what people are saying about bill butterworth · in dealing with the challenges of the fast paced...

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What People Are Saying About Bill Butterworth: John Maxwell, President, The John Maxwell Company: Bill Butterworth knows how to communicate! He brings passion and expertise to his presentations. He knows how to deliver the goods. It’s my pleasure to recommend him to you. Chuck Swindoll, Chancellor Emeritus, Dallas Theological Seminary: My long-term friend and trusted colleague, Bill Butterworth has a genuine love, a desire to strengthen relationships and delightful skills in communicating. I am pleased to recommend him to you. Rick Warren, Pastor, Saddleback Community Church: It’s a pleasure to recommend Bill Butterworth to you. He always delivers the goods. His humor, authenticity and love are contagious. Lee Strobel, Author, The Case for Christ: Bill Butterworth is one of the most captivating and effective communicators I’ve ever seen. I appreciate his winsome style and practical, insightful teaching. Bill Hybels, Pastor, Willow Creek Community Church: Bill Butterworth is a rare communicator. He reaches people of any age or stage in life. His warmth and humor make even the most difficult challenges easy to accept. He works his way right into your heart. Craig Barnes, President, Princeton Theological Seminary: I know of only one person better at telling parables than Bill Butterworth and that’s the Savior to whom Bill is clearly devoted. This book is important, not only for its relevant content, but also as a model of effective communication. Jud Wilhite, Pastor, Central Christian Church: I appreciate Bill’s style—simple, without being simplistic.To the point, but not at the expense of humor, wit and grace.

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Page 1: What People Are Saying About Bill Butterworth · in dealing with the challenges of the fast paced software industry. ... New Life After Divorce Workbook The Promise of the Second

What People Are Saying About Bill Butterworth:

• John Maxwell, President, The John Maxwell Company: BillButterworthknowshowtocommunicate!Hebringspassionandexpertisetohispresentations.Heknowshowtodeliverthegoods.It’smypleasuretorecommendhimtoyou.

• Chuck Swindoll, Chancellor Emeritus, Dallas Theological Seminary: My long-term friend and trusted colleague, BillButterworthhasagenuinelove,adesiretostrengthenrelationshipsanddelightfulskillsincommunicating.Iampleasedtorecommendhimtoyou.

• Rick Warren, Pastor, Saddleback Community Church: It’s apleasuretorecommendBillButterworthtoyou.Healwaysdeliversthegoods.Hishumor,authenticityandlovearecontagious.

• Lee Strobel, Author, The Case for Christ: BillButterworthisoneofthemostcaptivatingandeffectivecommunicatorsI’veeverseen.Iappreciatehiswinsomestyleandpractical,insightfulteaching.

• Bill Hybels, Pastor, Willow Creek Community Church: BillButterworthisararecommunicator.Hereachespeopleofanyageorstageinlife.Hiswarmthandhumormakeeventhemostdifficultchallengeseasytoaccept.Heworkshiswayrightintoyourheart.

• Craig Barnes, President, Princeton Theological Seminary: IknowofonlyonepersonbetterattellingparablesthanBillButterworthandthat’stheSaviortowhomBillisclearlydevoted.Thisbookisimportant,notonlyforitsrelevantcontent,butalsoasamodelofeffectivecommunication.

• Jud Wilhite, Pastor, Central Christian Church: IappreciateBill’sstyle—simple,withoutbeingsimplistic.Tothepoint,butnotattheexpenseofhumor,witandgrace.

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• Rene Schlaepfer, Pastor, Twin Lakes Church: Bill’swriting isexactlythesameasBill’sspeaking:veryfunny,verysmart,andvery,veryrelevant.Billhasawayofsneakinguponyou—oneminuteyou’reinhystericsoverhisdescriptionofachildhoodfauxpas,andthenextminuteyou’rerealizingalife-transformingspiritualinsight.

• John Pearson, Management Consultant: BillButterworthisalwayspoignant,positiveandpowerful.Witandwisdomareatitagaininthisveryspecialbook.

• Gene Appel, Senior Pastor, Eastside Christian Church: BillButterworthisamastercommunicatorandhumorist.Billhaslivedeachwordof thisbook.Youwillfind life ineverypage.HehaspositivelyinfluencedmylifeandIknowheisabouttoinfluenceyoursaswell.

• Jamie Rasmussen, Pastor, Scottsdale Bible Church: Thetrickforanygreatcommunicatoristodothreethings:helpusunderstandtruth,getusfiredupabouttruth,andthenhelpustoliveoutthetruth.BillButterworthisamasterofallthree!

• Walt Disney Company: Wewereimpressedwithhispresentationstyle, content, and his ability to connect with the audience.The responsewe received from our convention attendeeswasoverwhelmingly positive.He is an outstanding communicator,versatileinhisapproachandcontent.

• Microsoft:Billprovidedourteamwith“down-to-earth”solutionsindealingwiththechallengesofthefastpacedsoftwareindustry.Hediditwithhumorandeasytorememberprinciplesthatkeptthegroupengagedthroughoutthesession.

• Ford Motor Company:Yourpresentationwasabigsuccess!Theentiremanagementteamstatedhowmuchtheyenjoyedit.Welookforwardtohearingyouagain.

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• American Express:Yourremarkswerechallengingandtheaudiencewasveryresponsive.Inahardchargingbusinessenvironmentitisdifficulttomaintainperspectiveandyourtalkwasveryappropriateinthisregard.Welookforwardtoarepeatopportunityinthefuture.

