July evening.
As we sat holding hands I could feel my wifes support,
and I wondered if even she could handle the opening of
the next door. Thought after thought raced through mymind and I went back to my first recollections of how I
had come to be where I was.
In the year 1954 my father was drafted into the
American Army. As fate would have it he didnt get sent
to Korea but was given a two year stint in Germany.
Being married at the time, he took my mother with him,and I was born abroad in 1955 the first child and only
son in what would eventually be a family of six. When
the military service ended, we came home to Utah where
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I spent the next 17 years in a small suburb of Salt Lake
City, called Holiday.
I grew up under fairly normal circumstances, despitethe fact that I was being raised in a community that was,
and still is, predominantly Mormon. In my mind it had
only a positive effect, giving my personality what I needed
to become a normal upstanding citizen in society.
I was taught to love God, and to seek to serve him with
all of my heart. I learned respect for the laws of the landand the rights of others. My parents were quite religious,
but I never felt forced to be as they were, nor to act in what
others would call a religious manner. I dont remember
being forced to go to church it was just expected.
As I look back on it now, it was the feeling of the
warmth of the Spirit that kept me going, not the sense
of duty to God, or the fear of my parents, or of some
eternal damnation.
Spiritual experiences were not shunned in our house-
hold; but also were not shared much outside of our home
environment. While I was in the fourth grade, a boy
down the street got hit by lightning and killed. Because
I was two years younger than Scott (the boy killed), andI was in school, I was not permitted to go to the funeral.
I remember my father coming home and telling me that
while he was waiting for the funeral to start, he saw Scott
come into the church with his deceased grandfather,
then walk to the open casket, look inside, and walk away,
vanishing through the church wall. This experience wasrarely talked about with others outside of our family, but
we were all aware of what my father had seen. It was just
something that happened, and we as a family all believed
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it, for I never knew my father to lie.
My mother, too, was prone to spiritual experiences,
but was much more quiet about them than my father,feeling that these were for her personal growth alone and
not to be shared. Still the very fact that she was going
through encounters of a spiritual nature herself left me
knowing that these things were real and not to be feared.
Just after my birth, my mother hemorrhaged and had what
we would call today a near death experience or NDE.From that time forth she never feared death, but seemed
to feel a sense of duty toward a lifes mission that would
have an influence on the lives of thousands of people. I
believe that she still has never wavered in trying to accom-
plish what she sees as her own personal responsibility to
the human family.
As a young boy I felt much closer to my mother than
to my father. She was my protector and playmate. I shall
never forget the hours that she held me as a young child
and successfully protected me from the negative inf luences
of the world around me. It wasnt until about age ten or
twelve that I noticed I was starting to attach to my father,
and move away from my mothers influence.Dad is the outgoing type and we found a mutual
interest in camping and outdoor activities. His interest in
the Boy Scout program always kept young men around
the house and he seemed to have a profound inf luence on
their lives. To this day they still come back on occasion
and thank him for the time that he spent in their lives.I was raised with the same ideals as others in our
community, but as I began to grow and mature, I felt that
my relationship with God was not what I wanted it to be.
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There was always something that seemed to be missing, a
void, if you like regarding my understanding of God.
I read in books of the closeness others felt with Deityand I desired to have these same intimate spiritual experi-
ences for myself. I had a great desire to know and experi-
ence spirituality with a longing that could not be quenched.
Some have a desire to excel in sports or to achieve finan-
cially, but my drive was to know God and feel the warmth
of His spirit continually.In the scriptures I came across people like Moses who
met God face-to-face, and I longed to have that experience
of closeness or communication in my own life. The best
way I can describe it is to say that I hungered and thirsted
to not only see God, but to be one with him as Jesus had
said he was one with His Father. I believed deeply that the
experiences of others, such as Christ, were true and that
it was possible for me to do the same.
I also knew that it would take a commitment on my part,
but at the time I had little understanding or comprehension
of how complete that commitment had to be. I had no idea
of how far reaching the effects of getting close to God would
be for me, or how difficult it would be on others to allow meto go there.
At the age of nineteen, I was called to serve a mission
for the LDS Church in England. This was one of the
greatest experiences of my life. Since then I have always
felt that it doesnt matter who you are or what religious
understanding you have, if you are able to dedicate yourlife to serving others and to serving God, you are going to
grow and have many spiritual experiences. And so it was
true of my experiences in England. There I learned to love
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people who were a lot less fortunate than I, and to give of
myself when I felt there was nothing left to give to go the
extra mile and make a difference in peoples lives.Miracles happened weekly where I witnessed healings
and blessings in the lives of others. I was miraculously
preserved from harm many times and often given the gift
to look into peoples lives or hearts and see what was trou-
bling them.
The hardest transition of my life was to come homeand get back into the rat race of earning a living. I can
remember praying when I got home and saying, Lord if
you are going to take my life, do it now, for I feel that I am
at the peek of my spiritual growth. At that point I could
not see myself ever again living on the spiritual level that I
had found as a missionary.
For the first 38 years of my life I tried to make the
spiritual experiences happen. This I did by trying to live
every law or rule that I had learned in church and in the
scriptures. Although at times I experienced a form of
Godliness or spirituality, I still did not feel I was having
encounters that brought me to a greater closeness or
oneness with God.It seemed as though I was stuck on a spiritual plateau,
and that the people around me were at the same point.
I could see that almost all of the individuals I met were
content where they were spiritually, and had little desire
to progress, or move forward into what they considered
the unknown. It is probably complacency or the easinessof drifting along that lets people get stuck in the limita-
tions of a just go to church rut. I have always been
surprised at how content people are to stay in their daily
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and weekly routines with little desire to find out more
about the unknown.
After a long struggle with what seemed to be minimalresults, I began to get a bit discouraged with the whole
process of growing spiritually. This was probably due in
part to the fact that I kept reading in the scriptures about
spiritual gifts that the righteous possessed, and I didnt
seem to have or be experiencing any especially not on
a daily basis. Even my closest friends didnt display any ofthese gifts in their lives.
The church that I grew up in claimed to have the
Gifts of the Spirit, but I rarely saw them manifest by
the church members as displayed by the early apostles of
Christ, or members of the early Christian Church. With
greater and deeper discouragement I found myself turning
to God more often in prayer and pleading for guidance and
help. I find it hard to describe what this feeling of frustra-
tion is like. Its not that I was totally unhappy, but rather
that my life was lacking purpose. I wasnt making progress.
Surely there had to be more to life than the everyday go
to work and come home, do my church assignments, and
love my family.My foundation, or that which I had trusted in (which I
realized later was mostly based on the precepts or concepts
of men) was coming up short. I began to doubt that anyone
was having the spiritual experiences witnessed by the early
Christian Saints. Through my church teachings I was
taught that to seek and know God was not wrong. In fact itwas generally encouraged, but I couldnt find anyone that
would say they had met the Lord.
