By Mel Gagnon

Gagnon Family Collage

“Families have been described according to blood ties and legal ties, as networks of persons who live together over periods of time supporting each other, and as groups of people who have ties of marriage and kinship to one another” (Galvin, Bylund, Brommel, p. 4).

Definition

To most people my family would be considered blended, although I don’t really see it like that. It’s technically “blended” because my brother is actually my half brother, from my father’s previous marriage, but I’ve always seen him as simply my brother.

Family Type

Cohesive – Family members strive for emotional closeness, loyalty, and togetherness with emphasis on some individuality.

In my family, we can talk about anything, yet we tend not to, even though we know we can. We’re a close family, but some of us keep more to ourselves when it comes to serious topics. Recently my mother was diagnosed with breast cancer, which has put this weird feeling among the family. My mom has no problem talking about it. My dad hasn’t said a word to me about it, my sister and I pretend it’s not happening, and my brother tries to be the supporter. We all have different levels of what we’re comfortable with discussing. I talk more about it with my friends, even though I know my families there.

Communication Functions

My families image would be a dog. A dog symbolizes, “a mans best friend.” You can always rely on your dog, and I can always rely on my family. No matter what the situation, we’re all there for each other in different ways. Pictured below is me with our two dogs, Comet and Clover.

Image

When I was younger, we would go to the coast and beach every year and go on vacation at least once a year. A big tradition is the holidays. Thanksgiving and Christmas day are always at my house and the whole family comes over. On Christmas Eve we go to Grandma’s, Pepere’s, and Memere’s – same order, same time, every year.

Rituals

Humor is a huge part of my family. My brother and I are the comedians, although everyone has a great sense of humor. Our most memorable moments are when we sit at the dinner table and share hilarious things that happened to us that day. The day after we heard mom has breast cancer, we started making jokes. It’s our way of coping, trying not to think about how serious it really is. Over the years I’ve kept a Gagnon family quote book, filling it with funny things that happened/were said, so we can always remember them.

Stories and Humor

Dad – provides main income, does outside chores. More apt to share feelings with Matt, than Rach or I. Go to him for advice on big purchases, such as cars.

Family Roles

Mom – Second source of income. Cooks and cleans, takes care of pets during the day. The one you get advice from about every day things. Knows about our social lives and what we’re up to. Has the most power in the house. Makes most decisions, but discusses it with dad depending on how big it is. Usually wins fights.

Matt – Brother/son. The oldest. The big shot, very successful, favored among our grandmother. The comforter among the siblings. Puts dad in his place when need be.

Roles Continued

Rachel – Sister/daughter. Second oldest. Getting a degree in Library Sciences. Very level headed, the smart one, responsible. I’m more apt to tell her things because we’re closer in age and Matt lives in Texas.

Me – Sister/daughter. Youngest. I’m the spoiled one, the one who got away with the most. I’m more apt to speak up to my parents than Rachel. The sarcastic one. Family photographer/historian

According to Hochschild’s marital ideology role types, my parents would be considered transitional. “The transitional husband and wife see the wife’s identity as the provider. The wife identifies with home management as a role, although she also wishes to identify with her work. Transitional husbands don’t mind that their wives work, but also expect them to take most of the home responsibility” (Galvin, Bylund, Brommel, p.171). My father is the main provider in my house. My mother works at home with her own business on Ebay. When my siblings and I were babies, my mother would stay home with us all day and work nights when my father got home.

Typology

I define family as the group of people in your life that love you unconditionally no matter what and who are always there for you. To me, family doesn’t have to be blood related. My friends are just as easily a part of my family as much as say, my sister. Family is what/who you want it to be.

Personal Definition

Galvin, K.M., Bylund, C.L., & Brommel, B.J. (2012). Family Communication and Change. Indianapolis: Allyn and Bacon.

Work Cited