• Bank of America:Judgingfromtheaudienceresponseaswellasthefeedbackwehaveheard,youhita“HomeRun!”Yourmixofhumorandmessagewasjustwhatwehadhopedfor.

• Daimler Chrysler:Thankyouformakingthis thebestmeetingwe’ve had! Youwere terrific. Youwere able to bring joy andlaughtertoagroupofseniorexecutives.Iwouldrecommendyourpresentations toanygroupseeking to improvemoraleor simplydevelopkeymember’sleadershipskills.

• Young President’s Organization:Bill’spresentationsaredynamite!Hehastherareabilitytorelaxhisaudiencewithhumor,followedbyapowerful,rivetingmessagedrivenhomeforcefully.

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Page 6: What People Are Saying About Bill Butterworth · in dealing with the challenges of the fast paced software industry. ... New Life After Divorce Workbook The Promise of the Second

Also by Bill Butterworth

The Short List

Mountain in My Rearview Mirror

Balancing Work and Life

Building Successful Teams

New Life After Divorce

New Life After Divorce Workbook

The Promise of the Second Wind

Butterworth Takes A Vacation

Butterworth Gets His Life Together

When Life Doesn’t Turn Out Like You Planned

The Peanut Butter Family Home School

My Kids Are My Best Teachers

Peanut Butter Families Stick Together

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Page 8: What People Are Saying About Bill Butterworth · in dealing with the challenges of the fast paced software industry. ... New Life After Divorce Workbook The Promise of the Second

©2015byBillButterworth.Allrightsreserved.

PublishedbyRedemptionPress,POBox427,Enumclaw,WA98022TollFree(844)2REDEEM(273-3336)

RedemptionPressishonoredtopresentthistitleinpartnershipwiththeauthor.Theviewsexpressedorimpliedinthisworkarethoseoftheauthor.RedemptionPressprovidesourimprintsealrepresentingdesignexcellence,creativecontentandhighqualityproduction.

Nopart of this publicationmay be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, ortransmittedinanywaybyanymeans—electronic,mechanical,photocopy,recording,orotherwise—withoutthepriorpermissionofthecopyrightholder,exceptasprovidedbyUSAcopyrightlaw.

ISBN13:978-1-63232-403-0

LibraryofCongressCatalogCardNumber:2015938656

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To the entire Butterworth family,Who influence me everyday

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Contents

Introduction:TheCaptivationofEverydayInfluence . . . . . . . . . . .xi

Chapter1:TheCallingofEverydayInfluence. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 21Chapter2:TheCommencementofEverydayInfluence. . . . . . . . . 31Chapter3:TheConversationsofEverydayInfluence. . . . . . . . . . . 43Chapter4:TheChoirofEverydayInfluence..................55Chapter5:TheCollegeofEverydayInfluence. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 67Chapter6:TheComponentsofEverydayInfluence. . . . . . . . . . . . 79Chapter7:TheConsciousnessofEverydayInfluence. . . . . . . . . . . 89Chapter8:TheConsistencyofEverydayInfluence . . . . . . . . . . . 103Chapter9:TheCircumstancesofEverydayInfluence . . . . . . . . . 113Chapter10:TheCaringofEverydayInfluence . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 123Chapter11:TheCompanionsofEverydayInfluence. . . . . . . . . . 133Chapter12:TheCelebrationofEverydayInfluence. . . . . . . . . . . 145

Conclusion:TheCulminationofEverydayInfluence. . . . . . . . . . 159

AbouttheAuthor. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 169

=

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xiii

The Captivation of Everyday Influence

influence

in·flu·ence

ˈinflo͝oəns

NOUN

The capacity to have an effect on the character, development, orbehaviorofsomeoneorsomething.

* * *

Likeme,hisnamewasBill.Hepossessedawinsomelaugh,kindeyes,andasenseofhumor

thatpeoplefoundcontagious.Hecouldalsowigglehisears.Butotherthanthat,hewasmostlyavanillaspeckinaspumoniworld.HegrewupinarowhouseindowntownPhiladelphiainthe1920’s

and1930’s.Asa result,hehadhis shareofexperiencesbeingraisedduringtheGreatDepression.HisbrotheroncetoldmethatassoonasBillwasoldenough,hewouldrunoutoftheredbrickinnercityschoolbuildingeverydayat3toworkatthelocalcornergrocerystore.HisoneindulgencewaspopularBigBandmusicandsomehowheworked

=IntroductIon

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outawaytoborrowanaltosaxophonefromhispublicschool.Classes,job,homework,practicethesax—thatwaslifeinhisworld.Peersinhisneighborhoodwerenotexpectedtogoontocollege,andneitherwasBill.ThefactthathereceivedahighschooldiplomawasmetwithasmuchprideasaPh.D.intoday’sworld.Inthosegrowingupyears,notmuchwassaidaboutnotenoughfoodtolasttheweek,ornotenoughhoursgivenhisdadathisplaceofemployment.Thesestatementsweretrue,butjustnotspoken.ThankstopeoplelikeCorneliusVanderbilt,JayGould,andAndrew

