at the bay 1921
TRANSCRIPT
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I
VERY early morning. T
hidden under a white sea
You could not see whereroad was gone and the pa
dunes covered with reddi
beach and where was the
hung on the bushes and j
stalks, and all the marigo
earth with wetness. Drenc
nasturtium leaves. It look
though one immense wa
waked up in the middle
window and gone again. .
Ah-Aah! sounded the sl
streams flowing, quickly,
basins and out again; an
something else–what was
such silence that it seeme
Round the corner of Cres
of sheep came pattering.
their thin, stick-like legs t
them. Behind them an old
his nose to the ground, b
rocky gateway the shephe
coat that was covered wit
wide-awake with a folded
his belt, the other grasped
time, he kept up a very
mournful and tender. The
ashamed of his levity, an
ran forward in little patte
answered them from unde
the same piece of grou
puddles; the same soakin
http://www.katherinemansfieldsociety.org
AT THE BAY (1921)
By Katherine Mansfield
e sun was not yet risen, and the whole of
-mist. The big bush-covered hills at the bac
they ended and the paddocks and bungalowdocks and bungalows the other side of it; t
sh grass beyond them; there was nothing t
sea. A heavy dew had fallen. The grass w
ust did not fall; the silvery, fluffy toi-toi w
lds and the pinks in the bungalow gardens
hed were the cold fuchsias, round pearls of
ed as though the sea had beaten up softly i
e had come rippling, rippling–how far?
f the night you might have seen a big fis
. .
epy sea. And from the bush there came
lightly, slipping between the smooth stones,
d there was the splashing of big drops on
it?–a faint stirring and shaking, the snapping
some one was listening.
cent Bay, between the piled-up masses of b
hey were huddled together, a small, tossing
rotted along quickly as if the cold and the q
sheep-dog, his soaking paws covered with s
t carelessly, as if thinking of something els
rd himself appeared. He was a lean, upright
a web of tiny drops, velvet trousers tied un
blue handkerchief round the brim. One hand
a beautifully smooth yellow stick. And as he
soft light whistling, an airy, far-away fl
old dog cut an ancient caper or two and t
walked a few dignified paces by his maste
ring rushes; they began to bleat, and ghostl
r the sea. "Baa! Baaa!" For a time they seem
d. There ahead was stretched the sandy
bushes showed on either side and the sam
1
Crescent Bay was
k were smothered.
began. The sandyere were no white
mark which was
as blue. Big drops
s limp on its long
were bowed to the
ew lay on the flat
n the darkness, as
erhaps if you had
flicking in at the
he sound of little
gushing into ferny
large leaves, and
of a twig and then
oken rock, a flock
, woolly mass, and
uiet had frightened
nd, ran along with
e. And then in the
ld man, in a frieze
der the knee, and a
was crammed into
walked, taking his
ting that sounded
en drew up sharp,
r's side. The sheep
y flocks and herds
ed to be always on
road with shallow
shadowy palings.
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Then something immense
stretched out. It was the
there was a strong whiff
The shepherd stopped whand, screwing up his eyes
marvellous how quickly t
rolled up from the bush
jostled and shouldered ea
bright, pure blue-was re
telegraph poles, flashed i
it made one's eyes ache t
acorn, out of his breast p
shavings and stuffed the b
blue smoke wreathed his
"Baa! Baaa!" The sheep s
before the first sleeper t
dreams of little children .
little woolly lambs of sle
Florrie, sitting on the gat
she saw the old sheep-d
head, and seemed to gi
creature!" said Florrie. B
his legs from side to side.
her a silly young female.
The breeze of morning li
mingled with the sharp s
over the shepherd's head
ruffling its small breast fe
charred-looking little wha
strayed over a yellow sw
and headed them for the
towards Daylight Cove. "
drying road. The shepher
little bowl hung over. An
along a ledge of rock aft
pushing, nudging, hurryin
out of sight.
II
A few moments later the
broad-striped bathing suit
tussock grass into the holl
the big porous stones, ov
oil. Splish-Splosh! Splish
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came into view; an enormous shock-haired
ig gum-tree outside Mrs. Stubbs' shop, and
f eucalyptus. And now big spots of light gl
istling; he rubbed his red nose and wet bear, glanced in the direction of the sea. The su
he mist thinned, sped away, dissolved from
and was gone as if in a hurry to escape; b
ch other as the silvery beams broadened. T
lected in the puddles, and the drops, sw
to points of light. Now the leaping, glitterin
look at it. The shepherd drew a pipe, the b
cket, fumbled for a chunk of speckled tobac
owl. He was a grave, fine-looking old man.
ead, the dog, watching, looked proud of him
read out into a fan. They were just clear of
rned over and lifted a drowsy head; their
. . who lifted their arms to drag down, to
p. Then the first inhabitant appeared; it w
post, far too early as usual, looking for the
g she sprang up quickly, arched her back,
e a little fastidious shiver. "Ugh! What
t the old sheep-dog, not looking up, waggle
Only one of his ears twitched to prove that h
fted in the bush and the smell of leaves a
ell of the sea. Myriads of birds were singin
and, perching on the tiptop of a spray, it
thers. And now they had passed the fisherm
re where Leila the milk-girl lived with her o
amp and Wag, the sheep-dog, padded after
steeper, narrower rocky pass that led out of
Baa! Baaa!" Faint the cry came as they roc
put away his pipe, dropping it into his breas
straightway the soft airy whistling began
r something that smelled, and ran back aga
g, the sheep rounded the bend and the shep
back door of one of the bungalows opened
flung down the paddock, cleared the stile,
ow, staggered up the sandy hillock, and race
r the cold, wet pebbles, on to the hard san
-Splosh! The water bubbled round his legs
2
iant with his arms
as they passed by
eamed in the mist.
on his wet sleevewas rising. It was
the shallow plain,
ig twists and curls
he far-away sky–a
imming along the
sea was so bright
owl as small as an
o, pared off a few
s he lit up and the
.
he summer colony
ry sounded in the
cuddle the darling
s the Burnells' cat
ir milk-girl. When
drew in her tabby
coarse, revolting
past, flinging out
e saw, and thought
d wet black earth
. A goldfinch flew
turned to the sun,
an's hut, passed the
ld Gran. The sheep
, rounded them up
Crescent Bay and
ked along the fast-
-pocket so that the
gain. Wag ran out
in disgusted. Then
erd followed after
, and a figure in a
rushed through the
d for dear life over
that gleamed like
as Stanley Burnell
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waded out exulting. First
down to souse his head an
"Hail, brother! All hail, Twater.
Great Scott! Damnation t
an arm lifted. It was Jo
voice.
"Yes, very fine!" said Sta
of the sea? Why should h
lunge and struck out, sw
came, his black hair sleek
"I had an extraordinary dr
What was the matter with
words. And it was always
cranky idea he'd got hold
back and kicked with hi
dreamed I was hanging o
would be! thought Stanle
here, Trout," he said, "I'm
"You're WHAT?" Jonathwater, then reappeared ag
"All I mean is," said Stanl
in a hurry. I've work to do
Jonathan was gone before
and he slid away through
ruined Stanley's bathe. W
again, and then as quick
cheated.
Jonathan stayed a little lo
and letting the sea rock hi
was fond of Stanley Bur
poke fun at him, but at bo
in his determination to ma
out one day, and then wh
wave lifted Jonathan, rod
a beauty! And now there
spending oneself. He got
toes into the firm, wrinkl
flow of life, but to give w
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man in as usual! He'd beaten them all agai
d neck.
ou Mighty One!" A velvety bass voice cam
ke it! Stanley lifted up to see a dark head b
athan Trout–there before him! "Glorious
nley briefly. Why the dickens didn't the fell
e come barging over to this exact spot? Sta
imming overarm. But Jonathan was a mat
on his forehead, his short beard sleek.
am last night!" he shouted.
the man? This mania for conversation irrita
the same–always some piffle about a drea
of, or some rot he'd been reading. Stanley
legs till he was a living waterspout. But
ver a terrifically high cliff, shouting to so
y. He could stick no more of it. He stoppe
in rather a hurry this morning."
n was so surprised–or pretended to be–thatin blowing.
ey, "I've no time to–to–to fool about. I want
this morning–see?"
