Have you ever heard your child say, "Ihate school"? If so, you know how deeplyit can penetrate your heart. Parents can re-spond in a variety of ways.

Denial: "You've probably just had abad day."

Blame: "If you didn't have such a badteacher, this wouldn't be happening."

Anger: "Just deal with it. Why, when Iwas your age, I walked through snow, saton a wooden bench and ate dinosaurbones for lunch."

Empathy: "I can see how much youdon't like school. Let's try and figure outhow to solve this together."

When you determine the reasons be-hind your child's aversion to school, you'llbe in the best position to help him or her.Without playing the "blame game," exam-ine all factors, especially those involvingthe student, teachers and parents.

The Student FactorDepending upon your child's age, there

can be a wide range of contributing fac-tors, some easier to resolve than others.

Preschool AngstYour child is anxious about starting

something new.

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w w w . o v e r l a n d c h r i s t i a n . o r gMetcalf and 74th Street Overland Park, Kansas 913.722.0272

SSSSSSOverland Christian SchoolsFully Accredited by the Association of Christian Teachers and Schools

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Help your child love school from preschool through high school

by Jody Capehart

Easy steps to ensure school year

success

See SCHOOL page 7

As most of us are just beginning ournew school year, we’re rely-ing on our tidy, new sched-ule to keep us on track,right? Trouble is, we’re find-ing it difficult to actually fol-low that schedule!

Sound familiar?Don’t be discouraged!

Especially if you are a newhomeschooling mom! Itwill get easier, and you willfigure out what works foryour family! Here are fivehelpful tips I’ve learned, andam still learning, when put-ting together a schedule!

1. A Schedule is a Goal:The most important aspectwhen putting together aschedule is to keep in mindthat your schedule is thegoal you’d like to accom-plish in your school day. It’sgood and prudent to have agoal, and for a homeschoolmom, scheduling our day is wise. But thereality is, things will happen in our daythat can’t possibly be planned. Having anexpectation of accomplishing our sched-ule every day will only bring frustrationand make us feel like we’re failing.

I am a schedule girl! They make senseto me. However, for some of our homeschool years, keeping to a routine, ratherthan a schedule, worked when life wasmore difficult for us.

Do what works well for you, but relaxif things don’t always go according to plan.

2. Trial and Error: After 11 years ofhomeschooling, I am still learning thateach year brings new opportunities forcreativity and brainstorming. Ideally, Iprepare a schedule that I hope will workbased on the knowledge of subjects, time,outside classes/activities, and family dy-namics. However, as we put things to thetest, I will tweak several times before I feel

like we’ve reached a realistic schedule. Youwant a good flow to your day, and to getas much accomplished as possible, but al-

ways keeping in mind Tip#1…..it’s a goal! And,don’t give up if yourschedule isn’t workingright away. Keep tweak-ing!

3. No Schedule is Per-fect: “A man’s heart planshis way, but God directshis steps.”

One of my favoriteProverbs that helps me toremember that we are tomake plans, and that mak-ing plans (or schedules) isgood. But the bottom lineis, God will direct our dayand that may look verydifferent from the prettyschedule we worked sohard on. But this truthshould bring us comfort,too. To know that ourdays, our steps have beendirected by God should

help us to handle those off days better.4. Don’t Compare to Others: It’s so easy

to view other moms’ schedules and thinkthey’re doing something right or betterthan you. Don’t fall into that trap of dis-couragement. Each family is unique andevery schedule will look different. It’s greatto gain ideas and learn from other home-schooling moms, even trying some oftheir tactics and time frames. But if itdoesn’t work for your family, don’t let thatdiscourage you. Find what works for youand be content with whatever God leadsyou to do!

5. Don’t Be Hard on Yourself: I ampreaching to myself on this one. As a vet-eran homeschooler, I KNOW better than

to be too hard on myself when the dayruns in the opposite direction of continu-ity.

Currently, we are four weeks into ournew year, and we are still trying to figureout a good schedule. Consequently, I haveallowed myself to be discouraged over it.

It may be that this is the year we justdon’t find a reliable schedule and will have

to rely on our trusty routine again. Rou-tine for us means we rise, eat meals, beginschool, take naps and go to bed at ourusual times, but everything in betweenhappens as the day allows. With six stu-dents, three little ones that require super-vision, and a baby on the way, things aregoing to be a little crazy. I am one personjuggling a LOT.

I need to be content to just do the bestwe can each day, and trust that it’s enough.

I want our schooling hours to be a joy,not a burden.

If we are hard on ourselves due to highexpectations that can’t be achieved, home-schooling will prove to be just that….aburden and not a joy.

