the fuddler december 2010

When you advertise in The Fuddler - you’re on line too at www.thefuddler.com!

Festive

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Staples Garden Centre, Fordfield Rd, Millbrook, MK45 2HZ Telephone 01525 402959

Workshops & Clubs available - please come in for details We stock card making supplies, decoupage, water colour supplies and much more! DMC Silks, Jewellery, beads and findings. Stockists of wool - Robin, Bretts, Peter Pan & Wendy. Get your

last Xmas Craftstuff!!

JOIN OUR CRAFT CLUB 10% Discount on all purchases.

Free tea/coffee voucher for restaurant. Monthly newsletter

£12.00 per year

WHITEHARTAMPTHILL.CO.UK Tel: 01525 406863

DROVERSARMS.EU Fine Indian dining

Tel: 01525 715 697

THAI CHILLI RESTAURANT Tel: 01525 406910

Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year to all our customers - we look forward

to seeing you soon!

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Hello everyone and a huge welcome to your festive edition of The Fuddler!As always we very much hope you enjoy this issue and please don’t forget to look carefully at all the things our advertisers are saying because there is little doubt that ‘Whatever you

are looking for you’ll find it in The Fuddler!’ From all of us here in Fuddlerland may we take this opportunity to wish you a truly joyous Christmas and a happy and peaceful New Year. Once again, a big thanks to you all for making us so popular.

Don’t worry if you missed an issue - you can catch up at www.thefuddler.com

33, RUSSELL DRIVE AMPTHILL

With Winter now here, isn’t it time you considered replacing those doors and windows? Or maybe a new conservatory to enjoy. Don’t compromise on style - call into our showroom and see our stunning range of doors and windows including “The Composite Door”.

No window or glazing job too small.


We have been asked to publish the following list of Church Services that are taking place over the Christmas period. We hope that you find this helpful.

Christmas Services in Flitwick and Ampthill

Ampthill Baptist Church 19th December, 10.45 am – Lighthouse Christmas Service 6.30 pm – Carols by Candlelight Christmas Eve 24th December 11.30 pm – Midnight Communion Service Christmas Day 25th December 10.00 am – Christmas Morning Worship at Ampthill Methodist Church Boxing Day 26th December 10.45 am – Morning Worship Sally Metianu

Ampthill Church of England – St Andrews, St Michael’s Millbrook and St Lawrence Steppingley

Christmas Eve 24th December 3.00 pm – Children's Nativity Service – Ampthill 8.00 pm – Town Carol Service – Ampthill 11.30 pm – Midnight Mass – Steppingley Christmas Day 25th December 8.00 am – Said Holy Communion – Ampthill 9.30 am – Sung Eucharist – Ampthill 11.15 am – Communion – MillbrookBoxing Day 26th December 8.00 am – Said Holy Communion – Ampthill 9.30 am – Sung Eucharist – Ampthill

Ampthill Methodist Church

19th December, 6.00 pm – Joint Carol Service with Flitwick Methodists at Ampthill Methodist Church Christmas Day 25th December 10.00 am – Joint Service with Ampthill Baptists at Ampthill

Methodist Church Boxing Day 26th December No service

Flitwick Catholic Church – Sacred Heart Church (serving Flitwick and

Ampthill)19h December, 7.00 pm – Carol Service Christmas Eve 24th December 6.00 pm – Children’s Mass of Christmas 9.00 pm – Vigil Mass of Christmas Christmas Day 25th December 9.00 am – First Mass of Christmas 11.00 am – Christmas Mass Boxing Day 26th December 11.00 am – Mass 5.00 pm – Latin Mass

Flitwick Church of England – St Peter and St

Paul Christmas Eve 24th DecemberBoxing Day morning srevice2.00 pm – Carol service with candlelight (St Peter and St Paul)

4.00 pm – Carol service with candlelight (St Peter and St Paul) 6.00 pm – Carol service with candlelight (St Peter and St Paul) 11.30 pm – Midnight Mass (St Peter and St Paul) Christmas Day 25th December9.00 am – Holy Communion with carols (St Andrews Church, Windmill Road, Flitwick) 10.30 am – Parish Eucharist with carols (St Peter and St Paul)

Flitwick Methodist Church

19th December 6.00 pm - United Carol service at Ampthill Methodist Church Christmas Eve 24th December 5.00 pm – Family Christmas Eve Communion 11.30 pm – Christmas Eve Communion Service Christmas Day 25th December 10.00 am – Family Christmas morning service Boxing Day 26th December 10.30 am - Boxing Day morning service

A M P T H I L L

CHRISTMAS GIFT IDEASSTUNNING GIFT SETS FROM GREAT PRODUCERS

12 Church Street, Ampthill, MK45 2EH Tel: 01525 405 929 Email: [email protected]

Fantastic gift ideas including beautiful gift

sets, gift wrapped wooden boxes plus great

deals on wines! Gift wrapped gifts from

just £4.99

Fields of Cabbages A Bedfordshire Tale by Maureen Kerr

‘The 1940s were years of war and austerity. This 400 page book is my grass roots glance at that era. The old house, with its Well and bucket lavatory, has gone, replaced by a modern home. The fields now buried under concrete, bricks and tarmac. A vanished life.’

Price £12.50 inc p&p direct from publisher M. Kerr at the new address: 16 St Serf's Road,

Crook of Devon, Kinross KY13 0PQ

Tel: 01577 840369 email: [email protected]

also available on-line from Amazon and other bookstores

Sharman LawS O L I C I T O R SIncorporating Sharman & Trethewy

The Solicitors who care for you,your family and your business

1 Harpur Street, BedfordTelephone: 01234 30 30 30

Email: [email protected]: www.SharmanLaw.co.uk

88 Dunstable Street, AmpthillTelephone: 01525 750 750

MULTI SKILLED TRADESPERONWe are looking for an experienced multi skilled person to complement our small hardworking and

dedicated team who provide a fi rst class maintenance service to both internal and external customers.

The successful candidate will report to the Maintenance Surveyor and undertake repairs and

maintenance works primarily to our hospitality businesses but also be expected to be fl exible

enough to work on our other properties.

We are looking for an individual who has:

• Relevant trade experience within building services

• Problem solving, planning and organisation skills

• Good communications skills

• A fl exible approach with the ability to undertake on call duties on a rota basis

• Experience of working within a hospitality environment

Interested?Please e-mail your CV and covering letter to [email protected] Should you not have internet access, please call our recruitment line on 01525 290 333 Ext 127.Closing date: 16th December 2010. No agencies please.