Stanley had finished. "Pass, friend!" said th
the water with scarcely a ripple . . . But cur
hat an unpractical idiot the man was! Stanle
y swam in again, and away he rushed up
ger in the water. He floated, gently moving
long, skinny body. It was curious, but in spi
ell. True, he had a fiendish desire to tease
ttom he was sorry for the fellow. There was
ke a job of everything. You couldn't help fee
t an almighty cropper he'd come! At that m
past him, and broke along the beach with a j
came another. That was the way to live–car
n to his feet and began to wade towards the
ed sand. To take things easy, not to fight a
ay to it–that was what was needed. It was th
3
. And he swooped
booming over the
obbing far out and
orning!" sang the
w stick to his part
ley gave a kick, a
h for him. Up he
ed Stanley beyond
he'd had, or some
turned over on his
even then . . . "I
eone below." You
splashing. "Look
he sank under the
o get this over. I'm
bass voice gently,
e the fellow! He'd
y struck out to sea
the beach. He felt
his hands like fins,
te of everything he
him sometimes, to
something pathetic
ling he'd be caught
oment an immense
oyful sound. What
elessly, recklessly,
shore, pressing his
gainst the ebb and
is tension that was
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all wrong. To live–to liv
light, as though laughing
But now he was out of theas though someone was
shivering, all his muscles
III
Beryl was alone in the li
stiff collar and a spotted ti
to town for the day. Drop
plate.
"I've just got twenty-fiveready, Beryl?"
"Mother's just gone for it,
"Thanks!" Stanley took a
the sugar."
"Oh, sorry!" But even the
this mean? As Stanley h
shot a quick glance at his
"Nothing wrong, is there?
Beryl's head was bent; sh
"Nothing," said her light
should there be?"
"O-oh! No reason at all as
At that moment the doo
porridge plate. They werwere bare, and each had
Behind them came Mrs. F
"Carefully, children," sh
loved being allowed to ca
"Yes, grandma." They set
"Good morning, Stanley!"
"Morning, mother! How's
http://www.katherinemansfieldsociety.org
! And the perfect morning, so fresh and f
t its own beauty, seemed to whisper, "Why
water Jonathan turned blue with cold. He acwringing the blood out of him. And stal
ight, he too felt his bathe was spoilt. He'd st
ing-room when Stanley appeared, wearing
e. He looked almost uncannily clean and bru
ing into his chair, he pulled out his watch a
minutes," he said. "You might go and see
said Beryl. She sat down at the table and po
sip. "Hallo!" he said in an astonished voice
n Beryl didn't help him; she pushed the basi
lped himself his blue eyes widened; they se
ister-in-law and leaned back.
" he asked carelessly, fingering his collar.
turned her plate in her fingers.
voice. Then she too looked up, and smiled
far as I know. I thought you seemed rather–
r opened and the three little girls appeare
dressed alike in blue jerseys and knickerer hair plaited and pinned up in what was c
airfield with the tray.
warned. But they were taking the very
ry things. "Have you said good morning to y
led themselves on the bench opposite Stanle
Old Mrs. Fairfield gave him his plate.
the boy?"
4
air, basking in the
ot?"
hed all over; it wasing up the beach,
yed in too long.
blue serge suit, a
shed; he was going
nd put it beside his
if the porridge is
ured out his tea.
, "you've forgotten
n across. What did
med to quiver. He
at Stanley. "Why
, each carrying a
; their brown legsalled a horse's tail.
reatest care. They
our father?"
and Beryl.
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"Splendid! He only woke
paused, her hand on the l
sea sounded. Through t
varnished walls and barmiddle there was an old
and a look of deep conten
"You might cut me a slic
half minutes before the co
"Yes, they're ready for yo
"Oh, Kezia! Why are you
"Me, Aunt Beryl?" Keziadown the middle of her
that every single morning,
"Why can't you eat your
are!
"But Lottie always makes
"I don't," said Isabel sma
finish it. Only babies play
Stanley pushed back his c
"Would you get me those
down to the gate and stop
bowler hat's been put. Wa
"No, father!"
"But I put it here," Stan
corner. Now, who's had i
found."
Even Alice, the servant-gi
the kitchen fire with by an
Stanley dashed into the
can't keep a single posses
"Stick, dear? What stick
Stanley decided. Would n
"Coach! Coach, Stanley!"
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up once last night. What a perfect morning
af of bread, to gaze out of the open door i
he wide-open window streamed the sun
floor. Everything on the table flashed analad bowl filled with yellow and red nastur
shone in her eyes.
e of that bread, mother," said Stanley. "I've
ach passes. Has anyone given my shoes to th
." Mrs. Fairfield was quite unruffled.
such a messy child!" cried Beryl despairingl
stared at her. What had she done now? She horridge, filled it, and was eating the banks
and no one had said a word up till now.
food properly like Isabel and Lottie?" Ho
a floating island, don't you, Lottie?"
rtly. "I just sprinkle mine with sugar and p
with their food."
air and got up.
shoes, mother? And, Beryl, if you've finishe
the coach. Run in to your mother, Isabel, an
it a minute–have you children been playing
ey began to bluster. "I remember distinctl
t? There's no time to lose. Look sharp! Th
rl, was drawn into the chase. "You haven't b
y chance?"
edroom where Linda was lying. "Most ext
ion to myself. They've made away with my s
?" Linda's vagueness on these occasions
body sympathize with him?
Beryl's voice cried from the gate.
5
!" The old woman
to the garden. The
on to the yellow
d glittered. In thetiums. She smiled,
only twelve and a
servant girl?"
.
ad only dug a riveraway. But she did
unfair grown-ups
t on the milk and
d, I wish you'd cut
ask her where my
ith my stick?"
putting it in this
e stick's got to be
en using it to poke
raordinary thing. I
tick, now!"
ould not be real,
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Stanley waved his arm to
as a punishment to her.
He snatched his bowler hYes, the coach was there
at somebody or other just
way they took it for grant
take the trouble to see th
the horses.
"Good-bye, Stanley," call
bye! And there she stoo
Stanley had to shout goo
give a little skip and run b
Yes, she was thankful. In
from her room: "Beryl! H
in his little flannel coatee.
"Gone?"
"Gone!"
Oh, the relief, the differe
were changed as they call
shared a secret. Beryl wehot." She wanted, someho
There was no man to dist
"No, thank you, child," sa
boy up and said "a-goos
girls ran into the paddock
Even Alice, the servant-g
and used the precious tan
"Oh, these men!" said shewater even after it had st
good for them.
IV
"Wait for me, Isa-bel! Ke
There was poor little Lot
get over the stile by herse
she grasped the post. The
decide. And when she di
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Linda. "No time to say good-bye!" he cried.
at, dashed out of the house, and swung doaiting, and Beryl, leaning over the open gat
as if nothing had happened. The heartlessn
d it was your job to slave away for them wh
t your walking-stick wasn't lost. Kelly trail
ed Beryl, sweetly and gaily. It was easy en
, idle, shading her eyes with her hand. T
-bye too, for the sake of appearances. The
ack to the house. She was glad to be rid of hi
to the living-room she ran and called "He's
s Stanley gone?" Old Mrs. Fairfield appeare
ce it made to have the man out of the house
d to one another; they sounded warm and l
t over to the table. "Have another cup of tw, to celebrate the fact that they could do w
rb them; the whole perfect day was theirs.
id old Mrs. Fairfield, but the way at that mo
-a-goos-a-ga!" to him meant that she felt t
like chickens let out of a coop.
irl, washing up the dishes in the kitchen, c
water in a perfectly reckless fashion.
, and she plunged the teapot into the bowl aopped bubbling, as if it too was a man and
ia, wait for me!"
ie, left behind again, because she found it s
lf. When she stood on the first step her knee
n you had to put one leg over. But which le
finally put one leg over with a sort of sta
6
And he meant that
n the garden path.e, was laughing up
ss of women! The
ile they didn't even
ed his whip across
ough to say good-
e worst of it was
n he saw her turn,
m!
gone!" Linda cried
d, carrying the boy
. Their very voices
ving and as if they
a, mother. It's stillat they liked now.
ent she tossed the
e same. The little
ught the infection
d held it under thedrowning was too
o fearfully hard to
s began to wobble;
? She never could
p of despair–then
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the feeling was awful. Sh
clutched the post desperat
"No, don't you wait formaking a fuss. Come on!"
come with me," she said
all by herself. She ran b
breathing heavily.
"Here, put your other foot
"Where?"
Lottie looked down at Ke
"Here where my hand is."
"Oh, there do you mean!"
"Now–sort of turn round
"But there's nothing to sit
She managed it at last, an
"I'm getting better at clim
Lottie's was a very hopefu
The pink and the blue su
slipping hill. At the top t
who was there already.
largely with their spades,
The whole family of Sam
camp-stool and kept orde
cane with which shethemselves or managed t
down the girls' necks or t
Mrs. S. J. and the poor la
to keep them "abused an
games. Everything began
another. There were eve
with a sour little smile
fearfully for the prizes an
pinchers. The only time th
and when she undid thre
couldn't understand why t
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was half in the paddock still and half in the
ly and lifted up her voice. "Wait for me!"
er, Kezia!" said Isabel. "She's such a littleAnd she tugged Kezia's jersey. "You can us
indly. "It's bigger than yours." But Kezia c
ack to her. By this time Lottie was very r
over," said Kezia.
ia as if from a mountain height.
