Download - Meekie Monthly, Issue 7 (August 2007)
-
8/14/2019 Meekie Monthly, Issue 7 (August 2007)
1/29
Welcome to Meekie Monthly. If you have
experienced problems opening this magazine,please visit PC World and get yourself a better
computer.Oh. And theres a large picture of a woman in abikini on the front cover (in case youre at work
and your boss is watching you)
Royston
-
8/14/2019 Meekie Monthly, Issue 7 (August 2007)
2/29
MEEKIEMONTHLY Issue 7 August 2007
F R E E
I t s a s m a d a s a
b a d g e r
Inside:People with largeheads, people withsmall heads, people with medium sizedheads, people with
famous heads,
people with not sofamous heads,
ginger heads andmuch much more!
Pac-a-Macs Away!Bikinis On!
Yes we dont care if its pishing down were going to have a summer anyway!
S A Y N
O T O
K A G O
O L S
S A Y Y E S T O
B I K I N I S
SPECIAL SUMMER SPECIAL!
-
8/14/2019 Meekie Monthly, Issue 7 (August 2007)
3/29
Editors welcomeFor me, August reminds me of
being a child, growing up in BarryIsland, South Wales and in particular,the Barry Carnival.Years ago, in its halcyon days, the
Barry Carnival boasted over 100floats- articulated lorries dressedfrom top to bottom with bunting, andfull of people in fancy dress around aparticular theme. These days, its just
a Variety Sunshine coach with a fewkids waving Union Jacks out of theback window. Shame.
So in time honoured tradition this month, my familyare going to recreate a parade for ourselves in ourlarge country mansion. Ive bought myself astrapping Tarzan outfit and my surgically-enhancedwife Brenda has bought herself some tassles to puton the end of her enormous juggernauts. Meanwhile,my darling 16 year old daughter has offered to give ahand to help relieve the drivers and young Timmy
has set up a Coke stall for the local fete.Isnt it great to see the kids gettinginvolved?Have a great August. Editor
R o y st on MEEKIEMONTHLYMEEKIEMONTHLYMEEKIEMONTHLYMEEKIEMONTHLY Page 2Page 2Page 2Page 2
meekiemonthlyContact details:
Editor: Royston Butterscotch
Cover girl: Sabrina Lernawww.sabrina-lerna.com
Cover photo courtesy of Onyx Photographywww.onyxphotgraphy.com
Find us at www.meekiemonthly.com andwww.myspace.com/meekiemonthly
Meekie Monthly is a freesubscription-based E-Magazine.
To subscribe, email [email protected]
www.meekiemonthly.com
We take your privacy very seriously. Meekie Monthly is a free subscription based magazine and you can unsubscribe at any time by emailing
[email protected] , putting UNSUBSCRIBE in the Subject box. Wewon't sell or share your email address with anyone else and we will never ask you for any money. We may occasionally send you an update via this email
address. Meekie Monthly is sent as a pdf file, which opens with Adobe AcrobatReader. You can download this utility for free from www.adobe.com. We cannotaccept responsibility for any consequences relating to Meekie Monthly being
sent to work-based email addresses.
-
8/14/2019 Meekie Monthly, Issue 7 (August 2007)
4/29
ContentsIssue 7 August 2007
In this months Meekie Monthly:
5. Interesting facts about Le Tour de France6. Celebrity Showdown Kids TV Stars fight it out8. The BIG Interview with areal life celebrity!9. Letters page
12. Cover band13. The Lads Page Learnhow to head spin!14. Rugby World Cup Preview15. Boys problems
16. We speak to more celebs!20. A Flowchart Thing22. Fok knows22. Have a look yourself 26. Your horscopes28. Sport
The re s no I in Te am bu t
the re a re t wo in Corpora te
Bullshi t ting Ars e hole
Hu s s e in , Ne w p o r t
The Oo get me, Im sucha Diva Competition
As you know Meekie Monthly likes to askcelebrities daft questions and in mostcases, they respond in good humour.
Occasionally though, we get replies thatreally make our day. See if you can guess
which mega stars PA sent us this littlegem:
***** would not be able to participate in aninterview unless; you could offer a fee for his time,offer him an excusive interview asking more than 1question (therefore giving ***** an opportunity totalk about different things he is up to), publish the
address of his new websitecurrently in development and provide him with
proof of print.
