Positive Guidance

and Discipline

Discipline & Guidance facts…

•Discipline: guidance which helps the child learn self-control

•Self-discipline: ability to direct one’s own behavior

•Children may rebel when parents punish rather than discipline

•Attention is a powerful reinforcement when guiding children: they often misbehave

for attention

•Being an example is a very effective way to teach children desired behavior

•Consistency is the key to guiding children’s behavior

•Respond to aggressive behavior in non-aggressive ways

Positive Guidance Techniques

Natural and Logical Consequences

Natural Consequences:

• Occur without interference, child can

see the result of their choices

• Cannot be used if the consequence

will cause harm to self, others or

property, or too far in the future

Logical Consequences:

• Must follow the act

• Cannot be imposed in anger

• Must feel as though it is an

unpleasant behavior

• Short in duration but impactful to the

child

To take away privileges that relate to the misbehavior

• Example: If Jake spills the

toys he must clean up the

mess that is made.

• Example: If Olivia

doesn’t eat her dinner then

she will be hungry.

Positive Statements

• When guiding children, phrase all

requests in a positive manner with positive

words.

•For example: say, “Let’s use soft hands”

rather than, “Stop hitting!”

• Clearly states what is expected, what you

want them to do, then help them get

started

**Turn to page 7 in your packet and complete the

Positive Statements page.

• Avoid saying: No, Don’t, Stop, Can’t

Redirection

• Try to direct their attention to something else

• Give them a toy

• Hide whatever is causing the problem

• Find something else for them to focus on

•Example: If John is angry and misbehaving in

the blocks area, lead him to a different area of the

room and introduce a different activity.

• Children can be easily distracted!

Reverse Attention

• When a child’s behavior is inappropriate,

focus on a child who is displaying the

appropriate behavior and make a positive

comment.

• Ignore the negative, reinforce the positive

• If a child is screaming for a piece of candy, ignore

them. If you give them the candy then you are

reinforcing a negative behavior.

•If a child changes his/her behavior, he/she

should immediately be reinforced with a

positive statement.

Limited Choices

• Do not give the child an unlimited

amount of choices.

•Only give choices that are available.

• For example: “Would you like juice or water for a drink?”

As opposed to: “What would you like to drink?”

• Giving a child a choice will make

them feel like they have some control.

Time Out

•When a child has disobeyed a rule,

they are sent to a predetermined place

to distance themself from the problem

and gain composure.

• Use a place where there are no

distractions or positive reinforcements

• If a child is placed in time out, but they can see

the tv, then the child won’t see it as a punishment

•One minute for each year of age

• You can’t expect a 3-year old to sit quiet

and still for 20 minutes

Reinforcement

• Positive ReinforcementENCOURAGES or SUPPORTS a behavior

“This behavior is good. Keep it up!”

• Negative ReinforcementSTOPS or DISCOURAGES a behavior

“This behavior is not okay.”

• Ways to positively reinforce behavior:• Reward

• Smile, laugh

• Give attention

• Give praise

• Ways to negatively reinforce behavior:• Ignore

• Discipline

• Punish

Your child brings home a report card with straight A’s.• How would you respond to positively reinforce the behavior?

• How would you respond to negatively reinforce the behavior?

Your child is screaming at the store because they want a sucker.• How would you respond to positively reinforce the behavior?

• How would you respond to negatively reinforce the behavior?

When Dealing with

Misbehavior Avoid…

- Physical punishment

- Bribes

- Withholding love- You always love the child, but you just

don’t approve of the behavior

- Forcing promises from the child

- Guilt trips

The GOAL of positive

guidance…..

Help a child gain inner control!

Protect

Encourage