the simple (not easy) recipe of mutual trust for teams

Mutual trust and safety for teams

The simple (not easy) recipe

Antti Kirjavainen @anttiki Scan-Agile 2017

http://flowa.fi/ @FlowaWolf

Antti who?

Widespread experience of mutual trust in teams

And lack thereof: •  Embarrassment, •  Insecurity, •  Losing morale etc.

Say hello to the person next to you

Let’s share experiences

•  Share a story about when you saw lack of trust in a team (or at another work-related context)

•  What effect did that have on the work?

•  Take turns, we have 4 minutes J

Safety and trust are crucial for a team’s

performance

LEADERSHIP IS ABOUT CREATING SAFE SPACES

But HOW?

No safety

Safety

Mutual trust

Answers from Agile

•  Shared purpose, •  Working agreements, •  Communication, •  Listening, •  Engagement, •  Celebrate failure/learning, •  Retrospective prime directive, •  XP (or Scrum) values etc.

Me

You – Interactions

We

Me


We

Shared purpose Working agreements

Celebrate failure

Listening Communication

Engagement

Courage

Me


We

Courage

Safety and trust is built from individual level

through 1-on-1 interactions

BY THE WAY: MOST OF THE STUFF I TALK ABOUT IS INVITATION-BASED

Don’t make people do this stuff because you say so, okay?

ME – INDIVIDUAL

Image by Hans Bernhard CC-BY-SA-2.0

Me


We

Courage

What is courage?

Photo by Eric Kilby CC-BY-SA-2.0

Do I get my courage from this box?

The Arbinger Institute: Anatomy of Peace

Or this?


Courage to be vulnerable

Photo by Elie-Alban Lescout CC-BY-SA-3.0

How to get out of these boxes?

In the box: •  See others as objects •  Others less real •  My needs matter more •  Resist others’ humanity

Mind at War

Outside of the box: •  See others as people •  Others just as real •  Their needs matter as

much •  Respond to others’

humanity

Mind at Peace The Arbinger Institute: Anatomy of Peace

HOW TO GROW YOUR COURAGE TO BE VULNERABLE?

Identity

Intention

Let’s share more stories!

Share your story of growing self-esteem and courage

•  Tell about something that had a positive effect on your self-image or self-esteem

•  You can also relate a story about someone you know (keep confidentiality in mind)

•  How did it help that person to be more vulnerable?

•  Take turns, we have 4 minutes in total J

Reflecting on your influences

Sharing your personal story in a safe environment

Temenos Flow

Lewitz & Neidhardt: Showing Up! http://www.trusttemenos.de/ @TrustTemenos

Mindfulness

•  Has been reported in studies to support high self-esteem

•  Can help dealing with uncertainties, anxieties etc.

•  http://psycnet.apa.org/journals/psp/84/4/822/

Safe experiments of being vulnerable

•  Practice saying NO •  Share a mistake you’ve made with a

colleague •  Ask for help when you don’t fully

understand something

•  See more on Amr Elssamadisy’s blog/vlog: https://samadisy.com/2017/01/22/how-to-create-psychological-safety/

HOW TO HELP GROW OTHERS’ COURAGE TO BE VULNERABLE?

Identity

Intention

Me


We

One-on-one Interactions

Courage to be vulnerable

Me


We

Courage to be

vulnerable


Me


We

Courage to be

vulnerable


Honesty Candidness Feedback

Authenticity

You want authentic? And candid? Okay, I’ll level with all y’all once and for all

Remember these?


Me


We

Courage to be

vulnerable


Awareness Listening Attention Respect


Authenticity

Check-ins: Give space for sharing context, emotions

Photo by Ricardo André Frantz CC-BY-SA 3.0

Check-in protocol

•  ”Hello! I’m {one or more of [GLAD, MAD, SAD, AFRAID]}.

•  [Share details if you want]. •  ”I’m in!” or ”I Pass” •  Others: ”Welcome!”

https://liveingreatness.com/core-protocols/check-in/

Let’s try it out!

Check-in protocol

•  ”Hello! I’m { one or more of

[GLAD, (I have energy)

MAD, (My needs are not met)

SAD, (My thoughts are elsewhere) AFRAID]}. (I’m uncertain)

•  [Share details if you want] •  ”I’m in!” or ”I Pass” •  Other(s): ”Welcome!”

https://liveingreatness.com/core-protocols/check-in/

Share stories on vulnerability http://www.happymelly.com/how-build-trust-in-workplace/ http://www.360stories.one/

RESPECT IS ABOUT TAKING RESPONSIBILITY IN THE TEAM

As well as taking responsibility of your own emotions and actions

Christopher Avery @ChristopherAver Ari Tanninen @aritanninen

ATTENTIVE, RESPECTFUL FEEDBACK Separate your observations, emotions, needs and requests

Empathetic Communication

Observation Emotion Need Request

Non-violent communication @ilmirajat @markotaipale @karhatsu http://flowa.fi/blog/2015/03/18/nvc-speed-dating-kata.html

Now some serious war stories!

Let’s share war stories

•  Share a story about when communication in a team improved

•  What kind of things influenced this improvement?

•  Take turns, we have 4 minutes

Not tolerating harmful behaviour!

SO, TO WRAP IT ALL UP

Me


We

Courage to be

vulnerable


Awareness Listening Attention Respect


Authenticity

You can reach me at…

•  Email: [email protected] •  Twitter: @anttiki •  Website: http://flowa.fi/ •  Management 3.0:

http://flowa.fi/management30/ •  Beyond Agile:

http://flowa.fi/beyondagile/

We are running a survey on safety in teams

•  We want to help the community by collecting data and publishing a report

•  Please take part: http://tiny.cc/safetyfi

Are you interested in having Temenos in Helsinki?

•  We will run the first retreat this summer

•  If you are interested, please email me at [email protected]

the simple (not easy) recipe of mutual trust for teams

Leadership & Management