EXACT LANGUAGEChapter 32

USE SPECIFIC & DETAILED VOCABULARY

Using exact language involves paying very close attention to the words you use

It’s accomplished by: forming strong nouns and verbs cutting wordiness & repetition avoiding clichés using standard English

A PROOFREADING TASKThese are some common vague words I see in students’ writing. Do a quick scan through your draft for these words and consider replacing them with exact language:

• Everyone• Everything• Anything • Something• Thing or things• Good• Bad• Kind of (kinda is not a

word)• Sort of (sorta is not a

word)

• A lot• Definitely (definately is

not a word, and defiantly means something entirely different)

• Little or a little• Nice• Really • Very

HOW DO I PROOFREAD?

1. Look through your previous drafts Determine which of vague words you tend to use

from the list on the previous slide For example, maybe you notice you use the word everyone and definitely often

2. Look through your current essay Look for each word you know you have a

tendency to use often Look for everyone (or whatever word you have a

tendency to use often) Circle each use of the word

Replace each circled word with a more exact word or phrase

SOME ADVICE

Don’t fluff your paper up with extra words simply to meet length requirements (for any class).

To add length, it’s better to add examples, description, details, or explanation than to simply add more words.

Use only as many words or phrases as you need to fully explain your ideas.

PRACTICE

How can these sentences be changed to be less wordy?1. In August 2007, five men entered an art museum on the French Rivieria for the purpose of stealing paintings.2. The whole entire robbery lasted for ten minutes.3. It is a true fact that many paintings are stolen for wealthy private collectors.4. The FBI estimates that, on yearly basis, the market for stolen art is $6 billion annually.

SOME PRACTICE--ANSWERS

1. In August 2007, five men entered an art museum on the French Rivieria to steal paintings.2. The [whole entire] robbery lasted for ten minutes.At least one of these words should be deleted; neither of them are needed.3. Many paintings are stolen for wealthy private collectors.The words “It is a true fact that” are not needed.4. The FBI estimates the market for stolen art is $6 billion annually.The words “that, on yearly basis,” are not needed; the word “annually” captures the same idea in one word.

USING APPOSITIVES

Appositive– a word or phrase that gives further information about a noun or pronoun. Using the appositive is one way to avoid wordiness or unnecessary repetition in your writing.

APPOSITIVES (CONT.)

These can be used to join two simple sentences (or complex sentences) in a more formal way, eliminate unnecessary repetition, and add sentence variety.

OkaySherlock Homes was a famous detective.He was helped by Dr. Watson who was his

friend.

BetterSherlock Holmes, the famous detective,

was helped by his friend, Dr. Watson.

EXAMPLES OF APPOSITIVES

Sherlock Holmes, the famous detective, was helped by his friend, Dr. Watson.

During the dinner conversation, Clifford, the messiest eater at the table, spewed mashed potatoes like an erupting volcano.

Genette's bedroom desk, the biggest disaster area in the house, is a collection of overdue library books, dirty plates, computer components, old mail, cat hair, and empty potato chip bags.

COMMA RULE?

Based on the examples, what do you think the rule is for comma use with these kinds of words/phrases? Sherlock Holmes, the famous detective, was

helped by his friend, Dr. Watson. During the dinner conversation, Clifford, the

messiest eater at the table, spewed mashed potatoes like an erupting volcano.

Genette's bedroom desk, the biggest disaster area in the house, is a collection of overdue library books, dirty plates, computer components, old mail, cat hair, and empty potato chip bags.

COMMA RULE

Always place a comma on each side of the appositive.

If the appositive comes at the end of the sentence, then you’ll only have one comma before it (rather than two).

Sherlock Holmes, the famous detective, was helped by his friend, Dr. Watson.

During the dinner conversation, Clifford, the messiest eater at the table, spewed mashed potatoes like an erupting volcano.

Genette's bedroom desk, the biggest disaster area in the house, is a collection of overdue library books, dirty plates, computer components, old mail, cat hair, and empty potato chip bags.

APPOSITIVES: YOUR TURN

Try joining the following sentences together and using an appositive. Make sure to punctuate it correctly!My brother’s car is the envy of my friends.

It is a sporty red Mustang with leather seats and an Alpine stereo system.

John F. Kennedy was one of the most popular U.S. presidents.

John F. Kennedy was known for his eloquent and inspirational speeches.

APPOSITIVES: YOUR TURN--ANSWERS

My brother’s car, a sporty red Mustang with leather seats and an Alpine stereo system, is

the envy of my friends.

John F. Kennedy, known for his eloquent and inspirational speeches, was one of the most

popular U.S. presidents.

CLICHÉS: AVOID THEM LIKE THE PLAGUE!Cliché—an overused expression.The Problem:

They’ve lost their power.They aren’t interesting.

Instead, strive for new, interesting ways of expressing your ideas.

CLICHÉS: AVOID THEM LIKE THE PLAGUE!

all walks of life Curiosity killed the cat Let sleeping dogs lie

apple of my eye fall on deaf ears Love is blind

best thing since sliced bread fit as a fiddle

Money is the root of all evil.

Blood is thicker than water

have your cake and eat it too

Money makes the world go round.

bitter end Home is where the heart is. never a dull moment

can't see the forest for the trees.

hook, line, and sinker nipped in the bud

calm before the storm in the nick of time sands of time

chomping at the bit in the same boat stick out like a sore thumb

cool as a cucumber leaps and bounds winds of change

cry over spilled milk leave no stone unturned writing on the wall

STANDARD ENGLISH

Standard American English—the common language generally used and expected in schools, businesses, and government institutions in the U.S.

More formalUsed in writing

Important! Always use Standard American English in college writing projects and professional writing situations.

SLANG

Slang—nonstandard language. It is used in informal situations to communicate common cultural knowledge.

It’s less formalIt’s how we talk

Does this sound familiar? Remember the “Reader-Based Prose” reading from the first week of class?

Slang would be used in writer-based prose.

It can change depending on religious, cultural, historical, influences