He certainly wouldnt wish to answer just the onequestion you have posed Im afraid. Ive attached a
biog of ***** for your interest;
Thanks Regards,
Alan
Answer revealednext month!
-
8/14/2019 Meekie Monthly, Issue 7 (August 2007)
5/29
For our new readers.(both of them) ..
W h a t i s a m e e
k i e ?
MEEKIEMEEKIEMEEKIEMEEKIE MONTHLY Page 4Page 4Page 4Page 4
This is a real-lifephoto of a meekie
Meekie Fact: Meekies can be found thewhole world over even in places likeHolland
Sigh! Do we really have to go throughthis every month?
For those of you who do not yet know, a meekie is a person witha very large head, usually through no fault of their own. There isnothing wrong with these people. Meekie Monthly aims tocelebrate these amazing people and has been doing so since1988.
This is a drawing of a meekie by a well-renowned artist
By Staff Reporter Gordon Stribling
Vicky Pollard, the rude, obnoxious schoolgirl created by recently-married gay comedian Matt Lucas and his comedy partner, the'definitely not gay so stop asking' David Walliams, attackedCatherine Tate's almost identical creation Lauren Cooper yesterdayduring a Geography lesson.
Lyndzi Shuttleworth, a teaching assistant who witnessed theincident described how a discussion about earthquakes sparked itoff. "Lauren was mouthing off about some unrelated rubbish as sheoften does and you could see Vicky getting more and more
agitated. She just wanted to learn about tectonic plates. Those twohave had issues with each other since Lauren started hogging thelimelight."
Lauren responded to the teacher's request for quiet by shouting,quite loudly, "Am I bovvered?", which was enough to send Vickyover the edge. "She just flipped and leapt over the table over towards Lauren. The teacher tried to retain order but before hecould the encounter had descended into a 2-way bout of aggressive catchphrase-tennis". Both participants were stuck in aloop of nonsensical teenage ramblings. "I don't think Nigel [theteacher] could do anything. He tried to break it up but he probablyhadn't been taught how to deal with this kind of situation before."
Walter Sensibly, a well-behaved classmate of the two girls tried
reasoning with them but was quickly shouted down. "I tried tellingthem that they were both hilarious fictional characters, but theydidn't want to know."
Its Pollard vs. Cooper Its Pollard vs. Cooper Its Pollard vs. Cooper Its Pollard vs. Cooper
in Classroom Conflictin Classroom Conflictin Classroom Conflictin Classroom Conflict
-
8/14/2019 Meekie Monthly, Issue 7 (August 2007)
6/29
MEEKIEMEEKIEMEEKIEMEEKIE MONTHLY Page 5Page 5Page 5Page 5
1 0 1 t h i n g s y o u n e v e r k n e w
a b o u t L e T o u r de F r a n c e
1. Le Tour De France was in ve n ted in France in 1962 b y a y
oung Be lgian s heep
fa rmer ca lled S imon.
2. The race in vol ve s lo ts o f pe ople on bike s going a ro
und Fra nce on a joll y. C yclis ts
ta ke in the admirable s ce ne r y be fore s topping a t va rious public hous es a long the
wa y. 3. The s o-ca lle d race a t tra c t
s a lo t o f a t te n tion e ve r y ye a r due to i ts high
in jur y ra te . Loca ls on the course place be ts on ho w man y gra
zed kne es the re
will be wi thin a de s igna te d kilome tre . Las t yea r s a w 1,354 gr
aze d knees , 14 gra ze d e lbo ws
a nd a fa t lip whe n one ride r ran in to the ba ck o f a co w.
4. This ye a rs race will be he ld in France , Europe .
5. Bic ycle te chnolog y ha s come a long wa y s ince 1962. Th
e s e da ys , mos t c ycle s a re fi t ted wi th ABS , a ir-
bags , GPS and GB s ticke rs .
6. P a s t winne rs o f this pres tigious race ha ve gone on to ge
t be t te r jobs . Gre gor y Le Monde , who won the
ti tle in 1962 and a ga in in 2006 for ins tance , ha s s ince gone o
n to s ta r in the hi t T V s ho w E x Le Tour de
France Winne rs Big Bro the r S ho w. He came s econd to P hilippe Fe lop, who was a fa
ke c yclis t.