Carnegie,railroadswereamajor,ifnotthemajorindustryintheyearswhentheunlikelyinfluentialpersonnamedBillwasgrowingup.ButinstarkcontrastwithCorny,Jay,andAndy,Bill’sworkontherailroadwasatamuchdifferentlevel.Hislife’sworkcouldn’tbecharacterizedasrailroadownership,norwasitrailroadleadership,norwasitrailroadmanagement.Billwasclassicbluecollar,workinginthefreightdivisionoftherailroadwhosenameyouknowevenifyoudon’tknowrailroads.Ifyou’veeverplayedMonopoly,youknowtheReadingRailroad.Billworkedforthemfor41years.Hisentirefamilyoforiginwasallabouttherailroad,fromthetipoftheircowcatchertotherearplatformoftheircaboose.HisfatherwasanelectricianfortheReading,andhisfather-in-lawwasaReadingengineer,steeringthemightyIronHorsedownthecoldsteeltrails.Bill’sbrotherandthewomanwhowouldbecomeBill’swifesoldticketstopassengersattheReadingTerminalonMarketStreet,justacoupleofblocksfromCityHallindowntownPhiladelphia.Blue-collarworkontherailroadwashardwork,as seen inBill’s

callousedhands.Itwasoutdoorwork,eveninthedeadofwinter,asseeninBill’sruddycheeks.LikemanyAmericancompaniesintheearly1940’s,BillwaspromisedhisjobontherailroadwouldbeheldforhimwhenhereturnedfromhisstintinthearmyduringWorldWarII.Andtheykepttheirpromise.Whenaskedtodescribehismilitaryservice,Billwascharacteristically

amanoffewwords.“IdroveatankinNorthAfrica,”hewouldanswersuccinctly.

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“Didyoueverseecombat?”“No.But I did see Eisenhower once.”Hewould laugh, give a

lightningfastwink,andawiggleoftheears.MoreimportantthanseeingEisenhower,whenBillgotbackfrom

thewar,BillsawCaroline.ShesoldticketsrightnexttoBill’sbrother,Joe.Theymetin1950,marriedin1951,andhadababyboyin1952andababygirlin1958.Inmyriadways,BillwastheclassicfatheroftheBabyBoomerfamily.Itwasallaboutmakingsurethewifeandkidshadfoodtoeat,clothestowear,andaroofovertheirheads.Therejustwasn’ttimeinthedayforconversations,orlongwalks,orevencheeringkidsonattheirLittleLeaguegames.Otherthingsweremoreimportant.Billneverhadmuchtosay,buttomakemattersmorecomplicated,

hewasdiagnosedwithcanceronhisvocalchordswhenhewasinhisforties.Thegoodnewswastheywereabletocutoutallthecancer.Thebadnewsisthattheytookafairamountofhisvocalchordsduringthesurgery,sofortherestofhislifehewouldspeakinaraspysoundingvoicethattooksomegettingusedtoandwasamajorsourceofembarrassmentinhislife.Ifhewasamanoffewwordsbeforethecancer,afterhewasjustaboutwordless.Billbreathedairthroughthree-quartersofthetwentiethcentury,

from1921till1996.Inanodd,almostmacabrestatementofsimilarity,hediedat75,justlikehisfather,hismother,hisoldersisterandhisyoungerbrother.Iknewhimfor44yearsandhewasthemostinfluentialpersoninmylife.Billwasmyfather.

* * *

ItwasThanksgivingDay1960.Iwaseightyearsold.A crisp late autumnmorning, Iwas bundled up inmywinter

wardrobe—plaidflannel shirt,worncardigansweater,darkcorduroypants,woolsocks,scuffeduploafers,alltoppedoffbyawintercoat

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andhatwithflapstocoverone’sears.Inthiscoldweathergarb,twoofmythreemostdistinguishingphysicalcharacteristicswereconcealed.Iwasoverweightformyage,butitwascloakedundertheamplewintercoat.AndIhadwhiteblondehair,completelyhiddenbythehatmadefamousbytheRussianarmy.Allthatwasleftasdistinctwasthepairofeyeglasses,jet-blackframes,andmagnifiedlenses.ClarkKentmeetsMr.Magoo.“YourfatherworksonThanksgivingsohecanhaveChristmasday

off,”mymomexplainedtome,asshedouble-checkedtoseeifmysweaterwasbuttonedandmyjacketzipped.ItwouldhavebeenunthinkabletogetthatmuchverbiageoutofDad.“Therailroadrunseverydayoftheyear,sowearethankfulhehasenoughsenioritytogetDecember25thoff.”Inoddedinsilentagreement,butinmymindtherewasabigger

storythanDadhavingtoworkonThanksgiving.Dadhasinvitedmeto go to work with himonthisThanksgiving

holiday.Mostofhiscoworkershavethedayoff,soitwillbeaquieterversion

ofadayontherailroad.Ican’thonestlyexplainthemotivationbehindmyfatherinvitingme.Iwanttosaythatitwasbecausehewantedsomequalitytimewithhisonlyson.ButitwouldbemuchmorelikelythatDadwastoldtobabysittheboybymyMomsoshecouldgetalltheextratasksaccomplishedforourextendedfamilyThanksgivingdinnersetforthatafternoonwithalltheuncles,aunts,cousins,andgrandparentsarrivingatourhouseaboutthesametimetherailroadmenwouldbeheadinghome.Isaidgood-byetomymotherandwanderedoutthebackdoorfrom

whichmydadhadalreadydeparted.Hewasinourcar,a1957FordFairlane500,alreadywarmingitupforourdrivefromthesuburbstothedowntownriverbank.Excitedlyhoppingintothefrontpassengerseat,IwassurprisedtohearmyDadactuallymakeacomment.“YourmotherandIlistentoWFILontheradio.”(ThiswasafactIalreadyknewsinceitwaswheretheradiowassetatthehouseaswell—560 on the dial, relax awhile with WFIL. Philadelphia. WFIL—asthejinglewent.)

