the us & india: bridging the communication gap
TRANSCRIPT
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Bridging the Communication Gap Between the U.S and India© Bryan Walton
Based on “Speaking of India: Bridging the Communication Gap When Working With Indians” by Craig Storti
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Why are we talking about this? Our company is a successful Indo-American
partnership and we want to build on our past success.
Our company is getting this stuff right Understanding our cultural differences and how
they influence our communication will increase understanding and harmony, and result in better products for our customers and better relationships and working environment for all of us.
This is my first trip to India. I read a number of books on India and its culture and wanted to share what I learned.
I am also here to learn from you and hope you will share your experiences with me.
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We are all ethno-centric Cultural conditioning
We all think the way we behave is normal and natural All of us believe all other ways of behaving are abnormal
and unnatural We are unaware of our own culture and assumptions We filter everything we see and hear through our own
cultural bias Culture is a major influence but not the only one
Personality, education and upbringing, exposure to other cultures through travel or personal and business relationships.
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Perspective This is not about how we see ourselves This is about how others see us This is about the workplace Generalizations are just that: generalizations The average Indian or the average American
doesn’t exist The real Indian or American in front of you is the
real Indian or American – get to know that person and don’t judge him or her by cultural stereotypes.
This is about forging a mutual understanding so that we can enrich each other’s experience and enhance our common success.
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Expectations
We are not judging one culture against another – we are comparing my observations.
There may be disagreement on specifics.
One way is not better or worse, it’s just different.
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Indians compared to AmericansNote that this refers to traditional values and that more and more, especially at Our company, we are more and more alike.
Indians AmericansFor the good of the group Standing on your own two feet,
getting one’s own wayGroup-oriented Individual-orientedExtended family Nuclear familyHierarchical Matrix, egalitarianCommunicate to preserve harmony
Communicate to share information
Saving dignity “In your face”Respect for elders The “me” generationValue harmony Encourage conflict, survival of the
fittest
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Why Indians Communicate Saving dignity
Most of what is done and not done—and especially what is said and not said—comes down to the need to save dignity.
Preserve harmonyThe primary purpose of communication is not to exchange information but rather to preserve harmony and avoid giving offense.
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How Indians Communicate Some Indians may express difficult messages in
two ways: by what you do not say by what you don’t quite say, by implying, hinting, or
suggesting rather than by being explicit. Some Indians may say what other people want
to hear, that they are able to do something that has been asked of you will give positive feedback on a suggestion or idea don’t need any help
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What is not said
It is sufficient for some Indians merely to refrain from saying something positive for another Indian to actually hear something negative.
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Why Americans communicate The overriding goal in Western-style
communication is to exchange information and (often) to get one’s way.
What the other person does or does not want to hear is largely irrelevant to Americans
Americans are free to say what they’re thinking. The goal: to convey what is in the mind of the
speaker—his or her ideas, opinions, knowledge, wishes—to the mind of the listener.
“say what you mean” and “mean what you say” “get to the point”
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It’s all about the individual Americans tend to be individual- and self-oriented.
Americans must learn to how to get along with others and function in groups, but there is a parallel emphasis on the development of the individual.
Many cultures think we are very barbaric to ‘push’ our young people out of the nest completely alone in the world. American culture can seem cold and isolating.
The central function of the family is to prepare its members to be able to live on their own.
Families guide and encourage their members to become independent and self-reliant, to assume responsibility for themselves. Individuals are raised to be able “to stand on their own two feet”
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It’s fun to be free Americans don’t like to depend on other
people. They don’t like to owe them, need them, or be beholden to them.
They want to be free—and freedom means not having to worry about what other people think or what they will say; it means having to answer to no one but ourselves.
They are not taught to neglect family (though the popular culture promotes this) but rather to simultaneously develop their own personal, individual identity and autonomy.
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Not entirely self-absorbed Americans are not completely
oblivious to the feelings of others and are quite capable of being diplomatic and tactful when the occasion calls for it.
But the occasion calls for it far less often in the US than in India.