7. C yclis ts ha ve to be ve r y fi t to en te r the ra ce . I ts no t unus
ua l for s ome c yclis ts to do 10 s i t ups BEFORE
the ir Corn flake s a nd 10 more AF TER.
8. Tradi tiona ll y, the c yclis t who drinks the mos t ge ts the fam
ed ye llo w ve s t. This origina te s from the French
word ye llo w ves t, which mean to drink a lo t and puke your g
u ts up.
9. The re will be a firs t in this yea rs race when rac
e rs will be a llo wed to dre s s up in fanc y dre s s .
10. C yclis ts can go qui te fa s t on the ir bike s . S ome bikes can go a s fa s t a s 15 mph, a l though the world
record goes to Cedric P le b, who reached the gidd ying s peed
o f 128mph o f f the s ide o f a ra vine in 1976.
Give mesomedrugs
maaaaan
-
8/14/2019 Meekie Monthly, Issue 7 (August 2007)
7/29
V Loo ks : Nodd
y s imp is h good loo ks, h is ro
s y c hee ks and
s t y l is h a t t ire ma ke h im ver y
popu lar w i t h t he lad ies 8
/10
Com ic Ta le n t: Nodd y s s ta
nd -up rou t ines were s tu f f o f
legends. We forge t w h y t ho
ug h 10/10
Ha ir: Nodd y s cra z y ha irs t y
le is kep t under wraps b y h
is b ig
b lue ha t. Go on Nod ge t i t
ou t! 9 /10
He ig h t : Nodd y was born a t 4 2 and
has s ta yed t ha t wa y
e ver s ince . Use fu l for h id ing be h ind mus hroom
s t houg h.
Apparen t l y
9/10
To ta l: 36/ 40
Its a draw! Hoorah!
Lo o k s : S ome sa y t ha t Bods no-f us s look s ma k e him a ppr oa c ha ble . S ome s a y t ha t he s f ok k in ugly
9/ 10 Co m ic T a le n t : Bods c omic t a le nt c ome s s t r a ight f r om t he hips jus t c he c k out t ha t w a lk !
9/ 10 Ha ir : Bods minima lis t a ppr oa c h t o lif e goe s s t r a ight t o his he a d. No ha ir s a v e s mone y on shampoo. S ple ndid 10/ 10 He ig h t : Bods 26 f r a me ge t s la r ge r a nd
la r ge r a s he w a lk s
t ow a r ds t he c a me r a a nd e nds up 69 8/ 10 T ot a l:
36 / 40
MEEKIEMEEKIEMEEKIEMEEKIE MONTHLY Page 6Page 6Page 6Page 6
Celebrity Showdown
BO D N O D
-
8/14/2019 Meekie Monthly, Issue 7 (August 2007)
8/29
-
8/14/2019 Meekie Monthly, Issue 7 (August 2007)
9/29
h
-
8/14/2019 Meekie Monthly, Issue 7 (August 2007)
10/29
DFS Duppe r
I would like to compla in a bou t DFS ,
the furni ture s tore . Ha ving s po t te d a
a d ve r tis e me n t on the te ll y whe re
the y s a id tha t the y we re holding
the ir s a le , I rus he d ou t the hous e
a nd do wn to m y loca l s tore where I
s pe n t 4,600 on a ne w le a the r so fa ,
wi th ma tching re clining a rm cha irs a nd a ne s t o f ta ble s . Ba rga in I
though t. A we e k la te r a nd Im s a t wa tch-
ing te ll y while I ha ve m y te a a nd
wha t comes on? Ano the r DFS s ale
a d ve r t! Ano the r 4,600 tha t I ha ve to
s pla s h ou t! Wh y can t the y jus t le a ve
me in pea ce ? I ve a lre a d y for 42
s o fa s a nd 108 a rmcha irs ! I don t
ne e d a n y more !
Tin a We tc le f t Da rling o tn
e a r M e e k i e M o n t h y . . . . . . . . Y o u r f a v o u r i t e l
e t t e r s p a g e . . . . c o s w e s a y s o
Loud Foreigners
Why do foreigners feel theneed to talk so loud? WhenIm sat on the bus, I like tohear the rise and fall of theDennis Dart SLF/ TransbusInternational Plaxton Super Pointer Easyriders engine,not some loud-arsedmumbo-jumbo .