THE BEDFORD ESTATESWoburn, MK17 9PQ


“The Fuddler” i s pub l i she d by MDA Publications and printed by Fidelity. The views expressed herein are not necessarily those of the publisher. No part of this publication may be copied in any form or by any means without written permission of the Publisher. Copyright MDA Publications. Like to book an ad, or ask about our absurdly low rates please ring Martin on

Across: 1 Worry, 4 Wails, 10 Auditor, 11 Taboo, 12 Carve, 13 Termini, 15 Acer, 17 Crete, 19 Sense, 22 Need, 25 Compete, 27 Unapt, 29 Lance, 30 Italian, 31, Jetty, 32 Sewer

Down: 2 Odder, 3 Retreat, 5 Actor, 6 Lobbies, 7 Patch, 8 Prate, 9 Movie, 14 Erse, 16 Cent, 18 Romance, 20 Educate, 21 Scalp, 23 Eerie, 24 Atone, 26 Elect, 28 Abide

A BRIANISM I’m thinking about

getting a pet. A tortoise I think. I

don’t want anything too fast at my age.

LORD DEE’S PONDERINGS

I was holding court in a local hostelry with Cedric, Henrietta, Duster and Check-It-Out p l us other assembled company, discussing, the latest mob i le te lephone technology. I felt I ought to announce that I really do not know what I am talking about. So now you don’t know. Merry Christmas.

Ciao

Visit our showroom. Over 70 modern andtraditional fireplaces and stoves on display.

1, Woburn Street, Ampthill, Beds

Tel: 01525 841199 www.ampthillfireplaces.co.uk

Mon - Fri: 10am - 5pm Sat: 10am - 4pm

Wishing all our

customers a Merry

Christmas and a Happy

New Year

Safety Continuity PAT Testing

Call Paul for a down to earth quote

Email: [email protected] Tel: 01525 716 936 Mob: 07931 935120

Times to suit you. 1st assessment FREE -

45 mins lessons AGES 6 to 60

For further information contact Guy on 07811 364 328


Hockliffe LU7 9LS TEL: 01525 211488

www.ruggedtough.com [email protected]

If you still can’t decide on that perfect gift, we also have gift vouchers

Your

One-Stop Shop

making

Christmas Gifts

For Him Delightfu

l


1 2 3 4 5 6 7

8

9 10

11 12

13

14 15 16

17 18 19

20 21 22

23

24 25

26 27

Thanks Marjorie for all your delicious crosswords over the year!

Christmas

R

T

H

A

M I

CS

S

This has nothing to do with the crossword, but Sandra is still looking up words in her big book (dictionary?). See whether or not the word jumps put at you. (Answer at the bottom of the page if it doesn’t!)

Across: 1 Wild ox (5) 4 Mistakes (6) 9 Small spore (7) 10 Drive (5) 11 Instead (4) 12 Decayed (7) 13 Howl (3) 14 Church recess (4) 16 Seabird (4) 18 Top card (3) 20 Small cigar (7) 21 Young deer (4) 24 Homeric poem (5) 25 Affable (7) 26 Cruel ruler (6) 27 Nimble (5)

Down: 1 Hasten (6) 2 Cooker (5) 3 Common sense (4) 5 Ponder (8) 6 To odour anag (7) 7 Maroon (6) 8 Small fruit (5) 13 Indebted (8) 15 Foremost (7) 17 Metamorphic rock (6) 18 Map book (5) 19 Determined (6) 22 Saunter (5) 23 Mild argument (4)

Have a lovely Christmas! Marjorie

*Maintenance *Drainage *Driveways

*Landscaping *Fencing *Patios

Contact: Andi Brackenridge T: 07789 681252 Email: [email protected]

J H ELECTRICAL

AND PROPERTY MAINTENANCE SERVICES

• DOMESTIC • INDUSTRIAL • COMMERCIAL

24 HR CALLOUT AVAILABLE All electrical work undertaken

email: [email protected]

Garage Door Solutions LtdYour local garage door expert for:

Replacements, Repairs and Spares

All makes & designs available 24 Hour repair service No call out charge All work guaranteed Free quotations

Call us now on: 01525 721615 / 07761 093468

Website: www.garagedoorsolutionsltd.co.uk Or see the yellow pages

3, Woodcock Walk, Flitwick, Bedfordshire, MK 45 1RD

Your local specialist in UPVC for:- Windows, Doors, Patio Doors and

French Doors, Conservatories Fascia, Soffit and Guttering

Our windows and doors are 70mm internally glazed for security. All windows are fitted with fire hinges, locking handles, a twin action espagnolette mushroom headed bolt system, and with vent facility. Doors are fitted with claw and mortice lock, and panels are reinforced. Fully compliant with current FENSA Regulations, plus insurance backed guarantee.

ARAGON WINDOWSARAGON WINDOWS

CHRIS FREEMAN Tel/Fax 01525 403992

50 Russell Drive Ampthill Beds Established in 1990 and built on reputation


SATURDAY 22nd JANUARY 2011 at 7.00pm

The Shawshank Redemption

presents

The Zonita, named after the legendary 1937 Ampthill Picture House, will recreate an old fashioned cinema experience in Parkside Hall. With a children's matinee and an evening pro-gramme with a fully licensed bar, Ampthill Community Cinema will bring back the golden days of cinema, with state of the art technology

Childrens Matinee at 2.00pm Film to be announced

Tickets £4.50 each available on the door

www.zonita.co.uk facebook.com/zonitaampthill

Email:[email protected]


‘Brother Meerkat’ decided this year HE would make t h e C h r i s t m a s cake….’Sis ter–in law Meerkat’ bravely agreed! A recipe was found…. albeit one for a wedding cake but that would be Ok….’cause all the same really!?! Problem was, it was a recipe for a three tiered cake and the recipe was read horizontal instead of vertical and so enough mixture was made to keep t h e B r i t i s h A r m y constipated for weeks….and to make matters worse somehow the measurement

of the flour managed to get trebled!.... DISASTER?.... absolutely not; The goddess ‘ C R U M B U V O R O U S SLICIST’ met on the cusp and moved into the zodiac p a t h o f ‘ I N G R E D I A N T U L U M CORRECTIUM’ and all seemed well……Hey Ho everyone….another sip of the brandy…no, no….that was suppose to go into the mixture!....too late…. HAVE A VERY HAPPY CHRISTMAS and ALL THE BEST FOR THE NEW YEAR……..

27th December HAPPY BIRTHDAY

HANNAH

Mum & Chris (Su-Bo’s Revenge!)

xxx

With Hayley - D.I.

Thank you for bringing back the hare’s sunglasses - except they were the wrong ones! Good effort though!

‘I’ll fink of somefink silly to say, that I don’t realise that I’ve said.’

