busitema satellite vol 1 issue 3

7/29/2019 Busitema Satellite Vol 1 Issue 3

1/30

1 Monday, 20 march 2012

Busitema satellite vol1, issue 3

political issue

Chief Editor: +256-714-778-566 Associate Editor:+256-779--324-219

Namasagali campus

sportspolitics

Vol.1 issue 3

Bagdad accounts com-

mitteeCoach gets first win

TheBusitema satellite

Academics entertainment Your life and

Hiv testing

Toilet paper

on notice

board

bwire

The nobles

News bites

Women'sday blowsRcc trail

candidate

0%

muli ro francis

30%

muyagwa

frank35%

natukunda

rossette

20%

samuel s nr

15%

rcc

Drunk-ards prayer

She is probably thefirst woman to showinterest in vying forthe biggest office in

the land. Her

His the cgrc member whoheld money but cant be heldaccountable because of hisimpeccably clean image.Munyagwa is that type of

political who will

His the currentfinance though

he gunning for an

His incumbent rccand the champion ofchallenges as he ak-

ways tell


2/30



Political issue

His the cgrc

member whoheld money butcant be held

accountable be-cause of his im-

peccably cleanimage. Mun-yagwa is that

type of politicalwho will never

change to sat-isfy the whim ofa higher force

unless thatchange is on

principle. The type to press hard till the very

last day when he cant push no more. His deci-sion to stay in multi-purpose was beleagueredby many second yrs at the time they werescrambling and partitioning Bagdad. He chose

to stay and guide the young to the promisedland of campus life.

During the time of the mama generator

strike, he sat on that pressure pot as hepushed the administration to the wall. Hispain was for the suffering students who had

to suffer darkness despite the presence of agenerator. When all leaders hid behind the

rules and bureaucracy, he kept pushing forchange and not rebellion.His rise to politics can be compared to the

story of angel Gabrielle and Mary. This waswhen he was appointed the deputy rcc ahead

of hot favourites Natukunda Rosette andNakyanzi Debora. His only previous brushwith politics was on matters of principle when

feeding allawonce was deducted by 20000 bythe administration. Here he was very vocaleven doing the math on the black with the

mama dean.As a member of the cgrc he has kept his cooland refused to cross the line and rebelagainst the Rcc despite several scenarios

when mutiny and coup dtat was the best op-tion.

His the current finance though he gun-ning for an even bigger role in the next

cgrc. Having seen the current system fail

before his own eyes especially in the waymoney is channelled from the top brass in

the guild to the local representatives. Alot has happened where money has beendisbursed to the campus but his office

has been framed as the one which

took the money. Rcc will be slightlyeasy and even change may be real-

ised having worked closely with the

incumbent, i dont see him repeating thesame dictatorial and secretive style show

caused by the current rcc. His man who

deliver on his promise and is not new to

competitive politics. Last election hemoved toe to toe with Sekajugo John for

the finance office hence dont expect

words to fail him on the campaign day.

His biggest strength is his organisationalskills having initiated ERESA as an asso-

ciation of students east of the nile only

to be failed by cheap politics of Okituiand high levels of ignorance excercised

by members of ERESA about how an as-sociation is run. The following semesterhe initiated NECI alongside the likes of

magezi and papa and so far the associa-

tion is going places. Last year theypushed the sensitisation to Butaleja and

this semester they were radio spreading

the gossipke of developing with the na-tion.

Apart from that he possesses the ability

for one on one political campaign and his

faithfuls should try and forget thesmear campaign waged on him because of

the office he held.


3/30



political issue

His incumbentrcc and the

champion of chal-

lenges as he ak-ways telling mem-

bers. His goal fora return to of-fice is to do good on the many promises that

lay in wait at his desk. These promises were

not a campaign strategy for the next elec-tion but he was failed by the whole system.

His term being the very first in the newly

decentralised multi campus system of ad-ministration. He was always going to face

problems at implementation especially giventhe fact that the campus didnt have a bank

account of its own. Some of the promisesstill laying back are the guild tree project,

duo decoder, the guild office among several

pressing issues.

She is probably the first woman to showinterest in vying for the biggest office in

the land. Her inception into competitive

politics has been a slow and steady proc-

ess. Having started at the primaries bysimply voicing her opinions on issues. She

is stepping up her act and this time voic-

ing the need for the political wind toswing to the female side of the gender

divide. Last year she pulled out she was

populary deemed fit for the deputy rccrole than all the other posts. The

passlines for her deputy post was her

fighting spirit showcased against despotslike munyuli, the campus administration

and was at the fore front of namasagali's

first sit down strike over the generatorissue. Last semester along side Hazra,

winnie, and judith waged the mama gen-

erator strike

that saw thercc get em-

barrassed be-fore his boss

the guild

president and

nearly suf-fered a vote

of no confi-

dence fromhis own cgrc

members.


4/30



Political issue

candidate

0% ahabwe

raymond

27%

mabirizi

juli us

30%

bwire

mozes

25%

acheda

amos

18%

speaker

c

a

n

di

dokurut

emma

31%mpand

e

mahad

gumaadrabo

24%

tusiime

cathy

17%

welfare secretary


5/30



political issue


6/30



political issue

Rcc in hot soupAs the guild president stood with a couple of stu-dents in his hastily organised interactive meeting,everything went bizarre as students fired himquestions ranging from delayed airtime allowance,

freshers ball, mishandled elections organised bythe speaker,.However one person stood out, hostel chairper-son questioned the president about the delayedallowance and his mode of communication withthe rcc.He answered regardless the fact that he commu-nicates with the rcc, he expects the rcc to givefeedback to his fellow leaders. To which the hos-tel chairperson refuted with anger and emotionthat such has never happened at any one point.The guild president in response lost words an an-swer good enough to the hostel chairperson. Consto Wilson these are the leaders we need who calla spade a spade and not a big spoon

Allowances triple the inflationrate at namasagali as a certain fresher took a

bath for the first time in a month and broke his

timetable of spraying deodorant even after

sweating on the pitch when news trickled in that

allowances had been deposited. Another promi-

nent campus politician skipped lectures just to go

and check whether money had been deposited in

Kamuli

Rcc summon satellite

snoopsMid-morning set in as the rcc summons sat-

ellite members. He rcc speech was saying

some were biased in their analysis especially

okitwi. He complained that he was going past

ethical boundaries by breaking true news at

the wrong time. But was reminded that we

the satellite announce to the public impartial

news and they in turn make their judgement.

Girls sweat samonaProf Math concept and mr suna caused commotion

among year two. According to our snoop and

onlooker, the so called prof invited all yr1 students

for around table test ohh ba in what. . And his disci-

ples know better. In surprise all the choppers

turned up. In the process all chairs were smuggled

from yr2 to yr1. And the showy yr2 had to pant

looking for seats as kakugs was busy with his usual

stories and kb. As sunna bounced back with his bu

usual tests two yr2 gals were made to sweat of the

samona in their

hair after they

were put to

task what they

were discussingduring the test.

