courtesy call winter 2014-15

WINTER2014/15

Vol Five No. Three

AHAPPY NEW YEAR

ToOur Members, our Patrons

AndOur Supporters

Society founded 1986 Registered Charity No. 328296MAGAZINE

ⓕ facebook.com/campaignforcourtesy ⓣ twitter.com/cforcourtesywww.campaignforcourtesy.org.uk

SHREWSBURY WIN OUR 2014COURTESY TOP TOWN AWARD

Visits by Acting Treasurer LIZ HALL and Chairman PETER G FOOTto the historic and picturesque town of Shrewsbury were enough toconvince them that it more than deserved to take our inauguralCourtesy Top Town Award. And when Liz showed the Town Council’sportfolio of stunning buildings, churches and surrounding scenery(including the beautiful River Severn) at June’s AGM the Award wasunanimously approved.

Consequently, on 11 September, Liz and Peter were Shrewsbury-bound and duly presented the new Award trophy to the Mayor ofShrewsbury, Councillor BEVERLEY BAKER, onstage at the town’smagnificent Severn Theatre. We were fortunate to be able to impose ourpresentation during the 2014 Heart of England in Bloom Awards whichensured we had a packed audience to witness the host town’s victory.Indeed, it is fair to say that Liz and Peter were treated like royalty oneach visit.

Following the success of ROBERT ZARYWACZ’s ‘Most Courteous Town’project in Ilfracombe during 2012, the opportunity to recognise adeserving town annually has now evolved. Read inside about theCampaign member who has generously donated a perpetual trophywhich is to be awarded to future winning towns.

Councillor BEVERLEY BAKER, the Mayor of Shrewsbury, accepts thenew Campaign Top Town Award trophy from Central West EnglandExecutive LIZ HALL (left) and Chairman PETER G FOOT at the town’sSevern Theatre in September. Photo: Andrew (360 Skylens Ltd.)

MAGAZINE SPONSORSHIP...This issue has been sponsored by one of our generous supporters. Her £500 gift to ourfunds is greatly appreciated by this Campaign and we are complying to her wish not to publish her name. Onbehalf of the Campaign, thank you very much, kind lady. PGF

CONTENTS Page• ANNUAL GENERAL MEETING............................... 3,5• CAMPAIGN COMMENT –

RETIREMENTS AND NEW FACES............................ 4• OPEN LETTER FROM

ACTING TREASURER LIZ HALL............................... 5• CASHING IN by EDWARD THOMAS........................ 6• DRIVING DOWN DISCOURTESY

by DAVID WILLIAMS......................................... 7• SPORTSMANSHIP MATTERS

by PAUL SMITH................................................. 8• IS TECHNOLOGY MAKING US RUDE?

by RACHEL STOKES......................................... 9• F-WORD USEAGE – article

by REV. IAN GREGORY.................................... 10• UNDERGROUND ETIQUETTE

by VANESSA BOND...........................................10• MEDIA FOCUS................................................ 12,14,15• ROY HUDD article...................................................... 16• THE AMAZING HOTELIER –

NEIL KIRBY................................................................. 17• DOUG McKENZIE – REMEMBERING

A GREAT MAN............................................................ 18• CAMPAIGN 2015 MEETING DATES AT

LANCASTER HALL HOTEL........................................20

#pleaseMAYwe have your support for courtesy?

... see page 13

Courtesy Call vol 6 winter 2014-15 15/01/2015 11:17

CHARLOTTEMARTINSThe SavvyConsultancy74 Postern CloseBishops WharfYork YO23 1JFTel: 07968 316576

e: [email protected]

ALANCOLES

6 Eden ParkLancaster LA1 4SJTel: 01524 67570


NATIONALCAMPAIGN

FORCOURTESY

CAMPAIGN

CONTACTS

Chairman/Administrator:Surbiton H.Q.Egmont House240 Tolworth Rise South, Surbiton, Surrey KT5 9NBTel: 020 8330 3707(Mon-Fri / 9.30am - 1pm)e: [email protected]

Treasurer/MembershipSecretary:12 Collington CloseEastbourneEast SussexBN20 7EX

Tel: 01323 736864 e: [email protected]

Website Co-ordinator11 Furse Hill RoadIlfracombe, DevonEX34 8HN

Tel: 01271 879100 m: 07971 176044 e: [email protected]

Twitter.com/cforcourtesyFacebook.com/campaignforcourtesy

Websitecampaignforcourtesy.org.uk

FounderREV.IANGREGORY

PUBLISHER’S NOTICEContributions, articles, reviews and letters arewelcomed, although the editor cannotguarantee to publish same. Letters, emails andmessages that are not intended for publicationshould be clearly marked ‘Not for Publication’.Restrictions on available space may alsorequire the editor to reduce or alter submittedcopy, although every effort will be made toretain its original meaning. Courtesy Call doesnot accept responsibility for loss or damage tomaterials submitted relating to magazine copyand/or any projects connected with thispublication – or for the accuracy of theinformation contained in such material.The views expressed in Courtesy Call are notnecessarily those of the editor.Reproduction of any copy, photograph orillustration from Courtesy Call and/or theCampaign’s website is not permitted withoutthe approval of the editor.

MARY DOYLE

Treasurer/Membership Secretary

EDWARDTHOMASContact: - seecolumn one

Chairman/Courtesy Calleditor

PETER G. FOOTContact:Surbiton H.Q.

Vice-Chairman/MotoringCorrespondentDAVIDWILLIAMSMBE, FIRSO

WebsiteCo-ordinatorROBERTZARYWACZContact: - seecolumn one

GILLIANROBERTS

CouncillorPETERCRESSWELL

Contact: Tel: 01638 661138

Public TransportSpokespersonVANESSABONDContact: Tel: 020 8952 7890

CouncillorLIZ HALLContact: Tel: 01981 540479m: 07771 925561

SportsmanshipSpokespersonPAULSMITHContact: Tel: 020 8567 4659e: [email protected]

Councillor/PhotographerJOHNMcKENZIEContact: m: 07929 138670e: [email protected]

CouncillorMARYZOELLER

Contact: Tel: 020 8873 1633

CouncillorANNELING

Contact: Tel: 020 8460 5788

EXECUTIVE COUNCILLORS

REGIONAL EXECUTIVES - ENGLAND

COURTESY

CALL

EXECUTIVE OFFICERS

Contact: Tel: 01342 825676e: [email protected]




SOUTH WEST

CENTRAL WESTLIZHALLWalmere,Wrigglebrook Lane,Kingsthorne,Hereford HR2 8AWTel: 01981 540479 m: 07771 925561


ROBERTZARYWACZ11 Furse Hill RoadIlfracombeDevon EX34 8HNTel: 01271 879100m: 07971 176044


NORTH NORTH WEST

NORTH EAST

WESTTIMPRITCHARD

St. Anthony’sRowberrowSomerset BS25 1QR


GREATER LONDONPETER GFOOT

Contact details asSurbiton H.Q.in column one

LADIES WHO CARE

Many more people in today’ssociety are having to care for aging and ailing parents.This ‘duty’ has resulted in our Campaign losing thevaluable administrative talentsthis year of Secretary MARY DOYLE (pictured above)and Administrator GILLIANROBERTS (pictured below).Our sympathies go to boththese lovely ladies along withour thanks for all thewonderful work they haveundertaken for the Campaignin recent years.

WINTER 2014/15Think of someone to thank




Campaign for Courtesy

Let’s have apolite intermission

www.campaignforcourtesy.org

www.campaignforcourtesy.org.uk


3Don’t miss those ‘hello’ opportunitiesWINTER 2014/15 COURTESY CALL

THE NATIONAL CAMPAIGN for COURTESY is proud to have the support of our PATRONS

OUR PATRONS

MOIRAANDERSONOBE

COLONELJOHNBLASHFORD-SNELLOBE

ANNEBRUZAC

WYNCALVINMBE

FIONACASTLEOBE

JIMMYCRICKET

DAVEDENNISON

DAMEBERYLGREYDBE

DAVIDHAMILTON

BARONESSRACHAELHEYHOE-FLINTOBE, DL

ROY HUDDOBE

DIANA MORAN

DAMEESTHERRANTZENCBE

MARY ANNSIEGHART

JUNEWHITFIELDCBE

In June, the Campaign held its 2014 Annual General Meeting at theWestminster Quaker Meeting House in St Martin’s Lane, London. It wasunfortunate that, for our first AGM to be held at this historic venue wehad to settle for a June date because the venue had double booked ourusual May date. Consequently, many members were unable to attendin June. However, our new Councillor JOHN McKENZIE was on handto take photographs and the above shot shows the attendees (from l tor front) member ROSEMARY DABBS, Councillor ANNE LING, TreasurerEDWARD THOMAS, Chairman PETER G FOOT, Vice Chairman DAVIDWILLIAMS, member JUNE BACK and Councillor VANESSA BOND. Atrear (l to r) are Councillor ROBERT ZARYWACZ, Councillor LIZ HALL,Patron FIONA CASTLE, member GAYE VAUGHAN, member OLIVIABREEZE, Patron DAVE DENNISON and his wife KATHY, and CouncillorPETER CRESSWELL.

