today's woman september 2010
DESCRIPTION
When was the last time you took a deep breath? We sometimes need to think about breathing. It sounds basic, but maybe you needed reminding like I did. Stop running around taking shallow breaths. Take several deep breaths as you read this issue. Enjoy.TRANSCRIPT
P o w e r • S t y l e • W e l l n e s s • C o n n e c t i o n s
SEPTEMBER 2010
Way to Go Woman! WinnerS
What Not to…Wear, Do, Eat, Say, Think…
Meet a
Curly Chemistand other great women
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ContentsSeptember 2010 articles
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Stop.By AnitA OldhAm On the CoverBy tiffAny White
I Am Today’s Woman Because…By lucy pritchett Biz View: Ann BennettBy cheryl Stuck 18 ThingsBy AnitA OldhAm Way to Go Woman! WinnersBy kriSten Becht Her View: Reality OverloadBy cAthy ZiOn Don’t Lie and Other Things You Shouldn’t Do When Trying to Get a JobBy kriSten Becht
Advice from Ms. CivilityBy kim crum Catch Sight of the BeautifulBy BArBArA mAcdOnAld What Not to Do About Many ThingsBy Jennifer thOmpSOn What to Do with Your StyleBy tiffAny White And AnitA OldhAm Do’s and Don’ts for DelicatesBy Wendy AnguiAnO
LiVing weLL: Don’t Get OverwhelmedBy BOB mueller MontHLy Muffin: The Need to Know MuffinBy meliSSA dOnAld HeaLtHy woMan: Denise RomneyBy cheryl Stuck HeaLtHy woMan: Katherine DonanBy chery Stuck 10 Health Foods that Aren’t…and 10 Foods that are Healthier than You ThinkBy SAndrA gOrdOn
an arts insider Must-see: The Louisville International Film Festival By giOiA pAttOn 5 Things Not to Miss This Month By cAitlyn hAck, kriSten Becht, And giOiA pAttOn dating diLeMMas: Steer Clear of these Boys By cAitlin gAynOr What to do and What Not to Do When Approaching & Petting a Dog By Bridget k. Smith Top 10 Don’ts for Any Relationship By JOyce OgleSBy Makeover By kriSten Becht
2010 Makeover Galore
(After pAge 32)
Shawn Loving now knows how to get noticed.
page 40
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www.iamtodayswoman.com
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Take a deep breath. Do it
again — fill your lungs all the way up and let your breath out slowly. Ahh.
When was the last time you took a deep breath? I think I went a few years without breathing deep — I was almost holding my breath, holding my shoulders up to my ears trying to get everything done at work and at home.We sometimes need to think about breathing. It sounds basic, but maybe you needed reminding like I did.
So, stop running around taking shallow breaths. Take several deep breaths as you read this issue. Enjoy.
— Anita Oldham
Stop.
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Zion Publications LLC9750 Ormsby Station Road, Suite 307, Louisville, KY 40223Phone: (502) 327-8855 • Fax: (502) 327-8861www.iamtodayswoman.com
Subscriptions are available by sending $18 to the above address for 12 monthly issues.Today’s Woman magazine is published monthly by Zion Publications LLC and distributed free to the people of metropolitan Louisville and Southern Indiana. Circulation 50,000 guaranteed. The opinions expressed herein are exclusively those of the writers and do not necessarily reflect the position of the publisher. Today’s Woman magazine does not endorse or guarantee any advertiser’s product or service.
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Copyright 2010 by Zion Publications LLC with all rights reserved. Reproduction or use of editorial or graphic content in any manner is prohibited without permission from Zion Publications LLC.
PUBLIsHER • Cathy s. [email protected]
adVERtIsInG dIRECtoR • susan [email protected]
saLEs dIRECtoR • Cheryl [email protected]
aCCoUnt ExECUtIVE • teri [email protected]
aCCoUnt ExECUtIVE • Helen [email protected]
sEnIoR adVERtIsInG dEsIGnER • april H. [email protected]
oFFICE manaGER • Julie [email protected]
EdItoR • anita [email protected]
assIstant EdItoR • tiffany [email protected]
ContRIBUtInG EdItoR • Lucy m. Pritchett
sEnIoR PaGE & GRaPHIC dEsIGnER • Kathy [email protected]
PRodUCtIon CooRdInatoR • Kathy [email protected]
maKEUP aRtIst • Holly oyler
wRItER/PHotoGRaPHER • melissa [email protected]
FasHIon styLIst • wendy [email protected]
CIRCULatIon manaGER • w. Earl Zion
Volume 20 • number 9
IntERns • Kristen Becht, Caitlyn Hack
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On Our Cover
We didn’t know Katie Prince had curls like this until we recruited
her for this month’s fashion feature. The 28-year-old says she prefers a
minimalist style, but we wanted to know what Katie would look like if we were to let our image experts make a few simple changes to her hair, makeup, and clothes. The results couldn’t have
been any better: Katie lit up the page — and our cover — in a surprisingly beautiful way. Read more about Katie and see her “before” photo in our What to Do with Your Style feature (pg. 40), plus flip over to page 72 to find out how hairstylist Whitney Davis of Joseph’s Salon & Spa pumped up Katie’s curls. But don’t stop there. Our magazine is jam-packed with what-to-do rules for the workplace, socializing, romance, and everything else in between.
— Tiffany White
Photo by Melissa Donald; Hair by Whitney Davis; Makeup by Rose Thurman (Joseph’s Salon & Spa); Styling by Kenzie Kapp.
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by Lucy m.
Pritchett
Lyndsey Jordan, 22Works for Alltech Fei equestrian Games which will be held at the Kentucky horse Farm September 25-October 10. this is the first time the Games have been held in America.
Graduated in may from Auburn university, Auburn, Alabama with a bachelor’s degree in communications.
NeiGhbOrhOOd: Lexington
I am very multi-faceted. I am a daughter and granddaughter. I work to excel in marketing, riding, family, and my social life.
on PoWer... i have been successful in the horse industry at a young age. i have won two world championships in reining, which is performing a series of maneuvers with my horse with the least amount of resistance. Now i am trying to be successful in business and follow my career.
on sTyle... When competing, i always wear a cowboy hat and leather chaps, black jeans, and a belt with my world championship belt buckle. my boots are black sharkskin from Anderson bean boots. my spurs have my initials engraved on them. i like a bit of bling. my cowboy hat has black rhinestones and my saddle is loaded down with silver.
on Wellness... i work out a lot. in college i worked out four times a week with the football strength-training coaches. Now i work out three times a week and eat a healthy diet to stay fit and trim. core body strength is important for riding.
on connecTIons... i am probably behind the times...i just have a normal cell phone. but, i am a text-message fool. i am hard on phones in the barn so i need something that is bomb-proof. i am pretty well-connected with everybody.
Her PArT In THe GAmes... i will be competing individually in free-style reining on September 30. i am part of a hand-picked group of 15 that were chosen based on background.
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BizViewby cheryL StucK a poWerful Woman at Work
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Ann Bennettage: 59 hairdresser and owner of design images Salon, new albany, and Chairperson for united We Stand fashion Show and Dancing With the Stars hosparus benefit.
family: husband, mike, four children, and eight grandchildren.
Don’t think one person can’t make a Difference. While participating as a model in a small fashion show in 2003, Ann Bennett came up with an idea to host her own fashion show and donate the proceeds to Hosparus.
“They were taking care of my dad at the time, and I thought this would be a good way to give some money back to them. “My sister and I threw the event together in about a month. We did a fashion show in a
restaurant and served a light lunch. Everybody we chose to be models in the fashion show was a cancer survivor themselves, or a member of their family was a cancer survivor.”
That first event drew 85 people and raised $2,000. Ann said everybody encouraged her to do it again.
Although her dad died in November 2003, she decided to do another fundraiser the next year but in a bigger place. The second event, held at Huber’s Orchard & Winery, drew 200 people and raised about $2,500. But this time she had help from her other sisters and a few friends.
Continuing the tradition, the third year brought 350 people and $12,000. She skipped 2006 because she did a fundraiser for her church that year, but in 2007, the committee hired three professional dancers and recruited five local business people and replicated the television show, Dancing With the Stars. Some friends acted out
the parts of the TV judges. Eight hundred people showed up and the event raised $32,000.
The volunteers collected prizes donated by the community and added a live auction along with a silent auction. Word spread and in 2008, 15 models participated in the fashion show, 850 people came to watch, the proceeds jumped to $83,000, and climbed to $89,000 for the 2009 event.
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Join the Partywhat f united We Stand fashion Show and Dancing With the Stars hosparus benefit whEn f September 14 at 7 p.m. whERE f huber’s orchard & Winery tickEts f $50 per person contact f Jamie longacre, 812.945.4596.
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yoU can PRomotE inEXPEnsiVELy. the committee of volunteers distributed posters at local businesses, restaurants, and churches. they sent out sponsorship letters and encouraged the professional dancers and “stars” to recruit their friends to vote for them at $1 a vote.
don’t BE sURPRisEd at thE GEnERosity. One of the most unusual and successful auction items was a dinner for 12 people offered by local couple, Pam and dave martin, at their camp on the river in Leavenworth, ind. two groups got into a bidding war and when the price of the dinner reached $4,100, they combined their efforts and paid $8,200 for dinner for 24 people. Friends helped with the meal and served.
Other items that were donated: jewelry, a grill, a fur coat, and LASiK eye surgery.LEssons LEaRnEd aLonG thE way. don’t spend too much. “in the beginning our food expense was a whole lot more because we paid for a whole meal, so we made the menu simpler.
“in the beginning we all sold tickets but it was too confusing, so now one person takes the money.
“A lot of things are donated. i buy stamps and send out sponsorship letters. hosparus pays for big expenses like the dance floor, the professional dancers, dJs and food.” don’t think yoU can do it aLL “i have a great committee of three sisters, Jean everage, roberta craig, betty roll; a niece, Jamie roll; and three friends, Ginnie Lee, teresa rutherford, and Jan huber. they are so important and do so much to help in our success.”
Ann also attributes the success to hosparus. “everybody is touched by hosparus. it’s been a thrill and an honor to give back to hosparus after what they did for my dad.”
All of the proceeds go to hosparus and the organization takes care of collecting the money from tickets and sponsors.
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and tidbits that caught Today’s Woman’s eye for this month.
by ANitA OLdhAm
It’s a BOY!
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Name: oliver 180 pounds 61/2 feet tallHome: Louisville Zoo
1In this issue, we have recognized five women as our Way to Go Woman! honorees (see page 16). We could have used much more space because each is an interested, involved woman. Here are a couple of addendums: 3 SuzAnne Caraway
asks that you be aware of ovarian cancer symptoms such as bloating, pelvic
pain, and frequent urination that last longer than three weeks. See your gynecologist if you experience these symptoms. Also, come out and support the dee edwards memorial Whisper Walk on September 11,
which benefits Ovarian Awareness of Kentucky’s educational initiatives.
cONtAct: www.ovarianawarenessofky.org or 502.708.1625
Louisville will be hosting The National association of Women mBas (NaWmBa) 2010 Conference on October 1-2, thanks to efforts by our Way to Go Woman Winner,
Heather HowellThe event has been designed to assist women, both students and professionals, as they continue along the journey to develop and enhance their leadership skills. The Conference will be held at the Louisville Marriott with the Career Fair at the Kentucky International Convention Center. The 2010 development sessions consist of five tracks: Powerful Women We all Should Know, Triple Play: Your Career, Your Life, and Your Wellness, Navigating Your Ideal Career, Career opportunities for mBas, and Creating Collaboration among Women in Corporate america. Go to www.mbawomen.org.
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Whitney Davis , who styled the hair, and Rose Thurman , who applied makeup, from Joseph’s Salon & Spa worked their magic on our three models.
Beyond the ShootFor this month’s fashion shoot, the hair and makeup were done by professionals at Joseph’s Salon & Spa.
Many of you missed it! Last month’s Tuesday with Today’s Woman was a tribute to men and food! How can it get much better than that? Well, you can try our next one — with some special emphasis on one of women’s favorite accessories — bags. It is called Purse-onality — find a purse that fits you. And, of course there will be food and wine. It is at Clark Memorial Hospital on September 7. Go to www.iamtodayswoman.com or call 502.327.8855.
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Lora tucker
I am excited to hear that for-mer Army Colonel Lora Tucker has taken over as CEO of Girl Scouts of Kentuckiana. More than 23,000 girls in 64 counties will be looking to her leader-ship. Welcome, Lora!
i hope you saw this issue of Today’s Family. As a mother, i have seen these looks many times before. Our Today’s Family magazine keeps evolving as it ages, and we are giving away great prizes for family trips and fun. you can join us on Facebook to keep track of what is happen-ing: www.facebook/todaysfamilymagazine.
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6 We had two great interns this summer. thanks for your hard work!
7Oil & MusicAmy Gilbert has volunteered to help raise money for the oil disaster in the Gulf. “I didn’t hesitate for a
moment when I heard that Cantor Lipp of my synagogue, Congregation Adath Jeshurun, was again bringing in Dr. Michael White and three other jazz musicians from New Orleans in an effort to raise money for the Gulf. Being a
part of this community, I feel that it is important to give back time, energy, and resources when needs arise, where ever it may
be,” says Amy, who is special events manager at Republic Bank. For more information on the concert, see www.adathjeshurun.com.
— Caitlyn Hack
Our fearless leader, Cathy Zion, is finally back in shoes this month. In the past year,
it seems that one or the other of her feet has been in a protective “boot” more often than she has had two shoes on. I am thinking she
may have to go out and buy a new pair of shoes!
kristen Becht, a graduate of Ball state and now a student at spalding’s mFa program.
caitlyn hack, a student at indiana University southeast.
That’s the amount raised by the Champions 4 Her Walk, Run & Festival held in June. The money goes to 13 different organizations helping women and girls. Find out more at www.champions4her.com.
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Get out the Pink Ties
For an elegant night on September 11 to benefit Susan G. Komen for the Cure, Louisville Affiliate. Tickets: www.komenlouisville.org, 502.584.CURE.
IUS Ogle Center’s Different Drummer Series SeasonOctober 7 ........... the Alison brown Quartet November 12 ..... Kathy matteaJanuary 15 ......... the house JacksFebruary 19 ........ the umbilical brothers present
thWAcK! (adult audiences only)April 15 .............. Franc d’Ambrosio’s broadway COnTACT: 812.941.2525, www.oglecenter.ius.edu
Attention High School Artists! The St. James Court Art Show will award more than $19,000 in college scholarship pledges to talented high school artists. To learn about submitting your portfolio, go to www.stjamescourtartshow.com/scholarship-guidelines-entry-form/ Or contact Chairperson Kimberly Crum at [email protected].
i would really like to hear your opinions and ideas via our Facebook page. become
a friend and also, you can join our Face-book Group to get notices from us about upcoming events. We also have informa-tion about how to win contests that you will only find out on Facebook. Go to www.Facebook.com/todayswoman.
Yum. Kern’s Kitchen, inc. is asking the public to submit creative photos of themselves with their official derby Pie. Go to www.derbypie.com before September 30.
Eat Pie 152010-2011 Louisville Ballet Season:GISELLE: September 10-11 DIRECTOR’S CHOICE: October 22-23 THE BROWn-FORMAn nUTCRACKER: december 4-19 COPPÉLIA: march 4-5 RITE OF SPRInG: April 8-9
If you can knit or crochet… Operation Gratitude has a goal of 60,000
scarves and caps for service men and women.
items should be 5-7 inches across and no more
than 50 inches long with no fringe. Get details
and specific patterns: [email protected]
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Way to Go
WomAn! by KriSteN bechtPhOtOS by JAred AShby
They are problem-solvers who refuse to accept the status
quo. Meet five women whose loyalty, courage,
and commitment to improving the lives of others places them in an amazing class of
their own.
The Way to Go Woman Winners were selected by the editorial board through nominations sent from our readers.
Hope to accomplish over the next 10 years? I would hope that with the efforts O.A.K. makes locally and nationally, we would
either have a cure or a test for ovarian cancer. I would hope that in 10 years my children would still love and respect me. Family is my number one priority. It is a constant balance to make it all happen.
Describe yourself in one word.Committed. When something is really important to me it’s my heart that pulls me
in a direction and allows me to volunteer my time.
Do you have a mantra?‘Live simply, love generously, care deeply, speak kindly, and good karma will find
its way.’
How would you like to be remembered?As someone who was genuinely caring, helped others, was well respected in the
community, and a good mother and wife. I would hope people would view me as a dependable person professionally.
I feel happiest when…I’m hugging my kids. There’s nothing any better
than those little arms around your neck.
