The Enjoy-Yourself-to-Sleep Method

If you’d like your before-sleep activities to:

… Not continue the day’s dietary deprivation, but allow you to indulge a little,

… Not be boring and like work, (but

all about enjoyment and entertainment), … Not become weird or woo-woo, just because they're

healthy but allow you to do stuff you love (watch Netflix orwhatever),

… Have nothing to do with perfection, and all to do with relaxation,

…Then you should probably continue reading.

Because that’s what this method is all about.

If you already have a sense people that you know would need something like this

–a way to get sleepy entertaining enough that they'll see no reason to drug themselves (watch 5 hours of things they don't even enjoy, 5 bows of Ben & Jerry's or whatever)a way let go, at the end of the day, which leads to sleep rather than keeps them awake - then it will take you 1 sec to share this with those people, and you do it

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This is the “enjoy yourself” night ritual method. No deprivation, and no going to bed knowing the whole day was essentially "work" (only to wake up to hell

again in the morning). Instead, we schedule & ritualize what we wish we were always doing; letting go,

relaxing and recharging.

Let’s get into it.

Clearly distinguish awake-time and sleep-time

Sleep-time starts at a set time that you decide. Why set..? Because, in

order for your body to actually make something a habit, it needs to be

exact. Deciding on 9pm (or whatever) as the time when "sleep starts", and then repeating it will set a new rule for the body to follow (and it adapts a

hell of a lot faster than we’d think; only we never find out because we keep forcing our bodies in the wrong direction).

By the way, does 9pm sound boring…? It’s definitely not. I never said,

“sleep time means going straight to bed” or “sleep time equals boring

yourself to death”. Not at all. The exact opposite, in fact - we go full throttle in the opposite direction :).

Sleep time is when you switch from work-mode to

enjoy-mode.

So, in essence: the method is about carving out time for yourself –

and schedule it - every day, to just let go, relax and enjoy

yourself. It's like a meeting at work. ...Only awesome.

Actually, you know what…? From now on we’ll refer to it 100% as enjoy-mode.

I thought this would be a good point to make, before elaborating on any

of this. Batteries need recharging, and relaxation and enjoyment is how it's done. So, whenever you catch yourself thinking “I should be

working – can’t shut off at 9 pm”, remind yourself that "Enjoyment

now=tomorrow I'm getting more done".

Ritualize enjoyment Why: Much better sleep. You allow the body to get back to its natural state

(9pm is when it naturally starts preparing for sleep, but also 10:30 or 11pm

is a hell of a lot better than staying up with lights on, working away until

2am . …That moment of “waking up again” is our bodies turning into using

spare batteries; and, as you might have guessed, doing that every single

day isn’t exactly good. …Especially not with bad sleep added on-top).

Ritualized enjoyment at the end of every day restores batteries. It shuts off the dulling, subconscious work-obsession. You know, that place where you’re not quite working, yet not quite letting it go; and thereby

wasting time you should’ve spent with your family (in a way that doesn’t

give you results, which keeps gnawing at you, your life quality and your

family time, day in and day out until – hopefully – you wake up, some

day, and decide it’s time for a change).

With this little x-pm ritual in place, you will know that - at a certain time,

every day - you’re going to stop working and enjoy myself. Non-

negotiably. Whatever you do, at that point, is not work. …Not until you

legitimately find a way to unite the two (and, if you’re anything like I was,

you’re far from it now).

How:

Enjoyment and relaxation=productivity

Before going into the step-by-step action items, I want to hint at what we’re

getting at here… We’ll attack this from several angles – using sound,

clothing, stuff we do and alarms (yep, probably a weird-sounding combo).

Let’s look at the action items…

1. Decide on a time for moving over to enjoy-time. 9pm is ideal, and easier than you think (you really don't have to be asleep really soon

– can just make sure you're really relaxed, while watching a movie).

2. Create a daily cellphone reminder, 30min before, or so (this reminder tells you enjoy-mode is up).

3. Set an actual alarm – there has to be sound (which I think is default

with cellphone alarms) – going off at the moment you want to make

the enjoy-time switch). Why…? It will act just like the bells that, in

school, told us class was over (or just like Mazlov’s dogs, if you know

of that story; they started drooling, when they heard the sound of

bells, because they *knew* food was coming). In other words: It tells

our bodies – nervous system, brain, whatever - that it’s time to change what we’re doing. Makes it way easier, and – slowly but surely – automatizes the work-to-sleep-mode-switch

4. Create a vibe of relaxation and sleepiness. Think of clothing or

beverages or music that get you relaxed… Anything you associate with

relaxation is what you want. And whatever lacks association to work. If you wouldn’t do it, think it or wear it at work, it’s probably the right thing. The idea is to think of anything that comes naturally when you think "enjoy-mode". No activities yet - just the stuff to wear, drink, eat or listen

to. It’s the vibe we’re after – so anything in the world that you associate to

relaxation and sleepiness is perfect.

4. Think of activities you want to engage in. This can be anything – but,

to make it more compelling, make it the kind of stuff you never allow

yourself to do anymore. The things you wish you gave yourself time to, but

that you think you’ve “grown out of”; because you’re a “serious adult”, now.