Busitema ranked numbertwo in Uganda and 100In AfricaMore compensation have been met than allow-ancesThe common room staff to draft own constitu-tion on how to earn income like hostel membersto create a fundHuman rights society to teach busitema uni-versity students law affairs after teachingCultural gala delayed due to financial con-straints

Toilet paper finds way

onto notice board

a trend has developed where over excited journalists are pin-

ning up hand written bulletins by the minute on any wall close to

them. To make matters worse they use paper fit to be toiletpaper or mandazi wrappers in the process making the notice


7/30



political issue

Delayed allowances

Musisi drew up a quick fire agenda to turnwhat turned into a crowd of debtors and dis-

gruntled leaders.

The agenda drew several amendments from

honourables with the election of EC beingpushed from number 2 to number 7. This was

after professional guidance from a memberof administration who proclaimed that you

cant have reactions before matters arising.He asked arising from what. Oriada the out-going Gp even took a nap after couldnt handle

the steam from house and mas soothed bymama deans motherly speech that poured wa-

ter on a congregation steaming with fire.

This was after she moved about soliciting forwords to pour in the ears of the honourablesthat were blocked by frustration of unpaidallawonces. But she risked her own skin after

she comented that 'members didnt move intoleadership to get allawonce but to serve'which saw many hands pierce guidance, point

of enquiry, point of segregation from the

honourables.

After adoption of the motion moved by hon.Lwetutte samuel it was accdpted without ob-

jection.

Kickstarting the meeting was the speaker

who presented the much sought after leader-ship training certificates from tlt. The sec-

retary then read some sketchy minutes from

the previous meetings.

Mama dean then stood and gave a soothing

speech but the most conscious was an as-surance that members had properly docu-

mented all their claims backed by properdocumentation. She even gave a step bystep procedure of how to write claims and

requisitions especially the need to appendsignatures and receipts of anythingbought. She even hinted that each campuswould have a warden to handle all the piling

claims.

Akategeka then AA then produced a pile

of documents showing the previous govern-ment having a sum of 11million. He furtherwent on to hint that the external auditor had

already written to the Gp requesting for thebooks of accounts since his term was in its

evening days.

There was embarrasmentin the taxitransporting honourablesto vote in EC. The hon. inqtn showed high levels of

uncultured embarrassingher post of gender and

culture. She kept pollut-ing the hons ears withclaims that they ate her

10k. She frantically wasseen making calls to her

partner in crime at main campus pouring mud

on the names of her honourable colleagues.What made most fan is why she was alwayson the defensive when members said she toohad got 50k excluding transport from

Masindi just to vote. Members even dedi-cated the song aniyakola sente by phillybongole lutaya with the lyric olimutufu

okunonya sente specifically describing thehonourable. Matters were later put to rest

when the hon got something to eat consisting

of takeaway pilawo and some stale milk thatmade her quiet and even starting like the

beautiful girl she is.


8/30



Political issue

Raymond; from politician to

jokerhis emphatic rise proclaims

the kiganda saying akera

mukidara siye mogole. This

was a man who had all themakings of a man worth the

title honourable thanks for

his ability to own his own

against the campus admini-

stration especially over the

Bagdad issue. His ability to

conjure up manifestos was

poetic, the dress code impeccable though with blemishes

but with a god given ear for the crying masses. Today he

looks a skeleton image of his former glory and swell.

having lost the first ballot cast elections in Namasagali by a

single vote to okitui for rcc thanks to his carelessness in

our maiden semester everything was set for him to pull off

a strong finish in the first multi campus election only for

him to pull off the mother of all dis appointments disorgan-

ising himself to the fullest by first leading a failed boycott

of the elections the followed it up with a flood of excuses

to cover his inability to pay up the registration fees de-

manded by the EC. Despite the fact that he was the first

to hoist a campaign poster on the muddy walls of Namasa-

gali. Making many believe him being more of a joker than a

politician

come this year his taken up the same character but thistime in the arms of love and seclude. He walks around with

an image of a failed dreamer who promised much but deliv-

ered nothing. Guess his profile reads he came Failed to see

and never even ever looked like conquering.

Availability vs capabilityWith the cgrc languishing in its evening years amfearing unsuspecting politicians who are hoping fora chance at paid politics to watch of their financesand set their houses in order.

First and foremost the elections take place atshort notice the constitution states two weeks af-ter voting in the ecThat means all politicians should prepare and armthemselves with passport two photographs since itsone of the basic requirements for a chance at elec-tion.Then last year we had an election where the hotfavourite to rcc Raymond failed to show up sincehad no money. And since every post comes withnomination fees, politicians should be planning with

having inflation in mind meaning adding 50 for allpost just to be well prepared. For example the gppaid up 200k should be dishing out a minimum of250k, rcc paid upto 150k last time so you shouldplan for 200kThe academic secretary forked out 80k but willprobably cross the 100k ceiling. The other postsranging from disability to sports secretary shouldpay out 50k and probably will be adjusted to 80kminimum. The common room and faculty represen-

tative staff still have a question so i suggest youdont sign up for them. So dont say i didnt warnyou or you will get stuck in the same situation thatthe current staffs are facing. So you may be capa-ble but if you not available on that day for ever

hold your peace.

BEING AUDITED;GIVING

APUBLIC SPEECH AND DEATH ARE THE

GREATEST FEARS OF MAN.cc:editor politics

Ec millions worth of allowances

excites namsagalidespite the announcement that every post will carry an nomination of

a couple of thousand shillings has not deterred the broke people to

sign up their names. This came in the wake of the speakers shortnotice visit to the campus which so he bombard by a barrage of ques-

tions at why they are paying the

money and further more to the

guild account run by the most cor-

rupt people in the land.

Those desperate for the position

were seen scrambling for the forms

and pulling away the cgrc members

with promises of heaven on earth if

they voted them in.

Hiv tests break up

familiestheir was a cold war when the vct people visited campus

leaving many families on the brink of collapse as mem-

bers feared to disclose their status to each other.

Others opted to resign love and start attending church

like they used to. The excitement was furthered when

members learnt that female condoms had been left

behind. All boys were seen scrambling to learn the

magicof how such a big thing can fit on their

gals and better still on their missiles


9/30



political issue

Somebody should clear the

dust about the 0.8 million

meant for campus general as-

sembly last semester.

It was quite shocking when satellite un-

earthed that a huge sum of 0.8m was re-

leased by the finance department to ensure

that the general assembly is successively car-

ried out in Namasagali campus. But contro-

versy (debate) still surrounds the the organi-

sation of the general assembly.

The inside story.

According to our reliable sources the RCC to-

gether with the speaker vigorously engaged

in the drafting of the budget for items such

as refreshment, lunch, campus dance and

allowances for the CGRC members. when the

satellite contacted same CGRC members

who have preferred anonymity due to the

sensitivity of the matter, they said such mon-

ies were not given to them instead they got

the previous allowance they were meant to

get .our snoops also discovered that the fi-

nance secretary of all members was not in-

volved in the budgeting process and so he is

as green as any other commoner. But when

we first broke the story with the headline ban-

ner WHO POCKETED MONEY MEANT TO OR-

GANISE CAMPUS GENERAL ASSEMBLY IN

BAGHDAD NOTICE BOARD, The speaker did

not perceive the whole story well and he went

ahead and tore down the articles .This leaves

lingering questions as to why he over reacted,

went too emotional and personal with the

satellite crew members.

