The Ryman LegacyChapter 2B – The Joys of

Children• Even more children

• Still not enough moneyBut what else is new?

By Mzyra

Marina

Nicola

Terry

“Zzzzzz… Leave Sean alone, Kimmy, maybe we can get a kitten if we’re good… zzzzz.”

Oh, the wonders of night time…

“Zzzzzz… Look at all my money… Kimmy doesn’t get any, she can sleep in a box in the street… zzzzz…”

… when all the children are sleeping…

“Zzzzzz…. Cheese sandwiches…. No cheese for stupid Sean…. Zzzz…”

… and there’s such a thing as silence for once…

Well, silence for most, anyway. Others finally get a chance at some ‘alone time’ without children running and arguing all over the place. Of course, Birch and Carla would obviously be sensible with their time, having learnt the lesson of how difficult children were, surely.

And being outnumbered two-to-one was indeed difficult. Little Nicola wasn’t purposely any trouble, but she needed a certain amount of help and attention and Marina needed some attention occasionally, but the twins were always at each others’ throats.

“Maybe if I can start an art gallery of all my paintings we could make some money!”

“Nobody will ever want to see your stupid, ugly paintings Sean – you’d have to pay them! Like you’ll have to pay somebody to like your stupid, ugly face!”

“Kimmy, leave Sean alone – you’re not ugly Sean, you look just like Dad – have you ever heard the saying ‘if you haven’t got anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all?’”

“She’d never say anything if she believed that!”

Yes, Nicola was a complete breath of fresh air in comparison to some of her older siblings. Naturally Carla loved all of her children equally, but… let’s just say it was easier to do that with some more than others.

It was just as well Nicola was the last child they would have to deal with.

Or not. So much for being sensible…

Of course, the twins weren’t all bad – they were capable of being good and working exceptionally hard – if you made it into some kind of competition between them.

“Mummy! I got an A+! I got it before Sean did! I beat him! Now you have to love me more!”

“While I’m very proud of you Kimmy, that’s not the way it works…”

“Well it should!”

“I got an A+ too, Mum! I got it before Kimmy, she just pushed me out the way to get off the bus first! Love ME more!”

“Look, I love both of you equally, it’s not a competition!”

*Grumbling*

Jane: “Fresh air! Oh how I have missed you!”

“Please, please Mrs Ryman – can you please adopt me? The orphanage is like a jail! They feed us gruel and make us have cold showers and stuff! I want to live out in the countryside with you!”

“I’m sure it’s not that bad, Jane… And besides, I might be pregnant with twins again (*shudder*) and we’re not allowed more than eight people in a household… But you come home with one of my children practically every day, so it’s almost like you’re living here anyway!”

*Sigh* “Okay…”

“I’m an only child and we’re so much better off than you orphaned losers or this lot with their too many children that they can’t afford! My parents were sensible enough to only have the one, perfect child and then not die about it!”

“…Are you sure you don’t want an adoptive twin sister, Tessa?”

“And I can like do your homework and we can go to the park and play and then when we’re teenagers we can gossip and talk about boys and all those things…”

“I dunno… I like having all my parents’ attention and stuff.”

“I’ll make sure not to get better grades than you, just please help me get out of that place!”

“… I’ll think about it.”

“Um, Tessa? Would you mind sitting up, please? It’s not a great view…”

There was great parental excitement at the prospect of losing one burden and gaining a helping hand around the house, while Marina was excited to become a teenager and Sean was happy that Marina would be big and strong enough to stop Kimmy trying to beat him up. Not that he couldn’t stop her himself, of course, it was just useful to have somebody big enough to pick your enemy up off her feet when things got tough…

And Marina wondered whether there might be a way she could help Jane…

But Marina had seen enough of little siblings growing up quickly to appreciate that you shouldn’t want to grow up too fast; she might miss being a kid one day.

“Hurry up and grow up, ‘Rina, then you’ll be big enough to make me sandwiches when Daddy’s at work!”

Kimmy was as supportive as ever.

The luck that had been experienced at childhood with good outfits had apparently worn off for Marina, who was sporting Jan Tellerman-esque fashion. Luckily, with the number of promotions Birch had gotten recently, this was no longer the end of the world…

And Marina did get to help Jane, by growing her up with her. Though she got repaid by Jane completely out-doing Marina in looks and fashion – that’s gratitude for you.

“Hooray! Now I’ll get to live separately from the boys! No more mixed showers!”

Marina still felt good about her good deed, anyway.

“Oh. My. God. What do you look like and what are you wearing?”

“Gee, thanks. Yeah, this would be why I’d like to buy these clothes, thanks very much.”

“I can’t believe you actually wore those clothes into town!”

“I didn’t have much of a choice, now can I please buy these clothes?!”

“But I just can’t believe-”

“Well it’s better than your hideous plastic green apron!”

“… I can’t believe you just said that to me!”

“Argh!”

A lot-longer-than-it-needed-to-be later, Marina had established her new look for her teenage years. It communicated her good-girl-ness, her neatness and her love of little children. And it was quite flattering, though a little shorter than she might have chosen.