Dai, email
MEEKIEMEEKIEMEEKIEMEEKIE MONTHLY Page 9Page 9Page 9Page 9
W h is k y W o b b le r I w o u ld lik e t o c om p la in b it t e r ly a b o u t t h e s o - c a lle d h e a lt h b e n e f it s o f a t ip p le be f o r e b e d t im e . I s u n k a b o t t le o f w h is k y la s t n ig h t , a n d a s y o u
c a n s e e , I w a s n t lo o k in g o r f e e lin g t o o g o o d t h is m o r n in g . I s u g g e s t t h a t p e op le w h o m a k e a lc o h o l t h in k t w ic e b e f o r e s e llin g s u c h d r in k s t o ir r e s p o n s ib le f o o ls lik e m e .
Gr a h a m Lo o s e s - t o o l Bir m in g h a m
Bo y Ra c e r Fig h t b a c k I w uz mos t ups e t la s t munf t o
r e e d a bo u t a kin da pis s a bo boy r a s e r s . u obv us ly ha v e nt e v a t r y e d r a s ing a v ox a ll nov a dow n da r oa d b4 ha v u? I s u je s t s da t u ge t s ur s e lf be y ind da w e e l of 1 ov de s e mons t a ca r s b4 s la ging us of f . a ny mor e of da t s t uf f a n ill ge t da boy z r ow nd t o do u ov a
K y le , e ma il
ps iv e s e nt u a pic of my w oma n cos I f ink s he s hot . I ge t s t o s t a y a t he r how s e t w ice a w e e k a n s he e v e n le t me t uch he r poona mi once
-
8/14/2019 Meekie Monthly, Issue 7 (August 2007)
11/29
-
8/14/2019 Meekie Monthly, Issue 7 (August 2007)
12/29
Get noticed
MEEKIEMEEKIEMEEKIEMEEKIE MONTHLY Page 11Page 11Page 11Page 11
Even in small business, image is everything
Press releases web page content sales letters newsletters advertisements advertorials brochures feature writing
www.beacon-media.co.uk
-
8/14/2019 Meekie Monthly, Issue 7 (August 2007)
13/29
MEEKIEMEEKIEMEEKIEMEEKIE MONTHLY Page 12Page 12Page 12Page 12
Ginger
Personof theMonthAward
Every month, Meekie Monthly celebratesbeautiful ginger people by giving them
an award. Arent we nice?
Name: Liz Hometown: Cardiff Why I love being ginger: I've alwaysliked the colour and it certainly attractscompliments! I quite like being
automatically different, too.
MY LEONARDThis months cover bandareBarry rockers My Leonard.
Back in the mid 1990s,Barry town rocked to thebig guitar sound of theHappy Kings. For a while,
the Kings ruled the town,putting in some legendaryperformances in Camdenand Cardiff. After somerock and roll dust-ups, theHappy Kings went their separate ways. And that was that.
Fortunately though, the majority of the band have decided to dustdown their guitar cases, plug in and make some more noise.Headed up by Jim on guitar and vocals, My Leonard have addednew band members, including Zelda on vocals, and Alan onguitar. Banging on the bongos is Jon and on bass, Dylan, who waswriting music at the tender age of 13.
My Leonard are now in the studio laying down some new tracksfor the autumn, but until then, Meekie Monthly is proud to give itsreaders one of their classic numbers the Last Straw.
Catch up with the band at:
www.myspace.com/myleonardmusic
www.bebo.com/my-leonard
COVER BAND- YOURS FOR FREECOURTESY OF MEEKIE MONTHLY
-
8/14/2019 Meekie Monthly, Issue 7 (August 2007)
14/29
-
8/14/2019 Meekie Monthly, Issue 7 (August 2007)
15/29
Rugby World Cup PreviewRugby is a complicated game. In a recent study, over 90% of professionalplayers said that they did not understand most of the rules. Worringly, analarming 96% of referees said the same. This month, Meekie Monthlyintroduces the backs, and what they should be doing in theory
The FlyThe FlyThe FlyThe Fly- ---Half (no 10)Half (no 10)Half (no 10)Half (no 10)The fly-half is generally the personwho gets abuse from the crowd for kicking the ball around too much.They also like to try and bluff their
way past defenders. However thisusually results in a horrific tackle andshouts of Why didnt you kick it?