People would be surprised to learn that…
I absolutely hate spiders. Good thing I’ve got a house full of boys.
I wish I could…Have a cook and someone to clean my house. If I
could, I would eliminate some stress and the age-old question, ‘What’s for dinner?’
What drives you to succeed?My family. I have a very supportive husband. It’s important that my kids understand
the importance of being a good person and a community person. Ninety-nine percent of the stuff I do is because of my family. I also have a supportive mom and sister.
How do you indulge yourself?Chocolate is a weakness. My biggest weakness is ice cream. It will probably never
go away.
What one person do you admire most?My mom. We’ve lost so many survivors since she was diagnosed with ovarian
cancer ten years ago. There’s a reason she’s still here. I am amazed at her success with this disease. I think a lot of it has to do with her attitude like ‘I don’t have time.’ She reached out for support through O.A.K.
What’s next for you?I’ve got a fourth boy on his way in the next few days. Welcoming him and having
him find his way in this family. >>w w w . i a m t o d a y s w o m a n . c o m 2 0 1 0 S e p t e m b e r 17
SuzAnne Caraway, 38,
works for UPS as an aircraft engineering technical library supervisor. She is married to Bruce Caraway, and is a mother of four boys. She co-chairs the UPS Women’s Leadership Development for Louisville and is president of Ovarian Awareness of Kentucky (O.A.K.).
Way to Go
WomAn! Way to Go
WomAn!
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Hope to accomplish over the next 10 years?
I’ve actually accomplished more than I had planned to at this point, so I’m not sure about the next 10 years. I just want to see where this industry takes me. I’m going to go along for the ride and see where I go. I’m going to get my son out of high school... that will happen in about 10 years.
Describe yourself in one word.Driven.
Do you have a mantra?‘Luck is where preparation meets opportunity.’
How would you like to be remembered?In IT we say we don’t want you to remember us.
If you don’t know I exist, then that’s a good thing. Technically I would not like to be remembered.
I feel happiest when…I’m on the beach in Jamaica.
People would be surprised to learn that…
I am a huge Prince fan.
I wish I could…Teach people about computer networking and
everything entailed in running computer operations. People think it’s rocket science and it’s not. Anyone can learn how to do it.
What drives you to succeed?I like to learn new stuff. I like to play with new
toys (that’s what we call new technology). Just the fact that I can learn something new today drives me.
If your house were on fire, what would you save?
My children.
How do you indulge yourself?Massage. I haven’t had one for a while either.
How did you get into IT work? I needed a summer job when I was 19, so I
applied with the state and I was working with mentally disabled individuals. I got bored one day and asked if they had any computers, and they did so I worked on developing programs to help mentally disabled people communicate better. I did that for nine years, and then I got a job with the Fair Board. I have been here 10 years.
What one person do you admire most?All of my grandparents. They are all still alive.
They have managed some spectacular things and taught me about the world and life.
What’s next for you?Just to open this basketball arena on time and
with everything working.
is director of information technology for the Kentucky State Fair Board. The wife of Romell Dunlap and mother of two has been working with others to prepare the KFC Yum! Center for its grand opening next month.
Alicia Montgomery Dunlap, 40,
Way to Go
WomAn!
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Describe your work.I was hired mainly to grow the company locally.
We import Rooibos, which is a type of bush that can be ground up to make tea, from South Africa. It is organic and naturally caffeine free. We are in Whole Foods Market, Rainbow Blossom, Paul’s, the CVS on Lime Kiln Lane, Doll’s Market, and ValueMarket. You can also find it at www.foodzie.com
About bringing an MBA women’s conference to Louisville?
It is something that I think has been missing. I am from Columbus, Ohio and when I got here I thought, “Where are the women like me?” I had to stop just saying it and do something about it. By the time October rolls around, it will be two years in progress. It will bring about a million dollars to our city and 3,000 people. You don’t have to be a CEO to be a woman in business and to collaborate with other MBAs. It is basically a think tank for women. The last day in September is the launch of the national chapter, and the conference will be held in the days immediately following. More information can be found at www.MBAwomen.org.
Do you have a mantra?I love that saying ‘Carpe Diem.’ I put it on our calendar.
Take advantage of your day. You’re up, healthy, and able to make a change. That’s so cool. If you are passionate about what you do you will get up in the morning with fire in your belly and want to go to work and make things happen.
Describe yourself in one word.Achiever.
Hope to accomplish over the next 10 years? I would love to take a local product and be the
Brown Forman of tea. I would like to create jobs and create something fantastic. Make Louisville known for something healthy and organic. I would like to give back to the community and help women. I would like for the larger corporations to help smaller ones by carrying their products. We have to help each other and not just with money. If this company isn’t successful, then we should look at our community. You have to take care of local companies.
Any regrets?Like every day I think. (Laughs) I doubt myself: Am I
a good mom? Boss? Thinking you’re perfect is when you are in trouble. You should always try to be better. Should I have eaten that candy bar? NO. Should I have eaten those frosted flakes at 9 o’clock last night? Probably not. Overall, I am happy.
What would you change about yourself?I think one of the things I do too often is that I worry
a lot about stuff I can’t control. I would love to be able to carve that out.
I feel happiest when…I am able to help my community, my family, and my
professional and personal colleagues.
How do you indulge yourself?I shop. That’s probably not the best way to say that…
any time that I have off it’s with my husband and my kids.
Way to Go
WomAn!
>>Heather Howell, 37,
is the chief executive officer of Rooibee Red Tea. She is married to Steven Howell and is a mother of two. This member of Greater Louisville Outstanding Women has been instrumental in bringing the first national chapter of the Women’s MBA Association to Louisville in October.
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Hope to accomplish over the next 10 years? Over the next three to four years I will be teaching in the
classroom to gain experience to understand the issues. I want to open my own charter school. I got my MBA a year ago, and I want to help schools practice better business.
Describe yourself in one word.Determined.
Do you have a mantra?Change the world even if it is through only one person
in the entire population. Use every moment you have with people as an opportunity to motivate and inspire them.
Any regrets?No. Everything in life has been a learning experience. Life
is a journey. I try to self-reflect and learn from a situation. Even if it wasn’t a positive experience, I try to take something away from it.
If you could change one thing about yourself?I would calm myself. Take time out for myself. I’m involved
in so many things. If I took more time for myself I would be better for other people.
I feel happiest when…I’m with the kids. Everything I do is for the children. It’s
still okay for them to take a risk and dream. That goes away when you’re an adult.
People would be surprised to learn that…I love the silliest songs like the ones Miley Cyrus sings and
all the Disney songs. I try to persuade my nephew to go see concerts, and he hates it. It’s really about me. It’s not about him.
I wish I could…Live oversees for a little bit. I would like to go to Korea.
They have similar issues with the education system in their inner cities.
What drives you to succeed?Other than the kids, I am afraid of failing. I never want to
let anyone down. I know a lot of people look up to me, and I don’t want to let them down.
If your house were on fire, what would you save?I work for the Red Cross, and they encourage you to grab
your identity. It would help me get everything else I lost in the fire.
Why is it so important to give back? A million people have given back to me. I didn’t get here
by myself. I’ve had so many mentors. I don’t think you should live for yourself, but for other people.
How do you indulge yourself?I love to eat. I eat all the time. I love going out and cooking.
How did you get into Teach For America?My frat brother influenced me. He did it right after he
graduated. Then my mom told me I shouldn’t follow money (because I worked in sales for a year after my undergrad), but follow my passion and I applied after grad school. Kudos to mom. I guess I’ll listen to her now.
What’s next for you?I will continue working in Chicago’s inner city school
system for a year, and then I will be going to St. Louis to teach. After that I will probably transfer back to Kentucky.
Way to Go
WomAn!
Keisha Mabry, 26, >>is a Louisvillian who is teaching reading, writing, and math in Chicago for Teach for America. Teach for America places outstanding recent college graduates in teaching jobs throughout urban and rural public schools with the goal of eliminating educational inequity by enlisting the nation’s most promising future leaders.
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Describe yourself in one word.Advocate.
Do you have a mantra?Together we can make a difference.
Any regrets?My parents divorced when I was four, and I didn’t have a
great deal of contact with my paternal grandparents growing up. Unfortunately, we weren’t able to reconnect when I was an adult, and I missed the opportunity to know them. After they died, my Dad found boxes of photographs and slides in their attic. There is a whole family history locked away in those images. Far too often today, family stories are lost when the storytellers pass away. I try to make sure my children have a connection with their grandparents.
How would you like to be remembered?In a rock opera with songs that have a catchy hook or at
an open mic night. If we don’t have fun along the way, why should we be on the journey?
If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?
I’d manage my time better. 24 hours in a day never seems to be enough. Thank goodness for coffee!
Finish this sentence: I feel happiest when…I hear “I love you” from my kids without having said it
first or in connection to a bribe for a birthday wish list.
How do you indulge yourself?What’s that? Who has time for that? Maybe a special
coffee drink (like mocha with extra whip) or a pedicure, or maybe some uninterrupted time to read a good mystery.
People would be surprised to learn that…I was quite the athlete when I was growing up. I played
tennis, swam, was on an all-star softball team two years in a row, played basketball, and ran cross-country and track. I certainly don’t seem to be athletically inclined as an adult!
What drives you to succeed?Seth, Jonah, Finn (her three children)
Why is it so important to give back? I try to teach my children that our actions are like throwing
a stone into a pond. There is always a ripple effect that occurs which may not reach the shore for a while, but without the initial action there can never be a reaction. Edward Everett Hale said “I am only one, but still I am one; I cannot do everything, but still I can do something; and because I cannot do everything I will not refuse to do the something that I can do.”
How’d you first get involved in PTA?When my oldest son was 4 and started pre-k I offered
to be a room parent and was also asked to help on the PTA board. I’ve probably always been a part of PTA in spirit (if not in practice) because of my parents’ and extended family’s emphasis on, and participation in my education. I have never known a time when we weren’t involved in something connected to school, academics, the arts (both of my parents are visual artists), or our community.
What one person do you admire most?Gertrude Bell (Victorian Era scholar, archaeologist,
mountaineer, and linguist). She defied modern conventions and roles for women during that time and blazed her own trail. She was a leader in the founding of modern Iraq. Her life is detailed in a book by Janet Wallach titled Desert Queen.
Way to Go
WomAn!
Myrdin Thompson, 41,
is married to Joel Thompson and is a mother of three. She volunteers her time as district president for the PTA. She also assists the Clothing Assistance Program which provides new and used clothing to needy children who attend Jefferson County public schools.
What’s next for you?PTA (in whatever capacity I am asked to serve
after my term as district president is over), Mom Congress (a program started by Parenting magazine to connect moms and help advocate positive change for children. One mom from each state is selected to be flown to Washington D.C. each year to participate in a “congress.”) , as well as going through seventh grade again after being away from middle school for over 30 years. Believe me, a lot has changed, yet oddly it remains the same!
t o d a y ’ s w o m a n22 S e p t e m b e r 2 0 1 0
her View by cAthy ziON PubLiSher
Reality Overload
Like we don’t have enough of life’s reality with real news and events without seeing it played out on the screen…poorly in
most instances. I mean, we do have Karen Sypher. How much more reality do we want?
If these shows offered some redeeming social value, it would be different.
But really…The Bachelor and The Bachelorette…and new this season, the Bachelor Pad. What kind of message do these shows send? Superficiality, promiscuous, cattiness…those are certainly not the traits we want our sons and daughters to emulate as they pursue their mate for life.
I don’t know about you, but with the fall television season starting, the introduction of even more reality TV shows is giving me a bad case of ad nauseam.
2 0 1 0 S e p t e m b e r 23w w w . i a m t o d a y s w o m a n . c o m
Reality OverloadSpeaking of new series this season, you gotta love Dating
in the Dark where people get to “know” one another in total darkness so that the relationship is not about looks. There’s no question that reality TV shows were born out of the desire by networks to cut budgets, which must make this the least costly production of the year — they don’t even have to pay for lighting! I guess we’ll have to buy night-vision goggles to watch. Kind of gives a whole new meaning to a blind date, doesn’t it?
Wife Swap is another conundrum. Take the wife in one dysfunctional family and switch her with a wife in another dysfunctional family for two weeks and watch the kids and everyone get totally messed up. Supernanny is another real jewel when it comes to portraying strong family dynamics to an audience which is largely stressed already by actual dilemmas.
And make sure you post “do not try at home” large and loud before the kids — or anyone else — watches Wipeout. Ouch…are those stunts really supposed to be funny?
I will have to admit that there are VERY few reality shows
which seem to have some socially redeeming worth. American
Idol and America’s Got Talent both provide a means for gifted individuals and groups — ok, and some not so talented — to achieve their dream of pursuing their talent. Those shows encourage others as well to follow their hearts and artistic desires, whether they ever make it big or not.
Hopefully, the Biggest Loser encourages the over 63 percent of the population who are overweight or obese, to consider a healthier lifestyle for themselves and their families…to eat better, healthier, and exercise. Since the percentage of obese people is increasing every year, anything that helps is a positive.
I am amazed (and envious) at the competitors’ stamina in the Amazing Race. The problem-solving and determination they exhibit is amazing — yes, I said it again — as they follow clues which take them to some astounding venues around the world.
The reality show I’m really waiting to see launched is the one Fox has tabled for several years — When Women Rule the
World. When do auditions start?
24 S e p t e m b e r 2 0 1 0 t o d a y ’ s w o m a n
The job market is fierce ladies, and we may need a few more tools in
our belt these days to stand out from the rest of the competition and land the job. I asked Human Resource professionals from the area what they would and would not advise job seekers to do during the interview process. Listen up and take heed if you want to nab the position coveted by every other hopeful in the waiting area.
What is your go-to work-force weapon? Your resumé.
Mindy Erxleben, an interview conductor for a temporary employment agency, and Joe Hatfield, a small business advisor for SCORE, agree. A resume that is professional-looking, complete, and truthful can be the key to getting a recruiter’s attention. Winnie Spencer, Human Resources manager at
by KriSteN bechtPhOtOS by meLiSSA dONALd
And Other Things You Shouldn’t Do When Trying to Get a Job
>>
A resume that is professional-looking, complete, and truthful can be the key to getting a recruiter’s attention.
Don’t Lie…
don’t try this at your job interview.
Don’t Lie…
26 S e p t e m b e r 2 0 1 0 t o d a y ’ s w o m a n
Beach Mold & Tool, advises trying to make all of your pertinent information fit on one page. She says, “Something about you has to catch my eye in a few seconds. We recently posted a job listing on CareerBuilder.com and received 200 resumés in one day.” Spencer advises that one sure way to not get hired or even to be fired is to lie on your resumé. She says she can usually tell when someone is lying in the interview, and even if she can’t immediately, later the truth will come out in someone’s performance. Spencer says that if a candidate doesn’t know how to perform a certain task or operate a particular machine they should be honest in the interview and say something like “I do not have experience with that, but I am a fast learner and am sure I could be easily trained.”
What is a definite turn-off when interviewing a potential employee? Erxleben’s deal-breaker is when an interviewee keeps looking at either her phone or the clock. She says having a negative attitude of any kind like “I deserve this position,” “I’m over-qualified,” or “I have somewhere else
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Every day we present ourselves to others. Part of this presentation is our dress. So what does one wear to an interview?
Paula Agee, hr Services manager at integrity hr and casey ernst
demonstrate how an interviewee should be engaged in the conversation.
2 0 1 0 S e p t e m b e r 27w w w . i a m t o d a y s w o m a n . c o m
to be,” are all immediate No’s for her. Erxleben and Hatfield agree that body language is extremely important. If a candidate slouches, shifts excessively in her seat, or doesn’t make eye contact, she won’t get the job.
Every day we present ourselves to others. Part of this presentation is our dress. So what does one wear to an interview? Hatfield advises that candidates dress to match the way they think the interviewer might be dressed. He stresses that it is important not to over- or under-dress. He explains, “If you are applying for a job in a factory, you may not want to wear a suit to your interview. Be sure not to wear anything extreme in any interview. Baggy shorts or chains are never acceptable.” Erxleben and Spencer agree that the interviewee should display well-pressed clothes and clean nails. They both advised wearing nice slacks and a button-down blouse.
When is it appropriate for a job candidate to ask about salary and benefits? All of these professionals agreed that these questions should be saved until an offer of employment has been extended, or perhaps during a second interview if salary and requirements are being discussed. Erxleben advises that if a candidate asks about these things in the first interview, the employer may assume that these topics would always be an issue if the interviewee is hired.
