INTERPERSONAL COMMUNICATION

CHAPTER TEN RELATIONSHIPS PART 3- FRIENDSHIPS AND

ROMANCE

PREVIEW: FRIENDSHIP ROMANTIC RELATIONSHIPS 

DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP

QUESTIONS TO BE ANSWERED:

 WHAT ARE FRIENDSHIPS?

 HOW DO FRIENDSHIPS CHANGE OVER TIME?

 HOW DO FRIENDSHIPS AT

DIFFERENT STAGES OF LIFE DIFFER?

 WHAT ARE SIMILARITIES AND DIFFERENCES OF SAME SEX

AND CROSS SEX FRIENDSHIPS?

LEVELS OF HUMAN RELATIONSHIPS

1. ACQUAINTANCES2. WORKPLACE RELATIONSHIPS3. FRIENDS4. FAMILY5. ROMANTIC PARTNERS

ACQUAINTANCES

THOSE PEOPLE WITH WHOM WE INTERACT ON A REGULAR OR SEMIREGULAR BASIS, WHOSE NAMES AND FACES WE

KNOW, BUT WITH WHOM OUR INTERACTIONS ARE LIMITED. -FUJISHIN

FRIENDSHIP 

DEFINITION 

LIFE STAGES OF FRIENDSHIP

 SAME SEX FRIENDSHIPS

 CROSS-SEX FRIENDSHIPS

 DIVERSE FRIENDSHIPS

WHAT ARE FRIENDSHIPS?

 

A RELATIONSHIP OF CHOICE THAT EXISTS OVER TIME BETWEEN

PEOPLE WHO SHARE A COMMON HISTORY

(ARGYLE, 1991).

A KEY TO THE UNDERSTANDING OFRELATIONSHIPS BASED ON FRIENDSHIP

AND ROMANCE IS THE ROLE OF INTERPERSONAL INTIMACY IN EACH ONE

REVIEW-INTERPERSONAL INTIMACY

DEGREE TO WHICH RELATIONALPARTNERS MUTUALLY ACCEPTAND CONFIRM EACH OTHER’S

SENSE OF SELF

FRIENDSHIP-BASED INTIMACY

 INTIMACY BASED ON

FEELINGS OF WARMTH, UNDERSTANDING, AND

EMOTIONAL CONNECTION.

-BEEBE AND BEEBE

PASSION-BASED INTIMACY

 A TYPE OF INTIMACY

BASED ON ROMANTIC AND SEXUAL FEELINGS

-BEEBE AND BEEBE

FRIENDSHIP QUALITIES: SELF DISCLOSURE OPENESS COMPATIBILITY EGO-REINFORCEMENT RESPECT TRUST EMPATHY

FRIENDSHIP BENEFITS: COPING WITH STRESS CARE FOR PHYSICAL NEEDS CRISIS HELP SHAPE ATTITUDE AND BELIEF COPE WITH UNCERTAINTY MANAGE THE MUNDANE BOLSTER SELF ESTEEM MATERIAL HELP

"A FRIEND MULTIPLIES OUR

JOYS AND DIVIDES OUR SORROWS."

-CICERO

FRIENDSHIPS AT DIFFERENT

STAGES OF LIFE

STAGES OF FRIENDSHIP: CHILDHOOD 5 STAGES FROM MOMENTARY PLAYMATES TO INDEPENDENCE   

STAGES OF FRIENDSHIP: ADOLESCENT RELATIONSHIP FOCUS ON PEERS NOT PARENTS ROMANTIC OPPORTUNITIES SEEK INCREASED INTIMACY CLIQUES DEVELOP NUMBER OF FRIENDS PEAK LATE ADOLESCENCE

STAGES OF FRIENDSHIP YOUNG ADULT AFFECTED BY PATH IN LIFE (COLLEGE, JOB, MARRIAGE, FAMILY) LEARN AND HONE SKILLS NEEDED FOR SUCCESSFUL ROMANTIC RELATIONSHIPS DEVELOP CONFIDANTS WITH WHOM TO DISCUSS ROMANTIC EXPERIENCES

STAGES OF FRIENDSHIP ADULT FROM AGE 30'S THROUGH 60'S FRIENDS FROM YOUNG ADULTHOOD, COWORKERS, NEIGHBORS, RELATIVES, MEMBERS OF ORGANIZATIONS MARRIED COUPLES HAVE LESS FRIENDS OVER THE COURSE OF THEIR LIVES

STAGES OF FRIENDSHIP LATE ADULT LESS LIKELY TO FORM NEW FRIENDSHIPS ESTABLISHED FRIENDSHIPS VALUED MOST FRIENDS MORE IMPORTANT WITH TIME TO SOCIALIZE, RETIRE, ETC.