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“IlistentoUnclePhilsyonthewaytoworkandthenIlistentoWeeWillieWebberonthewayhome.”Radiowasdifferentbackthen.Todayitseemslikeyouroptionsareall-talkasinTalkRadio,orallmusic,asinaTop40stationwhereavoiceonlyinterruptseverytwentyminuteswiththecalllettersofthestation.In1960UnclePhilsyandWeeWillieWebberwerediscjockeys—guyswhoplayedrecordsovertheradioandinterspersedbetweensongswittybanter,charmingconversation,andgrandentertainmentoftheirown.ItonlytookafewminutesformetodecodewhatIjustheardfrommyfather—therewillbenoconversationsinthecar.Butjustsittingnexttohiminthefrontseatwasexhilarating.Iwasdoinglifewithhim.Iwascontentwithmycar-mates,FrankSinatraandNat‘King’Cole—andofcourse,UnclePhilsy.It’sokay.Iamabouttospendthedaywithmyfatherathisplaceof

employment—anaddressofintriguethatIhadheardonlybitsandpiecesaboutovertheyears.It’sthefreightoffice—theplacewhereDadandallhisrailroadbuddieswouldcongregateearlyinthemorningandattheendofeachworkdaytoswapwarstories,bothliterallyandfiguratively.Dadhad recently beenpromoted fromCar Inspector toChiefCarInspector,andtheadditionalresponsibilitiescouldbesummarizedinthreewords—more paper work.Sothisofficehadbecomeanewhomeformyfather,althoughtheuseoftheword‘home’isquitegenerous,tobesure.“Followme,Pal,”Dadinstructed.(Henevercalledme‘Son’—it

wasalways‘Pal’).Headded,“Andstayclose.”Weclimbedaflightofrickety stairs inanold, two-storyofficebuildingmadeof redbrick,fadedofcourse,aftermanyyearsofexistence.Atthetopofthestairs,weturnedrightandwalkedintotheoffice.Itwasacompactroomwithonlyenoughsquarefootageforalargewoodendeskinthecenterandasmallerdeskofftothesideinacorner.Thewindowshadesweredrawnshutanditwasobviousthatevenonprettydays,onewouldn’twanttoopenthewindowstoenjoythebreeze.ThesmellofthemightyDelawareinthosedayswouldendthatoptionimmediately.Theofficewascold,withatemperamentalheater,soitwouldbealittlebitoftimebeforeIshedthewintercoatinfavorofjustthesweater.

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Granted,itwasThanksgiving,buttakeallthewarmthandloveandjoythatwaswaitinginthatsuburbandiningroomsettingbackhomeandreplaceitwithanofficereflectingyearsofneglect.Desks,chairs,andofficesuppliesmadeitlook25yearsolderthanitreallywas.Dustwaseverywhere.Evendirtandgrimeincertainspots.Echoesoffamilialloveandjoywerereplacedbythesolitarysoundofawallclock,workingawaythesecondswithitsceaselesspassingofthependulum.Eventhoughnoonehadoccupiedtheofficeforthelasttwelvehours,itstillhadthedistinctsmellofcigarsmokeandiftherewasanydoubt,therewasagrayhazethatfloatedatceilingleveltooverarchandunderscorethefact.Mydaddidn’tsmokesothisfragrancewasawholenewnotionformynostrils.Itwas1960,butthisrundownbuildinginthePortRichmondsectionofPhiladelphiafeltlikealocalerightoutofaDickensnovelacenturybeforewiththeonlyadditionbeingelectricity.Itwastobejustthetwoofusfortheentireofficevisit.Asifheforgot

thatIcamealongwithhim,Dadimmediatelytookhisplaceatthelargedesk,sighedasighandbeganaddressingthemountainofformsthatarosefromhisworn,fadeddeskblotter.Istoodsilently,watchinghimwork,wonderingifthiswasgoingtobehowthedayunfolded—Dadworkingatthebigdesk,mestandingbysilentlyinabitofaconfusedstate.That’swhenhelookedupandsmiledatme.Silently,hepointedhis

fingertowardsthesmallerdeskinthecorner,asifIshouldunderstandwhatapointingfingermeant.Iturnedmyattentiontoawoodendeskonlybigenoughtohavedrawersgoingdowneachsideandanopeninginthemiddleforanadulttoplacetwolegswhensittingatit.Acoldmetallampsattotheleft,afixturethatlookedoldenoughtohavecomefromEdison’spersonalcollection.Atincanofsortswasplacedontherightside,filledwithpencils,brownincolorandeachonestampedingoldwiththewordsREADING COMPANY No. 2.Butitwasthemachineinthemiddleofthedesktopthattookmybreathaway.Thecenterpieceofthesmalldeskwasthelargecontraptionplaced

uponit.Ihadseenthesemachinesontelevision,butthiswasmyfirst

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Introduction: The Captivation of Everyday Influence

opportunitytoseeoneinperson.Almostcubicalinshape,itwasamassofmetalthatfeaturedfourrowsofkeysthesizeofpennies,eachwithadifferentletter,number,orsymbolemblazoneduponit.Itwasblack,withtheexceptionofninelettersandaroyalcrestthatunfoldedalongthebackstripofblackmetal.UnderwooditreadandIwasenthralledtogetmyfirstlookatatypewriter.Dad ledmeover to the smalldesk,pulledout theequally small