Full back (no 15)Full back (no 15)Full back (no 15)Full back (no 15)Full-backs often look a lonelysight. It is their responsibility to bethe last person to miss the tacklebefore the opposing side score.Often put under a high ball, thefull back is often gets swivel eyesyndrome where they keep one
eye on the ball and the other onthe opposing team closing in onthem. Like to shout Mark a lot
Scrum Half (no 9)Scrum Half (no 9)Scrum Half (no 9)Scrum Half (no 9)The scrum half is the link between the packand the backs. As such, he is the player mostlikely to get late tackled. He has to put the ballinto the scrum in such a way that the first per-son to touch the ball is the second row in his
team. He then takes it out of the scrum wherehe expects it to (unlikely)
Wings (no 11Wings (no 11Wings (no 11Wings (no 11& 14)& 14)& 14)& 14)These speedsters arerarely used in a gameand often get boredand come infield,leaving the forwards
to cover their position.Can cover role of spectator or linesman
Hi. My names Kevin and Imindestructible
Centres (no 12 & 13)Centres (no 12 & 13)Centres (no 12 & 13)Centres (no 12 & 13)There are two centre positionsinside and outside centre. Theinside centres job is to shout tothe No 10, If youd have passedthat then, Id have been in andthe outside centres job is toshout the same thing to the insidecentre.Inside centres like to play crashball where he runs heads firstinto an opponent. This can go
one of two ways a spectacular breakthrough or a visit to the localhospital.
Hi. My names Matt the Handbag and Ienjoy being carried around the pitch
-
8/14/2019 Meekie Monthly, Issue 7 (August 2007)
16/29
-
8/14/2019 Meekie Monthly, Issue 7 (August 2007)
17/29
Big Brother are all the contestants nutters?
Lisa Jeynes
I think since my serieswhen I was put in to stir
it up that producersrealised they needed toput stronger characters
in. (Hey I started thatoff!). Unfortunately, as
the years have gone on
the housemates are{well most of them} arequite unstable to start off with and trying to shock
the viewer, also famehungry. Most of them
amount to nothing whenthey come out.
The Debating
Chamber
What do you thinkDebs?
I think you shouldfok up and go
home
Every month we ask a cross section of the population to cast their thoughts on a topical topic. This month weve spoken toseveral high profile people plus a tabloid columnist. Heres what they had to say about this years Big Brother
The former housemate The rock star
Stuart Cable
I dont watch thatshit mate.!!!!
The beauty queen
Eleanor Glynn(Miss England2006/07)
One answer yes
Imogen Thomas
Apart from one or twoof them...they act like5 year olds carryingteddy bears.!!They need to wakeup to the fact its a
reality show and stop talking about deals theywant when they get out.. You don't necessarily
walk into a TV career from Big Brother
The former housemate
Are they nuts? Hmmm Whilst I may not be the most knowledgeable on the subject due to the fact Igenerally pass-out after watching the twincredibles for more than a couple of minutes I would indeed support this theory: Where else would youfind a six-foot man scared of animals, and a thirty-seven year old woman who collects carrier bags, I ask you?
The tabloid columnist
ClintonHandshandi
-
8/14/2019 Meekie Monthly, Issue 7 (August 2007)
18/29
MEEKIEMEEKIEMEEKIEMEEKIE MONTHLY Page 17Page 17Page 17Page 17
Girls these days dont get to sit down with their grannies andtaught what they should do. There are books on etiquette but itsall outdated like lifting up your littlefinger when drinking from a cup.Who drinks from a cup and saucer any more? From my careful obser-vation of more feminine femalesthan me, I have developed the tenmost important things to remember.Do this and you cant go wrong.
1. Learn to walk in knife-sharp high
heels without falling over.2. Learn to get up gracefully when youfall over.3. Use heels to kill any man wholaughs at you for falling over.4. Insist on drinking with a straw, even when drinking pints of beer.Something to do with your lipstick, I think.