Trust and truth were words I began to dissect in my
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mind. Was truth something that I could actually put my
finger on, and was it the same for everyone? Or was it
something that was relative to me and the reality I wascreating through my actions and thoughts? If the latter
were true, then how could I even trust the written word
which translators may have exaggerated and even fabri-
cated to some degree? And what about the interpretation
that each of us makes when we see or read something?
Finding the true intent of the individual putting forth theirviewpoint on something was difficult and at best subject
to many angles or levels of understanding.
I felt so confused about the whole matter that I really
wanted to back off; to somehow walk away and start all
over from scratch. If I had not witnessed some spiritual
experiences, I probably would have given up on the whole
thing, or tried to ignore the problem out of existence. Still,
deep within me was a longing for the warmth and love
that the Spirit brings. I kept going back to that two-year
period of my mission when I had dedicated myself to the
service of God. It was the only time when I had really
found continual joy. This caused me to reflect on what
made this time so special. What brought the joy I had feltthen and why was I not feeling it now? I am sure some will
argue that I was delivering the truth to a world that didnt
have it and God was blessing me with a peace that kept me
content in this endeavor; but inside I knew there was more.
Something was different then from now and it went much
deeper. Somehow I had to put my finger on it.As I wrestled with this problem, I noticed that my
prayers started to change. They began to feel more sincere
and I found myself pleading with the Lord to show me
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what I was doing wrong, and help me see what was stop-
ping my spiritual progression. While praying, I often said,
Lord take away from me everything that is keeping mefrom seeing you although I felt that if taken literally,
this statement could mean that I may give up all that I
thought was of value in my life.
Still the desire to penetrate the barrier continued to
push me forward and drive me to some sort of peace with
regard to the matter. Through all the confusion I somehowknew deep within my heart that God would somehow
open things up for me.
I remember one time as I was pouring my heart out
to God for help, I suddenly stopped in mid sentence and
began to cry. I felt overcome with sadness that somehow I
was letting God down, that I was failing the tests or experi-
ences of this physical existence. At that moment all I could
see of my life was the failings and lack of progress. It was
as if in some way I had been rejected by my Maker and that
my offering to God was not complete enough. But, what
else could I give? Had I not been willing to put all I had on
the altar? As I wept, I pleaded for an answer. Precisely how
much time elapsed I am not sure for I felt caught up in theanguish of failure.
As I continued to sink into my own manufactured
hell, I felt a burning or tingling sensation gradually cover
my whole being, and a great joy welled up in my chest.
It was as if a blanket of peace had slowly been rolled
over me and I was encompassed by some power I hadfelt many times before, in brief moments. But now it was
stronger and more focused as it moved through me and
enveloped my emotions. Instantly I felt my mind clear,
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and a serene calm washed over me. It was wonderful.
At this point I heard no voice, nor saw any heavenly
being, but I had a comforting reassurance and confidencethat all things were in Gods hands, and would work out
for my best good. I knew that God was aware of me and
that in time the answers would come.
This experience helped me see that I was not forgotten,
that none of us are forgotten, nor can we be.
My direction now took a bit of a change, and I soughtto have this warm reassuring feeling guide me in all I did.
As I faced the cares of everyday life, I tried to hold onto
the feeling of comfort whenever I noticed it starting to
leave. With practice you can become very aware of when
the Spirit of God or the feeling of Love is with you and
when it is not. Or maybe I should say, when it is strong
and when it is not. This practice also reveals the things
that drive the spirit away in your life. I noticed that I was
becoming aware of everything that was going on around
me, not from what I saw, or the physical experiences but
by how I felt.
I now found that if I would ask in prayer concerning
a decision I had just made, or one I was about to make,I would often get that feeling of comfort or a Witness
of the Spirit (as it was known in my church), to help me
know which direction to go. If I got a Spiritual Witness,
then I would stick with the decision. If I didnt get the
Witness, then I would drop it, or forget what I had asked
about. This led me to trust the Love feeling or Spirit witheverything I did.
I also found that many people began to think I was
crazy, and radical. Business friends started to treat me a
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little differently when I shared what was happening in my
life. I was no longer asked to participate in company gath-
erings, and clients began to act strictly business like.Still I persisted in following the Spirit, for it kept
bringing peace to my mind and heart even though at times
I must admit, I too wondered if I was losing it.
By the warmth of the Spirit I was directed to many
books that helped me learn the deeper meanings of life,
and I began to see that if I wanted to have the experiencesI had read about others having, I would have to make a
full time commitment to doing Gods will. This did not
mean that I would have to become a monk or preacher or
priest, but rather I would put my desire for godliness ahead
of all else.
By now I could look back at my life and see that all
the highs and lows were there for a reason. They each
had purpose and in some way, however small it may have
seemed at the time, I was growing from each peak and
each valley. I tried to program my mind so that I looked
at all things as for my good; to see everything as being in
divine order and for the good of not just myself but all
those I influenced. This helped me to plow through therough things the Spirit directed me to do and still keep a
positive attitude.
I began looking for the good in everyone and not
caring what the world thought. It was coming down to
me and the Spirit, and let the rest of the world worry
about their own relationship with God. In other words, Icouldnt let what others thought dictate what I believed or
how I acted upon that belief.
There is a very shocking reality that hits you when you
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sincerely try to not let others influence what you say, do, or
think about. For me what came home hardest was just how
much I was being affected by those around me. It seemedthat 98% of what I was doing in life was the direct result
of my contact with others. And this contact meant I was
behaving a certain way because I was pre programmed by
my environment to act that way. Not realizing it, I really
thought that was how people wanted me to act, or that I
would gain the acceptance of others by displaying char-acter traits they approved. It seems a bit silly now but at
the time I became very aware of the reasons behind my
everyday actions. I dissected my behavior and the thoughts
I was thinking to justify that behavior. When you do this
sincerely, your personality will change very rapidly.
The scripture Praise God in All Things took on
new meaning, and I asked myself which part of my experi-
ences was not included in all things. I came to the conclu-
sion that there was not one solitary thing happening to me
for which I could not thank God and give Him the glory.
Merlin Crowthers book From Prison to Praise was a big
help. When you can look at the mistakes of your own life
with true objectivity as a third person, you become moreforgiving of others, and then you can see the purpose in
what is happening in your own life. The divinity of it all
becomes overwhelming.
At this point my faith and understanding of God
were beginning to grow, even if still small. A seed was
there that I began to water and nurture in a most tenderway. Rather than rely on my own ability to get through
problems, I began to put the burden on God and let him
take care of them.
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Some people assumed I had a dont care attitude,
because when I was pushed into a corner or felt stuck
solving a problem, I would back away and place it at Godsfeet. As I did this I noticed that it always came out in my
best interest and long term growth, even if I didnt see it
at the moment. But in time as I looked back, I could see
the hand of Divine intervention in every part. Thank you
Lord and thank you Father were words I could not say
often enough. However I began to choke on those wordsas the reality of my excommunication court came rushing
back to the forefront of my thinking.
I need your help Father; I so need your help. My
nervousness at that moment was a dead give away that I
had put a lot of value on my church membership.
Only by sinking back into my spiritual experiences
could I relax and leave the present turmoil.