Kezia patted the place.
Lottie gave a deep sigh and put the second f
nd sit down and slide," said Kezia.
down on, Kezia," said Lottie.
once it was over she shook herself and bega
ing over stiles, aren't I, Kezia?"
l nature.
bonnet followed Isabel's bright red sunbon
hey paused to decide where to go and to h
een from behind, standing against the sk
hey looked like minute puzzled explorers.
el Josephs was there already with their lady
with a whistle that she wore tied round he
irected operations. The Samuel Josephseir own game. If they did, it ended in the
e girls trying to put little black crabs into th
y-help drew up what she called a "brogram
d out of bischief." It was all competitions
with a piercing blast of the lady-help's whis
prizes–large, rather dirty paper parcels w
rew out of a bulging string kit. The Sam
d cheated and pinched one another's arms–t
e Burnell children ever played with them Ke
bits of paper she found a very small rust
ey made such a fuss. . . .
7
tussock grass. She
silly. She's alwayse my bucket if you
uldn't leave Lottie
d in the face and
ot over.
n to beam.
et up that sliding,
ve a good stare at
line, gesticulating
-help, who sat on a
neck, and a small
never played byoys pouring water
boys' pockets. So
e" every morning
or races or round
tle and ended with
hich the lady-help
el Josephs fought
ey were all expert
zia had got a prize,
button-hook. She
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But they never played wi
Samuel Josephs were alw
same food. A big washh
washhand jug full of somin the evening with half
front of your open-work
their lawn. No! They wer
On the other side of the
rolled up, twinkled like s
water, filling a small buc
busy digging and Rags w
they were quite close.
"Look!" said Pip. "Loosquashed-looking boot. T
"Whatever are you going
"Keep it, of course!" Pip
Yes, Kezia saw that. All t
"There's lots of things b
wrecks. Treasure. Why–y
"But why does Rags have
"Oh, that's to moisten it,"
And good little Rags ran
"Here, shall I show you
spade into the sand. "Pro
They promised.
"Say, cross my heart strai
The little girls said it.
Pip took something out of
breathed on it and rubbed
"Now turn round!" he ord
They turned round.
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th the Samuel Josephs now or even went t
ys giving children's parties at the Bay and th
nd basin of very brown fruit-salad, buns c
ething the lady-help called "Limonadear." Ahe frill torn off your frock or something s
pinafore, leaving the Samuel Josephs leapi
too awful.
each, close down to the water, two little b
piders. One was digging, the other pattere
ket. They were the Trout boys, Pip and Ra
as so busy helping that they didn't see their
what I've discovered." And he showede three little girls stared.
o do with it?" asked Kezia.
as very scornful. "It's a find–see?"
e same. . .
ried in the sand," explained Pip. "They ge
u might find–"
to keep on pouring water in?" asked Lottie.
said Pip, "to make the work a bit easier. Kee
p and down, pouring in the water that turned
hat I found yesterday?" said Pip mysteriousl
ise not to tell."
ht dinkum."
his pocket, rubbed it a long time on the fron
it again.
red.
8
their parties. The
ere was always the
ut into four and a
nd you went awayilled all down the
g like savages on
oys, their knickers
in and out of the
s. But Pip was so
little cousins until
them an old wet,
chucked up from
it up, Rags."
brown like cocoa.
y, and he stuck his
of his jersey, then
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"All look the same way!
And his hand opened; he
was a most lovely green.
"It's a nemeral," said Pip s
"Is it really, Pip?" Even Is
The lovely green thing se
ring, but it was a very sm
V
As the morning lengthenethe beach to bathe. It was
summer colony had the
bathing dresses and cov
children were unbuttoned
the big summer hats, wit
immense shells. It was s
those leaping, laughing fi
dress and a black hat tie
The little Trout boys whi
their grandma sat with o
when she was satisfied th
The firm compact little gi
Pip and Rags, shivering, c
who could swim twelve s
on the strict understandin
at all. She liked to be left
the edge of the water, he
motions with her arms as
than usual, an old whiske
her feet with a face of hor
"Here, mother, keep those
Two rings and a thin gold
"Yes, dear. But aren't you
"No-o," Beryl drawled. S
bathe with Mrs. Harry Ke
"Very well." But Mrs. Fa
knew it.
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eep still! Now!"
held up to the light something that flashed
olemnly.
abel was impressed.
emed to dance in Pip's fingers. Aunt Beryl
ll one. This one was as big as a star and far
d whole parties appeared over the sand-hillsunderstood that at eleven o'clock the women
ea to themselves. First the women undress
red their heads in hideous caps like spo
. The beach was strewn with little heaps of
stones on them to keep them from blowing
range that even the sea seemed to sound d
gures ran into the waves. Old Mrs. Fairfiel
under the chin, gathered her little brood a
ped their shirts over their heads, and away t
e hand in her knitting-bag ready to draw o
y were safely in.
rls were not half so brave as the tender, deli
rouching down, slapping the water, never he
rokes, and Kezia, who could nearly swim ei
they were not to be splashed. As for Lotti
to go in her own way, please. And that way
r legs straight, her knees pressed together,
if she expected to be wafted out to sea. But
ry one, came lolloping along in her directio
or and flew up the beach again.
for me, will you?"
chain were dropped into Mrs Fairfield's lap.
going to bathe here?"
he sounded vague. "I'm undressing farther
ber."
irfield's lips set. She disapproved of Mrs Ha
9
, that winked, that
had a nemeral in a
ore beautiful.
and came down onand children of the
d, pulled on their
ge bags; then the
clothes and shoes;
away, looked like
ifferently when all
, in a lilac cotton
d got them ready.
he five sped, while
t the ball of wool
cate-looking boys.
sitated. But Isabel,
ght, only followed
, she didn't follow
was to sit down at
nd to make vague
hen a bigger wave
, she scrambled to
long. I'm going to
rry Kember. Beryl
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Poor old mother, she smil
what joy, what bliss it wa
"You look very pleased,"arms round her knees, sm
"It's such a lovely day," sa
"Oh my dear! " Mrs. Har
But then her voice alway
you did yourself. She wa
Her face, too, was long
looked burnt out and with
smoked incessantly, keep
taking it out when the ashshe was not playing brid
lying in the full glare of t
All the same, it did not s
stones like a piece of toss
very fast. Her lack of vani
them, and the fact that sh
Gladys "Glad-eyes," was
call in her indifferent, tire
if I've got one, will you?
white shoes, came runnin
had no children, and herfervent. How can he hav
money, of course, but eve
Mrs. Kember's husband
handsome that he looked
rather than a man. Black
player, a perfect dancer, a
in his sleep. Men couldn't
his wife just as she ignore
stories! They simply cou
been seen in . . . but nothi
Bay privately thought he'
Kember and took in the a
lay on the beach; but col
mouth.
Mrs. Kember rose, yawn
blouse. And Beryl steppe
white petticoat, and her ca
"Mercy on us," said Mrs.
http://www.katherinemansfieldsociety.org
ed, as she skimmed over the stones. Poor ol
to be young. . . .
said Mrs. Harry Kember. She sat hunched uking.
id Beryl, smiling down at her.
y Kember's voice sounded as though she kn
sounded as though she knew something m
s a long, strange-looking woman with narr
nd narrow and exhausted-looking; even he
ered. She was the only woman at the Bay w
ing the cigarette between her lips while sh
was so long you could not understand why ite–she played bridge every day of her life–
e sun. She could stand any amount of it; she
em to warm her. Parched, withered, cold, s
ed-up driftwood. The women at the Bay tho
ty, her slang, the way she treated men as tho
e didn't care twopence about her house and
disgraceful. Standing on the veranda steps
d voice, "I say, Glad-eyes, you might heave
" And Glad-eyes, a red bow in her hair ins
with an impudent smile. It was an absolute
usband. . . . Here the voices were always re married her? How can he, how can he?
then!
as at least ten years younger than she was,
like a mask or a most perfect illustration in
air, dark blue eyes, red lips, a slow sleepy
nd with it all a mystery. Harry Kember was
stand him, they couldn't get a word out of t
d him. How did he live? Of course there we
dn't be told. The women he's been seen wi
g was ever certain, nothing definite. Some
commit a murder one day. Yes, even while
ful concoction she was wearing, they saw h
d, bloody, and still with a cigarette stuck i
ed, unsnapped her belt buckle, and tugged
out of her skirt and shed her jersey, and st
misole with ribbon bows on the shoulders.
arry Kember, "what a little beauty you are!