chairandwiththatgesture,hesilentlyinvitedmetositdown.Onceinthechair,heleanedovermetoinsertasinglepieceofpaperintothetypewriter,gettingitintopositiontobegintyping.Boyinchair,paperintypewriter,allsystemswere‘go.’Withthatpreambleinplace,mydadutteredfourwords.“You might like this…….” healmostwhisperedinhissoft,raspytone.Andwiththatteaser,hesilentlyreturnedtohisdesk,eightfeet

away,andbeganpouringoverapileofpaperworkthathadmultipliedovertheweeksofneglectduetoweightiermattersoutintherailroadyard.Without the need of any coaxing, I began pecking away at the

typewriterkeys,eachpecksoundinglikeasmallfirecrackerexplodingillegallyinthebackyardontheFourthofJuly.Strong,boldblacklettersbegantoappearonthewhitepaper,mostinperfectorder,butafew,likethesmallletter‘a’,wouldlandalittlehigheronthelinethantheotherletters,givingitaplaceofuniquedistinction.Myfirstorderofbusinesswastorecordhowfunthistypewritingreallywas:

I am with Daddy at work.I am typing on a typewriter.I am having a really good time.

Soonthatstaccatopopwouldcreateabeautifullydescriptivesetofsentences,beingreproducedonmultiplesheetsofpaper,exceptthesecopieswereinletterform.

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Dear Mommy,I am with Daddy at work.I am typing on a typewriter.I am having a really good time.

Love, Billy

Thiswentonforhours.Lettersweretypedtoalltheaunts,uncles,grandparentsandcousinsthatwewouldbeseeinglaterthatafternoonatThanksgivingdinner.Extraepistleswerereproducedtoallmyfriendsintheneighborhood.AsIwasworkingthroughthethirtynamesofthekidsinmythirdgradeclass,Dadinterruptedmypublishingendeavorswiththesuddenpronouncement,“Okay,Pal,it’stimetogohome.”Wherehadthetimegone?Iwascaptivatedbythewholeexperience.

IhadbecomesoenamoredbytheunbelievableUnderwoodthattheentiredaywasspentsittingbeforeit,peckingaway,oneindexfingerfromeachhand,chroniclingmyadventureasifIhadjustscaledKilimanjaroorwontheNobelPeacePrize.Wehadevenworkedthroughlunch,amajoraccomplishmentfora

boywhodidallhisclothesshoppinginthedepartmentmarked‘husky.’Inthatsliceofofficetime,inthatmustysmellingroomwiththe

settleddustandthesoundofthependulum,Ihaddiscoveredsomethingmorethanatypewriter.Ihaddiscoveredwriting.Today,IsitinfrontoftheUnderwood’sgreat-great-greatgrandchildandpeckawayatthecraftIhavecometoadore.Perhapsmy lifewouldhave gonedifferently ifmydadhadnot

invitedmetogotoworkwithhimthatThanksgivingof1960.Eventhoughinretrospect,itappearstobethemostmundaneofconversations,seeminglywithoutanydeepmeaningwhatsoever,Iknowdifferently.Thatwasthedaymypassionforwritingwasfueled.Therewasalastingimpactresultingfromfoursimplesyllables.“You might like this . . . .”

Influence arrives in the simplest of ways.

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The Calling of Everyday Influence

calling

call·ing

‘kôliNG

NOUN

Astrongurgetowardaparticularwayoflifeorcareer;avocation:those who have a special calling to minister to others’ needs.

* * *

IzzywasLaureltoBart’sHardy.Averitablewispofaman,Izzycouldn’thavebeenoverfive

feet tall andhecertainlydidn’tweighmore thanonehundredpounds.Agehadnotbeenkindtothisgentle littlemaninhisearlysixties,asevidencedbythegrayhairandthemyriadwrinklesdisplayedonanyuncoveredareaofskin.Asmuchashetriedtowalkerect,hisshouldersdroopedandhehadtheslightesthintofahunchonhisback.Hiseyesightwasfailing,necessitatingthethicklenssurroundedbythelargeblackframes.

=chapter 1

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EverydayIspentwithhim,heworetheidenticaloutfit;aplainwhitet-shirt,brownslacks,brownsocksandbrownshoesthatlookedmorelikeslippersthananyothershoestyle.Idon’tthinkitwasthesameshirtandpantseveryday,butthenagain,Icannotbecertain.Without question, themost distinguishing characteristic ofmy

friend Izzywasbetweenhisnose andhis chin. Izzy’smouthwas soattentiongettingforthesimplereasonthatIzzyhadnoteeth.Tobemoreprecise,hehadteeth,buthechosetokeepthemwrappedinapieceofwaxpaper,safelytuckedintherightfrontpocketofhisbrownslacks.Besideseating,hemadeitclearthattheteethwereonlytobeusedforspecialoccasions.Asmanypeopledowhohavenoteeth,Izzyhadanervoushabitofalwaysgivingtheimpressionhewaschewingonsomething.Itwasquitethejuxtapositiontoobservethistinymanappearingtobeconstantlyeating.DearsweetIzzycouldn’thavetakeninmorethansevenhundredcaloriesonanygivenday.OntheoppositeendofthefoodchainwasBart.Thismancould

take in sevenhundredcalories inamatterofminutes.Stated in thesimplestofterms,BartwasthebiggestmanIhadevermetuptothatpointinmylife.TosayhewasenormousislikesayingMichaelJordanhadagoodrunwiththeroundball.IneverhadthecouragetoaskhimhowmuchheweighedbutIwouldguesshewasnear fourhundredpounds.Hewasinhisearlyfifties,withawaveofbrownhairthathecombedstraightbackalongwithahairproductthatkeptitinplace.Piercinggreeneyesandakindsmile,Barthadoneofthosefaceswherethechinhaddisappeared.Insteadofalittlebitofajutprotrudingfromthebottomofhishead,likemostofuswithachin,Bart’sextraweightcausedhisfacetodropdowntohisbodyinastraightline.Itlookedlikeasculptorhadchiseledoutthehead,butneverbotheredfinishingtheprojectasthefacegrewoutofanuntouchedblockofmarble.LikeIzzy,Bartworethesamethingeveryday;plainwhitet-shirt,

slacks,socksandshoes.UnlikeIzzy,theslackswereblueandtheshoesweremorelikeloafers.AlsounlikeIzzy,Barthadteeth.Mostofthem,