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Different goals, different means If the goal of Indian-style communication is to
preserve and strengthen personal relationships, the goal of Americans is to exchange information and to have things turn out the way they want.
Indians hear what people don’t say or what they don’t quite say, and read between the lines to sense the message.
For Americans the words are the message, and messages that come in other forms usually don’t get delivered.
While Americans are busy trying to “speak their mind,” Indians are busy trying to read and speak the other person’s mind.
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What is going on here? BRIGITTE: I was wondering, Sumitra, if your
team can come in on Saturday? SUMITRA: Saturday? BRIGITTE: Yes. Just for a couple of hours. SUMITRA: I see. BRIGITTE: Just to finish up that application test. SUMITRA: Right. BRIGITTE: I think Ram’s team is coming in also,
so it should go pretty fast. SUMITRA: Yes. They work quite fast. BRIGITTE: So what do you think, Sumitra? SUMITRA: Let me ask my team and get back to
you. BRIGITTE: No problem.
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Share what you understood What was Brigitte saying? What was Sumitra hearing? What was Sumitra saying? What was Brigitte hearing?
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What is going on here? JOANN: How’s everything going, Kartik? KARTIK: Fine, fine. JOANN: Are we still on schedule? KARTIK: Oh yes. We’re working extra hard on this. JOANN: Great. My people are anxious to see the
new application. KARTIK: I’m sure. When are they expecting to see
it? JOANN: By the end of the week, like we agreed. KARTIK: I see. It turned out to be quite a big job,
didn’t it? JOANN: That’s for sure. Thanks for all your help,
Kartik.
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Share what you understood What was Joann saying? What was Kartik hearing? What was Kartik saying? What was Joann hearing?
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The Indian “Yes” “Yes” is the indispensable word in Indian
culture where preserving harmony and maintaining good interpersonal relations are two of the greatest goods.
“India has had a hierarchical society and hierarchies depend on not giving offense
For Indians the word “yes” by itself is really the equivalent of the Western “Uh huh.” It only means I’m listening, I’m hearing you. It’s not a positive answer but merely a polite response, a routine acknowledgement.
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The American “yes”
For Americans “yes” is a positive answer to a question or inquiry, as in I understand, I agree, I accept, I approve.
When Americans say “yes,” it is usually an answer to a question, and when they hear “yes,” they assume it’s the answer to their question.
There is an expectation that an action will follow “Yes”
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How to tell the difference Since “yes” merely means “uh huh,”
Americans should disregard the “yes” and listen to what an Indian says next.
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The Indian “No”
In group-oriented cultures, telling other people what they don’t want to hear often can’t be done in a direct American way.
Just never say “no” or any other blatantly negative formulation, unless talking to a subordinate.
How to say “no”? The Indian “no” is not a negative statement, but rather the absence of a positive statement where “yes” is clearly desired.
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What is going on here? KUMAR: Marian! How are you? MARIAN: I’m fine, thanks. I was wondering,
Kumar, what you would think if we decided to move up the date for the systems test?
KUMAR: Move it up? MARIAN: Just by a week, at the most. KUMAR: I see. Do you think it’s possible? MARIAN: Should be. But what do you think? KUMAR: Me? I guess you don’t see any problems? MARIAN: Not really. My people can be ready at
this end if your people can be up to speed by then.
KUMAR: I see.
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Share what you understood What was Kumar saying? What was Marian hearing? What was Marian saying? What was Kumar hearing?
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What is going on here?
BILL: We need to schedule our tour of your facility.
ANU: Of course. BILL: How about next Tuesday
morning? ANU: Tuesday? BILL: Yes, would 10:30 be OK? ANU: 10:30? Is it good for you? BILL: Yes, it’s fine.
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Share what you understood What was Anu saying? What was Bill hearing? What was Bill saying? What was Anu hearing?
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Unintended Consequences Communication problems often begin where
you communicate “no”. We do not hear “no,” but you may believe we understand, and we likewise believe we understand.
When Indians and Americans both mistakenly believe communication has been successful, this sets up inaccurate expectations that can result in surprise, and often in disappointment, frustration, and mutual mistrust.