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Night Visitor
CHAPTER 2
Along my spiritual path, I had been asking God for
any enlightenment extant on the subject of life after death.
I often wondered why, if this life is to prepare us for the
next, are people so fearful of information about that next
life? If you set out to study all you can about the after lifeyou will be amazed at how much information is published
on the subject and how well that information dovetails
together. The broad picture is vast and far reaching. Even
with all you can find you will only be learning the smallest
part of the vastness of Gods creations.
I ran across a book written by Betty Eddie, called
Embraced by the Light. The book had only been out two
months when a friend gave me a copy to read and I stayed
up until three oclock in the morning devouring its message.
The book went on to be a best seller and I was able to chat
with Betty at one time about her encounter. She was as sweet
and loving on the phone as I had pictured she would be from
her writings.More than anything else this book let me feel through
her experience the love of God and how close and personal
He is. I realized that we are the ones that drive God away
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and that there is nothing that I can do that will stop Him
from loving me. My desire then became even greater to
meet this Jesus, as his apostles had done after His deathand resurrection.
As I shared this book with others, I came across a
photocopy of Robert Bensons book, Life in the World
Unseen as channeled through Anthony Borgia. I found
myself astounded at its compatibility with what I had
already learned from my LDS background. A personwould have had to study all of his life on this subject to
bring so many truths about the other side, or Spirit World,
together in the pages of one book.
As I read it, I received Witness after Witness (that
burning loving feeling from God) of its truths, and my
insight and learning grew tremendously. His book also
brought up a lot of new questions for which I couldnt find
answers. So broad and expansive were his descriptions of
the Spirit Life and the Spirit World that I found my own
religious teachings fell short. I also found that there is a
great fear among religious sects today, my own included,
of what the after life is like.
I decided to research the author of this book, andfound Robert Hugh Benson had been a priest for the
Church of England while in the flesh. As a priest, Benson
had written about 20 religious books, which were basically
along the same theological lines of his church. However, he
later converted to Catholicism. Having labored in England
as a missionary for the Mormon Church I was acquaintedwith the basic philosophies of the Church of England
and Catholic religions. I thus found it easy to understand
Bensons concept of God.
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In 1914 at the age of 42, Robert Benson died after a
short illness, and passed on to what he called the Spirit
World. Here he found that a lot of what he had writtenas a priest was incorrect, and it troubled him that he had
given out information that had become a stumbling block
for many, and was not helping them progress. After 25
years in the Spirit World he was granted the opportunity
to come back to a friend and dictate a book, or channel
information on what it is like to live in the Spirit Worldas a Spirit Individual. His book gives a lot of details as to
how this communication was done. He leaves few stones
unturned, and his eloquent way of writing far overshadows
my own. (If it bothers you that the book was channeled,
then take a look at all of Holy Writ and see if you can find
any writings from God or the other side that are not
channeled. If you think about it, you will conclude, as I
did, that there is nothing written from God that is not
channeled in some way.)
I felt compelled to get the message of this book out
to people and in the early part of 1993 I was able to obtain
the rights to publish Bensons book in the United States,
and began the process of getting it ready to go to press.When the book came out I placed radio ads on a local
LDS church owned radio station which was very skeptical
of what their listeners would think about the book. To
calm the stations fears, we decided to run the ads from
midnight to five oclock a.m. and see if they received any
negative feed back. These ads were run at random times,and because of the time frame, were not too expensive.
At about four oclock a.m. on the third night of running
the ads, I was awakened abruptly from a very sound sleep.
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It was as if someone had grabbed the front of my shirt and
pulled me to a sitting position in bed. At the same time I
heard a voice say, You need to listen to the ad on the radioright now. The voice was not harsh or demanding but
confident in its tone, if you can call it a tone of voice for I
could not distinguish whether I heard the sound with my
ears or in my mind.
For a moment I thought I must still be dreaming and I
started to lie back down when I was firmly pulled forwardagain and the exact same words were repeated. At this
point I began to fumble around in the dark for the radio.
This woke my wife up and she asked sleepily, What are
you doing?
I said, I need to listen to the ad on the radio.
She said, Its four in the morning; go back to sleep.
In the dark I kept fumbling with the radio until it
came on, and then I began to play with the unlit tuner. As
I turned the knob I came across the radio station the very
second the ad started to play.
My wife then sat up and asked, What is going on?
I said, I dont know, but I do know that I need to
listen to the ad right now.When the ad finished I set the radio down and
through the dark I could see that my wife had a puzzled
and somewhat fearful look: Mike . . . there is someone
here in our room.
No, I said.
There are three of them and they are right overthere. She pointed.
Although I looked about the room and saw nothing
out of the normal, I could distinctly feel or sense three
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individuals off to my right. The best way I can describe it is
to say that they put off energy, and I instinctively knew they
were males, or that it was male energy. How exactly I knewthis, I cannot say. It is difficult sometimes to describe how
information from the Spirit World is conveyed because
much of the time it is received differently from the way in
which we usually communicate knowledge.
At the time I dont remember thinking about being
afraid or scared, but later I did look back on the experienceand marvel at how calm I was, yet rather excited to have
such an experience.
Not knowing what to do next, I tried to relax and
immediately I heard a voice in my mind say, I am Robert
Benson and I want to thank you for your interest in my
behalf. If you have any questions about the Spirit World I
am here to answer those questions.
All of my communication with Robert and his two
friends were done by speaking mentally back and forth.
My wife and I would talk back and forth verbally deciding
what to ask, and then I would relax and mentally ask the
question. The visitors would immediately answer in the
same way. The answers were so clear and distinct that Iasked my wife several times if she could hear what they
were saying, but she could not.
We asked every question we could think of and I was
surprised at some of the strange answers that Robert gave.
This correspondence took place for about 40 minutes, after
which time I began to feel extremely tired even though Ihad just had most of a nights sleep.
Robert and his friends seemed to ignore my need for
a change in pace so I point blank told them: I need a rest.
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Either I need to go back to sleep, or make love to my wife,
or something, but I need a change.
To this they said nothing but I could hear themcommunicating among themselves. As Robert and his two
friends began to leave, their images came into view and I
could see them as one sees three friends walking away after
a short chat. (Whether this was with my physical eyes or
spiritual eyes I cannot say, but I saw them without having
to strain or concentrate.) Then the one on the right lookedback and said, Enjoy it while you can. I was astonished
at his apparent sense of humor, and it did leave a lasting
impression on me.
My greatest mistake was not writing down what we
asked and what they said in return. Within two weeks my
wife and I could only remember about half of what was
said in that forty minute encounter. Still it was just as real
as me writing this now, and I basked in the joy of having
had this break through of the veil.
As simple and comfortable as this encounter seemed,
we came to the realization that we had actually talked with
the dead, and our lives were changed. I knew from that
moment on I would never be the same. I would nevergo to a funeral again and think of that persons body in
the box as anything more than a pile of earth that at one
time housed the personality of someone I knew. The real
person, the life essence, or spirit, was still as alive as it
had ever been, but it was now free of the limitations (and
advantages!) of the physical body.As you may well imagine I was very quiet about whom
I told this experience, and how. For a time and out of
fear of being ostracized I kept the experience to myself,
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only telling my father and one or two trusted friends.