10
mother! Old! Oh,
on the stones, her
w better than that.
ore about you than
w hands and feet.
fair curled fringe
o smoked, and she
e talked, and only
did not fall. Whenshe spent her time
never had enough.
e stretched on the
ught she was very,
gh she was one of
called the servant
rs. Kember would
me a handkerchief
tead of a cap, and
scandal! True, she
ised; they becameIt must have been
and so incredibly
n American novel
mile, a fine tennis
ike a man walking
e chap; he ignored
re stories, but such
th, the places he'd
f the women at the
they talked to Mrs.
er, stretched as she
the corner of her
at the tape of her
od up in her short
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"Don't!" said Beryl softl
little beauty.
"My dear–why not?" saidunderclothes! A pair of
somehow of a pillow-cas
waist, and Beryl sprang a
"Lucky little creature," si
Beryl turned her back and
take off her clothes and to
"Oh, my dear–don't mind
shan't be shocked like thogrimaced at the other wo
But Beryl was shy. She n
Kember made her feel it
She glanced quickly at h
fresh cigarette; and a q
recklessly, she drew on t
fastened the twisted butto
"That's better," said Mrs.
"Really, it's a sin for you t
The water was quite war
but the sand at the bottom
puff of gold-dust. Now
outstretched, gazing out,
it seemed it was the wave
"I believe in pretty girls h
you make a mistake,
disappeared, and swam a
began swimming back.being poisoned by this c
horrible! As Mrs. Harry
bathing-cap, with her sle
horrible caricature of her
VI
In a steamer chair, under
Linda Burnell dreamed t
close, dry leaves of the m
yellowish flower dropped
http://www.katherinemansfieldsociety.org
; but, drawing off one stocking and then t
Mrs. Harry Kember, stamping on her own pblue cotton knickers and a linen bodice
. . . . "And you don't wear stays, do you?" S
ay with a small affected cry. Then "Never!"
hed Mrs. Kember, unfastening her own.
began the complicated movements of someo
pull on her bathing-dress all at one and the s
me," said Mrs. Harry Kember. "Why be shy
se other ninnies." And she gave her strangeen.
ver undressed in front of anybody. Was tha
as silly, even something to be ashamed of.
r friend standing so boldly in her torn che
uick, bold, evil feeling started up in her
e limp, sandy-feeling bathing-dress that wa
s.
Harry Kember. They began to go down t
o wear clothes, my dear. Somebody's got to t
. It was that marvellous transparent blue,
looked gold; when you kicked with your to
the waves just reached her breast. Bery
nd as each wave came she gave the slightest
which lifted her so gently.
aving a good time," said Mrs. Harry Kembe
y dear. Enjoy yourself." And suddenly
way quickly, quickly, like a rat. Then she
he was going to say something else. Beryld woman, but she longed to hear. But oh,
Kember came up close she looked, in he
py face lifted above the water, just her ch
usband.
a manuka tree that grew in the middle of th
e morning away. She did nothing. She loo
anuka, at the chinks of blue between, and no
on her. Pretty–yes, if you held one of those f
11
e other, she felt a
tticoat. Really–herhat reminded one
he touched Beryl's
she said firmly.
ne who is trying to
ame time.
I shan't eat you. I
eighing laugh and
t silly? Mrs. Harry
hy be shy indeed!
ise and lighting a
breast. Laughing
not quite dry and
he beach together.
ell you some day."
lecked with silver,
s there rose a little
l stood, her arms
little jump, so that
. "Why not? Don't
she turned turtle,
flicked round and
l felt that she washow strange, how
black waterproof
in touching, like a
front grass patch,
ed up at the dark,
w and again a tiny
lowers on the palm
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of your hand and looked
petal shone as if each was
gave it the shape of a bel
colour. But as soon as theyour frock as you talked
flower at all? Who takes
wasted. . . . It was uncann
On the grass beside her, l
head turned away from h
like real hair, but his ear
and crossed her feet. It w
that everybody was down
herself; she was alone.
Dazzling white the picot
wreathed the veranda pol
flowers long enough, tim
them! But as soon as one
along came Life and one
light; she felt like a leaf.
had to go. Oh dear, would
. . . Now she sat on the
knee. And he promised,
somewhere, we'll escape.China." Linda saw that ri
yellow hats of the boatme
"Yes, papa."
But just then a very broa
house, and slowly, solem
the way he had.
"Linny's beau," he whispe
"Oh, papa, fancy being m
Well, she was married to
everyone saw, not the ev
down every night to say
he believed in people–as
could not be disloyal; he
anyone–she–was not bein
me!" He flung out the wo
a trapped beast.
http://www.katherinemansfieldsociety.org
at it closely, it was an exquisite small thing
the careful work of a loving hand. The tiny t
l. And when you turned it over the outside
y flowered, they fell and were scattered. Yo; the horrid little things got caught in one'
he trouble–or the joy–to make all these thin
.
ing between two pillows, was the boy. Soun
is mother. His fine dark hair looked more l
as a bright, deep coral. Linda clasped her ha
as very pleasant to know that all these bung
on the beach, out of sight, out of hearing. Sh
es shone; the golden-eyed marigold glitter
s in green and gold flame. If only one had ti
to get over the sense of novelty and strange
paused to part the petals, to discover the un
was swept away. And, lying in her cane c
long came Life like a wind and she was seiz
it always be so? Was there no escape?
veranda of their Tasmanian home, leaning
"As soon as you and I are old enough, L
Two boys together. I have a fancy I'd like ter, very wide, covered with little rafts and
and she heard their high, thin voices as the
d young man with bright ginger hair walke
ly even, uncovered. Linda's father pulled h
red.
rried to Stanley Burnell!"
im. And what was more she loved him. Not
ryday one; but a timid, sensitive, innocent
is prayers, and who longed to be good. Sta
e believed in her, for instance–it was with
could not tell a lie. And how terribly he suf
g dead straight, dead sincere with him! "Th
rds, but his open quivering, distraught look
12
. Each pale yellow
ongue in the centre
was a deep bronze
brushed them off s hair. Why, then,
gs that are wasted,
d asleep he lay, his
ike a shadow than
ds above her head
alows were empty,
e had the garden to
d; the nasturtiums
me to look at these
ness, time to know
er-side of the leaf,
hair, Linda felt so
ed and shaken; she
gainst her father's
inny, we'll cut off
o sail up a river inboats. She saw the
called . . .
slowly past their
er ear teasingly, in
the Stanley whom
Stanley who knelt
ley was simple. If
is whole heart. He
fered if he thought
is is too subtle for
as like the look of
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But the trouble was–here
was no laughing matter–s
breathing spaces of calm,
couldn't be cured of the hAnd it was always Stanle
in rescuing him, and rest
And what was left of her t
Linda frowned; she sat u
was her real grudge agai
question she asked and as
say it was the common lo
prove that wrong. She w
bearing. And what made i
useless pretending. Evenplayed with the little girls
through on each of those
boy–well, thank Heaven,
who wanted him. She had
that as he lay there . . . Li
The boy had turned over.
baby eyes were open; he
his face dimpled; it broke
"I'm here!" that happy smi
There was something so q
But she checked herself a
"Don't like babies?" The
foolishly at his mother.
Linda dropped off her cha
"Why do you keep on s
about, you wouldn't."
But he only squeezed up
believe a word she said.
"We know all about that!"
Linda was so astonished
That was not what she fel
. The tears danced in her
funny!"
http://www.katherinemansfieldsociety.org
Linda felt almost inclined to laugh, thoug
he saw her Stanley so seldom. There were g
but all the rest of the time it was like livi
abit of catching on fire, on a ship that gotwho was in the thick of the danger. Her wh
oring him, and calming him down, and list
ime was spent in the dread of having childre
quickly in her steamer chair and clasped h
st life; that was what she could not unders
ked, and listened in vain for the answer. It
t of women to bear children. It wasn't true.
as broken, made weak, her courage was g
t doubly hard to bear was, she did not love
if she had had the strength she never woul. No, it was as though a cold breath had chill
wful jour- neys; she had no warmth left to g
other had taken him; he was mother's, or B
hardly held him in her arms. She was so in
da glanced down.
He lay facing her, and he was no longer asl
looked as though he was peeping at his mo
into a wide, toothless smile, a perfect beam,
le seemed to say. "Why don't you like me?"
uaint, so unexpected about that smile that Li
d said to the boy coldly, "I don't like babies.
oy couldn't believe her. "Don't like me? "
ir on to the grass.
iling?" she said severely. "If you knew w
his eyes, slyly, and rolled his head on th
smiled the boy.
at the confidence of this little creature. . . .
; it was something far different, it was some
eyes; she breathed in a small whisper to t
13
Heaven knows it
limpses, moments,
ng in a house that
recked every day.ole time was spent
ening to his story.
.
r ankles. Yes, that
and. That was the
as all very well to
he, for one, could
ne, through child-
er children. It was
d have nursed anded her through and
ive them. As to the
ryl's, or anybody's
ifferent about him
ep. His dark-blue,
her. And suddenly
o less.
nda smiled herself.