Highlight of an enjoyable AGM afternoon was EDWARD THOMAS’interview with Patron DAVE DENNISON. There was plenty to laughabout as the Directa (UK) Limited Chairman recalled his working lifestory which ranged from show musicals production to his Vice-Presidency of Tottenham Hotspur Football Club. Now a prolific authorof humour books and an accomplished after-dinner speaker, MrDennison made our day very memorable.

Photo: JOHN McKENZIE

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4 WINTER 2014/15COURTESY CALL Life is richer with respect and good humour

is his time to go after havingserved our cause magnificentlyfor a similar period of time. Also,my good friend PETERCROSSWELL is finding hiscouncil committee work isgrowing and feels he should stepdown from his Councillor postafter the next AGM. His wisecounselling in committee andwork as our East Anglian RegionExecutive has proved invaluableover the past four years.

To lose three such keypersonnel would seem disastrousfor a charity such as ours but,fortunately, excellentreplacements have emerged andthe future for the Campaign looksmuch brighter as a result. First ofall, although we have lost one ofour most dedicated Patrons(Doug), we have gained the lovelyand very supportive FIONACASTLE OBE. New Councillorsadopted include Doug’s son,photographer JOHN McKENZIE,PR business woman MARYZOELLER and English teacherRACHEL STOKES. And, ofcourse, LIZ HALL’s commitmentto take over the joint offices ofTreasurer and MembershipSecretary from Edward, hasproved remarkably successful inimproving the Campaign’sfinancial position as well asstreamlining our membershipdatabase.

Although all the Officer postsare up for election at the nextAGM – and we welcome anymembers for nomination forExecutive Officers, Councillorsand Regional Executives – we looklike having a potentially strongadministrative team. Indeed, ourmain concern is seeking newpeople for the Vice Chairman andSecretary posts. Please give me acall if you are interested in beingconsidered for these roles.Meanwhile, thank you for yourcontinued support.

Peter G Foot (Chairman)

OUR CAMPAIGN’SSAD AND GLAD

TIDINGSI apologise to members for the

delay in publishing this issue.Very significant events have led toimportant changes that haveresulted in administrationchanges over the past two years.However, there are now goodreasons for optimism regardingthe future of our Campaign. Butfirst I must report on all thecasualties we have experienced.

We have lost the services of twoSecretaries and ourAdministrator through direct andindirect illnesses. AdministratorGILLIAN ROBERTS and pastSecretary MARY DOYLE have hadto leave their posts so that theycan care for ailing parents, whileSecretary JIM KENNEDY suffereda stroke last year which hasrendered him immobile. Earlierthis year, we lost ExecutiveCouncillor and North WestRegional Executive PHIL KING (asreported in our last issue) – adeath that soon led to the passingof his lovely wife MAUREEN. Thissummer we lost our Patron,photographer DOUG McKENZIEfollowing a sudden illness inhospital (a report on his MemorialService appears in this issue).

Meanwhile, three of our officershave advised that they will bestepping down at next year’sAnnual General Meeting.Treasurer and MembershipSecretary EDWARD THOMAS’retirement was announced in ourlast issue. Edward’s twenty yearservice on the Executive has beensuperb. Now Vice ChairmanDAVID WILLIAMS has decided it

LIZ HALL SET TOTAKE OVER

TREASURER POSTOur new Treasurer andMembership Secretary LIZ HALLis set to take over from the retiringEDWARD THOMAS at next May’sAnnual General Meeting.Currently doing a wonderful jobas the Regional Executive of theCentral West England area, Lizhas been very busy working withEdward to ensure a smoothtransfer of files and computerrecords. Indeed the newmembership data-base is alreadyin place in time for the despatchof this issue of Courtesy Call.

LIZ HALL-AN INTRODUCTION

This new campaign officer has, infact, been one of our longestserving members having joinedwhen we carried the Polite Societytitle. Born in West Wickham inKent, she was educated atBeckenham Grammar Schoolbefore studying psychology andpolitical History of Russia and theBaltic States at the College forDistributive Trades in London’sLeicester Square.

Liz worked in various travelrelated industries in London until1980, before creating her ownTravel Agency businessconcentrating on the needs ofmedical professionals – a businessshe moved from central London toBeckenham before moving to thecurrent base in Hertfordshire,where she renamed the business‘Medical Flightline’. Most of herstaff and colleagues are based inFrance and Germany and thecompany now has an annualturnover of around £3million.

Previously married, she has a29-year-old-daughter working atEssex University and two nieces-Ellie aged 29 and Rachel 24 – bothgraduates and teaching English inthe Far East. Partner Tim is anaccomplished actor and “inspired”set builder. Since moving toHertfordshire, both have becomeinvolved with the Phoenix Theatrein Ross on Wye as well as the localvillage hall theatre group. Lizuses her experience in the eightiesas a lighting designer and stagemanager of Bromley Little Theatreto mount two local productionseach year. “we’re heavily involvedand love it” Liz adds And, in herspare time (/!), she loves paintingand cooking.

MARY ZOELLER runs acommunications company basedin Epsom, Surrey and works withclients in the public, private andvoluntary sectors. Sheundertakes a full range of publicrelations activities including pressliaison, copywriting, advertising,marketing campaigns, proofreading and writing for the media.Her clients include the localtheatre (Epsom Playhouse) andThe Ashley Shopping Centre aswell as many other localcompanies both large and small

Meet new CouncillorMARY ZOELLER

New Councillor isphotographerJOHN McKENZIE


CongratulationsDAME ESTHER

Our Patron ESTHER RANTZENwas made a dame in the NewYear’s Honours in recognitionof her charity work - forfounding children’s charityChildline and for recentlysetting up The Silver Line tosupport older people sufferingloneliness. Photo: Doug McKenzie


5Courtesy - the human passportWINTER 2014/15 COURTESY CALL

OPEN LETTER FROM ACTING TREASURER

LIZ HALLDear All I have been asked towrite a piece for the “CourtesyCall” to explain why I have beenhounding you all recently by postand Email!Edward, after 12 years in the job,has kindly assisted me in takingover his duties as MembershipSecretary and Treasurer for theCampaign. This is very excitingfor me and I am looking forwardto all the interest and challengesto come.

In consultation with Edward,Peter, and others on theExecutive, I took the liberty ofwriting to you all to suggest somenew initiatives which would easethe administrative burden andraise some additional funds forour Campaign. The response wasquite stunning!

May I say now to everyone whowrote notes and letters to me thatI read and appreciated all of them.I have a file FULL of wonderful“good wishes” for which I am verygrateful. My abject apologies thatI do not have the time to respondto all of you individually. But myheartfelt thanks for yoursentiments. There were alsomany suggestions, which I will belooking at in the months to come.

It was thought that a single‘renewal date’ for subscriptionswould be easier to administer andthis was fixed as the 3rd Octoberin every year - that being our“Courtesy Day” in 2014. I amdelighted to say that most of ourmembers have been happy to goalong with this and, although thismight be a bit of a “muddle” in2014 with different renewal datesbeing changed, we are certainly“on track” for 2015. And I give mythanks, particularly, to thosemembers (many of you) who,despite having already paidsubscriptions earlier in 2014,

were kind enough to renew forthis October. You are all mostgenerous and I hope we canjustify your faith in us.

Before I get on to the moreimportant side of promoting theCampaign, there is one otherfinancial initiative which we havestarted this year. British Airways“On Business”. This is aCorporate scheme which enablescharitable societies to accumulate“points” - which we can use togenerate funds for the Campaign –and, no, the Executive are notflying to the Caribbean forChristmas!! The details of thescheme are on the websitehttp://campaignforcourtesy.org.uk/ - or if you want it in more detailplease ring me on 01981 540479 –it’s fairly complex! Suffice to say ifanyone is travelling on BritishAirways if they could put ournumber – 048771GB – into theirbookings on the BA website thatwould really help. Again, thewebsite has a link to show how todo this – or just ring me or [email protected] is also me with - mybusiness hat on!To more important stuff……

The “Top Town” award I will bepursuing this year and am alreadyin contact with many localCouncil offices who are interestedin vying with each other for thisaccolade in 2015. I am involvedin a local radio campaign to invitelisteners to vote for their favouritelocal business or shop (online, viatwitter or by ‘phone). I havealready discussed this in my localregion (Radio Stoke and RadioWM) and I believe this is going outacross the BBC Network. Weshould get a “winner” in eachregion and those staff will bepresented with a nice (boozy!)M&S hamper to reward them.This will start on 1st November forvoting (I hope!).

