Essay Writing

Level 2 and 3 History

A cunning Plan• You should always start your essay by

following a formula.

• Try using the following:1. READ the question2. HIGHLIGHT the important

ideas/dates/names.3. Construct a PLAN

1. Mind Map2. Brainstorm3. Bullet Points

4. NUMBER the points in logical order.5. WRITE! WRITE! WRITE!

Start at the Begininng1. READ the question.

2. HIGHLIGHT the important ideas/dates/names.

Explain the factors that led to the decision to present Maori with the Treaty of Waitangi in 1840. Evaluate the consequences of the treaty signing for Maori during the nineteenth century.

Organise your ideas

1. Construct a PLAN• Mind Map• Brainstorm• Bullet Points

2. NUMBER the points in logical order.

the decision to present Maori with the Treaty in 1840. consequences of the treaty for Maori during the nineteenth century.

HumanitarianConcerns

Lawlessness inKororareka

IllegalLand deals

Loss of Land

ForeignInterest in NZ

Loss of Rangatiratanga

NZWars

1 2

34

5

67

MarginalisationFrom

Society

8

The Basic Essay• In general, essay writing is a

straightforward exercise.• It requires the writer to take a

viewpoint or argument and then write a sustained justification supporting that idea.

• You will have been taught that Essays are made up of an Introduction, a Body and a Conclusion.

Saying it...• At University I was told that an essay is in three parts....

• Saying what you will say.• Saying it.• Saying what you said.

• I got my first ‘A’ when I tried it.

Introduction

• The Introduction is where the writer will outline their viewpoint/argument and the main points that will be used to justify their ideas.

• Be Brief, the main points are only indicators of what you will be writing.

• Short sentences always work best.

Explain the factors that led to the decision to present Maori with the Treaty of Waitangi in 1840. Evaluate the consequences of the treaty signing for Maori during

the nineteenth century. (With annotations in italics)

• “In 1840 Britain made the decision to annex New Zealand to Britain. The decision made by the British representative Hobson, to do this through a treaty has left many consequences over land, settlement and the Kingitanga for Maori during the nineteenth century.”

• * In your introduction try to show the factors you will discuss later. This should start by hinting at the idea of Humanitarianism, Imperialism and Justice…and then the consequences…. Loss of land & Mana, decline in population economic and political power.

• In 1840 Britain chose to annex New Zealand through a Treaty because of events in the 1830’s that occurred in here and in Europe. These included recognition of a letter, a declaration and a flag by British institutions. Humanitarian concerns included the negative effects that contact was having on Maori. Also the belief that systematic migration that would result in conflict. Interest being shown by other western nations was also a concern. The consequence of the signing would see the extension of British authority into most parts of the country , the arrival of tens of thousands of migrants. Conflict with Maori led to significant declines in their economic and political power.

A weak Intro. Gives no reasons for the decision

only names results without any detail

My Comment to the student

While not perfect this introduction covers most of the bases.

The Body• The Body is where the

justifications are made.• This is through LINKED

paragraphs.• In history the paragraphs are

in a logical (usually chronological) order that helps to build your argument.

• Each paragraph should be in a TEX(AS) format whenever possible.

• AVOID pure narrative.

Avoid the Narrative Trap• In your essay you should

concentrate on explaining WHY events happened.

• OR• The CONSEQUENCES of an

event• NOT JUST A DESCRIPTION of

what actually happened.• Examiners see excessive

narrative as ‘waffle’ which the student uses to disguise their lack of knowledge.

Spot the Narrative...• The primary aim of the humanitarian movement was to abolish slavery in all parts of the British

world and to promote the rights and welfare of non-European peoples. The Church Missionary Society (the CMS) was a large and influential humanitarian organisation of Anglican faith, based in London. In 1804, its reach extended to the developing colony of New South Wales. It was from here that the highly prosperous and evangelical CMS agent, Samuel Marsden, cultivated an interest in the Maori people of New Zealand. Marsden was a man of success. In the year after moving to Sydney Cove in 1794, he had established a thriving 100-acre farm block.