"
e waved his arms
hat I was thinking
pillow. He didn't
Ah no, be sincere.
thing so new, so . .
e boy, "Hallo, my
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velvet pincushion, and a s
and another even more sp
watch to curl up in.
"Tell me, grandma," said
The old woman sighed,
needle through. She was c
"I was thinking of your U
"My Australian Uncle Wi
"Yes, of course."
"The one I never saw?"
"That was the one."
"Well, what happened to
again.
"He went to the mines, an
Kezia blinked and consi
soldier by the side of the
"Does it make you sad to
It was the old woman's t
stare down the years, as
long after they were out o
"No, Kezia."
"But why?" asked Kezia.
"Why did Uncle William
Mrs. Fairfield began cou
absorbed voice.
"Does everybody have to
"Everybody!"
" Me? " Kezia sounded fea
"Some day, my darling."
http://www.katherinemansfieldsociety.org
pecial shell which Kezia had given her gran
cial which she had thought would make a v
ezia.
hipped the wool twice round her thumb,
asting on.
cle William, darling," she said quietly.
liam?" said Kezia. She had another.
him?" Kezia knew perfectly well, but she
he got a sunstroke there and died," said old
ered the picture again . . . a little man fal
ig black hole.
hink about him, grandma?" She hated her gr
rn to consider. Did it make her sad? To l
ezia had seen her doing. To look after them
sight. Did it make her sad? No, life was like
She lifted one bare arm and began to dra
ave to die? He wasn't old."
ting the stitches in threes. "It just happen
ie?" asked Kezia.
rfully incredulous.
15
dma for a pin-tray,
ry nice place for a
nd drew the bone
wanted to be told
Mrs. Fairfield.
len over like a tin
ndma to be sad.
ok back, back. To
as a woman does,
that.
things in the air.
d," she said in an
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"But, grandma." Kezia wa
I just won't?"
The old woman sighed ag
"We're not asked, Kezia,"
Kezia lay still thinking thi
here, leave everywhere, f
"Grandma," she said in a
"What, my pet!"
"You're not to die." Kezia
"Ah, Kezia"–her grandm
about it."
"But you're not to. You c
"Promise me you won't ev
The old woman went on k
"Promise me! Say never!"
But still her grandma was
Kezia rolled off her bed;
grandma's knees, clasped
under the chin, behind the
"Say never . . . say never
began, very softly and lig
"Kezia!" The old woman
to tickle Kezia. "Say nevlaughing in each other's a
pony!" said old Mrs. Fairf
Both of them had forgotte
VIII
The sun was still full on t
and a very gay figure wa
dressed for her afternoon
it and so many that they
http://www.katherinemansfieldsociety.org
ved her left leg and waggled the toes. They
in and drew a long thread from the ball.
she said sadly. "It happens to all of us soone
s over. She didn't want to die. It meant she
r ever, leave–leave her grandma. She rolled
tartled voice.
was very decided.
looked up and smiled and shook her he
ouldn't leave me. You couldn't not be there
er do it, grandma," pleaded Kezia.
nitting.
silent.
she couldn't bear it any longer, and lightly
her hand round the old woman's throat and
ear, and blowing down her neck.
. . . say never–" She gasped between the ki
tly, to tickle her grandma.
dropped her knitting. She swung back in the
er, say never, say never," gurgled Kezia, wms. "Come, that's enough, my squirrel! That
ield, setting her cap straight. "Pick up my kni
n what the "never" was about.
e garden when the back door of the Burnell
lked down the path to the gate. It was Alic
out. She wore a white cotton dress with suc
made you shudder, white shoes and a legho
16
elt sandy. "What if
or later."
ould have to leave
ver quickly.
d–"don't let's talk
." This was awful.
he leapt on to her
began kissing her,
sses. And then she
rocker. She began
hile they lay there's enough, my wild
tting."
' shut with a bang,
e, the servant-girl,
large red spots on
rn turned up under
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the brim with poppies. O
with iron-mould, and in o
referred to as her perishal
Beryl, sitting in the windo
such a guy. If Alice had o
the picture would have be
this? The heart-shaped Fij
Alice had picked up so
together. Pity to have ma
Alice in that rig-out.
But no, Beryl was unfair
"invite" by the little boy
Stubbs ever since the first
"Dear heart!" Mrs. Stubb
eaten. You might have be
Alice did wish there'd b
having nobody behind he
someone wasn't watching
pulled up her gloves, hum
now." But that was hardly
Mrs. Stubbs's shop waswindows for eyes, a broa
STUBBS'S, was like a litt
On the veranda there hun
they'd just been rescued f
hung a cluster of sand-sh
tear apart and forcibly se
left that belonged to the
shoe that fitted and one th
something of everything.
were crammed so tight, p
from toppling over. In th
gelatine lozenges, there w
LOST! HANSOME GOL
SOLID GOLD
ON OR NEAR BEACH
REWARD OFFERED
Alice pressed open the d
Stubbs appeared. With he
like a friendly brigand. Al
http://www.katherinemansfieldsociety.org
course she wore gloves, white ones, staine
ne hand she carried a very dashed-looking s
.
w, fanning her freshly-washed hair, thought
nly blacked her face with a piece of cork bef
en complete. And where did a girl like that
ian fan beat scornfully at that lovely bright
e horrible common larrikin and they'd go
e herself so conspicuous; they'd have hard
. Alice was going to tea with Mrs Stubbs,
ho called for orders. She had taken ever su
time she went to the shop to get something f
s had clapped her hand to her side. "I nev
n attacked by canningbals."
en a bit of life on the road though. Made
. Made her feel all weak in the spine. She c
her. And yet it was silly to turn round; it g
med to herself and said to the distant gum-tr
company.
perched on a little hillock just off the rod veranda for a hat, and the sign on the ro
le card stuck rakishly in the hat crown.
g a long string of bathing-dresses, clinging
rom the sea rather than waiting to go in, an
oes so extraordinarily mixed that to get at o
arate at least fifty. Even then it was the rare
ight. So many people had lost patience and
at was a little too big. . . . Mrs. Stubbs prided
he two windows, arranged in the form of pr
iled so high, that it seemed only a conjurer
e left-hand corner of one window, glued t
as–and there had been from time immemoria
BROOCH
oor. The bell jangled, the red serge curtain
r broad smile and the long bacon knife in he
ice was welcomed so warmly that she found
17
d at the fastenings
unshade which she
she had never seen
ore she started out,
o to in a place like
ane. She supposed
off into the bush
work to hide with
who'd sent her an
ch a liking to Mrs.
r her mosquitoes.
er seen anyone so
her feel so queer,
uldn't believe that
ve you away. She
ee, "Shan't be long
d. It had two bigf, scrawled MRS.
together as though
beside them there
ne pair you had to
st thing to find the
gone off with one
herself on keeping
ecarious pyramids,
ould prevent them
the pane by four
l–a notice.
s parted, and Mrs.
r hand, she looked
it quite difficult to
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keep up her "manners." T
gloves, tweaks at her skir
understanding what was s
Tea was laid on the parl
large johnny cake that it
But the Primus stove roar
down on the edge of a
Suddenly Mrs. Stubbs wh
parcel.
"I've just had some new
me what you think of the
In a very dainty, refinedone. Life! How many ther
the light.
Mrs. Stubbs sat in an arm
astonishment on her large
on a carpet, to the left of
water-fall. On her right s
and in the background to
"It is a nice style, isn't it?
when the roaring of the Prin a silence that was frigh
"Draw up your chair, my
thoughtfully, as she han
enlargemint. All very wel
myself. You get no comfo
Alice quite saw what she
"Size," said Mrs. Stubbs.
always saying. He couldn'may seem my dear"–her
memory–"it was dropsy t
and a half pints from 'im a
Alice burned to know ex
suppose it was water."
But Mrs. Stubbs fixed A
dear."
http://www.katherinemansfieldsociety.org
hey consisted of persistent little coughs and
t, and a curious difficulty in seeing what w
id.
ur table–ham, sardines, a whole pound of
looked like an advertisement for somebod
ed so loudly that it was useless to try to talk
asket-chair while Mrs. Stubbs pumped the
ipped the cushion off a chair and disclosed a
hoters taken, my dear," she shouted cheerf
."
ay Alice wet her finger and put the tissuee were! There were three dozzing at least. A
chair, leaning very much to one side. There
face. and well there might be. For though t
it, miraculously skirting the carpet-border, t
ood a Grecian pillar with a giant fern-tree
ered a gaunt mountain, pale with snow.