Some very important truths came out of this meeting.
Not that Robert and his friends told me anything so earthshattering or profound, but what I learned about myself
and how God works would change my life forever.
First: I came to realize that the heavens are not
sealed, that the other side, as we have come to call it, is
a real place. It exists just as much as we do now. These
personalities or spirits, as we on earth like to refer tothem, have desires to grow, progress, and share what they
know, just like we often do. Later on I will explain this
in more detail.
Second: This place is accessible to anyone at any time.
Worthiness has no bearing on whether you can talk to
God or hear His voice, or any other voice or person from
the Spirit World.
This was a very radical shift from my upbringing. I
had always been taught that the only way you could experi-
ence the things of God was by being worthy, with no real
definition or sometimes too many definitions of what that
word worthy meant.
Then I remembered reading in the scriptures whereGod had called to Cain, after Cain had just killed Abel,
and said, Cain where is thy brother? Cain was a murderer
and yet God had just spoken to him. I felt even more sure
that God could speak to me as well, even if it was not
directly, but through a spirit named Robert Benson.
If worthiness had no bearing on talking to God, thenwhat did? Why were some able to do it and others not?
Jesus gave the answer when He said, If you believe,
you can do all things. I was learning that belief is
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everything, for it is the foundation of faith the idea of
worthiness was something apart and has judgment written
all over it.The power of believing that you can get through the
veil is critical. If you exercise no faith that it will happen, I
promise you that it wont. At the least you must be neutral
to the possibility of the world of Spirit to even experience
something from that realm that you dont understand.
Third: I found that I had to be very flexible. If I hadan agenda of how I thought it had to happen, then I was
setting myself up for disappointment.
This too was a difficult lesson to learn, because others
would tell me that God only worked a certain way, which
of course they knew, even though they hadnt had any
experience with God or someone from the Spirit World
speaking to them.
When I gave up the idea that it had to happen for
me as it had happened for someone else, things began to
move forward at a faster pace. I was taking God out of the
box where I had put Him/Her (theres another box), and
tearing down the barriers that had blocked my mind to
learning more truth. That is not to say that I was wrong inmy first thinking or my early understanding of God, but
that I was now building upon what I had learned, and that
enabled me to go further than I had before. At least I was
seeing a shift in myself and progress being made.
I also noticed that if I found I was being criticized by
those who didnt understand the changes that were takingplace in my life, or if they felt that I was not going about
this the right way, then I tried to look at the kind of person
they were, and what they had accomplished in their lives.
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There are many places in the Holy Writ, and even Jesus
said, By their fruits ye shall know them. I had to ask
myself, Were my actions and accomplishments loving,kind, and gentle; was I at peace with myself and God?
And how about those who didnt understand? Were they
displaying these loving attributes? If not, should I be
heeding their advice?
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Two weeks after meeting Robert Benson, I was driving
only three or four blocks from my home when I began to
get that Witness of the Spirit feeling again. This was
a very strong sensation and it went from the top of my
head to the tips of my toes. I started feeling sweaty and I
thought that my whole body was going to overheat.
I began to have the sense that my grandfather was
there with me. He had passed away eight years earlier and
although we were close I had not thought much about him,
even though I had enjoyed being in his company. I saw
nothing unnatural, but could feel a familiar energy that my
grandfather was emanating.As with Robert Benson I tried to clear my mind of all
thoughts and listen for a voice, but nothing came, just this
extremely intense feeling of great joy. As the feeling began
to fade I looked next to me in the passenger seat and actu-
ally pointed my finger in that direction, and said out loud,
I know that you are here, Grandpa, and when I get to theother side, I want you to tell me how you made me feel this
way. Still I heard no speaking. At this point I so wanted
to hear him or see him, but there was no contact in what
CHAPTER 3
My Grandfather
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we would call a normal or physical way.
Because of the close connection with my grandfa-
ther when he was still in the flesh, this encounter surpris-ingly meant a lot more to me than the meeting with Robert
Benson. Although Robert and his two friends were visible
to my physical eye they still did not have the impact that
my grandfather did. Looking back on it now, I think the
added emotion tied in with this encounter gave it a much
longer lasting and deeper meaning for me.It took a couple of days for the effects to wear off, and
even after a few weeks all I had to do was think about the
experience and immediately the feeling would return, and
I could to some degree, enjoy him again.
As the weeks began to roll on with publishing Life
in the World Unseen, my grandfather started coming
more frequently. If I became still, focused, medita-
tive, or went into the now (which I will explain later),
I could actually hear his voice and he would speak to me.
The encounters always seemed to have a purpose and I
pondered often at how concerned he seemed to be about
his family and what was happening to his posterity. Several
times he came with information about my living grand-mother, and things that I could do to help her.
In late July of 1993, my grandfather made a most
unusual visit while I was driving to work on the freeway
one early morning. My grandfather suddenly, without
warning, appears in the car with me! Now he is not sitting
invisibly next to me, but I can actually see him standing inthe middle of the dashboard half in and half out of the car!
Exactly how this works I havent a clue. He is dressed as I
remember seeing him when he was still in the flesh. The
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road and the rest of the area behind him, in front of the
car, have gone gray and it seems as though the vehicle is
on auto pilot.The first words out of his mouth are, Whatever you
do, dont stop growing and developing spiritually, it will
put you so much further ahead in the world to come. At
this time he also tells me several personal things about my
life and tasks I should do which will help me to progress.
Then he explains that a cousin of mine is in need of helpand he wants me to call and try to be of assistance!
As he leaves, my surroundings go back to normal, but
I can still feel the energy he brought with him. It is peaceful
and serene calming, yet direct. It is hard to convey now
the true depth of what I was feeling at the time.
To experience the continuation of a relationship that
had ended with death was new to me. It is really difficult
to convey the magnitude of what it felt like. When people
died I had learned to drop them from my contact list.
That was the end of any kind of relationship. Yet here he
was literally continuing our friendship. There really is
no deathjust a transformation to another state of living.
The mind or personality is exactly the same mind it wasupon the change to spirit life. I had always had a belief in
the afterlife, but to switch to a knowing or sure knowledge
that it is there, is a bit of a jump.
I knew I had to act on my grandfathers wishes.
As I made the first call I could feel the hesitation in my
voice when my cousins wife answered the phone. I hadonly seen my cousin once in five years and it was a little
awkward trying to help him when I didnt even know what
he needed. His wife was very nice on the phone, but told
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me everything was fine and that they didnt need my help.
With this I let it go and went about my normal routine.
It had never occurred to me to have my grandfather bespecific about what was wrong.