RACHEL’S BLINDING DESIGNER FABRICS, INTERIOR DESIGN

STUNNING CURTAINS & BLINDS

Tel: 01525 635946 Mob: 07944 417342

Samples brought to your home Free estimates Over 20 years experience

INDIVIDUAL & PROFESSIONAL

Nik Martin GHSC Registered Counsellor & Hypnotherapist

Phobias, anxiety, stress, depression, addictions, confidence, relationship and sleep problems

Evening & Saturday appointments available

Call 01908 760475www.nik-martin.co.uk


Registered Member of The British Chiropody and Podiatry Association HPC Registration No. CH17913

THERESE GRAY FSSCh. Dip Pod Med. MBChA. Chiropodist/Podiatrist Surgery By Appointment

Telephone: 01525 841845 Email: [email protected]

ICE Integrated Clinical Excellence 35 Russell Drive

Ampthill MK45 2TX

SPOIL SOMEONE THIS CHRISTMAS......THE FEET ARE A

GOOD PLACE TO START. Corns, calluses, nails, bunions, verrucae,foot health advice, shoe advice, hot waxtreatments, reflexology and one hour

foot pamper.Gift Vouchers available


By Julio Van Peebles 1) Do cross eyed teachers have trouble controlling their pupils? 2) Who can remember Fry's Five Centres' ? 3) Why do Building society workers always want to talk to you about something you didn't go in for? 4) Why do people from Jamaica call bacon, 'beercan' ? 5) Why are whistles always deemed to be clean ? Julio’s Top Tip: To pub landlords: Try to convince your customers you are not an alcoholic by walking around with a mug of coffee for the first 20 minutes after opening !

SHIRLEY ROBERTS

Many Happy Returns for December 3rd.

Lots of love Trevor (B.D.)

xxx

With Jimmy The Voice Here’s a Christmas worry! JTV has been building even more impossible things! ...

But has he used four planks of wood to create this or is it just three? We reckon it depends which way you are looking at it ! He has asked us to pass on his very best wishes to all for a delightful Christmas.

Thursday 16th December

OSSORY CHRISTMAS PARTY Charity fun casino, buffet and music Champagne and Mulled Wine

CHRISTMAS EVE

Open 10.30 til 2.30 for breakfast 12.00 noon til 2.30 main menu

EveningLive music with Our Kev

Wednesday 22nd December

Workers’ Christmas Curry 5.30 - 8.30 pm

NEW YEARS EVE

Open 10.30 til 2.30 for breakfast 12.00 noon til 2.30 main menu

EveningFun Charity casino night, music & buffet

Thank you for your custom during 2010

OPEN FOR BREAKFAST EVERY DAY THROUGHOUT CHRISTMAS AND NEW YEAR

MERRY CHRISTMAS AND A HAPPY NEW YEAR FROM

THE OSSORY ARMS 9 Arthur Street, Ampthill 01525 841508

www.ossoryarms.co.uk

If you would like to book an ad in our January edition, please ring Martin on 01525 841434

for all the details!

AT HOME OR WORK Full and part valets, Hand washed and polished

Seats and carpets cleaned Call Nigel on 01525 261485

Mobile 07977 605987 email: [email protected]

Reasonable Rates Experienced Mechanic

Servicing Spares Repairs ON ALL MAKES OF CARS, MOTORCYCLES

LIGHT COMMERCIALS OLD AND NEW MOT’S ARRANGED, MOT WORK CARRIED OUT


You cannot have too many gowns any more than you can have too many invitations to parties to wear them. The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a replacement. My friends husband is so silly that he asked for a battery powered battery charger for Christmas. All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism. Sleep with a light bulb under your pillow. By morning you will have had a bright idea. Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle? Sorry I pulled your nose. I thought you were wearing a Halloween mask. Sorry I’m late for work. I’ve been searching for the hero inside myself. If he brings home flowers for no reason - there’s a reason. Rehab is for quitters. How do you know Santa has to be a man? No woman is going to wear the same outfit year after year. And a very Merry Christmas to you all! 1 1521, 2 Unicef, 3 1830’s, 4

Woolworth, 5 1915, 6 King George V, 7 Pope Julius I, 8 Dec 25th 1957, 9 Oliver Cromwell, 10 Wassailing

1. When was the earliest collection of Christmas cards published?

2. Who produced the first Charity Christmas card in 1949?

3. When was the greetings card invented?

4. Who sold the first manufactured Christmas tree ornaments in 1880?

5. When did Hallmark introduce their first Christmas Card?

6. Who is the first British Monarch to broadcast a Christmas message to his people?

7. Who declared December 25th as official Christmas in the 4th century?

8. When was the Queen’s Christmas message 1st shown on TV?

9. In 1647 which Puritan leader banned Christmas?

10. Christmas Carolling began as an old English custom called what?

The Father Christmas at the store was incredibly surprised when Babs walked up and asked to see him. Normally Santa does not take requests from adults but Babs had smiled so nicely at him he asked her ‘What would you like for Christmas?’ ‘Well, something for my Mother please’ replied Babs. ‘Something for your Mother eh?’ said Santa ‘That’s a very loving and thoughtful gesture - what would you like me to bring her?’ ‘A son-in-law, please.’ said Babs, cleverly.

DRUM DRUM TUITIONTUITION

By professional Masters Musician & Tutor in fully

equipped studio near Bedford. Beginners to advanced - all styles

Tel: Jay 07734 450535Tel: Jay 07734 450535

BUTCHERS

Telephone (01908) 375275 www.bestbutcher.co.uk

Unit 5, Lower Rectory Farm, Great Brickhill, Milton Keynes, Bucks MK17 9AF

ALL MEATS, POULTRY ETC YOU NEEED FOR XMAS

T.H.E. BEST

ALL TYPES OF GROUNDWORKUNDERTAKEN.

Driveways, Patios etc.Please call for free quotation


CANCER (June 22-July 23) The full stream gallop towards the end of the year is now on! Take care not to overdo things on the financial front. But then its Christmas so why not?

LEO (July 24-August 23) The final month of the year may lead you to carefully examine what your goals and objectives are. Take advice from good friends.

VIRGO (Aug 24-Sept 23) Travelling seems to be on the cards for you just now. Are you planning a long trip perhaps? You may well find what you have been looking for.

LIBRA (Sept 24-Oct 23) Enjoy the forthcoming festivities as without doubt there will ne some knuckling down to be done in the new year.

SCORPIO (Oct 24-Nov 22) Gather ye teardrops on the way. For surely that is what you are meant to do. Whatever happens, go carefully and avoid men wearing trainers.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov 23-Dec 22) As we start the inexorable slide towards the end of the year, take care not to set yourself unreasonable targets to achieve.