According to our snoops and on lookers in

Baghdad the head of concerned students

confronted him (the speaker) andbrought him before the readers and the

press to defend his actions. This is what

he had to say.

That the satellite was bias and so was

pinning him without prove, but when

press the satellite presented the requi-

sition that was prepared he said,

That they (RCC and speaker) did not

prepare any budget but just received a

presidential phone call directive to or-ganise the general assembly. But we

still ask, what is the constitutional role

of the speaker? = (presiding over the

campus general assembly and any

other duty assigned to him by the CGRC

not issues concerning finances of

CGRC).

He also said the money was wired into the

basket account of the RCC for two purposes.

1. That 0.35million was meant for campusgeneral assembly ,but scribes still wonder

whether the items purchased were really

worthy that value?(more clarity is still

needed here (RCC) said one guild member)

2. That 0.45million was meant to pay the al-

lowances of the CGRC.But when the fire-

brand and out spoken Asasira Joseph

(Academic secretary) was consulted whether

what the speaker said was authentic this he

refuted there and then, saying the money

they got was the previous allowances and not

allowance for general assembly as stipulated

in the requisition.(The furious Baghdad ac-

counts committee asked the RCC who is yet

to provide his said of the story to clarify on

this matter also to do so)since we couldnt

reach him on one on one the satellite tried

reaching him on phone but it was showing

busy since he was in for a meeting in arapai


10/30



Political issue

RULES AND PROCEDURES OF AN OR-

GANISED DEBATE

The house shall be referred as the- august

house

The august house shall consist of;

The chair known as the right Honorablespeaker. He is law and final.

The general secretary: To jot down the

views of the debaters any other relevant in-

formation

The chief whip: To keep order in the house.

The timekeepers: To strictly keep time.

The ushers: To welcome the guests who are

the audience.

There shall be only two points i.e. point ofinformation and point of order.

The house shall consist of;

The principle debaters-i.e. the opposers and

the proposers.

The opposers-those disagreeing with the mo-

tion

The proposers-those agreeing with the motion

The audience-whom chance shall be

granted to participate if time allows.

The principle debaters must be smartly

dressed-i.e. well combed hair, polished

shoes etc.

The principal debaters shall not present

their views as points but as views while

on the floor.

Time allocation

The main principle speakers shall each be

allowed to exhaust their views for 10 min-utes at time.

Main principle speakers-ones who opens up

the debate. Usually one from each side at time.

The manor principle speakers shall each be

allocated 5 minutes.

Manor principle speakers-ones who come

thereafter the main principle speakers.

Cc: chair.

Cc: Editor Politics and administration(0781874270/[email protected]/

facebook)

So when the concerned student gave room for

questions, this what they asked the flamboy-

ant speaker.

Which month were the allowances meant

for?

Answer: I dont know

Who signed the requisition?

Answer: RCC

What is contained in the general and how do

other campuses organise their?-pending

How did you (speaker) get the money?

Answer: thru RCC.

Did finance know of all these developments?

Answer: I dont know

Below is the copy of the requisition that was

prepared and forwarded to the minister of fi-

nance without the knowledge of the campus

finance secretary (Namasagali campus).

RCC what is your

side???????????????????????????????????

Since you are back

Cc: Editor Politics and administration(0781874270/[email protected]/

facebook)
mailto:0781874270/[email protected]/facebookmailto:0781874270/[email protected]/facebookmailto:0781874270/[email protected]/facebookmailto:0781874270/[email protected]/facebookmailto:0781874270/[email protected]/facebook


11/30



political issue

The cgrc 2011/2012will go down in history as a learning curve andnot a campus representative council. Its a

group of people who stepped

into office in a chaotic wayand lived to this spirit till thevery last day.they spent

more time pointing fingers ateach other.The cgrc show

cased the highest levels ofignorance of their duties in

office. The arguments werechildish attacks on each other member for-getting their duties and instead getting stuck

in picking out articles in the constitution thatjustify their stand. Itsso embarrassing if a

welfare secretaryclashes with his rcc

over a paltry 200,000.Issues of the constitu-tion affairs were sup-

posed to be stream-lined by the justice and

constitutional affairssecretary who alsoshunned her duty andonly added her arguments when the house wasdebating about the delayed allowances. And

then the academic secretary flies aroundurging for accountability as though thats

what is needed. Were they blinded by thesmall pieces on their plates that they forgot

the whole meal in the kitchen. If the cgrc toohad a justice and gender secretary what wasrole because these matters called for her in-

volvement. No wonder this cgrc leaves withnothing to show not even apen will be passed onto the

next group and I hope theno kisanja spirit that sawthe previous set of leadersin poor head to the dust

bins is brought back forthey were an embarrass-ment to the setup.

Things we shouldn't hearin people's manifestos that

we organised a successful

campus general assembly and

we planning on an even bigger

one this year, that the new

building which is a lecture

block was sponsored by you,

that the new tv was on

bought your account, that dstv was always sub-

scribed and that you planning on getting a duo

decoder, that the campus will get a new means of

transport because even the one you got right now

is ram shackled and super old, the internet no

longer a selling point, we wont leave multi point

because they now have small rooms made out of

bed sheets and even the vc didn't come to com-

mission them, the gals will get anew hostel and

that you bring warid network on campus

JokesFatima: who is a politicianGloria: someone who talks when others are notinterestedfatuma: then who is a voterGloria: someone who pretends to be following up

something the politician is trying to direct yetthey are not followingfatuma: candidategloria: eh! Thats someone who asks a questionand answers them himselfFatima: electoral commission officer

Gloria: thats someone who tries to pretendthat they cant be bribed

Coffee spirit as tomato sauceOn womens day Bagdad caught fire when an up-

coming politician and seasoned church preacher

added coffee spirit as tomato sauce for his

food. When asked why he did this, he said he

wanted to show a difference between womens

day and that coffee sprit makes a good diet andhis dieing to do it again.


12/30



Political issue

Bus arrives for re-

cyclingThe long awaited bus or coaster that by road stan-

dards looks fit for recycling finally made it pastthe procurement process and into the campus. Itlooks like the administrators were taking notes

fromMrki-

fumba's ecology lectures and they implement the3R's of reuse, recycle but opted for the latter

when

theysentthecampusfit for

recy-cling.Drivenintothecampus

on Friday it was taken to Namasagali tc for a spinand admiration by the locals who were left withdisconnected jaws and their clothes drenched insaliva as they sung praise for the university newacquisition. Many were even heard scheduling bur-ial trips only to be told that its university prop-erty.

Sorry people the university will get you a wheel

barrow and don't forget to invite us for your par-

ties please because its university policy not we

the students.