" shouted Mrs. Stubbs; and Alice had just s
imus stove died down, fizzled out, ceased, aening.
dear," said Mrs. Stubbs, beginning to pour o
ed the tea, "but I don't care about the si
l for Christmas cards, but I never was the on
rt out of them. To say the truth, I find them d
eant.
"Give me size. That was what my poor
't stand anything small. Gave him the creepsMrs. Stubbs creaked and seemed to exp
at carried him off at the larst. Many's the ti
t the 'ospital . . . It seemed like a judgemint."
actly what it was that was drawn from hi
lice with her eyes and replied meaningly,
18
hems, pulls at her
s set before her or
butter, and such a
's baking-powder.
above it. Alice sat
stove still higher.
large brown-paper
lly to Alice. "Tell
back from the firstd she held it up to
was a look of mild
he arm-chair stood
ere was a dashing
n either side of it,
reamed "Sweetly"
d she said "Pretty"
ut. "Yes," she said
ze. I'm having an
e for small photers
is'eartening."
dear husband was
. And, strange as itand herself at the
e they drawn one
. She ventured, "I
"It was liquid , my
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Liquid! Alice jumped aw
wary.
"That's 'im!" said Mrs. Sshoulders of a burly man
you think of a curl of co
ground, were the words, "
"It's ever such a fine face,
The pale-blue bow on th
plump neck. What a neck
to warm apricot, and that
"All the same, my dear,"sounded like a purr. "Free
Freedom! Alice gave a lo
her own kitching. Ever so
IX
A strange company assem
sat a bull, a rooster, a don
washhouse was the perfe
noise as they liked, andfrom the bungalow. Agai
with a basket of clothes-
had a piece of candle and
crossed overhead and, h
horseshoe. The table was i
"You can't be a bee, Kezi
"Oh, but I do want to be a
with striped legs. She dre
was a bee.
"A ninseck must be an ani
"I'm a bull, I'm a bull!"
make that noise?–that Lot
"I'll be a sheep," said little
"How do you know?"
http://www.katherinemansfieldsociety.org
ay from the word like a cat and came bac
tubbs, and she pointed dramatically to thewith a dead white rose in the button-hole of
ld mutting fat. Just below, in silver letters
e not afraid, it is I."
said Alice faintly.
top of Mrs. Stubbs's fair frizzy hair quiver
she had! It was bright pink where it began a
aded to the colour of a brown egg and then t
she said surprisingly, "freedom's best!" Hom's best," said Mrs. Stubbs again.
ud, silly little titter. She felt awkward. Her
queer! She wanted to be back in it again.
bled in the Burnells' washhouse after tea. R
key that kept forgetting it was a donkey, a sh
t place for such a meeting because they co
obody ever interrupted. It was a small tin sst the wall there was a deep trough and in t
egs on top of it. The little window, spun o
a mouse-trap on the dusty sill. There were
anging from a peg on the wall, a very
n the middle with a form at either side.
. A bee's not an animal. It's a ninseck."
bee frightfully," wailed Kezia. . . . A tiny be
w her legs up under her and leaned over the
mal," she said stoutly. "It makes a noise. It's
ried Pip. And he gave such a tremendous
ie looked quite alarmed.
Rags. "A whole lot of sheep went past this
19
to it, nosing and
life-size head andhis coat that made
n a red cardboard
d. She arched her
nd then it changed
a deep creamy.
r soft, fat chuckle
mind flew back to
und the table there
eep and a bee. The
uld make as much
hed standing aparthe corner a copper
ver with cobwebs,
clothes-lines criss-
ig, a huge, rusty
e, all yellow-furry,
table. She felt she
not like a fish."
ellow–how did he
orning."
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"Dad heard them. Baa!"
wait to be carried.
"Cock-a-doodle-do!" shrila rooster.
"What'll I be?" Lottie as
decide for her. It had to b
"Be a donkey, Lottie." It
"Hee-haw!" said Lottie so
"I'll explain, I'll explain,"
round his head. "All be qHe turned up a card. "It's
and somebody else has o
yours."
"Mine?" Lottie was round
"No, silly. Just for the ga
her.
"Oh, Lottie, you are a littl
Lottie looked at both of t
play," she whispered. Th
knew what that meant. S
her pinny thrown over her
"Yes, you do, Lottie. It's q
And Isabel, repentant, sai
learn."
"Cheer up, Lot," said Pip.really, but I'll give it to y
Lottie.
Lottie revived at that. But
said; "I want one badly, to
"Here, Lottie, you can us
very wet-looking one, kn
corner. Don't undo it. I've
http://www.katherinemansfieldsociety.org
e sounded like the little lamb that trots be
led Isabel. With her red cheeks and bright e
ed everybody, and she sat there smiling,
an easy one.
as Kezia's suggestion. "Hee-haw! You can't
lemnly. "When do I have to say it?"
said the bull. It was he who had the card
uiet! All listen!" And he waited for them. "ot two spots on it–see? Now, if you put that
ne with two spots as well, you say 'Hee-h
-eyed. "To keep?"
e, see? Just while we're playing." The bull
e silly," said the proud rooster.
em. Then she hung her head; her lip quiver
others glanced at one another like conspi
e would go away and be discovered somew
head, in a corner, or against a wall, or even
uite easy," said Kezia.
d exactly like a grown-up, "Watch me, Lott
"There, I know what I'll do. I'll give you theou. Here you are." And he slammed the car
now she was in another difficulty. "I haven'
o."
e mine." Rags dipped into his sailor blouse
tted together. "Be very careful," he warned
got a little starfish inside I'm going to try an
20
hind and seems to
es she looked like
aiting for them to
forget that."
s. He waved them
ook here, Lottie."card in the middle
w,' and the card's
as very cross with
d. "I don't want to
ators. All of them
here standing with
ehind a chair.
ie, and you'll soon
first one. It's mine,d down in front of
t got a hanky," she
and brought up a
her. "Only use that
tame."
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"Oh, come on, you girls,
You've got to keep your h
Smack went the cards routoo quick for them. It wa
could do not to burst into
"Now, Lottie, you begin."
Timidly Lottie stretched o
it was plain she was count
"No, Lottie, you can't do
over."
"But then everybody will
Mooe-ooo-er! The bull
cards up.
Bss-ss! said the bee.
Cock-a-doodle-do! Isabel
Baa! Little Rags put dow
the King of Spain. She ha
"Why don't you call out,
"I've forgotten what I am,
"Well, change! Be a dog i
"Oh yes. That's much eas
one Kezia waited on purp
very red; she looked bewi
"Ss! Wait a minute!" Thholding up his hand. "Wh
"What noise? What do yo
"Ss! Shut up! Listen!" T
said the bull.
"What was it like?" asked
No answer.
http://www.katherinemansfieldsociety.org
" said the bull. "And mind–you're not to l
ands under the table till I say 'Go.'"
nd the table. They tried with all their mights very exciting, sitting there in the washho
little chorus of animals before Pip had finis
ut a hand, took the top card off her pack, ha
ing the spots–and put it down.
that. You mustn't look first. You must tur
see it the same time as me," said Lottie. Th
as terrible. He charged over the table and
stood up in her excitement and moved her el
the King of Diamonds and Lottie put down
hardly any cards left.
ottie?"
said the donkey woefully.
nstead! Bow-wow!"
ier." Lottie smiled again. But when she an
ose. The others made signs to Lottie and poi
dered, and at last she said, "Hee-haw! Ke-zi
ey were in the very thick of it when thet's that? What's that noise?"
mean?" asked the rooster.
ey were mouse-still. "I thought I heard a–a
the sheep faintly.
21
ook at your cards.
to see, but Pip wasse; it was all they
hed dealing.
a good look at it–
n it the other way
e game proceeded.
seemed to eat the
ows like wings.
the one they called
Kezia both had a
nted. Lottie turned
."
ull stopped them,
sort of knocking,"
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The bee gave a shudder.
why had they shut the doo
While they were playing,And now the quick dark
You were frightened to l
with all your might. And
were being pulled down; t
"It would be awful now,"
table, wouldn't it?"
"Spiders don't fall from ce
"Yes, they do. Our Min tolike a gooseberry."
Quickly all the little hea
together.
"Why doesn't somebody c
Oh, those grown-ups, lau
They'd forgotten about th
They had decided to leave
Suddenly Lottie gave suc
them screamed too. "A fa
It was true, it was real. P
beard.