5. Develop the art of putting on makeup in the car without looking likea clown.6. Wait till the car stops before putting in earrings, unless you neednew piercings.7. Cross your legs when wearing a skirt. Unless youre Sharon Stone.8. Always wear good pants. Unless youre Sharon Stone, see above.9. Find your perfect perfume- it should attract men like flies and suffo-cate other women, thus ridding you of competition.10. Pretend to be a lesbian. If you really are a lesbian, pretend yourenot.
Next month: How to go shopping without any money
T he Gi r l s P age
Top Tips on How to be a
Grown Up Woman
By Josie Henley
Bras * Bikinis * Bros * Boobs
www.funkandfashion.co.uk
Indulge in your passion for fashion! We provide bespoke, designer style leather
handbags and purses at affordable prices. All of our products arehandmade, to order from soft Italian calf leather, making themsoft, plushand most of all durable. At special request, bags are
available in manmade leather.
All of our bags are handmade in the UK.
Currently ALL ranges of bags are on sale @ 49.99 eachSave up to 20.00!
- Free p&p on orders over 150 - Current ranges include:
The Metallics Range (4 colours)The Betty Shopper (5 colours)
The Classic (12 colours)
The Spy Range (4 colours)
Web: www.funkandfashion.co.ukEmail: [email protected]
liv e l l
-
8/14/2019 Meekie Monthly, Issue 7 (August 2007)
19/29
MEEKIEMEEKIEMEEKIEMEEKIE MONTHLY Page 18Page 18Page 18Page 18
This month: the live earth message with Joss Stone.
Alright my lovelies? Me again Joss Supersoul Stone ere with tips n tricks Ivemade up to save the world, just like I saved soul music with my supersoul voice.
Well here they are my lovelies:
1 Dont drive to the shops to buy my new CD
2 Dont buy my new CD3 or any of the old ones (theyre just as shit)4 Dont turn your computer on to buy my songs off itunes5 Turn the TV off when I come on6 and the radio
It may not save the planet but itll be the end of my career and thats somethingat least.
On a more serious note what is a really good idea though is to have loads of concerts around the world spunking carbon from the massive amounts of generators theyll need to power the shows. Genius.
t h e e a r t h m u s t
l i v e by Meekie hack, James Harris
Editorial comment: some readers may be previously aware that the author James Harris isnt amassive fan Ms Stone. We respect the fact that James has an opinion on the young singer.
Join Meekie in looking into how you can save theworld with the help of some popstars.
woof
Were all becoming aware of our carbonfootprint, and we should all be workingto reduce ours. Meekie Monthly tells youhow to work yours out and what to doto help the environment.
1. Add together the amount of unitsyou use for gas and electricity
2. Now add together the number of people in your household
3. Add the two figures together 4. Multiply it by ten
5. Add on a number of your choicebetween 1-10006. Multiply this by 497. Add on 7548. Divide it by 69. Think of your favourite colour 10. Add on the amount of letters in the
word of your favourite colour 11. Voila! Your carbon footprint!
Calculate your carbon footprint
HOW TO REDUCEYOUR FOOTPRINT
Meekie Monthly advises
that you chop both your feet off
-
8/14/2019 Meekie Monthly, Issue 7 (August 2007)
20/29
MEEKIEMEEKIEMEEKIEMEEKIE MONTHLY Page 19Page 19Page 19Page 19
Advertise here foras little as
30
per month.Meekie Monthly is a fast growing E-Magazinewith its roots in South Wales but with a global
readership base. You can be part of thisgrowing phenomenon by advertis-ing on our hallowed pages. Just 20
will buy you a full page advert inglorious technicolour, street cred
and exposure to new clients.Email [email protected]
Y o u ?
-
8/14/2019 Meekie Monthly, Issue 7 (August 2007)
21/29
-
8/14/2019 Meekie Monthly, Issue 7 (August 2007)
22/29
Do you care about the Earth or
-
8/14/2019 Meekie Monthly, Issue 7 (August 2007)
23/29
MEEKIEMEEKIEMEEKIEMEEKIE MONTHLY Page 24Page 24Page 24Page 24
1. You bu y a flock o f co ws t
o s a ve you ha v ing to pa y the m ilkm an b
u t un fo r tuna te l y, you r c o ws keep on
fa r t ing and produc ing a lo t o f m e thane gas . Do you?
a ) In vi te friends and famil y round for a nig
h t o f Bo vine P yro technics , where you take a blo w torch to ea ch c
o ws a rse
a nd on de li ver y o f an a ir biscui t, wa tch the
ir faces glo w wi th rap ture and de ligh t?
b) Se ll the co ws to your ma te do wn the pu
b?
c) A t tach a Fa r t Ca tche r de vice , and plu
mb to the gas turbine in your a t tic to produc
e e lec trici t y for the loca l
d) village?