Still, she’d be able to quickly show that she wasn’t at all easy. She wanted to find her one perfect man and then she’d never look at any other guy. And they’d have lots of little children of their own… She sighed with her own imagined future contentment.

In the meantime she could go home and look after her parents’ little children…

“So… I hear you got an A+? That’s pretty good, Sean.”

*Blush*

“Especially when you’ve got your sister bugging you all through your classes. It sucks that they assume you want to sit next to each other all the time.”

*Embarrassed mumbles*

Sean hadn’t struggled to talk to Jane before, but something about the teenage girls made it hard for him to talk. Or think. It was just a well he had some time left before high school…

“How’s my sweet little girl who’s going to stay this small and sweet forever, hmm? Come to Mummy!”

Nicola followed her older siblings in learning skills: quick to walk, slow to talk. Carla almost wished she hadn’t gone to the hassle of teaching the twins to talk. She vaguely recalled them almost being this sweet and quiet once upon a time. She could have sworn they even hugged once… but that seemed ridiculous now.

“What are you reading, Kimmy?”

“Cookery book.”

“Oh, me too. Interesting, isn’t it?”

“I read that book aaages ago – back when you were busy being stupid playing along with Sean’s stupid lemonade idea. I’m on way more difficult cookery books now!”

“It isn’t a competition, Kimmy!”

“Sure it is! And I’m going to beat you!”

*Sigh* “Whatever…”

With Marina hopefully able to pick up some of the child-rearing slack while Birch was at work, Carla learnt to meditate to stop her pregnancy being quite so exhausting. Of course, it was impossible to meditate once the twins came home, but for 6 hours during the day and 9 hours at night, Carla had the opportunity to meditate in almost silence. And pray that the next pregnancy would only be one child again.

Marina woke up and stretched, greeting her first new, exciting, day as a teenager!

And quickly discovered that it wasn’t half as much fun as people made it sound, at least when you have three younger siblings.

*Grumble* “My new slippers are getting all wet…”

“These sandwiches suck, Marina! Why couldn’t you make them, Daddy?”

“I have to gain skills for work, sweetheart. And the sandwiches are okay for a first attempt.”

“Better than that muffin you managed to burn the other day, Kimmy!”

“Shut up Sean, or I’ll make you shut up!”

“I’d like to see you try!”

“Oh yeah, it’s going to be so difficult just because you’ve been skipping like a girl!”

Birch and Marina: *Sigh*

Marina did hope to find one good aspect of being a teenager, however…

“Oh, h- hey Nery… I hoped you might have grown up too…”

“Wow. Um, thanks- you- you look great Marina. I like your dress… And your hair, it makes you look pretty.”

“I like your outfit too, it’s a lot better than the one I grew into…”

“I expect you looked really nice in that too, though! You’d look good in anything…”

*Blush*

*Blush*

It was surprising that they ever managed to do or say anything else with each other, they were so shy, but…

Marina finally got up the courage to do what they both wanted to. And it was painfully sweet and adorable, with hearts and butterflies and everything.

Not much was achieved with the rest of that afternoon, except a lot of daydreaming and staring shyly at one another.

Again, it was painfully sweet.

“Hmm. I haven’t found the recipe for cheesecake yet, but how hard can it be? It’s like maths: cheese x cake = cheesecake. Obviously…”

“Why are you out here reading so late, Kimmy? It’s past your bedtime. And it’s too dark to read.”

“Because cheese x cake does NOT = cheesecake.”

“Ah, that’s an easy – though BAD – mistake to make, Kimster. How about I teach you some of the secrets I’ve picked up through my culinary career some time?”

“Really? That would be great!”

“Sure, just not now – go to bed and we’ll do it another day.”

“Yes, Daddy…”

The time had come, once again, to add to the family. It could be so very good… Or it could be so very bad. All Carla knew was that it still hurt almost as much as the very first time she’d had to do it.

But soon she was holding a little baby boy who looked – worryingly – like Kimmy, at least for the moment.

“Hello there! How’s about the name Terry for you, little guy?”

*Burble*

Finally out of her maternity wear – and this time it was definitely once and for all! – Carla got to try on the outfit Marina had bought for her while out shopping.

A figure! She finally had a figure once again! Of course, the outfit she’d transitioned into when she dropped out of university had given her a figure, but it also would have given her a bit of a reputation, whereas this outfit was flattering but modest and matched her eyes. Hooray for having a teenage daughter with fashion sense!

Carla just wished she would get to wear it for longer before her age caught up with her…

It was lucky for Marina that Carla was too happy and distracted to realise that she had stolen her opportunity to be a child’s first word for once.

“Mah-ree-nah!”

“Mah-wee-uh!”

“Maria? Well, we both know who you mean, right?”

“Hug!”

That was one word Nicola definitely liked. And Marina loved looking after the children all the more for it. As long as she didn’t really classify Kimmy as a child.

“Daddy! You’re home!”

“Oh, hi Kimmy! You don’t normally run to hug people do you?”