"Grandma! Mother! Some
But they had not got to t
Jonathan. He had come to
X
He had meant to be there
up and down the grass, s
something to lean agains
again, with her little air
fringed shawl from the Ch
"Hallo, Jonathan!" called
against his breast, droppe
http://www.katherinemansfieldsociety.org
Whatever did we shut the door for?" she sa
r?
the day had faded; the gorgeous sunset hacame racing over the sea, over the sand-hill
ok in the corners of the washhouse, and y
omewhere, far away, grandma was lighting
he kitchen fire leapt in the tins on the mantel
said the bull, "if a spider was to fall from t
ilings."
ld us she'd seen a spider as big as a saucer,
s were jerked up; all the little bodies dre
ome and call us?" cried the rooster.
hing and snug, sitting in the lamp-light, dri
m. No, not really forgotten. That was what
them there all by themselves.
a piercing scream that all of them jumped
e–a face looking!" shrieked Lottie.
essed against the window was a pale face,
body!"
e door, tumbling over one another, before i
take the little boys home.
efore, but in the front garden he had come u
topping to pick off a dead pink or give a t
, or to take a deep breath of something, an
f remoteness. Over her white frock she w
inaman's shop.
inda. And Jonathan whipped off his shabby
on one knee, and kissed Linda's hand.
22
id softly. Oh, why,
d blazed and died.s, up the paddock.
t you had to look
a lamp. The blinds
iece.
e ceiling on to the
ith long hairs on it
together, pressed
nking out of cups!
their smile meant.
ff the forms, all of
lack eyes, a black
opened for Uncle
pon Linda walking
p-heavy carnation
d then walking on
re a yellow, pink-
panama, pressed it
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"Greeting, my Fair One!
gently. "Where are the oth
"Beryl's out playing bridgborrow something?"
The Trouts were for ever
last moment.
But Jonathan only answer
in-law's side.
Linda dropped into Bery
himself on the grass besi
each other well. The voiccart shook along the san
muffled as though the do
soft swish of the sea at ful
"And so you go back to th
"On Monday the cage d
months and a week," ans
Linda swung a little. "It m
"Would ye have me laugh
Linda was so accustomed
"I suppose," she said vagu
"Does one? Hum!" the "
ground. "I wonder how it'
Looking at him as he lay
to think that he was onlyhe. What was the matter
And yet one felt he was
spare penny he had went
nothing came of it all. Th
as he explained, describe
in and there was nothing
his black eyes. At these ti
in church–he was the lea
meanest hymn put on an u
http://www.katherinemansfieldsociety.org
reeting, my Celestial Peach Blossom!" boo
er noble dames?"
e and mother's giving the boy his bath. . . .
running out of things and sending across to
d, "A little love, a little kindness;" and he w
l's hammock under the manuka tree, and
de her, pulled a long stalk and began che
s of children cried from the other gardens.y road, and from far away they heard a d
had its head in a sack. If you listened you
l tide sweeping the pebbles. The sun was sin
e office on Monday, do you, Jonathan?" aske
oor opens and clangs to upon the victim
ered Jonathan.
ust be awful," she said slowly.
, my fair sister? Would ye have me weep?"
to Jonathan's way of talking that she paid no
ely, "one gets used to it. One gets used to an
Hum" was so deep it seemed to boom fr
done," brooded Jonathan; "I've never mana
here, Linda thought again how attractive he
an ordinary clerk, that Stanley earned twicewith Jonathan? He had no ambition; she su
gifted, exceptional. He was passionately fo
n books. He was always full of new ideas, s
new fire blazed in Jonathan; you almost he
and dilated on the new thing; but a momen
but ashes, and Jonathan went about with a l
es he exaggerated his absurd manner of spe
der of the choir–with such fearful dramati
nholy splendour.
23
ed the bass voice
Have you come to
the Burnells' at the
alked by his sister-
Jonathan stretched
ing it. They knew
fisherman's lightog barking; it was
could just hear the
ing.
d Linda.
or another eleven
attention to it.
thing."
m underneath the
ed it."
was. It was strange
as much money asposed that was it.
d of music; every
chemes, plans. But
rd it roaring softly
t later it had fallen
ook like hunger in
aking, and he sang
intensity that the
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"It seems to me just as im
said Jonathan, "as it alwa
one's life sitting on a stoo
use to make of one's . . . oon the grass and looked u
that of an ordinary prison
nobody's ever going to let
I'd been–pushed in, again
rate in five years or so, I
flight of flies or counting
variations of tread and so
own accord. I dash again
do everything on God's ea
like that moth, or that but
life!' I've only one nightthere, undiscovered, unex
"But, if you feel like that,
" Ah! " cried Jonathan. A
me. Why? Why indeed?
again? There's the windo
shut–is it? Why don't I fi
no time to answer.
"I'm exactly like that inwords–"it's not allowed,
flopping and crawling up
don't I seriously consider,
It's not as though I'm trem
boys. I could cut off to se
said in a changed voice,
No anchor. No guiding p
out:"
Would ye hear the story
How it unfolds itself . . .
and they were silent.
The sun had set. In the w
clouds. Broad beams of li
cover the whole sky. Ove
against it gleamed dark a
show in the sky they are
jealous God, the Almigh
remember that at His co
cold, bright angels will d
what could be explained
http://www.katherinemansfieldsociety.org
becile, just as infernal, to have to go to the
ys has done and always will do. To spend a
from nine to five, scratching in somebody's
ne and only life, isn't it? Or do I fondly dreaat Linda. "Tell me, what is the difference b
r? The only difference I can see is that I pu
me out. That's a more intolerable situation t
st my will–kicking, even–once the door wa
ight have accepted the fact and begun to ta
the warder's steps along the passage with pa
on. But as it is, I'm like an insect that's flow
t the walls, dash against the windows, flop
rth, in fact, except fly out again. And all the
erfly, or whatever it is, 'The shortness of lif
r one day, and there's this vast dangerouslored."
why–" began Linda quickly.
d that "ah!" was somehow almost exultan
here's the maddening, mysterious question.
or the door or whatever it was I came in by.
d it and be off? Answer me that, little siste
sect again. For some reason"–Jonathan pit's forbidden, it's against the insect law, to
the pane even for an instant. Why don't I lea
this moment, for instance, what it is that pr
endously tied. I've two boys to provide for, b
, or get a job up-country, or–" Suddenly he s
s if he were confiding a secret, "Weak . . .
rinciple, let us call it." But then the dark v
stern sky there were great masses of crushe
ght shone through the clouds and beyond the
head the blue faded; it turned a pale gold, an
nd brilliant like metal. Sometimes when th
very awful. They remind you that up ther
y, Whose eye is upon you, ever watchful,
ing the whole earth will shake into one rui
ive you this way and that, and there will be
so simply. . . . But tonight it seemed t
24
ffice on Monday,"
ll the best years of
ledger! It's a queer
?" He rolled overtween my life and
myself in jail and
an the other. For if
locked, or at any
e an interest in the
ticular attention to
into a room of its
against the ceiling,
while I'm thinking,
! The shortness of
arden, waiting out
. "There you have
hy don't I fly out
It's not hopelessly
." But he gave her
used between thestop banging and
e the office? Why
vents me leaving?
ut, after all, they're
miled at Linda and
weak. No stamina.
lvety voice rolled
d-up rose-coloured
m as if they would
the bush outlined
ose beams of light
sits Jehovah, the
never weary. You
ned graveyard; the
no time to explain
Linda there was
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something infinitely joyf
from the sea. It breathed
bosom.
"It's all wrong, it's all wr
it's not the setting for . . . t
Linda knew that he would
"I'm old–I'm old," intone
head. "Look!" His black h
a black fowl.
Linda was surprised. She
and sighed and stretched,careless, but touched alre
the thought crossed her mi
Jonathan stooped again an
"Heaven reward thy swe
heirs to my fame and fort
XI
Light shone in the windopinks and the peaked ma
the top step, her white pa
though she had been waiti
"Thank goodness, it's gett
Her greengage eyes opene
Presently there sounded t
enough for one to hear
stopped at the Burnells' g
Stanley was half-way up t
"Yes, Stanley."
He leapt across the flow
familiar, eager, strong em
"Forgive me, darling, for
chin and lifted her face to
"Forgive you?" smiled Li
http://www.katherinemansfieldsociety.org
l and loving in those silver beams. And n
oftly as if it would draw that tender, joyful
ng," came the shadowy voice of Jonathan.
hree stools, three desks, three ink pots and a
never change, but she said, "Is it too late, ev
Jonathan. He bent towards her, he passed
air was speckled all over with silver, like th
ad no idea that he was grey. And yet, as he
she saw him, for the first time, not resoluady with age. He looked very tall on the da
nd, "He is like a weed."
d kissed her fingers.
t patience, lady mine," he murmured. "I
ne. . . ." He was gone.
s of the bungalow. Two square patches of igolds. Florrie, the cat, came out on to the
s close together, her tail curled round. She
ng for this moment all day.
ing late," said Florrie. "Thank goodness, the
d.
e rumble of the coach, the crack of Kelly's
he voices of the men from town, talking
te.
he path before he saw Linda. "Is that you, da
er-bed and seized her in his arms. She wa
race.
give me," stammered Stanley, and he put
him.
da. "But whatever for?"