Erxleben and Hatfield agreed that the Number One thing during the interview is that the candidate should be well spoken and not timid. Erxleben said, “You can know who will take initiative, lead, and be dependable. Be outgoing and upbeat.” Hatfield suggests saying an interviewer’s name when responding to their questions. He advises, “People like to hear their own names.”
What can a candidate do to impress you and put herself one step ahead of the competition? Some say receiving a letter — not just an email or a phone call, but a letter — from a candidate makes her remember the person, and even if the applicant does not get the job she applied
for, you might be remembered for a future position. Hatfield and Spencer appreciate when an applicant asks intelligent questions about the company. They said this shows the interviewer you took time to learn about their company.
There it is from the professionals. Dress appropriately, do your homework, be punctual, interested, and most of all, be yourself. You have something to offer. Go out with confidence and land the job!
Dress appropriately, do your homework, be punctual, interested, and most of all, be yourself.
28 S e p t e m b e r 2 0 1 0 t o d a y ’ s w o m a n
StOry byKimberLy crumNew Experiences
illu
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aDVicefrom Ms. Civility
Ms. Civility, an etiquette & advice columnist, made a recent stop in Louisville to talk with our writer, Kimberly Crum. While visiting, she answered several questions from our eager readers.
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Dear Ms. Civility,My boyfriend says I am rude to the people who try helping
me when I fall. I fall a lot. Have been clumsy all my life. I’ve fallen down spiral staircases while attempting to glide in a ladylike fashion. And if there is a hole in the ground, my feet will find it. My problem is not the falling so much as the way people react. When I am sprawled on the pavement, I am totally embarrassed. I want everyone to ignore me. But strangers run to my side, and say, “Are you all right? Are you all right?” Then they try to help me up. I want them to go away and leave me until I can get up by myself. All that attention bothers me more than the bruises and abrasions!
Falling Woman
Dear Falling Woman,Your boyfriend is a wise man. You should be grateful, rather
than dismissive, to the well-meaning passersby. You should respond to their help by making eye contact and saying “Thank you. I think I’ll be fine in a few minutes.”
Your exaggerated embarrassment suggests you are vain. By any chance were you were wearing skinny heels when you “glided” down that spiral staircase? Your vanity and a balance problem are two likely causes of your frequent falls. Ms. Civility’s advice: Wear well-fitting sensible shoes, pay attention to your surroundings, and consult a personal trainer or physical therapist for balance training. A discipline like Yoga or Tai Chi will help with both mindfulness and balance.
Dear Ms. Civility,My daughter frequently embarrasses me. When she was
three, and in a Vacation Bible School performance, she spent the whole show sticking her tongue out at her older sister. When she was in pre-school, she took the battery out of the clock so she wouldn’t have to move to the next learning table in five minutes. One teacher begged me, “Can’t you make her listen? “ Another teacher tried to be helpful and said, “She’ll make a great adult someday.” But that’s another way of saying she’s a bad child, isn’t it? I keep thinking of my dog obedience book: “There are no bad dogs, only bad owners.” I am feeling like a bad mother. Can you help me?
Mother of Misbehaving Daughter
Dear Mother of Misbehaving,First of all, lose the dog analogy. Children are not motivated
only by treats and approval. But the real reasons for your embarrassment, in Ms. Civility’s opinion, is that you identify too closely with your daughter’s behavior. I doubt you stick your tongue out in public; however, Ms. Civility wonders if you are a good listener.
Certainly, your daughter needs socialization. Society does not smile on rambunctious girls. Ms. Civility advises you to consistently educate your daughter about proper behavior, deliver reasonable consequences, and model proper behavior at home. If you do these things, your spunky child will indeed (someday) make a great adult.
Dear Ms. Civility,I’m going to Argentina on vacation. Somebody told me very
few people speak English there. And I don’t remember much high school Spanish. Will the people be offended if I try to speak their language using one of those pocket phrase books?
Latin American Traveler
Dear Traveler,In my travels as a famous etiquette advice columnist, I have
observed Americans compensating for their lack of fluency in the native language by speaking English, loudly and slowly. This makes both the speaker and the listener look silly. The best approach is to first ask “ Habla usted ingles?” If the answer is “NO,” take out your phrase book. Better to read from the book than to speak from memory and say, “Where are her bathroom, please do you say?” Even so, the natives will appreciate your effort, and point you in the proper direction.
Ms. Civility recently encountered a Spanish menu translated into English, which described the low calorie plate as “a meager loin” and the tomato stuffed with tuna as “a padded tomato tuny.” When she realized she was laughing aloud, Ms. Civility tucked her menu away. What offends the natives, more than language glitches, is noisy Americans.
Dear Ms. Civility,The other day, I lost my patience! Actually “flicked the bird”
for the first time in my life! And I’m a middle-aged “lady!” Here’s the scoop. A red SUV was honking and tailing me. As I turned left into a subdivision, my finger went up, involuntarily. Pinkie swear! I was shocked, and so was the driver, because he slammed on his brakes and followed me! I finally escaped by pulling into a driveway, and sat in the car until the red SUV pulled away. Wow! If people overreact like that, maybe I should get a concealed weapon permit. What do you think?
Mrs. Road Rage
Dear Mrs. Rage, Your overuse of exclamation marks tells Ms. Civility you
are easily excited. This brings into question the veracity of your claim, that you have never raised your middle finger. That said, it sounds like you chose the wrong person to “salute.” Perhaps your infrequent acquaintance with the gesture makes it more potent. However, it is more likely you are a poor judge of character. One does not need a PhD to conclude that a bumper-hugging, horn-honking driver might be impulsive or short-tempered.
Ms. Civility advises you to sacrifice your pride for safety’s sake. Pull over to let impatient drivers pass. And, please DO NOT buy a gun. I assure you, the first time you use your licensed handgun will be more memorable than your first time “flicking the bird.” And you’ll be writing to Ms. Civility from the penitentiary.
We sHould Be comPleTely TruTHful And exPlAIn THAT ms. cIvIlITy Is AcTuAlly An AlTer-eGo of KImBerly crum. THe ProBlems for ms. cIvIlITy Are AdAPTed from THe WrITer’s reAl lIfe exPerIences.
t o d a y ’ s w o m a n
Catch Sight Beautiful
f
ofthe
By BarBara
MacDonalD
You’ve probably had an experience like this or might be thinking that’s what souvenirs are for. And they are. But how often are you taking the time to sit back and really focus on a particular memento or photograph? Are you trying to remember the sounds? The smells? The feel of the wind? Close your eyes and see how much you can bring back. Include your friends and family, it’s fascinating to hear different memories of the same experience.
As September begins and we face the end of summer, I’m focusing on ways that I can keep those vacation memories vivid and deep.
The Dolphins’ MessageWhile visiting Cape May with much of our extended family, a group of us took a
dolphin-watching cruise. Within minutes of departure we were surrounded by a group of five to six Atlantic Bottlenose dolphins. They would come to the surface on one side, and then the other, and back again while the boat’s passengers laughed and giggled in delight. I was happily snapping pictures and, in between, glancing over the camera with huge smiles. Dolphins have that effect, don’t they? They appear full of joy as three breach the surface of the water in tandem. The captain says over a loudspeaker that they are performing for us, and they certainly seem to be. As our boat accelerates in search of more dolphins, the ones we are leaving begin surfing in our wake. They leap out of waves and glide in the air before splashing back into the water. I was in the prime spot to catch it on film, and I did. That photograph is now hanging in my office, as a constant
The sun sets into the
Delaware Bay at the end of a beautiful day.
30 S e p t e m b e r 2 0 1 0
It’s 7a.m. on an early summer day as I walk along the sandy beach that leads to the Cape May lighthouse, New Jersey’s southernmost beach city, and America’s first seaside resort. Gulls stand along the shoreline looking for breakfast, as horseshoe crabs try to right themselves in the waves of a heavier tide. My husband and I make our way in silence, enjoying the sounds of our surroundings. My mind wonders how long I can hold on to the feel of the cool, gentle sand, the salty sea air, or the sound of shorebirds above my head. It’s the end of our vacation and when I go to bed tonight I’ll be back in Louisville. I don’t want to forget what this feels like.
Dolphins, as spirit animals, also represent community.
They live in groups up to 100 and are rarely seen
alone. Their color can be light gray or almost black
like these.
2 0 1 0 S e p t e m b e r 31
Catch Sight Beautiful
>>
reminder of that experience. In Native American medicine when the dolphin appears in your life he’s there to remind you to get outside, play, and, most importantly, breathe. That’s a concept I can access every time I look at that image, a reminder to be more like a dolphin.
Diamonds Are ForeverCape May’s location at the northern edge of the Delaware
Bay, makes it the only place where you can find Cape May Diamonds. The diamonds are crystal quartz stones that have broken off from their original home somewhere up the Delaware River and tumbled their way down through sand and dirt that has begun to polish them into rounded shapes as large as an egg or as small as a grain of rice. Crystal Quartz is a clear stone that passes for glass once polished, in fact it’s the exact material
used for the crystal spheres used by some mystics for the last several hundred years. In their natural state they have the texture and clarity of etched glass. Once cut, they resemble diamonds and make lovely jewelry.
If you look carefully you can sometimes find perfectly clear stones and that’s likely
what intrigued the Lenape Indians when they lived in this area as many as 500 years ago. They used the stones as currency with other tribes and gave larger stones as gifts to chiefs and other dignitaries. For the Lenape, the diamonds came to represent the bonding of relationships – whether in business or personal unions. And being a crystal it is said to carry clarity, which explains why it was selected as the material for crystal balls. I carry some of these diamonds in my purse, have others next to my bed, and use some to fill decorative glass bottles I then give to friends. They remind
me of Sunset Beach where I spent hours scanning for as many stones and pebbles as I could.
Showing us how easy it is to have fun, these atlantic Bottlenose
dolphins surf in the wake of our boat.
rough ‘diamonds’ appear as etched glass, with colors ranging from crisp white to muddier shades of pink and taupe.
Hundreds of years ago, lenape Indians gave cape May diamonds as gifts to represent the bonding of relationships. Decorative glass jars display them beautifully.
32 S e p t e m b e r 2 0 1 0 t o d a y ’ s w o m a n
Catch Sight Beautifulofthe
f
The Road More Slowly TraveledOne afternoon while driving back from Atlantic City’s boardwalk where we’d
spent the day, we took the scenic route in search of Lucy. Lucy is a true American Roadside Attraction, and currently lives along the shore in Margate, New Jersey.
Lucy is six stories high, weighs 90 tons, and was ‘born’ in 1881. Even though ‘she’ resembles a male Asian elephant (note the tusks), she was named Lucy in 1900 and the name stuck. At first she was used to sell real estate. People would climb the circular stairs in a back leg and then another set inside her belly to reach her howdah, or passenger area, on top. The howdah is based on traditional design and allowed potential buyers to see their property from above, before touring it on the ground. Lucy has also been used as a cottage, office, and even a tavern until prohibition closed it down.
Her Wikipedia page refers to her as architectural folly, and she forces you to have fun. How many people can say they’ve climbed inside the world’s largest elephant and survived? If you’re planning a road trip, visit www.RoadsideAmerica.com for maps and information about similar places nationwide. Categories include Big Fruit, Smiley Water Towers, White Squirrels, and Big Coffee Pots. An iPhone app is also available.
Real Life awaitsAs my husband and I near the
lighthouse we know we must turn back. It’s time. Real Life awaits us at home. I bring home with me a message from the dolphins to have fun and to play, my diamonds bring clarity and energy from the sea, and Lucy’s view reminds me that beauty is right in front of me every single day. I just have to open my eyes to it.
Until next month, carry a souvenir with you and relive your favorite memories of the warm, carefree summer days.
The World’s largest Elephant is open for tours daily, just south of atlantic city in the town of Margate. lucy was named a national landmark in 1976.
For 129 years, lucy the Elephant has been gazing at the sea.
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“I am a work in progress,” says Janet Hollis, 55, a nurse practitioner at the Floyd Emergency Medical Association. “I lost some weight and began to exercise.”
As a result of the healthy lifestyle changes Janet made, she decided that she wanted to go a step further and do more to improve the way she looked, so she visited Azure Skin and Wellness Center for help. She began with the removal of facial hair. Due to her weight loss and the normal aging process, Janet found that the skin on her face and neck was loose, so Tina Geary, nurse practitioner and owner of Azure, used Botox and filler to treat the volume loss in Janet’s face, to lift her cheeks, soften her jaw line and fine lines, and her wrinkles. Geary also recommended that she experience the triniti™ Skin Series, which is a complete skin program that does color correction, skin tightening, and a skin wrinkle treatment.
Skin is affected by aging and lifestyle factors, such as sun exposure, alcohol and cigarette consumption, diet, exercise and even by facial expressions. Loss of collagen is the key factor in the visible signs of aging, as the skin becomes
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A purified protein, Botox is a simple, nonsurgical procedure that temporarily improves the appearance of moderate to severe frown lines. Patients are asked to contract the facial muscles (frowning, squinting) that affect the area to be treated. This will help determine the best location for the Botox injection. It takes 10 minutes. The Botox is injected directly into the muscle or just below the skin using a tiny needle. There is generally no recovery period. Patients can go directly back to their normal activities. Call now for an appointment and receive a $50 rebate off of your $200 or more treatment of Botox through September 30th.
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“As I invested in my health, I wanted to concentrate on nonsurgical treatments and also learn so that I would be able to teach my patients what they can do for their skin,” Janet says. “The result of my treatments at Azure is that I look younger — I have received many compliments. I have recommended Azure to my friends.”
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makeover your bodyIn three months, Timmie Butler has lost more than 50 pounds. After a
colleague was successful in his weight-loss attempts at the Baptist East/Milestone Wellness Center (Milestone), Timmie knew she wanted to try the same program.
“I have struggled with weight my whole life,” says Timmie, who is the manager of Global Talent Acquisitions at General Electric. “With every child came a few more pounds. I have tried all of the other weight-loss programs out there, with
little success. What makes the Healthy Solutions program different is that the health educators really care about you as a person and your personal challenges in weight loss.”
The Healthy Solutions weekly meetings are an hour and 15 minutes in length and provide educational,
exercise and nutritional information to the members. One of the reasons why Timmie likes the program so much is that she feels this entire approach is more holistic.
“Healthy Solutions is a behavioral program that is a lifestyle change for long-term support,” says Kristin
Brill, Timmie’s personal health educator. “The program focuses not only on weight loss, but on improving health. It is a class program with a health educator.”
Members buy their food and supplements at Milestone and then purchase fruits and vegetables elsewhere. After thirteen weeks you begin to incorporate lean proteins and whole grains in place of the meal replacements with the guidance of your Health Educator. Timmie particularly enjoys the protein shakes that supplement the program food and are available to members.
Timmie, who is 53, exercises seven days a week, arriving at the gym by 5:30 a.m. on weekdays and working out for one hour. On the weekends, she is swimming, walking in a park or riding a bicycle. The end result is a smaller, healthier body, plus, a new wardrobe.
“I am never hungry,” Timmie says with pleasure. “My personal educator said if I am hungry, then I am not eating enough. My husband and children are
very supportive of my efforts. My whole family is eating healthier, too, substituting fruits for cookies. It is never too late to lose weight and be healthy.”
After seeing Timmie’s success with the program and the excess pounds melting away, two coworkers were inspired to join Milestone.
“Earlier this year, my mother had some health problems and quit smoking after 66 years,” she says. “This was a wake-up call for me about my challenges with weight. I wanted to get my excess weight off before I developed health problems.”
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makeover with surgery“It was time to do something,” says Kendra Atkins, a 37-year-old bariatric patient at Clark Memorial
Hospital. She describes her decision as something that just “clicked” as she listened to the team from Clark Memorial one evening at a community seminar. Since having the gastric banding procedure in September 2008, Kendra has lost an amazing 205 pounds through the bariatric weight program at Clark Memorial.
This is not the first time she has lost a large amount of weight, but this time is different. “The support is much different now,” she says, referring to the support group and weekly
consultations with a registered nurse that are included in the program. “The whole team at Clark is awesome. Very caring and they listen…just great support.” It is
this support and accountability, along with listening to her body that she attributes her success.
The weight loss has not only been a physical makeover but a life changing experience for
Kendra. Exercise has become her passion, participating in everything from biking, jogging, swimming to even kick-boxing. “Nothing is holding me back now,” Kendra says. “It is a feeling of endless possibilities.”
Finding exercise that fits her lifestyle and then pushing herself just a little more each time is how Kendra has kept excited about her exercise program. Each time she gets bored with the exercise she changes it up and does something new.