These incidents are in fact legitimate, honest misunderstandings, with neither party at fault.
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The “No-Response” Response One of the most common ways
Indians communicate “no” is not to say anything in response to an inquiry.
A lack of a response may be your response—and it’s not a positive one.
If there’s any way the Indian could respond positively to our suggestion and tell us what we want to hear, you would do so.
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Avoiding the Question or Changing the Subject Another way to get around saying
“no” is to simply dodge or avoid any question that would have to be answered in the negative, which is often accomplished simply by changing the subject.
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What’s going on here? KARL: Ashok, how’s the data analysis going? ASHOK: Not too bad. KARL: Will it be ready for the meeting? ASHOK: The meeting? Right. When is that
scheduled for again? KARL: Friday. Your guys will be ready, right? ASHOK: Actually I wanted to ask you about
the meeting. Who’s going to be there exactly? KARL: Well, my team, Sharon’s team, and
probably Eric’s people. ASHOK: I see. Should be very interesting.
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Share what you understood What was Ashok saying? What was Karl hearing? What was Karl saying? What was Ashok hearing?
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The Postponed Answer A related technique is to put off the answer
to a question or request, using replies such as these: “Let me ask my team.”* “I’ll get back to you on that.”* “Let me look into it.”* “Can I call you later?” “Can we talk about this another time?” “I’ll make some inquiries.” “Let me follow up on that.”
*Also a legitimate response to gather information
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Other Techniques to avoid saying ‘No’ Repeating the Question Turning the Question on the Speaker
“Does that work for you?” “Is that good for you?” “Do you think that’s possible?” “Is that what you would like?” “I’m not sure. What do you think?”
Hesitation
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The Qualified or Conditional ‘Yes’ Indians also express “no” is with a qualified or
conditional “yes.” When given a positive response—sure, fine, yes, OK, listen to what follows. “That should be OK/possible.” “That might be OK/possible.” “That shouldn’t be a problem.” “Perhaps.” “Maybe.” “Possibly.” “Probably.” “Good chance.” “Good possibility.” “I think so.”
For Indians, qualifiers are usually not something between “yes” and “no”: they are much closer to “no.”
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Bad News and Negative Feedback Behind Schedule That’s Not Possible Asking for Help
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Behind Schedule Bringing up the subject of the schedule or deadline Mentioning that the schedule is inconvenient or ambitious. Asking if the deadline is still good for us. Asking if all parts of the work need to be done by the deadline
or if certain parts could be done later. Talking about how busy you have become. Mentioning that part of the project is taking longer than
expected. Mentioning that some parts of the project are on schedule. Asking if members of another team are busy or observing that
they don’t appear to be very busy. Mentioning how late people are working each day or how
much overtime people are putting in. Mentioning that some people are coming in on the weekends. Pointing out how another team was recently given more time
to finish their project.
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That’s not possible Answering with any kind of qualifier:
“That might be possible.” “We can probably do that.” “We’ll try our best.”
Postponing the answer: “Let me ask my team.” “Can I get back to you on that?” “I’ll check my calendar.”
Not answering or responding with a question: “Do you think that’s possible?” “Is that what you’d like?” “Would you like us to be available?”
Making references to how busy you are. Agreeing to the request and then bringing it up
again later in the conversation or in an e-mail.
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Asking for Help Repeatedly mentioning how busy you are. Mentioning that something is taking longer than
expected. Implying that a deadline might be missed (hoping
we will then ask why). Mentioning that something was more complicated
or more involved than you had originally thought. Talking about another team that recently needed
and received help. Talking about a time in the past when you
received help in a very similar situation.
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Negative Feedback
Negative feedback has nothing in common with telling people what they want to hear and for Indians is practically akin to torture.
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What’s happening here? BILL: So what did you guys think of that suggestion I e-
mailed you about last week? SUNIL: Last week? BILL: You know, the idea to . . . .? SUNIL: Oh, yes. I remember. Yes, we got that one. BILL: And? SUNIL: We had some good discussions. BILL: Great. What did you think? SUNIL: Deepok actually had another idea. BILL: Great. I’d like to hear it, but before that, what did
you think of my suggestion? SUNIL: You’d like us to try that, then? BILL: If you think it would work. SUNIL: We liked the one part where you said . . . . BILL: Great.