Well, you know what…? Fuck serious adult – we live once and, given how

you bust your ass every day, you deserve some rejuvenation (and,

besides, it will probably make your ass-busting more productive).

Maybe, since you began dealing with business, you feel that video games

isn’t “acceptable” (again, the serious adult chiming in with words of self-

help wisdom). Well, you know what…? If playing video games relaxes you

and gives you joy, while overworking steals time from your family, years

from your life and makes you depressed… Who’s the serious adult now?

Pick an activity as childish as possible, relaxing as possible or that you lose yourself in.

Make the ritual easy, fun & sustainable

We're told - by guru 1, guru 2 or guru 3 - that we need rituals. We may

have even tried getting one (maybe you have one, lying on your mental

shelf, collecting dust, taking up space and sucking energy). Well, what

most people don’t tell us is that we're imperfect. …That our life

experiences have taken us to different places and headspaces; which means a lot of things won't work for me, or you, personally. In addition, we

haven’t got unlimited willpower

(especially at the end of the day), so pretending we will do anything we set our minds to is stupid. We won't -- we need ways to make what needs to be done easy and fun, so it becomes sustainable.

So, let’s have a look at how that’s done.

a)Be flexible. We cannot ever allow this to be rigid. Rigid means work and work definitely doesn't mean enjoy-mode. Above, I tell

you to pick certain things just to get started and get an idea of this

whole thing. But, after that point – and at any other point – you’re more than welcome to venture outside the box. Be flexible in

any way that fits and makes sense to you. If your work glues you to

a screen, alone, all day long while you’re an extrovert, then

perhaps watching a movie isn’t what you should be doing but go

out and meet people. Have a look at your situation, try things, see what happens and act according to what did happen.

Don’t bore yourself. Ever. No need. If you’re grown tired of x podcast, find

a new one (and if you can’t find a new one in x category, go to y; maybe it

will have things in common, with x, so you learn new things, enrich your

life or makes your ritual more interesting and easier to maintain).

If x music no longer excites/relaxes you, find a new one. Other people

have spotify-playlists you can check out, you can go on allmusic.com and

find related bands, you can go on the tune-in radio app to find awesome

radio channels with your kind of music (introducing you to new groups and

bands).

If you’re not into step-by-step things, then don’t make it a step-by-step

ritual. You could include some things as permanent items, but make those

the stuff like “pouring glass of water”, rather than “watch x kind of

movie” (or even “watch movie”). This isn’t about the activity but the

result. c) Play around with everything, all the time

If you feel like doing x thing, do x thing, if you feel like play some not-

so-relaxing music tonight, then do that. Just, just play.

d) In the beginning, the habit is the only thing to think about

…And, for that to happen, the right relationship to your ritual is the one andonly priority – go into full-on enjoy-mode or just don’t bother. You DON’T

want to be bored or feel like you’re back in school, because then this will never become part of life. Long-term is the only term – aim at making it automatic for you in 6 months – rather than perfection tomorrow. …

Because perfection won't happen. And it wouldn’t matter if it did, or even

be good, because;

1. One day's results is one day’s results (you can only get 100% today, but 50% times 30 - the days of a month - is 15x as much as a day can produce)

2. Perfection would bore the fuck out of you and set standards that could

never become automatic. And automatic=definition of habitual.

Perfection-minded would mean: only fresh spinach with no spices.

Put gasoline on your enjoyment-fireb)

Habit-minded would mean: making sure to always wilt spinach into yourpasta sauce (100% taste-neutral & impossible to notice for anyone).Takes 2 minutes, you'll never notice it and you'll feel good as hell about having done it.

Perfection: 30min of meditation, in complete silence and crosslegged,

two times a day.

Habit: A deep breath first thing when you wake up (you can always do ten more, but starting will never be hard).

Three final thoughts on this little method 1. Just have fun and start moving toward the goal. You’re not yet in a

place where your body naturally shuts down and “goes to sleep”.

You’re not there yet, and no one knows when you’ll get there, but you

can take action and you can make every action enjoyable, relaxing

and inspiring (it's essentially a choice between habitually druggingyourself at night, and feeling like shit 90% while doing it, or have funand feel great).

2.Whenever you get bored, instantly switch things around to do whatyou enjoy, get excited doing or are inspired by. It may not be the

most relaxing thing but it’s the one you can keep doing (and,

besides, your ability to pick the best things, as well as how relaxed

you are naturally, will improve over time).

3. Do whatever you want, as long as it’s relaxing or enjoyable.

Most important things to

remember: Batteries need recharging, and relaxing, enjoying yourself is the way

to recharge them

This isn’t about an activity but a result.

the right relationship to this is the one and only priority – make it

enjoy-time or just don’t bother

DONE So, what do you think…? It's

important that you actually do

something about your sleep.

If you did like this, how are you going

to make sure this becomes second-

nature in your life…? Not saying you

will necessarily do the exact same

things, but how will you make sure

your days end with relaxation,

enjoyment and time to let go…? I

mean, it’s your life. You can’t wait for

it. If you want any feedback, I’m more

than happy to give it to you. If you’d

like it, just hit me up (and why not add

me) at:

Email: simonhaestoe@gmail.com

Twitter: @LetUsReinvent

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/simon.hasto.9

Linked-in: https://se.linkedin.com/pub/simon-hästö/23/22/b65

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