“Teach me to cook now!”

“Well I’m actually quite tired-”

“YOU PROMISED!”

“Okay, okay! Maybe for just an hour or so…”

~ More than an hour later ~

“… and so even though people think that putting cheese in chocolates will be disgusting, we manage to make to make it work. You just have to be careful not to let the cheese clog the machinery up. And that’s enough for today, right?”

“It’s only been two hours Daddy! What if I go through the rest of my life making less than perfect grilled cheese sandwiches or something?”

*Sigh* “Okay, fine… Oh, but if you’re really that dedicated to grilled cheese, you’ll develop a magical ability to create perfect sandwiches out of thin air anyway.”

“…Really…?”

It was remarkable how many friends Marina managed to bring home from school, despite how introverted she was, but then this appeared to be the same for all the children. Even Terry, who couldn’t even talk, attracted random people he’d never met. Though if Opal Raymond was anything like Marina, she would have a sixth sense for small children in the proximity.

“This doesn’t fill me with a sense of fulfilment like I’ve been told it should…”

Opal apparently found slightly larger children more interesting, unlike Marina.

“And then you yell like this and pound your chest!”

“…Um, no offence, but that looks pretty crazy to me…”

“It’s not crazy, it’s dead manly if you can get it right, even for a boy of your age!”

Opal’s eccentricity was such that Sean was shocked out of his inability to talk to older girls though, which could be considered a benefit.

Even though everybody knew than Nicola was lovely, everyone still had a little underlying fear that somehow childhood would turn her into Kimmy mark two. Sean could barely bring himself to celebrate, but Marina would celebrate at any family event and Kimmy just liked making a lot of disruptive noise.

Nicola wasn’t quite as fashionably co-ordinated as her older siblings had been as children, but her outfit wasn’t too bad as outfits went. Not that you could pay any attention to that when she smiled up at you with her big innocent eyes alight with happiness.

“Does this mean I can have a bedroom of my own now?”

Unfortunately, it did not.

Meanwhile Marina got practice dealing with babies while she still could. They were so small and sweet and fragile, she couldn’t wait to have one of her own-

Or maybe she could.

Terry may have been adorable on the outside, but he apparently didn’t have a very strong stomach on the inside. Or maybe with three carers with more time on their hands he was being fed too much. Either way, Marina had to kick Kimmy out of the bathtub prematurely soon afterwards.

It may have been considered a little weird that most of Birch’s friends were small children. Small female children. But with such shy kids of his own refusing to spend enough time with their guests, it was often left to him to make friends to boost his career, though the conversation often wasn’t quite of the standard adults should probably have.

“School sucks. Jane used to sit next to me and do my work, but now she’s a teenager I actually have to pay attention! When am I ever going to need to use maths anyway?”

“Formulas can be useful you know, Tessa. I, for instance, have come up with the exact formula for knowing when a grilled cheese sandwich is perfectly cooked…”

“Hi bus lady!”

“Um. You may want to leave the baby here…”

“No, he’s coming to school with me – I’m hoping that exposure to high school subjects at such a young age may make him a child genius!”

“… Okay… But if he gets sick or anything over the seats, you’re cleaning it up!”

“Oh. Um, no, he never gets sick, he’ll be fine…”

*Hooray, my little brother’s going to be a genius! Maybe he’ll dedicate it to me when he wins the Nobel Peace Prize!*

*Stare*

Only time would tell if Marina’s plan would work, but Nery could have pointed out to her that Terry spent most of his time at school asleep. He didn’t point it out, however, since he was worried she wouldn’t like him any more if he did.

Other children were learning in a more conventional way.

“And so when you divide two fractions you turn the second one upside down-”

“Mum, do I have to learn this?”

“Maths is very important, Nicky.”

“But I think what you do is more important – raising future adults in a good way so the whole world will be better! Fractions seem a bit silly in comparison…”

Carla was flattered by her importance in Nicola’s world view. “Oh, well… Okay, imagine you’re raising 5 children and you’ve made one pie and you need to split it – then you’ll need fractions! And there are other situations…”

How to feel about the youngest child growing up?

On the one hand, no more crying and changing diapers all the time. On the other hand, Terry might become a Terr-or and babyhood may be the best he got in his life.

Still, only one way to find out…

Birch’s nose had passed to every single one of their children, but Terry broke the mould by being the only child to get Carla’s mouth. He was also the only one to grow up completely bald, but that was quickly reconciled.

Terry proved to be just as adorable as his siblings and – though they couldn’t quite tell yet – possibly even nicer than Nicola. Hopefully another good toddler and childhood before the hormones kicked in.

Bless.

“Okay, who’s been cramming the chocolate machine full of cheese?”

~End of Part B~ Do they really mean it when they say they’re done having children (please)? Is there a plot slowly building up here? Who will be heir (going to have to decide soon)? Will I finish the essays (that I’ve been putting off while writing these

chapters) in time? Did you notice the picture continuity errors?

Find out the next time I massively need to procrastinate from work!