SAME-SEX FRIENDSHIP

  

HOW DO MEN AND WOMEN APPROACH FRIENDSHIP WITH THE SAME SEX? ONE THEORY-WOMEN DEFINE FEMALE FRIENDSHIPS BY INTIMACY AND MEN DEFINE MALE FRIENDSHIPS BY ACTIVITIES. SAME-SEX FRIENDSHIPS SERVE SIMILAR FUNCTIONS FOR BOTH WOMEN AND MEN THE DIFFERENCE IN FRIENDSHIPS IS MORE ONE OF DEGREE THAN QUALITIES

CROSS-SEX FRIENDSHIPS

CROSS SEX FRIENDSHIPS

 FRIENDSHIPS BETWEEN

PEOPLE OF THE OPPOSITE SEX

"THE ELEPHANT IN THE ROOM" OF A CROSS-SEX

FRIENDSHIP 

THE CHALLENGE OF UNDERLYING SEXUAL

ATTRACTION 

"MEN AND WOMEN CAN'T BE FRIENDS. THE SEX PART

ALWAYS GETS IN THE WAY."

-WHEN HARRY MET SALLY

STUDIES ACTUALLY FIND THAT WHILE SEXUAL

ATTRACTION MAY BE AN ISSUE, IT IS REDUCED WHEN A COMMITMENT

EXISTS TO DEVELOP AND MAINTAIN A RELATIONSHIP

AS FRIENDS.

"FRIENDS WITH BENEFITS"

 RELATIONSHIPS WITH

BOTH SEXUAL AND NONSEXUAL

INTERACTIONS IN WHICH THE PARTIES DEFINE

THE RELATIONSHIP AS PRIMARILY NONSEXUAL.

CAN BE A STEPPING STONE TO  ROMANTIC

RELATIONSHIPS.

IMPORTANCE OF CROSS-SEX FRIENDSHIPS -GAINING INSIGHT INTO HOW OTHERS THINK -MEN REPORT FEELING MORE NURTURANCE AND INTIMACY IN CROSS-SEX RELATIONSHIPS -WOMEN ENJOY MASCULINE INTERACTION STYLE, THE FUN ACTIVITIES AND LEARNING FROM MALE PERSPECTIVE

DIVERSE FRIENDSHIPS

 INTERGENERATIONAL

FRIENDSHIPS 

INTERCULTURAL AND INTERRACIAL FRIENDSHIPS

INTERGENERATIONAL FRIENDSHIPS

 THE OLDER WE BECOME, THE

LESS IMPACT AGE DIFFERENCES HAVE ON US

 THEY REQUIRE SPECIAL

EFFORTS TO MAINTAIN SO THEY ARE MORE LIKELY TO

BE CASUAL

INTERCULTURAL AND INTERRACIAL FRIENDSHIPS

 FRIENDSHIP EXPECTATIONS VARY AMONG CULTURAL AND RACIAL GROUPS FACTORS: -CULTURAL SIMILARITIES

-CULTURAL DIFFERENCES

-PRIOR EXPERIENCES

-TARGETED SOCIALIZING (ESCALATING A RELATIONSHIP WITHIN ONE PARTNER'S CULTURAL NORMS)

FRIENDSHIP DEFINITION LIFE STAGES SAME-SEX FRIENDSHIPS CROSS-SEX FRIENDSHIPS DIVERSE FRIENDSHIPS

ROMANTIC RELATIONSHIPS

ROMANTIC RELATIONSHIPS DEFINITION LOVE AND COMMITMENT PHYSICAL ATTRACTION AND SEX FROM FRIENDSHIPS TO ROMANCE 

ROMANCE DEFINITION

ROMANTIC RELATIONSHIPS 

WHAT COMPRISES A ROMANTIC RELATIONSHIP??