A couple of weeks later the same thing happened
againmy grandfather came to me and repeated the same
words about helping my cousin. This visit was not visual,
but verbal only. I could hear him very clearly and feel his
presence, but saw nothing with my physical eyes. StrangelyI began to find it hard to tell if I was hearing his voice with
my physical ears or in my mindsort of like seeing Robert
Benson and wondering if I saw him with my physical
eyes or with spiritual sight. The two worlds feel closely
connected and overlap in so many ways, it actually seems
very natural.
After this visit I again made the call to my cousin,
with the same results. A bit more embarrassed than the
first time, I dismissed the incident but began to wonder
just a bit if I was losing my mind. Why would I be asked to
help someone who didnt need help?
Another two weeks went by and again my grandfather
came and gave me the same message for the third time.With extreme trepidation I sunk my head and thought, not
again. How can he do this to me? Am I just a guinea
pig and they are having their fun with me? How many
times can I do this? But this time there was a different
result. When I asked my cousins wife if there was anything
I could do to help them, she started to cry.After some time she composed herself and began to tell
me a most bizarre tale about her adopted children. Before
she and my cousin married she was married to another
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man and they had adopted four children. These children
came from three different cultural backgrounds: Indian,
Korean, and African American. It was a family blend thatwas sure to present challenges to the best of parents. Then,
accusations of child molesting led to a divorce and left the
family very dysfunctional.
When my cousin came on the scene, it at first seemed
that the family was going to find stability again, but that
was short-lived. Within a brief period of time the teenagegirls were accusing my cousin of similar problems. His
wife informed me that Family Services had just picked up
the children and put them in foster homes.
Both my cousin and his wife were devastated. I then
asked her, How could I help? She said that they needed an
attorney and the money to fight Family Services and prove
that they were fit parents. At this point I had no money and
knew of no attorney that handled such cases. I didnt have
the courage to tell my cousins wife that our dead grandfa-
ther had told me to call, so I just said, I dont know exactly
what to do, but I think I know someone who can help. Ill
get in touch with him and see what he has to say.
By this time I had learned that if I prayed and askedthe Lord to send my grandfather, he would immediately
respond. This would not work, however, if I only put a
casual effort into my request. The endeavor had to be
genuine and with a concentrated intent (in time this process
would become easier). When I requested of the Lord to
send my grandfather on this occasion, he was immediatelythere. (I later learned that I could leave the Lord out of
the request and still get results, but I had to be a bit more
careful about what I received.)
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My grandfathers instructions were to call my attorney
and get a referral for another attorney from him. This I did,
and my attorney not only gave me a referral for anotherattorney, but he gave me a list of four lawyers to choose
from. As soon as I concentrated on the list, I heard my
grandfathers voice and felt that warm feeling again. He
showed me which attorney to call, by saying him and
having the name light up on the page, so I never even
bothered contacting the others.To my surprise the attorney that I called was a bishop
in the Mormon Church. I felt that if anyone would under-
stand my cousins need for help, it would be this man. He
wanted to meet with my cousin and his wife and then
contact me.
This he did a few days later, and told me that he would
like to take the case. He felt he would be able to help my
cousin get his children back. I then asked him how much
he charged and he said, One hundred dollars per hour. I
am sure he heard me gasp on the other end of the phone.
I then asked, Do you ever do these things on a lump sum
basis? I gulped. I think that my terminology caught him
off guard a bit, but he understood what I meant and said itwould take $5000.00 to see this case through. This seemed
like a mountain of money as I was trying to get my little
book publishing business off the ground. I could think
of ten places that I could spend that kind of money rather
than putting it into something that seemed like someone
elses problem.I said, I dont have the money, but I know someone
who may be able to help me get it. Ill have to get back
to you. Please dont say anything to my cousin about how
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much this is going to cost; I know that it will only put him
under more stress. He agreed and thanked me for helping
him get involved with the case. I think he felt a genuineconnection with this family and really did want to help.
It was only a split second before my grandfather was
talking to me. He said, Dont worry about the money; we
will help you get it. I must admit this didnt help me to
forget about the money. I could see no way that my busi-
ness was going to get those kinds of funds. It would havebeen easier to crawl across the freeway naked in rush hour
traffic than to find $5000.00!
About a week later, in early September, my grand-
father came again. He told me to get a thousand dollars
together and go to Las Vegas. Once I was there he would
show me what to do.
For the first time since his appearing to me, I started
to question what he was telling me, and I wrestled with his
instructions. I found that the communication line was not
as clear. This, I didnt know at the time, was because of
my lack of faith. I asked him what he wanted me to do in
Las Vegas, but he would give me no answer. In my mind
I kept trying not to think about it, but I still couldnt helpbut wonder if he was going to have me gamble.
Although he was not speaking, I knew he was
listening, so I told him I had never gambled in my life, and
that what he was asking me to do was totally out of char-
acter for me. He still did not answer back, so I resolved to
get the thousand dollars together and play it by ear (go bythe spirit).
When I got to Las Vegas I began to hear my grand-
fathers voice again and he directed me to Caesars Palace.
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There he had me sit at the roulette wheel and we began
playing. This was by no means something I was forced to
do; nor was my free will taken away at any time. EverythingI was doing I did of my own free will and choice.
Now I simply tried to concentrate on my grandfather
and have him give me any instructions that he felt I needed.
Never, ever in my life had I been in such an awkward posi-
tion. This place seemed to have no redeeming qualities,
and I kept questioning myself why I was there. One thingI was sure of; I was not here for my own personal gain. I
would rather have starved.
Still I persisted taking one step at a time, and then
things started to happen. After about an hour I had
tripled what I came with and began to see light at the
end of the tunnel. Even to this day I can feel the pride
that came over me as I was winning the money that my
cousin needed to get his children back. It was a feeling of
exuberance that I was beating the system. Then, as fast
as I had won it . . . I lost it all! Not just the winnings, but
the seed money as well!
Dejected, at one oclock in the morning, I went out
to my Jeep and lay down in the back. As I thought onthe events that had just taken place, I began to plead with
heaven that I could have an answer to why this had turned
out so negatively. Not only was I short the $5000.00 that
my cousin needed, but I was out the $1000.00 I had brought
with me. Money was tight at the time and this was begin-
ning to feel like a mean trick. It was much easier to blamemy grandfather than to ever blame myself. I knew that
getting angry would not solve the problem, but some outlet
for the frustration I was feeling would really be nice!
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Then I heard my grandfathers voice. He said, We
just had to see if you would do it. In kind of an angry
tone I shot back, But you knew that I would do whateveryou asked!
And he said Yes, but you didnt know that you would
do it. You put too much emphasis on money.
Then I said, Thats easy for you to say; you dont
have to eat, or buy clothes or put a roof over your head!
He replied, Go home and we will provide the money tohelp your cousin.
It was a long rather embarrassing six hour journey back
home. Not often have I felt sorry for myself or indulged in
self pity, but I did this time! Looking back I can see that I
had far too much interest in the outcome. I was not going
to be happy unless it turned out the way I thought it was
supposed to. I would soon learn differently. The other side
had a different agenda for me on this trip.
