Turning the WheelAstrology from a Goddess Perspective

by Danielle Blackwood

Iwas acutely aware that cues from our social environment that signaled me that our union was not quite the

same as a “real” marriage.

Crossing the Threshold: Marriage by the Stars

On Winter Solstice of 2012, on the last day of the Mayan calendar, I got engaged to my partner of seven years. Earlier that day, between clients at the studio, I gave myself over to a profound feeling of peace, as I took pictures out the window of the Solstice sun shining off the buildings of downtown Vancouver. The entire city was ablaze in white light with the deep purple, snow-dusted mountains embracing it in the north. It looked like someone had thrown fistfuls of diamonds into the ocean, and they danced on the surface of the water as the sun set on the shortest day of the year. As I often do when it is slow, I threw a three-card Tarot spread for myself to pass the time.

“Is the world as we know it really coming to an end?” I asked, and, “What do I need to know right now?” Two of Chalices, Gateway, and Judgement, followed by the Chariot which insisted on “jumping” out of the deck and onto my reading table promptly appeared.

“Hmm, that’s interesting,” I mused, “deepening a love commitment, transition, change of status.” I stared dubiously at the cards. “Really? That can’t be.”

Now, I’m not going to lie; ever since my progressed Moon had recently moved into Capricorn, I was becoming increasingly aware of

I know that sounds terribly old-fashioned, but such cues made me angry, and even made me cry. Comments like, “How come you guys aren’t married?” Or just the introduction, “This is Danielle’s boyfriend,” chilled me to the bone. Never mind that we paid our taxes together, or that my partner had taken on the role of mentor and stepdad to my son for seven years; our relationship somehow lacked an integral piece that conferred status as a legitimate entity.

Astrologically, there are many variables that indicate if, and when, a union will result in marriage. (It is important to note that there are many types of marriages, and that one indicator does not always fit all.)

With shifting cultural ideals and gender roles, it has become more challenging to look at two charts and predict a traditional man/woman, institutional time of “wedlock.”

For instance, no longer is it the norm to include “love, honor and obey” in wedding vows. Similarly, the assumption that a couple must be comprised of one genetic male and one genetic female is finally changing, as a growing number of same sex couples are now able to consecrate their union not only

before family and friends, but in the eyes of the law.

Many couples today define their own idea of marriage based on alternative spiritual beliefs, personal values and the reflection of changing cultural norms. Not too long ago (and still,

in some circles) an astrologer could look to the charts, and interpret solemnizing factors that would indicate upcoming nuptials — factors which almost invariably included an interaction with a higher governing body like the Church. But, for many Pagans, hierarchical power-wielding institutions have no place in their marriage, as a couple often opts to have a ceremony affirming God/Goddess within and the sanctity of nature. These are a decidedly different set of archetypes to draw on when looking for marriage in the chart. Following are a few places to look for clues as to whether marriage appears to be in the stars for a couple.

things which previously had been quite foreign to me. I found myself craving both the societal recognition and the magical crossing of the threshold from “living together” to “sacred marriage.” Although my partner knew how I felt, he was just “not ready.” Even though I knew we were deeply and steadfastly committed to one another, I was acutely aware of cues from our social environment that signaled (to me) that our union was somehow not quite the same as a “real” marriage.

SageWoman No. 84 • Women & Men 63

First Things First: The Astrology of Compatibility

First, a caveat: please remember that everyone has a Sun, Moon, Venus and Mars in their chart, regardless of whether they are male or female.The time has come to rethink outdated stereotypical gender-biased assumptions when it comes to staid descriptions of “masculine” or “feminine.” Many ancient belief systems (like traditional astrology) have some catching up to do in this department, so use your own judgement with respect to gender-essentialist factors in an interpretation. Bearing in mind that no single factor in a couple’s reading will make or break a relationship, it can be helpful to use astrology to illuminate the underlying psychic motivations between two people in a couple.

The first thing to consider is a careful overview of the charts of the two individuals involved to get an idea of how each is manifesting the symbols of potential in his or her birth charts. Which is to say, to look at how they are actually living their charts. The Sun and the Moon are traditional significators of so-called masculine and feminine attributes and are often looked at in determining compatibility between two people. Traditional astrology has it that the Sun is the archetypal masculine (The God) representing the ego, the male, and the animus. In this view, the Sun is outwardly-directed energy, the father and the yang principle. The Moon is seen as archetypal feminine (The Goddess) representing the soul, emotions and the anima. The Moon is inwardly- oriented reflective energy, the Mother, and the yin principle.

Looking at the compatibility between a couple’s Sun and Moon signs will tell much about how they

will be able to support one another emotionally, and also something about whether their sense of purpose is in harmony.

The next direction to look would be Mars and Venus — two “relationship” planets. Mars is the Warrior, our ability to assert ourselves effectively and the way we express our sexuality. Venus is our personal style in relating to others, and our attitude toward what we value. Do the Mars and Venus in the couple’s charts “speak to each other”? Or, do they sidestep, confront, or tend to do their own thing?

