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Thanksgiving Message

I guess this story may now be told. Last Wednesday morning, Fr. Provincial sent me

a text message, requesting for a meeting in the early evening of the same day. After

agreeing to the meeting, I was very anxious the rest of the day. May problema nanaman ba?

What if my ordination did not push through? Relatives from abroad are coming home,friends have fixed their schedulespeople are coming to the ordination! What if I am not

included?

When I finally got to meet Fr. Jojo, he asked me what I thought about being sent to

East Timor. He said that he thought of sending me because the work involved someone

who had experience in a school. He also told me that I could say no to the assignment

which meant that he would look for someone else and added that he hopes that I seriously

consider the mission. I told him that I needed time to pray over the matter. He agreed and

gave me Friday as the deadline for my response. He also gave me strict instructions not to

tell anyone about our meeting and what we had just talked about.

The next two days were spent in prayer. I brought to prayer three concerns and theLord made clear three things as well:

1. Am I prepared for this mission?

My prayer brought me back to the years I have spent in teaching: the time when Iwas an accidental JVP volunteer, when I bumped into Bro. Dunne who invited me to

teach English at the Ateneo High School, when Ms. Chee Kee came to my house to

convince my parents to allow me to teach, my leaving Ateneo to work in a bank, only

to return to teaching, how Ms. Dela Cruz encouraged me to stay in teaching, my

years spent teaching Math at the LS and being a slave (teaching assistant) of Fr.

Nemy Que in his Ethics class when I was studying my Philosophy, and the yearsspent teaching in the high school and college during Theology. And here I am asking

if I am ready for this mission?

Thank all the administrators, supervisors, co-teachers [former teachers andstudents who eventually became my co-teachers] and students [especially those

whom I flunked and became my good friends plus their parents] of Immaculate

Heart of Mary Academy in Mati, Ateneo de Manila GS/HS/LS, Ateneo de Davao HS

(regency), and Ateneo de Iloilo (super-regency)

I would also like to thank all my Grade School, High School, College, Education,Juniorate, Philosophy, Theology teachers. They say that teachers teach the way they

were taught. The many and varied examples of teaching and being a teacher has

given me enough ingredients to work with as I tried to come up with my own brandof teaching.

I would like to especially mention my Philosophy teachers who schooled my mindand my spiritual directors who have schooled my heart; somehow philosophy and

Jesuit spirituality [especially the Spiritual Exercises] has changed the way I teach

Math. I have slowly realized that the study of math is not about theorems and

axioms but a desire to understand a worldthe principles that govern itwith a

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desire to know ones self and his limits and the opportunity to allow ones self to be

amazed when one gets an insight about Him, the Truth who is behind all this.

I bring with me many stories of hopeteachers struggling to continue dedicatingthemselves to their vocation despite the challenges (personal and especially

financial), students who failed or dismissed from the Ateneo and now lead good

lives. I bring all that I have learned of what it means to be a true educator with meas I prepare for my first assignment in East Timor.

2. I would have wanted to share my priesthood with my family and friends, to be with

them in the key moments of their faith journeybaptize their children, officiate at their

weddings, bring healing and hope in times of despair due to sin, sickness, or death.

But the Lord reminded me that being a priest does not mean that I own mypriesthood. Rather, I share in his priesthood; therefore, I share in his mission. It is

not a matter for me to decide what I want to do or whom I wish to serve. This is his

mission and I must go where he wants me to go, I must serve those whom he sendsto me.

Thank family and friends mama, papa [POC patient: you father must be very happywherever he is right now because of the good work you are doing.] siblings; aunts

and uncles; cousins; friends I have met in ministry.

My parents went to daily morning masses, cousins prayed devoutly in church,uncles and aunts who were devoted to the Santo Entierro in Lipa. The times I joined

the Good Friday processions were really simply a walk around the townenjoying

the sites and watching the people. Honestly, you were strange to me back then. It

was only when I became a Jesuit did I have a deep appreciation of the deep

religiositythe utter dependence and complete trust you have in the Lord.

I also think about my friends who are in search for meaning in their lives, whostruggle to find God in their lives. You will be okay for there are many other

searchers and pilgrims you will meet in your spiritual journey.

Even if I cannot be with you in the important events in your life while I am in EastTimor, rest assured of my constant prayers for you.

3. Finally, I looked back in the years that I have spent in formation, the difficult years of

formation when I was deferred for the vows and for regency, and the many challenges I had

to face while I was till studying Theology. Undoubtedly, the twelve years I spent in

formation were difficult and yet, never in my wildest dreams did I ever imagine that I

would get this far. And happen it did, not by my own efforts and struggles, but by thegraciousness of God, dahil sa awa ng Panginoon as the good cardinal had said.

The Lord has been very merciful and gracious to me. How can I say no to such aGod?

And so, I finally sent a message to Fr. Jojo: Yes, I will go. Originally, I wanted to sayYes, you may send me. But it sounded so tentative and when I go back to the fruits

of my prayer, I just felt that I had to say something more definitive: Yes, I will go.

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I would like to especially thank fellow Jesuits who were very helpful to me duringthese formative years:

o Robert Rivera: who got the application form for me and gently pressured meto accomplish the form and turn it in;

o Eric Eusebio: who helped me fill in my form: Ano ka ba for priesthood orbrotherhood? And when I could not decide, he said: for Priesthood ka.

o Frs. Bill McGarry (first spiritual director ever), Noel Vasquez, Mon Bautista(novitiate and juniorate) , Bill Abbot, Tony de Castro (philosophy), Jett

Villarin (regency), and Noel Vasquez again (Theology)

o Jesuits who accompanied me in my troubled years: Frs. Art Borja, ArnieBugtas, Benny Calpotura and Roger Champeux. For those who know these

Jesuits, you now have an idea that my concerns were more than spiritual.

o And to all the superiors, formators , and members, of the Jesuit communities Ibelonged tothe Novitiate, Loyola House, Dagani House, Ateneo de Davao,

and Ateneo de Iloilo, our conversations ranged from the very mundane to the

spiritual, our relationships were one of love and hurt (not hate). In the end,

one is just amazed how such a motley crew can allow itself to be united bythe One who has called each one of us. Thank you for the memories.

o Friends of the Jesuits who never ceased to encourage us, who supported oursuperiors in our formation, and who shared their own stories of faith, thank

you very much.