The scorching sun re-

placed the floodsBefore and after

that nearly swept

away the bridge inNamasagali. The soil

is all cracked dotted with the burnt out bushes

and shrubs as people are burning everything to

even mango trees to get charcoal. What used

to flood into gum boots now been replaced by

dust that floods the students shoes as they

trek from Bagdad to their lectures. Those

worst hit are those who trek back to Bagdad to

eat their cp as they reach their destinationsince they reach drenched in sweat. On return

they head back for lectures feeling more hun-

gry than they left since they burn all the calo-

ries got from

cp trekking

the dusty

road to Bag-

dad that was

once flooded

with water.


13/30



political issue

LEADERS WHO DO

NOTLISTEN.

It has become a

nodding diseaseamong leaders inUganda and Namasa-

gali in particular

that when the press

swings into action to

dig out the gist of

matter leaders be-

gin to think the me-

dia is fighting per-

sonal wars.

Reliable sources

were shocked to

hear the RCC saythat some people

within the satellite

were breaching the

media constitutional

rules. Now Mr. RCC

may you in your ca-

pacity show us inthe satellite the

constitution of

Busitema satel-

lite? .Then help us

and quote for us

such articles in thisimaginary mighty

book of ours.

I as the editor poli-

tics and administra-

tion shall not be in-timidated in any way

possible with mere

words from leaders

who do not consult,

conquer and commu-

nicate to their votes

what is happening inthe university and in

Namasagali in par-ticular. I shall vigor-

ously continue to

exercise my duty of

breaking the truth

from all angles. Be it

from students or

guild leaders.

I shall exercise my

duty with partialityand integrity what-

ever the cost andwhatever the effect.

This thing of biasness

thinking is what has

cost us serious division

between the first year

students and second

year students we as

the satellite would love

to see such anti-social

behaviour come to an

end.

Leaders must be held

accountable for theirwords, movements and

actions by the student

fraternity and this can

be made possible

through the speedy

work of the satellite.

We as the satellitehave a mandatory role

and right to inform our

readers ON all issues

happening around them.

Then for responsibility

and openness you the

leader explains to us

and the students at allcost.

The editor politics and

administration would

encourage the students

to bring forward their

articles to satellite on

any burning issuearound you be it on

corruption,freshers

ball saga, forthcoming

elections etc etc.

Cc: editor politics and

administration

(0781874270/

[email protected]

m/facebook).
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14/30



Political issue

Am Idle and

disorderly

This Breakfast and

lunch and supper

man nawe salako

Ladies needed

for the vip

section

Welcomemama nurse

I hate

women'sday

Those Chapattiswere 2k eachfor general as-

sembly

Some onecall the po-

lice


15/30



political issue

I am looking

displacedNext training is to

reduce those bel-lies full of cage

food

I Wish women'sday meant men

also wash plates

Me don't havemoney for

nurses kidanzi

Even thecgrc has nomoney for

allowance

Kati why has this

truck collapsedWhat's heavy

insidethere???

How much aretshirts on

market day


16/30



Political issue

bagdad accounts

commiteeas the clockcounts down

on the cgrc'sterm in of-fice, more

and moreleaders beingput to the

wire to ex-plain how

moneys entered their officesand left without following of-

ficial documented procedure.The committee moderated bymagezi has a panel of the

most interrogative honour-able. The members compriseof Okitui who is in charge of

classified info, John a formerfinance official in govts gone

by, mabirizi julius represent

the satellite and a bunch ofex officials who chip in with

pin point and interestingquestions..

First to be quizzed was thespeaker who was put to taskhow he 800k meant to organ-

ise the campus assembly wasspent yet all students got was

a chapati,a soda and a cake

yet the assembly was meantto be covered with full lunch

budget. And the right hon-ourable didnt disappoint bysaying they bought chapatis

of up to 2k a piece because

there was no time to budgetsince they hadnt got themoney yet. He also was put totask by jose at whether he

knew his functions and roleson the campus assembly whichled to serious consultation

from the constitution.A star he is kept leaving manyquestions up to the rcc to an-swer and even refused to diea martyr when he shared a

confidential document he hadbeen sitting on for quite a

while in which the financesecretary in secrecy wrote arequisition claim demanding to

be paid 8+ million for officematerial that the sitting cgrc

had spent on during their re-gime. Some of the items werethe pink files each cgrc mem-

ber got from.The house was then ad-

journed to a future date withthe plan beingInviting the finance secre-

tary to explain what heplanned to do with the 8mil-

lion whose requisition waseven written in darkThe academic to explain why

namasagali little faculty al-

lowance and better still itcomes later than for all cam-puses and where he put air-

time

meantforclasscoordi-

natorsThewel-

faresecre-tary to

explain the tv money as wellas the freshers ball

The deputy rcc to explainwhere the accountability for

freshers ball isThe hostel chairpersons bothmale and female at where the

paraffin they get every weekhs spent and whether its

given to their lovers or notThe disability at where heput allowance meant for

combs and hair cutsThe transport secretary at

why the satellite never beenprinted and why the editorialmembers dont have their ids

yetThe secretary non-resident

to explain where he gotAmerica fromthe sports secretary at what

happened to the allowances of

students at ndejje, arapai,the sports jerseys and allow-ances for the teams both galsand boys and why he cant

name his first eleven after allthis time in charge, does heneed a sack like villas boas

Lastly the rcc to explain whyhe never calls for cgrc meet-

ings yet the constitution

stipulates monthly, the de-layed allowances.


17/30



political issue

A joke gone badI to used Hate when am in class trying to addsense to my useless head of mine and take that

as an opportunity to turn me into some kind ofmtn or airtel mast to transmit their chits/sms toand from. These ranged from love massages tochucking smses with crude language with peoplereferring to their once darling lovers to dogskind of sentiments. It even became worse whenpeople made me pass chits in class to the girl ofmy dreams and i didnt care what you were tellingher i was freaking jealousy. So one day the guy ifear who i thought was chasing my future mateasked me to pass a chit to some langi chick thatwe all knew was a mawire even though she was

bright and a good discussant. So this guy kepttearing pages and writing chits to this. To makematters worse the lecturer kept looking at me

with those i know you doing something wrongeyes. This didnt make matters any better for methe innocent party. So i guiltily opened the chithis guy had writtenlets do it again in broken english.

Looked at him once and said i wanna do thispakalast and since my newest network is orangetrying to expand and look busy in class since the

lecturer was overdosing me on sleeping pillsmashed in greedy eyes. So that day to keep thechits moving i would open and reedit them to givea new twist in the kb. Since the gal wasnt an-swering, i sent another from the same guylets do it and get into your pants.Within minutes the gal sent back a chit readingdo you know whom you talking to?