CAPRICORN (Dec 23-Jan 20) If people make fun of you over the next week or three, they don’t mean to offend - it is really a back handed compliment.

AQUARIUS (Jan 21-Feb 19) Try not to let others take advantage of generosity. It may be that all is not as it seems. Best to listen to what others have to say.

PISCES (Feb 20-March 20) It may be time to throw caution to the wind and in the new year go for what you really want to do. It could prove an exciting time for you.

ARIES (March 21-April 20) Have you achieved all you wanted to over the last year? Perhaps it is now a good time to take stock and go for it in the next few months.

TAURUS (April 21-May 21) If everything looks too good about a new project - then it probably is. Think long and hard for making any form of commitment.

GEMINI (May 22-June 21) There appears to be quite a significant change on the horizon for you. This could well involve an alteration to work patterns.

Outlook this month: Watch out for a large jolly man in a red suit

CHRISTMAS FAYRE AVAILABLE ALL

THROUGH DECEMBER Daniel’s Christmas menu will soon be available which features a magnificent ‘Three Bird Roast’ as a speciality! Perfect for the smaller gathering!

Please ring or pop in for details.

NEW YEAR’S EVE PARTY Following the tremendous success of her ‘Hayleyween’ Party, Hayley is back amongst us to organise a fun filled New Year’s Eve party with special guest appearances and lots more surprises! Please ask for details.

SUNDAY ROASTS

The incredible demand for professional chef Daniel’s Sunday Roasts continues! We have to recommend that you pre-book your tablewell in advance!

REAL ALES

Up to 10 real ales now available!

QUIZ NIGHT EVERY WEDNESDAY

With our resident Quizmaster and his lovely assistant - starts at 9.00 pm. Also: Comfortable smoking area with additional heating just installed!2 bars plus cosy lounge ideal for private conversations, meetings, book clubs etc - pop in and have a look! And a very Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year from Richard, Daniel and the team.

LUXURY CHAUFFEUR DRIVEN CARS

Arrive in style and leave safely

Relax and enjoy the Season’s festivities

with BE-Driven Cars

Party bookings now being taken

BE-Special

t: 01908 281788 m: 07836 780088

www.be-drivencars.co.uk


I’ve got so much to tell you, I hope you’ve got the time, And of course to make it more interesting, I’ve got to make it

rhyme. Some people think it’s easy, but that is just not true,

Especially when you’re busy, and have so much to do. As Christmas will soon be upon us and I hear the children

cheer,But soon it will be over and it will be another new year.

But before it’s all over, Christmas is still a lot of fun, You need to come to Martins and see what we have done.

With Christmas displays in the window, with polar bears and snow,

And we have many Christmas treats on offer, I thought you would like to know.

With sweets to fill your stockings, and two selection packs for, just four pounds,

I have heard rumours we have the best deals around. We’ve got gifts, cards, crackers, Christmas wrap,

just to name but a few, All out in a nice display, ready for you to view. We also have on sale Cadburys crème eggs and

Easter bunnies; Honestly it’s true it’s not Martins trying to be funnies.

I would also like to remind you, that you can still have your papers delivered to your door,

If you would like more information please pop into our store. From all the staff and myself at Martins we would like to

wish you all a happy Christmas, But please don’t leave it to long before you come and see us.

MARTINS NEWSAGENTS 17 CHURCH STREET AMPTHILL. 01525 404314

Fully QualifiedFully Insured10 years Salon Experience

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Free Consultation Sarah Aldous

Call: 07917 727 265 or 01234 768 706Email: [email protected]

Dunstable Street Ampthill Tel: 01525 403319

email: [email protected]

CHRISTMAS @ THE ENGINE

& TENDER

Try our mulled wine throughout

December

OPEN CHRISTMAS DAY

12.00 - 2.00

Join us to celebrate New Year with our buffet and glass of

champagne

Come and have a go on our Prize Board -

£1.00 a go!


4th December HAPPY BIRTHDAY

HELEN!!

Lots of love from ‘The Gang’

Dear Honourable Fuddler Editor, I do not normally write letters to organs, be it yours or anybody else’s, preferring to leave it to my more erudite husband, Mr Charles Garth. However I must express my profound shock, horror, disappointment and downright disgust that despite a promise “to be continued” the Man in Black not only appears to have vanished from the pages of your august journal but also out of our historic Georgian market town altogether. His story-telling was – as I am sure most, if not all, your readers will agree – literature of the very highest calibre. There were elements of Mickey Spillane, Ernest Hemingway, Kafka, Camus, Jean Paul Sartre and even, at times, Enid Blyton. To be honest, I could never understand a blooming word of it. Yours confusedly (but with all best wishes for Christmas), Clarrie Garth (Mrs), Bedford Street, Ampthill

MEN'SINDOOR UNIHOC MORE PLAYERS

WANTED Beginners welcome

Parkside Hall, Ampthill

Saturdays 5pm - 6pm Equipment provided Contact Andrew on

01525 759785 for details

A very Happy Birthday to Katie for the 25th !!

CLOUD NINE DISCO

For DANCES, WEDDINGS, PARTIES, PROMOTIONS, CHILDREN’S PARTIES Etc.

GUY INGLE Professional D.J. / Entertainer

Ingle Entertainments Ampthill (01525) 402475

BMJ HOME & GARDEN SERVICESFor all those jobs around the house and garden,

that you never have time for! We are an established, reliable trustworthy & a very

reasonably priced company. NO JOB TOO SMALL

Tel: Joolz or Michael on01525 211670 Mob: 07871 802815

The Number 1 Ironing and Laundry Service

Professional, high quality and friendly service

Free delivery and collection

Drop-in and collect service available ( Open from 8 am daily )

Optional same day service

For further information contact

LOUISE on01525 841114 Or see our website at

www.pressed4time.info

31, Russell Drive, Ampthill MK45 2TXC f ( // f )


Memory Foam Mattresses Direct from the manufacturer

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visit our website at www.comforthomecare.co.uk


It’s always good to keep up! Q: In golf, where did the term 'Caddie' come from? A. When Mary, later Queen of Scots, went to France as a young girl (for education & survival), Louis, King of France, learned that she loved the Scot game 'golf.' So he had the first golf course outside of Scotland built for her enjoyment. To make sure she was properly chaperoned (and guarded) while she played, Louis hired cadets from a military school to accompany her. Mary liked this a lot and when she returned to Scotland (not a very good idea in the long run), she tookthe practice with her. In French, the word cadet is pronounced 'ca-day' and the Scots changed it into 'caddie.' Thanks once more for this pearl of wisdom!?