The exercise is not the only thing different in Kendra’s life. She now makes smarter eating choices and is finding that she surrounds herself with positive things.
Kendra shares the advice she has learned from her success with others who are interested in the gastric banding procedure during monthly information seminars at Clark Memorial Hospital. She tells how she is no longer on blood pressure or cholesterol medication, and how she no longer experiences the heart problems that were caused by her excess weight. “I hope I am an inspiration,” she says.
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makeover your jewelry
Cheryl Suhr inherited a beautiful, handmade bracelet from her husband’s aunt. Though she loved it, she wanted to wear it with other bracelets. After searching several places, Cheryl was unable to find anything readymade that looked right with the antique bracelet, plus, her hands and wrists are larger than most women’s, and she could not find bracelets that would slip over her hand.
“I talked with John Moore at Moore Jewelry about this and other jewelry I had,” Cheryl explains. “We had a number of gold chains, bracelets and rings that had belonged to members of my husband’s and my families. They all had sentimental value, but I don’t like to wear a lot of jewelry, just a few very nice pieces. So I worked with John, and he came up with the idea to melt all the gold down into one very nice bracelet and to combine all of the stones onto one bracelet. This way I was able to actually wear something from all of our ancestors.”
Cheryl also had a bracelet with diamonds, rubies and sapphires that was a bar with chains. The stones always ended up on the underside of her arm. John recommended creating an oval-shaped bracelet with a safety catch, which he then designed so the stones were all on one side. Since it was oval, it does not turn on Cheryl’s arm, and the stones are always on top.
“After I had these made, my husband, Paul, asked me what I wanted for Christmas,” Cheryl says. “I told him that I would like to have another thin gold bracelet to wear with the others, just some gold twisted together. Well, that is exactly what Moore Jewelry made for me. They took gold wire, twisted it together and made it the right size to fit over my hands.”
Cheryl had three gold bracelets made by Moore Jewelry, and she chose them because of the beautiful, stylish work that Moore Jewelry always produces. John Moore works with the customers on the concept and design, while Tim Moore carries out that concept and design.
According to John Moore, the best way to control the finished quality of reused old gold is to use it for bracelets like these. There are a variety of decorative finishes that can be applied to the bracelets to give each one a unique, distinctive appearance. From start to finish, they can be made in a couple of days to a couple of weeks, depending on the texturing decorations.
“I am always getting compliments on these bracelets because they are so unusual: they are each one of a kind,” Cheryl says. “With the price of gold today, this is a great way to recycle your old jewelry into something you can enjoy every day.“
BEFORE
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4940 U.S. Highway 42Louisville, KY 40222
(502) 426.8972www.moorejewelry.com
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“My acne scarring has always bothered me,” says Susan Allen, Advertising Director at Today’s Publications. “I’ve tried a variety of skin care products, facials, chemical peels as well as microdermabrasion to rejuvenate my skin. I also began to experience some fine lines and was certain that facial laser resurfacing was the way to repair and rebuild my skin.”
That’s when Susan consulted with Bonnie Keller and Dr. Michael McCall of Aesthetic Alternatives to get the facts about how facial laser resurfacing would work for her and what she could expect from the treatment. Aesthetic Alternatives, a division of Associates in Dermatology, offers the latest in cosmetic treatments and aesthetic products to help patients’ look and feel their best.
They agreed the Sciton ProFractional Therapy would improve the overall appearance of Susan’s skin. The laser works to gently wipe away layers of damaged, photoaged skin. The procedure provides patients with minimal downtime and the skin’s healing process creates new collagen and adds firm ness and resilience to the skin. The laser vaporizes tiny columns of the skin, intentionally leaving islands of normal skin untouched. This reduces the risks of complications associated with traditional CO2 resurfacing. Excellent results can be obtained in just one treatment, though the number of treatments may vary.
“I was expecting healthier, smoother skin with some of the scarring removed,” says Susan who is in her fifties. “Dr. McCall explained that I could expect signifi cant results from just one treatment. The results greatly improved as
the weeks went by and I saw a dramatic difference in my skin texture and tone. After about 8 weeks, I decided on having a second procedure to further enhance my skin.”
Susan experienced no pain or discomfort following each procedure, some redness and a little tightness. She treated with Aquaphor Healing Ointment
a few times a day the week following each procedure.
“Facial laser resurfacing is safe, and the down time is minimal, with three or four days for an aggressive treatment,” explains Dr. McCall. “Patients will get results, but it takes several weeks to see all of the improvement.”
The number of treatments that a patient will need depends upon how aggressively the patient wants to go, but patients must wait six to
eight weeks between treatments. The maximum number of treatments that would benefit a patient is three. For aggressive treatments, patients are given medication to make them drowsy. This procedure works well
to treat deep acne scarring, sun damage, lines, wrinkles, brown spots and skin tightening. For the first week, patients must stay out of the sun and use a cream to keep the face lubricated.
“I began each procedure with confidence in the doctors, nurses and staff at Aesthetic Alternatives. The Sciton treatments have greatly diminished my
acne scars and I feel more comfortable with my appearance,” Susan says. “My face feels and looks wonderful; and my friends have noticed a difference. The
staff is professional and thorough, taking time with their patients and going over every aspect of the procedure very carefully. The results are better than I expected.”
For consultation, call (502) 625.2214 or (502) 897.9065.
makeover your skin
DOwNTOwN • 310 E. Broadway; Ste. 101EAST END • 4121 Dutchmans Lane; Ste. 405
ASSociAteS in DermAtology, Pllc
BeF
or
eA
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www.associatesindermatology.comwww.lookbetternow.net
Page 6 Today’s Woman 2010 maKEoVER GaLoRE
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Today’s Woman 2010 maKEoVER GaLoRE Page 7
2010 makeovergalore
AN ADVERTISING SUPPLEMENT –
After losing 180 pounds, Randy Kelly worked hard to keep the weight off and to stay in shape by running. The problem that he experienced was with varicose veins in his legs, which gave him a sharp burning sensation and stabbing pain after he ran or when he stood for long periods of time.
Randy contacted the Board-certified vascular physicians at Ultimate Vein Care for help after an ultrasound of his bulging leg veins indicated the presence of clots known as superficial phlebitis. Varicose veins form in people who have valves that become incompetent over time. The valves in veins function to keep the blood flowing in the correct direction since veins don’t have any muscles to pump themselves and must be pumped by their surrounding leg muscles. When one valve goes bad, the rest down the line fall like dominoes, and eventually the veins become dilated from back up of blood that causes bulging and aching.
The vascular physicians at Ultimate Vein Care recommended that Randy have a minimally invasive vein procedure known as microphlebectomy. His veins had formed a constellation that did not allow him to have an Endovenous Laser Ablation, which has become the standard of care and always our first therapeutic choice. However, there is a subset of patients who have veins that can’t be treated through laser technology, and competent vascular physicians have developed other minimally invasive techniques such as microphlebectomy to deal with these issues for patients. In the past, people had undergone vein strippings through large incisions with associated scarring and other problems. To avoid this, microphlebectomy technique uses micropunctures to remove the veins from the legs without significant pain or skin injury. Indeed, these punctures close on their own without even so much as a stitch.
“My legs look and feel great” say Randy, who runs eight to ten miles five days a week. “I am thrilled with the results, and the recuperation time is minimal. I no longer have to deal with the burning pain, the cosmetic part was a bonus”.
makeover your legs
BEF
OR
E
4001 Kresge Way #300Louisville, KY 40207
(502) 649.9400www.ultimateveincare.com
Choose a Vascular ExpertBoard-certified vascular physicians:
Matthew T. Jung, M.D.Elizabeth S. Rachel, M.D.
Dean J. Wickel, M.D.Salem M. George, Jr., M.D.Thomas M. Bergamini, M.D.
Bradley G. Thomas, M.D.
AFTER
“For my whole life, I have had crooked teeth,” says Cynthia Frazier, 32. “My front two teeth overlapped, and there were spaces. When I was pregnant, my hormones made my teeth look much worse. I went to a dentist to ask about having my teeth straightened, and he said I was not a candidate for teeth straightening. I was so upset that I went home and cried because I wanted my mouth to be pretty.”
Fortunately, Cynthia did not give up on having a pretty mouth. After searching for help, she located the web site for Perelmuter & Goldberg Orthodontics, www.GreaterSmiles.com, which had the most information on Invisalign, and called for a consultation.
“Cynthia Frazier’s treatment is an example of a case that would have normally required 2½ years of braces and jaw surgery,” explains Dr. Mark Perelmuter. “We were able to get the same results with mini anchor pins and Invisalign in 24 months of active treatment without the removal of permanent teeth or surgery.”
Invisalign treatment moves the teeth just like conventional braces — but with a series of clear, removable plastic trays (aligners) instead of brackets and wires. Doctors Perelmuter & Goldberg are the only orthodontists
in Louisville who are consistently treating teens and adults with Invisalign. The number of patients they’ve treated place them in the top 1% in the world. The doctors and
staff at Perelmuter & Goldberg Orthodontics consider their practice “patient-centered” treating people, not just teeth.
“Each case varies, but within a few months most patients begin noticing improvements,” says Dr. Brad Goldberg. “What makes this treatment so
technologically advanced is that each aligner — which patients will change every week or two — is produced from a computer scan of their teeth, which have been digitally straightened, gradually, to produce the final result. This allows our Invisalign patients to get a preview of how their teeth will straighten, from start to finish. It also allows the orthodontist to make changes in the original set-up we receive from the laboratory in order to ensure that the teeth move most effectively and efficiently. This is where our experience in using the Invisalign appliance is most beneficial, because the Invisalign technicians don’t have the biological training on how teeth actually move.”
The appointments are of shorter duration and scheduled less frequently than braces, which patients really appreciate. Invisalign
patients have significantly less discomfort when compared to braces, no lip irritation, no difficulty cleaning the teeth and no restrictions
on foods that might break conventional braces.
“I used to be so insecure, but now I never stop smiling,” says Cynthia, who is a personal trainer at Fit Life. “I get compliments all the time, and I am so glad that I never gave up on getting a pretty mouth. Doctors Perelmuter and Goldberg changed my life.”
916 Dupont Rd.Louisville, KY
(502) 897.1112
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Page 8 Today’s Woman 2010 maKEoVER GaLoRE – AN ADVERTISING SUPPLEMENT
AN ADVERTISING SECTION2010 makeovergalore
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makeover your figure
BEFORE
AFTER
Dr. Jarrod Little
EAST ENDOld Brownsboro Crossing
Norton Medical Plaza, Suite 200Louisville, KY 40241
DOWNTOWN401 E. Chestnut Street, Suite 790
Louisville, KY 40202
(502) 595.6629www.USAPlasticsurg.com
Fourth year UofL medical student Tabitha Burton exercises regularly and eats healthy. She works hard and strives to follow in her father’s footsteps and become a physician. But for her,
there was always one part of her life that she wanted to change. She always wanted to be more proportioned concerning her breasts. “I am a strong, independent woman,” Burton, 32,
said. “But I have always been insecure about them, and I told myself that I would get them when I finished medical school.” Then, in her third year of medical school, she attended
a lecture by University Surgical Associates’ cosmetic surgeon Dr. Jarrod Little during her surgery rotation. While Dr. Little focused most of his lecture on his work with burn patients and reconstructive surgery, he also discussed his cosmetic surgery practice.
“He was so dynamic,” she recalled. “It was a great lecture. I e-mailed him to say I was interested in breast augmentation, and I received a response that day.” She then met with him for a consult. “He took his time with me, and he really took into consideration what worked best for me and my body, as well as what my future needs might be, such as breast feeding if I ever have kids,” she said. “He has a wonderful personality. There are millions of surgeons out there, and I was lucky to have one with such compassion and skill.”
For Dr. Little, this level of service is the standard of care for his practice. His patients’ needs always come first. He brings a unique perspective to his plastic surgery practice at University Surgical Associates because not only is he a cosmetic surgeon, Dr. Little is also on faculty in the Division of Plastic and Reconstructive Surgery at the University of Louisville. He stays at the forefront of plastic surgery techniques and advances to impart this knowledge upon the next generation of plastic surgeons, as well as his patients. Thus his patients are afforded the latest, most innovative treatments available.
For Burton, this means getting the results she always wanted. She went from a size A to C cup. “I absolutely love them! They look amazing and feel natural,” she said. “I can’t wait to go out now after I take my (fourth year medical school) boards. I feel great.”
In addition to feeling good about how she looks, Burton also feels inspired by the care Dr. Little gave her. “I have always wanted to be a doctor like my dad. My dad is such a compassionate surgeon,” she said. “Dr. Little has that same compassion for his patients. He really does care about his patients. He is so humble and sweet. I truly want to go into medicine because I want to serve people. It is so encouraging to have been treated by someone who holds those same values. I highly recommend him to anyone considering cosmetic surgery.”
Today’s Woman 2010 maKEoVER GaLoRE Page 9
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This piece is produced under the direction of the Advertising Department.
This is the 8th Annual
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ATTENTIONBUSINESS OWNERS!
9750 Ormsby Station Road, Suite 307Louisville, KY 40223
w w w . i a m t o d a y s w o m a n . c o m
2 0 1 0 S e p t e m b e r 33w w w . i a m t o d a y s w o m a n . c o m
Catch Sight Beautiful About Many Things
By JEnnIFEr THoMpSon
What Not To Do
It is hard to know what not to do. This article is like a little advice fairy, sitting on your shoulder,
helping you avoid missteps.
Image consultant Tracy Varga says that “while accessorizing is what people have the most trouble with, accessories are really the personality of your outfit.” Here are three tips to help you stand out:
\ Don’t wear too much or too little. Too much is distracting because others’ attention is drawn to many different places, and too little lacks personality.
Instead: Varga says, “Pick one area of interest like a cool necklace so the eye knows where to focus.”
\ Don’t wear a clashing color near your face.
Instead: “Bring out the natural colors of your skin,” Varga says. “If you have brown eyes and brown hair, wear a scarf that has brown in it.”
\ Don’t leave your accessories wadded and tangled up. This will lead to frustration as you try to put together outfits and make you less likely to remember what tools you already have.
Instead: “Create ‘accessory bundles’ in your closet and jewelry box. Sort by color so you can match the accessories with an outfit easily.”
Visit www.tracyvarga.com or at [email protected].
What Not to accessorize with
Kristina Powell worked as a personal trainer and an aerobics instructor for 10 years. She has worked with people who have exercised successfully for years and people who quit after a week. Here are her tips on what not to do when considering a new exercise routine.
Don’t do too much at first. Powell says, “I’ve seen people who want to do every machine at once, and they hurt themselves the first day and don’t want to go back for weeks.” Instead, start out slowly or you risk burning out or even injuring yourself.
Don’t pick a routine you dislike. “If you’re not a runner, don’t start a running routine,” Powell says. “Do something you enjoy or you won’t stick with it.”
Don’t expect too much too quickly. “Don’t expect big results too quickly or you’ll get disappointed with yourself,” Powell says. “Set small, realistic goals and be patient with yourself. Focus on what you did accomplish that day instead of what you didn’t.”
How Not to Start an Exercise Routine
Patricia Harris is a licensed dietician and owner of Harris Nutrition Therapy. Having worked in dietetics since 1987, she shares these insights into how to start (and stick with) your new diet.
Don’t start during a stressful time in your life. In Harris’s experience, it is especially difficult to begin a new diet around the holidays or vacation time because of the number of people around and the opportunities to eat heavier food. Starting your diet at these times ends up leading to disappointment, according to Harris, because “you’ll likely fail and end up kicking yourself over it.”
Don’t change everything at once. “Consider your schedule, cooking ability, and budget,” Harris says. “Decide how you can tweak what you do now so your changes will become habit.” For example, if you realistically don’t have time to cook the kinds of food you want to eat, you’re setting yourself up for failure. Harris advises making your diet fit your lifestyle, not the other way around, because your lifestyle will ultimately win out.
Don’t try to change yourself—just your habits. Harris says, “You have to want it for yourself, not because of an outside stimulus.” Don’t diet because someone else is doing it or because of someone else’s comments; dieting should be a positive change that you desire for your life, and you should have specific, realistic goals in mind as you start out.
“They have to be changes you can live with,” Harris says. “It took you years to get to the state you are now, so you won’t be able to change overnight. But once you make these changes habits, you can have them for life.”
Harris Nutrition Therapy is at [email protected] or call 502.225.3340.
Start a New DietHow Not to
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34 S e p t e m b e r 2 0 1 0 t o d a y ’ s w o m a n
at times it seems there are more things you shouldn’t say in a relationship than things you should say. author, speaker, and radio host Tanya White shares two of the most dangerous pitfalls.