I edited to read at my place this time.After the lecture the boy coincidentally told the

gal lets go to your place to which the gal swungthe hardest slap she could master with all hermight. The impact on the boys jaw sounded soloud everything around the lecture block came toa standstill. As we watched in dismay she slappedthe hell out of the boy while accompanying it withtough words in her native Lou language.Iming i cal igwoko pe ilol wia literally meaning youlike a dog dont disturb me

In life their two

thingseither a commoner or a poli-

ticianIf you a commoner you are safe,If you a politician their two things

involvedYou either stand for an election or

notIf you dont stand you are safe, if

you standif you do their two things involvedEither complains that nomination fees are

too high or low

if you dont pay you are safe but if you pay theirtwo things involved

Either you have too much wolokoso to convince

the voters or you dont haveand if you dont have it their two things involvedEither plays clean or dirty politics, if you play

clean you safe if you play dirtypolitics their two things in-

volvedEither buys the voters through

bribes or doesnt

and if you dont buy votes your safe,but if you buy their two things involved

You either buy votes of the right people or thewrong ones. If you buy the right ones you aresafe but the wrong people their two things in-

volvedEither win by nook or crook or

lose. If you win by crook or nook

you are safe, you lose there isone thing involved

Committing suicide on a tomatoplant using a wettoilet paper.

You

Moral of the story

know the right

people whose votes

you can buy

peter: Okello is spreading propaganda about mejohn: no! That isn't true, Okello is an acholi not

a muganda


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Political issue

Cgrc

reviewA number of members are gearing fo new

roles as guild leaders but most will needto clean their corruption tainted images

starting from the very top.The rcc needs a total make over espe-

cially here and there yet there is nothing

to show for his stay at the helm of nama-sagali here and there. The job will have

to be availed to him too so he know his

specific role in the cgrc.The welfare man too must understand we

need a duo decoder not an explanation of

how the constitution do's and donts andthat in meeting its not about screaming

but making points

The academic secretary should under-stand that a budget is not an academic

report so he should adjust accordingly

because we the course coordinators needthat airtime too.

Justice and gender we know you the most

booty but please talk sense thats beyondyour glasses instead of flirting with every

dude

Hostels male why you wear your trouserfrom the back and make your katafali

look like dabo Ds and hostel not aboutswitching on and off of solar as well asdemanding for your allowance, we need

the vc to come commission our cho's

speaker we sorry for the unfortunate oc-currence of losing your shoe sole that

made you get that walking style but how

come you got nothing after kuferarin usduring bye election where did that money

goSports secretary we know you smile the

best but what happened to the player al-lowances in arapai and why did you lend

your organisational skills to your boss

Hostel female did you lose weight be-cause of the hostel duties of swindling

parafin or because you were keeping a

campus figure to please some ones eyesSecretary non-resident tumanyi those

things happen but where the hell did you

get the capital fo that kabusiness


19/30



political issue

account for since always claimed you never re-ceived any money even tho we know otherwise

Deputy rcc we all know you buzira during the

freshers ball storm but where did all that moneygo because sincerely acheda didnt get that piece

of chicken you promised

Disability we shall continue this debate once youtell us where you are disabled

Secretary how do you manage to write yet you

blind or is it a miracle from above


20/30



Political issue

Bible teaching on

politics'Blessed is the nation whose God is the

Lord, the people whom he has chosen ashis heritage . . . (33:12)

'No one can serve two masters, eitherhe will hate the one and leave the other

or he will be devoted to the other onedespise the other for you cant serveGod and money. . (mathew 6:24)

My people are destroyed because of

lack of knowledge, i reject you frombeing a present to me and since youhave forgotten the law of your God, ialso will forget your children (hosea4:6)

You shall not take vengenence or bear agrudge against the sons of your own

people that shall love your neighbour asyourself. I am your lord

leviticus 19:18

QuranDefines politics as the taking care of the affairsof the people and is an obligation upon all people.Here some quotes from Quran that can work as aset of guidelines for the incoming cgrc members

'And rule between them by that which Allahrevealed to you, and dont follow their vain de-

sire away from the truth which came to you...

(al-maidah verse 48)

the moment you abide to serve in the name of theconstitution and the students you are held re-sponsible by what rolled off your tongue and soshould be prepared to tell the voters what theynecessarily need to hear but what they deserve.'O you who believe obey Allah and obey the

messenger and those in authority from amongst

you. . (al-nisa'a verse 59)never quote your leaders in non-official forumsand duplicate what you think as official

'and dont follow blindly any information of

which you have no direct knowledge using you

faculties of perception and conception, you

must verify it for yourself for in the court of

your lord you will be held accountable for your

hearing and faculty of reasoning . . (17:36)

the court in this instance I the electorate who

are willing to stand by you in that long queue justto see you through for your actions today will beheld accountable at the end when you are handingover those offices you entering today.'Oh mankind there has come to you from your

guardian lord and exhalation a prescription for

the minds a guidance and beneficence for

those who believe... (10:57)

the electorate believe in what you promise themin your manifesto as a calling from a higher au-thority so dont let them down.

Over nite for politiciansWith the dry climate and weather has triggered the need for a

higher power to and as the adage goes/ where there is a will

there is a way. This has perfectly to Namasagali fledglings are

fast turning to the holy grail to see them through their mount-ing problems

like hiding form their discussants in Bagdad, struggling to get

girlfriends if you cant afford a cool laptop complemented by a

cooler bicycle or some heavenly facing sharp shooter for

shoes.

The trend has been pioneered by the like of mr. Bagdad in the

company of other serial believers who on Friday night can be

seen trekking to the holy place to meet blessings from their

maker.

Even the politicians have not been left behind on the overnight

trend and hoped onto the band wagon thanks to the fact that

the elections are seemingly drawing closer and so is the de-

mand for a Jesus clean image demanded for by the electorate

who wont think twice to bundle you out in a blinker of an eye.

Those in public offices like church committees have also taken

the opportunity to clean their images to wipe themselves of

Saturdays transgression with the daughters of eve. Others

seek the almighty to guide them along the temptation filled

road they will be trekking come Saturday night.


21/30



political issue

My dream cgrcis that kind to make namasa-gali start living the dreamsince the captain of the last

ship drownedhis own ship

on dry landbefo even

goin to searcc is sem-pala becaure

of his walkinstyle it becomes better whenhe got gumboots on and his an

all rounder just spot him oneday runnin down that winger

in number 7deputy is hazra not becauseshe brown and pretends she

also know how to argue. Btbecause is a buve bulaya akakorea if the gp fails to sendthat money we can send her

so she flirt him

into sensesecretary

would havebeen eseeti buthe is so globalso whe localiseit to mpom-

wenda vero because dammthis gal likes to write eventakes the pastor's sermon as

minutes becnz where two orthree are its a meetingwelfare would be deno whowants to miss the katemba

and drama his big brothershowed us imagine a candi-date who can pretend to be

taxi conductor ifthat what it means

to get studentswelfare on tracktransport and pub-

licity is bu-taleja mainlybecoz hespeak manylanguages and

knows mobhistory

finance and projects benja-

min man if the guild thosefunds all needs is the guild

account number and eve-rythng will be sorted and how

about signatureforgin as a guildproject

justice and gen-der fatuma thisgals reps the line

equality for all.For details on

her profile askachedadisability otinga his tha only

one whose chest burns and hehas no waist line thats why

his trouser stand any wheresports is adrabo emma be-cause this guy leaves andpuffs sport. He got the

physic to

scare edennot to mess

with playersallawances

periodacademicsecretary is

namirimuolivia becoz we need some onewho is focused, serious and

likes discussionshostels bagdad would beogugu becoy he never hangsat the gals cage, likes prayin

and even goes for overnitehostels multip is elungat jurtto give the opportunity to

learn to keep hisaccount very farfrom sharp boyshostel gals would berobinna not because

got a guy who iscrazy over her inbagdad but for her

humility and un at-tached

non resident movininternet because he

wont make a familyout their to embaras us

wild cardsacheda fo academicsecretary i neva

seen him early forlectures

esther fo gendarand culture typicalmangeni peter be-

cause i have neverseem him on a football pitch

but how bout a chance forchess

lukman for welfare becoz the

only time the generatnr will

be on is durin match time be-

coz the other time he be in

bagdad chillin just to see an-

other stri


22/30



Political issue

CAMPUS LIFE

As imagined earlier in life, surviving plansamong scholars keep changing as one moves

from one stage to another.