2. Your ne x t doo r neighbou r ins is ts on ta king her 2 ye a r o ld p ip
o f a kid to the nu rs er y do wn the road in
her
4 x4 Hum m er. Rea lising the ha rm tha t s h
e is do ing to the a tmos phere , do you?
a ) Congra tula te your ne ighbour on o wnin
g the la rges t vehicle in the s tree t, a nd s ugge
s ting tha t she ma y wan t to
impro ve the pe r formance o f the car, and th
ere fore ge t ting he r child to nurse r y in record
time , b y fi t ting s i x turbos
and a NoS ki t?
b) Mo ve hous e
c) Sabo tage the Hummer, b y le t ting do wn i ts t yres and pu t ting a ban
ana up the e xhaus t?
3. A loca l MP dec ides tha t he wan ts to
bu ild a m o to r w a y righ t through you r hou
s e . Do yo u?
a) Take the 400 he s o f fe red you for the ho
us e , dri ving s tra igh t to Liquorsa ve and hos ti
ng a la rge org y in a nea rb y
fie ld? b) Look conce rned fo
r a fe w minu te s be fore ca lling round the loc
a l pape r and poin ting a t the place where the
ne w
roa d would be build and looking sa d for the pho
tographer?
c) Climb up in a tree , build yours e l f a tre e-house and thro w apple
s a t the cons truc tion worke rs belo w?
H o w e n v i r o n me n t a l l y
c o n s c i o u s a r e y o u ?
ydo you just going arounddoing what you want? Let
Meekie Monthly answer thatfor you
MEEKIEMONTHLY Page 22MEEKIEMONTHLY Page 22MEEKIEMONTHLY Page 22MEEKIEMONTHLY Page 22
-
8/14/2019 Meekie Monthly, Issue 7 (August 2007)
24/29
ADVERTISEMENT
-
8/14/2019 Meekie Monthly, Issue 7 (August 2007)
25/29
THE MAGAZINE FOR MEN IN WALESwww.redhandedmagazine.co.uk
ADVERTISEMENT
MEEKIEMEEKIEMEEKIEMEEKIE MONTHLY Page 24Page 24Page 24Page 24
-
8/14/2019 Meekie Monthly, Issue 7 (August 2007)
26/29
-
8/14/2019 Meekie Monthly, Issue 7 (August 2007)
27/29
ARIES Ma r 21 - Apr 20 The moon, ris ing up in to Ur
anus is caus ing you te rrible indige s tion this mon th. Luc
kil y, Ne p tune , the plane t
o f dige s ti ve re lie f is ha ving a pos i ti ve e f fe c t on your he a
l th. S till. Tha t doesn t mea n you can go ea ting an y
old rubbish. La y o f f those pickle d eggs i f you can. You
re no t making ma n y friends a nd you ke ep dis appea r-
ing in a green kind o f haze .
TAURUS
Ap r 21 - Ma y 21 You de cide to open your o w
n pub this mon th and a f te r s pla shing ou t 450,000 on a fra nchise a nd re furbis
h-
men t, your grand ope ning nigh t fa lls ra the r fla t when jus
t t wo people turn up- and onl y a s the ir ca r ha d broken
do wn and ne ede d to us e the phone . Unluck y ce le bri t y a
c t to book this mon th Be rnard Ma t the ws .
GEMINI Ma y 22 - J u n 22 Gemini, b y your ve r y na ture
, you a re a flir ta tious pe rs on. You jus t can t s top e ye ing
up the oppos i te se x, tr y-
ing to s ee i f youre in wi th a chance . Bu t th
is can ge t you in to a ll s or ts o f trouble this mon th, es pe ci
a ll y when
you tr y i t on wi th your be s t friends boss . You se e , the yre a lrea d y ha ving i t o f f wi th them a nd
tha t la s t thing
you ne ed is a menage rie a trios . Luck y da y to wea r rub
be r-soled s hoes - the da y you decide to mo w the la wn
in the ra in.
