getting real without getting fired
TRANSCRIPT
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Getting Real without Getting Fired SAYING THINGS IN A WAY PEOPLE CAN HEAR
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Allison PollardAgile Coach
“My passion is helping people
discover their agile instincts and develop
their coaching abilities.”
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Marcus KingArchitect, Technical Coach
“It is truly inspiring to watch a group
capable individuals become a coherent
technical team.”
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Activity I• Look around• Introduce yourself quickly• State whether or not you trust that person• Laugh awkwardly
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Activity I Review•Was anyone universally trusted or not trusted?
•How did you reach conclusions about others?
•How did this impact your ability to be trusted?
•Why do you think you are or are not being trusted?
•How did you try to communicate trust?
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Putting a Box Around Trust“ TRUST IS THE HIGHEST FORM OF HUMAN MOTIVATION. IT BRINGS OUT THE VERY BEST IN PEOPLE .”
– STEPHEN R. COVEY
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What is Trust?
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Low Trust Experiences
“TRUST IS LIKE OXYGEN, YOU DON’T REALLY THINK ABOUT BREATHING, BUT ONCE YOU DON’T HAVE IT, YOU NOTICE IMMEDIATELY.”
– STEPHEN R. COVEY
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Perceptions Reinforce Behavior
SHE DOESunchecked bad behaviors
I SEEunchecked bad behaviors
I DOunchecked bad behaviors
SHE SEESunchecked bad behaviors
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Direct Communication Is Key“ THE SINGLE BIGGEST PROBLEM IN COMMUNICATION IS THE ILLUSION THAT IT HAS TAKEN PLACE .” – GEORGE BERNARD SHAW
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Rebuilding Trust
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Radical Candor
RUINOUSEMPATHY
MANIPULATIVEINSINCERITY
RADICALCANDOR
OBNOXIOUSAGGRESSION
CARE PERSONALLY
CH
ALLEN
GE
DIR
ECTLY
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Activity II• Form small groups of 4 – 5• 1 – 2 Observer• 1 Giver• 1 – 2 Receiver• Giver and Receiver(s) role play uncomfortable situations• Observer(s) provide feedback
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Situation I• Chicken
TEAM(S) DEATH MARCH TOWARDS A 6 MONTH DEADLINE THAT EVERYONE KNOWS WILL BE MISSED IS FINALLY BUBBLED UP TO AN EXECUTIVE LEADER THE WEEK BEFORE THE DEADLINE
TWIST: LEADER IS NOT HAPPY AND RIGHTFULLY WANTS TO KNOW WHY IT IS BEING BUBBLED UP AT THE LAST MINUTE
RUINOUSEMPATHY
MANIPULATIVE
INSINCERITY
RADICALCANDOR
OBNOXIOUSAGGRESSION
CARE PERSONALLY
CH
ALLEN
GE
DIR
ECTLY
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Situation II• The Cake is a Lie
LEADERSHIP LETS GO A TEAM LEADER TO IMPROVE TEAM DYNAMICS AND MUST TELL THE TEAM AS PROJECT DEADLINE LOOMS.
TWIST: A TEAM MEMBER GETS UPSET ABOUT THE LEAD BEING LET GO
RUINOUSEMPATHY
MANIPULATIVE
INSINCERITY
RADICALCANDOR
OBNOXIOUSAGGRESSION
CARE PERSONALLY
CH
ALLEN
GE
DIR
ECTLY
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Situation III• Trolls
INTERRUPTING A HEATED DEBATE BETWEEN TEAM MEMBERS TO TRY TO TURN THE HEAT DOWN BEFORE IT GETS OUT OF HAND
TWIST: THE TEAM MEMBERS BEGIN TO TURN ON YOU AS YOU TRY TO RATCHET DOWN THE ARGUMENT
RUINOUSEMPATHY
MANIPULATIVE
INSINCERITY
RADICALCANDOR
OBNOXIOUSAGGRESSION
CARE PERSONALLY
CH
ALLEN
GE
DIR
ECTLY
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ConclusionSHE DOES
Respectful challenge
I SEECaring personally
I DORespectful challenge
SHE SEESCaring personally
START THISCYCLE