My colleagues on the Executiveare looking at far more advancedstuff involving “Twitter” (of whichI understand nothing!) and othersocial media outlets for promotionto “focus groups”. We discussedat our recent meeting who wouldbe most receptive (Rachel Stokes,my young niece of 24, invited on aconsultation basis, was veryhelpful here) - and came up withyoung parents! They are, after ahedonistic youth, finallyconcerned with what is going on

in their local community and thelanguage which their young oneshear. So it’s going to be“mumsnet” and “netmums” whoare likely to join our cause in thefuture – I sincerely hope so.It’s going to be an exciting yearand I really hope that as many aspossible will attend the AGM inMay (date TBA). Now we havemore Email addresses we cankeep you updated on this in a

more timely fashion. And if it’s anincentive to attend the meeting,British Airways will be providinggood coffee, wine, champagne(sort of) and canapés at the nextAGM so I really hope you will allbe there!With best wishes LIZ HALL(West Midlands Representative,Membership Secretary - elect andAssistant Treasurer)

Councillor LIZ HALL proudly shows the presentation folder as part ofShrewsbury Town Council’s nomination for the Campaign’s newCourtesy Top Town award. She informed attendees at the June AGM ofthe discussions and meetings she and the Chairman had had earlier inthe year with the Shrewsbury Town Council. After seeing the clean andbeautiful Shropshire County Town, both Liz and Peter proposedShrewsbury deserved the Award and the Campaign Council concurred.(Our front page picture shows Liz and Peter presenting the new trophyto the Mayor of Shrewsbury in September). This perpetual trophy wassponsored by Campaign member TONY BYWATER and his Salop LeisureCompany, and it is to be presented to a Top Town each year.Photo: JOHN McKENZIE

Following his hugely entertaining talk at our AGM in June, Patron DAVEDENNISON was presented with our Campaign Certificate Award byChairman PETER G FOOT. Earlier during the meeting, Dave revealedhis idea of introducing a Membership Gift pack which immediatelyappealed to the members and committee. The project has now movedon with Dave producing his own company’s design pack. Photo: JOHN McKENZIE


6 WINTER 2014/15COURTESY CALL Lower the volume, raise the tone

DO WE CHANGE WITHTHE FASHIONS?

A report came out in July advisingus that the population is nowmore accepting of violence andfoul language on television – onthe face of it anyway. Delve a littledeeper and what we find Ofcomactually claimed was: ‘the numberof complaints about violence, sexand expletives has droppeddrastically, with far fewer over-65s complaining about the issuethan before’.That could be said of me. At onetime I lost track of the number ofletters I had sent off by way ofobjection. I cannot remember thelast time I wrote such a letter.Thinking about it now, I realisethere are two reasons for this.First, exhaustion set in. I wastired of receiving replies all withthe same refrain. Time and againI was told that the offending word,phrase, episode or occasion was‘unlikely to have causedwidespread offence’. There wasnever anything about therightness or wrongness involved.It was always about the degree ofoffence caused. Not that it everdepended on numbers.Complainants in their thousandscontacted the BBC over JerrySpringer: the Opera – all to noavail.However, there is a second reasonfor my no longer lodgingcomplaints about offensivematerial: avoidance technique. Inthe old days when none of usexpected anything objectionableto enter our living rooms, one wasso surprised and outraged thatone complained when it did. Nowit is different. One knowsinstinctively that if certainprogrammes are to be viewed, ablast of uncivilised vocabulary orhorror or violence is going to bethe order of the day. I willtherefore deliberately avoid them.I pass on any of ArnoldSchwarzenegger’s Terminatorfilms. I know not to bother withThe Sarah Millican Show, MrsBrown’s Boys or with anythinginvolving James Corden or JackWhitehall in chat shows, oranything at all to do with KeithLemon. It’s the off-switch for them

all. As a result, I do not hearanything like as much foullanguage or see as much violenceas I once did.It therefore follows that it does notmean the decrease in complaintsnecessarily signifies forbearance,tolerance or any kind of lesseningof dislike for the offending items.Rather, it is a sign that one iscoping, resignedly, with reality.Yet a question emerges here.Supposing there was in fact morereal acceptance of the lesssavoury manifestations of life. Dowe as the National Campaign forCourtesy modify our collectivethinking? That would be to saythat the majority was necessarilyright. But was it not apparentlyagainst majority behaviour thatthe Rev Ian Gregory first got thecampaign going as The PoliteSociety in the mid-eighties? Astarker analogy comes to mind.In the Berlin of the 1930’s, thelow-life nightclub in whichChristopher Isherwood’s SallyBowles appeared would haveinvolved a raft of comediansmaking endless anti-Semiticjokes.Audiences would have roaredtheir heads off, clearly in the vastmajority. Did that make thepractice right?An interesting contribution to thedebate occurred recently with anassertion by the England footballteam manager. Roy Hodgsonapparently declared: ‘I swear infront of my wife. I do it all thetime. I never used to when I was akid but I do now, so there you go.It’s 2014. People swear – and Iswear.’ A truly dedicated followerof fashion is Roy.Argument arises too about theappropriacy of the word ‘swear’. Iwas agreeably surprised to hearWill Self, a strongly radical andpolitical writer in his radioprogramme A Point of View, referto the F-word as an obscenityrather than give it the allocationof mere swearing to which it isusually credited. Even worse isthe broadcasters’ irritatingeuphemism: strong language.Naturally we need to be aware oftrends to keep ourselves up withsocietal values. But does thatmean we cut our suit according toprevailing fashion? Perhapsmembers have ideas on thetheme.

Campaign for Courtesy

‘Please’ unlocks thestiffest door

www.campaignforcourtesy.org

50th ANNIVERSARY OFMEDIAWATCH-UK’s

STANCEOur congratulations go to

Director VIVIENNE PATTISON andher colleagues at Mediawatch-~UK who are celebrating theorganisation’s 50th anniversary in2014. Mediawatch-UK continuesto actively voice its campaignagainst the violence andpornographic content that istransmitted into homes viatelevision and video games, as wellas explicitly sexual images shownin printed literature.

Campaign Chairman PETER GFOOT commented: “Following aninvitation to a Mediawatch-UKAnnual General meeting and asubsequent discussion withVivienne, it is clear thatMediawatch-UK and ourcampaign share common causesand we hope that she and hercolleagues will have many moreyears successfully combatingthese immoral trends”.¨ www.mediawatch.org

JAQUELINE’s BLITZ ONBAD LANGUAGE

The Campaign receives regularletters from Rustington,Littlehampton member JaquelineDeeks regarding her owncampaign against bad language.She is due to pen an article in theJanuary issue of the magazinepublished by the Arun Eastbranch of the University of theThird Age. Meanwhile, she iscirculating her ‘Good LanguageProject’ badges and a T-shirtdesign. She is, indeed, a ladydedicated to her cause.

Campaign Treasurer EDWARD THOMAS pictured with SIR TREVORMcDONALD at Eastbourne’s Congress Theatre in November. Theoccasion was another high-profile lecture for the Ashridge Circle. As itsChairman Edward introduced Sir Trevor to an enthusiastic 1600-strong audience. He reported that Sir Trevor charmed everybody.

• On 13 April Edward will be introducing our Patron ROY HUDD and hiswife DEBBIE for another Ashridge Circle lecture.

MEDIA•FOCUS


7A smile – an international languageWINTER 2014/15 COURTESY CALL

DAVID WILLIAMS MBE

DRIVINGDOWNDISCOURTESY



Two Wheeled Courtesy

There has been a transformationin travel on London’s roads overrecent years with manycommuters taking to two wheelsrather than four. It is estimatedthat around 600,000 journeys perday in the Capital are now oncycles including a quarter of allrush-hour journeys.If these cyclists changed to drivingcars, then large parts of Londonwould simply grind to a halt.Moreover, cycle lanes are cheaperto maintain, bicycles do notpollute the air, and the health

benefit to cyclists themselvesprevents untold strain on ourhealth services.

