Dawn of a New EraWelcome to the very first show of Warhammer Wresting Inc as we travel north to historic Belgarath Tower for the start of the Round Robin tournament for the WWI World title!

Opening

The lights in the arena go dark and "Master of Puppets" by Metallica begins to play on the JumboTron. Once the video ends, the lights come on and we pan around to the excited crowd and end up at the commentary table with Matthew Empson and Neil Dizon.

Empson: "Hello and welcome! My name is Matthew Empson and sitting next to me is-"

Dizon: "Neil Dizon! It was supposed to be Erica Kelly, but I got to the seat first tonight so she can go *beep* herself silly with a carrot!"

Empson: "Don't rack up the FCC fines tonight, Neil. I would hate for this company to go bankrupt too right after opening like the last one we worked at."

Dizon: "No fines! That's what the several second delay is for. It's all about the *beep*s, mother *beep*er!"

Empson: "Oh dear lord...help me. Tonight we begin a new era in wrestling. We will begin with the first go-round of the Round Robin tournament for the World title and we will end with a large battle royal to determine who will become the very first Enemy Territory champion and go on and invade other

federations for greater glory!"

"The Imperial March" by Metallica begins as Allen Anderson walks out from the back while leaning on a wooden cane with a silver skull topper. He smiles at the excited crowd.

Anderson: "Welcome, my friends. Welcome to Warhammer Wrestling Inc. Here we will show you what violence really means to us. We will show you people fighting to shed blood for glory and the chance to be one of the brightest stars in the entire world of wrestling. We will show you sights that you will carry with you until the day you die and pass these nightmarish battles onto your children so that they will grow up in the shadow of these obscene displays of vulgar bloodshed and grow to champion them as well. In time...the very words violence and bloodshed will become one with the meaning of Warhammer Wrestling Inc. Thank you and enjoy the show..."

"The Imperial March" by Metallica begins again as Anderson makes his way to the back.

Empson: "That was...horrific."

Dizon: "Yeah, man! Someone's gonna BLEED tonight!"

Empson: "Damn it...if only Erica was a little bit faster at getting to her seat tonight..."

The JumboTron lights up with a rolling marquee. "Who will win the Round Robin Tournament and the World title?"

Group A Match One

Theobald: "This next match is scheduled for one fall. Featuring first the challenger, weighing in at two hundred and thirty-nine pounds....Hunter Valentyne!"

There is a notable silence as Hunter Valentyne walks out from the back and heads to the ring. The fans hold their tongues in anticipation of the match to come and just watch Hunter climb into the ring.

Empson: "I guess Hunter hasn't had the chance to pick out a theme song since getting out of jail and

preparing for his debut match here in our debut show?"

Dizon: "Pure excellence doesn't need a theme song. That or the censors would not allow him to use his first choice in Prisoner of Love..."

Empson: "That would not be a good song, no."

Dizon: "But so true. I wonder how many people he violated in prison? I'm shocked that Erica Kelly hasn't run down to the ring to pretend to be his valet. I guess she must know that he swings that way since being in jail."

Theobald: "And his opponent, weighing in at two hundred and forty-eight pounds...Joeylights!"

Hunter and Joeylights meet each other in the center of the ring and Joeylights begins the match by throwing lefts and rights at Hunter, who dodges or blocks every shot. Hunter grabs Joeylight's wrist and pulls him into a hip toss that sees Joeylights landing on his head. Hunter cocks his head with an emotionless glance as Joeylights quickly works his way up, but Hunter lunges at him to catch him under the jaw with a knee that sends Joeylights back to the mat hard.

Empson: "Hunter dominating early on. His expression is creeping me out though."

Dizon: "He learned inner peace in prison I hear. The kind of inner peace you get from anally violating some guy with a feminine figure..."

Hunter picks the stunned Joeylights up and-

Empson: "Already with the Valentyme?"

Dizon: "Hunter learned in prison to not always mess around with foreplay since the guards may come break up his fudge packing session..."

One...Two...Three!!!

Theobald: "Winner of the match via pinfall...Hunter Valentyne!"

Empson: "Well? Hunter did conserve energy for his appearance in the battle royal for the Enemy Territory championship later in the night."

Dizon: "And taught Joeylights to stay clear of him during that match as well!"

Group A Match Two

Stephen Theobald: Ladies and Gentlemen, the next match is the second match in Group A of the Round Robin Tournament to determine the first ever Warhammer Wrestling Inc. World Champ! Introducing first, Hailing from Asheville, North Carolina. She stands 5 feet 10 inches tall and weighs in at 155 pounds. She is.. ALEXIS BLAKE!!!

Hero by Skillet plays over the PA and Alexis Blake makes her way out to a somewhat mixed reaction as the British Crowds are not yet familiar with her and makes her way into the ring, playing to the crowd before getting to her corner or the ring and getting warmed up for her match.