(I have included this in my history here because it
has impacted myself and many others, and will at some
point have a greater significance to me than it does at this
writing. My thoughts are that by sharing it now, its future
roll may have a smoother transition.)On the way home I was led to take a side jaunt to
a gold mining venture known as the Relief Mine, or the
Dream Mine. This mine is just south of Spanish Fork,
Utah, and has never produced any monetary benefit to its
supporters since its opening back in the late 1800s.
Starting with a dream experienced by John Koyle,this mine has created more spiritual controversy than any
single project in Utah history. The fact that John Koyle
made prediction after prediction that came true, left even
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his staunchest critics wondering where this man fit into
the grand scheme of things. Although a strong supporter
of the Mormon Church, he found himself at odds with theleadership on many occasions.
It is hard to describe in words the feelings I had this
hot September day as I stepped foot on the property for
the first time. Some call it hallowed ground, or a spiritual
vortex; but for me, a newcomer to this place, it was an
exhilarating feeling I had never experienced before. I feltlight or buoyant as I walked. Why it had this effect on me I
cannot say. I have been back to the land many times since
and never felt the energy like I did that day.
Some time shortly after getting home, I had a dream
about this mine, in which I was taken into a cavern that
was opened up by the people working the mine. When we
entered this cavern, or large room, there were seven or
nine of us who had been selected to view and document
what was in this man made cave. We proceeded past other
caverns to this last one and entered from what seemed to be
the west side, (if one is able to tell directions underground).
The room had some large columns which looked like they
may have been left for support. Near one of these columnsI saw a vase about three feet high and ten inches across the
top. It was filled with gold coins that had inscriptions on
them I had never seen. Records of every type and descrip-
tion were all around. Most of them seemed to be made of
metal but I did not examine them close enough to be sure.
At one end of the room there was a table that attracted myattention, but I could not tell why I was drawn to it. On
top of the table were writing instruments that I had never
seen before.
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I started to ask questions about what I was seeing and
the dream began to fade. I know that I was told many
things about this place but I have never been able to recallthe specifics. I suppose that in time I will understand with
greater detail what this is all about. Until then I am satis-
fied to let it unfold in its time. How Koyles visions and
mine will finally play out I cannot say, but I do know that
he fulfilled a great mission on this earth, of which we have
only seen the beginning.Within two weeks of getting home from Las Vegas my
business began to go crazy. I was doing radio interviews
by phone about the book, Life in the World Unseen all
over the country, and the books were selling better than
they ever had. Prior to this time I would sell between five
and fifteen books in the days following an interview; now
the numbers increased dramatically. One interview at a
station in Philadelphia sold over 300 copies within a few
hours. To my great surprise, I soon had earned enough
money to pay for my cousins legal battle. Although I had
stretched the payments out over a couple of months with
the attorney, I still had enough money to pay him and meet
all of my other obligations. At this point I found that mygrandfather was right, if I would just trust in what I was
given, it would all turn out for my good, even if I didnt
see it at the time.
The legal battle for the children went on for over a
year and in the end the parents decided it was in the best
interest of the children and their long term good to bewith families that better fit their needs. For me it was
another lesson in trying to not predict the outcome; just
do as I know to do.
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Sometime in early August, I had a most interesting
dream in which I was standing at the south end of a long
valley. I knew the valley ran north to south because the sun
had just come up to my right over some mountains and wasnot very high in the sky. On my left were smaller mountains
that didnt seem to have as much foliage on them.
At the time I was not sure exactly where I was, for
the surroundings were destroyed, and changed enough to
make it hard to identify features. As I looked up the middle
of the valley, all I could see was broken cement and twisted
metal. I knew that the destruction had just happened, but
I was unsure of the cause. My first thoughts were that this
looked like Hiroshima or Nagasaki, but I could see no
mushroom cloud to indicate a nuclear explosion. In fact
the sky looked totally clear. There was no smoke or fires
coming from the rubble. I was also surprised that I could
see no dust coming up from the falling of these structures,and I assumed the dust must have already settled by the
time I was viewing this.
Far down the valley I could still see nothing but
CHAPTER 4
Destruction Dream and
Learning to Listen
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flattened buildings. (After the dream was over I realized
that there were no people in this dream. I felt that they were
there, but I didnt see a single one.) I then heard a voice say,This is October 10th. The date stuck in my mind because
it was only two days after my oldest sons birthday. I waited
to hear an indication of what year, but it was never given.
For the next yea and a half I thought the valley I was
looking at was Salt Lake Valley from the south end, but
when I moved to Payson, Utah, in February of 1995, Ibegan to wonder if the valley that I was shown was actually
Utah County looking north from the hill about 200 yards
from our home. It fit the dream as well as the Salt Lake
Valley, but still that part was not clear enough to make a
definite identification.
The clearest part was the date, which I still feel will
transpire in the not too distant future. Exactly why I was
shown this particular dream I cannot say. Many times
I have tried to figure things out, only to find that it is
better to set the dreams aside and let them unfold in their
natural way. It reminds me of the statement, Let go and
let God.
As you read on you will see that my lifes story includesmany dreams and visions. These dreams and experiences
are woven together in a rather complex manner, but I have
tried hard not to use them to make life-changing decisions.
They have been more assistance in looking at myself and
seeing how I would react if placed in a particular situa-
tion. I have learned to gauge the accuracy of them by theirintensity or realness. This dream of destruction was one
of the more real ones that I have ever had. At the time it
seemed very vivid, but I had nothing to judge it by because
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this was the first of its kind, and it happened so early on
my path. Since then I have had many dreams that have
had definite meanings, and as we progress you will seethat these dreams foretold events that had significance in
my life.
During this same period of time I began to develop
a method that I found helpful in receiving revelation or
answers to prayer. I share it now to help your grasp of
why I walked my particular path. Many people have askedme how I talk to God or how I know that He is talking
back. And not just God, but any other entity that doesnt
have blood running through it. Mine is just one method
of many, but because it served me so well in the beginning
I used it continually until I found myself doing it without
any conscious effort or without knowing it was happening.
Where this idea came from or how I came up with this
technique I honestly cannot say. Perhaps it has been with
me for countless ages or I may have picked it up in my
sleep. Whatever the answer, it has worked well for me and
this method is so easy that anyone can learn it.
To start with, you must believe that the Spirit World
is real and that you can be spoken to just as people in theBible or prophets of old were spoken to. If you do not
have this basic belief it will be pointless for you to try this
exercise. What you receive you will not believe and your
efforts will be futile. Soon you would dismiss the experi-
ences and in time even forget that you have had them. For
this reason there is little harm in learning this method.A little further along we will discuss learning how to
discern those who wish to talk to you. For now, try to
exercise just a small belief that what I am telling you is the
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truth. Or if you cant go even that far, at least believe that
it is true for Mike Rigby and see if by plowing through this
you can visualize the broader picture of what I am tryingto explain.