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anyway.Whenhesmiledtherewasagaportwothatbecameapparent,buttherewasreallynothingaboutBart’sfacethatwasallthatnoteworthy.Itwashisbodythatwasnoteworthy.Thatmassivetrunkthatwas

attachedtotworelativelyshortskinnylegswouldmakeeventhemostpolitepersondoadoubletake.HisstomachwouldhangoverhistrouserstosuchadegreethatitlookedlikeBartwascarryingtriplets.Thet-shirtdidlittletodisguisewhatwasgoingon.Itwasthesortofappearancemydearmotherusedtodescribeas‘abeerbelly.’Shehadnoideahowrightshewas.Bart,byhisownadmission,livedeachdayforfive-o-clock.Punch

histimecard,getinhistruckandcruisedownthestreettotheclosestbar.Anunmarriedman,Bartwouldspendhisentireeveningsittingonthatmetalbarstoolwiththeredvinylseat.Ifbarstoolscouldtalk,thatredonewouldhavemoanedinpainunderthemassiveweightofhis favoritecustomer.SomehowBartwouldgethimselfhome,crashintobedandmanagetomakeittoworkthenextmorningintimetopunchinat8a.m.“Whatdoyoudoallnightatthatbar?”Ionceaskedhim.“Drinkbeer,”wasthetwo-wordreply.Thenhewouldadd,“Busch

beer.”Hehadauniquewayofpronouncingtheword‘Busch’foritalwayscameoutsoundinglike‘Booosh’asheelongatedthesoundofthe‘ooo’s.I’mnotsurehowmuchBartwouldeat,butIcouldtellyouwithout

fearofcontradictionthathecoulddrinkmorebeerthantheaveragethreeguyscombined.Mostlikelyitwashisextratonnagethatallowedhimtodrinkasmuchashedidwithoutthecorrespondingconsequencesoffallingfacefirstonthefloorblindstinkingdrunk.WhichbringsusbacktoIzzy.Thesetwomen,BartandIzzy,workedtogetheratthesamefactory

in their hometown ofMiami, Florida. Bartwas the foreman in adepartmentthatincludedonlytwootherworkers.OneworkerwasIzzy.Theotherworkerwasme.EveryMondaythroughFridaythethreeofuswouldstandatourmachinesdoingourwork(I’llexplainourworkand themachines as the story continues to develop). Imanned the

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middlemachine,withBarttomyrightandIzzytomyleft.ThetwoofthemwouldconversewitheachotherasifIdidn’tevenexist.Iwasacollegestudentatthetime,sotherewasahugeagegapthatthetwoofthemdidn’twanttoattempttoclosewithconversation.Buttomakeitevenworse,IwasaBible CollegestudentandBartfoundthatfacttobeespeciallyoffensive,sinceheconcludedIwaslookingdownonhimandjudginghimforhislustformassivequantitiesofalcoholicbeverage.Thiswasnotthetruthwhatsoever,butitwasthewayBartsawitandIhadtolivewithit.AnotherpartofthereasonBartwouldconversewithIzzyrightover

myheadwasduetothenatureoftheconversation.Everydialog,forjustabouteverydayIworkedthere,couldbesummarizedinonekeyinvitation:“Izzy,”Bartwouldshoutoverthenoiseofthemachine,“youneed

tocomedrinkingwithmetonight.YouneedtodrinksomeBooosh.”Izzy’sresponsewasalwaysthesame.“Nottonight,Bart,”hewould

saywhilegumminghisinvisiblefood.Thisconversationwentonfordays,weeks,andmonths,untilthe

fatefuldayIzzysaidyestoBart’sdailyinvitation.Idon’tknowwhyIzzysaidyes,justlikeIdon’tknowwhyhehad

refuseduptothispoint.Yes,Izzywasakindman,butIwouldnotgosofarastosayhewasamanofstrongcharacterorself-discipline.IfIhadtoguess,IwouldsurmisethatIzzydidn’tgodrinkingbecausehefeltlikehedidn’thavethemoneyforit.Wewereallworkinghourlylaboratminimumwage,sonoonewasgettingrichatthisjob.ButforsomeunexplainedreasonIzzyrelentedandjoinedBartatthebarforafewbeers.Itgoeswithout saying that the innocent,youngandnaïveBible

Collegestudentdidnotjointhesetwo.Iwasn’teveninvited.ButIdidobservewhathappenedthenextmorninganditwasquiteevidentthatwhathadtakenplace thenightbeforewashavingan impactonthemorningafter.