However, as is often the case intransport matters, positiveoutcomes also reveal somenegatives. Regrettably a numberof tragic fatalities haveovershadowed the outstandingprogress that has been made inLondon to encourage motoristsand cyclists to display respectivecourtesy and to share the roadssafely. The statistics show that thetrue picture is that the mutualrespect and understandingbetween cyclists and motorists isbeginning to take place. In the lastten years the number of cyclistson London’s roads has doubledwhile thankfully the number ofcyclists killed in crashes hasdeclined.As in many road safety issues,Courtesy and respect for others isat the very heart of safety on ourroads and in the case ofvulnerable road users like cyclistsit is paramount. Although sadly inthe majority of collisions between

NATIONALCAMPAIGN

FORCOURTESY

motorists and cyclists, inwhich someone is killed orseriously injured, it has beenfound that it is the motorist whocauses the accident.So how should we further promotean attitude of care and courtesybetween road users? The firststage is to encourage and enforcethe rules of the road to ensurebetter compliance. For cycliststhis includes: not jumping redtraffic lights, not riding onpavements and footways, anddisplaying lights whenevernecessary. Courtesy from driversto cyclists includes driving moreslowly past cyclists, giving themmore room, looking out for themmore adequately at junctions andnot parking in cycle lanes.London’s roads are very crowded,as indeed they are in most of ourcities and towns, and road usersof all descriptions are ‘fighting’ fortheir own space. Displayingcourtesy and respect for eachother can lessen the dangersthat exist and make life both saferand less stressful for everyone.

Congratulationsto our

Vice ChairmanDAVID WILLIAMS

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8 WINTER 2014/5COURTESY CALL Courtesy costs nothing and profits everybody

PAULSMITH

SPORTSMANSHIPMATTERS


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WORLD CUP 2014 –BEST SPORTMANSHIP

MOMENTS

What a World Cup: shocks,sensations, revelations, greatfootball mixed with some crazybehaviour, wonderful goals,great celebrations, great fun,great fans, - some of whom wereliterally out of this world andlots of great sportsmanship.

Literally Out Of This World...The World Cup, for me, kickedoff with the game of football inspace. Astronauts were seen‘taking the game to a new level’whilst having a kick about inthe station with one of the bestsaves you’ll ever see (keeperdives eighteen feet). And theastronauts set the scene bywishing all teams ‘good luck’ inthe World Cup.That Magical Hand Shake...A long time ago, way back onSaturday 14 June 2014,English Manager, Roy Hodgsonwalked out onto the pitch in theArena Amazonia, in the biggestgame of his life. He went over tothe Italian dugout, stuck hishand out and shook hands withevery single Italian substitute.It was a lovely moment in anepic battle in which England’syouth shone despite losing

narrowly 2-1 to the four timesworld cup winners, Italy.Friendship Amidst HighStakes – USA and Ghana...Two days later (16 June), USAManager, Jurgen Klinsmann(former German geniusfootballer), warmly embracedthe opposition Ghana playerMichael Essien (who was on thebench) during the USA v GhanaWorld Cup Match, Despite thehigh stakes, friendshipprevailed.Ghana dance Rattles GermansAmidst Battle Of TheBrothers...Then came the Battle of theBrothers. Ghana’s Kevin Princeand his brother, Jerome Princeplaying for Germany. Ironicallythe game only sparked into lifein the second half after bothbrothers were substituted.Suddenly we had a four goalbonanza (in twenty minutes).Ghana went 1-0 down, thenequalised and scored again totake the lead playing fabulousfootball. The sheer exuberanceand joy of football was unveiledwhen we saw the Ghana goaldance celebration (see it onvideowww.GreatSportsmanship.org).Germany went on to win but theworld remembers the joy andfun demonstrated by Ghana. Asmile (and a celebratory dance)can light up the world!22-Year-Old Columbianrevelation Triggers Best TeamCelebration... Fast forward to the knock-outstages. Equipped with scientificproof from Notre DameUniversity (one of the world’sgreat sports universities) thatsportsmanship and, particularly

remembering to enjoy yoursport, actually boostsperformance. So when theyoung Colombian revelation,James Rodriguez scored anabsolutely sensational goalagainst Uruguay, his teammates shared the joy –unbridled joy with a teamdance.German, American andBelgian Managers Reveal realFriendship...Managers are leaders bydefinition, They are also rolemodels. So when oppositionmanagers display courtesy andfriendship it helps the game.During the last 16 knock-outmatch between USA V Belgiumin July, opposition managersembraced before, during andafter. What a great game. 120plus minutes of intense WorldCup battle for a place in theQuarter Finals. And all the timeUS Manager Jurgen Klinsmannand Belgium Manager, MarcWilmots behaved like oldfriends.Brazilian Respect & CourtesyFor Columbian Revelation...Quarter Finals betweenColumbia and Brazil. Amoment of respect when theColumbian World Cuprevelation James Rodriguez wasin tears after losing 2-1. Brazil’sDavid Luiz went to him,consoled him, swapped shirts,and then with an arm aroundthe young Rodriguez, turned toBrazilian fans and encouragedthem to clap Rodriguez off thepitch. Luiz also stood andapplauded Rodriguez as hewalked down the tunnel and outof this World Cup. (seewww.Greatsportsmanship.org)

FairPlay and Respect inArgentina V Holland Semi-Final...During the intensity of a WorldCup semi-final betweenArgentina and Holland therewas a lovely moment of respect.In the 85th minute, with thescore delicately balanced at 0-0,Arjen Robben, the flyingwinger/roaming striker, wastackled and knocked to the floorby the big Argentinean defender,Martin Demichelis. Bothplayers stood up, shook handsand played on. Courtesydespite the intensity!Win Or Lose Brazilian fansCelebrate Football...Brazilian fans showed greatcourtesy to the German winners(see photographs in part 2 ofwebsite). The Germansmeanwhile showed greatercourtesy to their hosts donatingall their equipment to the localswhere they were based. It was awonderful World Cup full ofcourtesy!

PAUL SMITH is the founder of theGreat SportsmanshipProgramme dedicated tomobilising communities intosportsmanship. Paul’s BBCRadio interviews are included onthe website.


9Courtesy – something always affordableWINTER 2014/15 COURTESY CALL

OUR CODE ...

l GOOD MANNERSl RESPECT – for

others and theirproperty

l RESPECT – foryourself

l REJECTION OFANTI-SOCIALBEHAVIOUR


IS TECHNOLOGY MAKING US RUDE?

The famous etiquette guideDebrett’s recently came to a fairlydamning conclusion: our ‘youngpeople’ are selfish, antisocial andunable to hold a conversation allbecause of technology. Moderntechnology one assumes, not thewheel. I should say at this pointthat I am one of these people. I amof the generation that simply doesnot remember a time beforecomputers, mobile phones and allthe information you’d ever need atthe touch of a button, and I saythis because it would therefore beall too easy for this to become anage-based defensive. That wouldbe rather boring wouldn’t it? In fact I agree there have beenramifications that are hard toignore, a culture of immediacybeing one. We can reach peoplethrough so many differentchannels now that we areexpected to be permanently oncall. If someone doesn’t reply to atext, well then I’ll call them.Failing that I could move on toFacebook and then perhapsTwitter, Skype, WhatsApp orSnapchat, all whilst googling localcarrier pigeons. The result is a‘now’ generation which,unwittingly or not, often comesacross as a lapse in manners.Despite this, I would not sayyoung people are socially lackingany more than I’d label any otherage group.I believe a vital element ofcourtesy is actively acceptingrather than passively toleratingchange. We live in a changingsociety just as we always have,and I think it is important that werecognise that the face of socialinteraction is also shifting. Theinternet can now host everythingfrom a chat with a friend tobusiness meetings and jobinterviews but, believe me, failureto hold a conversation here wouldbe as noticeable as if you wereface to face in an office.Interaction via mobile or internetalso demands the same politebehaviour. A missed ‘please’ or‘thank you’ is just as rude, whilechecking your phone midconversation won’t go unnoticedwhen you’re in front of a videocamera. Many more examplescould be mentioned but the pointis that the appropriate behaviouris no different, only the medium ofcommunication. As such, aninability to properly converse oran antisocial attitude are realflaws, but can we say this is dueto technology and not,

unfortunately, the individual? The fact that we are the first truecomputer generation has not goneunnoticed in my experience andmany of my age are all too awarethat we are the litmus test for thisunknown quantity. Somebodywho’d have been considered athinking young person in one erais just that in our present one. Tomy knowledge, no contraption inthe world can turn somebody in toa sheep if they don’t want to be,and a thinking person, of any age,has the wit to recognise moderntechnology’s flaws as well as howit can be used as a force for good.In the time it takes for vile onlineabuse to be posted, it can also beflagged as such and shows ofsolace and respect can be sent tovictims in the blink of an eye.Look at a prominent incident ofcyber bullying and underneath allthe hate are thousands ofmessages offering compassion.Community involvement too isoften aided through the internet’spotential to reach such a vastnumber of people, as well assupport for charities. I can sayfrom my own experiencevolunteering for the local AgeConcern while at university thatthe fundraising efforts from thestudent community, all frombehind a computer, werestaggering. Not antisocial. Notselfish. Technology has its pros and cons,certainly. We are also, it should behighlighted, dealing with the veryfirst generation that was bornwith technology rather thanadapting to it having experienceda life without it. To a certainextent therefore I acknowledgethat we are at a rather ‘suck it andsee’ point in time. However, surelythere’s no benefit or indeed logicin singling out the youth for

scrutiny. I for one wasn’t awarethat somebody threw theirantisocial behaviour away alongwith their Young Person’sRailcard! RACHEL STOKES

TRAVEL TRAUMAS- YouGov Poll

SPORT LEADS THE WAYFOR GENDER BALANCE

Thank goodness I booked myticket in October for the England vGermany international (21st

November). This is the first timefor the England women atWembley, although GB women’steam did us proud, of course atthat venue in the 2012 Olympics.At the time of booking, over40,000 advance tickets had beensold for the England game.

