Lauren Schwein

TEL-T206

11 November 2010

Midterm Assignment

Buddy Holly’s Mental Hospital

When I pictured my visual aesthetic I saw an over the top drug user in this harsh

lighting surrounded by evidence of her addiction. I kept being drawn back to the

aesthetic of the movie Girl, Interrupted. I wanted a little irony, but also a song that when

listened to, could be interpreted as drug use. I found the Buddy Holly song, “It Doesn’t

Matter Anymore”, and the lyrics fit so perfectly. Phrases such as “Golly gee, what have

you done to me?” spoke to my idea of mind-altering substances. Buddy Holly is singing

about a woman, but never explicitly says so, so I just changed it to mean pills.

I wanted to show in five photographs the transition from actual drug use, to the

effect of the drugs. I first showed pill bottles scattered around the sink, with my hands

trying to open the pill bottle. I wanted to focus on the pills, and the number of bottles, as

well as the grungy sink to create an environment. For my second photograph I fast-

forwarded to the initial reaction of the drugs. I wore a lot of eye make-up, hoping to look

sickly, and tried to look over-stimulated. The next shot is a high angle shot, which I used

to make myself look small, and insignificant. The next two shots are supposed to be

point of view shots, as if I have fallen onto the ground. One shot is out of the door, and

the last shot is looking up at the ceiling.

I wanted the overall aesthetic of these pictures to be very grungy and medical. I

wanted it to look like this girl’s life is out of her control, and that her only source of

personal control, is the pills, which ironically, is the very cause of her lack of control.

Buddy Holly- “It Doesn’t Matter Anymore”

There you go and baby here am I

Oh well you left me here so I could sit and cry

Well golly gee what have you done to me?

Well, I guess it doesn’t matter anymore

Do you remember baby last September

How you held me tight each and every night

Well, oops-a-daisy, how you drove me crazy

But I guess it doesn’t matter any more

Aesthetic: Emotionally disturbed drug user with the feel of an aged mental hospital. Particularly from the movie, Girl Interrupted.