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ApparentlyIzzynotonlyaccompaniedBarttothebar,buthealsotriedtokeepupwithhimbydrinkingasmuchbeerasBartdowned.Areyoudoingthemath?Aonehundred-poundersittingnexttoafourhundredpounderpoundingdownthebrews.Izzywasthreesheetstothewindinnotime.BartgotIzzyhomewithoutanydamage,butIzzy’sbehavioratwork

thefollowingmorningwasnotassimple.Letmetellyoualittlebitaboutourworkatthisfactorysoyou’ll

fullyappreciateIzzy’sfallfromgrace.Thethreeofusworked ina factory thatmadewallets.Notrich

leatherwallets,butplastic,vinylwallets.Thekindofwalletsthataresoldat tourist trapsas souvenirs, especially if theyaregold stampedwiththelogoofthetouristattraction.Thiswasalltakingplaceintheearly1970’sinMiami.WaltDisneyWorldwasstillayearortwoaway,sothesmallerattractionsinMiamiwerestilldrawingcrowds.PeopleflockedtoParrot Jungletoseethebirdsofmanycolorsperformtricksandsitonyourshoulderforyourphototobetaken.TouristsstilllineduptovisitMonkey Junglewhereyoucouldseechimpanzeesparticipateinshowsthatwouldgetyoulaughingsohard,you’dbeintears.Andofcourse,itwasalsobeforeSea WorldsoavisittotheSeaquariumwouldentertainyouwithwhales,sharksandthoseadorableMiamidolphins.Alltheseplacesneededsouvenirwalletsandthat’swhereourfactory

cametotherescue.Largerollsofvinylwouldbecutintorectangularpieces,whichinturnwouldbeheat-sealedtogethertocreatethewalletitself.Thewalletwasthentakentothegoldstamperfortheall-importantlogoofabird,amonkey,orafish.Bart,IzzyandIaccomplishedstepone—thecuttingofthevinylfrom

thelargerollsintothesmallrectangles.Todothis,eachofusstoodattheendofalong,narrowwoodentable.Eachoneofthemwasaboutfivefeetwideandabouttwentyfeetlong.Wewouldplacetherollofvinylatthefarendofthetableandrolloutapiecethatwastwentyfeetlong.Withaboxcutter,wewouldslicethevinylfreefromtheroll.Thenwewouldrepeatthatprocess,placinganothertwenty-footpieceofvinyl

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ontopofthepreviousone,cuttingitaswell.Wewoulddothistwentytimes,sothattheendproductwasastretchofvinyltwentyfeetlong,fivefeetwideandtwentypiecesdeep.We’dstaplethesheetstogetheronthetwooutsideedgesandwewerereadyforthenextstep.Atourendofthelongnarrowtablewasalargemachine.Madeof

steel,thecentralfeaturewasahugesteelplatethathungaboutafootabovethetable.Abovetheplateweretworedbuttons,abouteighteeninchesapart,perfectlyset,oneforyourrighthandandtheotherforyourleft.Usingafingerfrombothofyourhands,bypressingtheredbuttonsthelargesteelplatewouldcrashdownwardtowardsthestackofvinyl.Onemorepieceofequipmentwasnecessarytofinalizethisprocess.

It’scalledadieandourswasmadefromaoneinchthickpieceofwood,cutintotheshapeofthepotentialwallet.Surroundingtheouteredgeofthediewasastripofmetal,abouttwoincheshigh.Thismeantthataninchofthesteelwasexposedaroundthewoodandthatinchwassharpenedsothatuponthesteelcrash,itwouldcutthevinylintothedesiredshape.Thethreeofuswouldeachplaceourdieonthevinyl,pressthe

buttons,make thecut, remove thecutvinyl intoapile toour rightandthemmovethedieintopositiontodoitagain.Andagain.Andagain.Untilalltwentyfeetofvinylwascutup.Andthenwe’drolloutanothertwentylayersanddoitalloveragain.Itwasprettymundaneworkwithoutthepossibilityofmuchthatcouldhappentomessitup.UntilthedayIzzycametoworkhungover.Themorningafterhis‘Booosh-athon’withBart,Izzycametowork

in aworld of hurt.His usually quiet demeanorwas interrupted byconstantmoansandgroans,indicativeofaguywithamajorheadache.Afterhepunchedin,hewentabouthisnormalroutine,whichbeganbyunfoldingthetwentylayersofvinylontohislongnarrowworkstation.Itwaswhat happened next that had the lasting impact on the

situation.PoorIzzy,headpounding,musclesaching,eyesblurredandfocusdistortedplacedthedieonthevinylforthefirstcutoftheday.Inthepainofthemoment,Izzyplacedthedieonthestackofvinyl,

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unawarethatthediewasupside down.Fingersontheredbuttons,hepoundedthatdieintothevinyl,onlytodiscoverthatnocutshadbeenmade. Instead, thediehadbeen smashed, corrupted, contortedanddistorted.Thesharpedgesof theblade,previously intheshapeofarectanglewerenowinatangledwebofasymmetry.Immediatelyawareofhismistake,Izzyturnedthedieovertothe

positionitwassupposedtomaintainduringthecuttingprocess.Heplacedhisfingersontheredbuttons,pressedthemandcutthetwentysheetsofvinyl.But thedie, in itsmangledconditionwasno longercuttingperfectrectangles.ItwascuttingthevinylintoshapesthatlookedlikePicassoondrugs.Itbecameimmediatelyapparentthatitwasn’tjustthediethatwas

messedup.Thediewasimpactingthetwentysheetsofvinyl.Thedie’sshape,orinthiscasemisshape,becamethevinyl’sultimatecondition.Therewasnoescapingit.Thediewasimpactingandinfluencingthevinylbeneathit.Izzy appeareddazed and confused as hewatched themisshapen

sheetsofvinylstackup.Itdidn’ttakelongbeforeBartobservedwhatwashappeningandthescoldingbegan.“Izzy,you@#$%!”Bartscreamed.“Whatdidyoudotothedie?You’remakingamessoutofeverything!”There’snodoubtIzzywassorryforwhathadhappened,butthedamagehadalreadybeendone.Thevinylhadbeenirreparablyimpactedbytheirregulardie.Izzy,BartandIwillneverforgettheeventsofthatfatefulday.And

bytheway,somethingelseoccurredthatday…..….ItwasIzzy’sfirstdayasthefactory’sjanitor.