I must admit to being a greatsupporter of women, especially inthe sporting arena. For threeseasons I was the promotionsmanager for the SouthseaScorpions volleyball club whichgraced the national division oneleague. I found the female finessepreferable to the male power-serving game. The same applies totennis with more rallies by thegirls enhancing the spectacle. Inmany Olympic and Europeangames, our female athletes havebeen dominant in the medal-winning stakes. And, although thegirls are now familiar media facesfor television sport, there is still adreadful shortage of womendelivering press sport coverage.Just read any newspaper.However, society is seeing some

changes. It now seems certainthat in 2015 we will see the firstfemale Bishop appointed. NicolaSturgeon has become SNP partyleader and taken the role of firstminister in the ScottishParliament. And a twenty-two-year-old magician MeganKnowles-Bacon was recentlyappointed as the secretary of theMagic Circle – the first female tobe given the role in the Circle’shundred year history. Meanwhile,we still have the problem of onlytwenty-two female MP’s inparliament

Tel: 020 8330 3707

PETER G FOOT

WELL, I DODECLARE

• Some twenty years ago ourCourtesy Day theme one year was:‘Is technology Killing Courtesy?’ Ifanything, we were ahead of our time!

EDWARD THOMAS

London Evening Standard.... 29 August 2014

Rachel Stokes


10 COURTESY CALL WINTER 2014/15‘Thank you’ costs nothing but means so much

EasyFit DVD available fromwww. amazon.co.uk

DIANAMORAN... tune in to her weeklyexcercise spot on TheWireless from Age UKon digital radio.

VANESSA BONDe: [email protected]

TRIP BIT

PublicTransportSpokesperson

FounderREV.IANGREGORY

F-WORD USAGE SHOWSA LACK OF TALENT

The following extract from Taki’s‘High Life’ article in 18 Octoberissue of The Spectator has beenforwarded by our Founder, Rev.IANGREGORY...

Good manners, a rarity thesedays, are not a superficial act-ivity. They serve a moral purpose,that of an inner unselfishness, areadiness to put others first. Theyare the opposite of brute force,concealing man’s naturalbelligerence.

What I don’t understand(actually I do) is why producersand directors and of coursewriters choose a constant diet offilth in their shows, and when Isay filth I mean the most puerileand degrading kind. Well, I’ll tellyou: lack of talent. The F-word,used with lots of blood andexplosions, covers up theirinability to tell a clean storywithout the audience fallingasleep or falling over themselvesrunning for the exits. Most greatbooks contained no filth – thewriters left that to the imaginationof the reader. Needless to say, bynow the battle for decency hasbeen lost, what with the epidemicof vile, coarse texting in theschools where our future captainsof industry and government arebeing ‘educated’. No society hasbeen corroded as ours has, anddon’t believe those Roman orgiesever took place (if they did theywere behind Roman walls amongpatricians).

Patricians, of course, are nolonger what they used to be.Here’s my correspondent writing:‘It is not only striking that newmoney now rejects the taste andlifestyle of old money; mannersand general behaviour are alsounrecognisable. Both parents andchildren converse in stridenttones and at a volume levelsuitable for a disco.’ Yes, newmoney no longer apes old moneyand its manners, and this makesfor a zoo-like atmosphere. When Iwas very young, swearing was areal no-no. At boarding school anduniversity, a gentleman never butnever used profanity, somethingthat is almost impossible toimagine nowadays.

UNDERGROUNDETIQUETTE

According to a recent survey, thething that annoys most Londonersabout visiting tourists,is their lack of “UndergroundEtiquette”. This came out on top,above groups of foreign studentsblocking the pavements as theysaunter along the busy pavements... above people carrying oversizerucksacks and completelyunaware of who is standing nearthem and consequently causinguntold injury and above tourists,studying maps and suddenlycoming to a halt in front of anobscure monument resulting in acar-like bumper to bumper crashof bodies!

So what is “UndergroundEtiquette”? Well, first of all wehave the escalator. If you’re usedto using escalators you know that,in this country, we stand on theright and walk, or run, up or downon the left. This totally confusesmost tourists, who straddle thesteps with luggage and children asthe locals, using that most typicalof British phrases “Excuse meplease” try to rush politely past togo about their “very important”business.

We can cope with them walkingonto the platform and stoppingright in front of the entrance andtherefore blocking any chance ofgetting any further. And mostLondoners are quite happy toexplain to visitors that ‘going Weston the Circle Line, will also mean‘going East’.

But, top of the list, is gainingaccess to the train. The Etiquette

of this is that when the train doorsopen, you stand to one side toallow the passengers off the trainand this means there is now spaceon the train for other people to getin. Many’s the time I’ve had tofight my way to get off the train ashoards of tourists, afraid the trainwill go without them, are pushingtheir way on. Transport ForLondon have even realised what aproblem this isand, as the train arrives, make anannouncement to “Please allowpassengers off the trains first”. Ithink this ought to be made inseveral different languages!

One city where I have noticed ahuge change is Athens, Greece.They had a brand new Metrosystem built for their 2004Olympics. I was there soon after itopened and had to really push myway off the train as I was facedwith a solid wall of people pushingagainst me to get onboard. I feltexhausted with the effort!However, over the years I havenoticed a gradual change andnow, eureka! People stand to oneside and allow people off the trainfirst ... For the Greeks at least, thepenny (euro, drachma) hasdropped!

A wonderful place to experienceBritish Underground Etiquette isCanary Wharf Station. As you ridethe escalator down to the platformwhen the offices are emptying at5pm, you will see an amazingsight. Knowing exactly where thedoors to the train will be, there arepatient queues of business peoplestanding one behind the otherwaiting to board the train. Abeautiful sight for those of usCampaigning for Courtesy!

TRIP BIT TITBITS:“The Underground” was the namegiven to the very first trains thatran in London in 1863.Built with the ‘cut and cover’method it was the MetropolitanLine and steam trains that wentbetween Paddington andFarringdon Street. “The deep levelTube” opened in 1880 runningfrom the Tower of London toBermondsey, built using theTunnel Boring Method or ‘Shield’.When the French undergroundopened in Paris in 1900 it took thename “Metro” from London’sMetropolitan Line.

WHAT CAN WE SAY?by Rev. IAN GREGORYThere are some situations forwhich no words express howwe feel. We say ‘Oh youshouldn’t have’ if someonegives us a costly Christmaspresent. But that is the leastof the emotional challengesthat we have to face from timeto time.What can we say when wemeet somebody just bereavedof a close family member? ‘I’mso sorry’ hardly conveys anydeep assurance of comfort,but we say it anyway. Whatelse can we say?A man recently stopped me inthe street to ask if I wouldtake his funeral. As he wasstanding there in what lookedlike good health I thought itwas a bad taste joke. But hehad just come from anappointment with the doctor,who told him that testsshowed he was terminally ill,and had a month to live.What could I say? He hadbeen to a funeral I recentlyconducted, and wantedsomething similar. Not achurchgoer, he all the sameneeded to have a serious eventin which he could expressthanks for his 55 years.Several occasions during thecourse of life call unexpectedlyfor a response in the rightwords, which don’t comeeasily. For some, having tomake a speech, however brief,is among them. So is visitinga hospital to see a sickpatient, resolving a conflict,and facing long-termloneliness. What can you say?¨Congregational minister andformer journalist REV IANGREGORY has produced aseries of ‘brieflets’ which offersensitive advice to people whofeel helpless in the face of suchemotional challenges. He says:“After 30 years attendingcourts and inquests, andreporting tragedies of manykinds, and latterly as aChristian minister, I have beenexposed to a wide range ofhuman sorrow and courage’,he says. ‘Professional

counselling calls for long andserious study, but there issomething we can all say,briefly, to take the edge offunexpected shocks”.Details of the brieflets areavailable through email atiancongist@hotmail,co.uk orvia his postal address,postcode ST4 7PJ 16.