As hard as homeschooling can be attimes, it is a gift to be able to teach our kidsat home. Let’s make the best of it and passon a legacy of joy, and a love of learning toour children!

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5 Tips for schedulingyour homeschool day

by Candace Sabo

“However, for someof our homeschoolyears, keeping to aroutine, rather thana schedule, workedwhen life was more

difficult for us.Do what works wellfor you, but relax ifthings don’t always

go according toplan.”

“I want our schooling hours to be a joy, not a burden.”

Your child hasn't spent much time awayfrom you and has separation issues.

Your child has a fear of going to thebathroom unassisted.

Your child has social issues withother children.

Elementary StrugglesYour child may begin to notice that

other kids in the class are catching onmore quickly and fears falling behind.Your child may become withdrawn oroverly aggressive, or he or she may be-come the class clown to cover upshame or embarrassment.

Your child may be subject to bully-ing on the playground, in the bath-room or at lunch. These areas shouldbe safe places for your child but some-times can be just the opposite.

On the positive side, in these ear-lier years, your child is still in a self-contained classroom. The teachershould be an advocate and commu-nicate with parents to help deter-mine, and intervene, if she's awareof bullying, a learning issue or someother contributing factor behindyour child's negative feelings. Worktogether with the teacher to find asolution.

Middle School/JuniorHigh Challenges

Your child feels vulnerable and isless likely to enjoy school duringthese years because of everythingthat is changing—physically, emo-tionally, mentally and socially.

Your child is entering the dialectic stagein which he or she has a high need to de-bate, dialogue and dispute everything.

Your child is trying to discover his orher identity. The more confident yourchild is — knowing his or her unique per-sonality and learning style and how it af-fects learning — the more he or she will

feel equipped and empowered to learn.

The Teacher FactorAs a parent, it's natural to want the

teacher to perfectly understand and in-stantly grasp how your child learns. Real-istically, teachers have classrooms full ofstudents who often learn in different ways.

Some years you are blessed to get ateacher who understands your childand his or her particular learning style,and other years that's just not the case.Unless there is an obvious due causefor concern, be careful not to impugnthe teacher.

When you do feel it's appropriateto talk to your child's teacher, set upan appointment, be prepared to ex-press your concerns with grace andbegin positively. "I'm having a con-cern," you might start out, "and Ithought you would have some goodinsights into how we can solve this."

The Parent FactorOf course, we can't overlook an-

other factor: ourselves. So, take adeep breath!

Could you possibly be part of theproblem? Are your expectations toohigh? Does your child learn differ-ently than you or others in your fam-ily? It's easy to think that the way welearn is the only right way, and thenwe attempt to mold others to ourway of learning.

Remind yourself that your child iswired by God for a unique and spe-cific purpose. Then remind your sonor daughter of that truth from God'sWord (see Ephesians 2:10, for exam-ple). Above all, listen with an openmind and a heart of wisdom, and

pray to see the situation through the lensof love.

–Used with permission of Focus on theFamily

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him or her. Without playing the blamegame, examine all factors, especially

those involving the student, teachers and parents.”

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A successful school year begins withteamwork—among you, your child andyour child’s teachers. As your child headsback to school, consider these suggestionsfor building a positive, collaborative rela-tionship with his teachers. Go to Thriving-Family.com and search “Teaming up WithTeachers” to get worksheets on communi-cating with your child’s teachers.

❱❱ Treat the teacher as an expertBe positive in your attitude and ap-

proach, making it a habit to contact theteacher under positive circumstances.Showing up only when you want to dis-cuss a problem can push a teacher into de-fensive mode as soon as you walk throughthe door.

❱❱ Ask, “What can I do?”When discussing your child, start many

of your questions with, “What can I do ...”Let the teacher know you and your childare taking responsibility for learning.

❱❱ Recognize limitationsRecognize that there are practical limi-

tations on expectations of your teacher. Ifyour child needs to follow a certain systemfor keeping track of homework, create thepaperwork yourself so that the teacherneeds to only fill in a few blanks.

❱❱ Be objectiveDon’t rely solely on the information

you get from your child about a particularincident. Naturally, your personal loyaltyrests with your child, but do your best to

look at the situation objectively and see itthrough the eyes of the teacher.

❱❱ Discuss with your childDiscuss the conversations you have

with the teacher openly with your child.Emphasize the positive areas that you andthe teacher discussed, and brainstormhow to use those strengths to improve inother areas.

❱❱ Value varietyHelp your child understand and value

a variety of teaching methods. Everyteacher is a lesson in learning. By helpingyour child appreciate the unique styles ofdifferent teachers, you’ll prepare him touse his strengths to cope with life’s manyother differences.

—Cynthia Ulrich Tobias, author of TheWay They Learn

Teaming up with your child’s Teachers

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