As communicated, in this article we shall ex-

plore in details how campus galz earn a living

Campus galz campus galz campus galz

They teach mathematics using all symbols

They teach subtraction of pocket moneyfrom guyz pockets, not by robbing, stealing,

or grab-bing, butjust

sweattalking ILUV U

SWEETHEART ,

scopingguyz

pieces.

Campus

galz

They

teach ad-dition of

problemsto guyz, they also include division of guyzminds, in fact sincerely speaking, guyz even

forget that where they come from, their

clans are as poor as supply.

They are as expensive as aggregate demand;

no one has and shall ever attain their riches.

They also lecture multiplication of troublebecause if you are not careful, they are so

tempting since should you happen to visittheir place ofresidence,they can easilymake you

spend more

than onemonth with

them which

also means in-creased LEAK-

AGES.

In all thesame life

carefulnesssaves your

leakages

CAMPUS

GIRLS

They do not

like to becalled girls,butonly LA-

DIES ,shouldyou call one lady you are the best friend at

the time.

When one does not have money, that causes

loss of appetite. But should you sponsor herfor ameal she leaves nothing with a lot of

pollution this leaves guys wonder.

When she wants to talj to you she beeps, I

wonder they generally rarely call.should you

call one she puts you on conference and theyspeak endlessly .Tjis too worries the af-

fected party so much.

Beyond this about campus girls, I shal notreaveal because they may be offended the

more.

CHAPTER TWO

HOW DO CAMPUS BOYS SAVE?

CAMPUS BOYS!They dont want to be called boys but only

gentle men even when one is not fit-ting.Ladies feel their beloved one belittled

when called a boy.

Should you call him boy when the babe is

near ,receiving a slap from the babe is abso-

lutely hopeful

Campus boys rarely sleep and babes often

wonder about this.But what causes amuse-ment about these boys is the way they save,

Listen


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political issue

but when a babe sponsors he crushes it all

and nearly asks for more. This worries babes

so much.

When a babe asks for an outing, he proposesto have it at the river bank,I dont know what

they always go to do but all the same,at theriver side nothing much is sold such as chips ,

chicken,coke.

Dont first wonder about this it is one way of

SAVING

Campus boys

They are graduates in thinking, should a babevisit him where he puts up,he does not buy a

chair they claim its expensive.

They lay their beds well, WHY?

Laying abed well is cheaper than buying a

chair ,this too saves expenditure

At campus a guy without a babe makes noise

should he get one that is the end of it all.

A guy without money is always in the li-brary ,babes wonder whether they under-

stand what they are ever reading!

A guy who has missed a meal visits the ladieshostels. Might this be another way of savingyou will help to investigate about this it seri-

ously pains those who are visited.

Campus boys

A guy with little money either hurries to thehotel or goes late dont wonder why ,it is a

way of saving. When he goes early or late heis in position to ask for KIKOMANDO/

BALUGU/ENDAGU.

Should he meet babes at the food joint hefirst looks around at what they are eatingand then asks for what is not there for ex-ample At Namasagali, macaroni is America in

Uganda it is what he asks for. This is another

way of SAVING.

Beyond this I am sorry I cant explore much

about boys.

CHAPTER THREE

WASHING BEDSHEETS

When a campus guy claimes he doest bor-

row wait at the point of intersection of rainand washing bed sheets .In reality, to fit insociety at campus if you cannot buy pleasedont fail to borrow. The author narrates to

you a story of what happened when rain in-tercepted some guys programme.

A PERSON YOU MAY KNOW

This guy could not borrow, when he could seeanother borrowing, he would call the latterthe way he imagines, but one day very early inthe morning nature showed signs of shining

he was tempted to wash bed sheets with a lotof WOLOKOSO claiming his assumed na-

ture of looking wordy brave ,would make himAmerica on planet campus. After washing allthe bed sheets blanket ,jacket and all his be-

longings he left for an unknown mission .whilethere it started raining cats and dogs where

he was he could not help coming and he couldnot call anybody because there was no net-work. As if they had had their meeting with

rain which looked as if it had not ended well ,rain showered his clothes beyond imagina-

tionSnoops reveal that when he saw it beginningto rain he hurriedly left the babe in absolute

situations and the babe got bothered andcursed herself not to ever come back to him

snoops secretly reveal.

He found the clothes more wet than when

they were being washed, he couldnt also

avoid missing his meals .imagine.

The guy started panting like a resting dog,kneeling humbly like a born again Christian infront of a pastor in a born again church ,whathe couldnt say was LOOK AT ME OH GOD

,But really looked one who was praying.

Everybody looked at him, he could not

help himself begging.

Beyond this stay waiting from our nearby

observer.Story byKUZAIFFA

pic right


24/30



Political issue

The golden olden

days; floored at

own party

its a number but growing big day after day.They were the day7 which became monthsand now becoming years since one wished to

fly out of high school but hey! They wereschool days which bring back memories and

those very baaaad days which tarnish the

memories.

To know that was a cool day screaming couldbe the order of the day, clean corridors, hos-

tels, classes, main hall blah blah ' mean cleaneverything. Excitment beaming on every galsface, just a glance on one could show moving

up and down all dressed up to kill in their sun-day best was always a sunday, there was a

mission team coming to fellowship with the

gals brought excitment because of the coolsguys who would come along the band. I mean

piano, guitar and all those things, making new

friends and also these missis were mostly

from university and certain institutes ofhigher learnin ro gals wanted to gain the egoof talking to the then campusers exchangecontacts and jazz their friends back in the

hostels later that evening. At the end of theday one could cleary understand and groupclasses of gals according to their motive7 for

attending church. Those who went to havefun looking at the guys, dancing at the musicplayem, making friends, the screaming on topof their voices and moving up and down all in

the name of having fun.

Those who went to pray could talk of how thesongs that moved them, how they were

blessed by the word, scripures whose mean-

ing was known before.

Saturdays were the most interesting, theywere if one of of those gents school was


25/30



political issue

dday started with bits of excitement which

elevated as the musician came right through

the gate down the main hall, gals screamingat whatever the dude says and that contin-ued till the end of the shnw where the guests

were escorted to the gate. Acceptance is notalways approval, gals took their time, you

know

'looking great'

to be accepted but at the end of the day notapproved, it reminds me of a scenario where

a known musician was to come and one missFlo claimr to know this guy, so she promotesthe show selling tickets making arrange-

ments. Everythin for the show to be great.