1. ‘You could ask my husband. He won’t know though - he’s really rather stupid.’

2. ‘I was a bit disappointed with my all day breakfast - I’d finished it by 11.00!’

Happy Birthday Mr Hardie for 3rd January Love Gretchen

Which have actually appeared in newspapers FREE PUPPIES 1/2 Cocker Spaniel, 1/2 sneaky neighbour's dog. WEDDING DRESS FOR SALE.. Worn once by mistake. STOCK UP AND SAVE Limit one. TIRED OF CLEANING YOURSELF? Let me do it.

We take care of EVERYTHING WE WILL DESIGN

AND INSTALL YOURBATHROOM,OLD SUITES

DISPOSED OF -

ALL WORK FULLY GUARANTEED BEAUTIFUL RANGE OF TOP NAME

SUITES & SHOWERS

PLUMBING ELECTRICS

CARPENTRY TILING

FLOORING DECORATING


NANCY MARGARET ROBERTS

A very Happy Birthday to you for the 1st December

Lots of love from your Son, Daughter in Law, Grandchildren

and Great Grand Children

101 TODAY!!

FARMERS MARKETS The Farmers Market in Woburn is held on the third Sunday of every month at The Pitchings, whilst Ampthill Farmers Market is held on the last Saturday of each month at their new home at The Prince of Wales in Bedford Street, Ampthill. Don’t forget The Charter Market in Ampthill every Thursday and Flitwick Market on Fridays!

Dunstable Street, Ampthill (Formerly Turners - Next to The Albion)

Tel: 01525 630265

CURRENT OPENING TIMES: Monday to Sunday

6 am to 6 pm

OFF LICENCE COMING SOON

Licensing Hours will be: Monday to Wednesday

11 am to 6 pm Thursday to Saturday

11 am to 8 pm Sunday

12.00 to 2 pm

We would like to wish all our customers a very

Merry Christmas and a brilliant New Year!

OFF LICENCE ~ NEWSPAPERS ~ GROCERIES

‘FOR YOUR EVERY DAY ESSENTIALS’

We are bursting with present ideas and the tools to equip you in the

kitchen this Christmas!! …

CHRISTMAS HAMPERS Orders are now being taken for hampers either pre-made or for you to fill with the goodies of your choice! A wonderful way for you to spoil your friends and family who have everything?

CHRISTMAS DELICATESSEN ORDER FORMS

Place your advance order for our scrumptious food goodies, pick the day and we’ll have your selection

ready for you to collect - easy!

CHRISTMAS CAKE DECORATING We hold the equipment to help you finish the

Christmas cake of your dreams! Including cake boards, ribbons, icing, marzipan; edible sprinkles, dusts and silver/gold balls; cake decorations and

much more! Open 7 days a week

Mon - Sat 9.00 - 17.30 + Sun 11.00 -17.00!

4b Bedford Street, Ampthill Tel: 01525 402023


Kindly sent to us by Mr K. Hoy In my hand I hold a ball White and dimpled, rather small. Oh, how bland it does appear, This harmless looking little sphere.By its size I could not guess, The awesome strength it does possess. But since I fell beneath its spell, I’ve wandered through the fires of hell. My life has not been quite the same, Since I chose to play this stupid game.It rules my mind for hours on end,A fortune it has made me spend.It makes me yell, curse and cry, I hate myself and want to die. It promises a thing called par, If I can hit it straight and far. To master such a tiny ball, Should not be very hard at all. But my desires the ball refuses, And does exactly what it chooses.

It hooks, slices, dribbles and diesAnd disappears before my eyes. Often it will have a whim, To hit a tree or take a swim. With miles of grass on which to land,It finds a tiny patch of sand. Then has me offering up my soul,If only it would find the hole. It’s made me whimper like a pup,And swear that I will give it up. And take to drink to ease my sorrow,But it knows ... I’ll be back tomorrow ... So ... Stand proud you noble swingers of clubs and losers of balls ... A recent study found the average golfer walks about 900 miles a year. Another study found golfers drink, on average, 22 gallons of alcohol a year. That means, on average, golfers get about 41 miles to the gallon.

Kind of makes you proud.

Thank you very much for that Mr Hoy and a very Happy Christmas to you!

TRADITIONAL FREEHOUSEPUB AND RESTAURANT

WITH LARGE PATIO GARDEN

NEW YEAR’S DAYBlow the cobwebs awayand come and join usfor a sumptuousLamb Roast

(From 12.00 noon)The Green ManChurch EndEversholtMK17 9DU

Telephone – 01525 288111Website www.greenmaneversholt.com

THE BEDFORD ESTATES

Woburn Firewood Seasoned ash, oak and beech logs

from renewable sources

To place an order or for further information, please contact Diane Willison on 01525 290333 or

email [email protected]

Full load - £125.00 Half load - £70.00

Kindling - £3.00 (per bag)Full load approximately 1.5 cubic meters

Free delivery within 15 miles of Woburn


THE OLD SUN Ampthill.

Tel: 405466

- CHRISTMAS EVE - THE OLD SUN CHRISTMAS PARTY

HOUSE SPIRITS BUY ONE GET ONE FREE

- SUNDAY 19TH DECEMBER - CHRISTMAS QUIZ AT 7PM

GET YOUR THINKING CAPS ON!!

- TUESDAY 21ST DECEMBER - AN EVENING OF CHRISTMAS CAROLS CONDUCTED BY MR RAFF AND LED BY MEMBERS OF AMPTHILL TOWN BAND

FUNCTIONS CATERED FOR PLEASE CALL FOR DETAILS

CONTACT TELEPHONE NUMBER 01525 405466

87 Dunstable Street , Ampthill MK45 2NQ

What’s on at CHRISTMAS 2010

- THROUGHOUT THE CHRISTMAS PERIOD - MULLED WINE AND OPEN FIRES

COME AND WARM UP AT THE OLD SUN

- NEW YEARS EVE - JOIN US TO SEE IN THE NEW YEAR - FORGET THE COLD

HAWAIIAN THEME PARTY - NO TICKET REQUIRED LAIRY SHIRT OPTIONAL

- SATURDAY 18TH DECEMBER - POSH PRESENT WRAPPING HAVE SOMEONE ELSE WRAP YOUR

GIFTS AND SIT BACK WITH A DRINK WHILE THEY DO THE WORK! ALL DONATIONS TO GAMBIA PROJECT

- CHRISTMAS DAY - MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL OPEN 12 - 3