Lucky Seven: The Seventh House of Partnerships

Another useful area with which to assess marriage potential is the 7th House of Partnerships. Looking to any planets in or on the cusp of that house can give us some idea as to what we are seeking in a partner. What we project onto the Other in the seventh is often a part of ourselves that we want to bring into balance, and it is very common to find our mates in the sign on the cusp of our seventh house. For example, I have Taurus on my 7th house cusp, and my partner has Taurus rising. He, on the other hand, has Scorpio on the 7th, and you guessed it; I have Scorpio rising. So we see in each other our own projected ideals of what a partner should be. Observing whether planets from our charts happen to fall into each other’s 7th house is another clue and can tell us something about the lessons and growth opportunities we can expect to have with our significant other.

A Time for Every Purpose When attempting to predict

when marriage (or intent of marriage) might take place, it is also helpful to note if any planets

SageWoman No. 84 • Women & Men64

are transiting the seventh house at a given time. Saturn gives the matters of of any house it transits gravity. Thus, Saturn crossing into the seventh house can mean a relationship has reached a point of fruition. Or, it can mean that a relationship will undergo a period of restructuring.

Several weeks before my fiancee asked me to marry him, his Saturn crossed into his seventh House of Partnerships. Unbeknownst to me during this time, he had been in a flurry of secret shopping for the perfect ring. Meanwhile, in my chart, Jupiter (the expansive planet of happiness, good luck and opportunity) had just crossed into my Seventh House. So, after seven years of wondering if we would ever cross that threshold in our relationship, the time was finally ripe for both of us.

When my partner came to pick me up from work that Solstice eve, I got in the car and he suggested we go to our favorite Tunisian restaurant for dinner. I noticed he was wearing a shirt that I particularly liked. Feeling a little bit blah at the end of my work day, I asked him if we could go out the next evening when I was feeling better. Always one to recover cheerfully, he offered, “Well, let’s go get some of your favorite foods and go home, there’s a lantern procession going past our house and through Chinatown later, so if you feel better, that could be fun; I got us some really cool lanterns.”

So, we went to the cheese store (which is more of a temple for cheese lovers), gathered an armful of succulent delicacies — including Moroccan sundried olives, espresso-dusted smoked artisan cheddar and a still warm baguette — and we went home. Going to the fridge to pull out some sparkling water, I noticed a bottle of champagne tucked in the

SageWoman No. 84 • Women & Men 65

crisper, and thought, “Wow, he’s really gone all out this Solstice!” There was also a very intriguing bottle of wine on the counter wrapped in red paper with drawings of merry skeletons all over it. Not our usual Friday night bottle! Beside the bottle were two beautiful paper lanterns with flying birds, butterflies, and flowers painted on them. I just felt like curling up in front of the fireplace, eating cheese and opening that curious bottle of wine.

And so it happened as we were sitting cross-legged on the floor in our own home, in front of the fire with the winter stars quietly shining above the apple tree just outside the window. Bending close to me, he said, “I want to ask you something, but you have to stand up.” Even down to that last second, I was clueless; I thought maybe he had rearranged something in the living room and wanted my perspective on it. Only when he was down on his one knee, holding a tiny black box sparkling with a secret magical light, and actually saying the words, “Danielle, will you marry me?” did I allow myself to know it was real.

That was many months ago, and I have to admit there has been a subtle shift in the way I carry myself, the way I think about our relationship, and yes — in my opinion — in the way society views us as a couple. For me, it’s not about being validated in the eyes of a man; and, it’s certainly not about having our union sanctified under the scrutinizing gaze of a disembodied sky god. It is something much deeper, much older, and evokes a sense of mystery and initiation that

inspires me to think about the sacredness of ritual and my own connection to the Goddess in a visceral way. I have the uncanny sense of being in step with untold generations of women throughout all of time and across all cultures, who in their intention to bond deeply with another, have aligned themselves

with the sensuousness of Aphrodite; the devotion of Parvati, and the wild joyous abandon of Flidais.

Now as the buds in that apple tree are swelling in anticipation of bursting into bloom this summer, we are planning the magical day that will be our Handfasting. Did I see these indicators in our charts ahead of time? Yes, I did, but I’ll be honest, I was kind of starting to give up hope of it ever happening. And, although I saw those portents “in the stars,” I didn’t want to allow myself to get carried away and found every other interpretation possible to keep myself and my hopes in check. But, looking at our charts in retrospect, there it is — all laid out in sparkling detail — on December 21st, 2012, Winter Solstice. Truly, though it was hardly the Mayan Apocalpse that many dreaded, for us it was the last day of the world as we knew it, and the Rebirth of the Light. i

Danielle Blackwood is a certified professional Astrologer and Tarot reader. She has practiced earth-based spirituality rooted in the Celtic and Wiccan traditions for twenty-five years. She is a freelance writer, watercolor artist and author of Banyen Books’ astrology column The Cosmic Weather Report. To book a reading with Danielle, visit her at www.urbanpriestess.ca .

Danielle and her beloved, Jamie

SageWoman No. 84 • Women & Men66