Don’t compare your relationships to someone else’s relationship. according to White, “Sometimes looking at the grass on the other side keeps us from having healthy, loving relationships.” Focusing constantly on what others are doing not only puts unrealistic pressure on your significant other but also makes you so unsatisfied that you overlook the good qualities of the other person.
White encourages people to “know what kind of relationship you want and the kind of person you’re with” and don’t worry about what others are doing because it has no bearing on your own relationship.
Don’t give ultimatums. “people don’t like being told what to do,” White says. “Ultimatums are one-sided and don’t consider the other person’s needs.”
Instead of giving ultimatums, White says to share your needs by stating your feelings as calmly as possible rather than criticizing the other person’s actions. This allows you to understand one another without being caught up in high emotions.
Find out about White go to www.tanyawhite.com.
What Not to Say to a Significant Other
Former model and current makeup artist Joanne wolf says that “the eyes are the focus point for all who you are talking to,” so getting your eye makeup right is a must.
Don’t go for the latest and greatest looks. Every eye and face structure is different, and every skin tone is different as well, so what looks chic on one woman might look overbearing on another.
InstEad: “Know your eye structure and the best natural color palate that compliments your coloring.”
Don’t use hard, dark liquid lower eyeliner. wolf says, “It can add 10 years instantly to your age and gives a very harsh look.”
InstEad: “apply a shadow color that’s a shade or two lighter than your natural color with a fine-angled brush. Everyone is different and has different needs in wearing and applying makeup.”
Don’t spend a lot of money on your makeup.
InstEad: “Keep it simple or you won’t want to take the time to put it on,” wolf says. “Have on basic eyeliner, shadow, mascara, and brow shadow that you can apply on the go that stays throughout the day.”
Contact Wolf at [email protected] or 502.338.0798.
What Not to Do with Your EYE MakEup
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w w w . i a m t o d a y s w o m a n . c o m 2 0 1 0 S e p t e m b e r 35
Friendships are often a source of solace and happiness in our lives, but when circumstances are uncertain, we often don’t know what to say. Marybeth orton, a licensed art therapist, shares what not to say lest the strain of such circumstances also threaten to strain the relationship.
When hard times comeDon’t say “I know how you feel” unless you actually do.“The majority of people aren’t comfortable with strong emotions,
especially if they’re negative,” orton says. “you can’t change their feelings, so just be a listener, offer support, and ask what they need.”
When conflict arisesDon’t speak out of emotion. orton says, “When you speak in accusations
instead of using ‘I’ statements, you automatically put the other person on the defensive.”
“If you’re good friends, you know how to push each other’s buttons, so you might want to bite your tongue before you start fighting for the last word.”
according to orton, it’s better to walk away for a while rather than speak hurtful things that will drive a deeper wedge in the relationship. conflict resolution rarely happens when high emotions are involved, so refraining to speak is often best for the health of the relationship.
Marybeth Orton practices at Creating Changes Counseling, (www.creating-changes.com), 502.893.4020.
What Not to Say to a Friend
In such a diverse world, you never know who you might meet or the best way to connect with a new acquaintance. Life coach stacey Vicari gives three tips to keep in mind when meeting new people, whether in a business or social setting.
don’t talk without pausing. “Be conscious of your body language and eye contact,” Vicari says. Positive, active body language invites people to open up to you sometimes even more than the words you’re speaking.
don’t assume what you’re talking about interests the other person. “ask people questions that invite them to open up and share.” Find a topic that engages the other person and try to keep your focus outward rather than on yourself.
don’t focus on negative things or talk about people behind their back. “People don’t have a shortage of negative things in their lives,” Vicari says. “we could all use more positive energy in our lives.”
Find out more about Vicari’s services and free workshops at www.myideallife.com or 502.459.8565.
How a ConversationNot to Start
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36 S e p t e m b e r 2 0 1 0 t o d a y ’ s w o m a n
officer carey Klain has witnessed a wide range of injuries and crimes in her years of service with the lMpD, and she has several tips for how to handle life’s more dangerous situations.
If you’re involved in an accident:;
Don’t panic. Stay calm and check yourself for injuries. call the police immediately.
; Don’t leave the cars in the middle of traffic if they can be moved.
; Don’t ignore injuries. If something doesn’t seem right, get it checked out sooner rather than later.
; Don’t leave your car if you witness an accident or a stranded vehicle. roll down the window and ask what you can do to help, and call the proper authorities to come assist.
in an Emergency SituationIf you’re attacked:; Don’t show fear. Be verbally strong and assertive.
; Don’t stay isolated. run to a business or public place as soon as you can get away.
; Don’t ignore the incident. Even if you escape unharmed, always call the police.
; Don’t act like you’re lost or not confident. Walk briskly and with purpose.
If you’re walking or driving alone; Don’t display cash.
; Don’t leave your keys in your car.
; Don’t park in dark areas.
; Don’t take shortcuts in unlit areas.
; Don’t leave your windows open.
Klain’s ultimate advice for any uncertain situation is this: “If you think it’s suspicious, it is suspicious. We’d rather be on our way and you call us back and tell us it’s okay, than for us to arrive too late. If you don’t report a crime, you allow criminals to operate unhindered.”
What Not to Do>>
2 0 1 0 S e p t e m b e r 37w w w . i a m t o d a y s w o m a n . c o m
Kathleen Hudson and Deborah Kramer have been working together as hair stylists for 22 years and have seen the best and worst of hairstyles. When you’re ready for a new hairstyle, they say consider two things:
don’t color your own hair. “People think they can pick out a box in the store and that’s what it’ll look like,” Kramer says. Healthy-looking, long-lasting hair color requires mixing different colors and treating the hair, which is more complicated than the instructions on a box indicate.
In fact, Kramer says it’s often more expensive to fix a cheap home hair dye gone awry than to go to a salon in the first place.
don’t expect a miracle. We flip through magazines and see styles like “the Rachel” and (understandably) want to look just like Jennifer Aniston, but there are some harsh realities to face before we shove the magazine picture under our hair dresser’s nose.
“You have to have the hair for that haircut,” Kramer says. “You have to consider your face structure and your hair’s natural texture and thickness.”
You also have to consider if you’re willing to style it each day. Are you going to have time to dry it and put mousse in it? Do you run your hands through your hair all day?
“It’s not just the haircut,” Hudson says. “It’s the styling and the product that make a hairstyle work.”
Hudson and Kramer’s salon, Attractions, is located at 8028 New La Grange Road, 502.426.1992.
What Not to Do for a New “Do”
Andy Distler, manager of Louisville AAMCO, says that people often fall into two extremes when dealing with their cars, either doing too much or too little. His advice:
don’t “fIx” It yourself. (Hard to resist, though, isn’t it, ladies?) For example, Distler says that people often change their own transmission fluid when something is wrong with their transmission, but this can sometimes be
detrimental if not recommended by an expert. “Doing a quick fix on something often harms your car more in the long run,” he says.
don’t Ignore the problem. Distler says that people often don’t do anything about their cars even if they think something is wrong because they minimize the problem or don’t think it’s worth the money to fix. “Sometimes the price is not something people are willing to pay, but if your car’s shaking or you hear a pop, it’s better to get it checked out by someone who does it for a living.” Louisville AAMCO is located at 126 Breckenridge Lane, 502.420.1947.
What Not to Do to Your
Car
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38 S e p t e m b e r 2 0 1 0 t o d a y ’ s w o m a n
Don’t regift. Ever. Not even once, not even if you move to the other side of the country, not even if you’re the cleverest regifter in the world. “You never know how the person who gave you the gift originally might find out,” Hall says, “and the last thing you want is for someone who gave you a gift to feel badly about giving it to you.”
Don’t think about yourself. Don’t assume because you like something, your friend will too. Consider the other person’s age, gender, needs, and interests. Hall says if you’re not sure, “ask them for a list of 10 things they like, and pick one. That way you know you’re getting them something they want, but they’re still surprised and excited to see what you picked.”
Don’t try to give “aDvice” through the gift.
Hall shares a story: “One Christmas there was a woman who wanted to buy her daughter’s boyfriend a nail kit because she said his nails were hideous. They hadn’t been dating that long and the mother hadn’t said anything to him about it, and I thought, ‘How rude to use a gift to criticize him!’”
(Luckily Hall found another gift — and, for all she knows, the couple may still be together because of it.)
Give For a GiFtWhat not to
Christine Hall has worked in retail for 11 years and has seen Black Friday and Christmas Eve shopping in stores such as Target, Coach, and Bath and Body Works. After helping thousands of people pick out (and return) gifts, she has three things to say:
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2 0 1 0 S e p t e m b e r 39w w w . i a m t o d a y s w o m a n . c o m
sherry Fitchpatrick has over 20 years of experience in banking, accounting, and financial aid. Having spent 16 of those years in management, she has two vital pieces of advice for businesswomen.- don’t curse — not
around managers and not around customers, not even in jest. Fitchpatrick says that “the use of profanity is an open admission that you are not professional and lack vocabulary.”
also, pay attention to your tone. saying “fiddlesticks” with spit flying out of your mouth according to Fitchpatrick “still comes across as a cuss word” and makes you look irrational and not articulate.
“you can be vocal,” she says, “but use imagery and examples to express your point. Profanity just draws attention away from what you’re saying.”- don’t say anything
untrue “even when it hurts,” Fitchpatrick says. “supervisors will never move you up if they don’t trust you.”
Instead of making excuses for mistakes or trying to cover up ignorance, Fitchpatrick says not to be afraid to admit you need time to research a problem, but you should always “offer solutions for any problem you bring out.”
What Not to Say to a buSiNeSS aSSociate
t o d a y ’ s w o m a n
By Tiffany WhiTe and aniTa Oldham PhOTOs By melissa dOnald makeuP By ROse ThuRman haiR By WhiTney davis (JOsePh’s salOn & sPa) See page 72 for information on hair and makeup dos and don’ts
What to do with
When it comes to looking stylish, your clothes, hairstyle, and makeup can be deal breakers that enhance or detract from your beauty. If you want to get noticed — in a good way — you need to know what to do to bring all of these elements together using the right techniques. We asked some local style experts to give these women a few lessons on looking even better.
managing a family and working two jobs leaves very little time for Shawn Loving to give herself the personal attention she needs. “When I wake up in the morning, I am too tired to put on my
clothes so the extra steps that we as women take have been on the back burner.” Shawn, who shops for clothes only twice a year, says finding items that works with her size and shape is a hassle. Jon’a Fogle of Chic Brigade ([email protected]) solved Shawn’s clothing woes by selecting an outfit that complimented her figure. “Shawn has a square body type so I chose a feminine A-line dress for her. This dress creates a waistline and accentuates her small frame,” says Jon’a. The platform pumps, she notes, add inches to her height and highlights her shapely legs.
Shawn is wearing: intrigue dress, $99; Tahari jacket, $58; Trend necklace, $40, all available at macy’s; Cache ring, $28; kate Preston shoes, $149, available at Off Broadway shoe Warehouse.
Shawn Loving, 40, exeCuTive assisTanT, kindRed healThCaRe/ResTauRaTeuR
Your Style
BEFORE AFTER
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Whether she is in the lab working or training for the next marathon, wearing comfortable clothing is
a must. At work, Katie Prince keeps her style simple wearing a basic shirt, dress pants, and tennis shoes, but her typical fall season ensemble of jeans paired with a sweater and boots gets a boost from Kenzie Kapp of Kenzie Kapp, LLC (www.kenziekapp.com). The fun, flirty dress Kenzie selected for her quickly becomes the main attraction. “It was important for Katie to be comfortable and feel good in her clothing. She is very athletic and is always on the move. I wanted her to have the same freedom in this outfit as she does in her running or biking gear,” says Kenzie.
Katie Prince, 28, ChemisT, d.d. WilliamsOn
Katie is wearing: free People dress, $98, available at von maur; B Collection jacket,
$69, available at nordstrom; xhileration boots, $29, available at Target; necklaces,
3@$5.60/ea., available at forever 21.
BEFORE AFTER
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despite losing 40 pounds last year, Susie Gullett says she still feels self conscious about the way clothes fit her body, and
often wears clothes one size larger to cover up what she refers to as “trouble areas.” But Chris Fulkerson, Jana Kos Consultant (502.939.6000), shows Susie she doesn’t need to hide behind loose clothing by creating a figure-flattering outfit appropriate for work. The ruby stripes in her pants, says Chris, draws the eye up and down giving her a taller and thinner look, while the minimal shoulder padding in the jacket balances Susie’s shoulders and hips. To highlight her curves, Chris used a leather belt to cinch in her small waist.
Susie is wearing: pants, $310; blouse, $250; jacket, $495; belt, $225, all from the Jana kos clothing line available at www.vipstudioonline.com or 502.939.6000. linea Pella hobo shoulder bag, $364, available at Blink Boutique, 502.899.9885. earrings $35; bracelet, $39, available at luna Boutique, 502.454.7620.
Susie Gullett, 42, RealTOR
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AFTER
BEFORE
Go for Height “for a petite woman like shawn, the goal is to make her look taller. she should avoid boxy skirts that cover her legs, and opt for a shorter skirt that hits right above or at the knee.”
Beware of Waist Belts “not every petite woman is shaped the same, so be careful of waist belts. if your waistline isn’t smaller than the bust and hips, a waist belt will actually cut the body in half. instead, opt for monochromatic colors that will make your outfit look continuous as well as tailored tops and fuller skirts.”
Pump it Up “Petite women should opt for heels instead
of totally flat shoes. medium height heels work best for most women because they are
flattering and won’t make you look like the leaning Tower of Pisa.”
Jon,a
,s What To Do and
Not To Do Style Guide
Don,t Stay Stuck on Trends
“Trends do not always work for everyone: dress for you and your body type, not for the trend.”
Don,t Match Everything
“shoes don’t have to match the purse and belt.”
Mix it Up “Pair expensive staple items with
inexpensive trendy items and accessories.”
Kenzie,s What To Do and
Not To Do Style Guide
Chris’s What To Do and Not To Do Style Guide
Show Your Small Parts “small parts are the parts of your body that when exposed make you look thinner. Those parts include your ears and neckline, elbow to wrist, and ankles. if wearing a jacket, pushing up the sleeves will expose the wrist and some arm to look taller and thinner. if your sleeves don’t want to stay up, use a rubber band.”
Lighten Up “don’t always wear black. The older you get, the more important it is for you to move away from black and bring more color into the wardrobe. The most important color is what you put next to your face. Black accentuates lines in the face.”
Dress for Your Age “don’t raid your daughter’s closet. i know she wants you to buy the same clothes as she wears — so she can wear them! age appropriate dressing, that’s contemporary and befitting of your state of grace, will send a better message — always.”
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Delicate silks, laces, and satins call for special care and attention.
Beware….pulling these expressions of passion out of the abyss may serve as an aphrodisiac. Flannel, fleece, and cotton, too, are playful, and need special care.
Do’s and Don’ts of Washing
Silks, Satins and Lace: Machine or hand wash silks and satins in cool water. Separate dark colors and wash on a delicate cycle. Use a mild detergent and never bleach. To prevent damage to the garment, wash in a lingerie bag. Steam to remove wrinkles. If you do not have a steamer, turn the garment inside out and iron at a low temperature. Dry cleaning will give your garment optimal results and longer life. Lace garments should be hand washed.
Flannel: Machine wash flannel garments in cool water using a mild detergent. If there is a spot, spray with a color-safe spray and do not rub. Place the garment in a dryer on a low setting and remove while it is damp.
Fleece: Turn your fleece garment inside out and wash in cool water with a mild detergent. Use the lowest heat setting on the dryer to dry.
Cotton & Blends: For best results read the label on the inside of the garment. Cottons are made more durable these days than in the past. As long as you wash them using a mild detergent, hot for whites, warm for light colors, and cold for dark colors you will be fine. Dry at a medium heat and remove immediately to prevent wrinkles.
Do Organize
There are two choices to organize your garments of passion: a dresser drawer with a sachét or hanging on a padded satin hanger. If you choose the dresser drawer, be sure to purchase drawer separators, fold the items neatly and gently lay them in the drawer. Be sure to fold all pieces and lay them together
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Expressions of our passion and love find themselves tossed into the abyss
known as our closets and drawers. These expressions, our nighties, lingerie, and pajamas, long to be
nurtured and loved.
By WEnDy angUIanopHoToS By MElISSa DonalD
Closet Rehab Do’s and Don’ts for Delicates
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in their ensembles. For extra care, line the drawer and separator with a satin cloth to prevent the garments from snagging.
