cyber bullying

There are two ways to cyber bully:

1. Directattacks: messages sent directly to the victim.2. Cyberbullyingingroups: Using others to help cyber bully the victim, either with or without the accomplice’s knowledge.

Theeffectsofcyberbullying Even though cyber bullying cannot physically hurt you, it can still leave you feeling emotionally vulnerable and very upset. You can also feel scared, lonely, stressed and feeling like there’s no way out. Escaping cyber bullying can be very difficult. Because anyone can get access to a mobile phone or the internet almost anywhere. It can also be tough for those on the receiving end to avoid it, even in the safety of their own home.

Cyberbullyingingroups Those who take part in online bully-ing often use a group of friends to target their victims by asking them to add a comment to a photo on a blog, or asking them to forward it onto another group of friends. Sometimes, these people don’t even realise they’re actually bullying someone.

the ultimate guideCyberbullyingisanyformofbullyingwhichhappensusinganyformoftechnology–tochildrenbychildren get to know

the termsCyberbullyingChildren targeting children

Cyber-harassment/CyberstalkingAdults targeting adults

Flaming(Computer Slang) an angry, critical, or harsh electronic message, as an e-mail or message post.

Whydokidscyberbullyeachother? There are many reasons why some-one might cyber bully someone else. Some reasons can include: Anger, revenge, frustration, enter-tainment, boredom, humour, to torment, defending themselves or to remind their peers of their own social standing.

June 2009issue 3

you can confide in Childline

in this issue:Whattodoifyou’rebulliedonline

Howtoprotectyourselfontheinternet

Wheretogoforhelp

Howcluedupareyouaboutbullying?Checkoutourquiz!

Childline is33 years old this monthCheckoutournewwebsite

www.childline.giforupdates,informationandhelp

There are a number of things to think about when using social networking sites like Bebo, Facebook and My Space:

PersonalInformationBe careful what information you give out on your profile. Remember that you don’t know what your friend’s friends’ friend will do with your picture or your phone number if you give it out by mistake. Once your picture is out there, it’s out there forever and you won’t be able to get it back. Beaware that information on your profile could potentially be viewed by anyone. So if you wouldn’t be comfortable printing it off and handing it out on the street, maybe it shouldn’t be on your profile.

Chatting Thinkthrough who you want to chat to, and how many of your personal thoughts you want anyone to view. But remember, the internet is a public space. Test yourself by asking “would I want my teacher/parents/ stranger in Main Street to see this?!” If the answer is no… don’t post it!

AcceptingFriendships Ifyouknowsomeone… who knows someone… who knows someone, it doesn’t make them your friend, so think carefully about whether you want to be chatting to them and what kind of things you’re saying. Ifsomeoneaddsyou to their contact list and you don’t know them, they will be able to have access to your profile. And you don’t want that! So make sure you block them. Ifyouaddsomeone and decide afterwards you don’t want them on your list you can delete and block them too.

PrivacySettings UseyourPrivacySettings! Adjust your account settings (sometimes called “Privacy Settings”) so only approved friends can contact you. This won’t ruin your social life – new people can still send you friend requests and message you. This means that people you don’t want to see your profile can’t! Some social networking sites are really well run and the administrators will try to help you remember to keep your personal information to yourself. Others are not so good – so be careful when choosing which areas you go to.

UploadingPhotos Onlyuploadpictures that you’d be happy for your parents to see – anything too sexy to be passed round the dinner table should NOT make it onto the web, as you don’t know who could be looking at it or what they might be doing with it. Don’tpostpictures of you or your mates wearing school uniform – if dodgy people see your school uniform, they can work out where you are and find you. The more anonymous you are, the less vulnerable you are to people with bad intentions.

ContactDetails Don’tpostyourphonenumber or email address on your homepage. Think about it – why would anyone actually need this info when they can message you privately?

contacts list, so they cannot message you.

SavingConversations It’s also a good idea to learn how to save conversations. This way, if anything weird or dodgy happens, you have evidence of it and you can show it to an adult you trust, a teacher or the police.

Hacking If you think someone has hacked into your account – report it to the people who run the site. Look out for this icon on other websites. This means that you can report abuse directly to CEOP from those sites. For example, MSN Live Messenger has a tab with this icon on it:

YourContactList Make sure the people on your contact list are people you really know in person as some people you meet online may not be who they say they are.

UsingaWebcam Webcam images can be recorded and copied, and also shared with other people, so the best thing to do is not use a webcam with people you don’t know in person. Some people will try to speak to young people using IM because they have bad intentions, and they can fake webcam images and pretend to be someone else to try and trick you. If you feel worried about this, make sure you tell to a trusted adult or report to the police on 20072500. You could also phone Childline on 8008 between 6pm-10pm.