Matthew Empson: And here is Alexis Blake. Interesting factor in that both of our fighters are from the U.S., though opposite coasts as Alexis comes from the East Coast, and the former British colony, North Carolina, and Valora will be coming from the West Coast. Should make for an interesting match... especially since we have word that Alexis HAS flown her family out here to watch her big debut match.

Neil Dizon: Okay, first off... Valora is NOT American. Shes a Mexican who happens to be an American Citizen. Secondly, you tryin to be hip with the whole East Coast/West Coast thing would have been cool, if it wasnt like... 15 years or so out of date. Alexis Blake is in serious trouble. Theres a sexy, spicy latina in the back thats promised to humiliate Alexis in front of her family..

Stephen Theobald: And introducing her opponent. Hailing from Los Angeles, California. She stands 5 feet, 5 inches tall and weighs in at 145lbs. She is the Hardcore Icon, VALORA SALINAS!!!!

Prayer by Disturbed plays over the PA as Valora makes her way out, also to a mixed reaction as the British crowds are slightly more familiar with Valora but not much more. Valora paces around the entryway, looking out over the crowd before pointing at Alexis Blake and slowly dragging her thumb across her throat. She then makes her way to the ring, hopping up to the apron and slingshotting herself over the top rope, landing on her feet as she leans back in her corner, her trademark sadistic smirk on her face as she mouths Vals gonna Kill you.

Matthew Empson: And here we have the rather thug-like Valora.. I tell you, look up bully in the dictionary and theres a picture of this psycho next to it.

Neil Dizon: Hey! Dont be rippin on my girl! Not all of us are rich white assholes like you. Some of us had to fight for what we get! I think Valoras an inspirational story! Shes fought a deck stacked against her her entire life to be where she is.

Matthew Empson: Wow. Thats almost word for word how Valora says it. Did she write ALL of your commentary for you? Or are you being lazy and just taking anything she says that sounds cool?

Neil Dizon: Man.. I hope Valora kills you next.

DING!!

DING!!

DING!!

The bell rings and Alexis Blake charges out of her corner towards Valora trying for a clothesline, but Valora ducks the clothesline attempt and jumps up, nailing Alexis in the face with a pele kick, sending Alexis to the mat hard. Valora smirks and charges the ropes and rebounds off the ropes flipping over Alexis, landing in a sitting jawbreaker. Valora to her feet again and charges the ropes again and plants both feet in Alexis face as Alexis sits up, knocking the woman flat on her back. Valora immediately goes for the cover.

1...

2..

Alexis kicks out!

Matthew Empson: Amazing opening sequence by Valora, but it seems that Alexis isnt going to just lay down for Valora!

Neil Dizon: By the end of this match, shell wish she had.

Valora pulls Alexis to her feet and Alexis nails Valora with a left forearm shot, a right cross and another left forearm, before charging and nailing Valora with a dropkick that sends the Mexican fighter to the mat. Alexis Blake climbs the turnbuckle and dives off, trying for an elbow drop but Valora rolls out of the way and Alexis hits nothing but mat.

Matthew Empson: Alexis fires back! Shes taking the fight to sociopathic Mexican! But she just barely missed that elbow drop off the top rope!

Neil Dizon: Valora might not be as old as some of the other veterans, but she is still a veteran. She knows what shes doing in that ring and I think shes about to give Alexis a lesson in pain!

Both women roll to their feet and Alexis throws a punch but Valora bursts forward, blocking the punch with one arm, driving her other hand into the chest of Alexis Blake, stunning her for a moment. Valora boots Alexis in the gut and lifts Alexis up in the air, but Alexis escapes, landing behind Valora and taking her down with a Russian legsweep.

Alexis drags Valora to her feet and nails Valora with a few punches to the face but Valora blocks one and counters by taking her right elbow and nailing Alexis across the face, bringing the same elbow back a fraction of a second later, nailing Alexis from the other side of her face, bringing an explosion of blood from the face of Alexis Blake.

Matthew Empson: Oh My LORD! I think Valora broke Alexis nose there! That will seriously affect Alexis in this match and in the battle royal!!

Neil Dizon: Thats my girl! Put that rich white *Bleep* away!

Alexis staggers around the ring holding her nose, dropping to a knee as she tries to stop the bleeding. Valora looks to the crowd and makes the motion of sniffing the air, indicating she smells blood as that sadistic smirk crosses her face and she hooks the arms of Alexis, getting her in position, lifting her up and dropping her right on her head with a Vertebreaker. Valora immediately rolls over and makes the pin...

1...

2..

3!

DING!!

DING!!

DING!!

Stephen Theobald: Ladies and Gentlemen, the winner, by pinfall, VALORA SALINAS!!

Valora grabs a mic and walks over to Alexis and smirks, looking down at her.