In its simplest form this is nothing more than a
two-way communication between you and another indi-
vidual. If we take a few words from the Bible and assume
for a moment that they are true, you should be able to
see that God wants to communicate with us. James theApostle of Christ said, If any of you lack wisdom let him
ask of God that giveth to all men liberally and upbraideth
not. ( James 1:5)
Lets break this down for a moment: If any who
is not included here? To me this means that everyone is
on equal ground with respect to asking of God. No one
will be turned down for He giveth to all men liberally.
This being the case no color, race, or religious affilia-
tion is a prerequisite for receiving from God. Logic alone
will tell us that if God is truly a God of unconditional
love, then He can place no condition upon that love, or
the dispensing of it to his children. This also holds true for
hearing His voice, or for His giving liberally. To those whowant to put God in a box and say that He has to do it like
this or that I say, You need to experience God for your-
self, and your perspective on how He works will change
drastically. And then let everyone experience God for
themselves, in their own way.
I cannot emphasize enough how open God is to allpeople and how desirous all those on the light side are,
to help us progress. Those who find comfort or security in
the Bible or the way Jesus said it, should remember Jesus
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words when He was talking about His Father and He asked
this question: (Matthew: Chapter 7: verses 9-11.)
. . . Or what man is there of you, whom if his son askbread, will he give him a stone? . . . Or if he ask a fish, will
he give him a serpent? . . . If ye then, being evil, know
how to give good gifts unto your children, how much
more shall your Father which is in heaven give good
things to them that ask him?
It is important here that you put behind you the ideathat you are not going to get an answer, or that you are not
worthy: God will answer you. Now if we can get those two
stumbling blocks behind us He does talk to all and ALL
are worthy lets proceed to develop a way to communi-
cate or listen.
When you close your eyes, where are you? Not just
the physical you, but the mental you, or the spiritual you
the part that does the thinking. What happens to that part
of you (your personality), when you close your eyes and
are no longer able to concentrate or focus on the environ-
ment around you? Now close your ears or stop listening to
outside noises as well. If you need to put ear plugs in or ear
muffs on, do thatstop the external distractions.I ask this question, where are you? Because for me it
is relative to how I see myself from a spiritual perspective.
As I close my eyes, I am just behind where my eyes are
physically located on my body. In other words, the thinking
part of me is situated someplace close to the middle of my
brain. When I first started to continuously close my eyesand go to this place, it was like a room that was bound by
the sides of my skull. It is now much different in that the
limitations of my skull or the sides of the room have no
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restraints. For the purpose of helping you understand, and
maybe experiment on your own, lets go back to looking
at this as a space that has definite walls, top, and bottom.Relax and see if you can feel the energy of your thought
process as you drift or float in this place.
I did not feel this energy when I first started to receive
information, so I know that you can receive without recog-
nizing the energy. When I first found myself doing this
little exercise it was very deliberate and seemed a bit hokey.With time I began to find I could relax very quickly using
this method. Being in this space I would consciously try
to push any and all thoughts away from the center point or
area where I viewed myself.
You may find it even more helpful if you picture
yourself as a small person in this area with your hands
being held up pushing out any thoughts that may enter
your space. As I would do this I found that I could remain
neutral or without any thoughts for longer periods of time.
This state is nothing more than prayer or meditation
or the now. The longer I was here, the less effort it took
to keep the thoughts out. If you can maintain this state
for a while, you will notice that your breathing will slowdown, and for me, my heart beat drops drastically.
While here, many things can be done, not the least of
which is going to sleep. And this is a very deep sleep. Often
while traveling with friends for even short distances, I will
go into this space to catch up on needed rest.
If I now quit blocking the thoughts, I would beginto perceive or feel someone start to speak. Many times
this was only conceived as a thought, but more often I
found that I could hear a distinct voice or voices. These
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are very soft quiet voices that have always given me what
I would call my highest thought. (Never have I heard
any voice that was harsh, cruel, or mean. Many peopleclaim they hear harsh voices, but for me it has never
happened.) It took me a lot of practice and time before I
could learn to distinguish these voices. When you learn
to feel who is talking, you wil l also begin to recognize
the light that emanates from that individual. The only
way I can distinguish these voices is by their frequencyor intensity. This, as I mentioned before, seems to be
distinct to each individual.
I also found that the more I experienced these
frequencies the easier it was to gauge the level or quality
of light or enlightenment coming from the speaker. To my
great surprise, I was able to think back on earlier experi-
ences (like the one with Robert Benson) and re-measure
or re-experience the light others are giving off. This
ability to look back and see the light is a two-edged sword.
On the one hand it has been helpful to know what level
of light is coming from someone giving me information,
but on the other hand I found myself judging those who
were speaking by their level of light, and putting them inboxes or giving them labels that I afterwards discovered
in myself.
Later on in my history Ill share with you an experience
showing just how embarrassing seeing yourself for who you
really are can be. For now, if you are comfortable with this
technique; practice it on a daily basis. If you find that youhave a hard time concentrating on nothing try it for a
shorter period. When I first started, one minute seemed like
forever, but with a little work I could soon go into this space
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for ten minutes and it seemed like ten seconds.
Just dont give up on yourself. You have immeasur-
able help on the other side supporting you in your efforts.This may be something you find hard to believe, but I
assure you it is true. The more you work on this, the more
you will know just how connected and interrelated you and
God are.
My wife brought me back to the present when she
asked me what time it was. A few more minutes passedas we sat waiting at the church for others to pass judg-
ment on our lives. Surprisingly my anxiety was taken up
in the reflections of my life, leaving me calm and much
more relaxed than I would have normally been under such
circumstances. Again I began to reflect and the video of
my life seemed to pick up just where it had left off.
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Some time around September of 1993, after I had
had several voice communications with my grandfather
and seen his physical appearance in the car, I had another
pleasant but startling apparition at home.
One morning as I was getting ready to take a shower,I could again distinctly feel the presence of my grandfa-
ther. Dismissing the feeling and not hearing anyone speak,
I simply pulled the shower curtain back with my left hand
and started to step into the shower when I saw my grand-
father standing half way through the shower curtain! He
looked like his usual pleasant self with a smile that left me
relaxed but a little unnerved.
Here I was, buff naked, shocked at sharing my shower.
Without even thinking I said, Grandfather, dont you have
any respect? And he said Mike, we see everything you
do. I knew that statement alone would change my life,
and I told him that I didnt think I would tell my wife what
he said. I could see by the smile on his face that he knewwhere I was going with this one!
Again my grandfather gave me information to help
his family. He spoke of my grandmother and told me that
CHAPTER 5
Christ inMyL
ife
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she needed my attention. Then as quickly as he had come
he was gone.
Later, as I tried to analyze why he had appeared inperson at this time and not at others, I could only conclude
that at the time, for some unknown reason, it was impor-
tant that I see him visually.
Since then, however, I have learned that it is totally
within my ability to have any visitor from the other side
stay longer than they or I had planned. I have found thatit only takes conscious effort or an exercise in faith on my
part, and the whole experience can be stretched out until I
feel it is time to end the encounter.
I should also point out here, of all that my grandfa-
ther taught me, one lesson stands out above the others.
The first time I felt my grandfather in the car with me
you will recall that I said, When I get to the other side
I want you to tell me how you made me feel this way....