Hanging is the best option for those silk, satin and lace garments. Not only does this keep the garment in your sight and your mind, but it also allows the garment to breathe freely and hang without wrinkles. Chances are the garment will not become snagged from hanging in your closet. Hang all ensemble pieces together on one hanger. Use a padded satin hanger to better display the garment. Hang your nighties together in one area of your closet that is visible and easy to reach.
Hang your silk, satin, or lace lingerie. It helps keep them
from getting snagged.
Check to be sure you know how to clean your delicate garments.
Win a Home Office MakeoverWORTH $1,000
Write us a note about your home office and why it needs a makeover (less than 150 words). Also attach a photo of the home office showing why it needs help. Send entry by October 15 to:
You can also enter by sending to:Home Office MakeoverToday’s Woman magazine9750 Ormsby Station Road, Suite 307Louisville KY 40223Makeover by Closets by Design
SMART StylesSophie’s Fine Yarn Shoppe
Visit, browse, and let us assist you with all your knitting and crocheting needs.
Our shop is conveniently located in the Stonefield Square Shopping Center
next to the Fresh Market.
Open 7 days with a wide selection of yarn and accessories.
10482 Shelbyville Rd.Louisville, KY502.244.4927sophiesfineyarn.com
Classes available.
We’ve Moved!Now formally announcing
we’ve relocated to9948 Linn Station Road
The Plainview Village Center(at Hurstbourne and I-64).
Visit our website to see a full list of designers, or call for your appointment.
New gowns arriving daily.Save $50 off any wedding dress
with this Today’s Woman ad(must present ad at purchase).
9948 Linn Station Road Louisville, KY 40299
502.244.2909www.thebridalsuiteoflouisville.com
The Bridal Suite of LouisvillePresenting the Fall Collectionat these fine shows.September Art Fair at Mellwood on September 12-13from 10 am to 6 pm.
Art in the Highlands at Collegiate Campus on September 18-19.
40 Woodland Way Mitchell, [email protected]
Rita Jackson Sculptor
Some of the local talent include:Cindy Borders, Coquettish Designs, Daisylee, Posh Ponytails, White Tulip, Cherry & Violet, Phyllis Minnery, Silver Dragons and more.
Les Filles BoutiqueArtisan Jewelry • Handbags • Accessories
Inspired by art shows across the country, Les Filles exhibits a wide variety of local as well as national artists specializing in women’s accessories.
lesfillesboutique.comWestport Village1301 Herr Lane
Suite 160502.618.4888
— A D V E R T I S E M E N T —
Two Chicks and Company Jewelry & GiftsFor the games
or any “horsing” around in Kentucky,
visitTwo Chicks
and Companyfor the best selection
in fashion trends, home accents,
jewelry, and gifts.
Visit Two Chicks and Company for that one-of-a-kind shopping experience!
12121 Shelbyville Road Louisville, KY502.254.0400
www.twochicksandcompany.com
Two Chicks and Company welcomes the 2010 World Equestrian Games to Kentucky!
Style Calendar
— A D V E R T I S E M E N T —
September 18 & 19 • 10am-5pmRita Jackson SculptorArt in the Highlands at Collegiate [email protected]
September 10Two Chicks & CompanyTo celebrate the World Equestrian Games: get 10% off all Equestrian purchases.502.254.0400
September 1-30Absolute Skin Care, Salon & Med Spa$25 OFF Highlights or Color502.493.7300
September 1-30The Bridal Suite of Louisvillespecial: $50 off any wedding gown $599-$799; $100 off any gown $800 and over.502.244.2909
September 2, 9, 16, 23 & 30Sassy Fox Upscale ConsignmentSpecial discounts and register to win$20 gift certificate.502.895.3711
September 1-30TotalMed Spa15% off Medically Guided Weight Loss program. Call for appointment.502.895.2120
September 24Smart Styles AdvertisingDeadline to advertise business in November issue. Call today … 502.327.8855
HollyCosmetics.comOffering Skin Care Products, Mineral Makeup, Eyebrow Products and more!Order online or call502.423.1244 or 800.222.3964
Mall St. Matthews by the Women’s Dillard’s
502.895.2733
Downtown in the Aegon Center400 West Market Facing 4th St.
502.566.4554
Stop by one of our stores for one of the new Kentucky Woods Bourbon Barrel Cakes
from Adam Matthews —
it is a unique, moist, and decadently rich dessert.
A Taste of Kentucky
TotalMed SpaNow offering a revolutionary new weight loss program!
Lose 1/2 to 2 lbs a day, lose from your CORE, reset your metabolism and maintain the loss!
TotalMed Spa has a full menu of spa services
including injectables/fillers!We offer Botox® and Dysport®
at the lowest prices in Kentuckiana.
TotalMed SpaTotally for you!4900 Shelbyville Road502.895.2120
Sassy Fox Upscale Consignment
Celebrating our 5th Anniversary with a wine & cheese reception
every Thursday night in September from 4-8 pm.
Receive special discounts and enter to win a $20 gift certificate every week.
150 Chenoweth Lane • St. Matthews
502.895.3711
Hair Removal • Laser 360/Pixel Skin Rejuvenation • Skin Resurfacing
8603 Citadel Way, Suite 105Jeffersontown, KY 40220502.493.7300www.absolute-skin.com
September Special:Receive one area of Facial Waxing FREE
with a Facial.
Absolute Skin Care, Salon & Med SpaOur goal is to help you look and feel your Absolute bestthrough a variety of skin care and massage services.Facials, Massages, Body Treatments
Laser treatments by Dr. Vo
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by bob
Mueller
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Living Well
To keep from becoming overwhelmed, Rosemary makes a list of everything on her plate so she can make a plan. For Tom, it’s
getting up from his desk to run five miles. For Denise, it is to remind herself of her top three priorities in the day. How about you? What has ever worked? Write yourself a reminder and put it on your computer screen or car seat. Then, when you begin to swirl, the way out is right in front of you.
Sometimes I feel overwhelmed because I make the mistake of comparing myself with others. There is probably no other habit that chips away at our self-confidence so effectively as the habit of scanning the people around us to see how we compare. It is as if we have a radar dish on our foreheads, constantly searching to see if someone else is quicker, tanner, or brighter. And when we find that at times someone
is, we are devastated and totally overwhelmed.Thousands of years ago, the Greek philosopher Aristotle suggested that each human is bred with
a unique set of potentials that yearn to be fulfilled as surely as the acorn yearns to become the oak within it. I recently read the life of Sidney Poitier who said that he learned self-reliance from his parents who refused to be defeated when there were obstacles and limitations in the way.
I would like to emphasize that we do not necessarily require a therapist to engage in self-discovery and handle the feeling of being overwhelmed. Here are some simple suggestions that keep me confident instead of being totally overwhelmed.
Don’t Get OverwhelmedIt seems like every day someone at work or in
general conversation tells me that they are totally overwhelmed.
So I began asking myself and others,
“How do you get over overwhelmed?”
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BoB Mueller is vice president of Development, Hosparus, the community hospices of louisville, Southern Indiana and Central Kentucky. His latest book is Create a Better World. Bob can be emailed at [email protected].
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Don’t Get Overwhelmed1) Keep a journal. For many years I have kept a daily
journal of what I am doing, why I am doing it, and what the results are. Just forcing it onto paper makes me ask what is going on in my life. When I look at my emotions and my life on paper, it is easier to see my mistakes and the areas where I am deceiving myself. Remember, though, techniques such as this do not work for everyone, and if, after experimenting with a journal, it does not improve your awareness, simply scrap the idea.
2) Arrange to spend some time alone. We do our children a disservice if, when they complain of being bored, we quickly find an interesting program on television or drop what we are doing to entertain them. As a youth I recall long, hot days mowing lawns. The only solution from boredom was to learn to daydream, and that is where I first learned the power of spinning out detailed visions of what I wanted to be and have and do.
3) Regularly redefine yourself. As long as we live, we will be in a state of flux. The Tartar tribes of Central Asia had a curse they hurled against their enemies: “May you stay in one place forever.” It is indeed a curse to remain the
way we are forever. Life is not so much a matter of “finding” ourselves as it is a process of making ourselves.
4) Look for someone in whom you can confide. One of the values of a confidant is that he or she helps us avoid self-delusion, for as humans we have an infinite capacity for self-deception. Having one other person who knows everything about us is enormously helpful in being able to see ourselves realistically. Telling someone everything can help us learn a great deal about ourselves.
I have enjoyed film clips of Julia Child. When things went wrong on her cooking show (and they often did) she took it in stride. She didn’t fall apart and become totally overwhelmed by the disaster. Pulling out a fallen soufflé in front of millions of viewers, this master chef exclaimed, “You can’t win them all!” Where do you need to say this in your life?
When confronted with a problem that seems to overwhelm you (family difficulties, inner turmoil, job challenges) that is taking all your mental energy, ask yourself, “If I didn’t have this problem, what would I be doing?” Then do that. That way you don’t spend all of your time on the problem, but get on with the rest of your life.
story & photos by
Melissa donald
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RECIPE >>>
I just recently started working as a personal chef for a friend who decided to take control of her well being by
incorporating a strict, healthy diet. And by strict, I mean cutting out many of the cooking and baking necessities that the majority of us stock in our cupboards and refrigerators — such items as oil, milk, butter, and eggs, which many of us come to rely on in the kitchen — especially when it comes to baking. My challenge…to completely omit all these items from the menu, and still supply my friend with several flavorful, delicious, and healthy meals that would last for at least five days during a week.
Well, I was up to the challenge. I know when it comes to baked goods, there are many substitutions for all the items listed above, and there are a slew of vegan recipes floating around the internet. But creating the right combination with these stand-in ingredients, in which to create a successful baked good, was tricky. I definitely created a few recipes that did not turn out so well, but there were a couple that worked beautifully. The recipe below includes a few substitutions, but not all (I didn’t want to hit you all at once with these). If you care to know about what to substitute for an egg in a baked good, here is a combination that worked well for me in another recipe. I did not use it in this recipe, but it wouldn’t hurt to give this a try. Here are some other substitutions that I have used when experimenting with different muffins.
Egg substitute in baked goods: 1/4 c soy milk and 1 Tbsp fresh lemon juice. Milk substitute: I have used plain almond milk and soy milk in place of cow’s milk.Oil substitute: I like to use unsweetened apple sauce.I have also reduced the sugar amounts by adding honey to a recipe. In this recipe, you will find applesauce and almond milk as substitutes for oil and
cow’s milk. This is a very moist and slightly dense muffin, loaded with fiber and protein. I like to sprinkle a little turbinado sugar on top of each muffin before baking to add more texture. These are best served warm, and then stored in an airtight container in the refrigerator for up to 3 days. Slightly reheat these after pulling from the refrigerator.
The Need to Know MuffinWith ApplesAuce And Almond milk
Monthly Muffin
nutritional information:Calories: 200total Fat: 9 g (with less than
1 gram of saturated fat)Cholesterol: 17 mgtotal Carbohydrates: 26Fiber: 5 gsugar: 12 g (including natural sugars
from the apple and applesauce)protein: 5 g
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11/4 c unbleached white flour1/2 c flaxseed meal1/2 c buckwheat flour11/2 tsp baking powder1/2 tsp baking soda1/2 tsp salt11/2 tsp ground cinnamon1/4 tsp nutmeg 1/8 tsp cloves1/3 c turbinado sugar + 2 tbsps for topping (optional)1 egg at room temperature and slightly beaten1 tsp vanilla11/4 c plain almond milk1 tbsp honey1/3 c unsweetened applesauce1 large apple (about 1-2 cups) chopped — i used a gala1 c toasted pecans — chopped
prep a 21-cup muffin tin with either baking spray or Crisco shortening.
in a medium-size frying pan, toast the pecans on medium-high heat for about 3 minutes, stirring occasionally. remove from the pan to stop the toasting process and transfer onto cutting board. Wait for the pecans to cool and then chop into small pieces.
While the pecans are toasting, chop a large apple into small pieces and set aside. i like to use a sweeter apple, such as gala and pink lady.
in a large bowl, combine the white flour, flaxseed meal, buckwheat flour, baking powder, baking soda, salt, cinnamon, nutmeg, cloves, and 1/3 cup of turbinado sugar. Whisk together well, incorporating all ingredients.
in a medium bowl, slightly beat an egg in with the vanilla, almond milk, honey, and applesauce.
Make a well in the dry ingredients and add the wet ingredients. stir until the dry ingredients are almost coated and then add the apples and pecans. stir until everything is just coated. Fill each muffin cup to the rim and sprinkle with the 2
tbsps of turbinado sugar.
bake at 425 degrees for 12-14 minutes.
remove from the oven and let sit for about a minute in the pan and then transfer to a wire rack to cool slightly. serve warm.
of course if you have cow’s milk and would prefer to use this instead of almond or soy milk, you may do so using the same amount.
the need to knoW muffin
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by Cheryl stuCk
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HealthyWomandenise romneyaGe: 33 owner of Dedicated to You! nutrition educational Services
and certified Dr. Sears l.e.a.n. coach
Denise Romney teaches families how to improve their health through simple lifestyle changes using the Dr. Sears
L.E.A.N. program, an acronym for Lifestyle, Exercise, Attitude, and Nutrition (www.drsearslean.com). She generally focuses on the positive and how to do it right, but for this issue, we asked her to tell us what and what not to do when it comes to our bodies.
Lifestyle
• “Don’t drink alcohol at all! You can get your resveratrol (antioxidant found in red wine]) from Concord grape juice, dark berries or real food, so instead of depending on wine, get it from the actual fruit.”
• “Don’t smoke.” • “Don’t over-schedule yourself. Take time out for yourself to
get rid of stress.”
Lifestyle do’s & don’ts
• “Don’t expect to do everything yourself. Get a good support system to help you. Stay in touch with friends. I attend church for support. But there are other organizations, like MOPS International (Mothers of preschoolers) that meet about once a month. (www.mops.org)
• “Don’t try to get by on five or six hours of sleep. Studies show that people who sleep at least eight hours per night improve their immune systems.”
Exercise
• “If you don’t have an exercise that you enjoy, you aren’t going to do it.
• “Don’t leave out the kids. Incorporate it so everyone can do it together.”
Attitude • “Don’t think, ‘I have to,’ think ‘I get to.’ Instead of I have to
work out, I get to work out. Instead of ‘I have to eat healthy.’ think ‘I get to eat healthy.’ I get to fuel my body with optimal nutrition.
• “If you say, I love exercise, everyday, eventually you’re going to believe that. Put in your mind what you actually want to happen.”
Nutrition • “Don’t ignore food labels. People tend to rely on the
information in the big box. You need to read the fine print. I teach people what words to look for. I call them bad words.” Some examples: high fructose corn syrup, hydrogenated oils, or food dyes, FD&C red dye #40. “We give out a list called the Dirty Dozen in class. Avoiding the dirty dozen eliminates about 70 percent of the junk food.”
• “Stay out of the center of the store. Shop the perimeter because that’s where you find the grow foods. If foods grow from the ground, they’ll help you grow.”
• “Don’t eat too many simple carbohydrates or too much fat. We need to be eating more vegetables, fruits, and grains.”
• “Don’t cook your vegetables, eat them raw. Because cooking kills the enzymes, food loses nutrient value.”
Denise offers many types of classes: private, corporate, offices, home, and schools. The cost ranges from free (for a one-hour class sponsored by Juice Plus, which is a company that offers whole food supplements), to $1000 (which would normally be a six-week series with a corporation).
You can find her at www.BeBetterWithFood.com, 502.648.8267.
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by Cheryl stuCk Healthy Woman
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Katherine donan
aGe: 36 anusara-inspired yoga teacher at Infinite Bliss Yoga on Bardstown
rd. and Betsy’s Hot Yoga on Shelbyville rd.
do’s & don’tsof Yoga
Katherine Donan practices Hatha yoga up to six hours per week in
addition to teaching Anusara-inspired yoga at two local studios. She also runs and rock climbs several times a week.
Katherine’s desire as a yoga instructor is to make sure her students have a safe place to have a fun and playful experience while paying particular attention to alignment to prevent injury. Finding your niche
• “Don’t limit yourself. Hatha yoga is the big umbrella and under that are different styles like Anusara, Bikram, Iyengar, Ashtanga…so if you don’t like one style, don’t think that’s the only way to go.
• “Teachers are different, even within a particular style, so if you don’t resonate with one, try another.
• “Don’t study with just anybody. Do some research and find somebody that’s certified and has a lot of training, because it does matter. I’ve been training since 1999.”