• A year later, he had become a magistrate. Over the next few years, his ascendancy grew to include a growing estate and a large spiritual and political influence over the South Pacific. After holding the position of chaplain of New South Wales for over 10 years, Marsden grew deeply tired of working with convicts. In New Zealand, Marsden saw a cause more worthy of his energies. This enthusiasm arose from the close relationships he shared with Maori chiefs who visited Sydney. From Te Pahi in 1805 and subsequent meetings with Maori, he saw a willingness to embrace the offerings of Europe. Marsden saw great potential in the Maori. He saw that they shared his entrepreneurial doggedness and would be worthy subjects of the CMS’ philosophy to “civilize and convert.” However, to Marsden’s distress, Maori were being exposed to what he would have seen as the evils of European society.

Identifying the narrative• The primary aim of the humanitarian movement was to abolish slavery in all parts of the

British world and to promote the rights and welfare of non-European peoples. The Church Missionary Society (the CMS) was a large and influential humanitarian organisation of Anglican faith, based in London. In 1804, its reach extended to the developing colony of New South Wales. It was from here that the highly prosperous and evangelical CMS agent, Samuel Marsden, cultivated an interest in the Maori people of New Zealand. Marsden was a man of success. In the year after moving to Sydney Cove in 1794, he had established a thriving 100-acre farm block.

• A year later, he had become a magistrate. Over the next few years, his ascendancy grew to include a growing estate and a large spiritual and political influence over the South Pacific. After holding the position of chaplain of New South Wales for over 10 years, Marsden grew deeply tired of working with convicts. In New Zealand, Marsden saw a cause more worthy of his energies. This enthusiasm arose from the close relationships he shared with Maori chiefs who visited Sydney. From Te Pahi in 1805 and subsequent meetings with Maori, he saw a willingness to embrace the offerings of Europe. Marsden saw great potential in the Maori. He saw that they shared his entrepreneurial doggedness and would be worthy subjects of the CMS’ philosophy to “civilize and convert.” However, to Marsden’s distress, Maori were being exposed to what he would have seen as the evils of European society.

Narrative-less• Below is the same text as previous slides without the excess narrative.

• The primary aim of the humanitarian movement was to promote the rights and welfare of non-European peoples. The Church Missionary Society (the CMS) was a large and influential humanitarian organisation of Anglican faith, based in London. In 1804, its reach extended to the developing colony of New South Wales. It was from here that Samuel Marsden, cultivated an interest in the Maori. Marsden saw a cause more worthy of his energies. From Te Pahi in 1805 and subsequent meetings with Maori, he saw a willingness to embrace the offerings of Europe. Marsden saw great potential in the Maori. He saw that they shared his entrepreneurial doggedness and would be worthy subjects of the CMS’ philosophy to “civilize and convert.”

T.E.X.A.S.• Topic - the main point/statement• Explanation - evidence that

supports the statement.• eXample - an example that supports

the explanation.• Analysis - how this idea links to the

main argument.• Summary – How it links to your next

idea/paragraph.

• Keep your sentence short.

T. E. X. A. S.• Below is the previous text broken into its TEXAS components.

• The primary aim of the humanitarian movement was promote the rights and welfare of non-European peoples.

• The Church Missionary Society (the CMS) was a large and influential humanitarian organisation of Anglican faith, based in London. In 1804, its reach extended to the developing colony of New South Wales.

• It was from here that Samuel Marsden, cultivated an interest in the Maori. Marsden saw a cause more worthy of his energies. From Te Pahi in 1805 and subsequent meetings with Maori, he saw a willingness to embrace the offerings of Europe.

• Marsden saw great potential in the Maori. • He saw that they shared his entrepreneurial doggedness and would be worthy subjects of

the CMS’ philosophy to “civilize and convert.”

• The NEXT paragraph is on “Civilise and Convert”...

To Conclude...• The conclusion ties up all of your

ideas and should prove that your main argument is true.

• Repeat your main idea/argument.• Briefly reiterate your main points

without repeating too much information.

• If running short of time (<10 min) finish the paragraph you are on and move to the conclusion.

• Keep sentences short.