It’simportantthatifyou’reusingtheinternet,youknowhowtostaysafe.

social networking chatting Chat rooms or chat areas on websites are a great way to stay in touch and meet people. However, there are some things that you should be aware of.

Useanickname or your initials instead of your name. Consider changing your photo to a cool graphic or picture of your favourite band, that way strangers won’t have access to a picture of you.

Lyingontheinternet Even if you’ve been chatting to the same person for ages and you feel like you know them, remember it’s very easy to lie on the internet and there is no way of knowing if someone is telling the truth. Even if someone shows you a photo of themselves, this could be a picture of someone else or could be faked. This applies to webcam or video footage too; seeing a person in a video, does not mean it’s them.

SharingInformation Be careful not to share too much information with other people in chat rooms. You don’t know who could be listening in or what they might do with that information. If you wouldn’t be comfortable yelling it out in a crowded room, it is probably best not to write it in a chat room.

AdultsWithBadIntentions There are some adults who will try to get in touch with young people and children because they have bad intentions. Bear this in mind whilst you use chat areas. If anything makes you suspicious tell an adult you trust or report any serious concerns to the police on 20072500. You could also phone Childline on 8008 between 6pm-10pm.

BlockingContacts Make sure you know how to block contacts. They will not be told you have blocked them; you will just appear offline in their

You should never give out any personal

information when you’re online, no

matter who you think you’re talking to.

INTERNETGOLDEN RULES

staying safe online

If you feel anyone is being weird with you or your friends; or

if someone is bullying you on one of these sites – contact the

administrator of the chat area. If they don’t get back to you, you

might want to think twice about using the site again. You could also

contact a teacher.

If it’s really serious– like you think the person contacting you may

be an adult who wants to abuse you or your mates, report the issue

directly to the police on 20072500.

YoucouldalsophoneChildlineon8008between6pm-10pm.

Know where to go for help

Depending on the content you want to blog about, you need to decide whether you want your blog to be private or public:

Private- If you want your blog to be private remember to password protect it, so only people you invite can view it.

Public-If you want your blog to be public, make sure:• You don’t publish pictures of you or your friends • You don’t give out information that’s personal, including: private thoughts, your full name, age or address.

blogs

You should never give out any personal

information when you’re online, no

matter who you think you’re talking to.

INTERNETGOLDEN RULES

staying safe online

CorrectdestinationMake sure you are sending things to the right place and that the right person gets it.

Isitworthsending?Don’t waste peoples’ time or bandwidth with junk, chain e-mails and false rumours.

Proof-readandspell-checkyoure-mails.As boring as this may sound, many messages are never understood or are misunder-stood because people left out words, said things unclearly, or misspelled words. While your

e-mails don’t have to be formal works of art, you should make them clear.

Don’tattackothersonline.And don’t say anything that could be considered insulting or that is controversial.

FowardingmessagesDon’t forward other people’s e-mails without their permis-sion or share their personal information.

Areyouangry?If so, wait until you are calmer and then re-read the message

Don’treplytospamIf you reply, one of two things happens. (1) You either have sent a reply to a fake address they have used to send the e-mails from, (2) or you have now let them know that your address is an active one and you will receive many more messages.

mobilesgaming

Online games where you chat and interact with people you don’t know can be great - but there are risks too.

Use a nickname as your username/ character name

• Make sure you remember whilst playing, that people are not always who they say they are.

• Be careful that you don’t get tricked or blackmailed to give out any personal details like:• your IM address • your email address • your photo • your real name • where you go to school Remember: You don’t need to share personal information to enjoy the game!

Howprivateisthemessageyouaresending?Are you willing to have others read this message or forward it to others without your permis-sion? If not, don’t send it.

YourMobileNumber It’s a good idea to only give your number out to friends who you know in person. If your mobile number is given

to people that you don’t know, they may hassle you. This is why it’s also best not to put your

number on the profile of your social networking site (like Bebo,

MySpace and Facebook).

CameraPhones Whilst having a camera phone

is cool and useful, be careful if you share your photos with others. Pictures can be changed or shared around, so think about what the image is and who you are sending it to, before you press

send. Once it’s out there it’s out there forever!

Bluetooth It’s important to be aware that unless you lock your Bluetooth, anyone in the area can access things in your phone, like your contacts. If you don’t want to share this information with strangers (why would you?!), then make sure you lock your Bluetooth.

It’s also a good idea to change

your password from the default setting of 0000 so people can’t guess it.

