college students say the darnedest things
TRANSCRIPT
PROFESSOR CARSWELL’S TOP 10 MOST
INCREDIBLE, UNBELIEVABLE, SOMETIMES
OUTRAGEOUS, SOMETIMES WACKY
STATEMENTS/QUESTIONS FROM STUDENTS
10“That’s not fair!...That wasn’t on
the slide show!”
While having information provided on a slide show is undoubtedly helpful to the students as they follow along with the lecture for that particular day, it is important to remember that these are only a small part of the lecture. There is much in the way of context that is provided during the lecture about each specific point. Bottom line…if you rely on the slide shows alone for a study tool for your exams, your chances of succeeding in this class are very slim.
9
“I couldn’t hear you
during the lectures.”
If so, you need to sit
in the first few rows
from here on.
8
“Here’s my slip from the campus health center. Can I be excused from Tuesday’s class?”
People are known to
become ill during the
course of a semester. If
you are the type of
person who is prone to
getting sick (or having
your car break down, or
whatever), I would
suggest that you plan on
coming every day during
the semester, or you will
not succeed.
7
“I don’t like to speak up during class…I am a shy and bashful person.”
You are going to have to overcome this character trait in order to receive full participation credit. This class (and all other classes, for that matter) are training grounds for you to gain confidence in asking questions and being assertive. This will only help you in the working world, and I can assure you that not having this assertiveness will not help you in the long-term.
6
“I am on academic
probation, and I need a
___ in your class to get
off of it!”
If this is the case, you
absolutely need to sit up
in the front and come to
class every single day.
You may also need to
hire a tutor as well. Do
not expect me to bail you
out at the end of
semester out of mercy to
your situation.
5
“I have no idea how to take notes in your class.”
Everything said in this class from the podium is fair game for your exams and all class assignments. For that reason, I would hope that you are actively writing down notes from the lecture during the class period. If you have trouble taking notes, you should take advantage of some of the academic support options that are made available to you on campus. Otherwise, you will not succeed in this class.
4
“My team members never got in touch with me.”
This excuse is not going to fly in this class. If you are not receiving communications from your team members, YOU need to initiate contact with THEM. In the event that they are not responding to your e-mails, you need to contact me immediately and copy me on all future e-mails to the group. This may allow me to monitor just how engaged and active everybody is with their various team members.
3“Could you let me know how
to study for the exam?”
“Could you let me know how you test?”
Sometimes, these questions are code for “I haven’t come to class, and want to know the easiest short cuts to get a passing grade.” Bottom line, if you read your assigned readings, come to class every day, pay attention, take good notes, and avoid being distracted, you will do just fine on the exams.
2
“I was so close to a B, but
you gave me a B-.”
First and foremost, I
do not GIVE grades,
you EARN them.
Second, “close” does
not count in this
class…you either
meet or exceed the
standards and scores
set forth in the
syllabus.
1
“Is that going to be on the exam?”
Easily the most asked question every semester. The answer is very simple. Unless otherwise stated, you can count on the following things to be “fair game” for the exam:
*everything stated during class time
*all slide shows
*all reading material
*anything sent to you over E-Learning Commons (ELC)
SO TO SUM UP…
• If you follow these rules
of the road, you should
be well on your way to
enjoying the same fate
as this guy!