On d-day the long awaited dude comes miss

Flo at the entrance ushering gals in tellingthem how great the show is to be tellin

friends how she's to benefit from the show.At the door way she was ushering more gals

and blocking those who always peep throughthe window till the show comes to a halt. In-terestingly as the dude comes out gals keep

fighting and dieing to hold and talk to himg

mean while miss Flo is at the crowded doorway hopefully anticipating with alot of faithbelieving and patiently waithng for the dude

tn come out for a talk or something like that.

After a long struggle he comes out and alleyes turn on miss Flo and thd dude but heinstead ignores her.He rushes to his beamer.

In tryin to grab his hand miss Flo obeys thegravity law at an angle 180 down the groundin the next half a second she is what a blastthe rest of the time what you may know isthat wasnt a cool day for her instead bad

day. Indeed bad days tarnish memorier butone has to always laugh the off. That was the

in my lovely school wanyange gals but this is

me now here. . .till then

The writer in pictures toady

vero

VMAS


26/30



Political issue

womens day blows

the time check was 4am when a bunch of campus students were slowly

but steadily taking their sleepy drank heads back to their hands wereambushed and thoroughly beaten by jealousy local dudes who were high

on weed.

The group comprising party animals were trekking from unique pubafter pataking of womens day/campus nite dance organised to cele-

brate girl power the namasagali way. At the bar their swag hadsprayed they had worked on all the gals at the bar to the extent were

beggin the campusers to escort them home just to feel the magic ofsleeping with a campusers. This didnt go down well with the local dudes

who instead plotted revenge and ambushed the swaggerific campusers.The group consisted of four dudes who were escorting the gals along

the budumbura route from tc and was led by xxx who got his tipsy

head punched out at the junction as you move from tc to Bagdad. Thisincident made the group split up with yyy moving towards pastors home

while zzz sprinted back to the bar to call the bar owned xyz. The barowner xyz then picked up an enkoni after hearing the screams from

zzz that xxx was lieing dead on the ground after getting punched byhis assailants. On getting his senses back, xxx sprinted to the namasa-

gali police to pick a bunch of officers to arrest the night goons.Xyz on arrival hit one of the assailants with his enkoni on the headafter he got him trying to rape one of the girls. Moral of the story is

dont walk around alone along the lonely paths of namasagali because

death is lurking in those bushes and poverty is itching every ones

pocket. This because xxx had 50000 but woke up with nothing in his

pockets.

Based on true story.

THE PRESIDENT PRAISES WOMEN FOR THEIR

GREAT CONTRIBUTIONOUR GREAT ANALYSTS WHO WERE BOTH ON RADIO

AND PHONE TAPED THE PRESIDENTIAL SPEECH INNEBBI DISTRICT WERE THE NATIONAL CELEBRATION

WAS HELD ON THE THEME CONNECTING GIRLES IN-

SPIRING THE FUTURE. THE FOLLOWING KEY POINTS

WERE EXTRACTED FROM HIS SPEECH.

THAT WOMN ARE INSTRUMENTS OF CHANGE:

THAT WOMEN ARE GIFTED WITH NEGOTIATION SKILLS

AND SO CAN UP LIFT THE ECONOMY:

THAT WOMEN ARE INSTRUMENTS OF INFLUENCE.

THAT WOMEN HAVE PLAYED AGREATER ROLE IN LEAD-

ERSHIP TRANSFORMATION IN THE COUNTRY. EG REB-

BECA KADAGA,MUSISI JENNIFER,SYDA BUMBA,,JANET

KATAHA MUSEVENI,ALICE ALASO,SALAAMU

MUSUMBA.ETC ETC:::::::THE PRESIDENT ALSO GAVE

OUT MEDOLS TO 71 WOMEN WHO HAVE CHAMPIONED

DEVELOPMENT IN VARIOUS SECTORS OF THE ECON-

OMY.HOWEVR HE BLASTED MEN WHO ABANDON THEIR

FAMILIES AND EXPRESSED CONCERN OVER GENDER

BASED VIOLENCE.THANKS SEVO FOR EMANICIPATING

WOMEN.ANALYSIS:

Drunkards prayerOur breweries

who are at portbell

thy bell comethy will be alone in beer

stories in namasagali

as it is alone in Unique pubforgive us non drinkers

forbid us from drinking

mineral water

but deliver us to the nearestGESA

fill our glasses with booze

forever and ever

Amen by Eseeti isaac

What type of boys gossip?Gossip in my understanding is persis-tent talking mostly on the negative as-pects of something or over exaherating

the aspects of some people. This is aculture of mostly women or high schoolgirls. Afew boys have also been incorpo-rated into this tradition or culture ofwomen as this constitution freely allowsequal rightsboys who are eager to get a lover spendtheir leisurd time gossiping.If a boy is jealous of a friends relation-ship the end result is gossip.Boys who have many sisters who aredeep rooted in this culture of gossip

automatically develop this evil culture.over social boys also spend alot of timegossiping cause they at times lack jazz.

Talkative boys they spend less timemum.If a boy is bored he might be temptedto gossip.Last category are those who find them-selves in this conversation of involvethemselves without actually knowingthe topic.

By mukhone


27/30



political issue

Bwirefavorite movies nigerianqoute. What a person needs is not moneybut the idea for which he is to use themoneycrush. Omotola jekeinde nigerian actressgals. Ladies are the litmus test for the de-

gree of responsibility of a manpla

Quotes'i signed for months i dont know' when asked about all-lowance'i can say a chapatii was 2k' when asked about generalassembly accountability'man eateth where he worketh' at naboth'how you count two without counting one' about pendingcases of money swindking in cgrc

'so you querrellin . . . . .so the question' at Jose'am not going to teach that person because am thatperson' about whether he will stand for speaker agin'waliwo agana sente' about people who say his corrupt

'you cant prepare a budget before you get the money'about general assembly money

Favorite sport swimmingupcoming campaigns wants to be the speaker

favorite car hummersong mulungi: cris evans

clothes indian suitson love: love is a curse from God

gadget: ipod

type of galfrend he wants is the party typefuture dream: MP Busia municipality

destination: Barbadosidol: Martin luther king jr

5 words: brown gentle humorous affectionatelyresponsible


28/30



Political issue

Drama ensued during the game between college and uni-

versity when a boy lost his walkin style after starin at a

campus babes well shaped behind. Havin stood behind

the gal for a longtime, the boy couldnt contain the

erection no more and when it was time to walk on, he

adjusted and started to walk like he was limping.