LESS ME...MORE WE


COURTESY CALL‘Please’ – the magic word 11WINTER 2014/15

UK REGIONALEXECUTIVES AND

REPRESENTATIVESWANTEDEnquiries

020 8330 3707

Time Out London -21-27 October 2014


12 WINTER 2014/15COURTESY CALL ‘Please’ unlocks the stiffest door

Dear Peter, Thank you for yourletter and leaflet, which I readwith interest. I cannot resistcommenting on one sentence,because it refers to one of my‘bees in my bonnet’ where it says“our daily media diets of ‘news’suggests we live in a societymotivated by hate, greed andselfishness” This is indeed whatthe tabloids feed us all the time,i.e. all the negative news, seldomif ever do they give us thepositive news, We’re told of thefailing schools, failing hospitals,disruptive youngsters, etc. Andseldom of the brilliant healthcare we have from most of theNHS, the excellent teaching mostof our youngsters receive, andthe amazing commitment to goodand acts of kindness whichhoards of youngsters give, oftenshaming us older people.

Of course bad news is news,seldom does good news sellpapers, but the result is that ageneral impression is given to usthe public that the NHS, schoolsand young people are ‘third rate’if not worse.

When I worked in local radio, Iused to tell our news room that,given a little thought, they aretelling us about a good society: ifevery house was burgled they’dreport the odd one that wasn’t, ifalmost all youths were yobs,they’d report the odd one that wasnot a yob! In other words, badnews being the odd newsworthyrarity gives a by-and-large goodsociety a bad name – theimpressions that we live in a sicksociety.

Look through the Courtesy Test

in the leaflet, and I think you’llfind that it’s the comparativelyrare exceptions that rile us whenwe come across them. This is notto belittle your Campaign, but Ifeel we also need to encouragepeople to see the positive as wellas bewailing the negative. Noneed to reply to this letter: it’s justdone me good to get off my chestmy view of the appalling tabloids!With all good wishes... GUY BENNETT (East Grinstead)

COURTESY IN JAPANDear Peter Foot...We have justreturned from a China and Japantour. The people in Japan are oneof the very polite race I met duringmy holiday. They speak very littleEnglish but are very polite to theirown people and visitors. Forexample...

• They hold elevator doors until you get out.

• They greet you in shops andall the staff wish you well when you leave a shop or restaurant.

• They wait in a queue to get into a train.

• They have a very punctual train service.

I can add much more. Perhapsour organisation may not beneeded there! Kind regards..Dr N. BHUVANENDRAN (Newcastle-u. Lyne)

MEDIA•FOCUS


13Smiling is infectious ... pass it on!WINTER 2014/15 COURTESY CALL

ROBERTZARYWACZ

COURTESYON THE WEB


WHY COURTESYIS A PRIORITY

FOR EVERYONEObserving how individualsbehaved towards each other in theworkplace first made me thinkseriously about the role courtesyplays in our lives.

If we think of courtesy as justsaying ‘please’ and ‘thanks’, whyshould it concern us when thereare much bigger issues to attractour attention? When people arelosing their lives throughstarvation, disease or war, theniceties of whether someoneswears or not seem trivial.

I believe courtesy is a lot morethan ‘please’ and ‘thanks’especially when we watch thedisintegration of communities intochaos around the world and,perhaps, even at home.I think courtesy is about how we

treat each individual we meet,regardless of age, sex, race,background, religion or politicalcreed. It is central to what Iremember we used to callcivilisation.

As well as making way sosomeone can pass by easily on anarrow pavement, it meanstreating an employee working a12-hour shift as a human being,offering a seat to a person wethink needs it, even if they politelydecline it, and greeting someonewho might not speak to anotherliving person that day or week. Itis about demonstrating genuinecare and concern for other people.

I think too it is particularlyrelevant to young people. Withsuch a fast pace of change insociety and with our deepeningimmersion in the digital world, weare yet to recognise their long-term effects, whether positive ornot. While social media attractsnotice for vile behaviour, there isalso generosity of spirit online.

Yet peer pressure and a feelingthat young people especially haveto emulate celebrities and postphotos daily can be a strain forthose who don’t realise that theyare not alone in struggling to keepup appearances online. Becausemany have more ‘friends’ onlinethan in the real world, some donot have anyone whom they canchat over their problems.We have never been so connected

yet simultaneously disconnected.While people want to be happy

and so many present an upbeatpersona, this can often concealinner unhappiness, conflict orworry. Job security, moneyworries, health concerns, cares forfamily or friends weigh many of usdown, often creating stress andanger, when we feel less thancourteous.

From experience, I know justhow much a smile, a kind word, asmall gesture given freely can liftthat weight, even for a moment. Ifeveryone took the opportunity toobserve people around them andgave just a few moments a day, Ibelieve that the impact ofhundreds of millions of small actsof courtesy would be huge.

That doesn’t mean that there isno courtesy already. Perhapsbecause I am part of the Nationalcampaign for Courtesy I am nowmore aware of it, but I amconscious of many people who dobehave courteously. For all thebad press that young peoplereceive, I find many to becourteous. Some could even berole models for older generations.

So while the impact of singlesmall acts of courtesy might notseem significant. I think the sumof these apparently nice butharmless behaviours is muchbigger than some think.

That is my opinion, but what isyours? I’d like to see more debatewith the Campaign about therelevance of courtesy in our livestoday. Please let us know yourviews.

#pleaseMAY wecampaign for courtesy?

Last year, the National Campaignfor Courtesy launched our new websiteat: campaignforcourtesy.org.uk. Aswell as enabling us to publishnews quickly, individuals andbusinesses can now join thecampaign and pay online via thesite. We have also started socialmedia accounts on Twitter,Facebook and Google+. Used withcourtesy, social media can be agreat benefit. It also offers us theopportunity to reach out and talkto individuals of all ages,backgrounds and cultures.It helps to have a specific focus forsocial media and we have beenconsidering what this could be.You may have heard of the IceBucket Challenge where peoplewere challenged to have ice pouredover them to raise money forcharity. This used social media tospread all round the world usingvideo. There are also differentcampaigns for various months ofthe year: Steptember, Stoptoberand Movember.What can we do to raise awarenessof courtesy in this way? Our ideafor 2015 is to launch: #pleaseMAY,a month of courtesy. #pleaseMAYgives the opportunity to ask manyquestions about courtesy, such as:#pleaseMAY we have your supportfor courtesy?#pleaseMAY can be used as ahashtag – a keyword – on Twitter,Facebook and Google+. We hope itwill appeal to all generations,demonstrate that courtesy is alsofun and encourage more peoplefrom lots of different sections of thecommunity to become involved.#pleaseMAY we ask for your help?Please visitcampaignforcourtesy.org.uk andfollow us on with your Twitter,Facebook and Google+ accounts.If you have ideas for developing thecampaign or would like to be partof the team promoting it, please getin touch either by [email protected] or calling me on 07971176044. #pleaseMAY we have yoursuggestions for using video, photosor any other media to promote thiscampaign? Finally, can we only use#pleaseMAY in May? No, it can beused at any time, but May gives usa whole month each year for aconcentrated campaign. Thecampaign’s AGM is also held inMay.

Our campaignforcourtesy.org.ukwebsite now enables individualsand businesses to join online,paying with a credit or debit card.You can choose your membershipcategory, eg individual, family, etc.and pay the appropriatesubscription. If you want to payby cheque you can download amembership form to print out andpost.There is also a donation buttonenabling anyone to make adonation of any size by credit ordebit card.All payments are handled byPayPal so the campaign does notcollect or retain any paymentdetails.As well as the website, we nowhave accounts on Twitter,Facebook, Google+, Pinterest,Linkedin and YouTube. If you useany of these services, please followus there and share posts andphotos. You will be helping toraise awareness of the campaign.You can find links to all theseaccounts from our website.

‘WORTHWHILE CAUSE’Dear Mr Foot... Just a line tothank you for such an excellentCourtesy Call for the SummerEdition. You do an immenseamount for such a worthwhilecause, and I get the impression (!)that everything is looking up forthe survival of the Campaign,after a rather worrying financialcrisis. May I say thank you andwell done for the great effortwhich you all put in. Best wishesTONY ARCHER-LOCK (Plymouth)

LOCAL MEETINGSPLEA

Member TERI RISBEY fromNewent in Gloucester, hasexpressed a wish to see theCampaign holding local meetingswhich she would be keen toattend. Teri is 86 and, althoughher husband died aged 43 she haseight children and now has twentygrandchildren. She also statesthat Newent is the smallest townin the UK.