* * *

Weareall calledtoinfluence.Ifyouarebreathing,youhaveinfluence.Ifyou’vegotapulse,you’ve

gotimpact.Itdoesn’tmatterifyou’rebiglikeBartorsmalllikeIzzy.YoucanbeinperfectshapelikethediebeforebeingsmashedbyIzzy

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oryoucanbeasoutofshapeasanupsidedowndiethatcollidedwithasteelplate.Itdoesn’tmatter.Allofushavesignificantinfluenceinthelivesofallthepeoplewithwhomwehavecontact.Weallinfluenceothersjustlikethedieinfluencesthevinyl.This

symbolisnotoriginalwithme.Othershaveusedit,butofmostinteresttomeishowitisusedintheBible’sNewTestament.MyfirstexposuretothisconceptwaswhenIreadPeter’swordstohisfellowchurchleaders:

Therefore, I exhort the elders among you, as your fellow elder and witness of the sufferings of Christ, and a partaker also of the glory that is to be revealed, shepherd the flock of God among you, exercising oversight not under compulsion, but voluntarily, according to the will of God; and not for sordid gain, but with eagerness; nor yet as lording it over those allotted to your charge, but proving to be examples to the flock.

—1Peter5:1-3nasb(emphasisadded)

It’sthatword‘examples’thatcaughtmyattention.TheGreekwordis‘tupon’(rhymeswith‘coupon’)anditmeans‘themarkofablow,orastampstruckbyadie.’Peterisencouragingindividualstostampyourlifeonthelifeofothers,asadiewouldimpactapileofvinyl.OrlikethekeysofanUnderwoodManualTypewriterstrikethewhitepaperwiththeblacknessoftheink.It’sthesamewordthatourfriendDoubtingThomasusesafterChrist’sresurrectionwhenhesays:

So the other disciples were saying to him, “We have seen the Lord!” But he said to them, “Unless I see in His hands the imprint of the nails, and put my finger into the place of the nails, and put my hand into His side, I will not believe.”

—John20:25nasb(emphasisadded)

IneffectThomassays,“UnlessIcanseetheimpressionleftbythenails,theimpact,theinfluencethosenailsmadeonHisbody,Iwillnotbelieve.”That’s‘tupon.’

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Pauluses‘tupon’inhisencouragementtotheThessalonians:

So that you became an example to all the believers in Macedonia and in Achaia.

—FirstThessalonians1:7nasb(emphasisadded)

“Yourlifehasbeenimpactingothers,”Paulsays,“SoIampleasedthatit’sbeenapositiveimpact.”‘Tupon.’We’veallgotit,sowemightaswelluseitforgood.Perhaps

ahelpfulwaytoviewourinfluenceistoviewitaspartofourcalling.TheOxfordDictionarydefines‘calling’as‘astrongurgetowardsa

particularwayoflife.’Wetendtothinkofcallingassomethingoutoftheordinary,likeaperson’scalltoministry.But,Iwantyoutothinkoftheconceptofcallinginamuchbroadercontext.Weareall calledtoinfluencebecause,ashumanbeings,weareall

constantlyimpactingthosearoundus.Sometimesourinfluenceisgood,sometimesitisbad.Influenceisrarelyneutral.Sometimestheinfluenceisinbigchunks,butmosttimestheinfluenceisinsmall,bite-sizetidbits,andthereinlaysthesecretsauceforgreaterinfluentialeffectiveness.MosteverythingI’veeverreadonthesubjectofinfluencetendsto

focusonthebigchunks.Thesmalltidbitsaresometimesincluded,butalmostasanafterthought.Butthinkaboutthepeoplewhoinfluencedyourlife.Didn’tagreatdealofthatinfluenceoccurthroughacasualstatementinthemidstofaconversation?Ormaybeitwassomethingsmallthattheydidforyou,likepointyoutowardsatypewriterinthehopesthatyoumightlikeit.ItwastheartistAndyWarholwhomadepopulartheconceptthat

eachofuswill getourfifteenminutesof fame.That’s a fascinatingconcept,butit’ssimplynottrue.Thetruthisthatmostofuswon’tevengetfifteenminutes.Andthat’swhytheconceptofsmallersipsofinfluenceismorefar-reachingthanthebiggulp.SothisbookisfortheCEOofaFortune 500 company,butit’salso

forthefrontline,minimumwageworkeraswell.ThisisfortheSuper

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BowlMVPandtheguywhogotcutfromtheseventhgradeteam.It’sforthevirtuosoplayingCarnegieHall,andthewomanwhogaveitherbestshot,butcametotheconclusionthecellowasnothercupoftea.It’sforyourstate’sGovernor,andthepersonwholostacloseelectionfortenthgradepresident.It’snotaboutarole.It’saboutaGod-givenlife.It’sforeverybodywhohasnotyetflat-lined.Smallstuffscreamssignificance.Influenceisforeveryone.Youhaveit,whetheryourealizeitornot.

Influence includes all of us.