Thanks to the magic of ebintu

Man u 0-0 arsenalMan u and arsenal may be worlds apart in the epl butthere is little to separate their fans down here playingon namasagali grass. The match played over two legs at

old namasagali and with extra time inclusive ended in astalement with neither team failing to get the betterof the other.Having played out a goalless first leg, the second leg

was thought to be the title but arsene wenger's resil-ient students held on.The well facilated game kicked off with djourou muliroin an attacking position alongside ramsey dean in mid-field and the setup was summed by chamack raymond inthe holding position.These met stubborn resistance from fergies fledglingscaptained by otinga evra, kiyemba berbatov who puttogether better passes with their mouths than theirlegs. The competition was stiff despite the notableabsence of Em're song who was on private leave and

our dear rcc who was on issues of signing for extra al-lowances.Having dragged on for 180 mins with no clear winnerthe game rolled into extra time. The first of its kind innamasagali since the floods that whipped the paint offnamasagali college buildings.Still the goals failed to flow as arsenal fans under themuyaye guardianship failed to show case the kawowothats kept them in mid table mediocrity in the epl andthe man u fans were no better off despite having the

bulk of the first team eleven hence showing that nama-sagali problems run skin deep.

Union boss flees with few

shillingsThe games union boss has fled his course.Sources spill that having created complexissues around him; he opted for suicide and

quit the university. He is reported to haverun off with amount of moneys amounting toa tune of 800k from the games union basketof account.According to the guild president whenquizzed about the whereabouts of this hon-ourable his quoted to have said this,The fellow was meant to organise a tourneyto take place at Ndejje University butgreed couldnt allow him this. So he decidedto jog with the coins meant to facilitate

football, wood ball netball and basketballgallant lovers of busitema university.The fallen boss was so stressed that hecould not contain the stress and hence de-cided to flee. Comments to emanating fromthe local resident sports seem to prove theguild presidents allegations as spot on as heeven mentions that the boss biggest hasbeen love for money and pretty ladies willingto serve him ebintu. Atyenero the fallen

boss in question couldnt be reached for histake on the above allegations despite sev-eral attempts from our staff.

THE COLLEGE STUDENTS WERE LEFT IN

BEWILDERMENT ON WHAT AHELL WAS

TAKING PLACE IN THE PITCH:FOR THEY

DID NOT KNOW THAT CAMPUSERS WERE

WELCOMING WOMENS DAYS IN

STYLE:THE HEADTEACHER WAS ALSO

PUZZLED WHEN HE SAW LADIES BACK

TYING GENTS READY FOR THE

MATCH:WHAT ASOCIALISATION INNO-

VATION THE HEADTEACHER EX-

CLAIMED..MOST IMPORTANTLY GUTTO

AND OGUGU WERE THE GOAL KEEPERS OF

THE DAY,CATHY AND WINNY WERE ON

DEFENCE LINE,MIDFIELD HAD JU-

DITH;ACANIT;HILDMAN;STRIKING LINE

HAD HAZRA;:::::::::::::::WHAT ATEAM

KEEP UP:::::::::::::::ANALYSIS.


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political issue

Statistics show the that a team dominated by the 2nd

year has been futile and obuto solomon failed to score

in any of the games he has played. This big contrast to

the several hat tricks he scored when versing the sec-

ond yrs. Its even more annoying given the fact that

many times the second year break up their own prac-tice schedule and when late they show no sense of ur-

gency especially muzungu. Another issue is the fact

that after 2yrs the coach still cant even name his first

team eleven yet has the gats to prepare matches for

his second team with the gals team. Lastly why does

the coach organise surprise friendly games yet its a

period when they havent trained as if he cant sched-

ule these matches yet we play against the same oppo-

nents week in week out. Namasagali boys are walkingaway from the team they have sweated for a really

long time. We have failed to win a game despite playing

an average of a game a weekend. Against even the

weakest opponents. Its made even worse because some

of teams comprise mainly of college cooks, farmers but

we fail to even get a decent save out of their goal-

keeper. What happens to all the tactics dished out at

the start of the games? Is it a case of slow learners or

basically people who dont seem to learn anything?

Namasagali boys are walking away from theteam they have sweated for a really longtime. We have failed to win a game despiteplaying an average of a game a weekend.Against even the weakest opponents. Itsmade even worse because some of teams

comprise mainly of college cooks, farmersbut we fail to even get a decent save out ofthe goalkeeper.

Namasagali campus onceagain succumbed to its usualloses in the game they lovethe most but have failed tomaster how to win a game.Having started with a ramshackled goalie and having

been pegged a goal downeverything looked flourish

when snr goalie was intro-duced at half time.To the dismay of manyfaithfuls when he concededat his first touch of theball. Making many believethat we had the goalie buthis mind was in the cagewhere he had left his wife.For he was missing thosesoft caresses and massages

on his belly. This soft goalfrom a looped shot thatmany fans were the same

medicine that fans wereconjuring up for his oppo-site number. And if youthought that goal was awake up then you got himwrong. He once again spilleda soft shot from obuto solo-

mon. This has led many tobelieve his best place is re-

tirement and next to hismukazi eating that softfood. He has conceded agoal for every appearanceand the number is stagger-ing huge number of goalsmore than the life span ofnamasagali existence

a goal down everything looked to flourishwhen at half time our snr goalie was in-troduced.To the dismay of many fathfuls he con-ceded at his first touch making manybelieve we had the goalie bit his mindwas elsewhere in the cage where he had

left his goodies. For he was missing the

soft caresses and massage on his belly .This soft goal form a looped shot thatfans were the same medicine that fanswere conjuring up for his opposite num-ber. And if you thought that goal was awake up call then you got him wrong. Heonce again spilled a soft shot from obutosolomon. This led many to believe hisbest place right next to his love . He hasconcede a goal for every appearance

made and besides the total number faroutstrips the number of games played

for the old university and the new one.


30/30

30 Monday, 20 march 2012political issue

Disorganisation of year 2 killing

the football game in namasagali.

Girls 1-3 boysThe coach registed his first win in

womens day win. Womens day gamethe pips of namasagali were treated

to. The gals dressed in their prettyall kits took on the half boys of

namasagali in a highly anticipated

womens day game. The galant aware

of their numbers but not their posi-tions had the fist bite of the cherry

when pin point shot was saved by am

idle ogugu pato. Gutto then let obuto

shot pass through her legs. This howthe game remained until john scoqed

an offside goal.

Mab julius was then warned he would

miss women day treat if he didnt

adjust accordingly.

Half time saw a change in tactics

with guuo movin to mid field anddebora moving to goal.

Kasule then scored the equaliser

through a penalty.

The boys subed in coach and bu-taleja with with hands but maybethey were better off with hands

untied.

Davies then chipped a cheeky pass

to jose who scored with the easiest

with shiela like shot.

Julius then corrected his initial shot

which had hit the post for goal

number 3

hazra pulle off some sleek movies

that left butaleja staggering forbalance. Just before sheila pulled

off a tantalising messi like run gun-

ning for the boys goal after fair playfrom jose.

Yr 2 dump foot-

ball to the dogs

Game of the month

With the rising poverty levels and the fact that the guild

is not paying the cgrc members their allowances, they

have connived with the sports secretary common to or-ganise fenne eating competition as shown in the picture

above and practice for competitors is done any time fromlunch, break fast or even supper boys are seen buying

fenne to practice.

Snr goalie opts for marriageas namasagali succumbed ro its usual loss in thegame against the college cooks having started

with a stand in goal keeper and getting pegged

busitema satellite vol 1 issue 3

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