ROCKET’SGRAND TOUR

ON A BMW MOTORCYCLE

(copied from his daily journal) Day 1

18th October 2010 Ferry from Dover to Dunkirk is booked for 10am, filled up with petrol last night. (£32-60p) Bit of a miserable dark morning, got to Dover at 9-05am. Going great until I hit M1. The M25 and M20 were fine, as all motorways should be! Rain stopped at Dartford, now waiting to board ferry, hope I am in right bit. Bike absolutely faultless, knobbly tyres feel

funny, but seem very tractable and grip road well. As I write this, the sun has just come out, 9-23 am and 138 miles later. Had a Cornish pasty, chocolate pain and tea. A bit of a mixed English and French meal seemed appropriateBought a puzzle book and road map of France. Ironically the shop on board does not sell pens or pencils, even though they stock sketch pads and puzzle books. Borrowed a pen from a lady behind desk. Bit late docking as a container ship was blocking the harbour. Rode off boat and pulled up 202 miles later at Lille, time

is 13-46. Now heading down towards Rheims and Dijon. 13-48 fuel getting low, must keep under 70mph to keep economy. Stopped for a break in Rheims at 16-31, 347 miles. (First photo stop) The road from Rheims to Troyes is so vast and barren, reminds me very much of t h e C a m b r i d g e / Lincolnshire fens, the smell of the hills with their granarys, oats etc reminds me of Jordan’s factory on the Mile Rd in Bedford! Arrived in Troyes, very cold here, so found a hotel for the night. 50 euros plus 4 euros for bike parking, 434 miles. Had a wander round and found a kebab café. Had a

French version of a large Doner- very nice-, loads of these shops, all Indian owned. Cost 5-50 euro with a cola. Took a walk down some back alleys, the buildings are all half timbered. Medieval/Tudor, lovely! Very ancient old place. In hotel now, planning the next leg of my journey. My room is on the main road and I can see two war memorials, one to the fallen of the two world wars and the other to the Algerian conflict, which I don’t know anything about. Probably one of the few wars the British were not involved in. It is now 21-49 and I am going to sleep. To be continued ....

THE FIRS GUEST HOUSE & CAFE

85, High Street, Ridgmont, Beds Tel: 01525 280279 or 288282

www.thefirsatridgmont.co.uk

GREAT VALUE AT THE FIRS!

Bed & Breakfast from only £25.00 pppn CONTRACTORS WELCOME

Why not call in for one of our FAMOUS ALL DAY BREAKFASTS?

Plus … Teas, coffees, sandwiches, rolls and a large selection of home cooked meals at

£5.00 or less! Eat in or take away

DAB HAND LAWN CARE The lawn expert, giving you a lawn to be proud of

Feeding \ Weeding Repairing \ Laying

Seeding and Mowing The Complete Service

Tel: 01525 713540 07710 501008

‘We really do make the difference’

For a 1st Class MILK DELIVERY

SERVICE TELEPHONE 01525 402206

Maulden Dairies Warren Farm, Woburn Street, Millbrook

Free doorstep delivery

Organic and Soya Milk available

Luxury Jersey Cream

Christmas soft drinks and mixers


With Ann, Robin & Son, For your delectation and pleasure, here are some more of those unbelievable answers that contestants have come up with on various game shows. 1) Name something made of lace?........................Embroidery 2) Name a country beginning with S............................Ceylon 3) What is the chemical symbol for water?.................Oxygen 4) What year was the Battle of Hastings?.........................19145) What colour are dandelions?......................................White 6) What is the capital of Canada?.....................................Paris 7) Name a part of the body beginning with N..................Knee 8) Name something you keep in the freezer.....................Milk 9) Name a US state which has a coastline....................Mexico 10)What kind of creature is the barbary ape found on Gibraltar?................Err? well it's not a monkey? Err? Sloth !!

One of our readers has been good enough to forward these very clever gems to us! Family restaurants Signs:‘Open seven days a week. Closed Sundays.’ ‘Parking for drive-through customers only.’ ‘We are Handicapped - Friendly. If you are blind, we will read the menu for you.’ ‘Hot drinks to take out or sit in.’ ‘Don't stand there and be hungry, come in and get fed up.’Many thanks again!

If you would like to advertise with us please ring Martin on 01525 841434

to check on space availability.

Beat the credit crunch with Formula One Scooters

www.f1scooters.co.uk

WE NOW HAVE A FULLY EQUIPPED WORKSHOP AND CAN SERVICE AND REPAIR ANY MAKE OF

SCOOTER 50 CC TO 125 CC

With the price of car-parking, tax and petrol, the ideal vehicle for commuting is a scooter; a years’ tax on a scooter is only £15. Very cheap to insure. At Most rail stations parking for a scooter is free (£6.20 a day for a car), coupled by the fact that you can actually park. The other obvious advantage is that you can get circa 100 miles to a gallon.

You can ride a 50 cc at age 16, or if you have a full car licence, just twist and go, no test or ‘L’ plates required. (Providing licence obtained prior to February 2001)

September is fast approaching so why don’t you treat yourself to a brand new 60 plate Scooter FROM AS LITTLE AS £750.00 BRAND NEW, TAXED REGISTERED AND ON THE ROAD.

ORDER NOW TO BEAT THE JANUARY VAT INCREASE!

F1 Scooters Unit D, Station Road Business Park, Ampthill, Beds MK45 2QY

(Immediately behind Eckart) 0845 313 8400 07961 775420

...are Milton Keynes’s premier airport transfer company.

Whether a business trip, or a much needed break, Airports Direct are dedicated to getting you to

and from your airport stress free and in comfort and style. 100% reliable, professional service

guaranteed. DVD’s / coolers available.

T: 0800 707 6003 E: [email protected]

www.airportsdirectmk.com 33 White Alder, Stacey Bushes

Milton Keynes, MK12 6HE Company No. 5318754 (England & Wales)


Plumbing supplies for the trade and DIY er at discount prices. We will beat any genuine like for like written quote by

10% on all our stock items.

Forget the rest give us a test Speak to our plumbing expert for advice

on your plumbing problems


With Kerf Headcap Kerf’s been out and about again finding more silly words and their new dictionary definitions: ADULT- A person who has stopped growing at both ends and is now growing in the middle. BEAUTY PARLOR - A place where women curl up and dye. CHICKENS - The only animal you eat before they are born and after they are dead. COMMITTEE - A body that keeps minutes and wastes hours. DUST - Mud with the juice squeezed out. EGOTIST - Someone who is usually me-deep in conversation. HANDKERCHIEF - Cold Storage. INFLATION - Cutting money in half without damaging the paper. MOSQUITO - An insect that makes you like flies better. POLITICAL CORRECTNESS - A doctrine, fostered by a delusional, illogical minority. RAISIN - Grape with a sunburn. SECRET - Something you tell to one person at a time. TOOTHACHE - The pain that drives you to extraction. TOMORROW - One of the greatest labour saving devices of today. YAWN - An honest opinion openly expressed. WRINKLES - Something other people have....similar to my character lines. And thank you very much - things are a lot clearer now!