 FORMALLY MARK

MILESTONES? 

SEX? 

MATING AND CREATING A FAMILY?

ROMANCE DEFINED: -LOVE -COMMITMENT -SEX AS EMOTIONAL EXPRESSION -SELF DISCLOSURE -SAME SEX AND CROSS SEX COUPLES  

LOVE

STERNBERG'S TRIANGULAR THEORY

 LOVE IS COMPRISED OF INTIMACY,COMMITMENT,

AND PASSION

COMMITMENT

ANOTHER ASPECT OF LOVE IS THE CONCEPT

OF COMMITMENT

COMMITMENT

PARTNERS ARE EXPECTED TO BE

FAITHFUL, RESPECT US, HELP MAINTAIN

FACE DURING TROUBLE IN THE

RELATIONSHIP, HELP THROUGH HARD TIMES

PHYSICAL AFFECTION AND SEX

PHYSICAL AFFECTION AND SEX

PHYSICAL AFFECTION 

THE USE OF TOUCH TO CONVEY EMOTIONAL

FEELINGS OF LOVE AND CARING FOR

ANOTHER PERSON

PHYSICAL AFFECTION AND SEX

WHAT IS THE ROLE OF SEX IN A ROMANTIC

RELATIONSHIP?

TO PROCREATE? TO EXPRESS THAT A PARTNER IS VALUED? TO RELIEVE STRESS? TO SHOW OR FEEL POWER? PLEASURE? NURTURE OF PARTNER?

PHYSICAL AFFECTION AND SEX

POINT TO TAKE AWAY: 

TALKING TO PARTNER ABOUT SEX HAS BEEN FOUND TO INCREASE

RELATIONAL SATISFACTION AND

INTIMACY

PHYSICAL AFFECTION AND SEX

POINT TO TAKE AWAY: BEING OTHER ORIENTED ABOUT YOUR PARTNER'S

EXPECTATIONS CAN AFFECT RELATIONAL

SATISFACTION

FROM FRIENDSHIP TO ROMANCE

FROM FRIENDSHIP TO ROMANCE

 MOVING FROM FRIENDSHIP TO

ROMANCE INVOLVES ADDING PASSION BASED

INTIMACY TO FRIENDSHIP BASED

INTIMACY

FROM FRIENDSHIP TO ROMANCE

PASSION BASED INTIMACY-INTIMACY BASED ON

ROMANTIC AND SEXUAL FEELINGS

 FRIENDSHIP BASED INTIMACY-WARMTH, UNDERSTANDING,

EMOTIONAL CONNECTION

SO DIFFERENCE IS ONE OF BOTH QUALITY AND DEGREE

FROM FRIENDSHIP TO ROMANCE

"TURNING POINTS" MARKS THE TRANSITION

 LEADING TO DISCUSSION

OF ROLES AND EXPECTATIONS,

CHANGES IN SOCIAL NETWORKS,

ASSESSMENT OF COSTS AND REWARDS, ETC.

FROM FRIENDSHIP TO ROMANCE

"SECRET TEST" BEHAVIOR DESIGNED TO INDIRECTLY DETERMINE A PARTNER'S FEELINGS

IN MOVING FROM FRIENDSHIP TO

ROMANCE, WE BEGIN IN BEHAVIOR KNOWN

AS "DATING".

WHAT IS A DATE?

WHAT DO WE CALL IT WHEN ONE PARTNER

WANTS A MORE INTIMATE, ROMANTIC RELATIONSHIP THAN

THE OTHER PARTNER?

UNREQUITED ROMANTIC INTEREST WHEN ONE PARTNER WANTS A MORE INTIMATE, ROMANTIC RELATIONSHIP THAN THE OTHER PARTNER

ENGAGE IN RELATIONSHIP TALK

RELATIONSHIP TALK 

TALK ABOUT THE NATURE, QUALITY, DIRECTION, OR

DEFINITION OF A RELATIONSHIP

SUMMARY:FRIENDSHIP     -DEFINITION    -LIFE STAGES    -SAME SEX    -CROSS SEX    -DIVERSE  ROMANTIC RELATIONSHIPS     -LOVE AND COMMITMENT    -PHYSICAL AFFECTION AND SEX    -FROM FRIENDSHIP TO ROMANCE