developed and presented by: marion grobb finkelstein communication catalyst marionspeaks –...
TRANSCRIPT
Developed and presented by:
Marion Grobb Finkelstein
Communication CatalystMARIONSPEAKS – Training & Consulting
www.MarionSpeaks.com 289-969-7691
The POWER of body language: Use it to your advantage!
www.MarionSpeaks.com
2www.MarionSpeaks.com
Rules of Engagement
Be present Take notes Q/A Action items
My gift to you …
Biz card in bag ... “Life’s a Gamble”
e-Chapter
BOR special deals
SILENT AUCTION! Ends @ 1:30pm
www.MarionSpeaks.com
4www.MarionSpeaks.com
Innovative ways to connect ...
TWITTER:#CIC2013
Email colleagues
www.facebook.com/MarionSpeaks
Voting ...
RATE YOURSELF: How comfortable are you raising your hand?
1 -- absolutely UNcomfortable 10 -- absolutely COMFORTABLE
www.MarionSpeaks.com
Let’s try that again ...RATE YOURSELF: How comfortable are you raising your hand?
1 -- absolutely UNcomfortable 10 -- absolutely COMFORTABLE
www.MarionSpeaks.com
TurningTechnologies.ca
Why read body language?
Connect with others
You know what to expect (can plan)
Improve productivity
Move to action with less risk
7
(Before) RATE your ability to read body language ...
1 – lowest
10 – highest
www.MarionSpeaks.com
9
Words
Voice
Body
???%
???%
???%
QUESTION: How Do YouConnect With Others?
10
Words
Voice
Body
7 – 10%
20 – 38%
55 – 80%
ANSWER: How Do YouConnect With Others?
11
Mirroring and Matching
Actions
Pace
Volume
Breathing
‘‘feels weird’’
EXERCISE: write your name
www.MarionSpeaks.com
Mirroring and Matching
13
SOURCE: Scientific American Felicity Muth, Why do dogs yawn when they see sleepy humans?May 28, 2013)
14
TIP:
Never speak faster than your client
15
Four Key Cs to unlocking body language
C________
C________
C________
C________
CONTEXT: Degree of familiarity affects body language...
www.MarionSpeaks.com
17
Closer Touch
Longer More eye contact Caution: cultural
differencesAsian: can cover a gamut of emotions
CULTURE: Smile ... It’s universal
CULTURE: Smile ... It’s universalSource: Amy Cuddy & Dana Carnie, Harvard University
www.MarionSpeaks.com
Happy Happy
19
CALIBRATION:
20
CLUSTERS: Interested
21
Strategy
Carry on!
QUESTION:
“Picking imaginary lint” is associated with … A) Boredom / lack of interest B) Lying / not believing C) Disapproval / critical evaluation D) Dandruff
22
23
Disapproval / critical evaluation
24
Strategy:
Break the position (arms)
Ask “what’s your opinion?”
Lean in / open palms up
QUESTION:
“Fidgeting” is associated with … A) Nervousness B) Disinterest C) No confidence D) Too much to do
25
26
Disinterest
27
Strategy:
Change subject
Engage, e.g., ask questions
Physically move them
QUESTION:
“Protruding thumbs” is associated with … A) Hitchhiking B) Inferiority C) Shyness D) Superior attitude
28
29
Superior attitude
30
Strategy:
Opinion
Eye contact
Posture
Moderate speech pace
QUESTION:
“Ear pull” is associated with … A) Nervousness B) Lying / not telling the full truth C) Carol Burnett D) Flirting / being physically attracted
31
32
Not telling truth / not believing you
33
Strategy:
Clarify; Ask open-ended Qs
… Point out discrepancies
Non-accusatory, neutral language: “I’m not following … I don’t understand …”
Project interest, calm
QUESTION:
“Clenched teeth” is associated with … A) Anger B) Nervousness C) Worry D) None of the above
34
35
Angry, frustrated, tense
36
Strategy:
Engage them / listen
Neutral language
Matter-of-fact (match) tone
Bridge and lead
37
RECAP: 4 Cs to unlocking body language
Context
Culture
Calibration
Clusters
38
REMINDER: You can’t read people’s minds … just their actions
In doubt? Clarify
4 Cs
BONUS: Power poses Source: Amy Cuddy, Harvard University
www.MarionSpeaks.com
BONUS: Power poses ... NOT Source: Amy Cuddy, Harvard University
www.MarionSpeaks.com
BONUS: Power poses Source: Amy Cuddy, Harvard University
FREEZE!!!!
www.MarionSpeaks.com
BONUS: Power poses Source: Amy Cuddy, Harvard University
www.MarionSpeaks.com
BONUS: Power poses Source: Amy Cuddy, Harvard University
www.MarionSpeaks.com
BONUS: Power poses Source: Amy Cuddy, Harvard University
www.MarionSpeaks.com
BONUS: Power posesSource: Amy Cuddy & Dana Carnie, Harvard University
www.MarionSpeaks.com
Happy Happy
LEADERS: High
testosterone+
Low cortisol
HYPOTHESIS: High
testosterone+
Low cortisol
BONUS: Power poses – TAKE-AWAYS
Source: Amy Cuddy & Dana Carnie, Harvard University
Prepare in advance Just 2 min. power poses
Expand comfortably Avoid dominating Avoid complimenting
RESULT: Higher testosterone (confidence) Lower cortisol (stress)
www.MarionSpeaks.com
47www.MarionSpeaks.com
Learning a new skill is a gamble
“You are in a better position to take a gamble because you know that you
have the skills to make informed choices ...”
SOURCE:
Marion Grobb Finkelstein,
“Life is a Gamble” chapter
The Power of the Platform: Speakers on Success
Pg. 164
(After) RATE your ability to read body language ...
1 – lowest
10 – highest
www.MarionSpeaks.com
QUESTION: what’s the probability of you USING what you learned here today? 1 – lowest
10 – highest
www.MarionSpeaks.com
50
Alzheimer's & body language
“People with dementia increasingly resort to physical, non-verbal communication” (www.dementia.com)
• Mirror/match• Match BL with words• Keep eye contact, touch
51www.MarionSpeaks.com
Your ACTION item
What are YOU moving to action?
My gift to you …
Biz card in bag ... “Life’s a Gamble”
e-Chapter
BOR special deals
SILENT AUCTION! Ends @ 1:30pm
www.MarionSpeaks.com
53www.MarionSpeaks.com
Your gift to me … your feedback
Let’s stay connected
“Marion’s Communication Tips” enews www.MarionSpeaks.com
www.facebook.com/MarionSpeaks
Speaking / training needs in YOUR organization
54
55
FINAL THOUGHTS: Let me hear your body talk!
Marion Grobb Finkelstein
Communication Catalyst• [email protected]
• www.Facebook.com/MarionSpeaks• www.MarionSpeaks.com
56