resist and defend
DESCRIPTION
Analysis of familial relationships based on a specific case study, The Trouble with Evan.TRANSCRIPT
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Resist and Defend
From the exterior, any middle-class American family looks typically normal.
Having all components of a nuclear family unit, father, mother, children, is a rare thing
these days thought. Unfortunately in the case of Evan, although he had these structures in
his life to guide him, namely his parents, they had damaging effect on him. Evan’s
parents were abusive to him. Whenever there seemed to be a problem, both parents were
always quick to point a finger directly at Evan accusing him of whatever may be wrong.
Evan’s parents, Mike and Karen, came down on him very hard too. They would sit down
with Evan and berate him for an hour at a time and physically hit him. Evan developed a
conduct disorder that was a direct effect of the type of attachment he had with his parents.
Furthermore, while Evan dealt with his parent’s abuse, he used coping strategies that
were both adaptive and maladaptive. Evan has a poor relationship with both of his
parents and uses coping strategies to combat the harms that are forced on him.
Parent’s are a huge contributor to the eventual personality that their child
displays. When parenting techniques are negative towards their children, Ainsworth
explains that “the individual is handicapped by the lack of what might be called a secure
base from which to work” (Weiten, 429). Ainsworth and Harlow were two very
influential psychologists who determined various patterns of attachments for infants.
Their attachment patterns included, secure, anxious-ambivalent, avoidant, and
disorganized-disoriented. While Ainsworth and Harlow related these patterns to infants,
these attachment schemas can still be discussed as they relate to Evan’s situation.
Evan was shown no love or care from his father at all. One of the most ridiculous
things that Evan’s father stood for was that men aren’t supposed to hug, and should only
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shake hands (The Trouble With Evan, 1994). This is because Evan’s father pushed him
away as an eight year old kid and refused to hug him. Aside from not showing any love
to Evan, Mike would often times yell at Evan and abuse him mentally. Mike loved
referencing the fact that Evan was breaking up the already shaky relationship that Mike
and Evan’s mother, Karen, had (The Trouble With Evan, 1994). Mike would also
displace some of his own frustration on to Evan which in no way strengthened their bond
as father-figure and son. Mike had a rough day and a check he earned landed up in the
wash (The Trouble With Evan, 1994). Mike accused Evan of putting the check in the
wash and yelled at him to no end. This is completely unfair and surely added to the stress
and trauma that Evan was already going through with the rest of his parent’s abuse.
Ultimately, if there is any attachment that is being harbored between these two, it would
fall under the Ainsworth and Harlow categories of avoidant and anxious-ambivalent.
These attachment styles stem from fear and anxiety and a feeling of defensiveness
(Weiten, 428). It is understandable that Evan wouldn’t feel very secure to an adult who
continually abused him.
The relationship between Evan and his mother Karen was filled with even more
confusion and abuse. Karen had been through a lot of psychological pain and had even
tried to commit suicide. Similar to Mike, Karen also seemed to displace this enormous
anxiety and stress that she accrued on to Evan. One of the worst incidents that occurred in
the documentary was when Karen accused Evan about stealing a dime from the penny jar
(The Trouble With Evan, 1994). Evan was scolded, berated, criticized, and abused over
stealing one dime that in actuality was never stolen, but Karen had been so paranoid
about Evan’s stealing that she counted the coins and had done so incorrectly. After a
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night of complete torment, Karen brought Evan downstairs and apologized to him for
miscounting the money and the successive abuse that he had to incur (The Trouble with
Evan, 1994). This must have been extremely confusing for Evan after he had just been
yelled at for a long time. Karen did hug Evan and showed him minimal comfort at best,
but this in no way alters the detrimental attachment that existed between this pair.
Ainsworth and Harlow would again classify this type of attachment as one based on fear,
anxiety, and defensiveness (Weiten, 428).
In trying to deal with his parent’s abusive nature, Evan used coping strategies that
were both adaptive to the situation and at times also maladaptive. Coping strategies take
the form of defense mechanisms which are “largely unconscious reactions that protect a
person from unpleasant emotions such as anxiety and guilt” (Weiten, 475). Two coping
strategies that Evan used that were adaptive are identification and reaction formation.
Identification is a result of “forming an imaginary or real alliance with some person or
group” (Weiten, 475). Evan was apparently involved in a football league during the
course of the documentary and this activity gave him the opportunity to use the coping
strategy of identification (The Trouble With Evan, 1994). On the field, Evan could
probably have dreamed that he was a famous football player and was rid of his abusive
parents. It also gave him an opportunity to exert some of his pent up anger that he must
have obviously had in a constructive way, rather than lashing out at his sister for instance.
The second adaptive coping strategy that Evan used is called reaction formation, which is
“behaving in ways that’s exactly the opposite of one’s true feelings” (Weiten, 475). One
day Evan set up the dinner table and cooked his family a meal which is a tremendously
nice thing to do considering the amount of abuse he was putting up with (The Trouble
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With Evan, 1994). Evan was acting kindly towards his parents while they were showing
utter contempt for him. He must have felt quite differently on the inside, but used this
coping strategy to try and minimize the amount of anxiety and stress that his parents were
causing him.
Unfortunately though, Evan also happened to use some maladaptive coping
strategies that did not bode well for him. Evan used the coping strategy of displacement,
which is when one aims their emotions at another (Weiten, 475). Evan used displacement
at school by sabotaging the teachers coffee by putting paint into it, fighting with the other
kids, and smoking cigarettes (The Trouble With Evan, 1994). These frustrations were
truly aimed at his parents, but Evan displaced his aggravation onto these things.
However, these events would just get Evan into more trouble with his parents, and they
would continue to yell at him. Another maladaptive coping strategy that Evan uses is
called denial of reality. This is when one protects “oneself from unpleasant reality by
refusing to perceive or face it” (Weiten, 523). Throughout the documentary, Evan always
sat quietly while his mother and father found fault within him. This ongoing abuse
deteriorated Evan’s state of mind. Evan was like the personal punching bag for his
parents, and after time, every punching bag incurs a great deal of wear and tear. Evan was
being torn apart, little by little, and although he said nothing in his defense and tried to
block out the pain, it is still there and more potent than ever.
Harlow and Ainsworth would contend that the attachment between Evan and his
parents was minimal and unpleasant eliciting the avoidant or ambivalent-anxious
attachment model. Evan was continually the target of abuse from his parents and he used
coping strategies to try and eliminate the immense anxiety and stress he was enduring.
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Works Cited
Docherty, Neil (producer/director), Canadian Broadcasting Corporation. (1994). The
Trouble with Evan [videocassette]. (Available from Filmakers Library and the
Canadian Broadcasting Corporation).
Schreier, Shelley, personal communication, November 7, 2006
Weiten, W. (2007). Psychology: Themes and Variations. Belmont: Thompson
Wadsworth.