25
w no sound came
eauty into its own
"It's not the scene,
wire blind."
n now?"
his hand over his
breast plumage of
tood up beside her
e, not gallant, notrkening grass, and
ust go seek those
gold fell upon theeranda, and sat on
looked content, as
long day is over."
whip. It came near
loudly together. It
ling?"
s enfolded in that
is hand under her
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"Good God! You can't h
else all day. I've had the h
then I thought the wire mi
"But, Stanley," said Linda
"Linda!"–Stanley was ver
without saying good-bye t
thing. My confounded te
arms again–"I've suffered
"What's that you've got in
"Oh, just a cheap pair of
wearing some in the coacgot myself a pair. What ar
"On the con -trary, darlin
She pulled one of the la
turning it this way and tha
Stanley wanted to say, "I
but for some reason he co
XII
Why does one feel so
everybody else is asleep?
more wakeful, as though
new, wonderful, far more
this queer sensation that
room. You take somethin
And everything, even the
You're not very fond of y
the door opens and slamchange your shoes and d
powder your nose and of
funny room. It's yours. O
"My very own for ever?"
"Yes." Their lips met.
No, of course, that had n
spite of herself, Beryl sa
arms were round his nec
http://www.katherinemansfieldsociety.org
ve forgotten," cried Stanley Burnell. "I've
ell of a day. I made up my mind to dash out
ghtn't reach you before I did. I've been in tor
, "what must I forgive you for?"
y hurt–"didn't you realize–you must have re
o you this morning? I can't imagine how I ca
per, of course. But–well"–and he sighed a
for it enough today."
your hand?" asked Linda. "New gloves? Let
wash-leather ones," said Stanley humbly. "
h this morning, so, as I was passing the she you smiling at? You don't think it was wro
," said Linda, "I think it was most sensible."
rge, pale gloves on her own fingers and l
t. She was still smiling.
as thinking of you the whole time I bought
ldn't say it. "Let's go in," said he.
ifferent at night? Why is it so exciting t
Late–it is very late! And yet every moment
you were slowly, almost with every breath
thrilling and exciting world than the dayligh
you're a conspirator? Lightly, stealthily yo
off the dressing-table and put it down agai
bed-post, knows you, responds, shares your s
our room by day. You never think about it.
, the cupboard creaks. You sit down on thsh out again. A dive down to the glass, tw
again. But now–it's suddenly dear to you.
, what a joy it is to own things! Mine–my o
thing to do with it. That was all nonsense a
so plainly two people standing in the middl
; he held her. And now he whispered, "M
26
hought of nothing
and telegraph, and
ures, Linda."
lized–I went away
n have done such a
nd took her in his
me see."
I noticed Bell was
p, I dashed in andg of me, do you?"
oked at her hand,
them." It was true,
o be awake when
you feel more and
, waking up into a
t one. And what is
move about your
n without a sound.
ecret. . . .
You're in and out,
side of your bed,pins in your hair,
It's a darling little
n!
nd rubbish. But, in
e of her room. Her
y beauty, my little
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beauty!" She jumped off
seat, with her elbows on
leaf, even the white pali
moon that the flowers wlily-like leaves and wide-
bent by the southerly win
But when Beryl looked at
"We are dumb trees, rea
sorrowful bush.
It is true when you are b
excitement and so on ha
silence, somebody called
"Yes, I'm here. I'm Beryl.
"Beryl!"
"Let me come."
It is lonely living by one
that's not what she means.
know, who will expect he
"Take me away from all t
life, all new, all ours, fro
eat together. Let us have l
And the thought was almo
. . . "Oh, go on! Don't be
my advice." And a hig
indifferent neigh.
You see, it's so frightfullyYou can't just be rude.
stuffy like the other ninni
over people. Yes, that is f
Oh why, oh why doesn't "
If I go on living here, tho
"But how do you know he
http://www.katherinemansfieldsociety.org
her bed, ran over to the window and kneel
the sill. But the beautiful night, the garden,
gs, even the stars, were conspirators too.
re bright as by day; the shadow of the nasopen flowers, lay across the silvery veranda.
s, was like a bird on one leg stretching out a
the bush, it seemed to her the bush was sad.
hing up in the night, imploring we know
y yourself and you think about life, it is al
s a way of suddenly leaving you, and it's
our name, and you heard your name for the
Who wants me?"
elf. Of course, there are relations, friends,
She wants someone who will find the Beryl
to be that Beryl always. She wants a lover.
hese other people, my love. Let us go far a
the very beginning. Let us make our fire.
ng talks at night."
st, "Save me, my love. Save me!"
prude, my dear. You enjoy yourself while y
rush of silly laughter joined Mrs. Har
difficult when you've nobody. You're so at tnd you've always this horror of seeming
es at the Bay. And–and it's fascinating to k
scinating. . . .
he" come soon?
ght Beryl, anything may happen to me.
is coming at all?" mocked a small voice wit
27
d on the window-
every bush, every
So bright was the
turtiums, exquisiteThe manuka-tree,
wing.
ot what," said the
ways sad. All that
as though, in the
irst time. "Beryl!"
eaps of them; but
they none of them
ay. Let us live our
Let us sit down to
ou're young. That's
y Kember's loud,
e mercy of things.inexperienced and
now you've power
in her.
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But Beryl dismissed it. S
possible to think that Ber
"Do you remember Beryl
"Remember her! As if I
She was standing on the
cream"–no, black–"straw
"She's as lovely as ever,
Beryl smiled, bit her lip,
man, leave the road, step
straight towards her. He
burglar, certainly not a bleapt; it seemed to turn rig
"Good evening, Miss Ber
"Good evening."
"Won't you come for a litt
Come for a walk–at that
asleep."
"Oh," said the voice lig
everybody matter? Do co
Beryl shook her head. But
The voice said, "Frighten
"Not in the least," said sh
grow suddenly tremendou
And just as if this was quifinally, "Come along!"
Beryl stepped over her lo
He was there before her.
"That's right," breathed t
not frightened?"
She was; now she was
different. The moonlight
hand was taken.
http://www.katherinemansfieldsociety.org
e couldn't be left. Other people, perhaps, bu
l Fairfield never married, that lovely fascinat
Fairfield?"
ould forget her! It was one summer at the
beach in a blue"–no, pink–"muslin frock,
at. But it's years ago now."
ore so if anything."
nd gazed over the garden. As she gazed, sh
along the paddock beside their palings as
heart beat. Who was it? Who could it b
rglar, for he was smoking and he strolled liht over, and then to stop. She recognized hi
l," said the voice softly.
le walk?" it drawled.
time of night! "I couldn't. Everybody's in
tly, and a whiff of sweet smoke reache
e! It's such a fine night. There's not a soul a
already something stirred in her, something
d?" It mocked, "Poor little girl!"
. As she spoke that weak thing within her s
sly strong; she longed to go!
te understood by the other, the voice said, ge
window, crossed the veranda, ran down th
e voice, and it teased, "You're not frightene
ere she was terrified, and it seemed to h
stared and glittered; the shadows were lik
28
t not she. It wasn't
ing girl.
ay that I saw her.
holding on a big
saw somebody, a
if he was coming
? It couldn't be a
htly. Beryl's heart.
bed. Everybody's
her. "What does
out."
reared its head.
emed to uncoil, to
ntly and softly, but
e grass to the gate.
d, are you? You're
er everything was
bars of iron. Her
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"Not in the least," she sai
Her hand was pulled gentl
"No, I'm not coming any
"Oh, rot!" Harry Kember
fuchsia bush. Come along
The fuchsia bush was tal
darkness beneath.
"No, really, I don't want t
For a moment Harry Kesmiled and said quickly, "
His smile was somethin
terrifying smile froze her
stern garden asked her as
through and snatched her
"Cold little devil! Cold lit
But Beryl was strong. She
"You are vile, vile," said s
"Then why in God's name
Nobody answered him.
XIII
A cloud, small, serene,
sounded deep, troubled.
vague murmur, as though
lightly. "Why should I be?"
y, tugged. She held back.
arther," said Beryl.
didn't believe her. "Come along! We'll jus
!"
l. It fell over the fence in a shower. There
," said Beryl.
ber didn't answer. Then he came close toon't be silly! Don't be silly!"
she'd never seen before. Was he drunk?
with horror. What was she doing? How ha
the gate pushed open, and quick as a cat H
o him.
le devil!" said the hateful voice.
slipped, ducked, wrenched free.
he.
did you come?" stammered Harry Kember.
loated across the moon. In that moment o
hen the cloud sailed away, and the soun
it waked out of a dark dream. All was still.
t go as far as that
was a little pit of
her, turned to her,
hat bright, blind,
she got here? the
arry Kember came
darkness the sea
of the sea was a