Valora: I told you, Id make you bleed. Be glad I didnt end your career tonight, gringa. Come back when you learn how to fight.

Valora drops the mic next to Alexis and rolls out of the ring, making her way to the back.

Matthew Empson: Valora picks up an all important win in the tournament, but did she really need to rub it in like that, Neil?

Neil Dizon: Of course she did! What fun is it to win a fight if you dont rub it in to your opponent?!

Group B Match One

Theobald: "This next match is scheduled for one fall! Featuring first the challenger, weighing in at two hundred and sisteen pounds...Maxwell Soloke!"

"Deadlihood" by Sixx AM begins as Maxwell Soloke walks out to the cheers of the fans. The crowd changes to boos when Devin Stone rushes out and smashes Maxwell in the back of the head with a steel chair. He smashes him a few more times before striding to the ring with a laugh.

Empson: "Well that was just uncalled for!"

Dizon: "I like it! I love it! I want some more of it!"

"The Imperial March" by Metallica begins as medics rush out to check on Maxwell Soloke. Allen Anderson is not far behind him.

Anderson: "Thought that was cute, Devin? Really? If you had waited for the bell to ring to start the match? I might have let that slide, but since you are ruining the chance for the fans to watch a great match? You are disqualified from this match! Furthermore? You will not be attending the battle royal at the end of the show. Now...get out of my ring AND this arena!"

Empson: "Anderson laying down the law tonight!"

Dizon: "Maxwell might have made it to the ring so he could get squashed. He might have. Anderson laying down a heavy hand here tonight. The wrestlers may not like him for it!"

Empson: "It shows that he wants ratings as well as blood. One sided matches don't always bring ratings."

Group B Match 2

Empson: "We have yet another bad report. Dark Angel was unable to make it into England."

Dizon: "Are you sure she wasn't just drunk someplace like Eric Dillinger was?"

Empson: "No, I'm pretty sure not. She was held up the same as Apathy and so the victory is awarded to Tarrasque, who is here."

Dizon: "This whole tournament is starting to be a bust, you know."

Empson: "I'm sure once passports and such are figured out? The quality of things will have a big improvement."

Dizon: "If you are sure...then fine. Let's go right into the battle royal then with the people who managed to show up tonight."

Battle Royal for the First Enemy Territory Championship

Empson: "Everyone is gathered in the ring and ready for the match to start."

Dizon: "Yeah Anderson didn't want to waste a hafl hour or more of people's time introducing each star when they can get right down to the ring and start fighting."

Empson: "It's actually not a bad idea."

Dizon: "I want that on record! Matthew sided with the boss on something."

Empson: "The show is being recorded?"

Dizon: "Oh yeah...I forgot."

When the bell rings, the entire ring erupts in a mass chaos of fists and elbows. The very first victim is Joeylights when Hunter Valentyne grabs him by the back of the head and sends him flying over the ropes. The second is when Joker drops Johnathan to the mat and then shoves "Knife Edge" Takeda Yokosuda over his fallen form to fall outside of the ring. Tarrasque hefts Molly up in a press slam position to hurl her out of the ring when Candice and Jessica grabs his legs and send both of them out of the ring.

Dizon: "People are falling from the ring like rain!"

Empson: "They all really want that Enemy Territory championship!"

Lilly sends Johnathan Mills over the ropes and then turns to drop kick Candice over the top rope. Valora grabs Alexis Blake by the shoulders and bloodies her face with a massive headbutt before sending her flying over the top rope.

Empson: "Neil...do you see a little red flashing light under the ring?"

Dizon: "No? Wait. Yes? Is that important?"

Empson: "I'm ducking under the table. Maybe you should do the same."

Dizon: "If you think so..."

With the sound that would seem to signal the end of the world, the ring explodes with fire and rage. Smoke fills the lower sections of the arena and no one can see anything. Medics begin rushing into the cloud of smoke and debris while Allen Anderson and Druscilla come out to the stage.

Anderson: "What the Hell is this? Who the *beep* blew up my ring?"

Druscilla: "And is everyone alright?"

Anderson: "And yes...who is trying to kill my meal tickets? I mean...check on people! MOVE!"

As the smoke clears, only one ring post is standing and the ring is in tatters. Two people remain in the ring. Lilly and Maxwell Soloke.

Empson: "We have two people left in what's left of the ring!"

Dizon: "Holy crap...I think I need changed."

Maxwell and Lilly meet in the ring and Maxwell catches Lilly with a super kick. She lands next to the one standing ring post and it topples over, sending Lilly sliding to the floor.

Empson: "Maxwell Soloke has done it! He's won the very first Enemy Territory championship!"

Dizon: "Nice. Explosions, people flying, and now a new champion. The ratings for this show are going to tank. Aren't they?"

Empson: "Like you wouldn't believe, but Warhammer is a rich company and they can try again. Maybe get the passports and backstage treachery straightened out."