Make it work for you
• “You don’t always have to spend an hour and a half in class. You can come in after a run and do 10 minutes of yoga. After you have the basics, you can do it at home or in the park after a run, after golfing or any other athletic activity to stretch out so you don’t hold any tightness from that activity.
• “You don’t have to buy anything before you come to your first class. You can usually rent or borrow a mat, but if you’re going regularly it’s nice to have your own. The studios have the props, blocks, and blankets.
• “Don’t come in jeans. Wear comfortable, stretchy clothes. They can be loose, but you don’t want to have a shirt that’s so loose that when you bow forward or when you’re doing downward-facing-dog pose it flies up and you have to fidget with it.
• “Don’t think you have to be in perfect shape to come to yoga. You can be really tight. When I first started yoga, my hands went barely below my knees when I bent over — that’s how tight I was. Work wherever you are and be compassionate with yourself. Don’t think you have to be a Gumby.
• “Don’t forget to breathe — just relax. • “Don’t be nervous. Know that you’ll be welcomed at a yoga
studio.”Common mistakes in alignment
• “The hands and the feet are the foundation of yoga poses. For example, if you’re doing a downward-facing-dog pose and the hands are misaligned, you may have pain in your shoulder.
• “Basically when you’re practicing, you want to have the four corners of the palms rooted to the ground and fingers evenly stretched out so the weight is not hanging in the wrist.
• “Some people shift their weight to the outsides of the feet or collapse their arches to the inside. If the feet aren’t planted properly, you can lose balance or feel unsteady in your pose.”
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Just when you think you’ve got it all figured out, a new report trumpeting the benefits of yet another good-for-you food. Sure, some of them are winners. But many are not: They’re simply victims of too much health hype. Here are 10 supposed superfoods whose powers you may be overestimating — and 10 that aren’t getting the credit they deserve.
Don’t Eat Too Much of These…Canned Soups Many are virtually salt water. Even if your high blood pressure (linked with salt) isn’t a worry for you, it’s still good to limit your intake. The healthiest soups have about 480 milligrams (mg) of sodium and five or fewer fat grams per serving.
100-calorie snack packs Research shows that buying snacks in single-serving 100-calorie packs can help you eat less. “They’re effective for portion control for about 70 to 80 percent of the population,” says Brian Wansink, Ph.D., director of the Cornell Food & Brand Lab at Cornell University in Ithaca, N.Y. and author of Mindless Eating. But what if you’re among the 20 to 30 percent who may actually eat more by buying these products? “Because 100-calorie packs are small and convenient, they might actually lead you to eat them more frequently than you otherwise would,” Wansink says. “They do a fair job of limiting how much you eat at a given situation, but the fear is that you might end up eating them more frequently because they’re portable and heck, they’re only 100 calories,” Wansink says.
Cottage Cheese You’d think those creamy curds would be full of calcium, but they rate only 106 mg per cup. Better: calcium-enriched cottage cheese (400 mg) and low- or nonfat yogurt (350 mg).
10 Health Foods that Aren’t…
by sandra gordon
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Diet Soda Zero calories, yes, but zero nutrients, too. For only 90 calories, you can have a glass of skim milk — and 350 mg of calcium, points out Liz Marr, R.D., an American Dietetic Association spokesperson in Denver. Regularly drinking soda instead of milk now could lead to osteoporosis. Moreover, scientists in Boston found that drinking one or more regular or diet colas every day doubles your risk of metabolic syndrome — a cluster of conditions, including high blood pressure, elevated insulin levels, and excess fat around the waist, that increase your chance of heart disease and diabetes. One culprit could be the additive that gives soda its caramel color, which upped the risk of metabolic syndrome in animal studies. Scientists also speculate that soda drinkers regularly expose their tastebuds to natural or artificial sweeteners, conditioning themselves to prefer and crave sweeter foods, which may lead to weight gain, says Vasan S. Ramachandran, MD, a professor of medicine at Boston University School of Medicine and the study’s lead researcher. Better choices: If it’s fizz you’re after, try sparkling water with a splash of juice. By controlling blood pressure and cholesterol levels, preventing diabetes, and not smoking, you can add 6 to 9 l/2 healthy years to your life.
Granola The fat content of a half-cup serving rivals that of a McDonald’s hamburger — and the fiber count is mediocre. A better bet: any unsweetened cereal with “bran” in the name. Other potent fiber sources to pack in include beans, peas, lentils, sweet potatoes, oatmeal, pears, bulgur, and raspberries. Most of us get just 14 to 17 grams of fiber per day, but adding just 10 more grams to your daily fiber quota can reduce your risk of dying from heart disease (the nation’s number-one killer) by 17 percent and from dying in general by 9 percent, according to a Netherlands study. Researchers credit dietary fiber’s super powers; it reduces total and LDL (the bad) cholesterol, improves insulin sensitivity and blood pressure.
Honey Nutrient-wise, it’s roughly equal to table sugar. A sweeter deal: molasses — with traces of potassium, calcium, iron.
Spinach It’s full of iron — but also full of oxalic acid, which keeps iron from being absorbed. Don’t skip spinach entirely, though — it’s still high in fiber, beta-carotene, and vitamin C.
Tofu For years, soy protein has been thought to be good for your heart. But a report by the Agency for Healthcare Research and Quality (an arm of the National Institutes of Health), which evaluated 68 randomized studies, found that no
…and 10 Foodsthat Are Healthier Than You Think
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conclusions could be drawn on the beneficial or harmful effects of soy protein and cardiovascular disease. “Soy protein just doesn’t have a big effect on heart disease risk,” concludes Alice Lichtenstein, DSc. Still, if you eat soy foods like tofu, which are low in artery-clogging saturated fat, instead of say, red meat (which can be a sat-fat haven), you may come out ahead. Or, you could just eat more vegetarian meals. “If you have high cholesterol or a family history of heart disease, aim for one meatless meal per day,” advises Mikelle McCoin, R.D., senior nutrition director at the Gladstone Institute of Cardiovascular Disease in San Francisco.
Wheat-Grass Juice Other than chlorophyll, which humans don’t need, this healthy-foody drink has no nutrients.
Zucchini Squash the thought that zucchini is anything more than 95 percent water. Reach for yellow butternut or acorn squash instead.
Do Eat These Unsung Heroes…
Avocados Yes, they contain fat. But it’s mostly monounsaturated — the type that lowers artery-clogging cholesterol. Look for those with smooth skin. They’re lower in calories and fat than the rough-skinned kind.
Bell Peppers Ounce for ounce, green peppers have twice the vitamin C of oranges; red or yellow peppers have four times as much — plus the antioxidant beta-carotene.
Chocolate syrup It’s made with cocoa, not cocoa butter, so it has only 50 calories per tablespoon — and virtually no fat.
Lean Beef The best food source of iron is also high in immunity-boosting zinc, reports Felicia Busch, a registered dietitian in St. Paul, Minn. But be a red-meat minimalist. The latest research shows that having more than 18 ounces of red meat like beef, pork and lamb per week (about 2.5 ounces per day) can increase the risk of colorectal cancer.
Purple food Concord grapes, blueberries, red wine: They all get that deep, rich color from polyphenols — compounds that reduce heart disease risk and may also protect against Alzheimer’s disease, according to new research. Polyphenols help keep blood vessels and arteries flexible and healthy. “What’s good for your coronary arteries is also good for your brain’s blood vessels,” says Robert Krikorian, PhD, director of the Cognitive Disorders Center at the University of Cincinnati. Preliminary animal studies suggest that adding dark grapes to your diet may improve brain function. What’s more, in a recent human study, researchers found that eating one or more cups of blueberries every day may improve communication between brain cells, enhancing your memory.
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Rice The Japanese consume more than 150 pounds per person of this low-fat carb each year; Americans, a paltry 25 pounds each. No wonder Japanese culture is one of the world’s leanest, with one of the greatest life expectancies (an average of age 82 for both men and women compared to age 78 in the U.S.).
Sorbet With less fat than frozen yogurt and only 100 calories per half cup, brands made with fruit juice (check
labels) are a sweet way to get vitamin C.
Strawberries A half cup has double the fiber of a slice of whole-wheat bread and more folic acid than an orange.
Tea Both green and black teas contain a concentrated dose of catechins, substances that help blood vessels relax and protect your heart. In a study of more than 40,500 Japanese men and women, those who drank 5 or more cups of green tea every day had the lowest risk of dying from heart disease and stroke. Other studies
involving black tea showed similar results. You really need only 1 or 2 cups of tea daily to start doing your heart some good — just make sure it’s a fresh brew. Ready-to-drink teas (the kind you find in the supermarket beverage section) don’t offer the same health benefits. “Once water is added to tea leaves, their catechins degrade within a few days,” says Jeffrey Blumberg, PhD, a professor of nutrition science and policy at Tufts University. Also, some studies show that adding milk may eliminate tea’s protective effects on the cardiovascular system, so stick to just lemon or honey.
White Whole-grain Bread As you’ll notice in the supermarket and at Italian restaurants advertising “whole wheat crust,” some wholegrain breads, such as Pepperidge Farm soft wholegrain white bread, and other items are now white in color. That’s because some manufacturers are now using an albino variety of whole-
wheat flour that’s lower in gluten and softer in texture. Because the flour isn’t refined, it’s technically a heart-healthy whole grain even though it’s not brown like traditional
whole-grain breads are. White is the new brown. Look for whole wheat flour as the first ingredient on label to be sure.
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The 2010 L.I.F.F. When f September 30-October 3 Where f Galt House TIckeT
InFormaTIon f For ticket and also seminars information, go to www.louisvillefilmfestival.org.
An Arts Insider Must-See TEXT &
PHOTOS By GiOia PaTTOn
GiOia PaTTOn iS an arTS & EnTErTainmEnT cElEBriTy PrOfilEr.
“It was a home run!” exclaims Louisville International Film Festival Executive Director Conrad Bachmann,
referring to the inaugural L.I.F.F. that took place last October.“I could not be more excited about the birth of our
first festival,” he emails. “Everyone pulled together in one movement and it all came together. Most of the post festival comments I received were ‘how long have you been doing this festival?’” adds the Louisville native, a respected television and film character actor.
The 2010 L.I.F.F. screenings will take place at the Galt House — the Official Host Hotel for the film festival.
Bachmann’s son, L.I.F.F. co-founder Brett Bachmann, is also a co-founder of the Louisville Arts Institute, the nonprofit foundation which sponsored the 2009 event. “This year we’re launching the ‘Kentucky Youth Film Festival’ partnership with the Jefferson County School District,” he emails. ‘There are three magnet pilot high schools — Fern Creek, Pleasure Ridge Park, and Ballard.”
“What’s really exciting,” adds Brett “is that we’ve signed agreements with two distribution companies to review our accepted films for distribution.”
Featured here are Today’s Woman’s photos and interviews from last year’s Film Festival.
First-time filmmaker, writer/director/actress Fay Ann Lee, whose entry was the feature Falling From Grace.
Actress and Louisville native Jennifer Lawrence, seen holding the L.I.F.F.
acting award she won for her role in The Burning Plain, which opened the
2009 L.I.F.F. As to how Lawrence (who, since this interview is winning
critical acclaim for her starring role in the feature film Winter’s Bone )
is staying grounded in spite of her newfound fame, she explains: “I go to work every day, to and from set.
That’s my job. Red Carpet and other interviews…that’s not work. That’s just a pain in the butt that I have to put up with.”
Emmy-winning actress Kathryn Joosten of Desperate Housewives fame posing with Louisvillian Leslie Hammon at the Glassworks party. Joosten’s advice to wannabe filmmakers? “These are the kinds of things you need to come and do,” she declares. “And you need to share it with others who are just starting out, and also those who have moved a little further down along the path.”
Louisvillians Sarah & Kris Kolb with Everybody Loves Raymond Emmy-winning actress, Doris Roberts.“I’m a therapist at Seven Counties in Louisville, and in my family therapy classes, we watch clips of the sitcom Everybody Loves Raymond to analyze the family system,” begins Sarah, who, yes, is pictured in her wedding gown, as she and her groom were spending their wedding night at the Galt House. “And when I heard that one of the ‘moms’ from Everybody Loves Raymond was across the hall from where my husband and I had been celebrating with friends, I knew I had to speak with her!” explains Sarah with a laugh.
The Louisville International Film Festival
Dancing in the Dark! Aidita Bartolomei and David Herman of Louisville, seen salsa dancing. One of the highlights for the L.I.F.F. was K-Dogg, the fantastic DJ for the rooftop party, whose mix of music (from salsa and hip hop, to Michael Jackson) kept the rooftop party swinging.
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If you would like to include your event in our upcoming issue, send it to [email protected]. Please include a hi-res jpeg image (photo should be 300 dpi at 4x6 size). We must receive your information at least 6 weeks in advance. No phone calls, please.
ThingsfNOT TO MISS this month5
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cONNecTIONSf
1# That the reality series Kathy Griffin: My Life
on the D-List recently concluded season 6 on the BRAVO network says a lot about the continuous popularity of the two-time emmy-winning Griffin, who as of 2009 is also a New York Times #1 Best Selling author with the release of
her memoir: Official Book Club Selection, A Memoir According to Kathy Griffin (Ballantine Books). A few years ago when I interviewed Griffin, whose comedy acts aren’t a series of jokes, but instead hysterical reenactments (and no holding back opinions) of her personal encounters with real-life celebrities, she said: “The thing is, celebrities do take themselves too seriously. And we live in a world where more people probably watch Entertainment Tonight than the nightly news. And that whole thing is just so preposterous to me! To tell you the truth, before I was on television, my standup act was all about dating. But my act has always reflected what’s going on around my life. Let’s face it, the celebrity culture is pretty obnoxious and you’d be surprised at how many celebrities (i.e. Brad Pitt, Alec Baldwin, and Gwen Stefani) come up to me and say ‘I love your standup!’” — Gioia Patton
when f September 11 @ 9:30pm where f Horseshoe Southern Indiana casino, elizabeth, IN. tickets f $35-$85 contact f Ticketmaster outlets.*Must be 21 or older to attend.
2nd annual dee edwards memorial whisper walk for ovarian cancer
September is National Ovarian cancer Awareness Month. come support the cause with a walk for ovarian cancer research and those affected by the disease.when f September 11 @ 9amwhere f Douglass Hill parkcontact f www.ovarianawarenessofky.org or call 502.708.1625
Join in the kidney walk The non-competitive pledge walk focuses on education and prevention of kidney and urinary tract diseases and the need for increased organ donation. It presents an occasion for dialysis patients, organ transplant recipients, donor families, the healthcare community, and general public to celebrate life and build long-lasting support for the Foundation’s mission.when f October 3 — Registration @ 1pm; Walk begins @ 2pm where f Waterfront Park, South Great Lawn contact f 502.585.5433 x100 to register as a volunteer
christmas in septemberGet a jump start on your holiday shopping while supporting ProdigalMinistries, which works with ex-offenders after they are released from prison by providing support, training, and motivation.when f September 30, 5:30-9p.m. where f The Olmsted tickets f $150 contact f
[email protected] or 502.386.1473
Kathy Griffin HORSeSHOe SOuTHeRN INDIANA cASINO
Frankie Valli & The Four SeasonsKeNTucKY ceNTeR
In a case of perfect timing, the Frankie Valli (lead singer and also real life inspiration behind the story of the Tony-Award wining musical Jersey Boys) is in concert exactly one month after the PNc Broadway Series tour date of Jersey Boys finished its Louisville run. Rag Doll, Walk Like a Man, Big Girls Don’t Cry; such is the love for the music of Frankie Valli & the Four Seasons to this day (five decades since their first #1 hit,
Sherry in 1962) that at the Jersey Boys performance I attended last month, audience members ranged in age from mid 20s to70-something.
When I interviewed Valli a few years ago, he commented about his amazing career: “I attribute (success) to a lot of things. It’s not just talent, it’s also luck, timing, and being relentless. You know…if anybody really knew what the chemistry…the ingredients were that made success (laughs), they could own the world!”
— Gioia Patton
when f September 19 @ 7pm where f Kentucky center tickets f $45-$90 contact f At the box office, or by phone 502.584.7777, or www.kentuckycenter.org
woman’s affair expo 2010come out and celebrate being a woman with other local women. This event will include free massages, manicures, and pedicures. There will also be a variety of vendors, food, and entertainment. when f September 25, 3-8pmwhere f Salter Dunbar Lifestyle center admission f $10 for one, $15 for two contact f 502.228.9989 or [email protected]
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Steer Clear of These Boys
By caiTlin GaynOrDating Dilemmas
After 20-plus years of life, my friends and I have seen a lot of losers and a couple of winners. This leads me to “The List.”