OFFICE: SMART Motorcycle Training

38, Kings Road, Maulden, Beds MK45 2DT

TRAINING CENTRE: SMART Motorcycle Training,

Redborne School, Ampthill, Beds MK45 2NU

www.thepetaupair.co.ukwww.thepetaupppppppppppppppaaair.co.uk

DOG WALKING

Excellent socialisation for your dog, peace of mind for you!

PET SITTING

Rabbits, guinea pigs, hamsters, birds, rats & ferrets are welcome in our home!

PET TRANSPORTING

01525 860606


ORDER NOW AND BEAT THE VAT INCREASE!


U-teka-da-ronga-boats (From last month) West Sicily July 1972 The basement of the house was an enormous water cistern but the water was no good for photographic processing so I used to drive to Peligrino’s winery in Marsala some 12 miles south and get distilled water, I learned to say “scusi, posso avere venti litro di aqua distilato per photographia , io lavoro soto la mare, expeditione archeologica.” It worked mainly because they had probably been warned that an ignorant Inglasie would be asking for distilled water. The expedition was funded t h r o u g h a n u m b e r o f mechanisms, (none of my business, I know nothing), but one local gentleman took a great interest in the project, I am not sure if he gave money but he found “things” that were useful, like the 18kW diesel generator plus workmen to install it in a purpose built shed! I re-discovered said generator two years ago on the nearby island of Mothia.

Generator being installed, prior to shed being built round it. It appears that I am trying to push it into position! ( white shorts on left) There were few cars in that part of Sicily with British number plates, in fact we never saw one that did not belong to the team, until one day while driving through Marsala we saw a VW Beetle with UK plates, this resulted in a bit of a celebration back at the site, catching up with news from England etc. The following morning, I was awakened along with several of my team mates, all with a slightly thick head, to the shouts from our leader, Honor Frost, to get up and pay attention. All our boats had gone in the night, I cannot remember if this included the biggest boat that was hired from a local fisherman who came with it, (he also supplied 20

litre bottles of white wine every few days, I use the term “wine” loosely!). Anyway, the RIBs and inflatable boats where gone plus their outboards! I think the histrionics where therapy rather than a solution to the problem, unless it was hoped that one of us had hidden the boats in a tent! What followed was quite spectacular. The “gentleman patron” to the expedition was Signor Pilari, he spoke little English in my presence but I would not be surprised to learn that he spoke several languages fluently, He was always dressed immaculately with a camel hair coat over his shoulders and two large gentlemen walking just behind him in dark suits; if this was done today, they would have had curly white wires behind their ears! The man visited our site during the day following the theft. We immediately had two Caribinieri guards at night and for some of the day time AND all the boats came back within two days. The theory / rumour that spread was that the boats had been stolen by bad people who used them to do drug runs to North Africa, and that our benefactor had spies who would have found this out and known how to reverse the situation, i.e. get the boats back There is no doubt that Signor Pilari was an influential man and I have to say I felt safer knowing he was on our side. Sadly, Honor Frost died in September this year (2010) and while we were back in Sicily last month, stories of her contribution to the historic wealth of the city of Marsala was all over the news papers Her obituary only appeared recently in the Guardian on the 26 Oct. I have been fortunate enough to be in the right place at the right time to meet many people and experience made special things, the problem is that on this and many other occasions, I did not realise that I was so fortunate at the time! Prof Reginald V Q da Ghama IPA With kind permission of Jim Barr

DISCOS FOR ALL OCCASIONS For The Very Best Disco Around

All The Latest Chart Sounds Great Giveaway Prizes

Receptions For ALL Occasions Very Competitive Prices

Tel: Micky or Joolz on 01525 211670

The Wingfield Club Ltd. C.I.U. Affiliated

37 Church Street, Ampthill, Beds 01525 403321 (Bar) 01525 841736 (Office)

Meeting rooms & Large Lounge for hire Free WiFi

PLUS

£2.70 £2.90 £2.45

£2.45 £2.45 £2.70

£2.70 £2.80 WINES A fine selection of wines in

187 ml bottles all at £2.50 each KAREOKE

Every second Saturday of the month BINGO

Every Thursday evening

LIVE ENTERTAINMENT See noticeboard inside bar area


Heater & 13kg Bottle of gas from only £94.99


An annual re-union

. . . In Arthur’s World Met up with an old mate of mine in Ampthill a couple of weeks ago. I was thoroughly enjoying the Granddad’s obligatory round of school Xmas fetes. What a roaring success they were, lots of fun, lots of quality stuff on sale and lot’s of cash raised for worthy causes. That’s what the season is all about ! ! Down at Russell Lower, for the littlest one’s bash, a Yo Ho Ho type voice roared “Hi Arthur – how are you doing old friend”. I could well have done without the personal reference to “old” but there over my shoulder was one of my best mates, Santa

Claus alias Father Christmas. Now he is old – and he’s got the hairstyle to prove it. We go back nearly 75 years, Santa and me – I’ve almost grown up with him. We started off on a Xmas Eve drinking warm milk together. Gradually progressed to bitter shandy and then a sly sherry all served with my mam’s best mince pies. Age and circumstance has projected us to savouring a rather good single malt together on a Xmas Eve and, as it should be, with the inevitable mince pie. “What are you doing down from Lapland this early” I queried.“Thought I’d get myself out and about doing a bit of market research” he replied. What? – you mean a Maori Poll type thing” I asked

“Aye – something like that” he replied. But I did need to see the kids of Ampthill and surrounds before the big event. They like it and I enjoy it Anyway it transpires that the MOT on Rudolph’s Sleigh is up for renewal and a couple of new reindeer are unsure of the route – so they did a dummy run. The undercarriage and flaps on the sleigh will need some adjusting before the MOT. Need them correcting to get under the Christmas Lights and into some of the darker corners of Ampthill. He borrowed my mobile to check on production schedules back at Lapland HQ “All going well” he said “aim to get everything on the sleigh on time with everybody happy on Christmas morning”. He made quite a few little kids

very happy that afternoon – it was a joy to see. I went outside to give Rudolph and his mates a bucket of water and some raw carrots for tea to set them on their way before it got dark. - Santa had left the headlights at home ! ! “Don’t do that with my present” I said as he clambered on board. “and don’t forget the Single Malt - it’s your turn to pay this year !” “Stingy blighter – typical of a Geordie” he replied. “See you in a few weeks” honked Rudolph. Then with a massive Yo Ho Ho and a big Santa smile and a wave to the happy faces of Ampthill, they were on their way via the MOT Station What a guy, what a mate ! !