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Share what you understood What was Sunil saying? What did Bill understand? What was Bill saying? What did Sunil understand?
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Techniques to say ‘No’
No Response The Repeated Question A Very Loud Silence Suggesting an Alternative Asking Our Opinion Damning with Faint Praise
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When Americans Talk Like Indians
Do Indians think Americans mean the same things they do when we accidentally say these things?
YesYou interpret through your own cultural lens and think Americans mean the same things, just as Americans interpret through our own cultural lens and assume Indians mean the same things.
NoIndians who work with Americans for awhile or who live abroad learn not to interpret through your own culture.
Although you can take the boy out of India, you can’t take India out of the boy!
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What to do? Americans can get better at reading Indians Americans can also get better at talking like
Indians – valuing tact, harmony and respect. Indians can get better at talking like
Americans. Ideally let’s meet in the middle, bringing
together the best of both cultures.Western business practices generally prevail in international settings, but there’s room for cultural sensitivity.
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Best Business Practices Two key messages
1. These techniques Indians may use will not be understood the way you think they will2. Indians need to be much more explicit in delivering negative messages. In other words, you have to learn how to be more direct.
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A matter of perceptions
India
USA
Indire
ct
Direct
Indirect
Blunt
Direct Blunt
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Be direct
Be more direct The Indian version of direct comes
across to Americans as indirect and is often misunderstood
Being “direct” means being “blunt” and close to impolite to an Indian but Americans do not take it that way.
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Do Americans really like bad news? No, but if there is bad news, we’d
rather hear it sooner than later. Business concepts: Risk & Risk
Mitigation In advance, try to identify▪ What might go wrong▪ If something goes wrong, how to lessen the
impact Part of risk mitigation is calling out
problems as soon as they are identified so we can deal with them
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How to deliver bad newsDeliver bad news more forcefully
The way you deliver bad news does not make the news sound bad to AmericansYour forceful may seem extreme or exaggerated to you but Americans won’t take it that way.“Withholding comment” will be seen by Americans as “no comment”, meaning “no opinion”
Give bad news as soon as you’re aware of it
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How Americans Think Americans value successful outcomes in the project or
business adventure above group harmony. It’s more important to point out problems early on, than to risk
being impolite or disrespectful. Americans worry much less about dignity than Indians do,
so it is more difficult to embarrass them. “yes” is interpreted as a positive response—not just “I
hear you”—by most Americans. It’s perfectly acceptable, even necessary, to use the word
“no” with Americans. For Americans, the absence of “yes” does not mean “no”
they need to hear the words “no,” “not,” or some other type of negation.
Americans seldom assign any meaning to what is not said.
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How to talk to Americans Americans want you to “speak your mind,” meaning, say
what you actually think, not what you think they want to hear. This should be empowering to Indians.
Qualified or conditional responses—possibly, maybe, I think so—do not mean “no” to Americans; if anything, they are closer to “yes.”
To communicate bad news—we’re behind schedule, something is not possible, we need help—you need to use these words exactly or something very similar.
To communicate negative feedback you must say something negative, not merely refrain from saying anything positive.
When Americans are what you consider impolite and rude, this is almost never what they intend, and they would be embarrassed to know this is how they were coming across to you.
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General Advice Observe what Americans are doing and listen to how we
talk to each other; this is probably the right way to behave in our culture and how we’re expecting you to behave.
Don’t force yourself to adopt American behaviors that make you feel very uncomfortable; find a compromise between what you would do in India and what Americans are expecting.
The way people communicate is not arbitrary or capricious, something they can easily change. Behavior springs from deep within and is the result of layers of cultural conditioning laid down at an early age and reinforced by years of experience.
To change behavior is a slow and gradual process that requires overriding deep-rooted instincts and closely monitoring one’s everyday actions.