Not since 2008 has theCampaign been ‘on the road’. In2008, following a Campaignrelaunch gathering in Croydon,we held a Regional Meeting atEastbourne in July and anotherat Southport in October. However,it is hoped that some of ourRegions will be able to hostmeetings from 2015 and that acampaign officer will be able toattend these. HQ will be pleasedto hear from any member whowould be interested in helping toorganise such gatherings.

NEWMEMBERSHIPAPLICATIONBROCHURES

NOW AVAILABLEPlease contact Surbiton H.Q.

#pleaseMAYwe have your support for courtesy?


14 WINTER 2014/15COURTESY CALL Courtesy is ‘cool’ – and warms the heart

FIONA CASTLE

OBE

Latest book:TOPIC OF CANCER - apositive and supportiveguide for patients, familiesand friends.Patient quote “I’m going todie living, not live dying”Available for small donationsto Campaign funds - contactH.Q. at 020 8330 3707e: [email protected]

DAVEDENNISON

FERDIE YEATSY

perfect gift books

For Adults...A GIFT FOR AN IDIOTand it’s sequelA GIFT FROM AN IDIOTFor Children...CLIP CHEESECAKE ANDTHE MAJELLIC BEANSthe adventures continue

CLIP CHEESECAKEMEETS BEANIE

£5 each - donated to theCampaign funds by the author.All orders to Campaign H.Q.with cheque payable to NationalCampaign for Courtesy240 Tolworth Rise South,Surbiton, Surrey KT5 9NB

SALOP LEISURE SPONSORSTOP TOWN AWARD TROPHY

Salop Leisure Limited’s Chairman TONY BYWATER shows the perpetualtrophy his company has sponsored for the Campaign’s Top Town Awardto Campaign Chairman PETER G FOOT. Tony is one of our Campaign’slongest-serving members and runs his company with an outstanding‘courtesy to customers’ policy.* In the Autumn of 2015, Shrewsbury willbe required to return this superb trophy so that it can be awarded toanother deserving town.

One of the most significant aspects of Shrewsbury’s application forthe Award was the absence of litter in and around the town. DOESYOUR TOWN MERIT AN AWARD? Contact Liz Hall for further details.

Photo by Andrew (360 Skylens Ltd.)(* See Shropshire County Times cutting – 28/3/14)



15Slow down – what’s the rush?WINTER 2014/15 COURTESY CALL

MEMBERSHIPSUBSCRIPTION FEES

l Individual ........................ £20.00 p.a.

l Family .............................. £20.00 p.a.

l OAP .................................. £7.50 p.a.

l Life Membership .................. £200.00

Registered Charity No. 328296

You probably have a number of causes and people whom youwant to benefit when you pass on.

How about leaving a portion of money to the perpetuation of anicer, kinder, politer world?

The National Campaign for Courtesy would welcome anybequest – large or small – so do think about remembering us inyour Will.

Thank you

Enquiries to: Acting Treasurer LIZ HALLTel: 01981 540479 e:[email protected]

NATIONAL

CAMPAIGNFOR

COURTESY

LEGACIES FOROUR CHARITY

Our Treasurer EDWARD THOMAS nominated CHRISTIANROBINSON, the stage manager of Eastbourne’s CongressTheatre, for the Campaign’s Certificate Award. The 1st Julyedition of the Eastbourne Gazette published the story of thepresentation. The above picture shows Christian receiving hiscertificate from Edward and Campaign Chairman at thetheatre. Also pictured are MASON PENDRY (Deputy StageManager), SIMON HINE (Chief Electrician), ADAM BRIGGS(Head Flyman) and JAMES LUFF (Stage Technician LX).


16 WINTER 2014/15COURTESY CALL Courtesy – the most rewarding virtue

•Top photo of Roy Hudd courtesy of YoursMagazine / Patrick Boyd

For details of ROY HUDD’sVERY OWN MUSIC HALL CD- see advertisement on inside back cover


17Friendship usually begins with a smileWINTER 2014/15 COURTESY CALL

FROM WASHING DISHES AT THE GROSVENOR HOUSETO OWNING £3M EASTBOURNE HOTEL

THE AMAZING NEIL KIRBY STORYThis summer’s excursionsincluded a momentous week inEastbourne where many of theCampaign members reside.Besides these and many closeshowbusiness friends, the resorthas the most hospitable hotelmagnificently located on theseafront. The Langham Hotel isowned by a very remarkable mancalled Neil Kirby and it was he,and his wife Wendy and the hotelstaff, that Campaign memberGaye Vaughan nominated for ourCampaign Courtesy Award. Gayeduly presented the Award to Neilon 10 July in recognition of thehotel’s reputation for providingoutstanding and courteousservice to its guests andrestaurant customers. (Ouraccompanying picture showsWendy Kirby and waitress NataliaCharzynska holding up thecertificate).

My two interviews with NeilKirby this summer only scratchedthe surface in revealing details ofhis extraordinary andinspirational career. Now in hissixties, he began his working lifewashing dishes in the basement ofLondon’s famous GrosvenorHouse Hotel aged fifteen and ahalf. Inspired by the Forte family,he worked his way up to becomingthe boss of the capital’s top hotelwhile extending his hospitalityand service to royalty,international film andshowbusiness stars, politiciansand sporting heroes. However, hisultimate goal was to own a hotelof his own. This he achieved in2005 when he and Wendy signeda contract to buy the 85-bedroomLangham Hotel for an outlay of

£1.85million. The story of his riseas a boy from a South Londoncouncil estate to owning the topfamily-owned hotel in Eastbourneis told in a candid andilluminating autobiography‘Celebrity Hotel’ co-written withthe assistance of author andbroadcaster Paul James.*

The book provides a fascinatinginsight behind the scenes in theday-to-day running of a big hotelwhere the smaller details ofservice and hospitality areparamount. His investment in theLangham has proved sosuccessful that it now has an AA4-star rating and is valued ataround £3million. As well asfulfilling its vital role of comfortand service to its appreciativeguests, Neil’s ‘function experience’has made the Langham the majorvenue for the local community’ssocial life. The aforementionedJuly lunch was one of the regulartalks that he and aide Paul Jamesgive about his life and the ‘history’of his magnificent hotel. I lookforward to my next visit.PETER G FOOT

The showbiz theme of the Langham continued in May whenchoreographer JAN LYNTON had her celebratory lunch at the Langhamto mark her 70th birthday. Again the Campaign was well representedamongst Jan’s showbusiness colleagues and friends.On 27 May, the Eastbourne showbiz fraternity joined the ChairmanPETER G FOOT’s tea party in the Langham Hotel lounge. Hotel ManagerSIMON BROWN took the above photograph featuring l. to r. DENISEHARE, JAN LYNTON, GAYE VAUGHAN, TOM PLUMMER, PETER, CHRISHARE, JACQUI TOYE (standing), BERYL PLUMMER and PAUL DAVIS.

On 10 July at Eastbourne’s Langham Hotel, Campaign member GAYEVAUGHAN presented our Courtesy Award certificate to proprietor NEILKIRBY and his staff in recognition of their courtesy and outstandingservice to the hotel guests and restaurant customers. Pictured l.to r.rear are: author/broadcaster PAUL JAMES, NEIL KIRBY and his sonNEIL; l. to r. front: receptionist FAYE CHILLINGWORTH, GAYEVAUGHAN, Campaign Chairman PETER G FOOT, waitress NATALIACHARZYNSKA, Proprietor MRS WENDY KIRBY (holding certificate), andcampaign members OLIVIA BREEZE and JAN LYNTON, and CampaignTreasurer EDWARD THOMAS.

Photo by Hotel Manager SIMON BROWN

Whilst interviewing NEIL KIRBY I was also able to speak to two membersof his hardworking staff... Receptionist FAYE CHILLINGWORTH clearlyenjoys meeting the public and presents a cheerful and bubblypersonality to all arrivals. The 25-year-old has accountancy skills andhospitality Multi-Skill qualifications. From Hastings, she previouslyworked for three years at the High Beach Hotel as a receptionist.Waitress NATALIA CHARZYNSKA loves contact with people and enjoysher waitress work at the Langham. In her native Poland she qualifiedto be a chef. This charming 29-year-old has a big smile that more thanoffsets any difficulty that guests/customers might have over her richPolish accent!