To my great joy, I didnt have to wait until passing to
the Spirit World to get an answer to this question. Once
as we were talking, I simply asked him how it was that
each time he came around I got this burning feeling, or
Witness of the Spirit.He said, Because I act in the office of the Holy
Ghost.
I said, What are you talking about, the Holy Ghost
is a Spirit?
He said, Yes, that is true, and there is an individual
whom you call the Holy Ghost who presides over or over-sees this office. It would be more accurate to call it the
mind and will of God. But the reality of how it works is
much different than what you have perceived. There are
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literally millions of individuals who act in this office, or a
better way to put it, who have this power. It is the power
to witness or give a witness of truth by the strong burningfeeling of peace that comes from within. Anytime you see
truth, speak truth, or hear truth, we can confirm it by this
burning feeling. I dont know that I could have been more
shocked. This concept seemed to make sense, but it was a
radical change from my upbringing.
(Please note here that I use the word Holy Ghost,because of my church or ecclesiastical upbringing. It was a
word that I was used to and understood. You may choose
burning, warmth, goose bumps, or any other number of
definitions for the same feeling.)
I have since learned that even the concept that my
grandfather gave me is more structured than how this
power is used on higher levels. Those spirits who live or
operate in the upper levels of Light use the Witness of
the Spirit power more as an extension of who they are,
with no conscious effort needed. They act as though this is
just the way it is. Whereas within my grandfathers realm;
it takes mental exertion to give this feeling to mortals. I
also have the feeling this office is a very large step ofprogression for my grandfather and those around him.
It was not long after this visit that my life took yet
another dramatic turn. I was asking my grandfather
questions of a spiritual nature, when I heard a new voice
answer my enquiry. Although it was not the voice of my
grandfather, it was somehow familiar. A peaceful, lovingfeeling of contentment enveloped me, and I instinctively
knew who it was. I wasnt sure where or when, but I had
experienced that voice before. Perhaps it wasnt the voice
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as much as the feeling behind the voice that I knew. I
wanted my grandfather to confirm it to me and so I said,
Grandpa, who speaks?He confirmed my feelings, Thats the Lord, and He
is the one whom you should follow. Suddenly the feeling
intensified and went much deeper into my being. Oh, that
every soul on earth could feel of this intense warmth!
From that day on I have had very limited conversations
with my grandfather, since his work with me was finishedand it was time for me to move on. I shall ever be grateful
for the role my Grandfather Bryant has played in my life,
both in the flesh and in the spirit. His love and concern
for my wellbeing and especially my spiritual growth will
ever be a source of strength to me. I can only hope that
his growth during this important period in my life was as
great as mine. The bond that was developed between us
will last forever, worlds without end.
What unfolded next I can only describe as overwhelming.
For some five plus months everything that I received
from the other side of the veil came directly or indirectly
from Jesus.
I could not begin to try and explain to you what loveemanates from this Being. Words would only confine
the experience and limit how grand and enjoyable it was.
I shall, however, explain to you the things that He did
with me, and the teachings I received at the hand of the
Master Teacher.
As with my grandfather, all I had to do was go intothat quiet mode I have talked about before, and immedi-
ately He (Jesus) would come and begin to speak.
These experiences were much like the ones with
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Grandfather Bryant. I was able to feel His presence and
hear His voice but at this time did not see Him physically.
I could go on for hours about the conversations that wehad together. Never did I find Him to be condemning
of anyone. He always sees the good in others. It became
embarrassing to even bring up a topic that would put
another person or group of people in a negative light (if
there is even such a thing as negative light), for each time
that I did He would show me how what they were goingthrough was exactly what they needed in order to prog-
ress spiritually.
I have always felt that my attitude towards life and
others was positive, but Jesus had me beat hands down.
Anything I asked, He would answer and usually did it with
a question that sent me thinking for several minutes if not
days. The depth of His thought process is astounding. He
could see three steps ahead of my thinking all the time.
Each time He spoke or gave me an answer I would marvel
at His wisdom. It became easy to see why He has the role
He does with this earth.
I also found out why so many refer to Him as Master.
Truly He has mastered all things. To my surprise, Jesus,very early in our working together, had me set aside the
title Master, for it created too much class distinction
and He much preferred we be on a more equal basis. It
will surprise some that Jesus is far more interested in our
becoming like Him than in worshiping Him.
Within the first few weeks of working with the Lord I hadtwo very incredible experiences. Both changed my outlook,
but the second one was much more profound than the first.
Some time in August I had gotten a little bold about
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sharing a few of the experiences I had had in the spring of
that same year. This boldness led me to open up to a friend
who I shall name Mr. Call. To my great astonishment andrelief he actually believed what I told him, and he even
shared it with a lady friend of his that was of the same
mental persuasion. They were both affiliated to a small
degree with a group of religious people in central Utah.
This body of believers in Christ was not a formal religion
at the time, but were simply people seeking further lightand knowledge. Mr. Call told these friends what had
happened to me, and their small assembly of believers in
Christ wanted me to come down and share in person the
experiences that I had with Robert Benson.
This I agreed to do in September, and found it to be
a most enjoyable association. A spirit of great warmth and
openness could be felt among these people as I told them
what had happened to me. They did not question my truth-
fulness but asked many questions about the details, which
they found puzzling, as these experiences took place.
Two or three weeks after I had spoken to these people
they called me on the phone and asked if I wanted to come
down and go through a learning session with them, whichthey called The true order of prayer. They said it was to
help a person better communicate with God.
Not knowing if this was something that I should go
through or not, I turned to the Lord, with whom I had
just started working and asked Him what I should do. His
answer was much different than I had expected. I hadhoped for a simple yes or no, but what I got was a ques-
tion: Mike, can you hear my voice?
I said, Yes Lord, you know I can hear you.
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He responded with another question, Then why do
you need that? What followed next was a several minute
explanation of why He had said what He did and what thepurpose of the true order of prayer was.
The gist of the conversation was this: Mike, all
people coming into the flesh are here to learn because
they see themselves separated from their creator. This is a
very natural process. Within each of us is a desire to gain
back that closeness and love that we have felt in the past.Through the experiences of life, our ability to recognize
that love and the power we each have to manifest it and
bring it to us, becomes clouded.
When we were young, our innocence kept this
connection with the Kingdom of God closer. It is the
reason that I said, Except ye become as a little child you
cannot enter into the kingdom of heaven. These people,
and all others who are using different forms of medita-
tion, are only trying to reconnect with the part of them
they think is missing. Most never realize that to make the
connection they need not go through any pomp and cere-
mony. The Kingdom of Heaven is within you, means that
it is within your grasp, even nowas well as the fact that itis not outside of who you are.
Actually you are the Kingdom of God. The Kingdom
is not something man builds with his hands. It is that
power of God that is built within you. If you have learned
to hear my voice, then why would you want to go back to
using the crutches of robes, incense, or oils? That is whypeople use these physical props, and if these put them in a
state of mind where they can communicate with Me better,
then I support them in it k