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The Language Problem
Cultural differences are real, but there is another problem: Americans don’t understand Indians
Not what you mean, but the actual words
Why not?speed and accent
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Speed
Two language families1. Indo-Aryan in the North2. Dravidian in the south
Tamil, Telugu, Kannada and Malayalam
The world’s fastest languagesTamil is the world’s fastest
languageDravidian speakers tend to speak English as fast as their native tongues.They speak too fast for Americans to understand
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Indian Accents
Northern Indian accents are easier for Americans
Most off-shoring, out-sourcing is in the South
Most Americans don’t group up hearing people speak English as a second language
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Indian English Not British or American English but
it’s own legitimate version of English Unique vocabulary and idioms
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Avoid Indian English slang
Clubbing SnapsFresher Hi techA cover A scaleShe’s eating my brain A mixiBills CanteenPrepone A real time passGood name PurseCurd HomelyLakh
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Caught Off Guard You may be surprised Americans
don’t understand you Why?
You have been speaking to other Indians who speak the way you do
Americans aren’t used to your speed, accent or vocabulary
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Interruptions Indians have a tendency to
interrupt America turn-taking
Indian turn-taking
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Interruptions The overlap is acceptable in India and not
uncommon if it is clear what the other speaker is trying to say
To Americans the Indian overlap is an interruption and is considered rude
Americans may complain that Indians monopolize the conversation but Indians are actually expecting Americans to interrupt them in customary places
Americans generally won’t interrupt because to them it’s rude
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Watch Your Own Speech
Americans also speak with accents and use vocabulary, idioms, and colloquial expressions Indians don’t always understand.
We need to slow down and enunciate Djeetyet? Squeet Wchupto? ‘sup?
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Game: Write down the meaning
It’s up in the air. We’ll just have to wing it. That’s a piece of cake. They’re getting cold feet. We’re out on a limb. That’s a real can of worms. He doesn’t‘ have a prayer. She’s under the weather. They bit off more than they could chew. No sweat. Win-Win/Win-Lose
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Game: write down the meaning
That will never fly. Give me a ballpark figure. It’s a whole new ballgame. We struck out. That was a close call. He’s out in left field. He hit it out of the park. That was a home run. You’ll never get to first base with that idea. They threw us a curve (or curve ball). Grand slam.
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Advice Slow down Don’t assume your accent has disappeared after
a short reduction class Americans may be embarrassed to ask you to
slow down or repeat. Look for signs we may be confused.
Ask Americans to define expressions you don’t understand
Take care in using Indian English vocabulary and expressions
On the phone, slow down even more Don’t interrupt Americans
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Game Answers: American English
Expression MeaningIt's up in the air. It has not been decidedWe’ll just have to wing it.
We don’t have a plan
That’s a piece of cake. That’s very easyThey’re getting cold feet.
They have some concerns; they’re getting or worried
We’re out on a limb. We’re taking a chance/riskThat’s a real can of worms.
That’s a lot of problems; a real mess
He doesn’t‘ have a prayer.
There is no chance/possibility
She’s under the weather.
She’s not feeling well
They bit off more than they could chew.
They are trying to do more than they can handle
No sweat. That’s not a problemWin-Win We both get something good. Win-Lose One of gets something good, the other does not
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Game Answers: American English
Expression MeaningThat will never fly That won’t workGive me a ballpark figure
An estimate, a rough guess
It’s a whole new ballgame
A new set of circumstances, new situation
We struck out We failedThat was a close call We almost made a mistakeHe’s out in left field He’s not aware of what’s going onHe hit it out of the park He did a very good jobThat was a home run That was very successfulYou’ll never get to first base with that idea
That won’t work
They threw us a curve (ball)
They did something we were not expecting
Grand slam That was a complete success
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Resources
Speaking of India: Bridging the Communication Gap When Working With Indians
by Craig StortiCulture Shock: India by Gitanjali KolanadIndia - Culture Smart!: The Essential Guide to Customs & Culture by Becky StephenEnjoying India: The Essential Handbook by J.D. Viharini