A full range of original and compatible ink cartridges and toners Paper, Envelopes, Pens, Binders etc

All at Competitive Prices

FIND US AT

Unit 1, 101 Ampthill Road Flitwick Bedfordshire MK45 1BE

(Behind the Shell Garage)

tel: 01525 633336 www.businesspoint.uk.com

Building Preservation Specialists Damp ProofingWoodworm TreatmentsDry / Wet Rot TreatmentsBasement Waterproofing

Telephone/Fax (01525) 406655 Mobile: 07850 727752 email: [email protected]

16 Tavistock Avenue, Ampthill, Bedford. MK45 2RY

Extensions Conservatories & Windows Kitchens & Bathrooms Fencing PatiosElectrical And … Lots More!

Back Neck Shoulder

Other muscle & joint pain

Tel: 01525 405759

The clinic is in Ampthill town centre, and you are most welcome to contact me for further advice about

osteopathy, and whether it could help you.

www.osteo-pathway.co.uk

1 Kings Arms Yard (off Church St)

Ampthill MK45 2PJ

OSTEOPATH Help for painful musculoskeletal conditions


Answers by email to [email protected] or on a postcard to The Fuddler, PO Box 756 Ampthill Bedford MK45 2WZ Answer next month!

With Lauren Louella Boughalls Congratulations to Mr Bailey and everyone else who correctly identified last month’s poser as the Clophill lock-up dating from the 19th Century. This building can be found at the back of the green. Now for this month: I have been out and about with Algi and came across this delightful clock. Where may one find it?

T Butlin Building and Plastering Est 1987

www.timbutlinbuilders.co.uk

For your extensions, renovations, alterations, Upvc fascias / soffitts,

guttering, block paving and all plastering.

Tel: 01525 405670 / Mob: 07778 680393

Also offering:

Impressions Female decorators

All aspects of painting and decorating.

With female finesse to make the most of your home

Tel 01234 751282 or 01525 405670 / Mob: 07944 710179


Here we bring you more from the whimsical world of Montgolfier: I went to the Doctor’s and he asked me what was wrong. I said that I had got a big lump on my back. He asked me to take my coat off so that he could have a look. Then he asked: ‘When did you leave school?’ I asked him why. He said ‘Well, I think I just found your satchel.’ Did you know that men always wore boots until shoes came out around the time of World War 1. Shoes didn’t really catch on for a while and they were called ‘Tea Drinkers’. Also when men’s wristwatches first came out they didn’t sell very well as they were considered to be women’s jewellery. What is a Pugil? Well it is to do with snuff. If you use your thumb and one finger to take snuff, that is a pinch of snuff. If you use your thumb and two fingers that a pugil of snuff. Did you know that Church Sunday schools were started so that parents got an hour of privacy? Well, that’s all for this year! But a very merry Christmas and a Happy New year to you all.

ALL PLUMBING WORK UNDERTAKEN BATHROOM INSTALLATION / REPAIR CENTRAL HEATING INSTALLATION / REPAIR POWER FLUSHING GUTTERINGBLOCKED DRAINS

PLEASE CALL: 07768 962770 email: [email protected] Website: www.mattunderwoodplumbing.co.uk

MATTHEW UNDERWOOD PLUMBING & HEATING

Based in Flitwick


Christmas Cheer Just to let my reader know that my school work is now all done and in the January edition of this tome the second and excit ing concluding instalment of the French adventure will appear. May I take this opportunity to wish you, the reader of this column and all the other Fuddler readers a very happy festive period.

Naiad Spotted flittering

around Bungay!

MERRY CHRISTMAS FROM OUTER SPACE Hello, I am from a far distant planet some 30million light years from earth, my name is udprhgsuvsuihv, but most people call me Gary! I come to Earth at this time to visit your Christmas customs and festivities. I have with me a small machine which enables me to speak and write in your language otherwise commnication would be impossible. Occasionally this device does tend to play up a bit and does not splog a lom a bop a twom your language properly, Whoops! there it goes again! We find some of your Christmas customs a bit splom a gog a pom, especially the song, the 12splom a bots of Christmas. Oh dear, my machine is not good today, I think it needs a good pol a spok clean. Going back to your Christmas, I mean what is the point of singing splom a splom a pop bop shog a twob in a pear tree? Oh dear this is getting very splop splop annoying!! I think I will stop now and wish everyone on Earth a very happy Christmas and a spop splop a spom new year. Oh dear! Oh dear! What am I going to do with this spop pop tom a gom ...dy thing !!! Happy days udprhgsuvsuihv (Gary)

At least I get a tree to peep round! But who am I? I am an actress appearing on your television sets in a hugely popular American TV series.You’ll find the answer at the foot of the page.

Robin Tunney from The Mentalist

U.P.V.C. Installation Specialist Certass Registered. 10 year Insurance Backed Guarantee

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AT PRICES YOU CAN AFFORD

Tel: 01525 720 696 Email:[email protected]

‘A Business Built on Recommendation’

Outstanding gardensdesigned foroutdoor living

Small garden? - no problem Large garden? - We love them!

Electrical Contractor Domestic and Industrial

Your local Electrical Contractor All types of testing and certification undertaken

FREE QUOTATIONSNICEIC Approved Contractor

Working with Ampthill Town Council 11 Cedar Close, Ampthill, Bedford, MK45 2UD

Tel & Fax: 01525 714057

BOB AMBLERHOME DESIGNS

CarpentryKitchens - Bedrooms

Home Offices - Bathrooms Replacement Kitchen Doors

Worktops and Built in Appliances A complete design, supply and

installation service01525 405393 ans. phone

Mobile: 07889 058345


Ladies SSP OUR

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212 Sexy Edp 30 ml Spray 30.00 £19.95 10.05

Bvlgari Rose Essentialle Edp 30 ml Spray 39.99 £19.95 20.04

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212 Men Edt 50 ml Spray 34.00 23.95 10.05

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Jazz Edt 50 ml Spray 36.00 £19.95 16.05

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Benetton Hot Edt 100 ml Spray 20.00 £8.95 11.05

Ck Be Edt 100 ml Spray 31.00 £24.95 6.05 Please call in and see our new and exciting range

of Christmas Gifts!

The fragrances shown here are only available whilst stocks last

Prices subject to availability

the fuddler december 2010

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