CANCER J u n e 23 - J u l y 23
Ma rs , the plane t o f cu t-price con fe c tiona r y makes an a p
pe a ra nce in your cha r t this mon th and ca use s chaos
wi th your die t. A ne w s hop op
e ns up do wn the road a nd i ts launch da y cons is ts o f pa
ying a fi ve r a nd e a ting
a s much cu t-price con fec tiona r y a s you can. You le a ve hospi ta l a fe w da ys la
te r. Luck y wa rd B2.
LEO J u l y 24 - Au g 23 Oh Leo. I f onl y the re we re e
nough s upe rla ti ve s in the Englis h dic tiona r y to de s cribe
you.
VIRGO Au g 24 - Sep 23
Virgo, you re a ll y do nee d to ge t a grip on tha t bod y odour s i tua tio
n. I t s eems tha t your ina bili t y to was h is los -
ing you a lo t o f frie nds . E ven the dog s i ts do wn the o ther end o f the s e t te e the s e da ys .
Ge t yours e l f do wn to
S upe rdrug and s tock up on s ome sme llie s i t migh t jus t
be the be s t thing you ve done a ll yea r.
H o ro sco p e s w i t h En o g
MEEKIEMONTHLY Page 27MEEKIEMONTHLY Page 27MEEKIEMONTHLY Page 27MEEKIEMONTHLY Page 27
-
8/14/2019 Meekie Monthly, Issue 7 (August 2007)
28/29
LIBRA Sep t 2 4 - Oc t 23
Plu to, the plane t o f hea v y workloa
ds, brings i ts de ligh t ful presence t
o your char t this mon th. And you though t you had i t
tough working 80 hours a week. Y
es , un for tuna tel y, things are abou t
to ge t e ven tougher. Ho we ver, Ne
p tune, the plane t
o f ligh t re lie f, mo ves in to your char t
a t the end o f Augus t, and wi th i t,
a da y o f f. Luck y da y to pla y Richa
rd and Jud y s
Phone In Scam Tuesda y.
S CORPIO Oc t 2 4 - No v 2 2
Se x y Scorpio. So se x y, tha t e ven t
he Church Warden wan ts to ha ve an a f fair wi th you. Be ca
re ful who you
share your juices wi th this mon th S
corpio tha t looker you pick up from
the church fe te has go t a war t problem
do wns tairs and you could be impl
ica ted in a church scandal.
S AGI T TARIUS
No v 23 - Dec 21
No thing much to shou t abou t this mon
th Sagi t tarius . In fac t, i f I were you
, I 'd wri te o f f Jul y and ge t s tar ted o
n
Augus t a mon th earl y.
CAPRICORN
Dec 2 2 - J an 20
Capricorns can e xpec t a varied mo
n th in June. There 'll be some good
da ys and some bad da ys . There 'll
be some da ys in be-
t ween and some da ys tha t are mo
re da ys tha t are be t ter than the ba
d da ys and some da ys tha t will be
badder than the
be t ter da ys . I kno w I sa id this las t m
on th, bu t tha t s wha t the char t sa ys
.
AQUARIUS
J an 21 - Feb 1 9
Tha t goes for you too.
PISCES Feb 20 - Mar 20
Pisces can e xpec t a lo t o f lo ve this
mon th wi th the arri val o f Venus in
your char t. I t means tha t you will h
a ve to s tar t
washing again and a lso brushing your tee th wou
ldn t be a bad thing ei ther. Be care f
ul no t to hur t an yone s feelings tho
ugh
mou th wash should do the
trick
MEEKIEMONTHLY Page 28MEEKIEMONTHLY Page 28MEEKIEMONTHLY Page 28MEEKIEMONTHLY Page 28
H o ro sco p e s w i t h En o g
N e x t m o n t h : n e x t m o n t h s h o r o s c o p e s
-
8/14/2019 Meekie Monthly, Issue 7 (August 2007)
29/29
Due to the international ban on football, we are
unable to bring you any sport at all. We are verysorry for the inconvenience caused and wouldlike to recommend reading Readers Friend as an
alternative source of excitement
Sport
MEEKIEMEEKIEMEEKIEMEEKIE MONTHLY Page 29Page 29Page 29Page 29