We’ve decided that these types of guys are not for us, and if we stumble upon one, we will kick him to the curb immediately. Here is a condensed list of a few of the fellas we are trying to avoid.
1. The mommas Boy: You will never surpass the importance of the mother in his life. RUN. She will ruin your life, and her opinion matters more to him than yours does. When you are 40 with beautiful children, do you want him saying, “My mom said we should do it this way, and I think she’s right.” Um, no.
2. The dead Beat: This one has about as much ambition as a brick wall. He expects everything in life to fall in his lap and he will always “get to it tomorrow.” He is achieving nothing in life besides maybe a new high score on FIFA.
3. The extreme Partier: Everyone likes to have a good time, but this guy takes it to an absurd level. As my friend Chloe says, “No one needs to finish an 18-pack on a Wednesday night.” Who wants to deal with a drunken slob, 24/7? Seriously, check yourself before you wreck yourself in this relationship.
4. The Game Player: My friend Brigid said she can’t stand it when the guy acts interested for a week and then he is over it. He may say he will call you the next day, but we all know that’s not going to happen. It’s a huge waste of time. Why should we sit there and wait for him to make his move? Next, please!
5. The drama king: Everything in this guy’s life is a catastrophe. He makes a big deal out of everything. If you don’t text him 37 seconds after he texts you, he thinks something is wrong. He is over-eager, pushy, and just downright annoying. Staying with this guy will ensure a soap opera relationship. Frankly, he is crazy. Steer clear.
6. The rude one: He has no social skills. He treats you like one of the guys and embarrasses you in front of other people. If you can’t take him out in public, where can you take him? Nowhere…leave him behind.
7. The sneaky one: He is secretly texting someone all night. Lots of girls write on his Facebook wall. He has lots of girl “friends,” yeah, right. You think you are exclusive, but really he has about five other girls he sees on the regular. He only wants to hang out late at night, and none of his friends even know you exist. This is probably going to end badly…
8. The creep: His opening line is that he’s “seen you on Facebook,” and you have a lot of mutual friends in common. After you first meet, his entire group of friends knows your entire life story and they consider you his “girlfriend.” This is just too weird.
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>> arthritis walk: Let’s move togetherThis nationwide movement led by the Arthritis Foundation encourages people to move to prevent or treat arthritis. You can join the movement by participating this month.when September 18, registration @ 9am, walk begins @ 10am where Louisville Slugger Field ContaCt 877.232.2898.
Bourbon Ball 26: straight UpThis fundraiser benefits the Kentucky Museum of Art Craft. The special night will include a silent auction, artists’ trunk shows, bourbon tastings, dinner by The Silver Spoon, dancing to the music of nationally recognized DJ Benzi, Kentucky crafts, and an After Party at 21C.when October 2, 7pm-12am where The Henry Clay, located at 604 South Third St. admIssIon Patron tickets are $300 per person and social tickets are $100 per person ContaCt 502.589.0102 or [email protected] or www.kentuckyarts.org
Girl Friends Forever regional women’s ConferenceExperience inspirational messages that will strengthen your spirit and encourage you in your journey, while building strong friendships with other women.when September 10, 5:30-9:30pm, and September 11, 8am-4pm
where Evangel World Prayer Conference Center admIssIon $40 ContaCt 502.964.3304 ext. 1216 or www.keepersoftheword.com
Once upon a time in contemporary pop/rock/R&B music there were singer/songwriters, (i.e. James Taylor, Carly Simon,
Bonnie Raitt, Judy Collins) who could not only actually sing, but whose melodies and lyrics were so memorable that years later you’d be able to recall their songs note for note and
word for word. Amongst those artists I refer to are the legendary trio of (David) Crosby, (Stephen) Stills & (Graham) Nash. Collaborators since 1969, I can’t think of a better ‘launching’ pad then the Woodstock Music Festival, where CSN had the mind-blowing good luck to showcase their beautiful harmonies for the very first time. Not only did this performance take place before a crowd of 500,000 but the entire festival was recorded on film and turned into a motion picture. Inducted into the Rock ‘n’ Roll Hall of Fame in 1997 and into the New York City-based Songwriter’s Hall of Fame in 2009, it’s a huge loss for current and future generations that you don’t hear artistry like these guys on the radio anymore.
— Gioia Patton
when September 11 @ 8pm where Louisville PalacetICkets $59.50-$99.50. At the box office, or Ticketmaster outlets ContaCt www.louisvillepalace.com for additional information.
original highlands arts and music FestivalOver 100 artist and vendor booths, and two stages, with live music from 11am-11pm.when September 11, 11am-12am where 900 block Baxter Ave. admIssIon FreeContaCt 502.509.6656 or www.originalhighlands.com
memory walkThe Alzheimer’s Association Memory Walk brings together family, friends, caregivers and concerned community members. Since 1989, Memory Walk has raised more than $200 million to help those battling Alzheimer’s disease.when September 11, 8:30-11am where Waterfront Park ContaCt www.alz.org
3# Crosby, Stills & NashLOuISvILLE PALACE
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RANDY NEWMANPoPS SerieS gueSt artiSt with the
LouiSviLLe orcheStra
in addition to being one of our greatest american singer-songwriters (Short People, You Can Leave Your Hat On, I Love L.A.) and film composers (Toy Story, Bugs Life, Sea Biscuit, The Natural), randy Newman’s songs have been recorded by an unusually wide range of artists, including: Pat Boone, ray charles, Peggy Lee, wilson Pickett, and Joe cocker. cocker’s You Can Leave Your Hat On was a high point of the 1986 Mickey rourke/Kim Bassinger motion picture 9½ Weeks, during which Bassinger’s character does a strip tease to the very sexy song. in 2002, after having amassed an amazing 16 academy award nominations during his career, Newman finally won his first oscar for If I Didn’t Have You from the motion picture Monsters, Inc.
— Gioia Patton
When September 25 @ 8pm Where Kentucky center tickets $30-$72 contact the box office, or by phone 502.584.7777 or www.louisvilleorchestra.org
Saddle Upthe equine Devine exhibition,
hosted by the Kentucky Museum of art and craft will feature work by artists inspired by our equine companions. the center piece of the exhibition will be a foal-sized sculpture by Deborah Butterfield, perhaps the best known contemporary equine sculptor. english photographer tim Flach and artists ando hiroshige and charles-emile Jacque will also have work on display. in addition, the exhibition will feature hand-tooled saddles, jockey silks, and a unique racing saddle autographed by more than fifteen well-known jockeys. Discussion of the industry from a jockey’s perspective, the history of african american jockeys, and the relationship between horse racing and the hispanic community will all be included in guest lectures scheduled while the exhibition is on display.When Now through october 16 Where the Kentucky Museum of art and craft aDMission $6 adults, students free contact www.kentuckyarts.org or 502.589.0102.
audubon Park 39th annual arts, crafts, and antique Festival event will also include a children’s corner, Sweetshop, outdoor café, and live music. When September 18, 10am-5pm; and September 19, 11am– 5pm Where oriole Park contact 502.635.5261 or 502.635.7322.
autumn Wine tastingthe event will feature a catered dinner, wine selections from various regional wineries, an auction and a silent auction. Proceeds benefit the operating fund of the howard Steamboat Museum. When october 1 @ 6:30pm Where howard Steamboat Museum reservations $40 each, or $300 for a table of eight contact 812.283.3728 or [email protected]
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Unfortunately about 4.7 million people in this country are bitten by dogs every year and children are the most common victims. Senior citizens come in second. The dogs involved aren’t necessarily or primarily “strange” dogs. They can also be pets that are familiar to the bite victims. Many reasons come into play as to the “whys” and “hows” of this increasing problem. Whether it be out of innocent dog play, self-defense, fear, or just plain too “ruff” rough-housing, one must remember that a dog is first and foremost an animal. Dogs generally use their mouths to hold and touch things. The more they sniff, add the licking, then top it off with sights and sounds, the more excited their world becomes. Ever notice how their nose and face is always trying to be in yours? They are “touching” you with
their face. They are downloading information about you with their eyes, nose, tongue, and ears, which just happen to be all in one general location called the dog’s head.
On the other hand, humans use their hands to hold and touch things. And they sometimes throw in fancy vocabulary and vocal pitches that can range anywhere from low guttural sounds to ear-piercing screams. Which, by the way, only excites dogs even more.
So naturally when these two forces combine in a “worst-case scenario” a little drama
What to Do anD What not to Do When Approaching & Petting a Dog
We have a love affair with dogs. Who can resist those
adorable furry faces with those big brown eyes, floppy ears, black–buttoned noses (albeit
wet), and tails with a language all their own? So irresistible at times
that we find ourselves with the urge to reach out and touch first, and ask questions later. Isn’t that what dogs are for? Petting? Don’t
all dogs just want to be petted?
By WriGlEy
WiTH HElP frOm BridGET K. SmiTH
Wrigley Writes
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can happen. To lessen the drama, here are some “what-nots and what-to dos” when approaching or petting a dog.
1. Never, ever, approach a straNge (uNfamiliar) uNleashed dog who is obviously Not with its owNer. This is taking a potentially dangerous matter into your own hands and not recommended. Leave it to the professional handlers to address this situation. Just the act of approaching a dog may be a threat or sign of dominance from you in the eyes of the dog, and their self-defense mode may kick in, which is their basic animal instinct. Running away, growling, and barring teeth are various signs that the dog is not interested in visiting with you. But also note that the dog may have just accidentally slipped away from his loving home and is lost and scared of his surroundings, and just wants to find his home and family. Understandably he may act a little anxious and fearful. Letting the dog come to you first with wagging tail or other submissive behavior may be a pretty good sign he’s not going to be a danger, but remain cautious and calm. The dog picks up on your energy.
2. to report a “fouNd or lost” dog or cat, call your local animal shelter, or humane society for helpful information. And be ready to describe: the location of animal, its color, long tail, short tail, small, medium, or large size, and other obvious characteristics. Tags worn by the animal can offer information to help find its owner. In situations like this, if the animal has been micro-chipped, it can speed up the search in finding the owner and return the animal quickly back home.
3. PETTING a leashed dog with owNer: ALWAYS ask the owner for permission to pet their dog. This is EXTREMELY important for children to learn and the safest way for them to learn to interact with a dog. Children are full of energy and exhibit quick motion and loud vocals at times. While this may be normal for people to witness, it can be a little confusing to a dog. It’s wise to teach children to practice a softer tone of voice when around not only dogs, but all animals.
Some dogs live to be petted, such as therapy dogs that are trained to visit hospitals and nursing homes. Their presence alone helps to enrich the lives of people, while some dogs prefer NOT being touched at all. So it’s always important to ask the owner, “May I pet your dog?”
If the owner agrees, slowly hold your hand out UNDER the dog’s head with
palms up. Let the dog “touch” you with his nose first to see that you are not a threat. Too many times, people mistakenly pat the dog on top of the head which leaves the dog to wonder… “where did the hand go...and why is it over my eyes so I can’t see?”
Direct eye contact is seen by a dog as a threat or sign of dominance. Unless you are very familiar with the dog and have given him a belly rub a time or two, quick gazes or looking away while holding your hand out slowly to give the dog a chance to know you first is a great way to meet half-way. Let the dog sniff you out first, and let him introduce himself to you first. “HI, how do you do? My name is Dog….what’s yours?”
With these helpful “To dos “and “what not to dos,” the “How do you dos” can be very pawsitive!
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No one really wants to invest in a time-capsule relationship.
Whether parent-to-child, friend-to-friend, or husband-to-wife, who wants to risk a piece of his/her heart by bonding with someone who has an expiration date attached? Consequently, in order to maintain meaningful lasting relationships, it’s natural to assess all the right things to do. There is great merit in that kind of behavior. But, truly, these don’ts hold more significant value.
1) Don’t lie. Every great relationship is built on trust. Once that is broken, you’ve predisposed yourself for failure. Parents come equipped with unconditional love. Outside of God, it’s best not to count on that kind of favor from others. Even with parents, there are boundaries that can’t be crossed if you maintain any sense of integrity. Betray that trust with friend or spouse and you’ll be fortunate to restore his or her faith in you.
2) Don’t compromise your principles. Values are personal. Good, strong moral convictions should never be negotiated. When someone loves you with an abiding devotion, your standards complement one another. You may agree to disagree on a given issue, but if you abdicate without being in concert with God on the issue, you will have bargained for a piece of your soul. It comes at a higher price than your heart.
3) Don’t set your expectations too high. It’s a hard hit when they take the plunge. And you can bet they will. None of us live up to lofty expectations if they don’t mesh with our personal goals. Knowing someone intimately is an invitation to explore his/her dreams, aspirations, and personal desires for achievement. Intimate knowledge also equips you to come to understand what he/she is capable of performing. Surprises in relationships feed the intrigue. The less you expect, the more you’re surprised.
4) Don’t break your promises. People often have the best intentions, but we all know where that road leads. Someone who loves you hangs his/her heart on the promises you make. The noose tightens quickly when the promise is empty.
5) Don’t let the sun go down on your anger. I wish I could claim that bit of advice, but ancient words hold timeless meaning. I can claim this: Anger never settles well on a pillow, and morning breath reeks of unresolved bitterness.
6) Don’t fail to communicate. Why does every relationship guru continue to address this issue? Because it’s truly essential. It’s not necessary for you to have a degree in communication skills; it’s just necessary for you to have some degree of them. No one should be expected to read your mind any more than you should assume what someone else is thinking. Talk with text, email, cell phone, or letter, and do it eyeball-to-eyeball, in the dark, or in broad daylight. Just talk.
7) Don’t forget to show appreciation. The best way to express your love is to show gratitude. I need to know just how important I am to people I love. It spurs me to loving them even better. It reinforces my actions. It offers a great sense of security that my investment in our relationship has not been in vain, nor is being taken for granted.
8) Don’t forget to say I love you, I am sorry, and please, forgive me. Hardest words to speak; most wanted words to hear. The heart can serve as the great tutor when the tongue can be trained to utter its knowledge. In the area of forgiveness, compassion, and understanding, it’s better to keep the heart softer than the head. Those words are like a healing balm. The I-love-you ointment should be applied frequently. Deeper wounds call for the really potent stuff!
9) Don’t walk away in time of need. It’s a wise person who knows when and how to lend a helping hand to a loved one in need. Gingerly. Tenderly. You can’t go wrong there. But sometimes, it calls for intervention. It’s painful to witness someone we love hurting. It’s more painful to realize we could have helped and didn’t. Likewise, walking away seems cold-hearted by the one in need. Even if you offered and were rejected, “part of” that person wants your help, and “all of” that person needs it. It’s a mean-spirited person who simply walks out because there is a need.
10) Don’t condemn the person, only the words or actions. Attacking the person is disrespectful. Criticizing someone you care for, whether in front of others or privately, can cause the relationship to deteriorate quickly. It’s praise that edifies and builds self-esteem. Many times, conflict and/or breakups can be avoided by addressing what was said and/or done rather than berating the offender.
Doing these don’ts will make you a better person to nurture, date, marry, and love. Having done so, win, lose or draw in any relationship, you don’t have to regret your investment.
By JOycE OGlESBy
top 10 Don’ts for Any Relationship
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MAKEOVERfBy Kristen BechtPhotos By Melissa DonalD
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HER MAKEUP rose said her favorite feature was shawn’s eyes. she wanted them to look larger. she used coppery colors on her eyes. rose says brown eyes can wear any color, but the shadow should not be too dark because it will make the eyes look smaller. she also said people with small eyes should not completely encircle the eye with eyeliner as this will also make the eye look smaller.
HER HAIRWhitney says with naturally curly hair “less is more.” she touched up Katie’s curls with a curling iron. if the hair is wet, she says, a curl enhancer gel can be used before drying with a diffuser. touch up curls after they are dry if needed, then follow-up with hairspray to lock in the curls. When wet use aveda Be curly and Brilliant texturizing Gel. once the hair has dried, use aveda Brilliant Beauty and Medium hold hairspray. she advises not to use too much product. curly hair should be worn naturally.
HER LIPSrose used aveda cherry Bud lipstick. she applied it with a lip brush and did not use lip liner. Women over 30, she says, should not wear their lipstick too dark, because it will make them look older. instead, she suggests that women in this age group wear brighter shades.
Accentuating your best features is easy — all you need are the right techniques to make it work. Aesthetician Rose Thurman and hairstylist Whitney Davis of Joseph’s Salon & Spa (3938 Dutchmans Lane, 502.897.5369), give our models who are featured beginning on page 40, some foolproof beauty tips all of us could use.
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