SHOWBIZ CELEBRATIONS AT THE LANGHAMOn 30 January, campaign member GAYE VAUGHAN celebrated her

80th birthday by providing her many friends – including many showbizfriends of hers and her late husband, singing star MALCOLM VAUGHAN– with a superb lunch at the Langham Hotel. Our picture of Campaignrepresentatives taken in the hotel reception features l. to r. CHRIS andTRICIA SNEATH, JAN LYNTON, GAYE, JEAN TAYLOR, OLIVIA BREEZE,PETER G FOOT, FIONA CASTLE and EDWARD THOMAS. (Photo by HARRY LEDERMAN/PETER KILLICK)


*’CELEBRITY HOTEL’by NEIL KIRBY as

told to PAUL JAMES

ISBN 978-1-909359-25-3

RRP £9.99. Available from

Langham Hotel, Royal Parade,Eastbourne, East Sussex BN22 7H

www.langhamhotel.co.uk


18 COURTESY CALL

DOUG BOWS OUTSadly we have lost a great manfrom our Campaign team. On 30June, our Patron DOUG McKENZIEdied in hospital. Known as the‘showbusiness number one’photographer, he was admiredand respected by his friendswhich included some of thegreatest international stars aswell as statesmen and royalty.Earlier this year Doug, his sonJOHN McKENZIE and I wereworking on producing a bookhighlighting Doug’s amazingcareer. Now, John and theMcKenzie family have agreed tocontinue work on the book whichis to be a tribute to a ‘star behindthe camera’. On 2nd October thefollowing Memorial Service washeld. Thank you Doug for all yoursupport. It was a privilege to beyour friend. PGF

Jim Kennedy / Peter G FootSHOWBIZ

BOOK MARTA to Z Biographies

(Dave Allen to Andy Williams)£5 hardbacks £3 paperbacks

Proceeds toNATIONAL CAMPAIGN for COURTESY

For complete list of titles -Campaign H.Q. Tel: 020 8330 3707


* *


ENROL AFRIEND

Do you have friends who share your views about the demise of good manners and respect in today’ssociety? We already have a healthy membership but if we are to influence those in power to combatindifference and restore this country’s reputation, we need an even bigger membership base. If youknow someone who might be interested in receiving a National Campaign for Courtesy brochure, doplease provide their name and address. Thank you.

Name ..........................................................................

Address ......................................................................

..................................................................................

..................................................................................

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MEMBERSHIP(including quarterly magazine)

SUBSCRIPTION FEES• Individual .............................................. £20.00 p.a.• Family .................................................... £20.00 p.a.• OAP ........................................................... £7.50 p.a.• Life Membership ................................... £200.00


19WINTER 2014/15 COURTESY CALL

ROY HUDD’sVery own music hallMy Old Dutch, A Nice Quiet Day,When Father Papered theParlour, The Spaniard ThatBlighted My Life, The Hole in TheElephant’s Bottom.and many more!£5 including p&p – Cheque/Pos toROY HUDD ENTERPRISESPO Box 604, Ipswich IP6 9WZ

CD...Comedic Delight!

Courtesy

Callmagazine

Egmont House • 240 Tolworth Rise South • Surbiton • Surrey • KT5 9NBTel: 020 8330 3707 e: [email protected]

CLOUD LUCKY SEVENPUBLICATIONSProp: PETER G FOOT‐ publisher and editor of

‐ andMitchell Music‐quarterly magazine of the GUY MITCHELL APPRECIATION SOCIETY

Is your life filled with familiar friendly faces?


20 WINTER 2014/15COURTESY CALL Good manners are their own reward

In June, our Central WestEngland Regional Executive LIZHALL was contacted by PERRYSPILLER of BBC Radio Stoke. Thefollowing is her account of theinterview:The Subject was whether the ‘howdo you do?’ greeting should beencouraged as opposed to ‘Hi, howyou doin’, ‘Wassup?’ Or ‘How’s ithanging?’ – amongst others! Alsowhether the ‘kiss and hug’, ‘highfive’, ‘knuckle touch’ and so on arereally appropriate or should westick with the traditionalhandshake? This was a result ofa (nice sounding and veryintelligent) social anthropologistwho said, after twenty year’sresearch, that we, in Britain, nolonger know how to greet eachother.

My take on this was that thelanguage evolves and ‘how do youdo?’ is out of date. If we don’tmove on we would still be greetingeach other with ‘Wither goestthou?’ Also, a question aboutwhich you have no interest orexpectation of receiving an honestreply is probably not worthasking. I said that the Campaignmessage would be the honest one- a handshake and ‘Hello, I am sopleased to meet you’ or ‘Hello, niceto meet you’. The kiss and hug, isreserved for those you know wellor for whom you feel particularaffection. But if approached with

the hug go along with it becauseto back off would be impolite. The‘high five’ and ‘knuckle touch’don’t particularly come my waybeing a 50ish woman – but I don’treally have a problem with those.Mostly culled from the sportingfields, I think, but none the worsefor that – a friendly greeting isgood in any ‘language’. The ladyanthropologist made the pointthat the UK has one of the highestrecords of ‘good manners andcourtesy’ at around 80% - notsomething easy to judge, I realise,but this is based on othercountries’ perception of us. So wemust be doing something right!!

The radio programme was alight-hearted discussion and‘phone in’ so nothing in depth andthe interview was under threeminutes. Still I did a bit ofadvertising for the Campaign Ihope! I seem to be becoming oneof their regular ‘get someone onthe phone to make it moreinteresting’ contacts. I don’t havea problem with that.

Well done Liz! If you, Dear Member,

feel you could take on a local radio

or local press interview, I would

love to hear from you. WE DO

NEED MORE PEOPLE VOICING

OUR CAMPAIGN AIMS. Let’s

discuss it – phone 020 8330 3707

(Mon-Fri/(9:30-5pm).

Thank you...Editor (Peter G Foot)

E. MAIL?In between editions of COURTESY CALL magazine we may wish todistribute news up-dates. This would be in the form of newsletters andit would be more economical to e-mail these to you. If you have an emailaddress and wish to receive our newsletters in this way, please contactus with your email address. Thank you

Peter G Foot (Chairman)e: [email protected]

LISTEN IN WITH LIZ

RADIO INTERVIEWS

Interviews undertaken since previouslist (Courtesy Call - Autumn 2013)Stations in alphabetical order oflocation plus dates/interviewer’snames and campaign interviewees’initials - i.e. ET (Edward Thomas), DW(David Williams), PGF (Peter G Foot),RZ (Robert Zarywacz) and LH (LizHall).

BBC Radio WM Birmingham1/8/14... PGF/Peter MorganBBC Radio Cumbria12/7/14... PGF/Anne HopperBBC Local Stations Network UK15/12/14... RZ/Mark ForrestBBC Radio Sheffield15/11/14... PGF/Toby BusterBBC Radio Stoke2/6/14... LH/Perry Spiller17/7/14... LH/Perry SpillerBBC Radio Tees5/6/14... ET/Mike Parr20/11/14... DW/Mike Parr FRIDAY 6 MARCH 1PM TILL APPROX. 4PM

EXECUTIVE COMMITTEE MEETINGMembers WelcomeCoffee/tea/fruit juice and Sandwich lunch will beprovided at no charge

SATURDAY 30 MAY 1PM TILL APPROX. 4PMANNUAL GENERAL MEETINGFor members and Patrons. Guests welcomeCoffee/tea/fruit juice and Sandwich Lunch will beprovided at no charge.‘Pay Bar’ for wine, etc.*GUEST SPEAKER

VENUE FOR BOTH MEETINGS...

35 Craven TerraceLancaster GateLondon W2 3ELTel: 020 7723 9276 Fax: 020 7706 2870E; info@lancaster‐hall‐hotel.co.ukWebsite: www.lancaster‐hall‐hotel.co.ukPlease advise Liz Hall (01981 540479) of attendance 5 days prior for catering planning.Thank you.

NATIONALCAMPAIGN

FORCOURTESY

2015MEETINGS

We would be pleased to hear from any business or

organisation who would like to sponsor a future issue of

Courtesy Call. A donation of £400 would meet half the

cost of printing this magazine and in return for such

sponsorship, we would provide one page that can be

devoted to telling the story of the donor’s service or

activities plus a trailer caption on the magazine’s front

cover. Such content should not, of course, conflict with

the aims and activities of the Campaign for Courtesy.

Interested parties are invited to discuss without

obligation such sponsorship with the N. C for C

Chairman on 020 8330 3707 (or via email:

[email protected]). Thank you.


courtesy call winter 2014-15

Documents

town award trophy

town awardvisits

adeserving town

picturesque town of

new award trophy

thenew campaign

mayor of shrewsbury

campaign comment retirements