TextMessages If you are receiving unwanted or insulting texts, you can call the

police on 20072500 or contact Gibtelecom to change your mobile number. You could also phone Childline on 8008 between

6pm-10pm.

how y0u scored

MostlyAs-notaclue! Ignoring mean or hurtful messages or other forms of cyberbullying can sound like the best option as sometimes bullies will be contacting you spontaneously and randomly. They may get bored if they get no answer, but it can allow the situation to get worse. If you are scared or concerned, don’t let the situation develop - contact Childline on 8008 between 6pm-10pm for more help.

MostlyBs-getcluedup! Reacting to a cyberbully by sending back rude messages will make the situation worse, and means that you are sinking to their level. Also, some actions like sending pictures or ignoring someone, may seem funny or harmless, but could be very upsetting for some people. You need to put yourself in the shoes of someone who is being bullied - how you would feel if you got the same treatment? If you feel uncomfortable don’t tell the cyberbully, tell a parent, teacher or even the schools’ police liason officer. You can also talk to Childline on 8008 between 6pm-10pm for more help.

MostlyCs-readtheclues! Is it still bullying when you can’t see the person that’s bullying you? The answer is yes! Cyberbullying can feel confusing and scary, so if something makes you feel uncomfortable, don’t feel like you’re over reacting. It’s always best to go to some- one older and tell them what’s happening. You can also talk to Childline on 8008 between 6pm-10pm for more help.MostlyDs-gettingthere! Sending messages that are in anyway offensive, purposely excluding someone or joining in with any form of insult are all forms of cyberbullying. People can be banned from internet and social network- ing sites for cyberbullying but this can sometimes be used by the cyberbullies to falsely accuse innocent parties. If you or someone you know is being cyberbullied, tell someone who will know the best way to put a stop to it before it gets any worse. You can call the Police on 20072500 or you can also talk to Childline on 8008 between 6pm-10pm for more help.

MostlyEs-youknowwhereit’sat! Cyberbullyng is bullying. You wouldn’t say something online or on a mobile phone that you wouldn’t say to someone’s face. Don’t help cyberbullies. Joining in, even if it doesn’t seem all that serious can add to someone’s distress and isolation. Although it seems anonymous, cyberbullying leaves traces and can lead to being banned from an internet or social networking site and to action being taken by your school or even by the police. If you would like more information, talk to Childline on 8008 between 6pm-10pm for more help. You can also contact the police on 20072500.

Remember that youcan phone Childlineeveryday between6pm-10pm on 8008 to talk about anything that worries you.

Did you know that cyber bullying has affected almost a third of 11-16 year olds at least once? How would you react? Tests yourself to see

how clued up you are about cyber bullying.

cyber-bully

quiz1.Whatdoyouthinkofwhenyouheartheterm‘cyberbullying’? A) I don’t - it doesn’t affect me B) It’s when someone is excluded from an online group on purpose C) It’s when rude, angry or gossipy messages are sent on the text or online D) It’s bullying that can be tracked because it leaves cyber footprints E) b, c and d

2.Someonesendsyouameantextonyourphone.Doyou: A) Decide to delete it B) Text back and tell them to leave you alone C) Feel confused and then save it. You’ll think about it later D) Send them a mean text back E) Immediately tell your parents, teacher or Childline

3.Someonesendsyouaspitefulmessageoninstantmessenger.Howdoyoureact? A) Ignore it and start chatting to someone else? B) Reply back to them and find out what their problem is C) Shut down the computer and hope they’ll leave you alone in future D) Report them to the Internet Service Provider E) Go to an older person or talk to Childline, and let them know you feel uncomfortable

4.Ifyoufeellikesomeoneiscyberbullyingyou,whowouldyougotoforhelp? A) No one, you can deal with it B) Get a friend to join in against them C) If it gets really bad you might tell a parent or teacher D) The internet provider or the social networking site E) Parent, teacher, police officer or Childline

5.Sometimespeopleencouragecyberbullying withoutevenbeingawareofit.Whichofthesewouldyousaycouldmakeasituationworse? A) You hear about a friend being cyberbullied but you tell them to ignore it because it’s not that serious B) Passing on someone’s pictures or details without them knowing, or even if they’ve asked you not to C) Voting for someone in an insulting online poll D) Joining in with the insults even in a small way E) b, c and d.

7.Iscyberbullyingmoreinvisiblethanfacetofacebullying? A) Yes, you often can’t tell who the cyberbullies are B) Even if everyone knows who they are, you feel more detached because you can’t see each other’s reactions C) It isn’t really but it can feel more scary because you don’t immediately know who is contacting you D) If you report the incidents to your internet service and social network providers they can locate the address the email’s have been sent from E) Cyberbullying always leaves cyber footprints. Both the person who generated the bullying messages and anyone else’s who joined in.